"Hm, you're still here?"

Technoblade didn't sleep as much anymore, so the fact that Ghostboo managed to creep around his cabin without notice might mean something. Whether the meaning was that ghosts had a disturbing talent not to make any noise or that Techno wasn't as sharp as he used to be, who would say?

Techno would love to think that retirement hadn't made him soft, but there was evidence to the contrary. Then again, maybe it hadn't been the retirement that changed him. He'd only managed to keep that up for a couple of weeks at most before conflict came kicking down his door again. What he was doing since then wasn't retirement. It was settling down, turning a new leaf.

(He had changed. He had grown complacent and weak. Everything that had happened, happened because of Technoblade. Normally he could make peace with that.)

"Where else would I be?" Ranboo - not Ranboo, Ghostboo - asked. Techno needed to remind himself that there was a difference often. Ghostboo tilted their head so far a living person would have hurt their neck. But a ghost was not constricted by silly real world things such as having a spine. So Techno wasn't surprised when the enderman hovered almost completely bent double, watching him with a smile.

"You could go to your house," Techno said. He rubbed at his eyes and made his way across the room so he could grab something to eat. He was rarely hungry in the mornings, but growing soft was one thing. It wouldn't do for him to let his physical body deteriorate too. It was what kept him alive. He picked up a gapple and bit into it, pretending it didn't taste like ash. Like laugh-filled memories and regret.

"My house is empty," Ghostboo said. "Maybe because I'm not in it?"

"Definitely because you're not in it," Techno replied.

"I don't think I… enjoy? Being in it? If that makes sense?" Ghostboo spoke with a questioning cadence that reminded Techno of alive Ranboo when they had only recently moved. Walking around on eggshells, thinking that a tiny screw-up would somehow set off the relative peace of the commune.

But Ghostboo wasn't scared.

("There's nothing to be scared of when you're already dead. It's great!" were the exact words Ghostboo had said to him. They left a bitter taste in Technoblade's mouth as well.)

"It's your house," he said again, flatly.

Ghostboo hummed. "Do you mind me being here?"

"Of course not," Techno answered quickly. Probably too quickly.

But if the ghost noticed, he didn't let it show. His smile did not falter, scarred face bunching up his cheeks and forming wrinkles around his eyes, an obscene contortion of what it should be. Techno did not want to look at it but felt he had no choice. In the end, he hadn't looked Ranboo in the eye because he was too busy looking at Sam.

(With the heavy weight of the rocket launcher pulling down on his arm, Techno couldn't remember if he really saw Tubbo's wide and fear-struck face either. It was Schlatt's pleased Chesire grin that had burned itself into his retinas.)

"I like being here. It's never empty." Ghostboo floated over to Steve and gave the polar bear a few pets. Steve chuffed, angling his snout away. He didn't much enjoy the ghost's company either. "You don't go out much, do you, Techno?"

"Don't got anywhere to go, really."

Things had been quiet, lately. Techno didn't know nor care where Dream had gone after being let out of jail. Connor had built half a house and then abandoned it. Niki didn't come by as often anymore, sad or busy. Phil ran away from grief.

So that left Techno in his cabin, settled. Retired.

Not alone.

"Didn't you have something important to do?" Ghostboo prodded. Their curiosity had the innocence of a child, with all the same hurtful edges. Techno didn't think they were mocking him, but there was something there. He could almost mislead himself into thinking it was blame.

(Maybe that was wishful thinking on Techno's part. Things would be easier if somebody else was blaming him for Ranboo's death, so the task wouldn't be left completely to himself and the voices.)

"I don't feel like it today," Techno said. He'd already gone to Snowchester with the picture and something definitely needed to be done about the whole Michael situation. He was working on it.

In fact, he had been working on it so much his lack of self-care had become noticeable even to Phil and Techno suspected that if the other man hadn't been so caught up in his own rituals of mourning, he'd already been told off for thinking that throwing himself onto some new dangerous situation was any way to deal with loss. Phil was nothing if not predictable though. At least to Technoblade.

"What do you feel like?" Ghostboo asked kindly.

Techno looked around the cabin. In the wake of him planning the prison break, it had become a mess of half-finished projects and unsorted chests. He could busy himself if he really wanted to. "I'll think of something."

"Sounds like fun!" Ghostboo curled up on the couch. "Can I stay? I think my house is very not nice, actually."

Throwing the half-eaten gapple onto the table, Techno did his best to look at them. Ranboo was dripping blood all over his floor. "Sure, if it makes ya happy."

Ghostboo's smile was a little more bearable that time.

"I don't get why you're still here." Heat from the forge washed over Technoblade's face. He could sit pretty close to it without burning his skin, piglin advantage.

"My house is empty," Ranboo repeated for the umpteenth time, voice quieter.

"I know," Techno said. "But you never used to spend too much time there anyway. There are other places you can hang out."

There was a small pang of guilt in Techno for his own selfishness, trying to trouble somebody else with the ghost's presence. He never felt this way about Ghostbur back in the day, but then again with Ghostbur Techno never felt like the responsibility was his to bear either. Wilbur had been self-destructing long before Techno had ever set foot inside that ravine.

Ghostboo frowned at him but didn't move.

Techno kept quiet. Telling Ghostboo to go to Snowchester would be cruel. No matter how patchy Techno's relationship with Tubbo had been, he had seen the state of the mansion when he went to inquire about the photograph. And he wouldn't tell Ghostboo to stay in their own house, alone.

Ghostboo didn't want to be alone. Techno painfully and desperately wanted to be.

He pulled the netherite away from the fire, dunking it into a metal bucket of water standing next to his forge. Smoke rose up into the room. Techno should really open up a window, the entire cabin was getting unpleasantly choked by it. He'd be screwing over his lungs for no good reason if he kept this up.

Yet standing up to open a window and make sure he could breathe felt like too much effort.

Why was he even going through all this trouble to make another set of armor? It wouldn't be leaving its stand in the Syndicate room anytime soon, if at all. Preparation for war flowed through Technoblade's veins more assuredly than blood did. He could take the plier he used for working the netherite and pull out his teeth more easily than he could stop being a paranoid mess. He could use the chisel for engraving enchantments and carve out some corner of his own consciousness to keep it from always watching his own back.

(All the armor in the world hadn't saved Ranboo. Not when Sam was able to find a vulnerable spot so easy to bury his will into. Not when words were enough to make Ranboo undo the leather straps and cast aside protection for a promise of safety. Armor couldn't protect Ranboo when it mattered.

Techno couldn't protect Ranboo when it mattered.)

"Do you want me to leave?" Ghostboo asked. Their tone stayed careful, cautious. A wavering hand with long fingers grasped for the edge of Techno's couch, trailing over a chest. He kept the picture in there and part of Techno wanted to ask if maybe Ghostboo wanted it back.

A much larger part of Techno wished he could burn the picture and Ranboo's house while he was at it - completely scorch the evidence of his failure from the earth.

Techno had always been fond of burning bridges.

He grunted a noise that was neither an answer nor a commitment. Telling the ghost what they should do wasn't his place.

Techno not wanting them around was also motivated by selfishness. Maybe it was good of him to be confronted by something he so desperately wanted to forget. Regret could stain him permanently and then softness would become the least of Techno's worries.

"Do you need me to leave?" Ghostboo asked instead, perceptive enough to figure out their previous question was one Techno couldn't say anything to.

"Nah," he said. The netherite was wiped with a cloth, still warm to the touch. Thrumming with echoes of life. Slightly damp - stained with wetness. Like Ranboo's corpse had been. "Nah, I don't need you to leave, Ranboo."

The silence that settled over them was as suffocating as the smoke of the forge. Techno exhaled, shaky and tired. Empty eyes of mismatched colors stared at him, through him. The faraway expression on their face was sending shivers through Techno.

"I don't need you to leave, Ghostboo," he corrected himself easily.

And just like that, that horrifically stretched smile was back, as Ghostboo folded their limbs back onto the couch, not reaching out for anything. They looked smaller like that. Slightly fading.

"Good! That's good! Because I don't want to leave. Thank you, Techno."

"Don't," Techno said sharply. No matter how many times he washed his hands, the blood on his skin wouldn't go away. Maybe it wasn't there anymore, but it was sticking to his soul. "There's nothing to thank me for."

(Technoblade would never be able to make this right.

No matter how hard he struggled, no matter how strong he got. He would never be able to protect what he truly cared about.

Funny, that people were so prone to attribute divinity to him and he couldn't save one single person.)

The netherite bent easily, over his wrist and curved the shape of his bicep. Techno's nails scratched across it unpleasantly. "I'm curious why you want to be in here so badly though?" he found himself asking, unsure if the answer was one that he'd like. But it struck him as odd that Ghostboo would have any lingering feelings about wanting to stick close to him considering what happened the last time he saw Ranboo.

He was wrong.

"I like it here," Ghostboo told him. "You make me feel safe."

Techno's fingers pressed into one of the razor edges of the netherite before putting it down.

"Why are you still here?"

Making armor shouldn't be so exhausting for Technoblade, but he found himself giving up on the set halfway through. The sun had gone down outside. The room was only illuminated by the fire dying in the forge, casting a warm glow that was quickly being snuffed out by darkness. Techno wondered if Phil took care of the animals. Somehow he couldn't bring himself to check.

His elbows rested on his knees so his hands could cup his face, relishing in the complete nothingness behind his clasped fingers. Fingertips pressing into his own temples offered some bare form of relief.

(Technoblade was so tired. He never felt this tired before.)

"You said I could stay," Not-Ranboo said. They were hovering before him, bending back and trying to peek at Techno's face curiously. It felt like fire on his skin. "Is something wrong? What is the matter, Techno?"

"You're dead."

"Right." Carefully, Not-Ranboo prodded at the gash in their chest, folding open the edges of their flesh with prying nails. "It's been nice, being dead. There's not a lot to worry about anymore."

"It's late," Techno said. "You should go home."

Not-Ranboo ignored him in favor of dragging across the wound. Their hands remained clean. They weren't corporal, so even their guts spilling out of their abdomen could not make a mess.

"Bruh…" Finally, Techno dropped his hands, shoulders slumping down further. "Why are you here?" A bit more heated now, impatience and frustration slipping into his tone. In the over a year they were friends, Techno didn't know if he'd ever raised his voice at Ranboo before. "What's in it for you? And don't give me that crap about liking it more here."

At first, Not-Ranboo was quiet and didn't say anything. Techno assumed they wouldn't answer. If he was in Ranboo's place, he wouldn't know what to say to that either. Techno didn't know much of anything anymore.

Then, the slightest noise of somebody clearing their throat. Detached from his own feelings, Techno almost wanted to chuckle. A ghost needing to clear their throat, fancy that.

"You shouldn't be alone," Not-Ranboo said.

"I like being alone-"

"No, Techno. I don't… I don't think it's good for you. To be alone right now." Not-Ranboo had floated away from him, lingering somewhere close to the forge. Close to the armor Techno had abandoned. He traced the edge, catching the light.

(Ranboo had told Technoblade about the voice in their head and it felt like divulging a secret. His own choir was a pale confession by comparison, they had never been held close to his heart. Techno had his guard up in so many ways, he always knew how to have an ace up his sleeve and hide things.

But Ranboo had come concerningly close to seeing some parts of him that only Phil had ever been allowed to witness.)

"You don't have to do that," Techno said. "You don't have to stick around just to- to protect me."

("Not after I failed to protect you.")

"I want to," Not-Ranboo said. And he sounded exactly like how Techno knew Real-Ranboo would sound.

And it hurt.

And so he sat back, sighed, and pulled a blanket from the back of the couch so he could lay it halfway over his own lap. "Fine. But I'm going to sleep, so you better don't make too much noise."

"You're funny," Ghostboo said. Techno shook his head.

(Maybe this was his punishment. Maybe the haunted memories of his previous loved ones knew exactly what they were doing in lingering.)

"Goodnight, Ghostboo." He watched as an arm was passed over the forge, stealing the last of the fire away. Techno swore he could feel those eyes staring at him still. He didn't mind them as much anymore suddenly.

"Goodnight, Techno. I'll be here when you wake up."

(Maybe tomorrow, Technoblade would go outside. Take care of the animals, check the farms, go to the nether for some mining. Visit a woodland mansion. He could ask Ranboo to come with him. That could be fun, it was a lot of fun last time.

Whatever empty promise he could fall asleep to.)