She couldn't remember what caused the argument — unusual for Leia, whose recollection of events was "annoyingly accurate" according to Luke — but they were both mad and things had escalated in the worst way. Leia tried to maintain her sanity by remaining neutral or even polite, something Han seemed to take personal offense to. He rose to the challenge of trying to get a reaction out of her, goading her not just at meals and after hours, but in the middle of meetings.
That had crossed a line.
They'd always been able to work together even when actively fighting. They put aside whatever was going on personally when a job needed to be done. They didn't snipe at each other over command center comms or refuse to work with one another; they just did their jobs and went their separate ways until one of them made an apology — even if the apology didn't always look like traditionally defined apologies.
But here, now, Han was challenging her in a strategy meeting and Leia was entirely over it.
"This feels like a trap," Han said once Leia finished outlining the mission details. He had, at least, not interrupted her the way some of the generals were prone to do. Small mercies.
Leia didn't bother doing what she'd done the last three meetings that had gone this way, which was look Carlist dead in the eye and ask why Han was even there. She'd heard all the reasons, and they were difficult to argue with: he had good instincts, he knew military strategy, he could spot an ambush a light year away. Leia knew all of that to be true — she'd personally been on dozens of missions with the man — but she still didn't love him attending her meetings and upending her plans.
Leia regarded Han with something adjacent to politeness. "How so, Captain?"
"Well, Your Highness, you're tellin' me this contact appears out of nowhere, has a connection that leads directly to speeder parts that we haven't been able to find anywhere, they'll only meet with you personally, and they insist it has to be done at the Imperial capital?"
Leia sighed. She knew it sounded foolish. But there was more to it than that. And he had details wrong. "I'm not going to Coruscant; I'm going to Centax-3."
"Which is a moon of…"
Leia didn't dignify the snarky question with a response. Obviously it was a moon of Coruscant. It still wasn't the same as showing up on the planet itself. "And the contact didn't appear out of nowhere; he's an acquaintance of mine from Apprentice Legislature, he's from Coruscant and needs to stay close to home for personal reasons, and he doesn't just happen to have connections; he has a vested interest in hard-to-find speeder parts. He's been refurbishing antique speeders since we were teenagers." She raised her eyebrows slightly and looked Han in the eye. "You'd like him."
"That so?"
She shrugged. "He winked at me during my coronation."
Han smirked and leaned back in his chair. "Sounds like you'd like 'im."
Leia pressed her lips together. Arguing about this in public was borderline embarrassing. Anyway, what she'd said was a complete fabrication; Han would hate Chassellon Stevis. "Are there any legitimate concerns?" she asked glancing around the room.
General Rieekan cleared his throat. "Your Highness, I think several of Captain Solo's points should be taken into consideration before moving forward with this mission."
Leia nodded and tried to ignore the smug expression she knew was on Han's face. She could take criticism — real criticism, not just nosy pilots who were taking out their irritation with her on her missions. She'd have to pretend Han's criticism fell into the category of real criticism until she could speak with Carlist privately.
The meeting broke with no resolution and Leia headed straight to the tauntaun pens without a glance at anyone else. She'd told Luke she would cover his patrol shift. Well, she'd begged Luke to find a reason that she'd need to cover his patrol shift. She needed to get outside and off-base and away from—
"Thought Luke was on patrol this morning, Princess."
It took every ounce of diplomatic training she had to not groan aloud at the sound of Han's voice. "I told him I'd take his shift," she said evenly, refusing to look away from Essi, the tauntaun she usually rode. "I thought Wedge was going out with me."
"Rieekan swapped us last-minute. Said he needed Antilles for somethin'."
Of course he did. She couldn't prove it had been done on purpose, but Carlist sometimes had funny ideas about how to handle members of the rank who weren't getting along. Han wasn't a member of the rank — neither was Leia, technically, for that matter — but a two-hour patrol shift with Han was right in line with the sort of thing the general might decide to arrange to try to force a…bond or understanding or something. Leia rolled her eyes and continued tacking up Essi.
They were out on patrol in minutes. Leia noticed that Han had pulled Murra again and, for a moment, allowed herself to think that it was cute that he seemed to have a genuine affection for the animal. Then he had to remind her of the meeting they'd just left.
"Wasn't tryin' to upset you earlier," Han said into his comm.
"I'm not upset," Leia said a little too quickly. She nudged Essi ahead of Han and Murra.
"Hate to argue with you, but I have known you nearly three years, sweetheart, an' I've upset you more'n I should have in that time. Think I know what it looks like by now."
Leia bit her lip. "I—Look, I just don't think we should take our personal disagreements into the war room."
"Who said anything about gettin' personal?" Han asked.
"You eviscerated my mission in that meeting, Han."
"I did not. I brought up concerns that I actually have. This whole thing feels a little too good to be true. I know we're desperate, but—"
"I think we should just agree to not talk about this any more. You're obviously upset with me and taking it out on me in meetings, and I don't have the time or energy to argue about it."
"Think you may be projecting, Princess. I ain't upset with you."
Leia urged Essi faster without responding. She focused on the landscape, the vast, snowy wasteland that the Alliance had decided to call home for the foreseeable future. It was intimidating in its starkness, terrifying in its deadliness. She hated that just being outdoors came with constant threats to life and limb, but that was the tradeoff for operating undetected by the Empire.
An object in the distance caught her attention. She'd originally thought it was a rock formation, but now it looked…strange, misshapen, and almost as if it were floating off the ground. Leia pointed Essi in its direction and took off, wanting to take a look at it up close.
"Where're you headed so fast?" Han asked. When she didn't answer, he said, "Leia, think that's a mirage. Not anything worth checking out."
The whiteout hit without warning, flakes falling so thickly than Leia could barely see Essi's horns. She pulled the tauntaun to a halt, peering over her shoulder to look for Han. She was greeted with a wall of impenetrable white, but her comm crackled to life and she heard his voice loud and clear.
"Where'd you go? Can't see a damn thing."
She activated her comm. "I stopped moving. Just waiting for the squall to pass."
Snow squalls rarely lasted thirty minutes and never more than an hour. If she just stayed still, she could wait it out and be on her way as soon as the snow let up.
Leia saw the faintest flash of light in the sky — lightning that occasionally accompanied the squalls. The thunder that followed was louder than expected, causing Leia to jump and Essi to startle. She attempted to regain her balance, but the tauntaun managed to unseat her before taking off, and Leia found herself sitting in the snow, nothing but swirling flakes clouding her vision. She sighed, took a moment to catch her breath, and stood, dusting snow off her legs.
"You all right?" Han's voice came across her comm. "Essi just about ran into us and I didn't see ya."
"I'm fine. She startled at the thunder and unseated me."
Han's voice was a sort of echo all of a sudden — he was apparently close enough for his actual voice to make it to Leia before the comm transmission. "Don't move. I think I can hear ya."
"You really shouldn't move at all during a whiteout, Han," Leia said flatly. It was dangerous, what he was doing. He could end up lost or worse.
"Yeah, keep yelling at me. Think I'm almost there."
"I'm not yelling." Leia heard the sharpness of her tone and took a deep breath, willing herself to sound calmer than she felt. "I just know that it's dangerous to keep—"
Murra appeared half a meter from her as if by magic, one moment hidden entirely by snow, the next nearly pressed up against Leia. "Need a ride?" Han asked.
Leia rolled her eyes but smiled reluctantly. "Looks like it."
"Need a boost?"
She shot him a look. They'd done this before and Leia had managed just fine by taking two running steps before jumping and pulling herself up onto Murra's back. "Have I ever needed a boost?"
"Depends on who you ask."
Another eye roll. "I'll be fine. Just hold still a second." She took a step backward and felt the sickening drop of air and nothing else beneath her boot. Han and Murra disappeared entirely into the wall of white. Thick clumps of wet snowflakes blinded her as she fell.
Something broke her fall, knocking the breath from her lungs before she slid along the slick surface beneath her and found herself airborne again. When she landed a second time, her entire body locked as she attempted to regain the ability to breathe.
She didn't see how Han landed, only heard the thud of his body hitting ice as she gasped for breath, frozen in place. Something hurt somewhere, but she had trouble pinpointing the pain.
"Leia?" Han said, kneeling next to her. His eyes were wide, his movements frantic. "Sweetheart, can you hear me?"
Leia took some shallow, shuddery breaths before nodding. "I-I'm okay…I think," she gasped softly.
Han ran his hands down her arms before gripping her hands in his. "Can you get up?"
Leia bristled, still breathing hard. She felt off somehow, out of it, and she couldn't move as fast as he was moving. Her head was killing her. "Give me…a minute."
Han nodded, still grasping her hands in his. "Okay. Take as long as you need, sweetheart."
She pulled her hands out of his and slowly pushed herself up onto her elbows. Sharp pain shot through her shoulder and Leia sucked breath through her teeth as she moved her weight to just one of her arms. Han watched her, concern evident on his face. Leia shoved herself into a sitting position and stared at the spot where she'd landed. A spot of red bloomed on the icy ledge where her head had been. Her shoulder throbbed. She cradled the affected arm close to her body and winced when an attempt to breathe deeply resulted in sharp pain radiating through her back.
She looked at Han. "Are you okay?" she asked, though he seemedfine.
"Think so," he said. "You bleedin'?"
"I think so, on the back of my head."
He moved to touch her, but stopped himself. "You want me to look?"
Leia nodded. The movement made her dizzy, so she stopped and said, "Please."
Han was behind her quicker than she'd previously thought he could move, pulling away the hood she'd apparently bled through. She felt his shaky breath on the back of her neck as he looked at her head. "Doesn't look too bad. It's a pretty shallow gash." He replaced her hood. With her back to him, he seemed bolder, more willing to admit to things he'd otherwise leave unsaid. "Kriff, Leia, I thought I'd lost you." She felt some weight against her good shoulder, as if he'd rested his head against her. He wrapped his arms around her. Leia yelped in pain as the embrace compressed her injury. Han released her immediately and moved until he was in front of her. He seemed to take notice of the way she held her arm, pressing it close to her body with her other arm. "You break your collarbone?"
She shook her head, feeling dizzy and sick again. Stop doing that, Leia. "Shoulder's out of joint, I think. Could be worse."
"Need to get you a sling."
Leia blinked slowly. "My med kit's with Essi." She hoped the tauntaun knew well enough to run back to base. She might freeze if night came before they were able to get out. We'll definitely freeze.
"We can improvise." Han made a move as if he were going to unfasten his coat.
Leia understood that he meant to use a layer of clothing as a makeshift sling and stopped him. "Don't touch your coat," she said. "You need to keep as much heat trapped as you can as long as possible. I'll survive." Leia felt in her coat pockets for her comm. It was gone. Must've slipped out when I fell. She looked around on the ledge for any sign of it before peering further into the crevasse. She couldn't make out the bottom and wondered how deep it was. She glanced around again, this time picking up a large pebble and tossing it into the massive crack in the ice.
"What—"
Leia held up a finger, silencing Han and listened. It took several seconds longer than she expected to hear the pebble bounce against the bottom. If her comm was down there, it was probably broken.
She looked up at Han, for the first time really seeing the predicament they were in. They had fallen into a crevasse. Sheer walls of ice stretched some six or seven meters on all sides. The shelf of ice she'd hit before sliding and falling further was close to four meters above them. Snow fell into the crevasse at an alarming rate. "Do you have your comlink?" she asked. "Can we get in touch with the base? I think mine fell out of my pocket."
A sheepish expression crossed Han's face, as if he realized he should've thought of that on his own. He patted his pockets, withdrawing his comm from one of them. "Echo Seven to Echo Base, do you copy?"
Leia moved to stand, but dizziness quickly overtook her again and she sat down with her back against the wall of ice, holding her head in her good hand. Han made attempt after attempt to contact the base as he looked over the ice that lined the edge, most likely trying to determine if he could climb to the surface for help. After a few minutes on his comm and several passes over the ice wall, he sat next to Leia.
"Either they ain't hearing me or I ain't hearing them," he said. "I'll try again in a few. You all right?"
Leia shrugged her good shoulder. She'd lifted her head a few times to watch him, but had been holding her head again for the past several minutes. "Dizzy."
She shouldn't have told him. She would be fine, she was sure, and he had a tendency to worry about her unnecessarily. She'd had worse blows to the head, had worse—Well, maybe not worse falls. This one had been pretty bad, but all things considered, she was okay. She hadn't died yet, anyway.
Han touched her cheek with his gloved hand and Leia lifted her head slightly. He made a sort of vague motion with his head that Leia knew was about to be followed by a C'mere. She didn't wait for the verbal invitation to rest her throbbing head on his shoulder. She dropped her hand into his open palm and closed her eyes. She knew how this would go: they'd lean on each other for comfort until they were rescued, probably share some well-kept secret while they were feeling vulnerable, and as soon as the shock and fear wore off in a few days, they'd be back at each other's throats. The very idea of what was to come exhausted Leia, but she wanted the respite to last as long as possible.
Maybe it'll last this time, she dared to hope. When she and Han weren't fighting, she did like him. They worked well together and clearly cared for each other. Leia thought she might care a little too much at times, but that was not a topic she was willing to unpack while stuck with the man in a crevasse.
She squeezed his hand lightly. "How did you—Did you jump after me?" That seemed too risky, even for Han.
He shook his head. "Not exactly. You disappeared. I thought it was just the snow coverin' you at first, but when you didn't come back after a few seconds, I went to look. Fell and landed on that thing." He pointed at the ice shelf above them. "Then saw you laid out down here and dropped after you." She could feel his eyes on her. "Scared me bad, Leia, you just lyin' there like that."
"You shouldn't have…" She trailed off. There was no use in saying what he should or shouldn't have done. They were stuck there either way.
All of a sudden, Han moved and touched her arm. "Leia?" Panic laced his voice.
She lifted her head from his shoulder and looked at him. "What?"
He sighed in relief. "You stopped talkin' and I thought you were out."
She rested her head against him again. "Oh. Nope. I'm…I'm okay."
Han called for base every few minutes for what had to be at least an hour. Leia watched the snow that fell into the crevasse from above with growing interest and fear. The rate at which it fell hadn't let up. She grabbed Han's wrist and looked at his chrono. 1207. They'd left base at 1000 and patrolled for maybe half an hour before the snow squall moved in and Leia had gone tumbling. The storms were only supposed to last an hour at most.
Then again, this planet may be literal Hell, she thought. Why not have day-long whiteout conditions?
"Snow should've let up by now," Leia said nervously after Han finished his latest attempt at contacting the base. "Squalls aren't supposed to last this long."
Han looked around at the snow collecting meters from them. They'd settled under the ice shelf, which kept the snow from falling directly on them. He shrugged his shoulder slightly and dropped Leia's hand, a signal that he was about to get up. She lifted her head from his shoulder and rested it against the ice behind her. Without a word, he walked the length of the ledge they'd landed on, examining the sheer wall of ice. When he returned, he took Leia's hand again but didn't say anything.
"All ice?" she ventured. She knew he had been hoping he'd missed a rock formation somehow during his earlier investigation.
"All ice," he confirmed.
"They'll send a search party," she said confidently. "We were supposed to be in already. They'll notice we haven't returned and send someone. We'll be okay."
The snow fell more furiously, the distant and muffled sound of thunder startling them both from time to time. Leia closed her eyes, but felt like she was being watched after a few minutes and popped them back open. Han peered at her.
"Yes?" Leia asked.
He shook his head. "Don't fall asleep on me."
"I'm not. I have a headache. Needed to rest my eyes."
"Resting eyes is only a step away from sleepin' and I need you awake."
"Scared of the thunder without me?" Leia teased.
Han rolled his eyes. "Terrified without you," he muttered. He almost sounded genuine. "You know, I was in a snow squall once before you dragged me to this cursed planet. Learned a few things."
"Oh, yeah? Like what?"
Han ticked each point off on a finger. "Don't move a centim in a whiteout, don't fall off your tauntaun, don't follow princesses into crevasses."
"Either the person who taught you that was incredibly insightful about the future, or you have managed to get yourself into some highly specific situations on more than one occasion," Leia quipped. "I'm not even sure which is more believable. It is you after all."
He held up his hands in mock defense. "Now, don't get jealous on me. It was a hypothetical. I've never had the pleasure of following another princess into a crevasse."
Leia pressed her elbow into his ribs briefly, rolling her eyes.
"Okay, okay," Han said, holding his hands up in mock surrender. "I actually only remember learnin' this one thing." He slid his arm gently around her shoulders. "If you can see a star, any star, you're almost safe."
Leia considered this. It made sense — stars meant clear skies, which meant the storm had moved on. Of course, stars also meant nightfall, which brought its own set of dangers on Hoth. "A star?"
He shook his head, eyes focused on the ledge in front of him, a smile playing on his lips. "Just somethin' my ma told me." He scoffed good-naturedly. "Pretty sure it was just to keep me busy hunting for something so I wouldn't get scared. It was a freak storm, not somethin' we were used to."
She smiled, imagining a tiny Han peering up at the night sky, looking for his safety star. "That's really sweet, actually." She rested her chin on his shoulder. "Are you scared now? Should we go on a star hunt?"
Han rolled his eyes and shook his head again. "Think I'll manage." He picked up his comm and tried to raise Echo Base again.
It had been hours. Leia's head still throbbed and pain shot through her shoulder with every movement, but she wasn't worried. Not yet. She and Han had managed to go the entire time in the crevasse so far without arguing, which seemed like an accomplishment in and of itself. They had even been talking the entire time at Han's insistence, and Leia began to remember all the things she had liked about the smuggler before…whatever argument had caused the rift between them. He was funny; he wasn't always tactful but he generally meant well; and he looked at her like he saw her. We're usually friends, she thought. I wish things would stay like this.
"You know, considering all we've been through, if we die now, it'll just be embarrassing," Leia said. "'Here lies Han Solo, survivor of execution attempts, hunted by a Hutt, killed by snow.'"
He jumped right in with his own offering. "'Leia Organa: survived Death Star interrogation, genocide, and multiple battles. Couldn't handle a little weather.'"
Leia laughed and closed her eyes, pressing her cheek to his chest. "You'll speak at my funeral, won't you?"
"We're not dyin', so there's no need to plan that now," Han answered, his tone serious.
"Right," she agreed, "but whenever I do. Die, I mean. You'll speak. You're the only one that'll tell the truth."
He cleared his throat. "Think everyone'll have good things to say 'bout you, Leia."
"Yes, I know. Good and flowery things. You'll tell the truth. So everyone'll know the nice things are real." She laughed. "My eulogy should start with, 'Leia Organa was a pain in the ass.'"
Han laughed his deep, genuine laugh, the one Leia liked inspiring most of all. "Shouldn't I be the one writin' your eulogy if I'm sayin' it?"
"I'm offering inspiration to get you started. In case you don't know what to say."
"I know what I'd say."
"Given my funeral a lot of thought, have you?" Leia teased, though the idea made her heart hurt a little.
"No," Han said quietly. "Just have a lotta stuff I wish I'd said earlier."
"Oh."
Han stroked her hair silently for such a long moment, Leia suspected he was going to leave it at that, maybe start up a different conversation altogether. When he cleared his throat, she startled slightly. "Leia Organa is a pain in the ass," he began. Leia chuckled. "But only because she cares so damn much. Never met someone who cared about everything they found worthwhile as much as she does. Never met someone who cared about the people around her as much as she does, either. Never had someone care as much about me as she does even though she pretends not to. Makes me think that, if we ever got on the same page, maybe one day, we could…" He trailed off, shook his head, a wry and crooked smile breaking across his face. Leia was left with her heart pounding, longing to hear the rest of her own mock eulogy.
She lifted her head slightly, brows pressed together. He looked back at her with eyes filled with longing for the briefest moment before glancing away. "Han," she whispered, though she wasn't sure what else to say in response. She wanted this, this closeness and sincerity and friendly banter all the time. She wanted to stop fighting about the most absurd topics. She wanted to express what she thought of him with the same ease that he had talking about her. She wanted him to finish his damn sentence. '…maybe one day, we could…' Maybe what, Han? Maybe we could what?
She stared at him too long without speaking, and Han cleared his through nervously. "How's your head?" he asked, his cadence a little too quick, voice a little too loud.
Leia took a second to get her bearings after the quick tone transition and nodded once. "Okay, I think. Still aches." She leaned into his side again, her head on his shoulder. "I imagine I'll have a grand time combing dried blood out of my hair." There was no way the sonic showers would get all of it out.
"You can use the Falcon's shower, Leia. Water should work better'n the sonics."
She hesitated. "Didn't know if I still had Falcon privileges," she said, her voice flat.
"What are you talking about?"
"You're mad at me. Didn't know if I could still just show up."
"I'm mad at you? That's news to me."
Leia sat forward and looked at him. "I thought you were."
"For what?"
She grimaced and glanced away, feeling silly and childish. "Ah, I was sort of hoping you'd mention something at some point to jog my memory."
"Here I was thinkin' you were mad at me."
Leia frowned. "I'm only mad because I thought you were being retaliatory in the meeting this morning."
He shook his head. "No, shockingly, I genuinely think that sending you into the Emperor's backyard is a terrible idea."
Leia furrowed her brow in thought. "Weren't you upset about the milk incident?"
Han shrugged. "For a day, maybe. You apologized weeks ago."
"I did?"
"You shared your whiskey."
"Oh, right."
"Thought you might've still been upset about the deal with the tauntaun pen."
Leia shook her head. "You said I was right and brought me that pastry, so I figured we were okay." She squinted at him, laughing softly. "Might make it easier to keep track of who's mad about what if we ever actually apologized to each other."
Han chuckled. "Wouldn't be us, though."
She snorted and settled closer to him, head again falling to his shoulder. A chill traveled down her body. "That's true." Leia laughed softly. "You really weren't being spiteful earlier?"
"No, sweetheart. I really do think your idea is terrible."
She laughed again, pain shooting through her shoulder with the abrupt movement. "Would love to hear some alternatives if you have them."
"One of us'll think of somethin'. And maybe your guy isn't waiting to turn on you. I've been wrong a time or two."
Leia gasped dramatically and lifted her head to look him in the eye. "You have? When?"
Han rolled his eyes and nudged her playfully. "Not any of the times you're thinkin' of."
She had begun to shiver uncontrollably, the only warmth in her body radiating from the pain in her shoulder. Han's attempts to get anyone on the comm sounded more frantic all of a sudden, and the snow kept falling. How is it still snowing? It had been hours and hours.
He had cleared small piles of it away to prevent it from walling them in beneath the icy protuberance jutting out from the wall of the crevasse. Leia briefly wondered if using the snow to insulate the area around them might not be a better idea, but every time she thought of being surrounded by packed snow, she had to push a vision of an icy, shared tomb from her mind. It would be hard enough for the search parties to find them as it was; they didn't need to camouflage themselves behind a snowy barrier.
Leia found the shivering more annoying than concerning. Her teeth kept clicking together, making talking difficult. Han found a stale ration bar in one of his coat pockets and made her eat it. Something about digestion having a thermic effect on the body. Leia didn't notice a difference and the shivering didn't stop.
There was something he wasn't telling her. She couldn't put her finger on how she knew, but she could tell by the way he kept touching her cheeks, the way he kept checking to make sure she was awake, the way he brushed his thumb over her lips, almost as if he didn't realize he was doing it.
"You're not gettin' any warmer," he murmured, more to himself than to her.
Leia's teeth chattered so violently that she couldn't speak without risking biting her tongue. She just shook her head.
"Okay, sweetheart, I'm makin' an executive decision. 'member Scipio?"
Leia furrowed her brow, thinking, remembering. Scipio was another planet in the midst of an ice age, though the temperatures didn't get as low as Hoth's. They had been there for…She couldn't remember, but the lining of her coat had gotten wet somehow, and they had to wait an hour for Chewie at the rendezvous point. Han had made Leia take off the damp, deadly coat and share his. She nodded, trying to conjure up a memory of the warmth she had felt bundled up with him. She was beginning to think she'd never be that warm ever again.
He helped her remove her coat, both of them doing what they could to avoid aggravating her shoulder. Quickly, quickly, she threw her good arm around his torso, letting the other arm hang uselessly and burying her face in his neck. Han wrapped the slack fabric of his coat around her and fastened it all the way up before taking her coat and draping it over her back. Leia winced when he moved in a way that jostled her shoulder, but the pain hardly bothered her. She was just glad to have Han so near, to have some hope that they wouldn't freeze to death as they waited for rescue.
"See any stars yet?" she murmured.
Han draped his arm over her waist, far below her injured shoulder, and gave her a light squeeze. When he spoke, his voice was comforting in both its familiar timbre and its nearness. "'m sure one'll be out soon."
Nightfall approached rapidly and the snow kept falling. There was no word from Echo Base, though Han hadn't given up trying to contact them every so often. Leia couldn't check the time, but she had been tracking the way shadows in the crevasse shifted across the sheer, icy walls, and she was sure it was close to sunset. She was warmer wrapped in Han's coat with him, and she imagined he likely was too, but no amount of huddling together would combat the deadly temperatures they were likely to see in the next few hours.
"Han?" Leia whispered.
He hesitated ever-so-slightly. "Yeah?"
"Are we going to die?"
The long stretch of silence after her question unnerved her. She'd been hoping for a bit of normalcy, some bravado, a speech about how he would get them out no matter what or how she'd been in far more dire situations and survived, so they had to survive now or it'd be embarrassing. Instead, he pulled her closer. "Dunno," he said softly, pressing his lips to her hair.
Leia nodded slowly. That felt like more of a yes than if he'd said the actual word. She lifted her head and looked him in the eye briefly before tilting her chin up and pressing her lips to his cheek. She pulled herself close to Han and buried her face in the hollow between his neck and shoulder. Tears stung her eyes as he stroked her hair.
"I'm glad you're here with me," she said softly. Her eyes and body and everything felt very heavy all of a sudden. "I'm sorry if that makes me selfish."
"Wouldn't want to be anywhere other than next to you," he murmured.
"I'm really sleepy." Something in the back of her mind told her she should find this alarming, but she was too tired to care.
"You gotta stay awake, sweetheart." Han kissed her hair again. "Tell me about your birthday growing up. What'd you do to celebrate?"
The question seemed so much less important than sleep, but Leia didn't want to disappoint him, especially since she was the reason he was most likely going to die. "We didn't celebrate my birthday exactly," she said, looking at him up close. "We had my Naming Day, which was three or maybe four days after my birthday. My parents didn't know my exact birthday. They treated it like a holiday. They both took the day off work and Dad would make sure he was on Alderaan the night before because the morning of, they'd wake me up by squishing into my bed with me and telling me the story of how they adopted me. Even when I got older and had my apartment on Coruscant, I'd make sure I was home the night before just like my dad did. I acted like I was too old for it, but if they'd stopped, I think I would've been devastated."
She paused, trying to remember more details. Han jostled her roughly. Pain shot through her shoulder. "Leia? Sweetheart, I need you to talk some more."
"Yeah, yeah," she said faintly. "We'd eat breakfast together — not in bed, just at the table like usual. And there were always presents. Nothing overly extravagant usually, except the year I got my thranta. She was beautiful."
"What was her name?"
Leia smiled slightly, hesitant to reveal the secret she had kept for weeks. "Essi," she whispered.
"You named a tauntaun after your thranta?"
"She was a good thranta."
"Yeah?"
She nodded. "She was beautiful and really sweet and listened really well. I'm a fair rider, but Essi made me look better than I am. I wish I'd been able to take her with me when I entered the Senate, but Coruscant really isn't any place for thrantas." She sighed softly. "Have you ever seen one?"
"Believe it or not, I have. They have a herd of 'em on a planet I visited once out here in the Outer Rim."
Leia furrowed her brow. "Thrantas?" she asked, wondering if Han was mistaken. The species was native to Alderaan, and as far as she knew, only native to Alderaan.
"Yeah, Chewie an' me stopped there a few years back. Remember someone pointin' them out. Said they were imported from the Core. Didn't ask which planet, but—"
"They're only native to Alderaan," Leia offered. She squeezed Han close with her good arm, tilting her head and chin to see him better. "I'd like to see them someday."
"I'll take ya once we get outta here," Han offered. "But you gotta promise to stay awake."
"You drive a hard bargain," she said softly. Her eyelids felt heavy, heavy, heavy. She fought to keep them open. "I can maybe. Maybe."
"Leia," Han began, "sweetheart, I need you to know—"
Leia looked up at him when he began to speak, but her attention was drawn to the sliver of sky she could see beyond the ice shelf that acted as their shelter. The snow had stopped as abruptly as it had begun, and Leia spotted a speck of twinkling light.
"A star," she murmured softly, allowing her head to rest against him again. They were almost safe. She could close her eyes for a bit.
She had vague memories of the bacta: the warmth of the gel, the sensation of weightlessness, the claustrophobia the tank always seemed to cause her. When she fully woke, though, she was in a bed in the medical wing, IV in the back of her hand and finally warm. Leia blinked, the thick haze of whatever had kept her unconscious clearing slowly.
Memories slogged to the surface of her mind one after the other. Falling during the snow squall, Han coming after her, her head aching, her shoulder in excruciating pain, Han wrapping her in his coat, something about a star, Han kissing her hair, Han…Han…
Panic seized her as she tried to recall what had happened to Han. He had been with her. He…he had been fairing better than she had. If she was okay, he was surely okay. Leia looked around the room, rubbing the scratchy blanket that covered most of her body between her thumb and finger. He's okay, she thought. If I'm okay, he's okay.
She just wanted to see him, to know for sure that he was okay.
As if by magic, the man himself slipped in the door of her room, clearly trying to avoid announcing his presence to the med wing. Leia watched him curiously, a small smile playing on her lips, as he gingerly shut the door, pressing his back to it with eyes closed. He's not supposed to be here, Leia thought, though she couldn't imagine why.
"Why are you skulking around here like a common criminal in a heist?" she asked.
Han jumped and looked around the room, his focus quickly falling on her. A grin erupted across his face. "Ya don't use common criminals in a heist, sweetheart. That sounds like a disaster waiting to happen."
Leia scoffed softly but smiled at him as he approached her. He reached out to stroke her cheek, rough fingers on smooth skin comforting in their familiarity. She covered his hand with hers. "We made it out," she whispered.
The smile hadn't left Han's face. He nodded. "Sure did. Search party got to us just in time."
"You're okay?" she asked. He seemed okay, seemed better than okay, but she needed to hear him say it.
"Doin' just fine. Little bit of frostnip on my nose and toes when they first brought us in, but they're all better now." He took a deep breath. "Everything's better now."
Leia met his gaze, saw the affection in his eyes, and looked down abruptly, overwhelmed. "Thank you," she said quietly, "for helping me."
Han tilted her chin up so she'd look at him again. "Anytime," he said, his voice gentle and low. He shot her a teasing smirk. "Though, if you could start spacing out your needin' help to once every few months, it'd be a big improvement. I'm tired after this last little misadventure of ours."
Leia rolled her eyes and scowled playfully. "I'll consider the request." She smiled at him. "Really, though, why were you being so sneaky coming in?"
Han shrugged. "It's after visiting hours. But you've had Command in and out of this room all day, so I haven't been able to see ya since this mornin', and they said you were probably waking up all the way tonight. Had to come and check for myself." He tilted his head back toward the door. "I can go—"
"No, stay," Leia said hurriedly. "Please."
Han grinned again, pulled one of the chairs in the room close to her bed, and sat. Leia slid her hand in his and asked for details about their rescue. She was bone-tired and fairly certain she'd fall asleep again as he told the story, but she knew he'd be nearby if she needed him.
He always was.