I wake up the next day shrouded with nerves about the date. I know it'll be fine; we get along great and I know she likes me, but I just don't want to let her down. To take my mind off of it I try to study a little more, but Stef comes into my room, looking very concerned.
"Can you come and talk to me and mama for a second?" She asks, walking away swiftly afterward. Something's happened, probably something to do with last night. I follow her down to the living room.
"Gracie, sit down," Lena says as she and Stef sit down and hold hands. I sit opposite them on the couch.
"Where is everyone?" I know Callie's at school, but the house has been dead silent since I woke up.
"They're out. Listen, Gracie, something's happened," Lena sighs.
"I figured." I try to keep the mood light, but they seem worried, stressed.
"It's about your father."
"My dad? He's dead." As soon as I say it, I realize they're talking about my birth dad.
"Your biological dad, he wants to see you." I shake my head.
"It's come to light that he was wrongfully charged; he's been released."
"No, but, Cordelia, she said he's a bad guy, why would she lie?"
"We don't know. There's an investigation going on as why he was convicted for the crime."
"What was the alleged crime?" Cordelia never told us.
"Attempted murder," Stef says.
"No, I'm not going to meet with someone like that. It's supposed to be over; I'm supposed to be getting past all that. This is my family, not him." I can't believe this. I have to stand up and pace the room to shake this out of my system.
"I know it's difficult sweetie," Lena gets up, "And you don't have to see him, but we've talked it over and we think it might be worth hearing him out."
"No, I can't, I'm sorry. He'll just try and destroy everything I've worked for." I grab my jacket by the door and leave. I can't face this. They don't follow me; they know I need space.
I just walk around aimlessly for a while. I thought the fresh air would help, but I still feel like I'm suffocating. I could talk to Callie about it, but her dad isn't a criminal. Back before I got adopted, before all of the crap started, I would talk to Sophia about this stuff. After her, there was Rachel. I feel so alone now. I have my family, I have Taylor, but no one could ever understand.
I find myself standing outside the bar where Brandon works, he's in there right now playing the piano for the lunch hour. I can't just walk in, I'm only fifteen, if a kid walks into a bar at this time, they'll know something's up. Brandon could get in trouble with his boss.
"Hey," I hear a voice behind me. "Gracie, what are you doing here?" Courtney's getting out of her car.
"I don't know, I just kind of walked here."
"You walked all that wat? Come on, I'll take you inside."
"No, it's fine, I'll just wait until Brandon's shift ends."
"He'll be on his break any minute; you can sit in the back room wait." She leads me inside, it's dark in there but I see Brandon on the little stage playing his songs. He notices me and looks confused, but he doesn't stop playing. Courtney sits me down in the breakroom, she gives me a glass of water and a sandwich. "His break starts at one, so he'll be out in five minutes," She sits next to me, "Have you been crying?" She looks at my face. I hadn't even noticed, I'm always crying these days, it's become as essential for my survival as breathing. I wipe away my tears.
"I'm fine, you know I should probably just go."
"Gracie, what happened?" Brandon comes in and sits down next to me, Courtney leaves us alone.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have come." I try to walk out but he stops me.
"Sit down." He puts his arm around me. "Talk to me."
"My birth dad wants to see me." I haven't told any of my brothers and sisters about him, I let them keep believing he was dead.
"I thought, he died?"
"It's a long story, the guy I thought was my birth dad turned out to be my Grandpa. My real dad, he was in prison, but it turns out he wasn't supposed to be. I don't know what to do."
"Have you talked to moms?"
"They're the ones who told me, I couldn't handle it, I just left."
"They're probably worried, I'll text them and let them know you're here." He pulls out his phone. "Why don't you want to see him?"
"I don't want anything to change. I'm finally happy, at least I was."
"Maybe, I don't know, maybe it'll be good for you to see him." His phone buzzes. "Mama's on her way."
"But what if he tries to mess with the adoption? He can do that; adoptions can be reversed." That would be the worst-case scenario, but my life goes from one extreme to another so it's not that far-fetched.
"Mom's won't let that happen, not unless you want it to."
"I don't."
"She's here." He looks at his phone. "She said she left just after you did, come on, I'll walk you to the car." My legs feel like jelly, my whole body does. Brandon closes the car door after I get in, he leans in through the window. "Don't worry, no decisions are being made right away."
"Thanks, Brandon," Mama says.
"I'll see you guys at dinner." We drive away.
"Why do you guys want me to see him so bad?" I ask her. "Do you know something I don't?"
"He's been fighting to get out of prison for four years, and it got a lot more real for him when he found out about you."
"He didn't know?" I suddenly feel kind of bad for him. "Cordelia said he wanted nothing to do with me. How did he find out?"
"His lawyer told him about you not long after you visited Cordelia, there's some talk that they've somehow been in contact."
"She's been talking to him?" Judging by the way Cordelia talked about him, you wouldn't think that she'd ever want to talk to him.
"It doesn't mean you have to, but if things work out, it might be nice for you to have a father figure."
"I don't want one!" I shout. "I like things the way they are, my whole life everything always changes and I'm finally happy!" I knew it was too good to be true. "I don't want a dad!" I slam the door as I get out of the car and go into the house.
All I want is to run up to my bedroom and be alone, maybe call Taylor. But when I get inside, Stef is stood in the living room with my social worker, Anita and a woman I've never seen before, Callie's here too.
"What's happening?" I ask mom, she's crying.
"Stef, honey?" Mama goes to her side.
"Gracie, this is Rita." Anita and the woman approach me. "She runs a group home called Girls United."
