John puts his pants on and leaves the room, slamming the door behind him. I stay curled up on the cold wooden floor. I feel dirty, worthless; like I'm nothing. This is the worst feeling. Did I lead him on? Did I deserve it? I scan my brain some kind of answer as to why this happened, it always comes back to me. Something's wrong with me. I'm not supposed to have a good life. I'm not supposed to be happy.

I can't let my life be this way. I have to do something. I listen to make sure he's gone downstairs. I quietly put my pajamas back on, followed by my boots. I empty the books from my backpack and fill it with as many clothes as I can fit. I put my hoodie on and go to the window.

It's a long way down but if I swing over to the drainpipe I can climb to the ground and run. I make sure to be completely silent as I hike my legs up and out of the window. While I stand on the ledge of the window, I reach over to the pipe, it's a little slippery but I can make it. I grasp it with both hands and step on to the brackets holding the pipe in place. I slowly slide down to the next one. I'm about two meters from the ground when I lose my footing and plummet to the long weedy grass. I keep silent even though the pain in my shoulder is agonizing. I scramble to my feet and bolt. I run through the streets of San Diego, unsure of where to go. I could go to Sophia's, but it's on the other side of town, I'd collapse before I got there. I could go to school, but it'll be empty. I suddenly see Callie's house in my mind. It's hard to remember the route but I cut through a few alleyways and find myself on their long street. I keep sprinting until I get up to their front porch.

Can I do this? Can I go into their house and ask for help? Do I even deserve their help? No, I can't think like that. I have to do this. I can't give up now. I take a second to catch my breath before knocking on the door. What if they turn me away? What if they send me back? I don't have a choice; this is my only option. I pound on the door and ring the doorbell. I'm in tears and covered in mud. Stef opens the door and stares at me in disbelief.

"I didn't know what to do," I say quietly through my tears. I see Callie come down the stairs behind her.

"Gracie?" She comes to the door. She sees the state I'm in and pulls me into a hug. I flinch from the pain in my shoulder, but I embrace the hug anyway. I need to feel the touch of a person that isn't going to hurt me.

Lena brings me a cup of hot tea as Callie and I sit on their sofa. She's wrapped a blanket around and she's holding my hand. Stef and Lena sit opposite. The setting feels very much like Lena's office at school.

"Are you ready to tell us what happened?" Stef asks. We've been sat in silence for almost an hour, it's about one in the morning. "Remember, I'm a cop, I can help." She says. I sit upright, still holding Callie's hand.

"When I got back to the house, it was just John there." Saying his name feels like it's happening all over again. "And I sat down with him to watch TV and-" I have to stop myself.

"It's okay Gracie, go on," Callie says.

"He started acting weird towards me, getting closer and closer. He told me I was pretty, and uh, that I was um, sexy." I shiver. "So, I went upstairs to get away from him and I went to bed, but he followed me and told me he wanted me to feel confident because I'm beautiful. Then he tried to kiss me." I choke on my words. "And I pushed him off, but he didn't stop. He-" I have to stop again, I start hyperventilating.

"Did he hurt you, love? Did he touch you?" Stef asks. I nod, trying to breathe through my panic attack. I cry louder than I ever have. Callie hugs me again, rocking me back and forth. She tells me to take deep breaths. Lena gets me a glass of ice water. I take baby sips in every little break I have, but it goes on for about 20 minutes. By this point, the rest of the Adams-Fosters are standing in the hallway, watching me like I'm an animal in a zoo. I don't know how much they heard.

"Boys go to bed, Mariana can you set up the guest bed for Gracie." They all nod and leave. "You're staying here tonight. You're safe here." Stef comes and sits on my other side and hugs me. I finally start to calm down. She brushes my hair behind me, then touches my neck. "Gracie, you have bruises on your neck, was this him?" I nod. I show her the ones on my hips and my arms.

"And um, I had to climb out of the window and fell on my shoulder," I tell her. I stand up and show her.

"Okay, we'll take you to get that checked tomorrow, Callie, take Gracie to your room. Try to get some sleep okay."

Callie takes my hand and walks me upstairs. She shows me the beautiful room she shares with Mariana, who's sat on the edge of her bed.

"Hey," She says in a soft voice. "Do you need any more blankets?" She asks. I look at the pop-up bed and see about four pillows and a bundle of blankets.

"No, thank you." I climb into the bed and pull the blankets over me. Callie and Mariana get into their beds, Callie reaches to turn the lamp off. "Um, Callie, can you leave it on please?"

"Sure, goodnight."

I curl up in a ball again and stare at the wall. Feeling hollow inside. I still don't feel safe. I know nothing will happen to me here, but I still feel like I can't breathe. I try to fall asleep, but I just see John, hovering over me, with that sick, satisfied look on his face. So, I just lie here, still staring at the wall, for the whole night. I watch the daylight come through the cracks on either side of the blinds. Another sleepless night.

Callie and Mariana both wake to the sound of their alarms. I sit up and they both look at me.

"Morning, do you want to come down for breakfast." It doesn't feel like it's been six hours since Callie was saying good night.

"Okay." I only agree because I don't want to be alone. So, I get out of the bed and follow them downstairs. I'm still in last night's muddy pajamas while everyone else is dressed for school. Stef's in her cop uniform again.

"Morning girls, did you sleep okay Gracie?" Lena asks. I sit down in between Callie and Jude.

"Not really," I say honestly. Stef puts down a plate of waffles in front of me. I just stare at it. "Thanks." I'm not hungry at all but I take a few bites to just to be polite. They let me into their home, the least I can do is eat the food they make for me.

"Mama can't drive you today, so you'll have to drive yourselves," Stef addresses the kids. "Gracie, your social worker is coming over at lunchtime. I'll be back on my lunch break, so you'll have both of us here with you." I nod as I take a breath. I'll have to tell the whole story, maybe more than once.

"We're gonna be late," Callie says. "Good luck Gracie, I'll see you later." She hugs me again and they all grab their backpacks and head out. I stay sat at the kitchen table.

"I have to go to work, by my love." Stef kisses Lena. "I'll see you later, Gracie." She leaves with her coffee. I'm still staring at my plate full of food.

"Not hungry?" I shake my head. "That's okay." She takes it away from and sits down next to me. "Can I get you anything? Anything at all?"

"No, thank you, I'm okay." I'm most definitely not okay, but I don't want to keep unloading on this family. They've done enough.

"Do you want to talk a little more? You're going to have to tell a detective or a cop at some point."

"But I told Stef," I say.

"It needs to be in a more formal setting, probably in a police station. And you'll need to include some more details. But if you can tell me everything now, it might make it easier to tell it again." I nod to her.

"Okay, well I told you the start of it," I continue to tell her everything, start to finish. He made me touch him, and then he touched me. Like he was entitled to my body. "It was my fault; I must have given him the wrong idea."

"No, that's not true. No one deserves to be assaulted like that." I didn't think of it as assault until now. "The man who did this is a criminal, we'll make sure he's put away for good." She hugs me, tears in her eyes. "You'll get through this." I wish she could foster me. I would give anything to be a part of a family like this one, to be loved. It's not that my dad didn't love me, it's just that he was so depressed all the time that it was like he didn't have time for me. I've never lived in a home where I have someone to depend on. I thought maybe I had finally got it when I got to John and Mary's, but I guess I was wrong.

I sit in the living room with Lena, we watch the news mostly. Then lunchtime comes, along with Stef and Anita. A few minutes later another cop comes to the door.