Authors note - this chapter starts with pauls pov and then switches back and forth from B to P, with a line break in between them. if its too hard to keep up with let me know and ill start labeling povs.
"Are you really not going to tell her?"
I huffed at the voice in my head. No I'm not telling her.
"Why? Don't you want to be with her in your human form?"
No, I don't. I didn't answer Sam directly but he heard my thoughts and sighed. Truth be told I wanted nothing to do with her, imprinting and the string of problems it brings, but the wolf… he won't allow me to stay away.
So going to her in wolf form, soothes him just enough that she'll never have to know anything. I'll never meet her as Paul. I'll never tell her the legends and truths of La Push and I'll never tell her that she is my so-called soulmate. It was never a plan to even spend time with her in wolf form. I don't want this.
The imprint happened when I found her in that clearing chasing after that leech. We were looking for her. I was hiding in the brush about to phase to take her home when her eyes connected with mine. In the blink of an eye I went from completely free to tied to a leech loving girl that I didn't know and didn't want to know.
The plan was to get her home and never see her again, but the damn wolf. My muscles stayed tight, a deep fiery ache set in my chest and I felt something constantly tugging me in her direction. When I got there this afternoon I just wanted to get close, ease the wolf but he wouldn't calm down until she was next to us. Stupid wolf.
"She'll eventually find out."
"No she won't." I growled finally answering him directly. "She'll never know unless someone tells her and no one will."
"Paul, she knows about vampires. She isn't an idiot. At the very least she's eventually going to learn your name with that yes or no game you were having so much fun playing."
The image of her sitting by my side asking questions flashed in my mind. I rolled my eyes at it.
"No. Yes or no question isn't going to lead to admitting I'm a man in a wolf's body and she doesn't know me so my name wont mean much to her. Plus I'm not planning that stupid 'game' again."
He laughed at me. I rolled my eyes. She'll never have to know. It'll be fine. My plan is perfect.
"Dad?" I called as I walked through the back door. When the sound of Charlie's car pulled up the wolf had jumped up running into the woods.
"In here, Bella." He called back. "I figured we could watch the game while we ate. Can you grab some drinks?"
He means so he can watch the game and I can stare at the wall. I rolled my eyes. Grabbing a beer for him and water for me I went to the living room sitting down on the couch after handing him his beer.
I munched on my pizza while Charlie watched his game. He was yelling at the tv every few minutes, so without even looking I knew his team was losing. I dropped my pizza and gasped when the pain hit me.
It hit so suddenly.
"Are you okay?" Charlie asked.
"Umm…" I took a deep breath. The pain was settling into a constant deep throb. "Y-yes I'm fine. Bit my tongue." I lied.
Charlie gave me a strange look but didn't say anything more. Appetite gone with the pain back, I asked Charlie if he was done. He nodded so I picked up the mess and took it to the trash out back. Quickly I cleaned the kitchen up, washing the few dishes I used.
As I was going up the stairs to shower Charlie called my name. I turned to see him at the bottom of the stairs.
He hesitated. "Do you have to work tomorrow?"
I shook my head. "Off this weekend."
"Tomorrow I'm going fishing with Billy." No surprise there he always does on Saturday. "Jacob and a couple of his friends are going, I thought… well I thought you could come too." I blinked. Me? Fishing?
"I just think it'd be good for you to get out of the house, maybe meet some new people. You know Jake, but like I said his friends will be there. They are a little younger than you but still…"
It seemed oddly important to him. Never has he asked me to go fishing with him and I didn't really have the desire to but Charlie is trying. Has he been trying since I moved here? I couldn't seem to remember.
"Okay, yeah sounds fun." I smiled, only slightly forcing it.
"Great. Set your alarm for 4 a.m. We like to get out there around 5 a.m." He said as he turned to go back to the game.
4 a.m! I knew he got up early as I'm an early riser and he is always gone before I get up, but dang it I don't want to get up at 4 a.m.
"4 a.m?" I asked to confirm I heard right.
He laughed once. "Yes. 4 a.m."
Crap. Shoulder slumped, I headed to the bathroom. After a long shower, I sat on my bed once again wrapped in a towel staring at the rocking chair in the corner of my room.
Remembering the times he sat right there, the times we sat there together with me cuddled in his cool arms, I cried. Big fat tears rolled down my cheek. I tried to shake it off. Remind myself that he didn't want me so it didn't matter but the pain I felt made it matter. I rubbed my chest as I got up to put on shorts and a tank top. Climbing in bed I stuffed the pillow under my head and the covers over my face. Sleep instead of think, I reminded myself as my eyes closed.
A soft noise was waking me. I groaned, rolling to look at the clock, rubbing a slight ache in my chest. Not as painful as last night but still annoying.
3:23 a.m
"It's not even 4 yet, " I mumbled, assuming in my sleepy state it was him. A low whine answered me. I sprung out of bed. What the? I looked around. The wolf? I heard the low whine again and moved toward my window. There just in the tree line was the wolf.
Absentmindedly I rubbed my chest, the pain fading. "What are you doing?" I whispered.
He cocked his head, tongue rolling out to one side and it laid down, putting its head on his paws. It whine again and before I knew what I was doing I had on a robe and was downstairs opening the back door. The wolf was at the steps, not worried about being seen in the dark. I sat on the steps and he moved closer. Without thinking I grasped his face, my fingers full of the dense silky fur and laid my head against his.
'What are you?' I asked again, almost desperately. The pain I felt in Edwards absence seemed to fade when he was around and I wanted to know why.
He huffed, rolling his eyes. I'd imagine he'd be saying something along the lines of 'stop asking that' if he could talk. I chuckled at my thoughts and his head turned, staring at me intently.
The wolf was purring. The feeling of her hands had him purring. She giggled at the sound. I rolled my eyes. Jared was chuckling in my head. I growled. What is wrong with these people? Don't they understand that this isn't a good thing. Having your will stripped away in the name of love isn't a good time in my book.
"It's not like that." Jared said, thinking of his imprint Kim. "Being bound to someone doesn't mean your will is taken away."
"Really? Cause I don't want to be here but yet here I am." I growled. Bella removed her hands.
"Sorry." She said, thinking I was growling at her. I whined, nudging my head back under her hands. She smiled. She rested against the railing of the porch, eyes heavy. She isn't sleeping well. I can hear her from my spot under her window, where I lay when I'm not patrolling. She tosses, turns and whimpers in her sleep.
Another voice joined ours. "You may not be ready to admit it, but you do want to be there. Believe me I know."
Sam. He was thinking about when he first imprinted on Emily. He fought it at first because he was already in a relationship with Leah and very much in love with her, but in the end he gave in to the imprint.
"Just cause you rolled over doesn't mean I will." I scoffed, regretting my words when I felt his flash of pain.
They didn't say anything else, but I could hear their thoughts. They think I'm crazy. Why wouldn't I want to be with my soulmate, they wondered. The answer is simple, I should be in control of my life and forcing an imprint on me is taking control. I don't want it.
My eyes perked up. The Chief was waking up. I nudged Bella's nose with mine, she was falling asleep. She startled awake. I ran my nose up her cheek then quickly turned and ran into the woods. I stopped just inside the tree line so I could still see her. She's going fishing with Charlie and Billy today. If it's their normal fishing spot I should be able to follow. Stay close. Just to soothe the wolf.
"Just to soothe the wolf. "Jared mocked. "Keep telling yourself that, bud."
I growled at him, saying nothing. Bella looked confused at my departure, but it wasn't long before Charlie came downstairs and she scrambled inside. Telling him she just needed some fresh air when he asked what she was doing.
"Paul, it's time for your patrol." Sam remained me.
I huffed. I wanted… no the wolf wanted to stay close.
Jared chuckled. "It's only 3 hours, Paul."
Sam sighed, reading my conflicting thoughts and remembering his own time prowling the woods, following Emily wherever she went. "Follow Bella. I'll run the line and as long as all is clear you can stay with her."
I didn't answer him directly, but my thoughts whispered a thank you to him.
I laid down, content to listen as she fluttered around the house. Bedroom, bathroom, bedroom, kitchen and finally back in my sight. I could just barely see her from my spot, getting in her truck with Charlie.