authors note - short chapter to give an idea of what the story is about. all events of twilight are the same. timeline wise we are right before Bellas birthday in newmoon.

obv all things recognizable belong to their creator, i own nothing.

There are six scars on his face. Most people wouldn't notice, especially since he keeps a good distance from humans. I noticed though. Probably because I spent so much time subtly staring at him. The scar right above his left eyebrow is my favorite to stare at. I'm not really sure why. I noticed it first, one of the few times he stood close enough for me to see it, when he was flooding me with his own emotions, telling me I was worth it. The emotions were friendly, maybe even familial in nature, but when I stared into his eyes, absorbing the words and emotions he was sending me, something deep inside my body shifted.

He was all I could think about. All I could dream about. I loved Edward. But something about Jasper drew me in, beckoning me to get closer, to know more.

"Are you alright?"

I snap to attention and turn to look at Edward. Beautiful, perfect Edward. "Oh yeah," I say, turning back to him. "Sorry, just lost in thought there for a moment. The English assignment I turned in wasn't my best work."

Alice laughed. "You're getting a B on this test."

I rolled my eyes, staring down at my lunch. It wasn't her fault that she annoyed me. She's my very best friend, but she's with the person my mind and body are obsessed with. She gets to talk to him, to see him anytime she wants. Edward keeps us pretty separated, saying it's because of Jasper's control, but I've never seen a single time he wasn't able to control himself. We stayed in the car together, in a hotel together, and we didn't have a single issue.

"Thanks, Alice," I mumbled, glancing at her husband beside her. He was staring at me, a confused look on his face as he often did. I often wondered exactly what he was feeling toward me that confused him so much. Was it jealousy, there's been plenty of that. Anger, some of that. Why...why did I have to have a crush on my boyfriend's brother and best friend's husband? Longing? Check. Desire? Check.

Does he know who and what these emotions are toward? Can he tell that the longing I feel is for him? If he could, would he ever let on that he knows how I feel, and hopefully he never will. I've accepted that the way I feel is just that - feelings. And I'm sure one day in the near future they will fade.