beastboy's perspective

"Butterflies are one of the most fascinating species that I have seen on Earth." Starfire noted.

Both of us were sitting on the floor of the common room, creating origami butterflies. Starfire's paper was pink, and mine was green. We folded, bent, and creased the paper in various directions to achieve our desired design. Cyborg and Robin were playing checkers at the table. Raven was meditating on the roof of the tower.

"I like butterflies, too. The patterns on their wings are absolutely gorgeous. My favorite butterflies, are blue morphos. Those are one of the largest butterflies in the world."

A glow of elation sprinkled in her eyes, "My favorites are the Pieridae butterflies. They are most common in having vibrant, colorful wings. I have not seen many things that fly in my world. Besides us Tamaraneans, and Rhee birds."

I chuckled tenderly, "Your planet is pretty cool, Star. I liked the magenta-pink sky and the way the buildings were built when we went there a while back."

"I like Tamaran's skies, too. Why is Earth's sky blue? Is it because of the oceans?"

"Not necessarily. Particles in the Earth's atmosphere spread sunlight in every direction. Because blue light travels in shorter and smaller waves than the other colors, that's why we always see a blue sky. Oceans are blue, not because it reflects the sky, but because of the water's absorption of red light."

Staffier was addled, "Oh..."

"It sounds confusing, I know. It's actually really interesting if you ask me."

"Life would be so different for people on Earth if the skies and waters were different colors. What if the sky was green, and the water was... purple?"

"That would be a confusing world to live in," we both laughed.

The left corner of my mouth lifted to a half smile, "Maybe not. If a green sky and purple water was all we knew, it wouldn't seem weird. I guess, if we woke up one day and everything just changed, that's when it would be strange."

"Yes. Beastboy..."

"Yeah, Star?"

She maneuvered the paper with her fingers, adding the finishing touch to her creation.

"When the spring comes, a caterpillar transforms into a butterfly. After a time period of uncomfortable pressure and growth, that caterpillar breaks into a new creature. The hard times you go through will eventually award you with strength, newness, and color—the things butterflies have after their transformation," she paused.

"And that's not all. Those once incapable, weak caterpillars now have wings, and the ability to soar." Starfire held the visual in her hand, then my eyes traced to her face.

Her eyes were kind, her smile was heart-warming, and her spirit was pure.

Just like the Starfire I knew.

"You, are coming out of your cocoon. Some days it may feel as if you haven't left it at all, but that is alright. Just be patient, and your colors and wings will come sooner than you know it."

I fixed the edge of my butterfly, returning a beam to my friend.

"Thanks a bunch, Star. I wouldn't have made it this far without you guys. You're right, there are times I feel like that cocoon will swallow me whole, but I'm getting somewhere."

Starfire laughed joyfully, "I am happy for you. Perhaps, we can make Glorrk together when you're ready. It's a Tamaranean dish with Zorkaberries and dried Spudlings, and it is exceedingly pleasurable to taste. I am sure you will find a liking to it."

I agreed, "Of course, Star. Can we do it for tonight's dessert?"

"Yes, we can."

"Alright. I'll see you in a bit." I saluted to my teammate, she waved back with a light laugh, then I made my way to my room.

Upon my entrance, the comfortable heat of the sun cascaded through my window. The curtains lifted softly in response to the fresh, cool, afternoon breeze. I placed the butterfly in a cardboard box where I maintained a collection of origami. My eyes scanned over a stack of comics, magazines and manga.

Raven recently made new addition to my collection, as she bought me the newest One Piece manga, and some Marvel comics. She even bought us both matching Demon Slayer shirts, and the truth was, she loved that anime a lot more than I did. My gaze locked on the wooden, vintage box that held the most delicate memories I had of my parents.

I sighed, feeling a slight hardening in my chest. I dusted off the surface, my hand quivering as I unlatched the box. I revealed the contents to myself once again. This was the first time I opened the memory box in almost a year, the only time I touched it was when I was cleaning my room.

A knock sounded on the door.

"Who is it?"

"It's me."

"Come in."

I loved that even though Raven and I were a couple, she continued to respect my privacy.

She commented in her monotone, "I just came from meditation, then I was looking for you. Starfire said you went to your room, so I came to check in. Bad timing?"

I exhaled deeply, "No, not at all."

Raven probably already sensed something was bothering me. She silently sat next to me on the floor, and glanced at the box. I hesitated to speak, feeling a lump grow in my throat.

"This is my parents' memory box. That's the syringe my father used to inject me with the serum, here are some notes of his research, maps, and my mother loved to collect coins and dollars just to keep as souvenirs—so I picked up on that, too," I pointed to a couple of bills and coins from my home land.

"It's not a lot materialistically, but what these items mean to me emotionally..."

My mouth loosened into a weak smile, while a hot tear lined down my cheek. Raven affectionately rubbed her hand across my back.

She uttered, "It means everything."

I admitted in a fragile tone, "It does."

"Even with pictures. In reality it's just a snapshot of a moment printed on paper, but what it means to a person is much more. If I could go back and live inside of the pictures I had with Mom and Dad, I would. I'd love to hear them laugh again, see them smile, feel them hold me. All of those memories I had are now only tangible through photographs,"

I shuddered, a trembling breath leaving my lips.

"But, I'm learning. I'm learning that Mom and Dad still live in my heart and guide me through each day. It may hurt at times, but I think I'm starting to understand my pain."

I faced Raven, my lips angled into the same frail smile, and tears wetting my cheeks.

"Rae, look. I'm feeling again," her amethyst eyes softened.

"You're... feeling again?"

"I feel like I got punched in my stomach a thousand times by grief, but I'm also feeling gratitude. I'm grateful for the pain, even if it hurts. Even on the dark days, I find joy, like knowing my parents gave me some good, unforgettable times,"

"The last time I touched this box, I wasn't able to feel anything. I was desensitized... I was numb. I didn't want to accept the fact that I was still going through losing my parents. I wanted to be done with it and move on with my life. That wasn't how it went down, though."

"And remember, some pains aren't meant to be moved on from, or "done with". You only have to learn to live with them, as heavy as they are."

"Exactly. Everything I refused to stare in the face, sat me down and taught me lessons," I sniffled, then Raven dabbed my cheek with a tissue.

"The pain reminded me that I have healing to do. That I had people here with me to help me get better. That... there is no timeline to recover, and that recovery is never linear, never easy. Healing's rough; it pierces you, it rips you up, it shatters you, it breaks you, to the point where you don't think you can become whole again. Pain reminded me that, I'm nothing without it. I'm not who I am without a struggle, without suffering, without a story. Pain showed me my strengths and weaknesses, and how to use them. Pain taught me to live again, how to heal again, how to love again..."

Raven slipped one arm behind my back, wrapped the other around my body, hugging me. I embraced her with one arm, tenderly kissing her hair.

"Pain made me remember that this is the life I live, and the only price I have to pay for loving someone, is to grieve."