Chapter ten - Confessions

That evening after dinner a group of students met up in an empty classroom on the fourth floor. Bill had said he practised duelling here quite often and had never been caught before, it being a bit out of the the walking route of most students and teachers. It was the first time they met up to learn defensive magic after they had agreed on meeting that day in the library. With everyone's classes, Quidditch practise, clubs and party's, it wasn't easy to find a evening everyone was free.

When Gina closed the door behind Clair Bridgewater and Gregory Munts, she put a sound blocking charm on the door. It wasn't perfect, but it would have to do. She did a quick headcount when everybody sat down. There were twenty-two people, including two people from Promodores, Gina and Jonne, and Jill from Beauxbatons. Jill had admitted to Gina she was very scared of breaking any school rules, but really wanted to learn how to defend herself better, and Gina had encouraged her to come. Gina sat down to Jill, sitting on a desk.

'Alright people!' Bill said, standing in front. 'We agreed to meet to better learn to defend ourselves. It is not unthinkable that the followers of' -Bill hesitated- 'You-Know-Who will regroup, maybe even really behind someone else, in the future.'

'Or You-Know-Who could return,' Helen softly cut in, sounding scared.

There was an oppressive silence.

'My dad says it's going to happen,' Helen continued hesitantly. 'Him returning, I mean. But my mother says he is gone. They have huge fights about it. Mum says dad is scaring people with his talk, that he shouldn't say it.'

'Well, nobody want to be reminded of the war,' Tarjei said fiercely. 'Because it was- it was terrible. My sister still cries when we talk about it at home. Saying she can't stand the idea of another war. The fear. The uncertainty.'

Gina felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand up. Everyone was looking very grave and Lorene wiped away tears leaking from her eyes. Helen and Hannah walked over to her and Hannah gave her a hug. Gina knew lots of students lost family members at the hands of Lord Voldermort and his Death Eaters.

'Just the more reason to learn to defend ourselves, Andre said fiercely. To protect our families. 'I want to learn how to fight, to duel. I refuse to be a pushover for them.

'I want to learn how to cast protective charms,' Hannah piped in. 'Last time, the Ministry advised to casts all sorts of charms on your house and garden and places, but no one in my family knew hòw.'

'And the Disillusionment Charm?' Gregory Munts looked hopefully. 'Invisibility Cloaks are already sold out everywhere.'

Bill looked a little doubtful. 'I'm sure we can practise duelling, but I am not sure how we can practise the other ones. Maybe I can ask my dad during the Christmas holiday... I guess no one knows protective enchantments?'

Gina raised her hand. 'I can help with those, Bill. I know, well- I think I know most of them.'

'That's great,' Bill smiled at her. 'Wonderful, than-'

'But what about Concealing Spells like the Disillusionment Charm?' Tarjei interrupted him. 'They are very important. How are we going to learn them if no one knows them?'

'I can teach you those too,' Gina said.

A silence fell.

'How do you know that? Tarjei asked sounding amazed.

Gina shrugged. 'Weird upbringing,' she said smiling faintly. I only have problems with the true Invisibility Spell,' she added honestly. This has greatly frustrated her trainer in Spain. Gina still practised it a few times a week, but becoming fully and truly invisible was still out of reach for her. 'But the rest shouldn't be a problem.'

The room was quiet for a while, looking at her in awe. For the first time Gina was glad with her upbringing. It was worth it if she could help these students feel safer and protect their families.

'I would really like to learn protective charms first Gina,' Hannah than said.

A consenting murmur went through the room, and everyone looked at Gina now. She looked at Bill, who grinned at her and gave her a thumbs up. She nodded and stood up.

'Alright... Let's get started with that the basics... We'll start with the Intruder Charm, which will detect intruders. '

At breakfast, Gina talked in a quiet voice to Jonne about the previous night and the terrible times the British Wizarding population had went through.

'I guess I understand that they are scared,' Jonne said slowly, chewing on a piece of toast. 'The war obviously was a horrible and traumatic time for everyone. And all this talk about that Lord You-Know-Who not being dead... I'm rather glad I don't live here. And I wished you wouldn't either,' he added. 'You could move to Finland with me if you want to leave Spain so badly.'

Gina didn't immediately registered what he was saying, as professor Snape had just entered the Great Hall. It took all her willpower not to look at him while he made his way to the staff table. He paused halfway down the long tables to snap at a group of Gryffindors who had made quite a mess, leaving the table full of crumbs, but didn't comment on -of take points from- the Slytherin boys who sat a few feet away from them, and who had by the looks of it gotten yoghurt all over the table. Snape generally favoured his own students before all others. Once he had sat down next to madame Pomfrey, the matron, Gina couldn't help staring at him. Gina wondered if Snape helped madame Pomfrey by brewing potions for the hospital wing. He probably did...

'Ginita.'

'What? Oh, sorry,' she said, hastily focussing on Jonne. 'No, I do want to leave Spain. I don't want to be near my family or the Spanish press, or... hìm.' She thought of her ex and felt her blood starting to boil. The more oceans between them the better.

'Still, no reason to move to a country where there might be another war querida.'

'That probably won't happen,' Gina said with more conviction than she really felt. 'And I could always move again if it would. And I speak the language here.'

'You speak Finnish.'

'You mean I speak Finnish love language,' Gina laughed. 'I can say 'hello', 'how are you' and fifty ways to describe how exactly I want someone to fuck me, as that is all you wanted to teach me.'

'That ìs very useful,' Jonne said grinning. 'And I'll teach you the boring parts, alright?'

'I don't want to move to Finland. It's cold.' Her eyes had darted back to Snape, who was drinking coffee and reading the paper.

'Olet saatanan noita.' Jonne said a little grumpily. You are a damn witch. 'You can use heating spells.'

He stood up.

'Where are you going?' Gina asked surprised. Jonne usually stayed until breakfast was over, reading the paper and drinking cup after cup of coffee with lots of oat milk and sugar. If there were croissants he was especially happy.

'Sit with Clair. We are going... Well, I don't know. See if we can make it work, I guess.'

'You are an idiot,' Gina said.

Jonne took his cup of coffee, shot her a look and walked over to Clair Bridgewater, who had just came in and sat down at the Ravenclaw table. Gina hardly noticed Jonne kissing her on the cheek and sitting next to her, taking her hand. Instead she watched Snape say something to professor Flitwick, who had sat down on his left. She thought of his intense black eyes and his low, cold voice, and thought Finland didn't have men like him.

Next morning, Gina had breakfast with Jill and Lorene, and five minutes in had trouble not to stab her toast. It had been in the Daily Prophet that she 'broke' her ankle during class, which greatly agitated her. Not in the least because Jill and Lorene had tòld her about the stupid article. Gina hated hearing about her press appearances and had been greatly irritated Jonne was sitting with Clair again. Once Clair had left, Gina walked over to him, still fuming.

'How does she even knòw?' she kept saying angrily in Spanish while Jonne scanned the article Gina had shoved under his nose. It had been written by Isabel Vane again and Gina had half a mind to send a letter to her press team, telling them to get a grip and finding out who the hell this woman was. She was indignant that they had not informed her about her already. What else did she have a maldición press team fòr...

'Someone must have talked to her,' Jonne said, eating cornflakes with a doubtful look on his face.

'Probably.' Gina felt angry. 'But whý? It was healed two minutes later. Who càres?'

'I don't know querida. You are just a hot topic at the moment. It will cool down.'

Gina thought back of the potions lesson where she had hurt her ankle. Of Snape's low, articulate, so often sarcastic voice. She felt a shiver running down her spine again. Her physical reaction to him had not decreased in the slightest, still taken her aback when he suddenly stood in front of her during class or in the corridors, yet he had not given her any surmise he experienced any emotion when he saw her. But he was undeniably nicer to her in class than to any other student she had seen. He never made sarcastic -or downright mean- comments to her and he always took the time to answer her questions, unlike some students, which he either ignored or told off for asking -in his opinion- dumb questions.

She was staring so intently at Snape leaning towards madame Pomfrey a little at the staff table Gina did not even notice Alejandro's tiger owl landing next to her, until it dropped a letter in her bowl of porridge and splattering her with the content, sending her spoon flying when it took off again. Gina cursed and waved her wand impatiently, cleaning up the splatters of porridge. Still cursing under her breath, she ripped open the letter in one jerky movement. Jonne looked at her in surprise and Gina gave him a hard look. She was tired of throwing away that coños letters. She'd read the damn thing and thàn throw it away in the fire, watching his words char... How dare he keep writing to her anyway. She told him she wanted nothing to do with him anymore. That he could- Gina snorted quietly, and stared reading.

Estimada Ginita,

Estaba pensando en ti esta mañana y no pude evitar enviarte esto, esperando que algún día respondas a mis súplicas.

¿Recuerdas cómo nos reíamos de Sandro fallando irremediablemente a gritar a Sierra Martínez López? Bueno, lo logró bien. Le tomó cinco años. Sin embargo, son bastante lindos juntos. Pensé que le gustaría saber. Espero que esto te haga sonreír.

Sandro y yo te extrañamos mucho. Te extraño mucho. Tenerte conmigo en la escuela todo el día parece una bendición de una vida pasada.

Pronto te escribiré de nuevo.

Mucho amor Ale

Dear Ginita,

I was thinking about you this morning, and couldn't help sending this, hoping that one day you will return my supplications.

Do you remember how we used to laugh at Sandro failing hopelessly to whoo Sierra Martinez Lopez? Well he managed it alright. Took him five years. They are rather cute together though. I thought you might like to know. I hope this makes you smile.

Sandro and I both miss you very much. Í miss you very much. Having you with me at school all day seems like a blessing from a past life.

I will write again soon.

Much love, Alé

Gina crumpled up the letter. She felt so angry she wanted to lit the damn letter on fire with her wand, but realised just in time this would might make her look a little mental. She handed it a little jerkily to Jonne, who put it in his bag without asking questions.

Gina took a few deep breaths.

'You know, I haven't seen you in the library once since we got here,' she said, determined to talk about anything other than her cheating ex boyfriend.

'Oh, is that where you are all the time,' Jonne said, adding more sugar to his cornflakes and stirring slowly. 'No, of course not. What would I possibly want to do in there?'

'You are supposed to be studying for the second task Jon.'

He wove a hand and took a bite. 'Loosen up princess. And speaking of loosening up, there is a party at the lake shore tonight. Very secret.' He moved his eyebrows. 'And you are coming. He lowered his spoon. I am all for experimenting and trying new things, but this cornflakes is ridiculous.'

'We have it in Spain too,' Gina said.

'That's even more ridiculous. We have Churros for Merlins sake. And café con leche de avena, croissants...' He shook his head. 'Anyway. Back to the point. Be ready at ten thirty sharp, I'll come pick you up.'

'Your room is two doors down from mine. Can you really call that picking up?'

'Just shut your gorgeous mouth querida, or I'll give you something else to do with it,' he said in a low voice.

'Oh fine,' Gina said amused, forcing herself not to look at the high table. Maybe she did needed to relax a bit.

Gina was sitting at her desk when Jonne entered her room that evening.

'Making homework,' Jonne said unbelievingly. 'You are so lucky you have me to get you out and about.' He stroked her hair to the side and kissed her neck, licking her skin.

'Am I,' Gina said amused. She stood up and put her cloak on.

'Yes, you are.' Getting the hint, Jonne held the door open for her and they walked quietly out of the carriage and into the shadow of the forest. He took her hand in his.

'Is Clair coming too?' Gina asked.

'Clair decided she didn't want to see me anymore,' Jonne said.

'You are such a liar,' Gina said laughing, enjoying the rushing of the threes and the moonlight shining trough the treetops.

'No, it's true. Clair decided she didn't want to see me anymore after I told her I wasn't doing the exclusive thing with her.'

'You should tell girls that before you sleep with them,' Gina said sternly.

Jonne looked a little insulted. 'I dò. They just don't listen.' He pulled her in the direction of the lake. 'They think they can chànge me. Even when I tell them I am this way. I like being who I am.'

'I like you too,' Gina said, standing on her toes and planting a kiss on his nose.

He grabbed her waist, letting his hand slip under her skirt.

'That is not happening,' she smiled, retrieving his hand.

'Why not?' he groaned. 'We can come late you know. It's a bloody party as the Brits say it. I haven't fucked you in weeks...'

Gina thought about last time, when they had a very enjoyable night in his room.

'Just keep walking,' Gina said smiling.

They arrived at the lake shore a few minutes later. There were about fifteen students, six and seventh years, and they had taken alcohol, snacks, a radio and blankets to sit on with them. They had made a small, smokeless fire to sit around. She waved at Bill and Tarjei who were chatting to two Gryffindor girls she recognised from Charms. Gina was a little relieved she didn't see Lucian Bole. She got a drink handed to her and took a swig. It tasted like almost pure whiskey with a dash of orange juice. It was exactly what she needed.

At three o clock in the night, Gina and Jonne walked back to the carriage. Gina hadn't had a lot of fun, being preoccupied. She had enjoyed talking to the Gryffindor girls, but after they had left she hadn't taken part in the drunken conversation of the remaining party, and had instead laid down in the sand, hands behind her head, staring at the stars. She had heard Jonne laughing with Bill and Tarjei, talking about the tournament, working out and worst dates. She had smiled when Jonne told about thèir 'date', a few months after they had started sleeping together. They had gone to a Muggle night club in Barcelona together, where Jonne had drunkenly challenged Gina to pick up a guy in less than fifteen minutes. Gina smirked a little when she had heard him say 'this girl' had been so drunk she had accosted a bachelor party and told them she was a witch, and that she would show them magic if they would just follow her to the bathroom.

When they saw the carriage come into view, Gina held out her hand.

'Joni, how drunk are you?'

'I'm a three,' he said confidently. He burped. 'Four. Max.'

Gina hesitated.

Can you come in for a minute? 'Nòt for sex,' she added, looking at his face.

He grinned. 'Álright. You got me curious.'

When he sat down on her bed a minute later, Gina sat next to him, cross-legged, and put her face in her hands.

'Jonne I'm in trouble,' she said in a rather muffled voice.

'Why?'

She hesitated, than plunged on. Her face still in hands, she pinched her eyes shut.

'I have a huge crush on one of my teachers. I can't stop thinking about him. Ever since we arrived at Hogwarts, actually...'

After a stunned silence, Jonne started laughing. 'Is that it? Which one?'

'Black hair, tall. Dark looking...' Gina mused.

'I'll fall for him if you describe him like that,' joked Jonne. 'You mean the bloke who's Head of House, bit pale, bit dangerous looking?'

'Yes of course I do!' snapped Gina. 'Who else? There is only one teacher under thirty.'

Jonne was still sniggering. 'So what? Fuck him out of your system. He's quite good looking, if you are into that sort of thing.'

Gina pushed him. 'He is a teacher Joni.'

'So what? He'd be mad to refuse.' Jonne leaned over and stroked her hair out of her face. Gina closed her eyes at his touch. 'You are gorgeous and sexy and so, so... hot.' He started nibbling on her earlobe. 'Honestly querida, you can get whoever you want.'

Gina pushed him away carefully. 'I don't want you right now.'

'Really?' mumbled Jonne, pushing her back and positioning himself between her legs. 'I'd think you got yourself all in the mood by talking about your... crush.'

His hand had found her nipple.

'Oh shut up,' Gina said in a last attempt to sound stern. He was actually maddeningly right. She had been feeling like she was going to explode for weeks. She sighed and started unbuttoning her blouse.