Rae and I lay side by side holding hands on the beach. I don't regret it; I know it was wrong because technically I'm dating Jason, but I'm one hundred percent sure that that's over now. I don't know if Rae and I could even happen but right now it doesn't matter. Nothing does. I just want to be here with her.

"Are you okay?" She looks over to me, I'm smiling like an idiot.

"I am." For the first time in a while, I've answered that question honestly. "Are you?"

"I'm better than okay." She kisses me again.

"I better get back, I didn't tell anyone where I was going, and I left my phone at home because I knew they'd all try to call me." I get up, brush the sand off of me, and pull Rae up off the ground. She's looking right in my eyes. "What?"

"You called it home."

"Whatever, you know what I mean. Thanks for meeting me." I kiss her cheek.

"You're gonna leave me with that?" She grabs my waist and pulls me in for a real kiss. "Text me, I wanna see you again."

"Okay. See you." I start to walk away, she holds my hand like she doesn't want to let go, but eventually, she does. I can feel her watching me as I walk.

As I make my way back to the Foster's, I find myself facing reality again. Stef and Lena are going to be so mad at me for disappearing. I knock on the door and immediately Jesus opens the door.

"She's back!" He shouts to his family.

"Oh, thank God!" I hear Lena say as she and the rest of the family swarm around me in the hallway. "We were so worried." I thought they'd yell at me the second they saw me but she and Stef both hug me.

"Where did you go?" Callie asks.

"I was just meeting Sophia." I'm not sure why I decided to lie. "Sorry I didn't mean to scare you guys. Just everything earlier stressed me out, but it's okay now." I make brief eye contact with Brandon.

"Okay, well kids you go upstairs and study, we're just going to talk to Gracie for a minute." They all do as Stef says and go up to their rooms. Lena, Stef, and I go and sit in the living room.

"Again, I'm so sorry. It won't happen again."

"Listen, and this is completely up to you, we want to give you the choice of whether or not to stay with us, given what happened earlier," Stef says. I'm a little confused.

"You want me to leave?" I ask. I knew this would happen.

"No honey, God no." Lena moves from the armchair she's sat in to come and sit with me on the couch. "We like having you here, but we're not sure you're comfortable."

"I am comfortable, I mean earlier was bad but it's still a mile better than any other home I've been in."

"Well, that's great to hear. We talked to Brandon, he said he straightened things out with you?" Stef asks.

"Yeah, we're cool now. He was just trying to look out for me." They nod along. "So, are you going to punish me?" I sigh.

"You're grounded, for a week," Stef says.

"That's more than fair, sorry again."

"Go on up to bed, you come and talk to one of us or one of the kids if you need to. They've all made it pretty obvious that they're here for you, and so are we." Lena puts her arm around me. I head upstairs. Mariana and Callie are still up doing homework.

"What did they say?" Mariana asks. I sit down next to her.

"Grounded for a week."

"Why are you smiling?" She and Callie laugh at me.

"Because I've never had a punishment that doesn't involve being forced to skip dinner, locked in my room, or taking a beating, this home is amazing."

"You were smiling when you walked in the front door too." Callie comes and joins us on Mariana's bed. "Pretty weird considering you were in a pretty bad mood when you left, did you talk to Jason?" I suddenly feel guilty.

"Uh no, I didn't." My smile fades.

"Are you okay?" Mariana puts her hand on my arm.

"I messed up," I say quietly. "I thought maybe, Jason and I were done but I'm starting to realize that he's a good guy and he'd understand," I ramble.

"Calm down, Gracie, what do you mean?"

"I kissed someone else." They look at each other. "I knew it, I'm a terrible person." I flop back on Mariana's bed.

"No, Gracie, it's okay. You made a mistake, the best of us do. You need to stop being so hard on yourself." Mariana makes me sit back up.

"What do I do?" I start crying a little.

"First of all, stop the tears." Callie laughs as she dries my cheek with her sleeve. "Boys aren't worth crying over, second of all, you and Jason aren't official, so it's okay. That being said, you should probably talk to Jason. He felt really bad when you stormed out at dinner."

"Why did he feel bad? I'm the one in the wrong."

"He said it's his fault that you felt like you couldn't talk to him about it."

"But why would I? We've only been together for like a few days."

"He obviously really likes you," Mariana says, only making me feel guiltier. "Do you not like him back?"

"I do, at least- I thought I did." Kissing Jason is different from kissing Rachel, I don't know how to feel.

"Who was this 'someone else' you kissed?" Callie asks.

"Rae, she's from-" I don't want to tell them she's John's daughter, they would judge me. "She's from an old foster home. We got back into contact and started talking, texting. I just fell for her, and now I feel awful because of Jason, and I just proved Brandon right." I'm such an idiot.

"It's not about Brandon, this is about you. What do you want? Who do you want?" Mariana gets serious, not her usual giggly self.

"I don't know, I clicked with Jason but with Rae, it's different. She's special."

"I think you just answered the question," Callie says.

"Girls," Stef comes in. "Lights out please, you have school tomorrow. Goodnight loves." We all say goodnight, I thank the girls for helping me out and we all go to bed. I find myself drifting to sleep when I suddenly remember that tomorrow is my birthday, Jason was going to plan something for me. That's probably not going to happen now. I'll never get to sleep.

The next morning, I wake up completely exhausted. I was tossing and turning all night, not only dreading today but also dreading talking to Jason. I decide to act like it's just a normal day because as far as I'm concerned, it is. I eat breakfast with everyone and get dressed and Callie drives Jude, Jesus and I to school, Mariana and Brandon both have a free period.

Jesus and I sit in the back seat. "You got grounded, huh?" Jesus asks. "I remember when Stef and Lena grounded me for the first time, yeah I hit this kid in my class." He laughs. "It's okay though, kind of worked out for the best, that's how we found out I have ADHD."

"Oh, uh cool? I guess." He's laughing, so I just laugh along too. I had no idea he had ADHD. I learn something new about the Fosters every day. It makes me feel closer to them, like I'm a real part of the family.

When we get to school, Jason is waiting in the parking lot for me. I don't know what to do, do I talk to him? Do I ignore him? Callie sees him and then notices me panicking. She turns me to face her.

"It's okay, just go talk to him. You got this." She turns me back around. "Go." I take a deep breath and walk over to Jason, keeping my distance.

"Hey," He says, he's looking right into my eyes, but I can't look back at him the same way, I keep staring at the ground.

"Listen. About what Brandon said, I'm sorry. I don't know what's going on with me right now." He takes my hand.

"It's okay. All is forgiven. And forgotten." He puts his arm around me. I'm confused, but I'm too nervous to say anything else. He just smiles at me and walks me inside, like nothing ever happened. At lunch, he waits for me at my locker. He doesn't say a word, just takes my hand and starts running, I have no idea where he's taking me, but I know it must be for my birthday. He leads me behind the school through the overgrown trees, where pretty much no one ever goes because there's no cell signal or WIFI. In the small patch where the weeds don't cover the grass, there's a blanket and a picnic basket. There are LED candles forming a heart shape around the blanket and even a little cupcake with a candle on it. He sits down bringing me with him.

"This is beautiful. You didn't have to do this."

"Happy Birthday, beautiful. Our second date." He kisses me. I feel kind of awkward, and very guilty but I play along. I'm too scared of what would happen if I told him that I kissed someone else. He's so committed to me. "Here." He picks up the little blue cupcake and lights the candle. "Make a wish." I haven't made a birthday wish in years, I haven't made any kind of wish, because I know that nothing I want ever happens. I close my eyes pretending to be deep in thought, and I blow out the candle.

We sit and eat all the little snacks he's prepared for us, it's so romantic and beautiful and perfect. I feel so guilty. I was sure after talking with Callie and Mariana that I was going to end it with him, well I thought Jason would end it. But he just treats me so well, and that's hard to come by in my life. I have to take what I can get.

After school I try to avoid Jason's invitation to walk home with me, I tell him I promised Callie I would go to the library with her, luckily my lie is strengthened when she comes to tell me we have to run an errand for Stef and Lena. He kisses me goodbye which makes Callie give us a weird look. I get into her little blue Mini with her, I know she's going to ask about it.

"Please don't ask about Jason, I don't wanna talk about it right now."

"Okay, whatever you want. So, moms want us to get some groceries and stuff." She says, driving suspiciously slowly. "They're gonna be late home again so it's you and me on dinner duty."

"Right, so did they give you a list?"

"Uh, yeah, should be in my backpack, can you find it for me?"

"Sure." I start digging through her bag trying to find the little pink post-it note she's talking about, but there's nothing. We pull up at the grocery store and I still can't find it. "It's not in here, Callie."

"You know what, you keep looking I've gotta call AJ."

"Uh, okay." She gets out of the car and calls her boyfriend; I can't find this damn list anywhere. "Callie!" I stick my head out of the window.

"One sec, what?"

"It's not in here, are you sure you put it in there."

"Come to think of it, it's probably in the car somewhere, check the glove compartment." She walks round to the other side of the car to keep talking to AJ. I rummage through the glove box and every little pocket of the car, nothing. I spend a good 20 minutes looking through everything again. Callie opens the door. "I'm just gonna go in and get whatever, just hang out here." She leaves before I even get a second to respond. She walks painfully slowly into the store, takes an age getting a cart and I can see her browsing at different cereals through the glass windows. I sit and listen to music for almost an hour before Callie finally comes back, with only one grocery bag.

"What took you so long?"

"Sorry, I got distracted." She finally starts the car and drives a normal speed until we get home, it's almost getting dark now. When we get in the house all the lights are off.

"Where is everyone?" Callie ignores me and walks straight through to the kitchen. I start to realize what's going on. I follow her and look out to the backyard; all the string lights make the garden glow. "Callie?" She takes my hand leads me outside. It's beautiful, there's a huge hand-painted banner that reads 'Happy Birthday Gracie!' in amazing typography. I can't help but love it. There's a huge crowd of people, Callie, Mariana, Jesus, Jude, Brandon, Taylor, Sophia and the Quinn's, and of course Jason. Stef and Lena must really be working late. For a second, I find myself wishing Rae was here.

"Happy Birthday!" They all yell out. Jason comes over and hugs me.

"Are you surprised?" He says.

"Yeah, I can't believe you did this for me!" I well up a little bit.

"You're not mad, are you? I knew it was risky, but I just want you to love your birthday."

"No, I'm not mad, it's beautiful, thank you." I kiss him on the cheek, still guilt-ridden. I can't believe all these people are here for me.