This story originated from something I've dubbed as "Impulse Writing". Read the author's note, and I'll explain what that's all about.
Till then, enjoy!
Yamada Asaemon Sagiri was not having a nice day.
For the last half hour she and her fellow Asaemon had stood guard over the condemned, under the blistering midday sun, waiting for the Shogun to arrive.
The fact that they all had to wear their ceremonial haori jackets in the heat to show respect, simply made the whole ordeal all the more uncomfortable. She was certain that Jikka would have left by now for a cold cup of sake— If not for the fact that he was in direct line of sight of Eizen.
The thought of Jikka's casual unprofessionalism and Eizen's over-the-top outraged reactions to his third-in-command's antics almost made Sagiri crack a smile, but she banished the thought before her lips could so much as twitch.
"The way of the Yamada Asaemon is to control one's emotions with an iron will. Place them aside and rely on logic and reason. That is how I must strive to live."
Still, it was easier said than done. She had to make a conscious effort to keep her face stoic and not attempt to dab away at the sweat on her forehead. She had seen Senta, Jikka and even Fuchi do so and receive no repercussions other than a pointed look, but Sagiri knew that for her it would be different. The same rules would not apply for her.
It would only take the smallest mishap on her end, for Eizen and Genji to launch into another lecture about how she was not fit for the harsh life that came with dedicating your life to the blade.
Sagiri was not delusional. She was under no impression that she was the perfect samurai, and she was willing to accept that her lack of experience and comparatively young age made her make her fair share of mistakes. Neither did she hold anything against her seniors who would point them out to her— It was their job to catch those mistakes and teach the younger generation on how to avoid them and do better.
No, what she hated was that to most of her elders, the mistakes were caused not because of any fault of Sagiri as a swordsman— But simply because she was a woman.
Its like no one saw her as a samurai. All they saw was an anomaly. A child throwing a temper tantrum. Anything less than perfect and someone would be ready with a comment on how a woman was ill-fitted to be an executioner, someone not worthy enough to carry an Asaemon blade.
So she drowned herself in training. Day in and night out, she would swing her sword, ignoring the comments and thinly veiled barbs until her palms were calloused and her legs were about to give out.
Surely her efforts would be recognised if she showed everyone how serious she was?
Surely they would accept her as an equal is she could just show everyone the strength of her resolve?
So she trained and she trained until she was skilled enough to enter the top ten rank of the Asaemon, declaring her to be one of the strongest swordswoman in not just the Yamada clan, but the whole of Japan.
And she was the first woman in her clan to have ever done so.
"That will show them!" Sagiri had thought joyfully at that time. "Surely, now they will accept me as an equal!"
How naive she had been.
For a few moments, it was the happiest day of her life as she was awarded the haori all Ranked Asaemon members get, by her father, the then-Head of the clan. Sagiri felt accomplished, for once her mind was unburdened by any dark thoughts. She was sure that she had finally made her father proud, that she would finally be acknowledged as not being inferior just because she was of the fairer sex.
"You performed well... for a woman."
That was all that Sagiri's father, Yamada Asaemon Kichiji, had to say as he offered her the folded jacket. He didn't even bother looking into her eyes, averting his gaze from her figure as she took the haori with shaking hands.
Sagiri had felt glad that the ceremony had required her to her stay in a kneeling position with her head lowered, where her bangs could cover her eyes. She wouldn't have been able to bear the shame it if her clan or father had managed to glimpse her misty eyes and quivering lips at that moment.
You performed well... for a woman.
Those damned words. A sentence she has heard as many times as she has drunk tea in her life. But never before had the words hurt as much as when her own father uttered them to her. Never before did they haunt her dreams like they did after her father had said them to her in a voice so filled with contempt.
All that effort, all those sleepless nights, all the pain and humiliation she went through, she did all for a single word of praise. A single sign that her efforts were recognised. But all it led to was her pride being trampled on again; this time by none other than her own father!? Sometimes she wished she could just—
Sagiri grit her teeth and forced herself to take a deep breath, effectively cutting her own dangerous thoughts short. She then closed her eyes and silently started practicing some of the meditative breathing techniques that Shion had taught her. After half a minute she finally calmed down, and opened her eyes. She could feel Eizen's questioning gaze on her, but she ignored it and continued facing stoically forward.
Normally she would feel embarrassed to be caught loosing her cool, but Sagiri was too mentally tired to care at that instant. She was certain he would question her about what happened later, but she knew he was not going to break protocol and speak now. She would have time to think of what to say to Eizen later.
This was why Sagiri hated simply waiting, without doing anything to keep her mind busy and occupied. For whenever she is alone with her thoughts, she spirals almost instantly.
To Sagiri, none of the dozens of criminals sitting in front of her registered as threats, as her biggest enemy present was none other than her own state of mind. Her frustration, her insecurities and her roiling emotions could hurt her more than the condemned in front of her ever could.
A booming voice thankfully interrupts both Sagiri's thoughts and the monotony of the situation, as everyone present on the beach hears—
"HIS HIGHNESS THE GREAT 11TH SHOGUN OF OUR BELOVED LAND, TOKUGAWA NARIOSHI, IS ARRIVING! ALL LOYAL TO THE THRONE, SHOW YOUR RESPECTS BY KNEELING BEFORE YOUR ESTEEMED RULER!"
With a subtle sigh of relief as Sagiri kneels, she allows herself one small smile. Finally. Something to focus on that is not her own thoughts and regrets. And what better distraction that preparing for a trip to Paradise itself?
"You don't like killing do you?"
*SSHWINGGG*
Sagiri, who had just wiped the blood off her katana and was about to sheath it, immediately spun around, upon hearing the words casually spoken so close to her immediate vicinity. Only to come face to face with a man standing barely two feet away from her, who was... lazily smiling at her?
"How did anyone manage to get this close without me sensing them?"
The man, seemingly unfazed by the fact that there was now a deadly sharp blade less than an inch away from his neck, simply smiled wider at Sagiri's scrutinizing glare.
His deep brown eyes locked onto her lighter brown ones and Sagiri had to blink in shock at the emotion she read in them, her lips parting slightly in surprise. Something so rarely sent her way that the concept was almost alien to her. She had to blink again to confirm what she was seeing.
The man was looking at her with a gaze full of admiration.
"But that didn't stop you from making quick work of these idiots did it? Three swings, three clean beheadings," the man says as he finally breaks eye contact and shifts his attention to the katana at his throat. After studying it for a second, he let out a whistle and continues speaking in a tone filled with wonder.
"And not a single nick on your katana. That can only mean that you managed to avoid the bones in the neck— the cerebral vertebras. Every. Single. Time. While all of them were running at you!? Holy shit lady, you're one scary talented swordswoman!"
.
.
.
Through her work as an executioner, Sagiri had witnesses the last moments of all manner of people. So when they are on the brink of death she could perceive what truly lies in their heart. She can tell who is pretending to be strong in the face of death, who has given up on all attachment to life, who are genuinely remorseful for their crimes and those who have no regrets no matter how horrendous their sins may be.
Her katana always reflects the truth, no matter how ugly it may be.
It is an ability that has caused her much grief, showing her horrors in the reflection of her blade which haunt her dreams and which she sometimes wishes she had never set eyes on. Just a few moments earlier she had been haunted by the the act of taking the lives of her attackers in the form of a horrid vison of their decaying corpses trying to pull her into the ground. It honestly made her want to puke.
But Sagiri knew that it is a good skill to have when you want to find out the unfiltered truth, and that is what she uses it for here. To search for falsehoods in the man's words, for any sign of deception.
"The one in front of me is criminal." Sagiri reminded herself cynically. "Attempting to manipulate me is definitely a very real, and frankly, more plausible possibility here. More plausible than him a-actually..."
But her hopes get crushed and her thoughts come to an abrupt halt as she continues looking into the reflective sheen of her katana.
And the blade that never lies shows her exactly what she had been fearing the most.
The man's words of praise were completely genuine.
Warmth blossoms into Sagiri's cheeks, and to her chagrin she found herself blushing as she looked back into the dark eyes of the smiling man.
Suddenly Sagiri realised how the man had gotten so close to her. She was good at sensing threats and killing intent. And reason the man had gotten as close as he did was because he had no hidden agenda to pursue whatsoever. Sagiri was so used to being on guard and wary of concealed resentment that when some one approached her with complete honesty she couldn't gauge it properly and ended up missed him completely.
Sagiri suddenly felt hyper-aware of... everything. How clammy her hands suddenly were, and how dry her mouth and throat suddenly felt. How sweaty her face was after being in the sun for the better part of an hour and how a long strand of hair was stuck to her cheek from the same sweat. She had enough presence of mind to not lower her katana to tuck it back behind her ear, but it was an embarrassing close call as she had to make a conscious effort to keep her blade level.
Sagiri also realized that she has been just staring at the man in front of her for the last minute, saying nothing as she has a mini-heart attack. Or a minor heat-stroke. Or possibly both.
That had to be the only explanation as to why her whole face felt so hot and her heart was suddenly beating so damn hard that its sound drowned out the bloody fighting going on around her, as Sagiri gazed into the twin pools of dark chocolate belonging to the smiling man in front of her.
... She would have to ask for a diagnosis and some medicine from Fuchi before embarking on the voyage.
Just as Sagiri was wondering if she had been staring into his eyes for too long and if it would be awkward to say something or look away now, the moment was broken with the sound of scrapping steel against wood - the telltale sound of a katana being drawn from its saya (1.).
Sagiri finally broke eye-contact and looked to her side to find Eizen-dono standing next to her, with his katana pointing directly at the face of the still smiling man.
"If you know what's good for you convict, you will stop harrassing my colleague and step back. Now."
The edge in his voice was as sharp as the steel of his blade. Yet, the adressed man held Eizen-dono's one-eyed glare, infamous in the Asaemon Clan for sending many younger trainees kowtowing (2.) at his feet in fear, and simply raised an eyebrow at him.
In response Eizen's jaw clenches and his face gradually becomes a shade of red only slightly lighter than his hair. Sagiri's eyes widened even more and she couldn't help but marvel at what she was seeing. The charming convict had managed to rile Sir Eizen up to such a degree without even uttering a single word in his direction.
"Where I come from, to barge in uninvited into a conversation is considered rather rude Samurai-sama~. Don't tell me you spent so much time learning the art of the blade that you forgot the art of basic courtesy? Anata no tame ni hazukashī desu~" (3.)
Eizen's lips parted in a snarl and his face went from red to purple at this bold act of open disrespect. The obviously fake politeness in the convict's voice only manages to enrage him more.
"You damned littl-"
"Eizen-dono please," Sagiri lowers her own blade and turns to her senior. "The convict is trying to get a rise out of you with his taunts. To retaliate in anger would be the same as giving him exactly what he wants."
She mentally thanked Kami-sama that her words were steady and calm, unlike the state her mind was in just seconds prior.
"So what do you expect me to do Sagiri? Stand still and listen to him bring my honour into question!?"
"Let me deal with this. Please Eizen-dono."
"Please let me prove myself for once."
The last part was left unsaid, but Eizen could feel it in her gaze as she pleaded with him.
"Please... trust me for once"
Her earnest eyes seem to implore him, and Eizen found his rage at the criminal diminishing slightly as he looked at Sagiri. He kept silent for a few seconds thinking it through, before finally coming to a conclusion .
With a sigh Eizen relents and gives Sagiri the briefest of nods, almost smiling at the joyful expression that passed through her face at having gotten her mentor's approval.
His mood immediately soured when he turned to look at the smugly smiling convict. Shooting a dirty look at his offender, Eizen walked back a few steps giving Sagiri some privacy to handle matters on her own. The cold and deadly steel in Eizen's hands glinted menacingly as the late afternoon sun rays struck it. He kept his katana lowered, but unsheathed. Like a coiled silver cobra, ready strike at a moment's notice. He wouldn't interfere, but he was going to keep a close eye on what was going on regardless.
With a sigh, Sagiri's turned back to face the now grinning convict.
"To deliberately provoke the rank One Yamada Asaemon, you truly must have resigned yourself to your death Kirisaki Ren."
That wiped the smug smirk off his face, as a surprised look settled there instead. Sagiri forced down a smile that almost creeped onto her face. She knew it was childish, but she relished the satisfaction of finally being the one to leave him speechless, instead of the other way round.
It didn't last long though, as the shit-eating grin returned to Ren's face and Sagiri suddenly felt a sense of wariness for what was to come. He raised his bound hands in front of his face, covering his lower face and turned his head slightly away, not meeting her eyes. It wasn't until he started speaking in a clearly fake, higher pitched demure tone that Sagiri realised he was pretending to be some kind of a bashful maiden.
"Hazukashī desu~~ Not only did you protect me from your scaaaryyyy senpai, but you also know my name? Oh, how flattering~! It can only have one meaning...! That you are my secret admir-!"
*SSHWINGGG*
"... Complete your sentence, and you will wish that I had let Eizen-dono deal with you."
Seemingly unbothered by the katana that was once again barely a hair's breath away from his neck, Kirisaki Ren simply focused on Sagiri's once again blushing face. Whatever he saw apparently was too much for him to handle, as he lowered his bound hands that were covering his grin and let out a joyful laugh.
And Sagiri couldn't help but note how... free it sounded, even with a blade at his neck and his wrists currently bound. It almost made her feel jealous, for some unexplainable reason.
It was not a particularly loud laugh, but such a contradictory action amidst the violence and death surrounding them immediately called for everyone's attention.
Sagiri felt her face grew even hotter from embarrassment as she saw and felt the eyes of her fellow Asaemon, some of the criminals, and even the Shogun himself on her and Ren. What's worse was that apparently it did not seem to phase Ren at all, or maybe he simply didn't notice, as he continued laughing without showing any signs of stopping.
"Stop it, you're embarrassing me..!" Sagiri hated how whiny and panicky she sounded as she angrily whispered to Ren, but atleast it seemed to work. At least he went from full blown laughter to a quieter chuckle.
"Gomen, gomen... (4.) Haaaah... that felt good. Arigatou(5.), I don't think I've laughed that much in months."
"...Did it have to be at my expense? In front of the Shogun of all people!?"
"Ha! I didn't mean to embarrass you but your reaction was just too funny. And cute! Again, Gomen'nasai." Ren apologised again, this time with a small bow and a rueful grimace on his face.
The genuine sincerity in his words and the casual way he called her "cute" of all things, made Sagiri's heart skip a beat and caused her receding blush to re-erupt onto her face. Unsure as to what to say, she chose the safe option and kept her lips pursed together and simply glared at Ren.
"Is this supposed to be flirting?" The implication confused Sagiri, and for a good reason. Being the heiress of the Asaemon Clan, she was spared from courting rituals of any kind as her fate had already been written. She was to be married to the next Clan Head, the seat of which was currently empty. So while Sagiri knew of courting rituals and such from the stories she's read and the Kabuki (6.) plays she's watched, it's not something she's ever experienced herself.
Not that she would just let herself be used like that, she was fully ready to fight for her freedom when the time came. But she set those thoughts aside for now and focused on the infuriating man standing in front of her.
She was also especially flustered by the sheer frankness and lack of judgement in Ren's words. Almost every male samurai she has met was silently judgemental at best, and openly disrespectful at worst. One would think her rank of heiress would dissuade such talks, but it was no secret that her father had disapproved of her following the path of the blade. That was enough permission for many of the samurai, specially the elders, to ridicule her as her father showed a blind eye to the suffering of his daughter.
In a sense, Sagiri was used to being doubted at this point. She had hardened her heart and it didn't affect it as much as it did when she was younger.
In contrast, Ren's genuine compliments were especially hard to deal with as it was something almost completely new to her.
"To be so affected by a criminal's words, I need to have better control over my emotions! A-and how dare he act so casually with me!? To act so flippantly in such a serious situation!? N-not that it would be any better in a c-casual situation but...Arghhh! What am I even thinking!?"
To Sagiri's annoyance, the very person who turned her head into a mess in the first place, was the one who broke her out of her jumbled thoughts by posing a question to her.
"But seriously though, how did you know my name?"
Shaking her head slightly to clear her mind, Sagiri explained, "All of us Yamada Asaemons were handed files on all the convicts to be brought here. They included for us a full profile of every criminal, including their crimes, fighting style, favoured weapon and even a sketch of their face for easy identification. I know your name because I made a point to at least memorize everyone's face, name and fighting style."
Ren's eyebrows rose at that and he let out a low whistle. "Smart, makes sense. Also, impressive work ethic on your part to go ahead and memorise the details even though you had the files on you. Good job! Ganbare~! (7.)"
"ARRRRGHH...! Again with the compliments! And why are they affecting me like this!? And how can a murderer, a death-row convict like you have such a sincere smile!?
Who are you Kawasaki Ren?"
Seemingly not noticing Sagiri's inner turmoil, Ren sighed before continuing to speak. "Still, disappointing to know that I did not specifically catch your eye. It would have been a fine confidence boost to know I managed to catch the attention of a beautiful woman such as yourself."
Once again barely suppressing her blush, Sagiri answered in a chipped tone. "I would suggest you cease your needless cajolery for now. I am a samurai first, and a woman second. Your flattery will get you nowhere."
"It's not flattery if its the tru-"
"Enough of this redundant talk!" Sagiri interrupted, abruptly ending the conversation short before Ren managed to affect her head (and heart) any more. She needed a clear head for this. And she could feel the glaring eyes of Eizen-dono on the back of her head.
No more stalling, or he would have her head later on. And probably Ren's head as well, except it would be a lot more literal in his case.
"Answer me this, Kawasaki Ren, why did you approach me? And..," Sagiri continued, her tone getting more indignant as she remembered the words that had caught her attention in the first place. "And what did you mean by your first words spoken to me?"
Ren's eyebrows furrowed cutely, followed by Sagiri mentally slapping herself for daring to even think such an obscene thought. "My first wor- oh, that comment about you disliking killing?"
"Indeed, what were you implying with your words? Are you questioning my resolve!?" Sagiri tried to keep her cool, but the casual tone of his voice rubbed her the wrong way. And her anger and hurt noticeably slipped into her words and expression, even through her tried to suppress it.
"Were those words of praise all lies then? Some sort of ploy to manipulate me? Are you no different from all those look who judge me and look down upon me for something I cannot control?"
Seemingly noticing her mood, Ren's expression also changed into a more serious one. "I would have— if you had not managed to push through your hesitation and killed those dumbasses. No, you are certainly not lacking in resolve, I can tell you that. I was just making an observation, simply stating what I had seen with my own eyes."
Sagiri's anger dissipated in surprise at Ren's words. This time it was her eyes that widened in shock and distress. "Hesita- How did yo-?"
"As you readied yourself for your first swing, your arms stilled for maybe half a second. Not only that, but for that short period of time, your eyes showed reluctance and regret at what you were about to do. And after the deed, your eyes were unfocused and pained and your breathing was much too heavy for the amount you moved. I could even swear that for a moment your arms shook slightly. You composed yourself impressively quickly, but I could tell.
And for you to feel that way for these vile, disgusting vermin wearing the faces of humans? Who would not think twice before taking your life or doing worse simply because they can? For you to feel remorse for ending their miserable lives, there's only one explanation I can come up with.
The act of taking lives pains you. Or to put it in even plainer terms.
You simply hate killing."
Sagiri was left speechless, gaping at the man in front of her in disbelief. His words shocked her to her very core, and she almost subconsciously took a step back from him and lowered her katana from his neck, suddenly finding it much to heavy for her arms.
Or was she the one that was too weak to carry it in the first place?
"Am I that easy to read? Such an open book that it took a stranger just a single glance to tell what is wrong with me? I should be feeling rage right now. I should be offended at this criminal for daring to question my resolve and strike him down where he stands for insinuating me of such weakness."
"So why don't I?"
"Why do I suddenly feel so small? So vulnerable and so completely naked? I don't even know when I broke eye contact with the man in front of me and lowered my head so that my bangs cover my eyes. But I can't seem to lift my head back up again. Why do I feel this immense sense of shame that's weighing down on me, almost like cold bloody hands pulling me down closer to the ground, stopping me from rasing my head looking Kawasaki Ren in the eyes?"
"Because you know he's right."
The traitorous voice of her subconscious whispered to her from the back of her head. The same voice that she had silenced earlier before the Shogun's arrival, the same voice that plagues her nightmares and tells her to give up whenever Sir Eizen or Sir Genji berate her or when her father used to tell her that little girls should not be playing with swords.
The voice resurfaced with a vengeance, sounding almost gleeful as it whisper its cruel words into her ears again.
"Stop pretending. You will never be more than the Asaemon heiress. Your only role being to be a dutiful wife and a bearer of children. You are a woman. Women are weak. You are weak. You will never be a real samurai. You will never be able to control your destiny. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up."
"!GIVE UP!"
Maybe the voice is right. Maybe everyone is right after all. After all, how could a woman, someone inferior, someone weaker-
"And that's a great thing. It's your greatest strength after all."
Those words broke Sagiri out if her dark thoughts, but before she could fully register Ren's words, the Shogun's right hand shouted out an order.
"WHOEVER KILLS THIS MAN GETS A PLACE ON THE SHIP!"
She turns turns in time to see her own convict, Gabimaru effortlessly dodge a heavy boulder thrown at him by bending his back, before straightening back up and start talking to the criminal who threw it at him as if nothing happened. Looking at the sight in front of her Sagiri lightly shook her head and let out a sigh, still partly distracted be her dark thoughts and Ren's strange words.
Putting the convict's words at the back of her mind for the moment, she focused on what was happening with her prisoner. This day just seemed to get longer and longer.
"What an atrocious was to end lives..."
"Think they'd hold it against me any less if I killed 'em nice and clean?"
Sagiri barely followed that exchange between her prisoner and her senior. As Gabimaru walked back into the encampment, Sagiri was still reeling from what she saw. Not the brutality of the ninja's kills, but rather what she saw in her katana's reflection after the fight- no after the massacre was over.
His burden.
"What I needed all along was not the strength to kill without fear, but rather... the resolve to bear that weight. The weight of my fear and the lives I take.
Is that what you were trying to tell me, Kirisaki Ren?"
Sagiri asks as she wipes a tear from her cheek and turns to her right, where the aforementioned man leans against one of the wooden poles to which the while cloth walls are attached. Which was now torn asunder because of the violence between the criminals and Gabimaru.
He lightly chuckles at that, and Sagiri catches herself before she could think of something embarrassing - like how his smile looked good in the light of the setting sun. Yup, she definitely did not think about how his dark eyes shone beautifully in the golden light, and she certainly did not find his laugh calming and pleasant to the ears. It was simply the, now unblocked, ocean breeze making her feel refreshed. And her cheeks were undoubtedly not red, it was simply a trick of the crimson light coming from the setting sun.
"It appears I have Gabimaru to thank for hastening your understanding of my words. What a lucky coincidence."
"I would still like to hear what you had to say. You contradicted yourself there - you pointed out my weakness and then said that is my greatest strength. How so?"
"It's simple really. It speaks volumes of your inner strength and resolve that you are willing to kill those deserving even though there's nothing you hate doing more. The fact that you are willing to put aside your own feelings and do what needs to be done is most admirable.
It means you still have a conscience. That you are a good person. To be able to kill someone and not feel anything? A person like that is no longer a human, they are a monster. A psychopath who can no longer feel empathy. The regret and pain you feel is proof that you are human.
You just need to find the strength to carry that burden.
And from what I have seen, I'm absolutely sure you are capable of such a feat, and much, much more. So stop looking so sad all the time Sagiri. A smile suits your pretty face much more."
Sagiri blinked. And then blinked again. What surprised her was not his words, but the fact that Ren's words made... sense.
Like a fog was clearing from her head as each of his words entered her ears. It was like he had put on her a pair of glasses, like the ones Senta-dono wears to correct his poor vision, and she could finally see everything with much clearer focus.
Hearing his perspective and his thoughts on her character made her almost feel proud of herself - an almost foreign feeling, when she was constantly belittled in her family's dojo for the smallest of mistakes. She had long given up on getting the approval of her seniors and peers, but here was a death-row criminal giving it to her freely and with a smile on his face.
She felt validated. For perhaps the first time, she felt truly seen — like the man in front of her could look through her eyes and gaze directly at her naked soul. His gaze was piercing but his eyes held no judgement. And in his eyes was a simple but profound message for Sagiri to see. A message that made her lips curve unconsciously into a smile so wide it almost made her cheeks hurt.
"I see you. And I accept you as you are."
Unlike previous when she shed a tear unknowingly, this time Sagiri could feel the moisture start to gather in her eyes. But she could not find the heart to stop it. For her heart was already too busy beating frantically to listen to any form of logic.
Before Sagiri could formulate a response, the shouter from earlier yelled out once more.
"THAT'S QUITE ENOUGH LAW-BREAKERS! THOSE OF YOU REMAINING HAVE ALL QUALIFIED!
... Or that is what I would say, if not for one of you choosing to not take part of the elimination process!"
Sagiri broke away from Ren's gaze at those words and turned to look at the Shogun's retainer. And her eyes widened with horror.
For his hand was outstretched and with a long finger he was pointing at her direction. Or to be more precise, at the person standing just a few feet away from her. At Ren.
"KAWASAKI REN! You didn't lift a finger in the fight! You chose to spend the entirety of the fight in proximity of the Asaemon to avoid anyone trying to attack you! The Shogun is displeased by your cowardice! Only the bravest and fiercest could hope to even dream of finding the Elixir of Life, and your are clearly neither— hence, I declare you disqualified!
There are currently ten members of the ranked Asaemon ready to look over each criminal. But eleven convicts remain. And it would be insulting to the other convicts to let one such as you enter the voyage when they were the ones who steeled their resolves and got their hands dirty. I hope you understand. Eizen-dono, if you would please."
"It would be my pleasure."
Before Sagiri could even utter a sound of protest, Eizen's form seemed to blur in front of her eyes and vanish. She barely had the reaction time and reflexes to follow his path and turn, just in time to see him at Ren's side with his katana un-sheathed and held high above his head. He had used the same move Sagiri had tried using on Gabimaru, on the day of his execution.
But he was much faster.
Sagiri's heart felt heavy with despair as she realised there was no way to evade his blow. Eizen's skills were the real deal, his speed unmatched amongst the Asaemon clan. She was certain that not even a skilled ninja like Gabimaru would be able to evade the blow completely. Ren's chances looked slim.
She wanted to cry out in protest - but the Shugun's orders where clear. And it was much to late for her to try to stop it, by the time she could reach him, the sword would have fallen. The sword was raised high in the air and it's steel reflected back the rays of the setting sun, making it the crimson colour of blood. All the while Ren simply continued staring in the direction of Sagiri. Not a hint of panic or worry in his eyes. A stark contrast from the great distress in Sagiri's gaze.
*SSSSSHWIIIIIINNGGGG*
Eizen's blade came down with the speed and ferocity of an eagle diving down to the ground to hunt it's weak and unsuspecting prey.
But in this case the bird of prey misjudged it's prey.
For it's talons did not meet the delicate neck of the frail rabbit.
It collided with the thick impenetrable hide of the cunning crocodile.
As the blade came down, in a single smooth movement Ren spun his full body with the sole of his feet to face the oncoming sword. Simultaneously he bent his knees and crouched down and angled his body upwards, widening his stance and digging his feet into the ground. The katana was now directly coming towards his face. And then he did the unthinkable.
Using his firmly planted feet to propel himself forward, he cranked his neck outwards and opened his mouth wide—
—And and bit down on Eizen's sword.
Hard.
*CRAAACKKK*
It was over in less than a second. Nobody made a sound, too astonished at what had just occurred in front of their eyes. It happened so fast that many present didn't even realised what had happened. Even Sagiri barely caught it and her jaw was slack with disbelief. However the most shocked was none other than Eizen himself, as he straightened up from his bent position that he gotten into for the beheading strike. And brought half of his broken katana infront of his face to inspect it, his mouth agape.
The remaining shattered half lay at Ren's feet. The only visible sign of damage on him were a few small surface level cuts on his lips and a larger slash wound on his right cheek from were the broken half of Eizen's katana still attached to the handle had grazed through.
Rising up he opened his mouth and let a few metal splinters fall from inside his mouth and spit out a glob blood. Wiping the flowing blood from the cut on his cheek Ren commented in the same casual tone he had been using earlier with Sagiri, as if nothing noteworthy had happened.
"And I hope that you understand, my loud-mouthed friend, that I'm not going to simply lay down and die just because you felt like it. You didn't even ask politely." Ren's voice was casual, even friendly, as he looked at the Shogun's retainer and said his piece.
But none of that friendliness reached his eyes.
They were cold and steely. A warning. Don't try something like this again, or you will regret it, his glare seemed to convey. And it appeared the message was recieved, as the Retainer's face paled and took a step back.
Then Ren flinched slightly and spit out some more blood.
"Ow! And damn you, you red-haired bastard! Not only did your katana tasted like crap, but also my tongue stings now! Now I'm going to forgo hot and spicy food for who knows how long because of this! Damn you!"
"He sounds more angry at that, than the fact that Eizen-dono tried to execute him."
A multitude of emotions swirled inside of Sagiri, fighting to express themselves. Three of them were more prominent than the rest. Disbelief and anger were expected, anger at the way the criminal had escaped the clutches of death and the insult he had just caused her mentor. And disbelief over the fact that he had somehow managed something humanly impossible by breaking tempered Asaemon forged steel with his bare teeth.
But she surprised herself with the emotion that she was feeling the strongest.
Relief.
She was feeling beyond glad that Kawasaki Ren has managed to survive.
"How in Kami's name did this strange man manage to make me care about his well-being so quickly?"
Her fellow Asaemon and the Shogun's soldiers however where not going through the same dilema she was. For most of them, it was clear which emotion was shining through.
"Who the hell do you think you are!?"
Many voices of outrage and shock called out to the grinning man, but the voice of the dark-skinned samurai Genji was the loudest amongst them all. Fiercely loyal to Eizen and someone who looks up to him greatly, it did not surprise Sagiri that he was the one to get the most aggravated .
He approached from the side, his right hand gripping his upper of his two katana tightly. As his steps thundered on the wooden platform, through scowling lips he yelled out once again. "You mangy stray dog! How dare you show such disrespect to Eizen-dono?! You-"
"Better than being a domesticated one, bushy eyebrows," Ren interrupts him smoothly as he himself walks up to Genji and faces him down. He was a good few inches shorter than the angry samurai but refused to break eye-contact. "My life is my own to live as I like. Unlike you sorry lot, wagging your tails and showing your fangs for your owners amusement."
Saying so, he spun on his feet and walked away from Genji. The dark-skinned samurai grit his teeth so hard that Sagiri could hear it from a few feet away. But she wasn't concerned about Ren. Genji was someone quick to anger, but she knew he was also someone of unquestionable honour who almost religiously worshipped and followed the Bushido Code (7.). He would never attack a man who has his back turned to him.
Ren continued walking and stopped a a few meters away from the elevated platform on which the Shogun and his personal guards stood, all with their spears and katanas raised and pointed at him. Having gotten the undivided attention of the Shogun himself, he raised his voice and spoke.
"You asked me who I am Bushy Eyebrows? I am the man who survived a beheading strike from the current top ranked Yamada Asaemon! I am the one who took his sword of death and had it for supper! I am the one who single-handedly took care of the Kashumidani Yakuza, and that too in a single night! You want to know who I am!?"
Pausing to spit out another glob of blood, he pointed a thumb at himself and continued his grandiose and theatrical speech. "Kawasaki is the name I inherited from my grandmother, but they call me Kowasu Ren where I come from! Ren the Breaker! Buildings, weapons, businesses, bones, doesn't matter what. As long as you can pay, I'm the one you call when you need something to break.
You sure that you don't want someone like me searching for your magic juice, big man?"
Once again complete silence reined in the camp, the only thing breaking the quiet being the waves of the sea. Everyones focus was on either Ren's grinning face or the Shogun's surprised one.
This was it. It was a do or die gamble that Ren had taken. He had directly challenged the Shogun's verdict. If the Shogun agreed to let him partake in the voyage, nobody could go against it. But if he instead decided that Ren was not worth the trouble, no matter how good of a fighter he was, he would not be able to survive a battle against multiple Ranked Asaemon and the royal guards.
The suspense didn't last long however. It started with a chuckle, which soon evolved into full fledged guffawing as the Shogun held onto his belly and laughed up-roaringly. Ren let out a quite exhale of relief, that Sagiri almost missed.
"So he's not completely unflappable, huh? Good to know even someone like him has limits."
In between his laughter the Shogun spoke. "Subarahi subarahi (8.)! Such blatant disrespect with no regard to self-preservation! Such bold claims and possession of immense skills to back them up! Hahahahah! I had pegged you as a coward, one who hides behind the skirts of women (Sagiri's left eye twitched) to avoid fighting, but maybe you are the bravest of them all! No not brave. You are mad! For instead of the convicts, you challenged me, the Shogun! Hahahahaha!
And that's what I need! Mad men ready to risk life and limb for my Elixir of Life! Forget the words of this fool," the Shogun continued speaking as he whacked his retainer with his hand-fan. "You must go to Shinsenkyo and get me my 'magic juice' as you called it! Hahahaha!"
"But your majesty!" The Retainer protested with a barely hidden grimace, rubbing his hand over where the wooden fan had hit him. "There are only ten ranked Asaemon present! And these convicts are all too dangerous for anyone of them to guard two of them simultaneously!"
Waving his fan as if to blow away his words, the Shogun simply said, "That does not concern me. I am sure there are some spares the Asaemon could use, I remember hearing something about promising members of the side dojo being present. Just use one of them! I don't care what you do or how you choose to do it, I order that this mad man be sent to the island as soon as possible!"
The Retainer but his lip and frowned. He clearly wanted to protest, but the Shogun had decreed an order. There was nothing to do now but follow it if he valued his job and life. So he turned to look at the leader of the Asaemon, who was still staring at his broken blade with a vacant stare in his eyes.
"You heard, didn't you Eizen-dono? Get someone capable ready to supervise Kirisaki Ren from the side dojo. Mourn for your katana later, get the job done quick! We will set sail at dawn!"
Then he yelled out the names of all the criminals about to go on the voyage, but Sagiri tuned it out. She had already memorised their names.
She instead focused on Eizen, who's eyes were still vacant and almost lifeless. He looked ready to collapse at the spot. Sagiri understood his feelings and sympathised with him, the Asaemon were taught from a young age that their katana's were sacred. That it contained their warrior spirit. Losing it or breaking your katana carelessly was considered a sign of weakness and having a shaky resolve in the Asaemon Clan. And for it to break in a single swing, that too in front of the Shogun and all of his students...
"For now, take the criminals back to their cells for the night and get their gear ready for tomorrow, brave Asaemons! And don't forget, no matter how what they look like or however they act, they are deadly killers! Scum of human society! Keep on your guard and keep their hands bound at all instances!"
Finally saying all he had to say, he Retainer turns his back to them and stared ordering the servants in the back to ready the Shogun's carriage. They had finished what they had come here to do.
"Foolish man, it's not only his katana, but also his broken pride that he is mourning for." Kisho said softly, but Sagiri could feel the anger radiating off him. Kisho was one of the more calm and level headed Asaemons, but the way he was tightly gripping his own blade and frowning showed the rage simmering just below the surface. He did not appreciate the Retainer belittling his elder, whom he greately respected.
Tenza, however had no reservations on letting his emotions take control. "That ungrateful bastard! He's the real scum to speak to Eizen-dono like tha-" His angry rant was interrupted by a chop to the back of his head. Rubbing his blonde head, he turned in annoyance hut his expression immediately bashful as he saw that it was none other than his mentor who had wacked him.
"I do not take kindly to the words of Koishi-dono either, but there is a time and place for passion. And this is not it, specially in ear-shot of the Shogun" said the blind samurai calmly. Shion was around the age of Eizen, but his premature white hair and the aura of wisdom he carried made him seem a lot older than he was. Even sage-like, Sagiri thought.
They hadn't interacted often, as being one of the higher ranked Asaemon meant he had many responsibilities for which he had to travel all over the land. But the few times they talked and trained together, she had come to greatly respect and like the man as he was one of the few who never acted against her due to any prejudice.
"I may have managed to curb out most of your recklessness and bad habits, but you are still much too rash for my liking. Learn to look before you jump, Tenza." Shion ended with a particular emphasis on a certain word. His student groaned loudly enough for Sagiri little snort to be concealed. At least that would have been the case for most, but Shion was much too perceptive for a blind man. He gave Sagiri a quick mischievous smile before focusing back on his student and she found herself feeling slightly self-conscious.
"... So I think puns are funny. What of it?"
Turing around to Eizen again, she finds Genji and Senta trying their best to cheer up their Mentor. Sagiri was glad to see that it seemed to be working as he had finally gotten some life back into his eyes and was actually taking back. Sagiri choose to stay back for the moment, seeing her might end up triggering him again. Taking in a deep breath, she finally turns to focus back on her own job. Sagiri needed to ignore the strange man for now and escort Gabimaru back to his holding cell for the night.
But it looked like fate had different plans. As it appears she was not the only one who wanted to interact with the shinobi when she turned to the direction she last saw him. It looked like Ren was in a middle of a conversation with her prisoner, with the kunoichi Yuzuriha close-by. Not a part of their chat, but listening to it anyways.
"-to order to keep our hands constantly bound is stupid and counter productive. Mendokusaiii...(9.)" The ever practical white-haired ninja commented with a long sigh at the end. Sagiri found herself agreeing, but she didn't say anything out loud. That was the rule issued in the name of the Shogun, which meant she had to follow it no matter what her personal opinions were on the matter.
"They probably didn't hire him for his big brain, but rather for his big vocal cords. Holy shit he's one loud fellow!" Ren's words were as flippant as ever. Gabimaru hummed at that, seemingly in agreement. The nervousness he showed while challenging the Shogun finally gone from his face. Sagiri found herself feeling glad that was the case, and then immediately reprimanded herself for thinking such a thought.
"That man is a criminal, who has brought dishonour upon your mentor. You should hate him," the logical part of her mind said to her. Sagiri frowned.
"... Then why can't I?" Why did the thought of his death made her feel... like this? Conflicted. Unsettled. Sagiri closed her eyes and took another deep breath. Calming herself. She needed to suppress these weird feelings by the time they reached the island, or her swordsmanship would suffer. She couldn't afford to be anything less than in perfect shape for tomorrow's mission.
In her mind's eye she imagined herself as a lake in a state of constant turmoil. For unknown reasons the waters were restless and noisy, unwilling to settle down. Waves, big and small, in continuous motion every direction one could see. And with her will she focused until the waves ceased.
Slowly but surely until all was silent. Until it was perfectly still. Serene. Calm. Tranquil. Proud of how quickly she took control of her emotions, Sagiri let a small smile grace her lips as she released the breath she was holding she opened her eyes and focused on what was happening a couple of meters away from her.
The smile froze on her face.
She felt her left eye twitch.
Ripples re-emerged on the surface of the lake. It was tranquil no longer.
Having said all he had to say, Gabimaru had walked a few feet away and was now looking at the setting sun, an almost forlorn expression on his face. Sagiri guessed that only thoughts of his wife could make the jaded killer look so melancholic. But that was not what she was currently focusing on.
Her eyes were fixed on the kunoichi leaning against Ren, with her chest pressing on his back and her right hand on his shoulder, with her left hand lightly trailing two fingers over his arms. And Ren simply staring back at her with a raised eyebrow, with a small smirk on his face.
"At least those dummies are are letting us take our weapons and equipment on this voyage of ours. Small mercies like this should be appreciated, I say! And speaking of things to appreciate..., " The scantly-clad woman gave a cheshire grin as her eyes unabashedly roamed over his figure as she licked her lips. "Breaking things are your specialty you say, no wonder, with arms this strong~~ But what about... hearts~?"
Such an overt display of lust was enough to cause the stoic, but prudish, Sagiri to blush through her annoyance. But the person under scrutiny showed no sign of shame or embarrassment or discomfort. Instead, Ren grinned widely and winked at the Kunoichi, which made the woman giggle sultrily. Sagiri felt a vein pop on her temple.
"Are we speaking literally or figuratively, my dear ninja?" He boldly flirted back at the purple ninja, not breaking eye-contact. Probably why Ren hadn't even noticed Sagiri approaching. The turmoil grew on the lake's surface, the waves now were bigger and crashing together more violently than ever before.
"Mmmmhhh~~ I like a man with a sense of humour. Specially the morbid kind..." The Kunoichi got scandalously close to Ren's ear and said in a low voice that Sagiri almost missed. "How 'bout on the island we ditch our guards and meet up and go find a cosy little cave to-"
That was the last straw for Sagiri. "Ahem." She walked up to them and coughed into her sleeve. It was a more aggressive sound than she was going for, but it did its job of capturing their attention, so she thought about it no further.
Ren at least had the decency to look embarrassed as he gave her an abashed smile while untangling from the Kunoichi. Yuzuriha on the other hand looked delighted at the interruption, which made Sagiri uneasy. She could tell, this purple woman was going to be troublesome.
"So you finally got bored of watching and decided to join in? Fun! Finally someone to have some girl-talks with~! The blond bimbo's too much of a stuck up to hang around, but you look fun! I've got bit of a reputation of being a home-wreaker, don't worry those are just rumors. Obviously~ Do I look like that kind of a woman to you? You have nothing to worry about!"
Yuzuriha suddenly bites her lower lip while looking her up and down like she was doing previously with the man next to her and Sagiri finds herself inexplicably flushing at the action. "Unless you're interested in adding a third party to the mix~ I certainly won't mind. Mmmm what I wouldn't have done to have been arrested by a total babe like you..."
Sagiri's confused anger at Ren was now replaced with embarrassment at those shameless words, spoken by a woman none the less!
"W-wha!? Pre-preposterous! W-why would I care about something like that? What a scandalous proposition! There is no home here to wreck! I-I'm simply here to keep an eye on you until Senta-dono finishes his talk and escorts you back to your cell!"
"Sagi-rin~! Don't you stuck-up samurai have your weird honour code that says lying is bad or something? What would your elders say if they saw you breaking your sacred code willy-nilly like this!?"
"I have spoken no lies and broken no code! Your accusation is completely baseless, Kawasaki Ren is just a convict, nothing more or nothing less! Ju-just because we had a bit of conversation doesn't give you the right to jump to any kind of conclusion! Specially the kind you came up with your perverted head!"
Yuzuriha's smile simply grows with each of Sagiri's denials. "Oh~ Doth thinks the madam protests too much! I was observing you, you know? You were cool as a cucumber for the whole thing until Ren-kun here showed his interest in you~~. I can tell you're the type that's good at staying stoic, what is so special about this man that he managed to make you break character, Sagi-rin~~~?"
"T-that was simply because he was aggravating me! Poking and prodding at me verbally to get reactions out of me! A-anyone would react how I did if they were teased so much! Answer her Kawasaki-dono and clear up whatever delusions this Kunoichi has wrapped her head around!"
"Oh yes~ We haven't heard anything from the man of honour yet! Please offer your insight on this most important matter, Ren-kuuun~"
The man in question looked at the two women staring at him intently, one face showing desperation and the other showing sadistic glee. For a few seconds the stare-down happened in silence.
Then Kawasaki Ren turned and ignored the two ladies to focus on the sunset.
"One of the first lessons my grandma taught me to never take sides in a squabble between women," bathed in the warm light of the setting sun, Ren spoke in a sagely voice, as if offering profound wisdom to them both. "No matter who wins, I will be the one to lose. Settle your differences on your own, brave samurai and cunning ninja. Ganbare!"
Sagiri let her head drop and let out a low groan while Yuzuriha cackled in glee. "With you two around to entertain me, this island trip might end up being not to boring after all!"
"You are not going on a vacation, you are on a mission from the Lord Shogun himself. A more serious disposition should be followed for a mission of this importance!" Sagiri scolded, looking over at both of them.
Yuzuriha and Ren stared back at her for a second, before looking at each others face. Then a similar grin sprouted on both their faces, and simultaneously they turned back to Sagiri and in perfect sync they drawled out, ""But where's fun in thaaaat~~?""
Sagiri pinched the bridge of her nose and let out a weary sigh and the two convicts in front of her giggled like school-children and high-fived each other.
Yamada Asaemon Sagiri was not having a nice day.
But she found herself not feeling as annoyed as she was expecting to be. And as she looked up at the smiling face of the man who had appeared out of no where and offered her praise and support and opened her eyes to new truths about her won self, her heart found itself wondering when was the last time she felt this... light. A burden had lifted from her soul, and it was mostly due to the dark-haired man in front of her.
Perhaps her day had not started off as well as it could have been. But as she looked at the sun finally sets beneath the gentle waves, Sagiri realized she didn't mind how it had ended. With the genuine laughter of a man who was neither her friend nor an enemy. But simply a person who saw another person in doubt, and offered a few kind words of encouragement.
"Kawasaki Ren" The sudden firmness in her voice cut their chortling short. Sagiri met his eyes again, and after a second... she smiled. For the first time in a long while, Sagiri let the mask drop briefly and let her emotions show on her face.
The smile was small but genuine. And in a voice that was equally as small, yet carrying emotions far bigger in magnitude, she let two simple words escape from her lips, which she should have said much earlier. Two words, said from the bottom of her deeply grateful heart, which she meant with all her being. Two words, that signified the beginning of the journey her heart would soon go on, that would change her life forever.
.
.
.
.
.
"Thank you."
Translation of Japanese words and phrases used;
(1.) Saya:- A Scabbard; specifically for a katana
(2.) Anata no tame ni hazukashī desu~:- Oh, how embarrassing for you~; Ren says this to mock Eizen
(3.) Gomen:- Sorry; "Gomen'nasai" means the same thing, but more formal
(4.) Arigatou:- Thanks
(5.) Ganbare:- Keep it up; generally said as encouragement to continue doing some activity
(6.) The Bushido Code:- The code of conduct that samurai were expected to follow; It consisted of mainly seven principles or ideals; Justice, Courage, Compassion, Respect, Loyalty, Honour and Self-Control
(7.) Subarashi:- Wonderful/Amazing; Used here by the Shogun to express his joy
(8.) Mendokusai:- Bothersome; Gabimaru uses it with a sigh to express his frustration at the stupidity of the Retainer's imposed law
After watching four or five episodes of Jigokuraku and with no more episodes airing at the time, I decided to try out the manga... Which resulted in me ending up binge reading all 13 volumes over the course of a weekend.
So riding on my high of just having finished a great story, my mind starts churning up story ideas and interactions and I sat on my computer and end up writing 3k words of this chapter straight. Then I go to sleep and wake up refreshed and realise none of my ideas work or mix well for a long term project, and my motivation to write more on this story slowly fizzles out.
But I had already written a big chunk and I don't want it to go to waste, so I tough it out and start writing every week after watching the anime episode that airs, and now here we are, at the completion of this one-shot.
I don't even remember if this was supposed to be an Isekai or an OC story, but I think it turned out well enough for the amount of effort I put into it. Hope you enjoyed reading my first ever completed and published chapter of fanfiction— Please review, comment and criticise, and thank you for taking the time to read my story; it means a lot to me.
And don't forget to keep your eyes out for my main works, my DxD and Fate/Grand Order fics! Those are my main stories and long term fics that I plan to work on and update on a regular basis, so definitely check them out!