Jacob put my truck in park outside my house. I sighed, not wanting to leave the heat of his body. I felt like my body was defrosting from the inside out after my near-drowning experience.

He turned the car off and asked, "Are you going to be okay?"

I nodded against his shoulder and, despite my body's protest, sat up and scooted back to my seat. "Yeah. I'm fine now. I'm sorry about...all that. Is everyone else going to be okay? Harry...I."

I glanced around, unwilling to meet his eye. He was talking, I knew that, but I couldn't hear a word he said as I stared at the car parked on the street. My mind didn't process anything else; I reached for the door and got out of the car. I vaguely heard Jacob growl, but paid no mind to it until he was standing in front of me, blocking my path.

I glanced at him. "Move."

He shook his head. "There's a vampire here, Bella."

"Yes, I know. It's the Cullens'."

He stared at me, frowning. "You don't know that!"

I shook my head. "Their car is here." I gestured behind me.

"Bella!"

I looked beyond Jacob, shocked by the vampire standing on my porch. It took my mind a few seconds to connect her to the person in my head; had she always been this beautiful and perfect? But then my body was moving without permission. I shook off the hand on my shoulder, trying to restrain me, and ran at Alice as fast as I could. Ignoring the pain from slamming into her stone body, I sobbed.

"I never thought I'd see you again!" I cried.

"You're alive! What happened?" She sounded shocked.

I pulled back, staring at her in confusion. "What?"

"I saw you jump off a cliff, but you never surfaced from the water; you disappeared."

Jacob reminded me that he was here when he snorted . "I pulled her out of the water."

She sniffed the air and flinched. "You're hanging out with wolves? Bella!"

I shrugged, avoiding her gaze. "They're good people."

"Dangerous too," she scoffed.

Jacob growled again, walking closer to me. I could see his hand twitching, probably stopping himself from grabbing me. "I'm dangerous?" he asked, his voice rising in anger. "You're a bloodsucking leech, but you call me dangerous? Last I checked, I was designed to protect people from you and your kind."

"Don't fight..." I begged, mostly talking to Jake. Alice wasn't wrong; wolves did pose a danger. A fact Sam and Emily were all too aware of. "Is...are you the only one here?"

"Jasper is at the house. Edward doesn't know I'm here; I wanted to make sure before I talked to him. He's been off on his own for a while, so I didn't think he'd take the news well."

Jacob shoved himself in between us, cutting off what Alice was saying. "Can I talk to you?"

I glanced at Alice and she smiled at me. "I'll go let the family know you are okay."

I grabbed her arm as she passed me. "No. Don't go. Jake and I can talk later."

He took a step back, his face revealing his betrayal. "Got it," he grumbled, walking past me. I didn't mean to hurt him, but I had to talk to Alice. I couldn't let her leave yet.

She followed me into the house and took a seat on the couch beside me. She grabbed my hand. "Are you okay? You don't look great; no offense."

I laughed. "It's been rough."

I told her all about my life since they left. Told her how it felt like they took my heart. How much pain it caused me. I avoided telling her about the voices, not wanting to risk her thinking I was crazy. She listened thoughtfully, keeping my hand trapped in her cold.

When she went into a vision, I thought nothing of it, until the horrified look on her face registered. She stood pacing almost too quickly for me to see her. I was about to ask what happened when she knelt in front of me.

"Bella...Rosalie told Edward you're dead. She said he thinks you died and he...he wants to die too."

Everything was blurry after that. I packed a small bag, dug out my passport, and Alice drove at dangerous speeds to the airport.

I whispered to Alice once we were seated on the plane. "I don't understand." I said. "Why would he do this? He left, he said he didn't love me. Why would he kill himself?"

Alice hesitated for a moment. "He lied. He just wanted you to be safe."

I rolled my eyes, irritated by his overprotective nature. "I was perfectly safe. If anything, my birthday and that stupid paper cut proved how safe I am around you all."

"You feel that way because you don't understand things the way we do."

I huffed. "Then explain it to me! Stop keeping me in the dark and expecting me to understand things you all won't even explain!"

"A human at a slaughterhouse, for example, may feel bad about the cow being slaughtered, but in the end, they feel their body needs what the cow offers, so they'll still eat their burger come dinner time. A vegetarian human, on the other hand, will look at that cow, only seeing its value, its life, and feel horrified at the thought of it dying just to feed people, knowing they can get what the cow offers from another source."

"Alice, I know the difference between omnivores and vegetarians," I said, rolling my eyes.

"Yes, but what worries Edward is that some of us think like the human that still eats the cow."

"Jasper?" I asked.

She nodded. "The only reason he switched diets is because of his gift. It made it harder for him to feed on humans, feeling their fear, their pain, and their longing for their loved ones as they faded away. If he could turn that off, he wouldn't be with us."

"But his control is fine; you just said so."

"His control is fine, but his way of thinking tends to lead him to fall off the wagon more often. He slips up more than anyone else; well, actually, he's the only one who does. That's why Edward freaked out, he figures it's only a matter of time before Jasper loses control again."

I whispered, "Jasper wouldn't hurt me." I wasn't sure why I said that. He very well could hurt me; we weren't very close, despite my lingering crush, and I barely knew him.

Alice patted my hand and gave me a weird look. "Oh I know that. Now give me some time to search for Edward, please."

I nodded, relaxing back into my seat. I supposed it should offend me that Jasper saw me no more than a cow, but it was understandable, and I imagined it's how most vampires think. It made me sad, realizing we'd probably never be close since he only thought of me as a cow at a slaughterhouse. You're worth it. He said that. If he thinks I'm worth it, does he really only see me as a food source?