Part 3 of 3

Day 1 of the newest and latest tourist attraction dawns with perfection, true paradise for one and all with a few exceptions but they're wearing their 'game faces' so it's all good. The shiny brand new bus with proud driver Perse awaits outside 'Pierre's Bistro', it's engine idling like a big purry cat as the first load of murder-fans finish their beach gourmet lunches.

Fidel, Juliette, and Rosie are on guard, taking up all the available space around Richard where he sits so resplendent in suit, tie, and brogues. It's a full load of 54 people but only some are tourists. The majority are locals who just want to find out how he does it.

Magic or logic?

The crowd bids adieu to Pierre and are whisked off for a quick tour of the Commissioner's office for a mellifluent welcoming speech. The prominently displayed 'Please Donate For A Better Sainte-Marie' box does a brisk business then everybody re-boards the bus for the long awaited visit to the crime scene.

And first in line is Suzy Parks by special personal invitation, loaded down with a satchel of diagrams and maps and notes, ready and willing to jump in with corroborating first-hand knowledge, if needed. This inaugural trip will be to the Lavender Estate and 'The Mystery of the Locked Steel Door!' Richard stands at the head of the bus, getting Fidel to outline the emergency call that came in that fateful night, much to Rosie's delight.

"That's my daddy!" she warbles loudly then points to Richard, "And that's the Specker!"

Richard takes his cue and the mic to outline the sequence of events on the fateful night Charlie Hulme was shot. Once he's done, everyone feels like they're ready to solve the case.

Suzie Parks pipes up immediately, "Inspector? You didn't mention how you were new to the island and suffering from culture-shock, near heat-stroke, lost luggage and…"

He pauses briefly, "Ah, yes, indeed. I suppose my own situation was vital to how this case played out," and adds for the benefit of his audience, "As Miss Park was so good to point out, I was severely jet-lagged and more or less thrown into the Caribbean to sink or swim and…"

Within seconds Miss Park is interrupting again and within minutes she has taken over the narration, people hanging on her every word as they get off the bus. Richard gradually falls to the back of the crowd with his honour guard, nodding and agreeing with Suzy as she leads the agog crowd into the grand Lavender home.

Fidel mutters, "Sir, I don't remember half the things she's telling people. Is all that true?"

"Yes," Richard asserts, "she seems to have memorized the case." He turns an eye onto Fidel, "What I'd like to know is how she found this all out? Either we have a mole in our ranks or…"

"Or…" a loud bossy voice calls from beneath the flowered straw hat at the head of the crowd gathered outside the 'safe room', "… this case was solved so impressively that the Texas Institute of Criminal Profiling published an exhaustive analysis of the thought process that went into unraveling all the clues in their monthly publication 'Profiles in Criminal Profiling with Special Emphasis on Deductive Reasoning'."

Everyone looks from Suzy to Richard then Suzy again as she gives Richard a disapproving look, "For which, sadly, Inspector Poole declined to be interviewed as he's a very private man and does not seek notoriety. Fortunately for everyone here today, I've studied the publicly available records and I'm confident that my understanding of the Inspector's investigative thinking is correct. I'm sure DI Poole with correct me if I'm wrong on any aspect of the case."

As it turns out, Miss Park's understanding of the case is spot on, up to a point. Later, as the group tours the station and take turns locking one another into the cells, Richard murmurs to Fidel, "How fortunate that she didn't find out about Camille popping up from behind my bed."

"Yes," Fidel murmurs back, a sleeping Rosie akimbo against his shoulder, "that would open up a whole new line of questioning, wouldn't it?"

Juliette smirks, "Well, I can tell you it led to quite a lot of discussion at La Kaz." This is met with alarmed eyes from both men, especially Fidel who is now wondering if perhaps he talked a little too much about his new boss at home. Juliette sees this then hastens to add, "Not that we talked about it much, Inspector, just a bit of ribbing at Camille since you two seemed so… so…"

"So unsuitable?" Richard suggests, turning his wedding ring contemplatively.

"Er, yes, sorry," she mumbles then brightens up, "Still, you managed to work everything out and here you are, a permanent resident, a local hero, married, and expecting your first child."

"Yes," Richard gusts low, "and if our child is half as delightful as Rosie, I'll be a happy man." This pleases Fidel and Juliette as they once more attend to Miss Park's amazingly accurate presentation of Means, Opportunity, and Motive at the white board as per the fascinating mind of one Detective Inspector Richard Poole… with the enthusiastic assistance of Officer Myers and the excited doodlings of the tour group.

After the white board is hopelessly scribbled in, Dwayne sidles up to his boss where he rests out on the veranda and mutters, "Itsa good thing you bought a case of those Jumbos, everyone wants t' keep one as a souvenir. Weird, hey?"

Poole sighs, "No weirder than this whole concept of murder as entertainment."

Dwayne crosses his arms, "Aw c'mon, Chief, everyone loves a good whodunit."

Poole nods as people begin filing out onto the veranda, "Only on the television, Dwayne, and only with dummies for bodies and no actual gaping wounds." He smooths down his tie, "It's time to stroll down to La Kaz for supper and let Camille see I'm still in one piece."

Dwayne eyes the crowd, "Yeah, I noticed. Here, you go first, I'll guard yer back an' then Fidel kin escort you the rest of the way. It looks like this tour idea is a winner."

Over supper, brisk negotiations result in Miss Park agreeing to take over the rest of the tours if Richard agrees to attend the lunch and supper but no drinks or dancing involved – 'I only drink tea and I only dance with my wife, sorry.' Everyone has a super time at La Kaz where DI Poole proves faithful to a fault by declining all non-Camille offers to dance and escorts his wife home at the stroke of 9 pm, leaving behind a very tired but mostly satisfied group of tour members.

"After all," the Commissioner concludes later that night as he relates the entire day to his wife over midnight champagne on their veranda, "who can argue with 'The Texas Institute of Criminal Profiling' and the 5 BRMs? Not me and certainly no one who gets within 10 yards of Miss Park."

He takes a meditative sip then adds, "You were perfectly correct about that young woman, by the way. How did you know?"

Cecile merely smiles, "Did she agree to lead the tours?"

"Yes, indeed, she did. It seems being a tour guide to a murder scene is almost as good as being an investigative officer. Miss Park is most chuffed."

"As am I," Madame Commissioner chuckles, "as am I." She falls silent but the night is loud with her thoughts.

"Please, my love," the Commissioner murmurs, "let the man rest now. The murder tours will go on for years. Most of today's participants have already signed up for the next one. His child is due any day and that will take up whatever scant time he manages away from the station." Another sip, "He also agreed to attend the lunch and supper, which surprises me. Let's not lose that advantage, neh?"

Cecile sighs, "Yes, all right, I think we've abused his good nature long enough, don't you? Frankly, I'm surprised he cooperated at all. He's truly a changed man, wouldn't you say?"

Selwyn huffs a laugh, "Oh, yes, I would indeed. Paradise has a way of changing a person."

They sip their champagne and watch the moon rise, full and round and fecund, to shine down on an island well satisfied with itself and all those on its shores.

END