List of oneshots part 4

chapter 21

Yui fights against Class 77-B before they can run wild.

Series: Danganronpa

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We find ourselves at the Hope's Peak Academy, a place meant to nurture and help those with great abilities...with the place on fire and in chaos with the students killing each other around the outside, while in one of the classrooms is where we find class 77-B. They were discussing their attack strategy.

"So first, Peko and Fuyuhiko strike here, at the northernmost part of town!" Said Fat Togami, AKA The Ultimate Imposter. "There you two will lead together a small army to help spread despair more easily."

Fuyuhiko pulled out a phone. "Hey! Tell the boys it's time to mobilize! Northernmost part of town!"

"Next! Nekomaru! You, Akane and I will attack the Western most part of town!"

"Our fighting spirit will tear them all apart!" boomed Nekomaru with a grin while smashing his head through a desk.

"Yeah!" Then they fist bumped! Chest bumped! Then were about to have sex but then-"

"Can you horny pigs wait till after we've taken over the world?" Asked Hiyoko.

"Yeah, if you're patient I'll give you guys the strongest aphrodisiacs ever." Said Mikan.

"Oh quit being stuck ups." she smirked smugly. "Too shy to watch how some real fucking gets done?"

"They have a point. We're in the middle of planning our attack." Said Fat Togami.

Akane pouted.

"Next, Komaeda and Gundham, you will attack the southernmost part of town!"

"Why must I, Gundham Tanaka, Supreme Overlord of Ice, go with this foolish man?" He then pointed to Komaeda who was in the corner, back towards everyone.

"Is he jacking off his penis with a bagel again?" Asked Kazuichi.

"I'm afraid so."

"Hope, hope, hope, hope..." He moaned.

"Oooookay, next for the western most part of town, Kazuichi, you, will be taking Ibuki, and Mahiru to attack that part of town meanwhile Sonia, you will take Teruteru, Hiyoko and Mikan to assault the center of town!"

"It will be a glorious massacre."

Then Teruteru turned to Komaeda. "Hey, you done with that bagel? I'd like a turn with it!"

"All...most...HOOOOOPE!"

The other students winced and cringed as Komaeda painted a wall white like his hair.

"Ah...ah...ah...ok...now I am." Then he tossed the bagel to Teruteru.

"Masturbate on your own time! We must attack now!" Said Fat Togami.

"Fine, but I better have a lot of time afterwards!"

"Now class, I'm sure you'll have plenty of time for that." spoke up Chisa with a smile.

"What about me?" Said Izuru, in a low and unsettling voice.

"Y-you're our back up Johnny Youn-er Izuru Kamakura." Said Fat Togami.

Knock knock

The class turned to the door and saw it open, revealing one of the many faceless students who was panting.

"I...need to...tell you all!"

"What happened?"

"A man...of monstrous power is coming...to stop you all..." he groaned before dropping down and showing numerous stab wounds on his back.

"Looks like you may need my help." Said Izuru.

"In a little bit. Everyone, be on your guard out there." Said Fat Togami.

"I could try and see if I can get some pictures." suggested Mihiru.

"He won't stand a chance, but then again, neither will I when I let him step all over me and my genitals for the sake of hope." Said Komaeda.

"I'm gonna show him what my music can do when it rocks the roof down!" ceered Ibuki while strumming several chords, only for it to go quiet as they all heard another knock at the door.

"Is that another dead Junko fan?" Said Chisa.

"Someone go check it." spoke Hiyoko looking at Kazuichi.

"Don't look at me, look at my metal pal."

"I don't wanna look at your vibrator."

"I meant look at my little robo friend!" Then he pulled out a remote and a robot walked around from behind Kazuichi.

"Metal Kazuichi's got this covered!"

"I'd like the metal vibrator if you got one." Said Teruteru.

The class all saw the robot move over to the door and grab the handle, only for it to fall down and right on top of it.

"Lucy I'm home!"

They all looked at the man who stood before them.

"And you are?" Asked Izuru.

"C-could you b-be...B-beyonce!?" Asked Teruteru.

"Ha! Beyonce wishes he was me." chuckled the figure who was cloaked in nothing but a black...cloak. "No my children, you may call me the most handsome, daring, sensatiable, charming, sexiest, hot, cute, intelligent, breathtaking-"

"Just get to the point already!" Said a man in a green shirt that had the word "wild" on it, black pants and socks and sandals.

"Ow! You don't have to karate ch-hey, this is my story, what are you doing here Trahzo?"

Trahzo said nothing as he turned and stared at Gundham.

"Another intruder in our sacred area?"

"Hey there guys, gals and whatever the real gender of this imposter is...I am Yui, king of the sex gods." posed the figure with a smile. "And crack pairings."

"Excuse this guy's mentality, I'm pretty sure whatever force created him, dropped him when he was a baby."

"How did you both get in here!?" Said Peko, pointing her sword.

"I decided to drop on by and see the class that was gonna go on and fuck up the world, on my own." spoke Yui while looking at Trahzo.

"I heard there was a powerful creature master, so I decided to break in." Said Trahzo.

"Fine, go play with Edgy Dr. Dolittle, but if you get in the way of me when I'm disciplining these students, I'll introduce you to Invankov."

"Alright alright, have fun kids."

"Kill them, especially the flamboyant man! Kill him and then Mikan you revive him and then we kill him again!"

"I'm gonna lurk in the shadows and watch this massacre with a video camera." Said Trahzo.

"Now kids, let's be calm. After all, we need to hear his reason first before showing him despair."

"Okay...talk..." Said Kazuichi, as he got a robot ready to attack.

"Ok, I'm gonna be frank. I know what you all become, what goes down, and I came to see if I could talk some sense into you all." spoke Yui calmly. "I know what you all are like. Are you really gonna let that hot, sexy, but demented bitch Junko warp your minds? Is this something Chiaki would want? Don't forget it's because of Junko she was killed, and you ALL saw that."

"But then she'll have me or her sister Mukuro send another one of these people to their death." Said Izuru.

"He's right, we must do this or we'll see another one of us die!" Said Fat Togami.

"Now take this! Miley Cyrus!" Then Teruteru threw iron barbeque skewers.

"Miley what?" Yui caught the skewers and then Akane ran at him and tried to kick him! He quickly bent his spine back, watching her fly over and crash into the door before he put his spine back together. "Damn, no underwear."

"Can't have sex with me when underwear's in the way!" Then Nekomaru picked up Yui, threw him in a locker, closed the locker and then proceeded to flatten said locker!

"He's dead!"

"Alright, back to-" Then Fat Togami took a sweet potato pie to the face!

"I don't die that easily." Said Yui.

"It's true, I've put so many bullets in him, I'm surprised his body isn't made of bullets at this point." Said Trahzo from the shadows.

"Trahzo!"

"Okay everyone, my turn." Said Komaeda. "Please, step on my worthless ballsack with these high heels, use me as a stepping stone towards hope."

Then Peko shoved him out of the way and started swinging her sword!

"A sword ain't worth shit against these!" Yui pulled out pistols from his sleeves and shot at her.

She was swift, dodging all of the shots!

"Yeah, you can do this Peko!" Cheered Fuyuhiko. "Show this idiot what you got!"

"Small breasts?" Yui guessed, making Peko narrow her eyes and lunge at him, stabbing him through the chest. "Ow! What? What'd I say?"

"Peko's boobs are bigger than you think, I should know..."

"This is unfair, why is everyone getting laid besides me!?" Complained Kazuichi as he walked up to Yui.

"Hah, you want some of this or you wanna get laid?"

"Depends, you wanna touch my socket wrench?" Then Kazuichi got a boot to the face! "Dammit, that pick up line never works!"

"Now then." Yui grabbed Peko by the sides of her head and slammed their foreheads together, sending a ringing sound in her head and making her fall back and hold her head while the sword was still in him.

"Fucking ow dude!" Shouted Kazuichi.

And then Ibuki jumped into the fight, firing off powerful soundwaves from the amp connected to her electric guitar!

Yui looked up and rushed over to the teacher's deck for cover. "Now, ear plugs activate!" He shouted from behind the desk.

"Hiding ain't gonna do shit for sound!"

The desk blew up but not Yui, but that's when he got punted by Nekomaru!

"AHHHHH!" That's when the airborne Yui was assaulted by Giant Condors!

"Attack him my winged allies! Make him regret the day he challenged us!"

"Oops, I tripped over, and fell on Akane, who fell on Fat Togami, who fell on our teacher, who fell on Sonia, who fell on a cardboard cutout of Chiaki, who fell on Gundham." Said Komaeda as dazed Gundham couldn't command the condors therefore ending the assault.

"Ha! Your birdbrains ain't got shit on me!" Yui then got to the floor and ice punched Hiyoko!

"Oooooh, that was nasty!" Shouted Kazuichi. "But oddly funny, glad I got that on camera."

"Don't...post it...online..." Hiyoko threatened.

"Awww." he let out, only to find Yui tackling him and pulling him into a headlock. "Hey, let go!"

"Don't worry, you won't die, you'll just be my human meat shield."

"Meat sh-" Akane came in with a drop kick that hit Kazuichi square in the face.

"He's kicking our butts!" Said Fuyuhiko before pulling out a phone. "Get me as many of my men as you can!"

"Hiya!" cried Yui who chucked the mechanic, knocking Fuyuhiko down. "See? Even a desperate mechanic can find love, with another dude." Then Yui took a wrench to the forehead! "Ha! I've gotten hit on the heads too many times to feel any pain from that!"

Then Izuru finally stepped in, hitting Yui with everything he had! Since Izuru is the Ultimate Ultimate, he hit Yui with Ultimate Martial Artist skills, Ultimate Gunman Skills, Ultimate Swordsman skills, Ultimate Wizard magic, and Ultimate Spy skills!

All of which caused massive damage to his cloak and shredded most of it, sending him crashing and making a hole through the blackboard. "Damn...it's impressive that you've done this much to me." he remarked while stumbling, only to grin as his form repaired itself. "But that's merely a flesh wound compared to what I've been through."

"Regeneration!?" They all gasped.

"Damn right mothafuckers!" he laughed while his body seemed to ripple and twitch. "What's wrong? You feeling despair or loss of hope? I'll bet Junko would be soaking wet to see those expressions."

"Noooooo!" They all shouted before they all jumped at once at Yui!

'Damn, you really got them going.' Said Trahzo who was recording the whole thing.

Yui laughed while they all tried punching and clawing at him, only for his form to start shifting. "Oh, you wanna play rough? Then let's play rough." He sprouted iron vibrating tentacles!

"Holy Joe Zeija!" Gasped Teruteru.

"Boo references I don't get!" yelled Yui as the tentacles lashed out and grabbed four hamsters.

"No! My 4 Dark Devas! Grr...Mirage Golden Hawk Jum-P, cast ice lance!"

"I shall now squeeze them like squeaking toys!" laughed Yui before squeezing the hamsters, before they literally let out squeaks each time.

"Huh? Hah, that's hilarious."

"No!"

"I'll save them!" Then Akane rapid punched Yui's crotch!

"Ooooh~" He moaned in pleasure. "I came from that."

"Allow me to try!" Then Nekomaru grabbed Yui's buttcheeks and ripped them off in one go!

Only for them to repair right away.

"Huh!?"

"Surprise bitch!"

"My turn!" Then Mikan impaled Yui with a needle and pressed the plunger, injecting him with cyanide!

"That won't kill me either." Said Yui. "If anything, I can inject something into you and you'll be twitching, and it ain't poison~"

"With my ultimate meditation, I've gathered enough Ki energy, everyone stand back." Said Izuru who then fired off a giant laser! "Don'tsuedon'tsue haaaaaaaaa!"

Yui saw it come at him and looked at the readers before pulling out a sign that read 'mommy' before getting consumed by the laser.

"Mind if I add more juice?" Then Kazuichi had a robot fire a laser that combined with Izuru's, making it even bigger!"

"Oh my Britney Spears, you may actually win!" Gasped Teruteru.

"End this plebeian!"

After 10 more minutes, the laser pewtered out and there was a huge charred hole in the classroom.

"We did it!"

"And Yui's atoms should reform in 3...2...1..." said Trahzo.

"I'M BACK BITCHES!" he cried, reforming while decking the ultimate coach and mechanic in the solar plexus. "And I am pissed." Then he snapped his fingers.

Then an unholy primal roar was heard.

"What was that? That was no animal!" Said Gundham.

"Oh it's an animal alright, but one you won't be able to keep from slaughtering you all. At first I debated on whether or not I should try and save you all, but...yeah, all the hits to the head convinced me to go the easier way."

That's when a bear claw with pig skin punched through a wall.

"What in the world is THAT?!"

"Manbearpig, Al Gore's arch nemesis."

Then the monster burst through the wall, revealing itself and then with one swipe, Hiyoko's face looked more like a fleshy unplanted farmland before she fell to the floor lifeless!

"Get it!"

"Oh! Oh! Quick, camera guy, do a whole lotta shaky cam, I'll flicker the lights on and off to make it like a bad B-horror where they don't exactly show you the gore."

Then Yui and the cameraman did their things as the kids charged Manbearpig!

"Die you abomination!" Shouted Fat Togami.

"Will you stop flickering the light? I'm trying to get a good shot!" Shouted Mahiru.

"Oh my, it seems you have not only tore off my arms, but also brutally castrated me and tore off my h-" said the severed head of Komaeda.

"There he goes!"

Akane and Nekomaru tried, but Manbearpig's overwhelming strength slammed their skulls together so hard, they exploded!

They kept fighting as Yui started making ghost moans.

"Where is that bas-"

Then Manbearpig raised Gundham into the air before dropping him on his human knee!

"I've been...broken...my Dark Devas...before I lose consciousness...run..." he groaned out before going limp as the hamsters squeaked out in horror and sadness, before the large creature eyed them with hunger.

Izuru Kamakura then used his Ultimate Boomerang Thrower to distract Manbearpig, giving the hamsters time to escape.

But to no avail! It then killed Chiza, Fuyuhiko and Peko in one swift slash!

"Nooo!"

"Oh look, I've come back from the dead somehow, must be thanks to my Ultimate Bullshit. Oh look at that, you've stabbed your claws into my chest and tore out my heart, and now you're eating my heart, and I die again..." Said Komaeda.

'Does he ever shut up?' wondered Yui.

Eventually, the last one standing was Izuru, as he accepted his fate, sat on his knees, awaiting Manbearpig's final blow.

"I suppose my time has come."

"You sure this one's gonna die?" Asked Trahzo.

"Of course, wh-" Then a hard uppercut sent Manbearpig rocketing to the ceiling because of Izuru's Ultimate Demon Slayer talent.

"Sike! I was pretending to give up." He said with his Ultimate Prankster talent. "Now...time to show you my Ultimate Godkiller talent."

"Oh right...he's the Ultimate Ultimate." Said Yui. "This might not turn out like I thought. Hey, instead of killing me, maybe you can go home and jack off to porn?" Yui said while waving his hand.

"Ultimate Jedi talent, you won't convince me to do anything."

"Damn it!"

"So...what are we gonna do?" Asked Trahzo.

"I have an idea, HEY LOOK, MIND NUMBINGLY STUPID MEMES!"

"Where?!"

Then the memes swarmed Izuru, causing his intelligence to fall at a rapid pace.

"Uh...what's an Ultimate Ultimate again?"

"Perfect! End it Manbearpig!"

Manbearpig, lodged in the ceiling, got himself free! He roared out and charged at Izuru. And then he tore Izuru in half, and roared!

"Good boy!" cheered Yui. "Who wants a biscuit?"

"So what now? Is Junko next?"

"Nah, I came and did what I was supposed to do." spoke Yui with a sigh. "I know what happens to them in canon, but this will help lower the spread of despair in this universe, for the time being."

"So we leaving now?"

"Yep."

"I'm disappointed I didn't get to do much besides make a home movie outta this."

"Don't let it get you down, come-on, Cynthia's gonna love this home movie."

Both of them turned and walked off while unaware that Junko was waiting outside, tapping her foot.

"When are those guys gonna blow up the classroom?"