Spoilers: The Unnatural, definitely.

Disclaimer: This scene belongs to David Duchovny. Gillian gets credit too, for bringing great acting to the writing. I'm not giving any credit to CC or Fox, because I'm sure that if it were up to them, this scene would've never happened.

Author's Note: This is my first try at a pseudo-post-ep. (I didn't really write much after the credits roll so I don't think it's a true post-ep.) I hope you enjoy it. Present time Author's Note: I found a CD with old files saved on it and this was one of the documents I had saved. I had originally written and submitted this back in 2000 (yes – I'm that old!) and this is the unedited file. Is it sad that I don't feel that my writing has improved enough over the past 20+ years to bother making at pass at it? Or should I just be proud that I created this work and feel it should be included with the body of work I have posted here? Right or wrong, here it is – as originally published. SS.

A Birthday Gift - With a Twist (1/1)

I can't believe that I'm out at a deserted baseball park on a Saturday night. I truly have no life. So Mulder asked me to come here. He also asked me to help him skim through those damn old newspapers and then proceeded to ditch me on probably the most beautiful Saturday we've had in a long time. And the saddest thing is that I stayed! I can't believe I stayed.

I'm sure this birthday present thing is a scam. If he really wanted to give me a special birthday present, he could've given it to me when we were in Arcadia, pretending to be husband and wife. He could've passed it off as role-playing. I can see him right now: "Here's a nice set of diamond earrings, Scully - I mean, Laura. Thanks for putting up with me all these years." Okay, so I'm dreaming, but it's a girl's right to dream.

Oh god, there he is, and he's batting. Does he think I'm going to sit here and watch him bat all night? Is that what he wants? He wants someone to 'OOOH' and 'AHHH' each time he hits the ball. Well, he better think again if he expects me to fill that job.

"So, uh, I get this message marked urgent on my answering service from one Fox Mantle telling me to come down to the park for a very special, very early or very late birthday present. And Mulder, I don't see any nicely wrapped presents lying around, so what gives?"

I don't see any presents, but I do notice that Mulder looks very cute as he's waiting to hit the next ball - his mouth is open and his tongue is just barely sticking out of the corner of it.

"You never hit a baseball, have you, Scully?"

I have, but it was a very long time ago and it was a softball and the pitches were coming in much slower than the ones being hurled at you by that pitching machine, Mulder.

"No, I guess I have, uh, found more necessary things to do with my time than slap a piece of horsehide with a stick."

Well, that got his attention. I believe that I have never seen Mulder look more shocked at any other time in our lives. I think I have truly offended him with my dissection of the national pastime. Good.

"Get over here, Scully."

Well, when you say it like that Mulder, how can I resist?

I'm a little unsure of this batting thing. It has been a long time and I really don't want to make a fool of myself in front of Mulder. I'd never be able to live it down. Maybe I can still weasel out of this.

Maybe I don't want to. Definitely. I'll do this as long as Mulder keeps his arms around me. I've always loved the feeling of being surrounded by a man. And he's still here. Better say something back. I don't want him to think that I'm enjoying this.

"This my birthday present, Mulder? You shouldn't have."

"This ain't cheap. I'm paying that kid ten dollars an hour to shag balls."

Okay, if I'm willing to do this to keep his arms around me than I'm not sure what I'm willing to do to keep him talking into my ear like that. Just his breath against my skin and my heart rate increases. Who needs aerobics? I've got Mulder.

"Hey, it's not a bad piece of ash, huh?"

Did he just say...?

"The bat, I'm talking about the bat. Now don't strangle it. You just want to shake hands with it. Hello Mr. Bat, it's a pleasure to make your acquaintance. Oh no no, Ms. Scully, the pleasure's all mine."

I have to laugh at Mulder's silly impression of the bat's voice. Okay, Mulder, you're winning. I'm laughing.

"Okay now we wanna, we wanna go hips before hands. Okay? And we wanna stride forward and turn. That's all we're thinking about. So we wanna go hips before hands, alright? One more time, hips... before hands... alright? What is it?

Mulder's mumbling something about hips and hands but I can't really hear him because he just pressed his hand against my hip and used his hand against my hip to press my ass against his groin. I'm trying really hard not to rub my ass against his cock to see if I can get him near as turned on as I am. I really want to pinch myself because I could swear I'm in the middle of some late night fantasy - and it is Saturday night - where I'm wrapped in Mulder's arms while he's whispering into my ear and my ass is pressed against his groin.

Damn, Mulder stopped talking. What was it again? Ass into groin? No, no, that's my saying.

"Hips before hands."

"Right. We're gonna wait on the pitch. We're gonna keep our eye on the ball and then we're just gonna make contact. We're not gonna think, we're just gonna let it fly, Scully. Okay?"

Let it fly. Sure, Mulder, whatever you say. I'll do anything you say so long as you keep your arms around me, your cock pressed against my ass and you keep whispering in my ear with your lips so close that they brush against my skin every now and then.

"Mm Hmm."

"Ready?"

Oh damn, I've gotta snap out of this. Don't want to make a fool of yourself, do you Dana? I don't know how I'm gonna swing this bat right with his arms around me, but I'll be damned if I'm gonna tell him that.

"I'm in the middle."

Damn it Mulder, stop wiggling your hips like that. I can tell your getting turned on and I already was turned on and I'm trying to concentrate so I can hit this damned ball.

"Alright. Fire away, Poor boy."

I think I might've closed my eyes as we hit the ball, but all we did was foul it away. It is hard to swing like this, but I like it. I think you do too, Mulder. You are pulling me back against you again, keeping your arms around me. Don't worry Mulder. That's okay. I like it too. I like it better than anything I can imagine at this moment. Pay attention, Dana! The man is whispering into your ear again.

"That's good. Alright, now what you may find is that you're concentrating on hitting that little ball and the rest of the world just fades away, all your everyday nagging concerns..."

I have to giggle at that and we hit the ball much better this time. That's right Mulder, if you pull me in close after each swing, I'll forget everything.

"... the ticking of your biological clock..."

Okay, I'll give you a chuckle, but only because I'm having so much fun. But, technically Mulder, my biological clock is no longer ticking; it stopped.

"... how you probably couldn't afford that nice new suede coat on a g-woman's salary..."

Thanks for reminding me.

"... how you threw away a promising career in medicine..."

I didn't really want it, Mulder.

"... to hunt aliens with a crackpot, albeit brilliant, partner..."

Oh god, Mulder. I don't think I've ever heard your voice so sweet and low and sexy. If you keep this up, I may have to go home and change my panties.

"... getting to the heart of a global conspiracy..."

Okay, laugh Dana, or he's going to realize that you're so turned on you're about ready to drop the bat and give that poor boy the show of his life.

"... your obscenely overdue XXX bill..."

Are you psychic Mulder, because I really think you're reading my mind.

"Oh, I'm sorry Scully. Those last two problems are mine, not yours."

"Shut up, Mulder. I'm playing Baseball."

Well, Mulder, I think I owe you an apology. This is a very special birthday present. You want me to forget the world for a while. Thank you, even if it is a little late. Hell, if you keep helping me hit that ball with your arms around me while whispering sweet Mulder nothin's in my ear, I might even give you credit for next year.

Okay, we've been hitting this ball for a little over a half an hour, Mulder. And I know I said that as long as you keep your arms around me and whispering in my ear and pressing your now hard cock into my ass that I would do this forever. But, my arms are getting tired and my body is throbbing right down to my center and I really think poor boy's getting a little tired, too.

You know, this is a great birthday present and a great present deserves a great 'thank-you'. What kind of a partner would I be if I didn't thank you properly?

Okay, so if I just... there. That was a good hit. It's always better to end a batting session on a good hit. At least I think so.

I'll just twist around and pray that poor boy doesn't send one of those balls at my head. Oh, Mulder, don't look so disappointed. I'm sure you could do this all night, but I'm pretty sure there are more 'necessary' things we can do with our time.

So far so good. Poor boy hasn't hit me in the head and Mulder just dropped the bat. I can't really see his eyes. I wonder what he's thinking. I can see his lips though, and they look simply divine. Yep, that's it. Divine. Delicious. Delectable. The three D's, Mulder's lips. Too bad they can't whisper in my ear while I admire them.

Okay, so just stretch up on your tiptoes and you can reach, Dana. You need a haircut Mulder, but at least I can put my fingers in it and pull your head down closer to mine and...

Oh my god, I'm kissing Mulder! I can tell he's surprised and scared and cautious. Sorry Mulder, no chaste kisses for you. I want a real kiss this time. I want to thoroughly enjoy the beauty that is your mouth. Your beautiful expressive mouth. My legs get weak with the thought of the things you could do with your mouth.

This is heaven. There is a heaven and I have found it. Here, with my lips pressed against yours, our tongues dueling as they have for years, only then it was with words. I'm here in heaven, kissing you, Mulder, with my fingers caught in your hair, your arms wrapped around me and our bodies pressed together, hips rocking together ever so slightly.

Happy Birthday to me, Mulder. It worked. I'm happy and the world has faded away. I could stay here forever, wrapped in your arms, kissing you, the rest of the world be damned. The aliens could land and conquer the world around us. Just leave us and this ballpark and a poor boy to...

Damn. I forgot about him. Sorry Mulder. This is heaven, but it's time to come back to Earth.

Okay, the smile on your face and the look in your eyes as you look down on me are worth the embarrassment I'm feeling at the little sex education lesson we just gave that poor boy. Thank you.

"I think you should pay your friend so he can go home."

"Good idea."

Oh, your voice is sweet and low and sexy again and I definitely appreciate the rearview as you head over to poor boy to send him on his way. This has to be one of the best birthday presents I've ever received. Come to think of it, I didn't really get you much for your birthday either. I think that I should try to return the favor.

What do you think Mulder?

The end.

Feedback is welcomed and encouraged – even after so many years since this work was written. Scarlet.

"Dear Diary: My heart leapt when Agent Scully suggested Spontaneous Human Combustion."