Not time for the gym battle quite yet, but this is still gonna be an eventful chapter everyone. Here we go!

Chapter 9: Terrible Twos

"Alright Dart, you ready for this?" I ask encouragingly.

"Weedle!" Dart replies, practically vibrating with excitement even as he tries his best to behave for the Pokémon Center staff.

"Alright sir, we're going to remove the harness now." The nurse informs me. "His vitals are all perfectly healthy so I don't anticipate any problems, but I will recommend you be ready to shield your eyes. If a Pokémon has been holding off an evolution for long enough the light can be much more intense than normal."

"Duly noted. Let's do this!" I reply eagerly. Ogrim bounces eagerly at my side, one hand clinging to my pants leg as he watches the proceedings.

"You got it." She giggles, pulling out a key and undoing the lock on Dart's harness.

The moment the everstone Dart is wearing falls free the glow hits me, and I have to throw a hand up over my eyes. It's like somebody is shining a bright flashlight straight into my eyes. If I squint I can almost make out the details, the way Dart's body is shifting into a new form, but it's indistinct. His whole body is giving off that light in all directions, and it's making it difficult to really see the details of what's happening.

The sounds, on the other hand, are very clear, and that proves to be something I wasn't at all prepared for. This is one of those things I expected to be like the anime, after discovering the glowing happened just the same. But in the anime all you really heard when a Pokémon evolved was a sort of humming sound, like a rush of energy bursting free. That sound is still there, but… there's also a lot of sounds that are more… organic. Tearing, creaking, oozing… stuff like that. I can't really see Dart's body transform into that of a Kakuna, but good lord I can really hear it. The only comfort I have is that the nurse looks completely unbothered by it all. And Dart doesn't seem to be bothered by it either. If it was as painful as it sounds I'm sure I'd be hearing about it.

Finally, after far too much time spent shielding my eyes and listening to the sounds of my weedle tearing itself apart, the light fades. And sitting on the table is a kakuna.

"Goodness, he was certainly ready to go, wasn't he?" The nurse says with a beaming smile, stepping back up to the table and looking Dart over. "No sign of any problems externally. And…" she raps her knuckles experimentally against Dart's carapace, "His shell sounds very sturdy. I'll do a few more checks to make sure there's nothing wrong internally, but this looks like the definition of a healthy evolution."

"Koh." Dart grunts.

"Yes, yes, you did a wonderful job." The nurse replies happily, patting Dart on the head. "Just give it a few weeks and you should be able to fly around and battle as much as you want!"

That gets my attention. "Wait, he can't battle? I thought Kakuna can still use their attacks though."

"Well, yes…" The nurse gives me a bewildered expression, "But… they can't exactly move."

I pause at that, realizing that the nurse is currently wondering if I'm braindead or something. "I mean, I knew that, but… I taught him to move himself around with string shot. So if he can still use attacks…"

"Hmm." The nurse replies, still looking at me as if I'm a bit stupid, "Well, it's true that they can still use their attacks, so theoretically that might be doable… But I think in practise you're going to have some trouble making that work the way it used to. As a general rule Kakuna are encouraged to focus on training with the move harden rather than anything else. They can train in using it easily since it doesn't require movement, and is a very easy move to let them practise training in harnessing energy that isn't their own typing. If you're really looking to push your kakuna's training you could try teaching it iron defense, so that it can start to branch out its typing mastery faster after evolving."

I don't protest further. I'm already feeling stupid enough as it is. Looking at Dart lying immobile on the table makes it clear I wasn't thinking straight. They can fight without a problem in the games, so it just didn't occur to me. Barely even begun my journey and I'm already forgetting the lesson Bianca taught me: mobility is the most important thing to keep in mind when battling. If I hadn't evolved Dart I'm sure I could have used him in my battle against Janine, even if it would have been difficult. The little guy is already a proven miracle worker.

Now because I made a brain dead move like that I have to wait to make my gym challenge. What a stupid, easily avoidable roadblock to run my head into.

I get frustrated enough with myself for forgetting something so basic that I end up moping around until dinnertime. When Keith and Axel find out about it they can't help but laugh at it. Can't say I blame them.

"So, how are you two dealing with things then?" I finally ask, "Planning to wait until after you have a beedrill to get your first badge?"

"Ehh… yes and no." Keith replies. "I probably won't be getting my first badge until after Wocky evolves, but I'm not going to be waiting here. I'll be starting in Celadon."

"Oh?" Axel looks over curiously, "Why not start with the gym here? Surely it would be less convenient to return here later for your badge."

"Yeah, but it's worth it." Keith declares. He turns to me, "You remember how I told you I had to postpone a bunch of my plans because I caught Checkers? My starter, he's a scyther." He explains briefly to Axel, whose jaw drops at the casual reveal. "Well, one of those plans was for Janine and I to go on our journey together. Since I had to wait, she was forced to go without me. So… I'll be fighting her last. It's a poor substitute for us battling in the Kanto League, but it's the best we can really do. She'll be the one who gets to decide if I'm ready for the tournament."

"I see! That sounds very romantic." Axel nods calmly, making Keith sputter indignantly. He seems not to notice Keith's protests and looks over to me, though the gleam in his eye makes it clear he's secretly enjoying teasing the ninja, "As for me, I don't need to wait. Ibara is my third Pokémon, and my other two are far better fits for a poison type gym leader anyways. I was always planning on using Daisuke and Shizu for this battle."

"Daisuke, Shizu, and Ibara…" Keith muses, "All more traditional Kanto names. You didn't strike me as the type."

Axel only shrugs in response. "I may be from Almia, but my great-grandfather was born in Kanto. I decided to name my first few teammates in the style he grew up with. A way of paying respects to him."

"That's cool." Keith nods, before turning back to me, "Anyways, you should probably take a leaf from Axel's book. Get yourself another Pokémon. I don't think you're too fond of the idea of waiting two more weeks for Dart to become a beedrill."

"Not particularly…" I sigh, before turning to face the last of our little group. "What about you Harper? You've only got Rapid right now, right? So what's your plan for the gyms?"

Harper looks taken aback at the question. It's possible he wasn't expecting me to ask him since he's sitting at a different table from the rest of us, though he's still close enough to be well within earshot. After a moment though he recovers and stammers out a response, "Well… I don't really have one at the moment. Not taking on the gyms this season."

"Oh really?" I blink in response.

"Yeah, I uh… I'm spending a year here as a gym trainer first." He shrugs, "Just worked the details out with Koga and Janine this morning. So I can't really help you, sorry."

"It's cool. Hope that works out for you, dude." I nod, before looking back to the others. "Alright, well, you're both probably right that I should just catch another Pokémon. Maybe I should try the safari zone?"

Keith immediately shakes his head. "Not a chance. You can't get in with just a Pokédex; you need to have at least a tier 3 license as well."

"Oh damn," I blink in surprise, "Thought I was fine with just the 'Dex." Apparently the reading I've done wasn't quite good enough. I was sure I had checked the requirements properly.

"They changed the rules a few years back." Keith explains. "Turns out even trainers with the knowledge to earn one of the most hi-tech pieces of tech in the world of Pokémon research still have a tendency to do stupid shit when they aren't experienced trainers. They say it was actually Ash Ketchum who caused them to change the rules. According to the rumors he once visited the place when he was a rookie and caught nearly half their tauros population."

I can't help but laugh my ass off at that one.

"Alright Dart, try a string shot. Let's see if this works." I say, watching calmly.

"Koh!" Dart cries enthusiastically. His string of silk is noticeably weaker than before he evolved, and can't be aimed at all, simply firing out straight ahead. When it strikes the tree we're training against, he grunts with exertion, attempting to haul himself forward.

This results in Dart tugging himself forward to faceplant on the ground.

"Yeah… I guess that was about what I expected." I sigh, shrugging my shoulders. "Thought all that mad energy you're always running on might make a miracle happen, but I guess it just wasn't meant to be. You're officially benched until you've evolved again."

"Koh…" Dart moans piteously. "Koh kakoh no!"

"It's not happening dude." I shrug. "We can't fight a gym leader with you like this. Ogrim would have to do all the work himself."

"Golett!" Ogrim calls out eagerly, hands clenched in determination.

"I don't doubt you'd put up one hell of a fight Ogrim, but we're not strong enough to beat those kinds of odds yet." I shake my head. I'm pretty sure Ogrim is actually at the level he needs to be for a first gym battle, but there's no way Janine is going to just let Ogrim get away with doing all the work. "We're either waiting for you to bust out of that shell, or looking for a new teammate. Personally I kinda want to try finding a new Pokémon to catch around here."

Dart pouts a bit at that, but Ogrim looks downright giddy. In his mind 'new teammate' directly translates to 'new friend', and he is all about that sort of thing.

"Sorry Dart, I know you were looking forward to trying a gym battle, but I really want to build up my momentum in the gym challenge as soon as possible. So, in that case I guess we need to decide what sort of Pokémon we should add to the team." I look between my two teammates thoughtfully. "First thing's first, we need to make sure that whatever team member we add meshes well with how you two fight. So that means trying to fill a role that you don't already cover on the team. And… they can't be a poison, ground, or ghost type, because I'm not allowed to own two of any of those types until I've got four gym badges."

Dart and Ogrim make noises of understanding, which I'm pretty sure are complete lies. I love both of my Pokémon dearly, but these boys are not deep thinkers. That's something else to consider when looking for a new teammate, I suppose. Ogrim needs guidance constantly in battle, and while Dart has excellent instincts during a fight he doesn't seem to understand yet what he should work on outside of it. His reluctance to learn string shot is perfect example of that. So it would be nice to find a Pokémon who doesn't need me to do quite so much thinking for them.

That's more of a convenience for me though, really. It stresses me out a bit trying to call all the shots in battle, but I can still handle it for now. And as we start accumulating more and more battle experience I'm sure we'll reach the point where they can understand and handle themselves better. Dart's already getting there, the battle with Keith showed me that.

So rather than how well the Pokémon can handle themselves, I should focus strictly on what each Pokémon's role in battle will be.

"Dart, you're best suited to an evasive battle style. Or rather, you will be once you're a beedrill. Your strengths are aerial maneuverability and harassing opponents from afar until they're vulnerable to a big finisher. I think our goal once you're evolved should be to work on moves to help you wear the opponent down faster. Some better finishers would come in handy too. Ideally that'll include getting you some proper type coverage."

Dart hums thoughtfully at that.

"As for you Ogrim, I think you're best suited to becoming a front line fighter. So far we've been focusing on covering for your weaknesses, making sure they won't be crippling in a fight. I still want to work on that in the future, but for now I think we need to start working on your strengths instead of your weaknesses. Which means, well, your strength. You hit like a truck little dude, and we need to capitalize on it. Let you get better at really getting in the enemy's face and hitting them as hard as you can."

Ogrim pumps his arms in the air eagerly.

"So we have aerial harassment, and a straightforward bruiser… That leaves… well, a lot, really." I muse, pulling out my Pokédex and looking up what sort of wild Pokémon live in the area. "There's all sorts of roles left to play here. Tanking, support, ranged attacker, sweeper, status effects and debuffs, glass cannon… I mean, none of these are necessarily mutually exclusive, but still, we have lots of jobs left to do. And that's without considering type coverage on top of all that…"

I mull on it for a few minutes more before making a decision. "Got it. We'll play it by ear." Ogrim and Dart stare blankly at that, clearly having expected something more definitive from me. I can only shrug at their surprise. "I'm serious, okay? We have too many options right now. When you have this many gaps to fill it's better to just take things as they come."

Dart lets out an unsatisfied hum at that, still not feeling particularly convinced, but Ogrim adjusts quickly. It doesn't matter what I decide on, my starter is happy with it. Just like in battle Ogrim is happy leaving the big decisions to me. I'm definitely going to need to work on strategy with him at some point. So far the only thing Ogrim seems to take his own initiative on is providing emotional support. The little dude is a master of good vibes.

"Alright, so here's the plan. We're going to train like before, but we're going to try to be more mobile about it. We'll try moving in a big circle around Fuchsia, practise moves as we go, and see what kind of wild Pokémon we can find as we move. Dart, I'll get you to start with harden. It's a real basic move, you're infusing your skin with energy to make yourself more durable. If you can master it it'll be incredibly useful even after you've evolved. You'll be focusing on evasion when you become a beedrill, but when things go wrong being able to guard with harden could make the difference between getting knocked out and powering through."

"Koh." Dart grunts, immediately focusing on the move. Poor guy seems to be a lot more frustrated since evolving. I think he was hoping as much as I was that he'd be able to keep bungee launching himself around the battlefield after evolving. For such a gung-ho little guy to be stuck immobile for weeks must be torture for him. Hopefully he doesn't figure harden out too fast. He needs some sort of project to work on so he doesn't go crazy, and there's only so many new challenges I can think of to give a Pokémon incapable of movement.

"As for you Ogrim, I've got two new moves for you to try learning. We'll start you on one now, and move to the other once I need a break, alright? First new move: shadow punch. It's like astonish, but rather than letting it explode out of your body with a big movement, you focus your energy into your hands and release it with a punch. Since the power is concentrated in one place it hits much harder, you see?"

"Golett!" Ogrim replies eagerly, throwing a few punches to show how ready he is to get started.

"Alright, so first thing's first, we're going to walk around the wilderness here, and while we move you're going to start by practicing focusing your ghost energy." I nod to Ogrim, pick up Dart, and start moving. "And as we go we'll see what sort of Pokémon we can find!"

Our first day of wandering proves eventful in the worst sort of way. The Pokémon we can find around Fuchsia are apparently mostly birds. Spearow and fearow to be exact. A species whose huge, sharp beaks are apparently very well suited and in fact primarily designed for tearing through bug Pokémon shells to get at the soft tasty insides. Bugs much like the one I'm carrying, as it happens.

Things get harrowing for a bit. I run more than I've ever had to run in years, Ogrim learns a lot about punching flying Pokémon out of the air, and Dart leaves the situation more determined than ever to master harden. Before another fucking buzzard tries to make a meal out of him.

I return to the gym at the end of the day feeling the most exhausted I've been since my first night in this world, back when I was trying to dodge questions from Unova's law enforcement half the damn night. Keith, being a shithead as always, laughs his ass off at me. Axel looks amused himself, but manages at least a little sympathy, saving me some dinner while I clean the feathers and bird crap out of my everything.

But despite that disastrous first day, I quickly manage to settle into a routine from there. I start to make my way slowly around Fuchsia city, spending each day walking, examining every wild Pokémon we come across that isn't a spearow, and coming home to the gym each night. Dart masters harden quickly and moves on to trying to master iron defense, a much more difficult move to learn. Meanwhile Ogrim figures out how to concentrate ghost energy into his hands, and starts to work on releasing it at the right moment when he throws a punch.

My fellow trainers begin to make their own strides forward as well, and it quickly becomes clear that in terms of progress I'm already falling behind. Keith sets off to Celadon three days after the test results are in, setting out on his journey at last. A couple of days after that, Axel takes on Janine but barely loses due to a narrow miss by Daisuke, his rhyhorn.

I pause my training to watch the rematch two days later, and am not surprised when he wins handily. Despite his calm demeanor Axel is a brutal battler, using overwhelming force applied with ruthless precision. He's got a sharp mind beneath that unassuming face, and access to a much wider variety of Pokémon due to having studied for a tier 3 license before starting his journey. It makes me glad that I never had to fight him in the sponsorship challenge.

I manage to catch up with Sara and Harper's progress while we watch Axel's team run rampage, all three of us having taken a break to watch his battle. Sara tells me she's waiting to sort out some family business before she can leave Fuchsia, and won't challenge Janine until then. Harper meanwhile, is studying to get a tier two license so he can let Rapid fully evolve into beedrill. The poor guy is stuck as a kakuna until Harper has the license to get that everstone taken off for good.

Harper's situation definitely puts things into perspective for me. A tier one trainer has to either take the written exam or win their first gym badge to make the jump to tier two, and with just a kakuna the latter option is all but insurmountable. I find myself acutely aware how similar my own situation could be if the Magic Bureaucrat had started me off with a tier one license instead of a tier two. I wouldn't have even been able to catch Ogrim if not for that bit of generosity.

Not at all a pleasant thought. I've only known Ogrim for a couple of months and if anything happened to him I'd kill everyone in Fuchsia and then myself.

…Or more likely, I'd get two steps into an attempted killing spree before Koga handed me my ass.

At any rate, everyone seems to be moving forward, while I'm stuck waiting behind. Even Sara is doing better than me, having a full team to work on while she deals with things, while I have just two Pokémon, only one of which is currently ready for a gym.

Progress is slow but steady for Ogrim and Dart, matching our gradual trek around Fuchsia City. I find all sorts of interesting Pokémon, see lots of cool sights, and take things at a very casual pace, making sure not to miss any potential members to add to the team.

There's very little good prospects in that regard though. Lots of spearow and fearow, which are both completely avoided and solidly on my ban list after the fiasco day one. Plenty of nidoran, which I desperately want but can't catch due to the restrictions on poison types. The occasional slugma hanging out in rockier areas, which are obviously a heavily restricted Pokémon for capture due to being made out of fucking lava. Not interested in studying for a tier five just to train an oversized slug, thank you very much. Leave that to the type specialists.

It isn't until we reach the southern end of the city, where the air is thick with the smell of the ocean and the ground gets sandier with every step I take, that I finally find something interesting.

"An exeggcute." I note thoughtfully, watching the little cluster of seeds hopping along cautiously nearby. "Must have wandered out of the safari zone a while ago. You're a long way from home."

"Golett?" Ogrim asks interestedly.

"Yeah, sure. They've got a lot of support moves, plus some good type coverage for the team. Let's go ask if they're interested."

"Go! Golett goooooo!" Ogrim whoops excitedly, taking off into a run. Or rather, an unusually fast waddle.

"Whoa there little dude!" I cry out in alarm. "Don't get too carried away, you're going to spook them!"

"Koh kakoh." Dart grumbles, not carrying much for the sudden jostling as I jog after my starter.

"Sorry Dart, gotta make sure Ogrim doesn't do anything too dangerous though." I wince.

It takes me a bit longer than it probably should to stop Ogrim from running too rampant, and by the time I catch up with the excitable little guy we're practically on top of the poor exeggcute. "Ogrim! Buddy! Slow it down for a sec! I know you're just excited to make friends but that doesn't mean that we should-"

A sudden explosion of green dust hits me in a wave, cutting me off. I look towards the exeggcute to see it frantically hopping away, one seed pod looking back to keep a wary eye on me as it flees.

"Wow, rude." I complain, "I know Ogrim was coming on a bit strong there, but he was just…" I feel myself growing dizzy and place a hand against the tree. "Whoa, head rush. I… what was I saying? Right. He was just… trying to… make…"

I pause, looking down at Ogrim. The little golem is suddenly lying on his back, lights growing dim. Looks like he's falling asleep… oh.

"That's… not… good." I groan, falling to the ground as the sleep powder fully kicks in.

I'm woken up from my sleep by a loud screeching sound. That should be alarming, but due to being drugged by an overly skittish grass type it still takes me several long, disorienting seconds before I really register what's going on around me. I push myself to my knees, spit the sand out of my mouth from when I face planted, and start looking around blearily. How long was I out? No way of knowing for sure, I didn't exactly pay check the time before that damn exeggcute sprayed me.

My head is still feeling kinda fuzzy, but I force myself to take stock of my surroundings all the same. Ogrim is still dozing at my side, but I doubt he'll be out for much longer. Powder moves don't tend to be as effective on non-organic Pokémon, probably because they don't have lungs. I'm surprised I woke up before him, honestly. Hopefully Dart is doing alright in the mean… time…

Dart isn't here. I was holding him when I fell, so he should be on the ground right next to me. A jolt of fear rushes through me, cutting through the fog in my head as I scramble to my feet. "Dart!" I shout, looking around frantically.

"Koh!" I hear Dart's voice reply from behind me, sounding equally frantic. When I turn to look I see why. There's a doduo attacking him.

"Oi!" I yell, torn between horror and fury. "OI, YOU GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM MY BUG YOU CRAZY FEATHERWEIGHT!" I jab Ogrim with a toe, nudging him awake, before rushing ahead. "OGRIM! ROLLOUT!"

Ogrim responds groggily at first, but after a moment seems to realize what's going on and yells in alarm. The little dude rolls past me a moment later, letting out a wild warcry as he goes to save his friend.

One of the doduo's heads looks up to watch as Ogrim and I charge in, and lets out a disgruntled huff. It squawks something to the other, which jabs at Dart even harder. Dart takes it like a champ, body gleaming with a silver energy. Looks like his desperation has pushed him to the point he needed to figure out iron defense in a hurry. But I doubt he'll hold out for much longer. Type weakness is type weakness after all; that peck attack is surely doing a number on the poor guy.

Ogrim reaches the big feather duster in time to stop it though, driving it away from Dart before his defenses can give in. I pull Dart's Poké Ball out in a hurry and use the opening to recall him. "I gotcha, bud." I murmur in relief, before looking back to Ogrim. "Alright bud, Dart's safe. Now let's show this dumb bird what happens when you mess with our team, huh?"

"WAAAAAAARK!" The doduo heads screech indignantly, glaring at me furiously.

"Well that got a reaction!" I blink in surprise, before grinning at the doduo maliciously. "What, upset that you got your food stolen? Or are you just mad about the 'dumb bird' comment?"

"WARK WARK!" The left head shrieks again, looking furious. The right one is taking a moment to cough after presumably straining its vocal cords the first time, but it still gives me an absolutely furious glare. These two are prideful. A pair of very proud and vicious girls, if my memory of how doduo neck colors work is correct.

"Tough shit, ladies." I call out, watching the two of them closely. "If you think I'm going to go easy on you after you tried to eat one of my teammates, then you have another thing coming. You want to get a meal from me? You'd better earn it."

Left head smirks confidently, which is I guess a thing beaks can do in this world. Right head just glares at me, still coughing a bit. They certainly look like they're ready to go, even if one of the heads seems a bit sick at the moment.

I'm starting to think these two might have potential.

"Ogrim, most of your moveset won't work against these two. Stick to pound and rollout for attacking, and defense curl for defending." I order, watching the girls warily.

"Golett." Ogrim nods, watching carefully. He's in for a tough fight. Our best attacks won't do much of anything to a normal flying type like doduo, but the same isn't true at all for them. I really wish I had some idea how to train Ogrim to phase through normal and fighting attacks right now.

Oh well, no point dwelling on it. "Alright Ogrim, attack!"

"Go! Go! Golett!" Ogrim cheers, running forward.

"Wark!" The doduo reply, rushing forward to meet him.

The two don't meet in the middle, since the doduo easily outspeed Ogrim, but this does little to throw off the little golett's timing. Ogrim lashes out with his hands just as the doduo jab with their beaks, and comes out far better in the exchange, meeting them head on and knocking them for a loop.

"Good job Ogrim! Now close in and get some body shots in!" I encourage, watching as Ogrim easily bats the doduo's attacks away. He's getting really good at handling attacks from the front, thanks to all his time training against faster opponents. And the payoff for that practice is made clear when Ogrim moves in, shrugs off a couple of peck attacks, and sends the opponents staggering with a good hit to the gut.

The doduo croak in pain as they stumble back, but recover enough to gain some distance before Ogrim can follow up. The blow has them shaken, but definitely not out. Which is fine by me. I'd have been disappointed if that was all it took to beat them. Ogrim stands on guard, knowing now that he can't catch up to them, and the two heads take the opportunity to mutter to each other.

For a moment I think they may be strategizing with each other, but then they simply flex their legs and rush in again. Testing an idea maybe, or perhaps they simply don't care to change strategies? They act far more cautious this time though, hopping back whenever it looks like Ogrim is about to go for another gut punch.

If they're hoping to outlast Ogrim like that though, they're going to be disappointed. Ogrim doesn't have muscles to wear out, and he's stopping them from hitting anything important with their beaks. At this rate Ogrim could fight all day.

But as I watch, feeling confident, things start to shift. The blows Ogrim deflects are starting to come in harder and harder. Their attacks begin to push the golett back. And all the while the doduo are only growing more intense, more focused, more enraged…

Oh shit. "Ogrim, rollout away, now!" I call out in alarm. "Stop hitting them and back off!" Rage, they're using rage! I should have realized! The move lets a Pokémon hit harder and harder every time they take a hit, which means that they're increasing in strength every time Ogrim punches them in their dumb beaks!

Ogrim takes a couple of nasty looking attacks, but manages to curl up and roll away. The doduo watch a moment, smirking at me as if to say, 'what, you finally noticed?' before giving chase.

Cheeky birds. I'm definitely going to be making a serious attempt at recruitment when this is over with.

For now though I need to come up with a game plan for actually beating them. I can't rely on Ogrim outlasting anymore, since he can't fight the doduo's attacks off without boosting their power. And it's damn near impossible to land a big hit because they're too fast to pin down. Which means… I need to get them in a position where they won't be able to dodge. Catch them off guard somehow…

"Ogrim, head for the beach!" I direct, "And dial back on the rotations!"

"Golett." Ogrim makes a confused noise, but follows my directions immediately all the same. He turns smoothly towards the beach, and begins to slow his roll a bit. The doduo don't seem to know what I'm planning, but they don't let the chance slip them by, moving in and striking mercilessly with their beaks now that Ogrim is slow enough for them to hit.

They manage approximately three good hits before Ogrim reaches the beach, and suddenly the trail of dust Ogrim is leaving turns into a heavy burst of sand. The doduo screech in surprise, before collapsing into a battered, disoriented heap.

"Now Ogrim, climb on their back! Uhh… gently, please!" I amend hastily, not wanting to risk Ogrim getting too careless.

Ogrim turns around immediately, spinning smoothly to a stop at the doduo's side and clumsily pulling himself on top. Little dude is not a climber, but he manages to get up without doing any serious damage to his opponent.

Only left head manages to respond to the unwanted rider, turning back to screech indignantly in Ogrim's face. The right head has started coughing again, choking on dust. The doduo tries to get its feet under it and lift itself off the ground, but that's much easier said than done. Ogrim weighs more than I do, I know from experience that even standing him on his feet is a monumental effort. Lifting him completely? This doduo is strong but there's no way that- oh dear god it's starting to stand up. "Ogrim, pound attack!"

"Golett!" Ogrim's blow to the doduo's back proves enough to disrupt their attempt to stand up, and he takes that as a cue to start punching in earnest,

"Wark! Wark! WAAAAARK!" Left head shrieks furiously as she attempts to climb to her feet or peck at her rider, but can't put any effort into the attack due to the terrible position. She can reach Ogrim just fine, but can't get enough momentum behind her beak to actually hurt him. Meanwhile right head is coughing harder and harder, and drooping lower to the ground…

"Ogrim, stop." I call out, approaching cautiously as I watch right head worriedly. He keeps swinging, unable to hear me over left head's screeching. Right head coughs again and I see purple tinted saliva leaking from her mouth. "Ah shit, BOTH OF YOU COOL IT!"

Left head and Ogrim hear me that time, and turn in surprise. I gesture to right head with one hand, grabbing my bag with the other. "Hey leftie, your other half is having a rough time of it. We need to put the fight on hold until I can deal with this."

Left head turns to face right in alarm, and squawks nervously. "Kweh? Kweh!?"

"Easy there!" I wave my hands placatingly, getting left head's attention. "I think I know what's causing it." I close in and look right head in the eye. "Dart got you, didn't he? My kakuna? Shot a poison sting right down your throat while you two were trying to eat him."

Right head nods in humiliation and I grin in spite of myself. "Ha! Even as a cocoon my guy doesn't miss. Well, you're in luck. I happen to have with me today… these!" I pull out a package of dried pecha berries. "Ta-dah! Pecha berries! The gym gave me plenty of these. Yeah, you're really lucky. Neither of my Pokémon can really use these, so I almost refused to take them. Good thing I let my paranoia call the shots."

I toss a couple of the berries to right head, then pull out my water bottle. Left tries to put up a fuss when I move closer, but an irritable snap from right shuts her up. Right pecks at the berries, then lets me pour water in her mouth. "Sorry about the mess." I say sheepishly as I watch half the water get everywhere but where it's needed. "My water bottle isn't exactly designed for birds."

"Wark." Right head croaks at me, clearly done giving a shit about any of this.

"Fair enough." I shrug. "That gonna do the trick for you? I could give you another berry if you'd like."

That draws interested looks from both heads, and after a moment of thought I decide to toss them each a couple. Why not? Dart can't really be poisoned, and Ogrim can't eat berries. There's really just taking up space in my bag right now. The girls clearly have a fondness for sweets.

Ogrim climbs down from their back, clearly sensing as I do that the fight is over. He walks around the two heads, looking to be sociable again. "Golett?" This friendliness is met with a jab to the head from left head, who still seems to be bitter. "Leeehhh!" Ogrim yelps in alarm, tumbling onto his back.

I start forward angrily at the unprovoked attack, but right head responds first, jabbing at left and snapping irritably.

"Wark!" Right squawks.

"Kweh!" Left shrieks, looking surprised at the chastisement.

"Waaarrk." Right says warningly.

"Wark!" Left protests.

"Wark wark." Right replies definitively.

"…Kweh." Left concedes sullenly.

The two get to their feet, grabbing Ogrim with one of their feet. And with only the slightest grunt of exertion the two pull Ogrim back upright. And once the little guy is back on his feet the two keep close, Right giving Left an expectant look.

"…Wark." Left says reluctantly, unable to resist Right's 'done with this shit' expression.

Whatever it is Left says causes Ogrim to perk right up again. "Golett!" Ogrim says eagerly, raising his arms.

"Wark." Right cuts Ogrim off, clearly not interested in hugs even if she's no longer looking for a fight.

"Golett." Ogrim lowers his arms sadly, shuffling his feet and staring at the ground.

Right and Left stare at Ogrim for a second, before Right lets out a despairing sigh. "Kweeeeeh… wark. Wark!"

Ogrim bounces happily and moves in for a hug. New friends acquired. The girls don't exactly look thrilled with the hug, but clearly Ogrim's overwhelming charisma broke through their defenses.

Paving the way forward for me. Just as I'd hoped. Mwah ha hah. "Well, since you three seem to be getting along so well, I have a proposition for you ladies." I say, looking between the two of them. "How would you like to join my team?"

"Wark." Left says flatly. Right nods in agreement. A clear rejection, but I'm not ready to throw in the towel just yet.

"Hey, let's not answer too quickly." I wave my hands placatingly. "I realize we all didn't exactly get off on the right foot here, but you should at least think about it. I think we have a lot to offer each other! You two are great battlers, but I can help you become even better. The two of you could become amazing if you joined my team. Even more than you are already!"

The flattery earns me only a flat look, so I change tactics quickly. "Look, I can tell you're doing well for yourselves out here. But you saw how well I was able to fight back with my team. Dart managed to give you a ton of trouble even while stuck in a cocoon, and Ogrim almost had you before we had to stop the fight."

The two scoff, clearly unimpressed, until I hit them with the big guns. "I got Ogrim to his current level in two months." That earns me some interested looks. "Yeah. You heard right. Two months. He wasn't exactly weak when we first met mind you, but compared to where he started he's leaps and bounds ahead. Tell them Ogrim."

"Golett!" Ogrim nods, then launches into a long, excited explanation that I can't begin to interpret. It seems to have the girls interested though, their eyes shifting between myself and Ogrim as he continues his story.

Eventually, Ogrim stops flapping his arms and concludes with a big nod, before looking back to me. "I hope that's gone a long way towards convincing you." I say. "I'm not experienced enough to really understand much of what Ogrim just told you, but I do know this little guy is no liar. So what do you say? Feeling a bit more interested?"

"Wark." Right says coolly.

"Wark wark." Left continues, a gleam in her eyes.

Ah, they are interested! It looks like we've officially entered the haggling phase. Thankfully, I know just the thing to settle this deal. "I haven't mentioned the best part yet, you know." When they lean in curiously I nod, lowering my voice. "Yeah, there's one other thing I haven't brought up yet. The food."

That really gets their attention. "Yup!" I say with a smirk, "In case Ogrim didn't tell you, I recently earned myself a sponsor. A real big shot, too. He goes by the name Koga. One of the strongest trainers in the region. And since I impressed him, he helps me out with all kinds of stuff. Training facilities, a place to live, and of course, food. Real good stuff. Those berries you liked so much? Those are from him. He's practically got a whole orchard of berries at his gym! And that's just a start."

The two give each other gauging looks, clearly mulling it over, and I push forward. "So, what do you think? You'll never have to struggle for a meal again with me, and you'll get stronger than you could possibly imagine! And all you have to do is help me kick some ass."

A moment passes in silence, before right gestures to the side with a "Waaaark." The doduo walks a short distance away and the two heads immediately start talking in hushed voices.

"What do you think Ogrim? Did we convince them?" I say quietly.

"Golett." Ogrim shrugs. Fair enough. The boy gave out a hug. He's done all he can. It's out of his hands now.

After a couple of minutes the two heads seem to agree on something and walk back to the two of us. They look at me and Ogrim, look to each other, nod, and look back to me. "Kweh."

Ogrim throws his hands up and cheers, bouncing in place. Which nicely clears up my confusion as to what 'Kweh' means in this context. "Well, alright then!" I grin broadly. "Happy to have you two. Welcome to the team!"

Once the girls are captured properly I end up heading straight back to Fuchsia, both to get my team looked at and because I'm out of water now. After that I move on to the most important matter of all when somebody adds a new member to the team: nicknames.

This is my greatest challenge as a trainer. Naming a doduo is not something to be taken lightly. Each head has its own personality, its own likes and dislikes. And you have to find a fitting name for each of them while making sure to keep to a cohesive theme. And those names and that theme have to work for your doduo while also leaving room to add one more name when the time comes for evolution! Anyone who gives a damn about naming things properly can tell you that this is a herculean task.

The names I decide on in the end are Cleo for the right head, and Lacy for the left. The names won't quite be fitting until there's a third head to complete the set, and even then I've tweaked things enough that I'd be amazed if anyone could figure out who the girls are named after. It's… yeah it's honestly a bit messy, but the girls seem to like it, so I will take it. There was far too much workshopping to get to this point as it is.

Once the two have names though, I finally take the time to properly introduce them to my other team member. I walk out of that introduction coated in as much silk as the kakuna can produce, which isn't much compared to his time as a weedle, but is still a serious pain in the ass to clean up.

All things considered, he took the news rather well. And hey, some people say a bit of tension between teammates is all part of being a Pokémon trainer. So in a way this is just part of the process.

Next part of the process is making sure I get the gym badge without any other roadblocks getting in the way.

Surprise new team member! Or I suppose that should be team members! I was debating whether I should introduce Cleo and Lacy before or after the Janine battle for a while, but since we just had a huge challenge dedicated solely to Dart I decided in the end to have him sit this first gym badge out and bring the girls in early.

Consider figuring out where I got the names Cleo and Lacy from to be a challenge to all of you readers. I think it'll be difficult for people to figure out, especially since you don't know what the third head is gonna be named yet, but I'm interested to see if you guys can surprise me.

I'm sure the day will come when I find myself regretting having the girls speak only in chocobo noises, but right now I'm feeling very proud of myself.

I think I'm going to take a moment today to give another shout out, for yet another Pokemon writer on the Treehouse Discord. This one's for my buddy Cavik, and his fic Underdogs. The story is making a strong start, and his team has a unique concept that I find very cool. He updates a lot faster than me, so if you're looking for a good fic to keep you occupied in between chapters of Throne of Mud then Underdogs is a great one to pick up.

We also have many more fics from a bunch of different fandoms on the Fanfiction Treehouse Discord Channel. discord .gg/9XG3U7a