Chapter 2

2364

Her father was screaming. Her father was crying. Her father was begging for mercy. He begged for him. He begged for her. She did not want him to beg.

Her father was bleeding. Her father was burning. Her father was so torn that she barely recognized him anymore.

Her father was screaming but she was silent. Her father was crying but she refused to shed a tear. Her father was begging but she would never plead. Not for her life, not for his. She would never be that weak.

Her father was not screaming anymore. Her father was already dead. She was as stiff as him, her eyes glued to his bloody lifeless body.

One of the Cardassian soldiers neared her, he placed another candy in her hand. Her hand was colder than his.

"You did it very well", he said, and patted her away.

Ro Laren woke up in a jolt. For an instant, she was startled when noticing the soft mattress she was on. She was expecting the hard soil of her tent in the resettlement camps of her childhood. She realized a moment later she was in her quarters on the Wellington. It had only been a nightmare. She was now safe. She was not that weak defenseless child anymore, wandering the camps without a past, without a present, without a future to hope for. She was a Starfleet officer now and she had a mission to accomplish. She had a purpose.

However, the aftermath of the nightmare still lingered, the deeply ingrained feelings still plagued her: the fear, the rage, the helplessness, the shame.

And those feelings would never go away, no matter how far she ran, no matter how hard she fought to overcome them. They would always be the reminder of who she was once, of who she still was, deep inside.

2368

Miles O'Brian was just leaving Engineering when she came in.

"Ensign," he acknowledged her as they met at the door.

"Chief."

She knew O'Brian did not like her, and it wasn't only because he thought she was cold-blooded when making decisions. He was always respectful with her, always the perfect professional, and still, she sensed that she would never really have his respect, that he would never see her as a true officer. She guessed that for the dutiful chief, no present or future achievements could outweigh her past demerits. And she knew that was an opinion shared by many on the Enterprise and in Starfleet in general.

She found Lieutentant Commander La Forge checking the equipment they would carry to the crippled Romulan ship. She checked her phaser instead. The chief engineer had also given her a cold shoulder since day one. At first, he also only talked to her if duty required so. However, she had noticed how his animosity decreased in time, as they got to work together. Now, he was friendly, and a few days ago, off-duty, he even told her to call him Geordi. La Forge was willing to forgive her past mistakes if she proved valuable now. And she was going to be as valuable as she could. Maybe, with time and hard work, she could leave all her demons behind and feel again as if she belonged in the uniform.

They arrived at the transportation room with all the equipment, followed closely by Commander Riker and Lieutenant Worf, who had joined them at the corridor.

She went for the transporter pods along with La Forge as Captain Picard gave the final instructions over the comm line, "Transport to the Romulan ship as soon as we're within range."

Commander Riker promptly replied, "Aye, sir". And then surprised her addressing them and ordering, "No weapons. We don't want them to think they're under attack."

She obeyed, but blurted out the plain truth anyway. That was not a bright idea.

Of course, Commander Riker did not appreciate her comment. He dared her to repeat her words.

She knew she should not. Until that moment, Riker had been hard but fair with her. Many times, even if she did not intent to, they clashed. He had reprimanded her several times. But still, he seemed to trust her, even if probably it was just because Captain Picard did so. She was not going to push the limits with him, so she just subdued.

"Nothing, sir."

But as she went back to the transporter pod after leaving her phaser behind, she could not help but think that it really was not a bright idea. It was a terrible one.

She knew the Enterprise crew has experience with Romulans. She had read the records of their previous missions and realized that until her arrival, their encounters with them have gone surprisingly well. Captan Picard and Commander Riker had handled their limit situations with their Romulans counterparts with words, not weapons, and seemed to be gaining a certain level of cooperation.

She could understand why Commander Riker wanted to continue building that trust. She realized how important it could be for the Federation if Romulans stopped being a permanent threat to be something closer to a reluctant ally.

If peace, and even friendship, with the warlike Klingons have been achieved in the past, why couldn't it be achieved with Romulans? Captain Picard would certainly believe that to be possible. Ambassador Spock was convinced it was attainable. And, if such possibility could ever become reality, no one was better suited to achieve it than the two formidable men.

However, their last attempt to build bridges together, Ambassador Spock's dream of Unification, had ended up in treachery. Their last encounter with them had clearly showed her the Romulans' true intentions.

And she knew about Romulans too, she knew a lot about them. About missions with them involved whose records were not available to be read. They were like Cardassians. They could not be trusted. And their away team could pay a high price for their good intentions, beaming to their ship unarmed, just to aid them.