"This is Stanky Dog comin' to you on the hottest day of the summer! Unless you live at the beach, I say take it easy and do nothin' today. Yup, just find yourself a shady tree, and maybe an aquatic mammal of some sort, and blow the whole day off."
Reese rolled her eyes at that. She let her spoon drop back into her bowl of oatmeal, watching it sink down under the oats.
Zara was in her lap. If you didn't know any better, you'd think she was smiling in contentment. Reese knew that Zara loved this heat- Reese would rather S'winter come early.
"Quit being smug." She scolded her snake, mildly.
She tapped on the cobra's belly. Zara only did the cobra equivalent of purring. Reese rolled her eyes.
"Spoiled brat." Reese mumbled. The show of annoyance was ruined by the smile on the corner of her lips. She dug the spoon out from the oatmeal, finishing off the food in a rush. "Well back to work. There's only so much time a girl can waste on breakfast."
==W&R==
Reese walked toward the Flynn-Fletcher house. She'd worn her swimsuit under her clothes, deciding to say if anyone asked that she expected either a pool or a waterslide from the Flynn-fletcher boys on a day this hot. It would work.
She saw a flyer floating in the breeze. She leapt up to catch it, thinking it was someone's lost paper. To her surprise it wasn't a flyer or document, it was a BOGO coupon.
For sand.
Not fun colorful sand that you could mold like Play-Doh.
Normal beach sand.
'Buy one truck of sand, get two free! All sand must go! My wife won't let me live my dream of starting a sandcastle real estate business.'
Reese pushed it into her pocket. She walked the rest of the way to the house.
She came just as Candace was walking back into the house. Phineas and Ferb were playing in a backyard sandbox, using the hose to create the ocean.
"We're gonna need more sand." Phineas commented. "Hey. Where's Perry?"
"Hey boys!" Reese greeted. She waved the coupon in the air. "Heard you needed some sand?" She handed the coupon to Phineas.
He read it over. Ferb glanced over his brother's shoulder, keeping the hose aimed at the sandbox. Phineas grinned. "Yeah. That'll do it."
==W&R==
Twenty minutes later, they had gotten their trucks of sand. Reese had signed the contracts allowing them to take the sand. Phineas was signing a landscape contract that would let them use the nearby lots for the beach. Zoning permits too- Reese was certain those were important.
"Aren't you a little young to be a landscape contractor?" The contractor asked Phineas.
He handed back the signed clipboard. "Yes, yes I am." He replied.
"Hi, Phineas." Isabella greeted, dreamily to Phineas.
Reese moved on to direct the trucks to where they could dump the sand.
"Oh, hey Isabella." Phineas greeted.
"Whatcha doin'?" Isabella asked.
"Building a beach. Check it out." Phineas showed Isabella into the backyard.
"Drop!" Reese yelled.
The trucks started pouring out the sand. Ferb continued working a giant sprinkler to create the 'ocean'.
Reese grinned proudly.
"Can me and the Fireside girls be lifeguards?" Isabella asked. Reese's phone rang. She answered it. "We need to earn our Aquatic-Safety badges."
"Sure." Phineas agreed.
"Phineas!" Reese called. The redhead turned to her. "The truck with the beach stuff is here!"
"Awesome!" Phineas cheered.
==W&R==
Before long, they had the beach set up to perfection. Reese still wasn't sure how Ferb found a water fountain that looked like a dolphin. Phineas had spread the word from the radio to let people know about the beach.
"The wet-ski's are setting up, the smoothie bar is too, and the surf boards you rented are available. However the authentic luau experience will be coming in ten minutes." Reese informed Phineas. "They want to know if it's safe to light a fire on our beach."
"As long as they follow safety procedures, I don't see why not." Phineas stated.
Reese nodded. She texted that to the party.
Candace stormed over. Her phone was in her hand.
"Welcome to our beach." Phineas announced to the Fireside Lifeguards.
"Hah! You call that a beach?" Candace laughed. She thought it was about the sandbox. Reese lowered her sunglasses to give Candace a look. "This is WAY below your usual standard. This isn't even worth a call to mom."
Ferb held up a button. Without looking away from his sister, Phineas pushed it.
"You know, if you guys ever want to be popular, you're gonna have to stop playing in sandboxes." Candace was stopped by a beach ball hitting her on the head. "Hey!"
Reese gave a thumbs up to the Fireside Girl that had thrown it.
"So Candace, what do you think?" Phineas asked innocently.
"That's it! I'm calling Mom." Candace warned, foreboding as she held up her phone.
Reese would've stayed to hear more, if she didn't have work to do. She walked out onto the beach, accepting a call. "Reese Martin, how can I help you?"
"Hey! This is Stanky Dog!" The radio announcer cheered over the line. "You wanted us to set up at the second hut?"
"Yes! There's a sign with your name on it. I'll be there in just a minute." Reese replied.
"This is a rocking beach! How come I haven't seen it before?"
"Fences." Reese excused.
==W&R==
The crowd had gathered at the beach. Age groups all over- kids, teens, and adults. They all came to party at the Flynn-Fletcher beach.
"Let's get this beach party started!" Phineas announced.
Music started blasting from Stanky Dog's hut. Reese smiled in delight. She walked over to the smoothie bar they'd set up. She hummed along to the summer songs playing, enjoying the mango smoothie.
It was so relaxing. Reese could understand why people liked the beach so much. She herself didn't enjoy it- too much sand. She thought it was actually a funny joke that she was the one to find all the sand!
She was on her third smoothie when Backyard Beach started. She looked out on the beach, seeing Candace dressed up as Queen of the Beach. Reese shrugged before hopping off her seat.
"Listen up people and I'll teach ya 'bout Phineas and Ferb and the backyard beach-a!" Ferb rapped. Reese nodded to the beat, still drinking a smoothie. "Every morning, Phineas, he gonna say (Say!) 'Brother, whatcha gonna do today?' Now you see we're having fun, playing under the sun, and get in line, get in line, 'cause the wet ski's running!"
Reese bobbed her head. It made her hair fly about.
"A backyard beach, a backyard beach! Nothing's outta reach, we got the backyard beach!" Ferb rapped on. "You can change in the broken hut, drink out of a coconut-"
Reese held up her drink. She let out a loud cheer. The beach crowd cheered with her.
"Three games for a token, but the rest is free! You got skiing, parasailing, surfing and a-flailing, your contacts need saline or else, you can't see." Ferb rapped. "Got the backyard beach, a backyard beach. Nothing's out of reach, we got the backyard beach. Got the backyard beach, a backyard beach! Don't fall into the breach, got the backyard beach!"
"I've never been happier in my entire life!" Candace cheered as she danced with Jeremy.
Reese laughed. She finished off her smoothie. She decided to get some time in the water before Doofenshimirtz blew up the beach.
==W&R==
Reese spat out ocean water. She gave her head a hard shake, getting the heavy dampness out. Reese was glad to be out of the water. She shook her head again, trying to get out all the salt water. Why they'd decided salt water instead of literally any of the other kinds of water Reese suggested, she'd never know. Authentic beach experience, was what Phineas said.
She'd just come out of a rinse-off shower they'd added when she heard it.
"Surf contest!" Stanky Dog announced.
She walked to the sign-up table. That was Phineas' job, they'd decided when they decided to make the contest in the first place.
As she walked up, she saw the neighborhood bully there too. Buford stood in front of the table with a smug grin. "Out of my way, Dinner-bell." Buford commanded, bragging.
"Hello, Buford." Phineas greeted with no politeness. "Perhaps you missed the sign." He pointed to the side.
Buford turned to it. Reese pointed at it, not hiding the grin on her face.
"'No Bullying, No Yodeling'?" Buford read off.
A Yodeller- who happened to be walking by- scoffed. "I don't like this any more than you do."
"If you actually attended those yodelling classes, you'd have a chance." Reese reminded him. They'd added the rule after they found out he wasn't a professional yodeller like he said. Nah, he was just another amateur. And the only thing worse than yodelling was bad yodelling.
The Yodeller had nothing to say to her. He turned his nose up, leaving the beach.
Reese figured that's what he had to say.
The competition started not long after. Reese watched from the beach. She listened, lowering her sunglasses as the sun started to set.
"First up in the surf contest is Bobby Nelson. Oh! And Nelson eats it on five-footer!" Stanky Dog reported. "And there's Django Brown shooting the curl, and here comes Buford Van Stomm!"
"We told him to get off the beach!" Reese growled.
Isabella sighed at her side. She shook her head, hands on her hips.
"Ohh! He pummels Brown with a Philadelphia traffic stomp! And now he's got him in a Half-Nelson, now a Full-Nelson, oh! And now he's actually beating him with Bobby Nelson! Here's the scores from our judges."
The judges- thankfully- gave Bufurd a bad score. Including a fraction. They hadn't been allowed to give 0's.
"And Buford doesn't like it one bit."
Buford threw Bobby Nelson at the judge that gave him the fraction.
"Next up is Phineas Flynn, and it's great to see a young surfer show such confidence." Phineas was reclining on the surfboard, just chilling. "Uh-oh, what's this?"
Buford tackled him. How he missed the surfboard beside, complete with Phineas and holographic projector tripod, Reese would never know.
"Oh, those kids today and their holographic projections." Stanky Dog remarked.
Isabella cheered loudly.
Reese chuckled at the enthusiasm.
"He's in the pipeline, now he's hangin' ten! He's hanging twenty! He's hangin' thirty-two! Now he's just hangin'! The crowd loves it! I don't think there's a name for that!"
Phineas was running on the surfboard- making it do cartwheels in the water. Anyone who's tried that with a board knows it'll pop out. His surfboard launched him in the air, flying towards the crowd. Luckily he had such a great crowd out there.
"The crowd is doing the wave, and Phineas is surfing it!" Stanky Dog laughed, impressed at the skill. "Let's go to the judges. 10 to the 5th power, infinity, and oh! It seems Phineas Flynn's radical surfing has made judge #3 re-think Einstein's theory of relativity! Cowabunga, laws of nature!"
Reese gave Phineas the trophy. He accepted- holding it up high for the crowd to see. Everyone cheered again. Isabella looked like she had actual heart eyes.
==W&R==
Candace got a call from her mom. In a panic, she left the beach.
Reese took that as a sign to pack up.
Before she got the chance, a large formation pushed it's way out from the middle of their ocean. She stared at it, lowering her sunglasses. The volcano was a lot taller than she expected it to be.
"Is that a volcano?"
"I didn't order one of those." Reese turned to Phineas. "Did you?"
"Maybe Ferb did." Phineas excused.
Before anyone could check with Ferb, the volcano erupted. Only instead of lava spewing from the top it was-
"GNOOOOOMES!" Stanky Dog yelled. One hit him in the face. "Oof!"
"DITCH THE BEACH!" Reese yelled.
The crowd screamed. In panicked droves they rushed away from the beach.
"Run for your lives! It's gnome-ageddon!"
"Who's protecting our gardens?!"
As the gnomes fell, they destroyed a lot of the stands and huts stacked around the place. Reese ran towards the backyard. She dodged two gnomes that were aimed at her head.
The gnomes stopped spewing out before anyone could get hurt. The volcano collapsed on itself. It was as if someone flipped a switch from 'blow' to 'suck' on a giant under-ground vacuum. It sucked the 'ocean' into it, taking the sand and the destroyed remains away.
Reese was proud she'd collected the profits they'd made today before this all happened.
Perry the Platypus crawled out from the hole made by the absent volcano. He walked up to his owners.
"Oh, there you are Perry." Phineas remarked.
Perry chattered.
"Well everybody, looks like that's all for today!" Phineas announced to the crowd.
They cheered his and Ferb's names. The brothers, Isabella, and Reese walked back into the backyard. The fence was raised to block the sight of the beach.
"That was great." Phineas praised.
Reese said nothing to confirm. She'd enjoyed the day. It was better than the beach days she'd had in the past. Even the lawn gnomes hadn't ruined it.
"Hey, boys." Their mother greeted as she walked into the backyard.
"Hey, mom." Phineas greeted. Ferb waved.
"So how was your day at the beach?" Linda asked, glancing at the sandbox.
Candace rushed into the backyard. She was clearly somehow half way to panic. "Wait, wait, my kingdom...my Jeremy...it was all so beautiful...!" She turned to her brothers, eyes wide. "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY PARADISE?!"
Their mom put her hands on Candace's shoulders. Isabella went over to help. "Candace, honey, I think it's time to get you out of the sun for a little while." The two of them guided a stunned Candace inside.
"I think she had fun." Phineas commented.
"Totally." Reese nodded. She handed Phineas a metal box. "Here's anything we made today. I already set aside the money for the surfboards and the luau- it's all labelled. Everyone else volunteered. You guys know what to do with the cash?"
Phineas nodded. He handed the metal box to Ferb. "Yeah. Whatever we make tomorrow is gonna be awesome! Thanks for your help, Reese!"
"No trouble." Reese waved off.
The two brothers went over to their tree, reclining under it. Perry joined them, relaxing with the air of a job well done.
The radio flared to life.
"Stanky Dog here with a special shout-out to my two new pals, Phineas and Ferb, for hosting a beach party that was hot, hot, hot. And speaking of hot, slather on the sunscreen listeners, cause tomorrow's weather calls for another scorcher."
"With a slight chance of scattered lawn gnomes." Ferb commented.
Phineas laughed. Reese did too as she left the backyard.
==W&R==
She made it home after sunset. Her hair had dried, same for her swimsuit. She threw on her normal clothes before walking inside.
The house was empty. Reese wasn't sure if she was upset by that or not. She set about making herself dinner- mac n cheese an easy go-to.
A quick check to her room showed Zara still chilling. She went up to the cobra, letting the snake crawl up her arm. Reese pet the snake's head.
"Did you have a good day?" Reese asked as she walked back to the kitchen. The pasta was just coming to a boil. Zara hissed. "Yeah, I bet you did. Everything was hot today. The boys made a beach. I found a coupon for trucks of sand. Can you believe some guy's dream was to own a sandcastle real estate business? It was weird, Zara, really weird."
Zara hissed.
"I knew you'd get it." Reese stated. She took the pasta off the stove, moving it to the sink to be drained. She made sure not to lean in- the steam was hot.
Before long she finished up the dish. Reese scarfed it down. Occasionally stopping to talk to Zara, mindless chatter to anyone else. Reese kept up this chatter as she cleaned up her dishes.
A car pulled up to the driveway, after 8 pm. A full hour after Reese came home.
Reese rushed off to her room before Mr Martin could come inside. She didn't want him seeing that she'd let out Zara.
The cobra was resting around her shoulders. Reese could feel a tension not unlike when one was about to strike. She reached up, brushing carefully on Zara's head.
"It's okay." Reese whispered. The door to the house opened. Reese set about getting ready for bed. "It's alright- he's not gonna know. That's the last thing any of us want, yeah?"
The cobra gave no reply.
Reese had to accept that as just how snakes said yes.
She lowered her snake into her tank. She had it set perfectly when footsteps came from up the hall.
The door to her room swung open. Reese stood still, her hands clasped behind her back.
Mr Martin glared into the room. Reese could see his eyes were bloodshot, and he'd clearly been somewhere with low air conditioning cause his work shirt was stuck to his body in sweat. He smelled awful too. Reese knew what sweaty men smelled like- she'd grown up around plenty when she was Morgan. Mr Martin smelled like sweat and beer.
He sniffed. His bloodshot eyes moved to the tank. Maybe some part of him suspected that cobra had been let loose in his house. Or maybe he saw how the cobra was glaring at him.
Reese stayed silent, but alert. She would be ready to dodge should Mr Martin do anything untoward.
Mr Martin sniffed again. A sneer of disdain was on his face as he marched out of her room. The tension on Reese's body didn't leave until he made it to the living room, the sounds of the TV playing confirming that he was settled for a long while.
She let out a small breath. With that handled, she got the rest of her nightly ritual in place.
As Reese dashed about the room, Salazara couldn't help but watch. The poor child hadn't even been surprised to come home to an empty house, for having to make her own dinner instead of having one made for her. Worse yet her owner had looked ready for an attack with Mr Martin walking in. The cobra wished that Reese would let her out- just for a quick bite. Sure, Carl would write her up but there was a good excuse.
Reese tucked herself into bed. "Good night, Zara." She turned off her bedside lamp. The glow from the heat lamp was the only light in the room.
Salazara hissed at her owner. She wouldn't let anything happen to Reese- not one chance. She had to play it safe, though, just like Reese was. Right now all Salazara had were ideas- theories concocted by what she'd seen the past three days. It wouldn't be enough for OWCA. It was enough for her to see what Mr Martin was like.
Takes a snake to know a snake.
==W&R==
AN: Still working...still working. Phew! Good times, really. Hope everyone is staying safe this summer.