I spilled half of my butterbeer as I struggled to sip casually, and I didn't care.

Teasdale gave me a single galleon for all the walking I did around town, and I didn't care.

A pebble got stuck in my shoe on my return trip to the castle, and I didn't care.

She only meant it as a friend, and I didn't care.

All I could do was smile and touch my cheek where Lyra had kissed me, as if I could still feel her there, as if her kiss left something tangible in its wake.

xxxxxxxxx

"Lyra, you're agitating the thestrals."

I was pacing back and forth in front of Natty and Poppy in the swamp vivarium. They each received my owl to meet me as quickly as possible – the ones I sent the second I got back to the castle from the Three Broomsticks. My reasoning is that neither Sebastian nor Ominis willingly goes into the swamp – even though Sebastian had taking a sleeping draught in the hospital wing and technically wouldn't be in any vivarium. I'm glad Poppy left his side for this.

"Yes, well, I agitated myself too," I snapped back, but stopped. I ran my hands through my hair for the tenth time, feeling how disheveled it was. "I may have done something… rash."

Natty looked confused. "With Garreth on the non-date at the Three Broomsticks? What did you do?"

"Erm, no," I said, fidgeting with the pockets of my cardigan. "With Ominis. I… kissed him."

Both of their mouths fell open, but their expressions were one of utter delight.

Natty exclaimed "Finally!" as she threw her hands up in the air at the same time Poppy said, "I knew it! Was he a good kisser?"

"No, no, no," I groaned, pacing again. "It's not like that. I kissed him on the cheek."

I saw them both deflate. "Oh," Poppy said blandly. "That's not what I thought you meant."

"Me neither," agreed Natty, "what happened, exactly?"

I started with the beginning, telling them about Garreth's plan, our not-a-date at the Three Broomsticks, Sebastian's owl, Ominis' arrival, and our conversation.

"…and then I left before he could react. I don't even know how he took it! What if things are weird now? I feel like such an idiot. I mean, I know I have feelings for him, but when I kissed him I really did mean it like a thank-you! His words just had that effect on me! But he might not see it that way, and he might be uncomfortable, and it's all my fault. He even said right before that my words were enough! I didn't need to do that!"

"Wingardium leviosa! Descendo!"

Poppy had summoned an outdoor stone bench next to me and forced me to sit down, which was probably for the best.

Natty spoke. "I believe there's good news, and there's bad news. The good news is, for your sake, I really think he took it as a thank you, considering that's what you whispered. To be fair, I wouldn't kiss him in lieu of gratitude," Natty admitted, "but you two are much closer."

"Okay, what's the bad news?"

"That you stopped at the cheek!" Poppy exclaimed.

"The bad news is," said Natty, talking over Poppy and sending her a look, "is that you're going to panic over this until you see him next, no matter what we say."

I put my head in my hands. "You know me so well."

Poppy moved from her bench to mine, patting my back comfortingly. "You know, there's a chance he didn't just see it as a thank you and actually liked it."

My voice was muffled as I spoke through my hands. "He literally just gave me that speech about how if someone cared about me, they wouldn't play with my feelings. I feel like if he fancied me, that would have been the time for him to say something."

Natty sighed and sat on the other side of me. "Maybe, but I stand by what I told you weeks ago. Boys are idiots. Either way, I don't think you should prepare for the world to end just yet. See how he acts the next time he's around you. If he seems cold, distant, and short with you, you might need to talk about it. If he acts like nothing's different, chances are he's fine and you can stop harping on this."

I didn't know what else I could possibly do. I slowly lifted my head up and put my hands back on my lap. "You're right," I said defeatedly, "I just have to wait."

Poppy began to fidget slightly. "Also, and I don't mean to bring up another uncomfortable issue, but don't you think you're going to have to talk to Sebastian?"

"About kissing his best friend?" I asked, horrified.

"No, of course not!" Poppy said, waving away my idea. "About sending you an owl when he really didn't have to. Ominis was right when he gave you that speech – feelings or not, he shouldn't have done that."

"Oh," I recalled, "that. First of all, thanks for looking after him, Poppy."

She beamed. "Of course! Although, I may have laid on a tad thick," she confessed, "I thought it was odd he sent the letter to you, too."

"It's fine," I reassured her, "but I have to see him in that hospital wing and say…" I searched for the words. "Well, I can't just say 'stop being jealous and protective,' because that sounds like I'd be starting a fight."

Natty raised her hand, "For the record, I am in support of you starting a fight."

I shot her a look and continued thinking aloud. "Okay, something like, 'I'm sorry I couldn't walk you to the hospital wing, but you knew I was out of the castle with Garreth. There were so many people you could have contacted, so why me?'"

Natty scratched her neck, considering my idea. "I guess that's better, but I'm not sure you need to apologize. He should be the one apologizing to you."

I nodded. "Right. Okay." I turned back to Poppy. "Out of curiosity, when do you think he'll wake up from that sleeping draught?"

She tapped her chin. "Nurse Blainey said it would knock him out for two hours, so he should be coming to in about half an hour. Plenty of time for us to plan out what to say."

xxxx

Forty-five minutes later I entered the hospital wing, and Nurse Blainey was there to show me to Sebastian's bed.

"Yet another visitor, Mr. Sallow," she said, "you're popular."

I saw Sebastian's eyes light up as he recognized me, and he sat up straighter in his bed. He looked perfectly fine – there was color in his cheeks and showed no signs of lingering symptoms.

"How are you feeling?" I asked him, not wanting to open the conversation with accusations.

"Oh, I'm fine now. Nurse Blainey said if I'm up to going to dinner in an hour, she'll release me. But that's neither here nor there. I need to tell you something."

"But, Sebastian-" I said, trying to have and end this conversation as soon as possible.

"No, please, this is important," he said, talking over me. "I shouldn't have sent you the owl."

I felt the breath whoosh out of my lungs as the speech I had taken so long to prepare suddenly became unnecessary. Instead I sat silently, waiting for him to continue. He sighed. "I tend to get… overprotective of my friends, but with you, it's different."

My heart started doing some nervous exercises, not expecting it to go this way so soon. I didn't like the idea of him bravely sharing his intimate feelings while I had to lamely respond with something along the lines of I'm sorry, I don't feel the same way.

His voice brought me back to reality. "It's because when I look at you, I can't help but think of Anne." Relief filled my chest as he kept speaking. "I don't have my twin sister in my life anymore, and I suppose I inadvertently put you in her place. Ever since our parents died, I always felt the need to look out for her and keep her safe. I… obviously failed in that regard. You're like my second chance." He shook his head and got back to the matter at hand. "I saw Weasley looking at you in potions, and I remembered when he got you in trouble with Sharp during your first class. I didn't want it to happen again; I suppose that's why I glared. As for today…" his cheeks flushed and he absentmindedly started bunching up his fists in the sheets, "I know you said it wasn't a date, but I was afraid he would try to make it one. I didn't think he was good enough for you, and I was afraid of you getting hurt in some way. When I got sick, I sent you the owl to cut it short. I wasn't thinking about how it would affect you – how I might be spoiling a genuinely good time with a friend." He gave me a small apologetic smile.

I returned it, but there were still some things that need to be addressed. "I accept your apology, but I need to know: did you drink a bad potion on purpose?"

His face turned an even deeper shade of red, and he broke eye contact. "I wasn't going to. I was making a potion for class, and when I realized I made a mistake, I made an impulsive decision."

I crossed my arms. "That was an extremely stupid move, and I hope you realize that now."

He gestured to himself lying on the hospital bed. "Trust me, I do. It wasn't worth it."

I cocked my head to the side, unsure of how to ask my next questions. "But Sebastian… what if it was a date? What if I told you that I fancied Garreth and that's why we were meeting for butterbeer? Would it be 'worth it' to you then?"

I saw alarm in his eyes as he began to stutter out a reply. "Do you? Was it- no. No. It was wrong to do in any situation, date or not a date. I'm sorry."

"Just one last question," I took a deep breath and my hands wrinkled my skirt as they gripped the fabric nervously. "This has nothing to do with jealousy, does it?"

Sebastian threw back his head and laughed, much to my surprise. "The day I'm jealous of Garreth Weasley is the day pigs fly. I told Ominis the same thing. I know we're just friends."

"Ominis?" I asked, alert.

"Oh, yeah. He left probably five minutes before you came in. He told me he saw you and Garreth at the Three Broomsticks, and scolded me about my behavior. He said I was being an absolute idiot and needed to apologize to you right away. I was going to do that already, of course," he added hastily at the end.

I couldn't help but smile at the thought of Ominis defending me, and I nodded. "I forgive you, Sebastian, but for your sake and mine you have to trust me. If I can take down a goblin rebellion, I can handle a teenage boy with ill intentions if I need to. Promise me you won't do something this rash again."

"Normally I'd say you're asking too much," he joked, but then saw the look on my face, "but I won't, of course. I promise."

xxxx

"This is humiliating," I grumbled, adjusting my helmet, which still felt too big.

"Tell me about it. I," Natty agreed. "I'm looking down and I can see I missed a buckle on this boot, but I can't bend far enough to fix it."

The Monday after the Three Broomsticks, we walked into Hecat's class with pillows and mattresses scattered around the room – there were even some stuck on the walls. Hecat was right about practicing dueling more often this year, but this week we were focused on spells that could move our bodies – depulso, flipendo, levioso, and descendo.

"If you have been hit by one of these spells," Professor Hecat argued, "you know how nauseating and anxiety-inducing it can be. When caught unaware, it can cause vertigo or motion sickness. Then there's the feeling of landing, or falling. The more you practice, the less you feel these things over time."

She then instructed us to put on protective suits with extra padding to keep us safe, and essentially told us to have at it.

I bent down to Natty's shoe – as I hadn't put on the middle part of the suit that makes bending difficult – and buckled it for her. "Could you imagine if we wore this while fighting Harlow? He would have died of laughter before being taken away to Azkaban."

She snickered. "I couldn't blame him. Partners?"

"We can't," I pointed out as I continued putting on my suit, "we were partners on Friday, remember? And she doesn't let us fight the same people back to back. 'Keeps us on our toes,'" I said, quoting Hecat from earlier this year.

"Alright then, I'll fight Sallow!"

I sighed at her eagerness, but let her pass. She may still be a little upset at Sebastian's owl scheme, even though I told her he apologized and I forgave him. She waddled toward Sebastian and tapped him with her wand.

"Do you need a partner?"

I nearly jumped and spun around to see Ominis, suit tucked under his arm, patiently waiting for a reply – after sneaking up behind me. "Yes, but Merlin, don't sneak up on me! If you give me a heart attack before a duel, it doesn't count as winning."

He gave me his signature small smile and put his hands up in the air. "I'm simply helping you hone your sense of awareness. Give me a moment to climb into this, then."

And we're behaving as normal! I couldn't exactly cheer, but I could finally relax. Nothing odd or uncomfortable here, just two friends doing classwork together. I know Natty would hit me with "I told you so," later, but I didn't care.

He managed to get into the suit quicker than I anticipated, but I couldn't hold back a giggle when he put on the helmet.

He frowned. "What? Do I look silly?"

"We all do," I reassured, "but at least yours looks like it fits perfectly. My helmet still feels loose."

"Well, we can't have that," he said, concern in his voice as he walked closer to me. "These are the helmets players use in quidditch, they can adjust. Did you find the miniature straps?"

I sighed wearily. "What miniature straps?"
Ominis chuckled and held out his hands. "Here. Lift your chin up."

I did as he asked, heart beating faster as I could sense his hands coming closer to me. Using both hands, he found my chin, then started tracing his fingers up the strap that held the bottom half in place – it went from ear to ear from under my chin. "Hmm, one moment." I imagined his brow furrowed as he tried again, and when his fingers accidentally brushed my skin in their search, I found myself closing my eyes.

"Oh!" he laughed, "the chin strap is flipped. The miniature ones to adjust are probably pressing against your skin. How can you not feel it?"

I wanted to retort that I wouldn't feel a billywig sting right now with him so near, but I went with "Whoops. I'm not sure." He flipped the main chin strap, then tugged on the miniature ones to tighten the helmet. "Better?" he asked, stepping away with a bemused expression on his face.

"Yes, thank you. Wait…" I should have realized something was missing when I felt his fingertips. "Where are your gloves?"

He clicked his tongue. "Probably back by my books. Accio!" His gloves came floating toward him, and he caught them and deftly put them on. "All right, ready to go?"

"Hold on, you missed a buckle on one of them," without any warning, I took his right hand and trailed my fingers to the one he missed, by his wrist. "There," I said airily, then cleared my throat. "Ready to go."

The goal was to let ourselves get hit by the spells, but when Ominis first cast levioso, I used protego on instinct. "Sorry! Habit! Try again."

This time, I let levioso hit me, and I felt my body rise up in the air. For the first split second, I felt my stomach drop at the lack of control my body had, but then I just felt weightless. "I'm going to bring you down now, Lyra!" I heard Ominis call, and I then felt myself descending slowly and gracefully. I was grateful for it, but it technically wasn't the point of the exercise.

"Okay," I swallowed, becoming more nervous. "Now depulso."

I saw Ominis tap his wand. "Actually, can you do levioso on me first?"

I shrugged, but happy for the momentarily delay. "Sure. Levioso!" I found myself smirking when Ominis also instinctively used protego. "See! It's a tough habit to break! Trying again." This time, I managed to get him in the air, and I could recognize similar emotions in his experience – I could see the initial confusion and surprise, then I saw him try to get his body to relax when he realized he couldn't fight it. "Okay, letting you down now!" I hesitated when I cast descendo. I didn't give him as gentle as a fall as he did for me, but I still made a noticeable difference, and he landed on his feet with ease.

Once he was on the ground, I made us readjust; I had him stand in front of me, and I made sure my back was lined up with a mattress on the wall, ensuring I wouldn't be hitting brick or stone. "Alright, I'm ready," I said, my hands clamming up. Ominis also looked nervous from what I could see. I saw him ready his wand, and I squeezed my eyes tight, trying to brace myself to go flying. "Depulso!"

It felt like someone gave me a push, as it only knocked me back three steps. I didn't even fall. I let out my breath. "Ominis, I know you would never actually try to hurt me, but you're going to need to put more force into it."

"Right, right. Sorry," he said, exhaling. He got back into position. "Ready?"

I nodded, and willed myself to keep my eyes open. "Depulso!"

This time, I felt the wind get knocked out of me as I went sailing through the air, my back making contact with the mattress. I gave an audible oof as I bounced slightly and fell to the ground. "I'm fine!" I called out before he could worry. I walked back to where I originally stood in front of him. "Flipendo now, please."

"Merlin," he muttered under his breath, "Here goes. Flipendo!"

Yet again, I felt my breath leave my lungs as I flew backward, but this time my head spun as I did two rotations before hitting the mattress. That was definitely the worst one of the four – for some reason, maybe because of my flips, it definitely hurt more than depulso. As I got up, my knees started to shake, and my legs felt like jelly. "Okay, that one will probably take the most time to get used to," I admitted, attempting to walk normally back to Ominis.

His face was full of concern. "You sound out of breath. Here, take a break – cast at me now."

I conceded as we switched places, me double checking he was indeed lined up with the wall mattress. I got into a stance the best I could, and I could feel myself hesitate again. I realized I really didn't want to do this; I didn't want to hurt him. I would feel terrible if something went wrong, despite all the soft surfaces and padded gear. Was this what was going through his head earlier?

I heard him quietly laugh before he threw my own words back at me. "Lyra, I know you would never actually try to hurt me, but you're going to need to put more force into it."

"Rolling my eyes," I narrated, but I saw his point. I took a deep breath. "Depulso!"

Ominis went sailing backwards just as I had, and I heard him make a similar noise as he hit the mattress. "So that's what that feels like," he muttered, smoothing down his suit as he got up. "I can't say that was pleasant, but it wasn't as bad as I thought." He stood in position once more, bracing himself for flipendo. "Ready."

I cast nervously, but my aim was true. "Flipendo!" Just like me, he made two full rotations before hitting the mattress. Unlike me, he emitted a small shout as his body began to turn, but I attribute that to his lack of vision as he went upside down. He reached out and supported himself on the mattress as he stood up and regained his footing. "That was terrible!" he said, a look of horror growing on his face, "Did I really do that to you?"

"Oh, it's alright!" I said, trying to reassure him. "It's going to get easier with time."

"That doesn't exactly make me feel better about it!" He said, cross. He returned to where I was standing with such an irritated look on his face, it surprised me. "Let's go back to levioso," he muttered.

I crossed my arms, feeling myself starting to get annoyed. "Fine, but we have to go back to the hard ones eventually, you know."

I saw him clench his jaw, and I felt my irritation grow. How was this my fault? If he has a problem with knocking me backwards he should have asked someone else. And it's not like we were intentionally trying to hurt each other. I saw him ready his wand, and I put my hands by my sides, not saying anything. I'm not going to soothe whatever bad feeling he has about this.

"Levioso!" I felt myself shoot up, but my body didn't have as strong as a reaction. This may be because it was second time being levitated, or simply because anything felt better than flipendo. I got my bearings a lot quicker, and I soon called out to Ominis. "Alright, I'm ready to be let down now!"

When he didn't respond and I stayed afloat, I looked down and tried again. "Ominis? You can use descendo now."

I saw him smile and twirl his wand between his fingers. "I don't know, I think you might need another minute or two to really understand how it feels."

I gaped at him. "Let me down! So help me Ominis Gaunt, let me down or I'll-"

He smirked. "Or what? You can't do anything about it right now."

I realized he was stalling for time, not wanting to do anything more dangerous. But I didn't want a bad grade in class because of his fears. I sputtered out, "This isn't funny!"

He chuckled and crossed his arms, looking at ease. "I beg to disagree."

I huffed. "You know, I can expect this nonsense from Sebastian, but I didn't think-"

"Descendo!"

In the next moment, I felt myself fall down to the ground, the way the spell would normally work, but I still managed to land on my feet. I stomped over to where Ominis was standing, the smile now wiped clean off his face. His hands were in his pockets, looking timid as he heard my angry footsteps approach him.

"What the hell?" I asked him angrily. "Are you really that unwilling to be my partner?"

"What? No!" His eyes widened in surprise as he put his palms out in defense. "That's not what I meant by that at all-"
I still advanced another step. "Then we're going to have to do the work! I don't know why you're so mad at me-"

He put a hand on my shoulder, and it silenced me. I hated that even when I was annoyed by him, his touch still affected me the way it did. Even though I wanted to yell, I also wanted him to not let go, to put his hand on my other shoulder, and to pull me closer.

Instead, he let go, putting his arm at his side. "I'm sorry. I just… you were perfectly willing to be hit, defenseless, by a spell that could hurt you. And I'm not Sebastian," he added quietly.

I felt the tension and irritability leave my body as I understood. That was, essentially, what happened in front of the scriptorium.

"Hey," I said much more calmly, reaching out my own hand to lay what I hoped was a reassuring touch on his upper arm. It had occurred to me just then how often we had touched in this class alone, but neither of us had pulled away too fast with obvious discomfort. "this is far from an unforgiveable curse."

He swallowed and nodded. "You're right. I'm sorry."

"Lyra! Ominis!" I heard Natty call my name from a small distance away, and I let go of Ominis' arm, suddenly aware of the other students around us. "Look how many times I can flip Sebastian!"

We walked over to where a small crowd was gathering around the pair, standing far away, but still lined up with, a wall mattress. "Alright, I'm ready. Go!" Sebastian said, smiling from ear to ear.

Natty was all too eager to oblige. "Flipendo!"

The entire class counted six flips before Sebastian came down, and he didn't mind one bit that he lost his breakfast shortly after.