So, I just watched Puss in Boots: The Last Wish, and OMG, I loved it! The animation is beautiful and the story is heartbreaking and went hard for a children's movie. Just when I thought the quality of movies was going down, this movie showed up and smashed everyone's expectations. It definitely lives up to the hype. I highly recommend watching it.
Chapter Fourteen: Toxic Shock
Aside from a few remarks and vulgar name-calling, the men left Suzie alone. Training continued as per usual with new tasks added each day. Cramps plagued her the first two days of her period, which she knew would happen. Even when she felt like curling into a ball or doubling over during a march, Suzie forced herself to stand upright and pushed through the pain.
Yet, the pain only worsened as the week wore on. Other than the constant aches in her abdomen, new and unfamiliar symptoms developed. A deep itch appeared halfway through her period, and in the worst spot imaginable. It took all her willpower to ignore the itch. When she had a chance to scratch, the rash only worsened.
Moreso, despite the warm weather in Texas, chills tormented her, even during drills. Her fingers and toes felt like ice cubes and no matter what she did, the discoloration in the skin would not return to normal.
And that wasn't even the worst part. Nausea and dizziness emerged on day four of her period when the bleeding usually slowed down.
She had thrown up twice in the course of a morning, her lunch refused to stay down, and she swayed on her feet whenever she moved. Through some miracle, she had not tripped over her own feet in front of Stone or anyone other than Richard. The ground did turn into a blurry, brown mess, however. It forced her to rely more on her newfound muscle memory of the camp than her eyesight. Even the sunlight stabbed her eyes, searing right through her skull and worsening the headache.
Richard had noticed Suzie's decline in health after Suzie threw up twice. He suggested that she should see a nurse. After her recent "shaving" incident, Suzie did not want to attract any more attention to herself by visiting the infirmary twice in one week.
Instead, Suzie attributed the dizziness, headache, nausea, chills, and itching to her new, active lifestyle. Try as she might, she never felt clean after each shower and she struggled to sleep at night. The strenuous activity probably only worsened her period symptoms, nothing more.
Suzie told herself that to ease the fear that she had underestimated her ability. To keep from thinking, she occupied herself with tasks to distract herself from the thought that she was in over her head. In his letters, Bucky mentioned a few stories and complaints about basic training and the conditions overseas. Figuring that he exaggerated it to gain pity points from them, Suzie did not give much thought to Bucky's complaints.
Apparently, she was wrong, and not about Bucky magnifying his issues because he liked to complain.
On day six, when Suzie should have returned to normal after five days of bleeding, Stone led the unit through a rigorous obstacle course. First, they had to crawl on their stomachs underneath low-hanging barbed wire. Then they had to swing across a large, muddy puddle on a modified monkey bar set. After they landed on the other side, they had to help each other climb over a large brick wall to finish the course.
During the crawl under the barbed wire, Suzie fought against the urge to throw up. Keeping her head down, Suzie dragged herself through the dirt as the wire scrapped against her helmet. Mud stained her elbows and knees from where they pushed against the ground. Even though the man in front of her kicked her in the face by accident, Suzie ignored the pain and emerged from the first obstacle.
Dizziness took hold during the monkey bars, hitting her like one of Garcia's punches. Her fingers slipped against the wooden bars as her vision swam. Readjusting her grip, Suzie swung herself back and forth to reach the next bar. Her arms protested, her cold fingers ached as if they were frostbitten, her stomach roiled, and her vision blurred.
Shouts from Stone telling her to hurry up faded as a muffled silence filled her ears like someone had stuffed cotton into them. Her fingers brushed against the wooden bar, and before she knew it, a wave of weightlessness swept over her.
The hard impact of her hitting the muddy ground jostled her enough to see Stone's annoyed face glowering above her before she slipped into the darkness.
The smell of chemicals and a pulsing ache below her stomach woke Suzie up. Groaning from the heaviness behind her eyes and in her limbs, Suzie forced her eyes open. A bright lightbulb lit up the hospital bed she lay on. Turning her head to the left side, a curtain separated her from the rest of the open layout. A wall stood on her right side, like her bed in the barracks. An IV stand held a bag of fluids that dripped into her left elbow. A glass of water, a metal pitcher, and a dish of pills sat on a bedside table near the wall.
Strange as it seemed in an army hospital, the curtain provided some semblance of privacy. Even so, Suzie could hear the coughs and groans from other patients through the muted ringing in her ears.
The sound of curtain rings dragging against a metal bar pierced through the numbness. Blinking against the throbbing in her head, Suzie watched as a young, blonde woman stepped into Suzie's section, yanked the curtain closed, and settled her hands on her hips like a mother scolding her child.
The woman wore the standard white nurse uniform with a white seersucker's cap perched on her blonde hair. Dark blue eyes stared at Suzie, and the nurse's red lips curled downward into a frown. She looked to be around twenty-five but she had the air of Winnie Barnes whenever Suzie or her siblings got into trouble.
The nurse tsked and shook her head. "So, you're awake." A thick southern drawl contrasted the neat and proper appearance of the woman.
"How long—" Suzie started, her voice dry and croaky.
"You've been out for two days." The nurse stepped closer and harshly grabbed Suzie's right wrist to check her pulse. Her fingers squeezed Suzie's wrist, sure to leave bruises. "You're damn lucky I know what I'm doing."
The nurse dropped Suzie's wrist onto the white bedsheets in a way that would have made Sarah Rogers roll over in her grave. The lack of bedside manners would earn even the best nurses a write-up and a meeting with their boss. Instead of the Military Police sending her out, the nurse bent down over Suzie, her voice dropping to a whisper.
"What the hell were you thinking?" When Suzie opened her mouth to reply, the nurse placed a neat, manicured finger over Suzie's lips and shushed her. "I know who you are. You're some girl playing dress up and running around with a bunch of men. You think you could get away with something like this, but you can't because I'm thorough. If I weren't, you'd be dead. So, you should thank me for saving your life."
"How'd you—"
"You're supposed to change out your tampons, not leave one in all week. Either you've completely lost your mind or this is your first time using them. I'll be nice and assume that it's the latter. I took it out for you, so you're welcome."
The nurse walked around the bed and checked the IV bag. Turning sideways to glare at Suzie, the nurse tsked again. With her head resting against the pillow, Suzie tracked the nurse's movement, imagining how the nurse knew Suzie's ailment. The thought of someone touching her should have made Suzie angry. Instead, Suzie lay there too tired to protest and took the nurse's berating.
Letting go of the IV bag, the nurse leaned down again. "I didn't believe it before when they brought you in. I thought that you were some soldier too weak to complete a drill. Turns out, you're just stupid. And reckless. And probably a whole bunch of other things that I haven't learned from the past two days!
"Oh, and I've also removed the abscess for you. You're not walking for a few days."
"What?" Suzie exclaimed and tried to prop herself up on her elbows. "I can't stay here! I've got training and—"
The nurse pushed Suzie down with a firm hand on her shoulder. She left her hand on Suzie's shoulder and stared at Suzie with somber intensity. "I don't think you understand the severity of your situation, young lady. You almost died. The only reason why you didn't is because I've seen this before. So, you're welcome. You're also welcome for putting you in a corner away from the other patients and for not reporting you to the brass. You owe me big time."
"Why are you so nice? But in a mean-sorta way?" Suzie asked, causing the nurse to stand up and lean away from the bed.
For the first time, the angry, motherly expression faded from the nurse's face. A flicker of sadness crossed her features and she crossed her arms in front of her chest. "My sister had the same issue as you. She left a tampon in too long and got sick. We found out too late and they couldn't save her."
"I'm sorry. I didn't—"
The sadness disappeared within milliseconds and the annoyance returned. The nurse sniffed and uncrossed her arms. "Yeah, well, it happened five years ago. She also took a lot of illegal substances and was divorced twice before she turned thirty. So, not the best example; but you, I don't know what you're doing here. You're either really brave or really stupid."
"And which one do you think I am?" Suzie stared expectantly up at the nurse.
The nurse paused in thought and hummed before answering. "I haven't figured that out yet."
Walking around the foot of the bed, the nurse dug through a drawer on the bedside table. Suzie tracked her with her eyes, trying to determine why the nurse still hadn't reported her to the brass.
"Why are you helping me?" Suzie asked.
"To save your life, dumbass."
A small smile tugged on Suzie's lips. "I mean, why haven't you…told anyone? About who I am?"
"And who exactly are you?" The nurse looked up from the drawer and placed a washcloth and a metal bowl on the table. She lifted the metal pitcher and poured the water into the bowl. After wetting the washcloth, she handed it to Suzie and left Suzie to clean her face without any help.
"Barnes. Riley Barnes." The nurse shot Suzie an unassumed stare which forced Suzie to correct herself. "Suzie Barnes. I'm from Brooklyn."
"And why did you decide to impersonate a man?"
"I want to help, to avenge my family. To bring my brother home," Suzie answered and wondered when people would stop asking her that.
"Do you think you were in the right mental state when you decided to fake your enlistment papers? Something happened, didn't it?" The nurse took the washcloth and placed it into the bowl. She tugged the pillow out from under Suzie's head and fluffed it to prop it up against the headboard.
"How can you tell?"
"My dad drank himself to death after fighting in the Great War. You've got that same look in your eyes." The nurse helped Suzie sit up, this time being gentle. She handed Suzie the pills and the glass of water.
The water eased the soreness in Suzie's throat and she finished the whole glass after swallowing the pills. The nurse took the empty glass out of Suzie's hands and set it on the table.
"You're gonna be stuck here for a few days, maybe a couple weeks, depending on how fast you heal. After that, you need to pass a physical exam. You should go home after this; you're not in shape to handle the rest of training." The nurse walked to the foot of the bed and removed the clipboard attached to the metal footboard. She pulled a pen from her apron pocket and jotted down a few notes.
"What?" Suzie exclaimed. "I can't go home!"
The nurse looked up from the clipboard, the same patronizing expression stuck on her face. By this point, Suzie assumed that the nurse's face would permanently stick that way. "Give me one good reason not to send you home."
"Because I don't want to."
An agonizingly long minute passed in silence as the nurse stared at Suzie with pure exasperation. Trying her best to remain stoic and stubborn, Suzie locked eyes with the nurse. The frown on the nurse's face deepened and Suzie looked away, losing the unofficial, silent staring contest. The nurse clicked her tongue and reattached the clipboard to the metal frame.
"You know I've heard about you. You're the soldier who showers with a towel, got into a fight over that, and cut 'himself,'" the nurse put air quotes around "himself," "by shaving, and now passed out during a drill from a severe bacterial infection. You're supposed to fight the Nazis, not the men in your unit."
"The fight wasn't my fault," Suzie pouted. Every moment, the nurse sounded more and more like her mom. The unamused staring, the patronizing stance, and the verbal scolding reminded her of Ma. And it hurt that the nurse had not lied—not once.
"You've got a decent facade, it even fooled me until the surgery. I don't know how, but you've got everyone thinking that you're some boy who lied about his age and managed to join the army. It's ridiculous yet it works, so congratulations on that. I don't know what you think you're going to accomplish here, but damn you are one stubborn soldier."
"Why are you helping me?" Suzie repeated, still unsure of the nurse's motives and if she could keep a secret.
Ignoring the question, the nurse continued, "Prove to me you can handle training once you get better. And maybe then I'll think about not sending you home. Find me again once—if—you pass your medical exam. Until then, you're under my care. Get some rest. I'll be back later."
The nurse grabbed the washcloth and bowl. Carrying it with one hand, she reached out for the curtain and tugged it open.
"Wait!" Suzie called out before the nurse could leave. "I don't even know your name."
"Alice Baker and I highly suggest you listen to me. Get some rest, Barnes. You've got a long road ahead of you."
"Do you promise not to tell anyone?" Suzie asked.
A corner of Alice's lips curled upward in an expression reminiscent of Stone's way of expressing amusement. "I think you're here for all the wrong reasons and that you're going down a dark path. But, yes, I promise."
Alice stepped past the curtain and tugged it closed with a flourish. The sounds of her shoes tapping on the wooden floor faded as she walked away, leaving Suzie to lie in the hospital bed, wondering if Alice was right.
Perhaps Suzie had misjudged her ability to handle strenuous situations. If she almost died from an infection from misjudgment and carelessness, then how would she respond to a battle overseas? She lost the battle before even starting. This wasn't a game or some stupid Captain America movie. It was war and she was already at a disadvantage.
Trying to revenge on the men who ripped her family apart might lead her down a dark path. Still, she wanted to blaze a trail across Europe and annihilate any Nazi or Hydra person standing in her way.
But Alice, annoyingly, still had not lied. Travis or Ma could never come back. The chances of finding Bucky were slim to none. Revenge could never put her shambled life together again.
Hopelessness surged through the numbness in her chest, overpowering the physical pain and turning it into something more potent and sinister. For the second time in her life, she felt useless and alone—afraid of what the future held. Even with Alice helping her, nothing could return Suzie's life to normal. The dark path offered Suzie a chance to ease the burning in her heart, and she knew full well that she might not return from it.
That night, Suzie fell asleep crying.
Alice is a completely original character. There are no ties to any comic book or movie character, even though she does look a little like Sarah Rogers (that was a complete coincidence and I didn't realize it until halfway through writing this chapter). If you like her, she'll be a regular character and maybe even another friend for Suzie. It's not like Suzie can do all this alone. She needs help, whether she admits it or not.
Also, if it wasn't clear, Suzie had Toxic Shock Syndrome. It really didn't become a known issue until the 80s, but it still occurred. It's extremely rare (at least today) to develop Toxic Shock from tampons. Still, change them out as often as possible because the risk increases after eight hours.
I don't know when the next update will be. Hopefully, sometime before the end of January. I started college again, so I tend to only write on the weekends when I don't have homework. Til, then, take care of yourself and I'll see you soon! :)