Additions to the family

"I don't know what you were so worried about. These summons are delightful," Isobu commented in a tone that was way too earnest for him not be serious.

Rather than sigh again, I threw some cut-up fruit in my mouth as tried not to stare at the boss summon.

Ishigame. That was his name.

Well, he definitely looked like a stone turtle. His shell was grey and textured, overgrowths of for me undefinable origins covered any patterns that one would expect to find. Though he was significantly bigger than the pond turtles he shared his name with – his head was taller than me. Which made it quite disturbing to watch him eat.

Giant aloe vera plants were apparently a thing in the realm of turtles, which was named Ryugu, by the way.

Unsurprisingly, the vast majority of the realm was under water. I landed on the only island around, a huge jungle that only cleared up a tiny bit in the middle when the mountain peek made for an unsustainable environment for most plants. Though apparently there were quite a few rivers and lakes around here. For the freshwater turtles.

Kameyama, Turtle Mountain, was the island-and-totally-not-a-gigantic-turtle called. (There was no way in hell this didn't turn out to be a giant turtle. I watched Avatar before; I know these kinds of tropes.)

I sat on a flat stone across from Ishigame who was half laying on the beach and half floating in the ocean. Some of the smaller turtles had brought me pillows and fruit snacks. They even made me tea, something that had me questioning reality more than anything in a long time.

They did not have thumbs. How did they make tea.

Meanwhile, Ishigame told me about the realm, the turtles, himself, the contract, … - anything and everything basically. There was no hostile questioning, no test or anything. (-Fanon lied to me!)

Having lived in the deeply distrustful, cut-throat shinobi world for decades now, I was not used to this anymore.

But well, - it was kind of nice. And the tea was good.

"Dear me," Ishigame said after a good hour of talking. "I have been talking non-stop. Excuse me, I do tend to ramble in my old age. You youngsters must be terribly bored by now. It has just been so long since I've had students come here. Well, you know, it isn't long for our kind, but ever since that contract we never had such a long time of quiet- Ah, see! I'm doing it again."

"Don't worry, I don't mind," I assured the old turtle with a smile. He did have a nice voice and I couldn't say that I didn't learn a lot from his monologue. Though he did leave me with a lot of questions.

"How nice of you, but still. It isn't good manners to talk at someone who can't talk back."

At my visible confusion he added: "I'm talking about your partner. One of Hagoromo's children I believe?"

He dropped that bomb with such casualty that I had trouble keeping a straight face. I likely wasn't. Isobu wasn't in a much better state.

"How- What. Why, wa-," I stuttered.

"Pardon?"

The turtle looked up from his meal and tilted his head in question.

"How do you know that? And how did you know the sage by name?" I managed to ask coherently after a couple of seconds of trying to keep up with these plot twists.

I barely remembered that name, probably wouldn't even have recognized it if it hadn't been for some of my conversations with Isobu. Next to no one actually referred to that man (?) by name.

"Silly human. Because his family nearly wrecked the entire planet. And to call him just sage would be horribly unspecific. He wasn't the first one, he was not even the most powerful one," Ishigame explained patiently.

I stared at him as my brain computed his answer. Well, I couldn't dispute the first part. His clan and their descendants were seemingly always the center of all the drama. Isobu may grumble in mild offence at that thought but he did not disagree. But more importantly-

"He wasn't the first?"

"Of course not!" Ishigame huffed. "We turtles have been practitioners of Senjutsu long before that young whippersnapper came along and made it all popular. And then the frogs were so proud of their sages! As if they didn't have ones a long time ago already. Well, you can't be too mad at them for that perception, I guess. Oh, you wouldn't know, let me give you a quick history lesson, little one."

I mouthed "young whippersnapper" in utter amazement.

'You were totally right, delightful. These are probably the only summons that would and could call the Sage that,' I told Isobu.

My friendly dragon turtle stayed silent.

'Isobu?'

"Excuse me while I question my existence for a bit," Isobu numbly replied.

Fair enough.

Ishigame's history lesson wasn't quick, but it was certainly informative.

The clans of animals that would later become summons existed long before any humans could, well, summon them. It was their relation to chakra, more specifically nature chakra, that made them aware. Senjutsu was the logical next step.

Over thousands of years, more than a few sages of different clans came to be. However, training to become a sage was risky, especially if you had no one to guide you. And clans could go generations before the next sage came around. So, the practice died out. Too much risk, too little reward.

Conflicts between clans were less common than they were in the human world anyway. For example, what use would the turtles have for an eagle's territory?

And as time passed, the knowledge of Senjutsu became lost within many clans. Some rediscovered it but only a handful were long-lived enough to have never forgotten the way of the sage in the first place. As the elder turtle told it, only their clan and the tortoises had lives long enough. And the tortoises – well…

"Our brethren clan is certainly…," Ishigame hesitated for a long moment, seemingly unable to find the right words.

"… special. Very special," he decided on.

I was tempted to ask but then again. It was Gai's summon. It was probably better to remain ignorant. Gai's claim of a friendly rivalry between the summon clans rung through my head and all of a sudden that sounded suspiciously like how Gai talked about Kakashi.

"So, if you don't mind me asking, how old do turtles become exactly?"

That question had been bugging me for a while now.

Ishigame cocked his head and hummed in thought.

"I am the oldest turtle at the moment. I am a good, ahh, I would say 10.000 years old right now? Give or take a few centuries."

My eyes nearly bulged out of my head.

"Huuh?!" Isobu helpfully contributed.

As a comparison: Isobu was a bit under 1.000 years old. No wonder Ishigame called the Sage a young whippersnapper.

"Oh, we have gotten off topic once again! Thank you for indulging an old teacher but we should really work on getting your partner to be able to participate in the conversation."

I nodded, ignoring the slight voice in the back of my head that kept repeating "What the fuck." that may or may not have sounded like a certain biju.

"Actually, I had an idea about that."

I perked up now that our talk reached an area that I was familiar with.

"See, I thought I could make a shadow clone with a majority of Isobu's chakra. With how I constructed the seal, there should be nothing that hinders him from taking control of that clone's consciousness," I explained my theory to the ancient summon in front of me.

Ishigame listened to me with a patient expression.

"Then do try it out. I am not personally familiar with that version of the clone jutsu, but you seem to have a good grasp of the mechanics involved," he advised.

Oh, well. Now I felt a bit stupid for not realizing sooner that he was unlikely to know the jutsu variant. It had been an invention of the second Hokage, after all, and one that had been jealously guarded by Konoha.

I readied myself and sat up straighter.

"Ready?" I murmured to Isobu and closed my eyes.

I received a wave of his chakra as an answer, which I immediately used to form a very familiar stream of chakra. A simple hand sign later and -

A nearly imperceptible displacement of air in front of me made me open my eyes. I gasped.

"Oh my, you are adorable!"

If that came out as a squeal, neither Isobu nor I were keen to admit it.

"Takeshi!" Yuuma called out and waved at me.

The elderly fisherman looked surprised but happy to see me. I steered towards him with a smile, deftly making my way through the crowded marketplace.

"As you see, I took your suggestion," I greeted Yuuma and nodded in acknowledgment at Tarou who was still busy setting up their stand but took the time to wave.

"Wonderful! I nearly didn't recognize you with your hood up I have to admit," he laughed and his eyes crinkled.

"Yeah, I thought it would be more inconspicuous with my new companion," I explained.

I reached up to my hood and sat it back a bit, just enough for Isobu's head to stick out.

Turned out, the chibi version of a 1.000-year-old chakra construct was unbelievably cute. In my admittedly biased opinion.

Isobu's reaction to me fussing over him varied between being (adorably) embarrassed and hiding his head in his shell and trying to snap at me. Which was slightly terrifying because he looked a lot like a snapping turtle at this size.

My description would be that he looked like an alligator snapping turtle but at the size of a common snapping turtle. He could comfortably fit on my head, something that was definitely by design and that he took full advantage of.

"Hello, I'm Isobu," my friend introduced himself shyly before hiding in the shadow of my hoody again.

…

Did I mention that I found him incredibly cute like this?

As I tried not to let my inner animal-enthusiast show in fear of what might happen to my ears - which were in snapping distance - should Isobu catch wind of it, I turned my attention back to the father-son duo.

Tarou had frozen in the middle of setting out another crate of fish and was staring at my hood with wide eyes and a gaping mouth. His father was only mildly surprised.

"A summon, huh? It has been a long time since I have seen one of those," he told me. "Probably good then. The children would be all over a talking turtle. Isobu would not get a moment to himself."

Yuuma laughed as he imagined the sight that would make, and I grinned too.

"Don't you dare," mumbled Isobu crossly in my ear.

"Don't worry, buddy," I assured him and reached up with a finger to softly pet his head.

Yes, he liked head scratches now. I did not bring that up in conversation. As long as I didn't acknowledge it, Isobu would be content to let it happen despite his pride.

"Anyway, I am glad you came."

"How could I not after you mentioned that there would be a stand with traditional musical instruments from Uzushiogakure!"

Especially after one of said instruments sounded suspiciously like a guitar, something I had yet to see in the Elemental Nations.

"Ah yes, I'll be glad to show you around the market. Tarou, can you man the stand for a few hours?" Yuuma turned to his son who was already waving away any concerns.

"Of course, pops. I have been selling fish since I was 12. I'll survive."

He snorted out a laugh and shooed us away.

"Ungrateful child," Yuuma huffed but his smile betrayed his words.

I shook my head and followed the elderly fisherman as he gave me a tour around the marketplace. We came across a number of smaller stalls that sold little trinkets and decorations that, Yuuma pointed out, had originated in the now eradicated shinobi village.

I bought a few, some for myself and some more for Kushina. I was sure she would be thrilled. I recognized a lot of them from Mito-baa-chan. My favorite was a sort of dreamcatcher made with complicated knots and lots of seashells and glass. Mito had explained to me that they were designed to jingle gently in the sea breeze in your bedroom window. She always had one hung up in her room and it gave her the feeling of waking up back in her old home.

Finally, we reached a small shop just outside the open market. When I say small, I mean that I had to duck to enter. I froze in my tracks as soon as I got a good look at the instruments.

"As you can see, one of the most popular instruments was this one. It is kind of like a shamisen but with six strings instead of three. The body is bigger, and the hole has something to do with how different it sounds. The baichi is also a lot smaller," Yuuma explained, clearly struggling a bit with his lack in musical knowledge.

"So, basically it isn't like a shamisen at all?" I asked dryly.

I sent him a look so deadpan that he rubbed the back of his head in an embarrassed manner.

"Well, … no," he admitted.

No shit, grandpa. That was a fucking guitar. What was a guitar doing in the Elemental Nations?

Inwardly, I was screaming and questioning my existence while I outwardly pretended to listen to the merchant, apparently an old friend of the fisherman, prattle on about his wares and their history. I couldn't even calm down by venting towards Isobu, one of the few downsides of his new form. (It was scary how quick I had become used to his presence in my mind.)

Thoughts ran through my head at a thousand miles per second. Could this just be a coincidence? Or was this another Uzumaki-oddity?

"I'll take that one," I somewhat rudely interrupted the conversation between Yuuma and his merchant friend (they had moved from talking about the merchandise to bragging about their grandchildren at this point) and pointed at a plain guitar.

"Oh, of course. We also have some scrolls about how to-," the merchant fell back in his usual spiel.

I waved him away, impatient.

"I know how to play; it has been some time but I'm sure it'll only take a few hours of playing until I get back into it."

Now that the panic had retreated somewhat, I was excited.

It had been decades since I got to play the guitar. I had tried other instruments after Mito-baa-chan had taken me in, who herself was an enthusiastic player of the koto. Could not relate. A beautiful sounding instrument but not the choice for someone who needed two decades of practice before being decent at playing guitar – which had less than half as many strings.

Even a ninja-physique and chakra bullshit did not make me a musical prodigy.

My excitement seemed to be contagious. I felt Isobu's tail wag at the back of my head. This was going to be fun.

"- ridin' past the best and there is still no rest, and there is still -"

It was looking good for my haphazard plan to have Zetsu (and the rest of the shinobi world) think that I had lost my marbles.

My way home was utterly delightful. It took me a day of practicing, but I got back into the groove pretty quickly. Isobu and I proceeded to practice our new duo-energy extensively.

Now, picture this. A fairly tall man with extremely long fire red hair. His clothes were extremely unusual, somewhere between modern streetwear and traditional Japanese clothing. He was playing an unfamiliar instrument. On his head sat a turtle. Man and turtle sang with passion but it came across as total gibberish.

… Good thing our duo was also fairly practiced in the art of not giving a fuck.

I was somewhat ashamed to admit that I only noticed that Isobu had no problem singing along in foreign languages, e.g. English, French, Spanish and German, when I started singing something other than English. I asked him.

"I was in your mind, idiot. I only know and understand what you know."

I gave him a slightly bewildered look at that. I had not known that. I tried to avoid thinking too much about the implications of my friend's statement. Well, it was encouraging to know that his Spanish pronunciation would be just as bad as mine.

Our return to Konoha took about twice as long as the way to Uzushiogakure. Time well spent.

The Chunin on gate duty definitely gave me a judgy side-eye when I reentered. Not that it stopped either Isobu or me. I barely took my hand long enough off my guitar to wave at them.

…

If I walked slow enough, I thought, we could get halfway through another rendition of Isobu's favorite Orville Peck album.

Minato stared at me.

I shuffled a bit from side to side.

He stared some more.

This felt way too familiar. To be fair, this time he wasn't so much staring at me in disbelief but more so at what was on my head. Or rather, whomst.

"Is he always like this? It's kind of creepy," Isobu broke the silence.

I had to repress a snort. The turtle was just being a little shit. He knew exactly what was going on with Minato.

Being called creepy by an immortal chakra construct that hid as a nin-turtle sent Minato into a sputtering fit. He wasn't quite capable of forming whole sentences just yet though. Instead, he buried his face in his hands and groaned.

I leisurely raised my hand and softly scratched Isobu's head, an action that drew a whimper out of the dignified Hokage.

Being the crazy in-law was a lot of fun, I decided.

I was still in the middle of my secret gloating when a certain whirlwind entered the vicinity. The door flew open with a bang and Kushina crashed onto my back with a cry of joy.

"You're back! Finally! How was it, why did you take so long, did you get me something, do you have your contract-," she fired off without pause, completely ignorant of how pale Minato went when Isobu wobbled on my head for a second after the impact.

"Fun, reasons, of course and if you shut up for a sec, I can introduce you to my partner Isobu," I cut off her rant.

She clung to my back like a koala, only blinking once when she raised her head and made direct eye contact with Isobu who had turned around.

"Hello. Nice to meet you," Isobu awkwardly greeted her.

Kushina reacted with a squeal not unlike the one I had let out upon seeing my shy turtle buddy for the first time. Family resemblance.

"So polite! Are you sure about being my brother's summon?"

"How about you climb down so I can give you a proper hug before you try to talk him out of that, hm?" I huffed, mildly offended at the insinuation.

Coming from Kushina of all people. The gall.

She laughed at me and let go. I spread my arms in an invitation and she used it to ever so slightly crush my ribs. Hugs were a dangerous thing in the shinobi world.

I took a moment to take in her familiar bright chakra, - only to pause. Again, I wasn't a sensor by any means but if I knew anyone's chakra, it was hers.

… and it felt – different?

"Nii-san?"

I shushed her, trying to get a better feel for the change. It seemed to stem from… her stomach?

I cocked my head and stared very intensely at a speck of dust in my line of sight, trying to figure out what was going on.

Behind me, Minato was starting to move in his seat.

"Ah, Takeshi, there was something we have to tell you, haha," he laughed nervously.

"Hm? Oh! Oh, ha!" Isobu contributed, I could feel him chuckling.

I calmly let go of my sister and sent her a warm smile before turning around.

Facing my future brother-in-law, my expression was anything but gentle.

"Minato, I have a simple question for you," I started off in a sickly-sweet tone. "Did you or did you not get my Imooto pregnant while I was out of the village?"

Minato sent a desperate glance at his fiancé. Kushina just shrugged, not showing much concern for her future husband.

"Er, yes?"

"Minato, why don't we test out which of us is faster, hm? For science, of course."

"Haha, er-"

"Run."

AN:

Lore. So much lore.
Which is why this chapter took so long. Lots of googling. And not all of it was for important stuff. Like Ishigame's name. Took way to long for that but at least it kind of fits with canon naming tactics.
Feel free to ask questions concerning said lore in the comments. Some is canon, some is made up by yours truly. Trying to explain all of it would have clogged up my end notes too much.
Btw, why did I always think that there was no chakra in the Elemental Nations before the whole Kaguya disaster? Maybe my brain just refused to remember most of the Kaguya related stuff…
We have another chapter worth of fun and fluff to go but then it's getting serious, hehe.

Oh yeah, the line that Isobu and MC were singing there is from No Glory in the West (by Orville Peck of course).