Chapter 29 - Now That I'll Believe

As per usual for the weekend, Shinji stayed in bed a little longer than on a school day, but was still first to get up. Asuka wasn't up yet, and he wasn't feeling particularly hungry either, so he went to the bathroom. A shower woke him up fully, and he was all prepared to relax the day away at home.

"-use the finest selenium, tempered with ionised free radicals which exceed federal guidelines-"

"-its patented formula shields you from unwanted solicitation-"

"-I feel good knowing that no health code violation against them has actually been proven in court-"

Too bad there was nothing interesting on television again besides morning news shows hawking suspect products. Shinji turned his gaze skyward and sighed as yet another ad went on about, of all things, toothpicks. The television was soon switched off and he got to his feet. There was something that would be happening today, but it was just out of mental reach. A calendar in the kitchen told Shinji the precise date, causing his breath to catch in his throat and his heart to sink.

"Oh..." he whispered. "It's... that today..."

"What today?"

Shinji turned around, and immediately jumped in shock at the fact that Asuka, looking rather rumpled, was standing directly behind him. She'd managed to sneak up on him, focused as he was on the calendar and the one day of the year he hated over all others. He took a moment to recover from the surprise before saying, "Good morning Asuka."

Asuka tilted her head in greeting. "Morning. Ready for breakfast now?"

"Yeah, sure."

After breakfast, prepared quickly and efficiently by the two teenagers as they put their synchronisation quirk to good use, Asuka went to the bathroom for a shower while Shinji cleaned up. Echoes of the synchronisation remained for a couple of minutes, and he had to stop himself from passing a plate to the air next to him. At the same time he heard a sound from the bathroom followed by a muffled German curse, which made the corners of his mouth tilt upwards. Sometimes their synchronisation wasn't a pain in the neck outside of piloting.

Once the dishes were done Shinji headed off to the lounge room, but stopped at the calendar again. There was only one good thing he could think of about today: since he was in Tokyo-3, he wouldn't be sitting on a train for hours just to spend a minuscule amount of time awkwardly staring at-

"Gotcha again!"

"Gah!"

Shinji glared at Asuka as his heart slowly retreated back down his throat to its normal resting place, still hammering away. She was fresh out of the shower, her slightly damp hair still unbound by A-10 clips and smelling so strongly of strawberries the scent seemed to pervade the whole room. The sheer sight of her was doing nothing to slow down his heartbeat, and he silently prayed that she couldn't hear it.

"That's twice now I've caught you staring at the calendar," she remarked with a cheeky grin. "Something must be happening today, right?"

"Well... yes," Shinji mumbled. "But it's... not something to look forward to."

Asuka's grin faded, and her head pulled back slightly as she gave him an inquisitive look. "Oh? What is it?"

He shook his head. "Please... I don't want to think about it any more than I absolutely have to."

"...Alright, fine. But Shinji... remember what you said about how you'd listen to me whenever I wanted to talk?" Shinji gave her a nod. "That goes both ways. If you ever decide to talk to me about... whatever, then I'll drop everything to hear you out. Got it?"

"...Thanks, Asuka." He glanced at the clock. "I should really get ready to head out. Don't you have a date today as well?"

Asuka groaned. "Yeah, I'm really only doing it to ensure that Hikari never bothers me with trying to set up blind dates again. I'm sure nothing's going to come of this date, especially considering how obsessed the guy apparently is with me."

"Well... you never know," said Shinji. "He might not be a complete moron. So... good luck, I guess."

As he headed off to his room, he heard an amused snort from behind him and smiled slightly. While his mood wasn't going to improve that easily, because of what he had yet to go through before this day was over, Shinji's heart at least felt a little lighter and calmer thanks to Asuka's declaration. And for some reason, he actually felt relieved that she wasn't expecting the date to go well.

In his bedroom, Shinji stared at the contents of his wardrobe, trying to decide what to wear. While he'd much rather stay home and forget about the day entirely, and his father would most likely not even notice his absence, it felt like he would be giving up. Besides, this year it actually seemed like the man had started to remember he had a son. Eventually he decided upon, of all things, his school uniform. Everything else was just too casual for such a serious event as this. Once fully dressed he went over the route he'd have to take in his head, then slid open the door to his room.

XXX

In her bedroom, Asuka stared at the contents of her wardrobe, trying to decide what to wear. While she didn't have enough interest in the date to dress to the nines, she didn't care so little as to not bother at all. Besides, there was every chance that her blind date would be a pervert, going by Hikari's description of him. Eventually she decided upon a green, high-necked dress that she hadn't worn since purchasing it. Now seemed as good a time as any. Once fully dressed she double checked the address of the amusement park, confirming to herself that she knew exactly how to get there, and slid open the door to her bedroom.

She stepped out into the hall and almost smacked right into Shinji, who'd just done the same thing. They both backed up a little and stared nonplussed at each other.

"...This, uh... this synchronisation thing we have is really something, huh?" Shinji commented with a weak chuckle.

"Hah." Asuka ruefully shook her head. "Well, unless you've also got a blind date at the amusement park I don't think we have much to worry about anymore."

His expression changed to something unreadable. "...No. Nothing like that."

Surprised by his sudden mood shift, Asuka took a step closer. "If whatever you're doing today has you this unhappy, why bother going?" she asked concernedly.

Shinji averted his eyes. "It's... something I just have to do. Especially since my father will be there." His eyes slowly returned to meet hers. "...I'll see you later."

Without waiting for a reply, Shinji trudged down the hallway and out of the apartment. When the front door hissed shut, Asuka let out a sigh. She hadn't seen him this depressed since just before he ran away. Whatever was happening today had to be-

Asuka frowned, her mind whirring. Shinji was going somewhere with his father, and it wasn't for a friendly chat over lunch. Rather, it was a much more sombre affair...

Her eyes suddenly lit up and she resisted the urge to snap her fingers; clearly, Shinji was going to visit his mother's grave today. She herself had tried to keep up with that with her own mother's grave once upon a time, until it became too painful to continue. But Asuka had simply cursed at her mother's gravestone before deciding never to return, and that was years ago. Yet somehow, Shinji was constantly finding the strength to continue even when it meant being in the presence of his one remaining parent, a man who had fobbed him off onto a total stranger.

There had to be something she could do to cheer Shinji up, and if it weren't for the blind date she could have prepared something for his return, but now it would have to wait until she got back home.

Before leaving, Asuka patted the top of her head and returned to her bedroom. A minute later she exited the apartment, her signature A-10 clips firmly in place. Now fully armed, she headed off to the most reluctant date she'd likely ever have.

XXX

The cemetery stretched out over a gently sloped hill, the grave markers perfectly equidistant from each other. Shinji couldn't even begin to guess how many there were, and this wasn't the only cemetery in the greater Hakone area dedicated primarily to the victims of Second Impact. Even after all his previous visits, Shinji would have been hard pressed to remember where the grave was for his mother. Only his father's presence near the top of the hill, as unmoving as the thousands of marble markers, served to remind him of where to go. The sight of the man caused Shinji's right hand to momentarily clench around the bouquet of flowers he'd bought on the way.

The walk up the hill felt like it went on forever; the rows of markers stretching out further and further each time Shinji glanced around, until they looked to reach the horizon. Already the main cemetery gate was far behind him, yet his father was seemingly no closer.

Many graves in all the cemeteries were empty; their intended occupants lost to floods and other natural disasters, wars, or simply pronounced dead after not being seen for years. His own mother was one such victim. Shinji had no idea what had actually happened to her, except that there hadn't even been a funeral. And try as he might, he couldn't even remember much about the woman who had given birth to him. How did she style her hair? What were her favourite clothes? What did her voice sound like?

Shinji closed his eyes and exhaled sadly. He idly wondered if it was possible to strike some kind of deal with Bwynvienne, or somebody like her, to get those details. Although... what would the price be?

"Hello, Shinji."

He opened his eyes with a start to see that he was about to walk right past his father, who had not averted his gaze from the grave marker.

"You seem somewhat distracted."

"Y-yeah," Shinji reticently replied. "I was just... thinking about... her."

His father's head tilted an imperceptible fraction. "As am I."

The two Ikaris stood in silence before the marker for some time. Shinji kept shifting slightly, trying to think of something to say. His father, on the other hand, stood perfectly still with his hands clasped behind his back, not even slightly swaying.

"You haven't come here for three years." Surprisingly, the elder Ikari was the one to break the silence.

Shinji flinched in embarrassment. The last time he'd come to this cemetery, he'd shouted at his father for seemingly not caring about his mother's death before running off back to the train station. "...Did you visit during that time?" he cautiously asked.

"Of course."

"Of course..." Shinji repeated. "Meanwhile, I talked myself out of it by saying it was too far."

"But that was not the real reason."

"No. I was just... too embarrassed to come back."

"And yet now you are here."

Shinji took a deep breath. "I guess I... talked myself into it this time. I'm already in Tokyo-3, after all."

"Hrm." His father went silent.

"And I... um..." Rubbing the back of his head, Shinji decided to go for broke. "I wanted to take this time to ask you something."

"...You may ask, but you may not like the answers I have for you."

"At this point I'll take any answer over not knowing anything at all." Another breath, and then another. "Father, did you... forget anything about Mum when she died?"

Though the man's eyes were still hidden by the ever-present orange shades, Shinji thought he saw a hint of something new in them. "No, Shinji," his father replied. "Every aspect of your mother has been engraved into my mind. I could no more forget about her than I could forget to breathe."

"So then why can't I remember anything?" Shinji pressed on. "Her face, her voice, her personality... I don't know anything about Mum anymore! All I can remember is that... that I had a mother until suddenly I didn't! What happened?!"

Though Shinji's voice was rising and panicky, his father remained stoic; eyes still on the marker, until suddenly his head tilted down until his chin rested on his chest. "As I said, I remember everything about Yui. Including what happened." He turned his head to stare at Shinji. "But I will not tell you."

"Why not?!" Shinji demanded, petulantly stomping a foot.

"What happened to Yui was exceedingly traumatic," said his father. "There is only one thing I would ever wish to forget about her, and that is the circumstances of her death. I will not tell you because I refuse to make you relive that day."

The anger fled Shinji, leaving him feeling cold and hollow. "Relive... Was I... there when it happened?"

"Indeed. You ended up catatonic for a few days afterwards. I will not say any more on the matter. If you have forgotten, it is because your own mind wanted to forget."

Shinji brought up his left hand to rub at his forehead. "Wanted to forget... so badly that Mum has been almost completely erased from my mind." He chuckled once, humourlessly. "What a pair we are. Me who's forgotten everything, and you who remembers it all." The hand dragged down his face before flopping back to his side. "What about photos? Surely I could at least see what she looked like."

"I destroyed all our photos of her," his father grimly stated. "For me, it hurt too much at the time to see her face. For you, there was a chance that seeing her again could trigger a relapse."

"...So there's nothing? Nothing left of her at all?"

"No." His father hesitated, then raised a hand to point at the grave marker. "There is not even a body in this grave."

Shinji stared listlessly at the marker. So this was just another empty grave among thousands...

The sound of jet engines reached his ears; quiet at first, but growing steadily louder. Shinji looked up to see a NERV VTOL aircraft heading towards them.

"I must return to my work," said his father as the aircraft hovered over them. The downwash sent dirt and dust flying through the air around them. The man raised his voice to be heard over the machine. "The war against the Angels continues on, regardless of our own lives."

"Yeah..." Shinji looked up at his father. "But... I'm kinda glad we had this talk, even if it leaves me with even more questions."

"Perhaps one day you will find the answers you seek, Shinji." His father stepped up into the aircraft and slapped the metal hull twice. "Farewell."

As the aircraft lifted off, Shinji thought he caught a glimpse of blue hair in the passenger compartment before the door slid closed. He covered his eyes as the downwash shifted and the billowing dust tried to blind him. When the wind settled down, he lowered his arm to watch the aircraft retreat into the distance. A crinkling sound directed his attention to the bouquet still clutched in his right hand. The wind had blown some of the petals off, but the flowers were still intact.

Kneeling down next to the empty grave, he dug a shallow hole; just enough to wedge the bottom of the bouquet in while the top rested against the marker. He patted the dirt back into the hole to hopefully keep the flowers from tipping over, then stood up and brushed off his knees.

"Well..." he mused as he stared at the marker. "I suppose this visit went a lot better than the last one."

While his heart was not exactly light yet, it no longer felt like a lead weight in his chest. Shinji stuck his hands in his pockets and walked out of the cemetery, wondering if Asuka had had a better day than him.

XXX

The theme park stretched out over the landscape. Asuka couldn't even begin to guess how many people there were, but this was apparently the only amusement park in the greater Hakone area. Having never been here before, Asuka was hard pressed to work out where exactly she was supposed to meet her blind date.

The queue to get in looked like it would take forever; the line of families and couples growing more and more each time Asuka glanced over at them, until they looked to reach the end of the street.

Asuka closed her eyes and sighed in frustration. She idly wondered if she should just go home and leave the poor sap behind. She knew absolutely nothing about the guy apart from how much he wanted to date her, and that he was a third-year. At least if Shinji had been here, the two of them could have swept any shooting gallery or other such attractions.

"Soryu!"

Ah, that must be the sap in question now. Asuka turned around to see...

...Somebody who looked a bit like Shinji. He had a similarly skinny, slightly short build, and almost the exact same nervous look Shinji still couldn't seem to get away from.

"Um... h-hi," he stammered. "Were, um... were you waiting long?"

...The same hesitant way of speaking too, it seemed. If Asuka didn't know better, she would have sworn that Hikari had done this on purpose.

"Yeah, hi," she said by way of greeting. "Lemme guess, the hair gave me away?"

A quick shake of her head sent her hair twirling about; an act which caused the boy to blush just like-

Damnit, she had to stop comparing this guy to Shinji.

The boy got his face under control and nodded. "You might just be the only person in Tokyo-3 with red hair. Hard not to notice you. Anyway, you can call me Tatsuya. Nice to finally meet you face to face. Um... Oh yes." He dug a hand into his pocket and withdrew two tickets, passing one to Asuka. "I got us some express tickets so we can skip the lines."

"Nice," Asuka remarked as they headed for the express lane. "Looks like it's gonna be a crowded day."

The two of them ran their tickets through the machine to activate the turnstiles, and headed into the park. Asuka let out an appreciative whistle upon taking in the scope of the park. Just from where she was standing she could see at least three roller coasters jutting up into the sky, as well as a drop tower that was likely right in the middle of the park, a Gravitron and swing ride off to her left, and a space-themed swing ship and bumper car attraction off to her left. Various other smaller attractions for kids littered the areas between the bigger rides, along with the requisite food stands, sideshows and other attractions.

"Not bad," Asuka remarked, carefully omitting the fact that she'd never actually been to an amusement park before. The tests and training she'd had to go through in the last decade had kind of made up for it though. Besides, absolutely nothing could compare to being in an Evangelion, anyway.

"So, um... where do you want to go first, Soryu?" Tatsuya asked.

"First up, just call me Asuka. And it depends." Asuka glanced at him and raised an eyebrow. "How strong is your stomach?"

XXX

Two roller coasters and a Gravitron was all it took before Tatsuya asked to take a break, but he was smiling as they meandered along the path while his stomach settled. Asuka, against all expectations, was actually enjoying the day so far as well, and not just because she was proving herself to be tougher than a third-year boy. It did help that Tatsuya wasn't harassing her about NERV and the Evangelions. He had asked about the battles she'd been through, and she'd bragged as much as she could to a civilian, but the boy wasn't acting like... well, like Kensuke.

And so far, he hadn't tried to make a move on her. Not even so much as an 'accidental' bump while moving through the crowds. She couldn't tell whether to be insulted or not. In fact, Tatsuya wasn't even really looking at her, and not in the shy way Shinji sometimes-

Damnit.

Now he looked, his attention drawn by her low growl. "Is... something wrong, Asuka?" he asked.

"Huh?" Asuka rapidly shook her. "Oh, I... um... took one look at the teacup ride and sarcastically went 'wheee'."

Tatsuya looked over at the ride and nodded. "Yeah, that's pretty tame even for me." He patted his stomach. "I think I can handle one more real ride before we get something to eat."

Asuka nodded and steered them towards the drop tower.

Five minutes later the two teenagers, along with a dozen or so other thrill-seekers, slowly began to ascend into the sky. Asuka watched the people on the ground get smaller and smaller underneath her dangling legs for a moment before bringing her gaze up. They were already above the treeline; seconds later they were level with the lift hill of the nearest coaster and still ascending.

Asuka blinked in mild surprise. Despite the many times she had been at this height or even higher in her Evangelion, there was still the gradually building anticipation. Here, strapped to a seat in the open air, she had absolutely no control over her situation. The only thing close to this was when she and Shinji were being airlifted towards Israfel.

The seat clicked to a stop at the top of the tower, and Asuka looked out across the landscape towards Tokyo-3 as the wind whipped around the tower. Despite the constant fighting in and around it, the city still looked peaceful. Of course there was quite a bit of construction happening, more than in any 'normal' city, but still.

"Hey," said Tatsuya. "I don't remember this ride delaying this lo-"

The drop tower... dropped them.

Surrounded by screaming people, Asuka grinned at the rapidly approaching ground, barely resisting the urge to join in. With no control, this was a much different feeling than being air-dropped into combat.

Unfortunately, the ride only lasted about five seconds from top to bottom.

Once they'd passed the ride exit, Tatsuya said, "Wow! What a rush! Is that what piloting is like?"

"Something like that, yeah," Asuka replied. "Takes longer though, and of course there's something else trying to make your life that little bit more entertaining."

Tatsuya nodded, and they headed off to find some lunch.

After lunch and two more less intense rides, Asuka was starting to get suspicious. Tatsuya still had yet to even brush against her hand, or anything else even remotely romantic. Instead the atmosphere around the two of them seemed more like friends or siblings having a day out, rather than two people on a date. She wondered if things would have been like this if she were here with Sh-

God. Damnit.

Once again Tatsuya directed a concerned look at Asuka after she growled. Before he could say anything, she got in first. "Look, can we sit down somewhere and talk? I've got some questions for you."

Immediately, she noticed Tatsuya's eyes dart nervously around, as if he was looking for an escape route. And then, he let out a long, drawn-out sigh. "...Okay," he mumbled. "But... can we do it somewhere quiet? Please?"

Asuka stared at him for a moment, before nodding. A quiet spot was soon located near the first aid building, where Tatsuya slumped down on a bench and stared down at the ground. Asuka sat down next to him, and waited.

"So there's a good reason I wanted to go on this date with you," he finally said, after glancing around to see if there was anybody else in earshot. "But it's... not quite for the reason you'd expect."

"I can tell that already," Asuka remarked.

"There's some guys in my class who started bragging a lot about their... romantic conquests." Tatsuya rubbed a hand down his face. "I somehow got dragged into it, they started pressuring me about how I've never had a girlfriend, and to try and get them to leave me alone I said I was hoping to... well... date you."

"Why me?" asked Asuka. "I mean, yeah, I'm an Eva pilot and-"

"It was because you're an Eva pilot that I said your name," Tatsuya interrupted.

Asuka drew in a sharp breath. Was this just another boy hoping to hitch their wagon to her star? Another moron looking to profit from her fame? Like how Shinji had caught the eye of those two harpies in 2-A?

"I thought you were sufficiently unobtainable that I could get away with simply... well... pretending to lust after you," Tatsuya went on. "I wasn't expecting somebody else to butt in and set us up on a blind date together."

She didn't like where this conversation was going. "...Then why did you agree to it? You could have just turned it down."

"In front of those same guys?" Tatsuya finally looked up from the ground, nervously rubbing the back of his neck. "If I didn't 'jump on the opportunity', they'd want to know why. And... I'm sure as hell not going to tell them why I don't want a girlfriend."

Asuka opened her mouth to retort, but hesitated. There was something about the way he'd said that last word. "Wait... you're saying..."

His eyes went right back to the ground. "Y-yeah... it's... really something I don't want anybody at school to even consider... I'm afraid of what could happen to me."

"I'm not a Japan native, as you can probably tell. Is there something wrong in this country with... that?"

Tatsuya gave a weak shrug. "Let me put it like this," he said. "Have you actually seen any gay couples around?"

Asuka stopped and thought, but all she could think of was the will-they-won't-they between Doctor Akagi and Lieutenant Ibuki. She hadn't exactly been searching, but she was sure any such couples would have been noticed. "No, can't say I have," she finally admitted, leaning back on the bench. "So what now? We're here for the wrong reason, and that bombshell kind of ruined the mood."

"Well... ah..." Tatsuya's fingers started tapping on his knee. His face was starting to turn incandescent. "I was hoping to work up the courage to... erm... ah... do... do something," he finally forced out, "that would make you slap me. Then I could at least brag that I did that... um... something on the date. And hopefully that would have made them leave me alone."

Asuka shook her head in disbelief. The poor boy was so shy he couldn't even properly explain what he'd been planning to do. "That's kind of a stupid plan. You're trying to hide the fact that you're-" She paused while somebody walked past them. "-that you're not interested in the fairer sex by dating me, the most sought-after girl at school, and then copping a feel to get a battle scar?"

"Yeah, it's a dumb idea," Tatsuya mumbled.

"Besides, by the time Monday comes around there won't even be any evidence of me hitting you."

Tatsuya nodded, then got to his feet and started pacing back and forth for a moment. Finally, he stopped directly in front of her. "In that case, can you... um... hit me harder then?"

"Excuse me?! What, you're asking for a black eye or something?"

His eyes lit up. "Yes! That would be perfect! It'd look like I'd really... ah... tried something on you!"

Asuka blinked slowly. "...Are you sure about this? It's not exactly comfortable to get punched in the face."

"If it means I can get them off my back, I'd even go so far as to let you break a bone!"

"Whoah." Asuka put her hands up. "Look, you're a decent enough guy, I'm not about to do that unless you try and stick your hand up my dress."

For a moment, Tatsuya's eyes drifted downwards, then they immediately rose back up to focus on something behind Asuka's head. "...No. Desperate as I am, I would never do something like that."

"Well... if you're hellbent on this, I can at least give you a bruise," said Asuka, silently thankful. "It'll be much less of a hassle and you won't end up in the hospital while trying to hide something you shouldn't have to."

"Yes, that'll do fine. Um... how do you want to do this?"

It didn't take a genius, college graduate Evangelion pilot to think of a suitable plan. "Sit back down, and keep your arm behind me on the bench. I'll handle the rest. And... sorry for what I'm about to do."

"Don't be sorry for helping me," Tatsuya replied with a shake of his head. "Thank you for this, by the way."

Asuka certainly didn't feel like she deserved his thanks, as she stormed off in a pretend huff after punching the boy in the face and screaming at him in German. She couldn't even bring herself to actually swear; instead she'd just shouted the first song lyric she could think of.

Outside the park she finally slowed down and stopped. It was that or walk into a black-suited woman standing in her path.

"Pilot Soryu, is everything alright?" the woman quietly asked, to which Asuka groaned. Of course Section Two would involve themselves.

"Yeah, I just had to help a poor confused young man maintain his cover," she replied with a sigh.

"...Ah." The woman shrugged. "That's a shame, he seemed like a nice enough boy."

Asuka didn't even bother asking. Section Two's semi-permanent job was to shadow NERV's pilots after all. "He is. And maybe one day he'll be able to find another nice enough boy."

"Would you like a lift home?"

"...Sure. I don't feel like going the long way."

XXX

Music reached Asuka's ears as she got close to her apartment door. It took her longer than she'd admit to recognise both the song and its source. It was Shinji on his cello, something he hadn't even seemed to touch since coming to Tokyo-3, playing what sounded like Bach's Cello Suite No. 1.

She swiped her card across the reader and the door slid quietly open; any noise it made overshadowed by the music. Into the hallway she crept, removing her shoes and padding through the kitchen on bare feet. Pen-pen was there, sitting near the doorway to the lounge room with one of Misato's beers in his clawed flipper, and for the life of her Asuka couldn't work out how the penguin managed to get in. He noticed her and raised the can in a silent greeting, to which she gave a quick nod, spotting a couple more empty cans sitting next to him.

The song soon came to an end, to Asuka's great disappointment, but just as she was about to move into the lounge room Pen-pen put up his empty flipper to stop her. Puzzled, she knelt down next to him and watched as he made a circle in the air with a claw. A minute later, cello music filled the apartment again.

The very same cello music, in fact. Shinji was playing Cello Suite No. 1 again. It was a song Asuka hadn't heard since Shinji himself had recorded part of it for her during their penpal days. Back then, the recording had only been a couple of minutes long. And she now recalled him mentioning that the full suite was close to twenty minutes long; far beyond his skill level and longer than he could sit and play for at the time.

She raised an eyebrow at Pen-pen. He made the circular motion again, then tapped a claw on his flipper where a human's wrist would be and raised first one claw, then two, alternating between them.

Asuka pursed her lips in thought. Then, in as low a voice as she could, she said, "He's been playing the same song for the last hour or two?"

A nod.

"Like... non-stop?"

Pen-pen repeated himself.

"And you've just been sitting here listening to him?"

A shrug, then a claw raised in a genetically modified penguin's best possible approximation of a thumbs up.

"I suppose you don't know anything about why he's doing this, either."

Pen-pen just stared at her. Despite the lack of human facial features, Asuka could still clearly understand the look of 'what do you think?'. She gave a quiet huff and sat down to wait and enjoy the music.

From her perspective, Asuka couldn't see much in the lounge room besides the back of Shinji's head poking up over the couch, moving side to side. As far as she could tell Shinji was playing perfectly, but it had been a long time since she'd heard the song or even touched a musical instrument herself, and she wouldn't have been able to pick up on any errors short of a completely dropped note.

She let the song wash over her, using the music to forget about the waste of a day she'd just had. As she began to hear the same part of the song she'd walked in on, Asuka prepared to, sadly, interrupt Shinji. Getting up into a crouch, and ignoring Pen-pen's expression of disapproval, she crept up behind the couch and halted as the song came to an end.

In the sudden silence, Asuka heard Shinji let out a quiet grunt and a hiss, then a sigh. She stood up and saw that he was working his right arm around in circles while flexing the fingers of his left hand. After a minute, he raised the bow back to the cello strings, preparing to play yet again.

But enough was enough. As wonderful as the music was, Shinji was clearly using it to blank his mind, and his body was starting to suffer for it. She could even see sweat running down the back of his neck. Asuka raised her hands, silently apologising for what she was about to do, and brought them together.

The applause shocked Shinji so badly that both his hands flew up. The bow was flung behind him, whizzing past Asuka's head and flying somewhere into the kitchen. The cello, suddenly unsupported, began to topple towards the floor but some instinct made Shinji's hand shoot out to catch it.

"Whoops," Asuka quipped, while Shinji put his free hand to his chest.

"A-Asuka..." said Shinji. "When did you get home?"

"About half an hour ago."

"And... you didn't say anything?"

"Of course not. You were busy playing, and I wanted to listen. Speaking of which..." Asuka leaned forward slightly. "How many times did you repeat that song?"

Shinji's eyes darted away for a split second. "Oh, um, only a couple times."

She blinked slowly at him and folded her arms, content to let the liar dig himself deeper.

"Okay, maybe... a bit more than that?"

And deeper.

He quickly gave in. "Alright, alright, I don't know how long. I lost track."

She moved her hands to her hips and nodded. "Now that I'll believe."

"I don't think I'm very good though. Sorry if you heard me screw a bit up."

Asuka shrugged. "I'll admit I'm not a classical music expert but it sounded wonderful to me."

"Wark!"

The two teenagers turned to look at Pen-pen, who was carrying the accidentally discarded bow and giving Asuka a disgruntled look. She pursed her lips. "Okay fine, he told me how long you'd been playing for."

"Now that I'll believe."

Asuka's head slowly panned back to Shinji, a look of utter incredulity on her face. He just gave a shrug and a weak smile. "Smartass," she muttered after a moment. "Anyway, as much as I enjoyed your music, you need to take a break from it before your arms cramp up or something."

Shinji glanced down at his cello and sighed. "I suppose so," he mumbled. Weakly getting to his feet, likely suffering from pins and needles in both legs, he returned the cello to its case, retrieving the bow from Pen-pen with a nod of thanks.

Meanwhile, Asuka moved over to the control for the air conditioner and grunted in disapproval. Shinji had clearly been so intent on using the cello to forget about his problems that he hadn't even bothered turning it on when he got home. She fixed this egregious oversight, sighing in contentment as fresh air began to circulate around the apartment once more.

"Go and have a shower," she ordered, noticing Shinji's sweat-stained shirt. "While you're doing that, I'm gonna duck next door and grab something from Misato's place that'll help us both forget about today."

Cello case in one hand, bow in the other, Shinji absently nodded before fully absorbing what she had just said. "Wait, you're going to steal some of her beer?"

"I'd like to," Asuka admitted. "But I'm sure somebody-" she glanced meaningfully at Pen-pen, "-would just rat us out. No, I'm getting something else. You'll see when you get out of the shower; it'll take me about that long to set it up."

Clearly intrigued, Shinji gave a slight shrug and gingerly walked down the hallway to his bedroom. Asuka looked back down at Pen-pen again. "Pick up your empties. You're free to come and go as much as you want, but I know Misato will ask questions if she sees a beer can in our trash, and I'd rather not waste time trying to convince her they were yours."

"Wark." Pen-pen rolled his eyes as he gathered up the empty cans.

Asuka took one last glance around the lounge room and paused. She hadn't seen Shinji carrying sheet music, and there was nothing of the sort left in this room. "Hey Shinji," she called out. "Where's the sheet music you were using?"

Shinji's head popped out of his doorway. "What sheet music?"

"You know, what you were referring to while playing a twenty minute song," Asuka clarified.

He blinked owlishly at her. "I don't have any sheet music," he replied. "Besides, Cello Suite No.1 isn't a single song; it's more like several all put together." With that said he ducked back into his room.

Asuka stared down the hallway in surprise. "You're saying you've memorised twenty minutes worth of cello music. And you can play it perfectly. Yet you think you're 'not very good'?" She put her hands on her head and inhaled deeply. "Goddamn," she breathed out.

"I'm sure there's people far better than me," Shinji mumbled as he came out into the hallway with fresh clothes in his hands.

"Of course there are," said Asuka. "But they've had decades of practice, probably with expensive tutors and the like. Has anybody actually taught you how to be that good?"

"Well... no..."

Asuka walked up and poked him hard in the chest, causing him to rock back slightly. "Stop selling yourself short, Shinji. Accept that you're actually good at what you do."

Shinji's eyes flickered around for a moment, and then he sighed. "I'll... I'll try, Asuka."

Tempted though she was to quote Star Wars again, Asuka held back. She nodded and stepped aside to let Shinji continue on to the bathroom before heading into the kitchen where Pen-pen was waiting.

"Wark?"

Asuka nodded. "Yeah, I'm borrowing Misato's SNES. It's in her bedroom right?"

"Wark."

"Bottom of the wardrobe. Right. Thanks."

XXX

Shinji stepped out of the bathroom, already feeling better than he had all day. Even the semi-mindless repetition of Cello Suite No.1 hadn't fully managed to get his mind away from his mother. But then Asuka had shown up out of nowhere, getting his ass moving with promises of something else to take his mind off things.

"Damnit."

And speaking of his fiery housemate...

Stepping into the lounge room, he saw Asuka trying to squeeze between the wall and the back of the television with a jumble of cords in one hand. Pen-pen, another beer in his claw, was relaxing on the sofa watching her work.

"Need a hand?" he asked as Asuka cursed again.

"Yeah, that'd be nice," Asuka grunted. "Friggin' Misato pulled the cable apart and then shoved it in her wardrobe without tying it up properly. So of course it got all tangled up purely to waste my time. Just tilt the television away from the wall a bit so I can see where these damn plugs go."

He quickly moved to assist, bracing the screen against himself while Asuka plugged the cables in.

"Right, that's finally done." Asuka stepped over to a bag sitting on the ground, rummaging through it for a moment and pulling out a couple of cartridges. She glanced at them for a moment before shaking her head and putting them to one side as she dove back into the bag.

"What are you looking for?" asked Shinji.

"Two-player games. I'm not gonna make you just sit around and watch me play. Ah-hah." She pulled out a cartridge with a colourful looking sticker. "...Oh wait, the two player in this is taking turns."

Shinji glanced at the cartridge as she set it aside. "Gokujou Parodius," he read. "Is it good?"

"Oh, it's quite fun," said Asuka. "Problem is I'd want you to play Gradius first to get the joke, and for some reason Misato doesn't have that one. I suppose... this one will do for now." She took a cartridge out of the bag, shuffled over to the game console and slotted the game in. The game booted up with a press of the power button to a satisfied smirk from Asuka. Right away she went into the options menu and toggled a couple of settings. "Gotta have Angry Mode."

"Pardon?"

The grin on the Second Child's face was eerily similar to her expression when she was about to murder an Angel.

XXX

After a couple false starts while Shinji got used to the controls, the game was well under way. Asuka kept throwing out tips as her character, a man quite a bit skinnier than his own character who seemed to be made entirely out of steak, threw enemies left and right.

"So do you wanna talk about what happened today?" Asuka suddenly asked as her character stole a sword from a guy that looked like a genie.

"Um, what happened to forgetting about today?" replied Shinji. His character, flashing white after taking one too many hits, proceeded to piledrive the current target of his frustrations.

"Well if you really want to forget, I'll just say no more. Just thought you might like to get something off your chest." The genie man had his sword returned to him in a rather unwelcome fashion.

Well, they had both promised to listen when the other wanted to talk. And... well... it wasn't like he wanted to forget about it forever. After all, the biggest problem he had right now was that he had forgotten. "It's fine. You've definitely helped me feel better already anyway," said Shinji. He sighed before continuing. "I somehow managed to have a real conversation with my father. Well... as real as it could get between us I suppose."

Shinji told Asuka about what his father had said. That he had apparently witnessed his own mother's death and repressed the trauma of it. That his father had destroyed every picture of his own wife out of both grief and a desire to protect the young Shinji's mind.

"Huh." Asuka raised an eyebrow when he finished. "And here I thought your old man literally couldn't say anything to you besides 'get in the fucking robot'."

Shinji gave a short chuckle. It was still a surprise to him that his father was capable of actually speaking to him. But then again, he'd previously had a decade of almost no contact with the man telling him that communication was impossible. One day wasn't enough to completely change that view.

"What about you?" he eventually asked. "How'd your blind date go?"

Asuka didn't answer right away, focusing on the boss fight they were up to; a yellow-suited man madly jumping around like he was one of the Israfel twins. When he finally went down for good, Asuka took the time to speak. "Oh he was... boring. He looked alright, I guess, but there was just nothing to him."

"That's kind of a shame," Shinji replied. "But don't worry, there's definitely somebody out there for you."

A second later he thought he saw Asuka turn her head to look at him, but a quick glance showed that she was entirely focused on the game. A goon took that perfect opportunity to cheap-shot him, and Shinji hurriedly returned his attention to the game as his character flashed white and got some satisfying revenge on the goon.

Not much more was said after that. They called out enemies and tactics, but soon even that stopped as they drew upon their synchronisation. After that, even rookie gamer Shinji was nigh-untouchable. If his character was about to be stuck in an enemy's combo, Asuka would instantly charge across the screen and lay the offender out. They managed to complete the game without losing any more lives.

"Phew." Asuka slumped back into the couch. "Damn, that was good work. Wanna play another game before we start getting dinner ready?"

It ended up being three more games before growling stomachs brought a halt to the session.

XXX

Kaji halted as Misato stumbled, only able to keep her balance thanks to his swift hands. She turned and glared at the perfectly flat surface that had clearly conspired to trip her, then bent down to take her heeled shoes off. She began walking again, and her foot immediately jerked up off the ground, likely due to a sharp stone trying to bury itself in her bare foot.

"Having trouble there?" Kaji ever-so-helpfully asked. "Need me to carry you?"

"So you can put your hands all over my ass?" Misato shot back.

"Didn't seem to mind my hands too much back at the reception."

Misato grunted. "Just make sure I get home without kissing concrete. I don't need Ritsuko poking fun at me again."

Kaji ripped off a mock salute. "Aye, ma'am!"

The cool night air certainly helped. It wasn't long before Misato was able to walk mostly unassisted, and at that point they were only a few minutes away from the apartment building.

At her front door, Misato fumbled inside her purse for her keycard. She pulled a card out and tried to swipe it, but the reader beeped angrily at her. A hand reached over her shoulder and plucked the card out of her hand.

"Wrong one, this is for the kids," Kaji remarked after glancing at the card's details.

"Well since you have it now, mind checking in on them?" Misato requested as she put her card through the reader. "They might have both had bad days today."

"Sure."

Misato's door opened, and she slurred out a greeting. "'m home."

"Welcome home," came a soft reply before the door hissed shut again.

Kaji moved over to the next door, but it opened right before he could swipe the card. Misato's strange avian housemate stared at his knees for a moment, before raising its eyes to meet his.

"Wark."

"Evening."

Pen-pen glanced behind him, then raised a claw to his beak in the universal 'quiet' gesture before trotting off to Misato's apartment. Kaji quirked an eyebrow before ducking into Shinji and Asuka's apartment.

One day he'd work out just how the hell that penguin managed to operate electronically locked doors.

In the apartment, Kaji could hear talking coming from the lounge room, so he slipped his shoes off and padded stealthily through the kitchen. He quickly deduced that the talking was coming from the television, not the teenagers, and poking his head into the lounge room confirmed it. Some western superhero film was playing; a red and gold android fighting a much larger android.

Casting his eyes around the room, Kaji spotted Shinji on the couch, but saw no sign of Asuka. Slowly, carefully, he crept up behind the couch and looked over it. Only his years of training prevented him from making a sound at what he saw.

Asuka was laying sideways on the couch, her head pillowed on Shinji's lap. Both the boy's hands were on the armrest; likely because he didn't want to risk waking her up. Kaji grinned and silently retreated to the kitchen, where he 'accidentally' bumped one of the chairs before heading back towards the lounge room

"Huh?" Shinji's head swivelled around, but he couldn't turn enough to see behind him. "Pen-pen? Did you forget something?"

"Hey, kiddo," Kaji softly called out. "It's just me. Might have had just a tad too much to drink. Misato definitely has though; she asked me to check in on you two."

"Oh, hello Mr. Kaji," Shinji replied, his voice barely above a whisper. "I can't really get up to greet you right now. Asuka kind of... um... fell asleep on me."

"Oh dear." Kaji's grin grew wider. "It must be absolutely awful to be stuck like that."

Shinji's face turned red, to the older male's continued amusement. "Actually it kind of is," he said. "I need to go to the bathroom but I don't want to wake her."

"Ah, the age-old conundrum." Kaji leaned on the back of the couch. "Which is the lesser evil: a woman's wrath or a burst bladder?"

Shinji's legs twitched, and his feet crossed themselves. "At this point, Mr Kaji, I would take the wrath, but I'm still nervous about waking her."

"Fair enough." Kaji moved around to the front of the couch, kneeling down next to the two teenagers. "You really don't need to worry much. When she's like this, Asuka's practically dead to the world. You should feel lucky though."

Shinji tilted his head. "What do you mean?"

Kaji leaned back slightly and sighed at the boy's obliviousness. "Well, apart from the fact a pretty girl is using you as a pillow... Asuka doesn't just fall asleep on anybody. This right here-" he gestured at Asuka's peacefully snoozing head on Shinji's lap, "-is a sure sign that she trusts and feels safe around you."

The boy's face got even redder. "O-oh..."

"Now then..." Kaji reached out and gently cradled Asuka's head, lifting it just enough for Shinji to slip out and run as quietly as possible to the bathroom. Kaji laid her head back down on the couch, taking a moment to push a strand of hair away from her face.

The last time Asuka had fallen asleep on somebody, it had been on Kaji himself, quite a few years ago. Before then, even when she was about ready to drop from exhaustion, Asuka refused to be carried to bed; even jolting awake the moment she was picked up, no matter how long Kaji waited. It had taken quite a bit of time before she would allow herself to be carried.

It had also been something of a struggle just to get the headstrong young girl to listen to him. Asuka had always been more interested in doing her own thing, unless it involved piloting an Evangelion. He had practically had to bribe her with simulator time just to get her to behave sometimes. Which caused no end of annoyance from the NERV technicians.

"Thank you, Mr. Kaji," said Shinji once he returned to the lounge room.

"Mind helping me get Asuka to bed?" Kaji asked. "Take it from me, couches aren't as comfortable to sleep on as they first appear."

"Yeah, sure."

"Good." Kaji grinned internally. Time to see just how much Asuka trusted Shinji. "You pick her up, I'll open the door for you."

To his amusement, Shinji's face flushed bright red again as the boy took an involuntary step backwards. Shinji then proceeded to earn several points in Kaji's eyes by quickly recovering and nodding, rather than stammering an excuse as to why he shouldn't do it. He walked over to the couch, knelt down next to Asuka, and ever-so-gently slid his arms underneath her legs and back before gradually standing back up.

Asuka didn't wake up.

She continued to not wake up as Shinji practically moved in slow-motion towards the bedroom door, turning sideways to avoid hitting her head on the door frame. Kaji watched from the doorway as Asuka was lowered onto her bed and tucked in. This last minute had proven what he had long hoped for: Asuka finally managed to trust somebody else.

He stepped aside to let Shinji pass him by, and then quietly slid the door shut. "Nice work," he remarked. "Not a sound, she's still fast asleep."

Shinji wiped a hand across his brow like he had had to defuse a bomb. Which, in some ways, was rather accurate.

"So how have you two been getting along recently?"

The hand froze in midair as it was about to drop back to his side, and Shinji blinked confusedly at Kaji. "Um... g-good. Why?" he stammered.

"Let's not beat around the bush," said Kaji, leaning against the wall next to the door and folding his arms. "Do you like Asuka?"

There were a couple more blinks as Shinji processed the question, and then his face turned red once more.

"Heh, I think that answers that."

Shinji... acted just like Kaji expected. Blushing, stammering, frantic glances around the room and finally burying his face in his hands. Kaji felt slightly guilty at his own bluntness, but there was something that these two needed to start seriously thinking about.

"W-why are you bringing this up now, Mr. Kaji?" the hideously embarrassed boy asked.

"No time like the present," replied Kaji with a nonchalant shrug. "And on that note, have you thought about seeing if she feels the same way?"

"N-n-no..." Shinji, hands still firmly on his face, stumbled half-blind over to the couch and flopped down on it. "Things are just fine as they are. I don't want to... risk ruining our friendship, especially when she probably doesn't feel the same way."

'Oh you poor oblivious boy.' Kaji sighed despairingly. "You Children have the most dangerous job in the world. Tell me something, Shinji. What frightens you more: being rejected, or you or Asuka dying before you can tell her how you feel?"

Shinji's hands slowly dropped from his face, his gaze remaining focused on the floor.

"I'm not expecting an answer right now," said Kaji. "But here's a little homework from me. I want you to really think about it. Instead of just assuming the worst, look back at the time you've spent with each other. What you've been through together." He patted Shinji on the shoulder. "It's late, so you should get to bed too. Sleep on it, and make a decision soon. Before the Angels get lucky and ruin it for you."

Shinji nodded stiffly, getting up off the chair and walking almost robotically towards his bedroom. When the door slid shut, Kaji let out a breath, running his hands through his hair. All he could do now was hope that Shinji -or Asuka- would be able to overcome their hesitation and fear of rejection before it was too late. He trudged out of their apartment, intent on making sure Misato made it safely to bed before heading home himself.

XXX

In the darkness of the main bedroom, a single cerulean eye cracked open and stared at the door for several seconds before narrowing slightly.