Guardians of the White Lotus Chapter 19, an Avatar: Last Airbender + Guardians of the Galaxy Crossover fanfic

A/N: Hot dang! I did it! Welcome back :)

Disclaimer: I can't claim well...there's a lot I can't claim on this one...Marvel's Guardians of the Galaxy (for one and another), Avatar the Last Airbender, and then: Sesame Street, Muppets, David Bowie, Talking Heads, Led Zepplin, and...I'm sure I missed some.

But...this crazy trip of a story is ALL ME :)

There is a fifth dimension beyond that which is known to man or beast. It is a dimension as vast as space and timeless as infinity stones. It is the middle ground between light and shadow, science and superstition, animation, and live action. Present Tense becomes Past Tense or might become present again, who can keep track of this story? But we digress. You are about to enter another dimension, not just of sight and sound but of mind-a journey into a wondrous land of imagination beyond the double rainbow. Next stop, the Lotus Zone!

Nightmare at 20,000 Light years.

Our first tale features a crew from the Avatarian Starfleet. Their mission is to explore the recesses of space and provide knowledge of the location of known elements of creation. Aang, Nova Prime, has been trying to recover the Avatarian's lost property. Frustrated by the lack of information from the two prisoners, Katara and Sokka, Aang decides that he will have to employ other methods to get answers. Aang needs to realize that he's not traveling to his appointed destination, which, contrary to Aang's plan, happens to be in the darkest corner of the galaxy.

Star date 31D7142006

It has been a long day with little progress. The two Southern Aquaducian siblings have proven quite difficult. I tried to get the two siblings to talk, but one won't stop talking. Sokka spends a lot of time describing food. Lieutenant Sydney has found a fellow cookie lover. The female is more elusive. She glares a lot, mainly directed at her brother, but she has also turned her penetrating glare upon me. There is something unique about Katara. Her strength is beguiling. Being President of a Galactic Empire can be rather lonely.

Aang shut off his memory recorder and rubbed his brow. Why hadn't he gone into cooking school, as his Elemental Master insisted was a more straightforward path? "Fruit pies…" Aang mumbled, not realizing he had spoken out loud.

Sokka looked about with eager anticipation. "Fruit pies, I'll take a fruit pie. I prefer a meat pie, but any pie would be nice. I'll even take a pie to the face and lick it off, whatever is most convenient. Did I mention I want pie?"

"Several times," Aang stated dryly. "Do you want a pie, Katara?"

Suki walked on the bridge and saluted Aang, "Nova Prime, we set the course to Avataria." She faced her ex-boyfriend and sniffed. "Sokka."

"Suki!" Sokka exclaimed happily, oblivious to Suki's anger.

"I'm not talking to you." Suki folded her arms and turned away from Sokka.

Sokka pouted. "What, why?" He had thought she would give him a pie.

Katara rolled her eyes; honestly, her brother was so oblivious; whatever, his love life, his problem. Katara noticed a being dancing out the window and then vanished as it plugged its nose and dove below the sill.

"Sounds like she want cookie!" The blue furry monster panted as he thought of cookies.

"Lieutenant Sydney, we have discussed your penchant for demanding cookies."

Sokka and Cookie Monster yell, "Cookie!"

Katara shook her head, "I would get them a cookie, or this could get ugly."

"You're talking, now?" Aang considered this a victory.

Katara glared at Aang and Sokka and then sniffed, glancing away with a swift uptilt of her nose.

Aang admired her resistance. He stepped closer with his hands interlaced behind his back. "How about I get Sokka a cookie if you finally speak to me….properly," Aang interjected as Katara opened her mouth with a grin.

At Aang's amendment, she would have said, 'Speak.' But he took the fun out of her retort. She glanced away and noticed a horrific face in the small window; tremors of fear coursed through Katara.

Sokka sagged in utter defeat, whining. "Katara, come on, have mercy; I'm starving."

Katara looked away from the window and at her brother, who had only eaten two hectares ago. "You are hardly starving, Sokka." When she glanced back, mere seconds from the last viewing, the window was vacant. She blinked her eyes to clear her head. She had hit her head; maybe she was hallucinating. Her stomach growled.

"A-ha!" Aang and Sokka declared in justified unison as Katara's stomach growled in agreement.

Sokka hopped himself and his chair over to Aang, hands tied behind his back. He leaned forward without toppling forward. "Can you get that cookie right now? What Katara said counts. You see…"

Cookie Monster threw out his blue furry arms, "C is for cookie, and it is good enough for me."

Aang interjected Cookie Monster's singing. "Lieutenant Sydney, bring a plate of cookies to Sokka." Aang jabbed his finger at the salivating blue monster. "Do not think about eating it yourself!"

"No, me want cookie!" Sydney stomped his face, and his pupils jiggled in his white eyeballs.

The antics of Cookie Monster were familiar to Aang, which usually resulted in some of the electronics getting destroyed. "You may share. Remember how we talked about sharing?"

"Yes, sharing was the latest letter memo of the day."

Electric sparks shot out of the control board, and a purple count with slicked-backed hair rotated around. "One, ha-ha, memo of the day."

Aang cautioned. "What did the follow-up memo say?"

More electric sparks, as Count shouts. "Two memos of the day!"

"Count, we've got it!" Aang glared at the cape-wearing navigation control captain.

"One reprimand," More sparks sputtered as the Count glumly countered.

"Count, do you want to receive a demerit?"

"Two demerits," Count said glumly, and the sparks barely fizzled.

Katara wondered how the Avatarian Society had controlled so much of the galaxy if this motley crew of miscreants demonstrated their aptitude for conquering. They seemed like idiots. Katara considered the state of the general universe and her place in it. How did she get here? There was another flash beyond the window. She stared outside, positive there was something out there.

Aang attempted again with his beautiful—no, that wouldn't due to, say—average-looking prisoner—there that was much more professional. "Now, Katara, perhaps you are more willing to answer some questions."

Katara scooted closer with her chair. Nothing was outside, but the feeling inside her said something was amiss. It made her nervous, quite nervous. She scanned the window again.

"Katara?"

Katara looked back in frustration. "What?!"

Aang demanded, "Will you answer my questions?"

Looking back, Katara sighed and raised an eyebrow, testing the ground. "I will answer your questions if you answer mine."

Aang almost laughed at how intriguing this girl was to him. "Deal. Now, what were you doing on Nowhere?"

"We heard it was a fantastic vacation spot."

Sokka rolled his head in exasperation at his sister's inability to be clever. "Katara, you missed a perfect opportunity to say..." Sokka clears his throat. "We had nowhere else we would rather be. Or, we had nowhere else to go."

Katara had to agree her brother wasn't wrong with those quips. She honestly didn't have his finesse when it came to catchy-one-liners. "Sokka, he asked me the question." She huffed, "But those were good."

"Of course, they are good. Now, Nova Prima Aang, about that cookie."

"Cookie!"

Another flash of something triggered Katara's attention; she whipped around and caught sight of a white suit. "I knew it; there is something out there!"

Aang looked in the direction that Katara indicated; the window was blank except for the night sky. "Out in space?"

"Yes, out in space!"

Aang stepped closer to the window, putting his hands on either side, pressing his face against the glass to peer as far as he could see. "There is nothing out there." Aang laughed, "Good one, trying to trick the Nova Prime won't be that easy." He put his hands on his hips with just enough space to reveal a side of the window and the white-suited whatever making a gesture with the hand at his dark helmet, finger and his thumb in the shape of an 'L' on its forehead.

Katara dropped the pretense that she was bound and marched over to the window. "There is something out there! Will you do a scan of the ship?"

Aang jumped back in surprise. "You were free this whole time?"

Katara waved her hand away in irritation at the obvious and looked out the window but again saw nothing. She pointed at the bay door. "I'm telling you this ship is going to be boarded."

Aang went over to the handcuffs on the floor and held them up. "Who didn't lock these?"

Sokka raised his hands. "There isn't a lock we can't get out of, but I have to admit these were pretty shoddy."

"Lieutenant Sydney!" Aang marched over and waved the paper handcuffs that had been crudely cut and taped together.

"What? Me, no, do that; I prefer cookies. Blame, Elmo; he like construction paper crafts."

The red monster waved his arms. "Elmo loves paper crafts." The crew of monsters and Aang began arguing.

Sokka moved next to his sister. He had to admit the distraction of something outside worked, but his sister was taking her charade a little far. "Katara, you can stop the whole; there is something outside story. You sound a bit coo-coo." Sokka twirled his finger in a circle at his temple.

"Sokka, I swear, there is something out there."

"I don't know…you did get knocked out. "

Katara glanced around her and saw the creature write the word 'hi' on the window. "Look, right there!"

Sokka looked back and saw the words that were slowly crystallizing. "Hmm, that is suspicious."

Suki marched over to Sokka. "Don't think you'll get away again. I'm not going to be dumped again."

Sokka rounded on Suki. "Listen, you know the game we needed that Intel and well…"

"Well, I thought you cared. Excuse me for thinking that you were interested in being my boyfriend."

"Your boyfriend…I thought…" Sokka didn't know. He had to admit he didn't think Suki was interested in him.

"You disappeared while I had to do my duty for the Kyoshi Warrior tribe. You destroyed my work-life balance, jerk, when you stole the Nanquin."

Katara sighed, but she had to stick up for her brother. "Suki, Sokka isn't a jerk, oblivious, messy, goofy…"

Sokka protested, "Katara!"

"I'm trying to say he isn't a jerk." Katara peered out the window. "That whatever is out there hasn't made an appearance; I'm getting worried."

Aang added, "Because nothing is out there…"

Suddenly the side panel door ripped free; the air was immediately sucked out into space. Things not nailed down were being pulled into the vacuum of space. Sokka and Katara grabbed onto the nearest panel. Suki started to lose her grip. Sokka wrapped his arm around Suki, holding her close.

The Count managed to eke out a gasp, "One!" An electric spark ignited an invisible barrier to seal the ship's hull.

Everyone immediately fell to the ground and looked up at the cocky grin of Toph. "Hi, Snoozles and Princess; thought you could skip out on me, eh?"

Katara looked up and said breathlessly, "Told you something was out there."

Katara of the Southern Aquaducian got what she always knew, that she was right, and people or aliens just had to listen to her; she knew what she was talking about…HELLO! Toph might have shown up on the ship but fear not; there won't be any breakdown. At least, for the moment, you can be assured. Rest easy; we have only begun to explore the Lotus Zone.

To Serve Lemurs

Respectfully submitted for your perusal — a Lemur and a Flying Bison. Height for three feet and the other, a little over nine feet. Weight: that isn't polite, so stop asking. Origin: unknown. Motives: Momo - collect the bounty; SHOW ME DA DENARIANS! and Apa - I am Apa, translation - I'm starving! Therein hangs the tale, and we are about to see how a Lemur and Flying Bison handle a real explicit-filled (we are rated T but gotta keep it clean, folks) jerk, also known as Commander Zhou…sorry, sorry, Admiral Zhou.

This episode begins with Momo and Apa locked separately in adjoining cells. Momo has found a piece of rock and is busy carving in the wall. Apa is humming, 'Nobody knows the trouble I've seen.'

Momo wrote the following drabbles:

I have four fingers down; pick which one is up.

Your first and last guess is wrong.

The middle one is correct.

Roses are red

Violets are blue

Sokka, I want to kill you

That's it!

Zhou is a tasar-faced idiot!

Themvp is the best; just sayin'

Who would win a battle–Thanos vs. Ringo Star…Oh, just let it be already.

Fire Lord Ozai is a lunatic with great pecs…it's sad but very true.

Zhou is a real piece of Apa poo!

A voice offered through a small aperture in the wall. "Hey, want any food?"

"What? I'm not eating that!" Momo barely looked up from his carving. "I ain't no fool, putting drugs into our food and going under the knife for what? No thanks, Loser!"

"I am, Apa." Apa bemoaned.

"No, you big carpet, you're not eating anything either." Momo looked him up and down. "Do you want to be at the Circus again, forced to their lame tricks?"

Apa wailed, "I am, Apa."

"You aren't starving." Momo returned to his drawing, now settling on dirty cartoons–

what the wall is dirty, get your mind out of the gutter, reader.

The setting changed to several light years earlier, on the ship. Commander Zhou had put Momo through several hours of experiments and torture.

You don't want to read that do you?

You do?

Well, too bad! Shame on you; we don't hurt animals or muppets in this production!

Now, where were we? Oh yes…we flash backward, no forward, no…whatever, we're back to the beginning…not the beginning-beginning-the beginning of the episode…oh, just READ…

Commander Zhou stared down at the creature. "You have done well, creation."

"I ain't your creation." Momo puffed out his chest. "I'm me, always have been, and always will be."

Zhou said haughtily, "Your 'me' was created by me; therefore, you are mine." Zhou held up his hand as Momo tried to interject. "I won't quibble with the likes of you, but I want to know what you about the Nanquin."

"Nanquin? It sounds more like a McGuffin."

"The Nanquin was taken by those two Southern Aquaducian scum, and now I can't find it."

"Big whoop!" Momo shrugged.

"I am Apa!"

"Shut up, I would eat you all, but you are more valuable alive than on a plate."

"See! I told you! That's why I told you not to eat and fatten up your sweet self."

"I am Apa." Apa smiled with appreciation.

"Of course, I look out for you. You and me, buddy." Momo shook off the momentary sentiments. "Listen, we don't know nothin' about nowhere." He laughed really hard. "Besides, Nowhere will get you a great deal on some guns…my guns!"

Zhou screamed through the bars. "I said I want to know about the Nanquin!"

"I done told you we don't know about the McGuffin…" Momo belched and waved the stink toward Zhou. "Sorry, Nanquin, Sam Spade, I mean, Commander Zhou."

"Admiral Zhou, you insolent fool; you can't begin to understand the Nanquin's power!"

"What I can understand is that you can go suck it!" Momo returned to his drawing, an image of Zhou with a 9-foot tall head and tiny alien body.

"You will think differently when you spend the next thousand years at Boiling Rock."

Momo shrugged. Apa's belly rumbled.

Light years forward…we've arrived at Boiling Rock Prison…

Momo strutted forward with a decided, confident swagger. "This is what I'm talking about!"

"I am Apa."

"Yeah, buddy, I got this; don't you worry."

Sokka exclaimed from the line, "Momo, good to see you, buddy!"

"Don't call me, buddy!" Momo lunged forward, "I should kill you for this!"

Katara rolled her eyes and stepped back into Aang, who was disguised as a Draconian guard, and moved forward. "Excuse me!" Katara added hauntingly with a little knowing wink at Aang.

Aang blushed and then said gruffly, "Watch it, lady."

The recollections of how these five all arrived together at the same place could be explained in an excellent thousand-plus word exposition, but come on, give this writer a break; it has taken this long to get here in the chapter after (cough, cough) how many postings ago? Simply stated, Sokka talked his way out of Toph killing them all and devised a break-in plan—the metamorphosis from being the wise-cracking character to someone who is quite formidable.

'Eye' Behold The Hitch-Hiker

Suspended in time and space, you have already met Zuko. He has been hidden behind a mask and forced to confront his failures. He finds himself hitchhiking across the universe to discover the secret of the Nanquin. In a moment, you will see what lies beneath these tales.

Zuko screamed from the memories. He can remember how he was built after each battle lost with his sister—the pain of the failures coursed through his body of electronics and flesh. He ignores the pain and shuts off the receptors that cause his memories to flow. Doing so distorts his mind of what is real and what is merely a figment.

A tiny purple dragon flutters in front of Zuko. "Welcome, Welcome to your imagination tour. I'm Figment of your Imagination. You may not know why I'm here, but guess what?" The purple dragon turned upside and smiled. "Everyone knows all about the stones of destiny–time…" Figment tickled Zuko, and he flinched. "Zuko, your Reality is taking up Space," Figment stared at Zuko in the eye and then flexed his dragon arms. "Power," Figment held his hand to his heart, "soul, and mind." The dragon saluted, then placed a finger to his snout lips, lifting it away while exclaiming happily. "We can't forget about the best one of all Imagination!"

Zuko groaned. Figment giggled. "Don't be a grumpy Zuko, I know it isn't a stone, but it should be… here we go…." Figment zoomed off and then returned. "Come on with me for this journey…." Figment hummed a little song to himself and then drew a cartoon of Katara's face. "Just turn your imagination loose; anything can happen, like you're in space, flying in space, you want power, but you are blind to what you see, smell, taste, and touch, so listen up; you won't gain the acceptance from others until you accept yourself!" Figment flipped into several wobbly circles and then zipped over to Zuko, yelling into the cyborg's ear. "Listen-well, I said it is always a good time to think!" Zuko winced, and Figment laughed. "What a little stinker you are to think you can lie to yourself." Figment pressed his claws against Zuko's cheeks, "Your true soul desire is to love and be loved in return. Begin to believe it is possible, accept who you are, and let yourself feel that love to finally allow yourself to love Katara."

A tear rolled down Zuko's cyborg cheek. "I can't take any more."

The deep and bored voice of his father echoed. "Boy, have you reconsidered your position?"

Figment flipped backward and sang. "Imagination, imagination. A dream can be a dream come true that you love yourself and Katara, too. One little spark of inspiration is at the heart of your soul. Right at the beginning of the big bang of time, everything new has space to soar, big and wide. One little powerful spark lit up on cue. Imagination, imagination. A dream can be a dream come true for you, too."

Zuko felt a surge through his circuits of power and called out beyond the mask on his face. "I will get it."

"Those are useless words to me." Thanos drummed his golden glove upon the stone throne, which held the six-colored stones; a seventh spot on the wrist of his glove was still empty.

Azula held out her mechanical hand to inspect it. "Dad, give Zuko a break. He almost got the Nanquin."

"No, he is useless; I'm tired of wasting my time on him." Thanos pushed a button, and a large screen showed Ozai standing.

Ozai was interrupted and bluntly showed his irritation at being summoned. "What do you want, Lord Thanos?"

"Boy, what I want is a return on my investment!"

Ozai snorted, "I have no use for him or his sister either. Why do you think I sold both of them to you?"

"Boy, you will do as I say."

"I will no longer do your bidding, Thanos. And stop calling me, Boy!" Ozai stamped his foot and ended the transmission.

The screen went blank. Thanos said without much concern. "Ozai is an idiot, but I don't want to take chances. Zuko, you have one more chance to prove yourself; otherwise, I will cease making modifications and dispose of you once and for all."

The bandages are removed; Zuko can see the light once more. He bowed in front of Thanos. His hate for both men with the title of 'father' filled his heart. "Father, I will retrieve the Nanquin." His mission was clear, and he smiled for once. It was awkward, but it was a smile.

"Don't fail me again, Zuko."

Zuko ran from the sterile world of his hospital prison into freedom. He ran to the waiting flying skipper and hopped into the ship. Azula and Thanos watched it fly away.

"Azula, I trust you will do what is necessary."

"Whatever you say, Dad." Azula strode to the next skipper to pursue her brother.

Readers, this is the Lotus Zone; things work out. It's a mystery of time and space, mainly the need to get characters where they belong…Zuko hitchhikes onto Toph's air balloon and ends up at Boiling Rock…how, why, does it really matter at this point? Just go with it…you've come along this far; you know this story is timey-wimey-wibbly-wobbly.

Katara felt someone following her. She knew if she looked behind her, it would alert the person–alien–that she was aware of their presence. Pausing by a prison hold, she waved at a lounging man in a white body suit and blond spiky hair. "Hey, Ziggy Stardust, how's it hanging?"

"Oh, you know, am I sitting in a tin can or taking protein pills? Who knows, who cares."

"Yes, yes, you got that right…" Katara wasn't listening to Ziggy's answer and fired finger guns at his red zig-zag eye, calling it a day. She walked faster and slipped around a corner in the communal bathroom. As the pursuer rounded the bend, Katara reached out and grabbed them. She threw them against the wall and held a plastic spoon into the covered mask of a Draconian guard. "You better talk fast about why you're following me! By fast, I mean now."

A gruff voice replied, perplexed through the mask. "What is a plastic spoon going to do?"

Katara held it in front of his uniform. "It will hurt more when I cut out your heart with it."

The mask lifted upwards and revealed the scar and cyborg eye of Zuko. He hissed, "It's me." Dropping down his mask, he stated brusquely. "Now, will you put down that spoon and listen to me."

Katara dropped the spoon from Zuko's heart but held it in her hand just in case. "What are you doing here?"

Zuko replied indignantly, "To save you."

"Save me." Katara lowered her voice. "I do not need saving."

Zuko added sarcastically. "Says someone currently hanging out in the Boiling Rock's toilets."

Katara smiled at his joke and then felt suspicious. Zuko must have come for the Nanquin. "You are here for the item."

"The item?" Zuko was shocked. Sokka sent the item here? "The item is actually here?"

Katara folded her arms and cocked her hip. Zuko was such a lousy liar. "Please, like you didn't know."

"I didn't!" Zuko said sincerely. "I came to save you." Zuko removed his helmet. He stepped forward with such intensity. He felt a surge of purpose and another new feeling, finally knowing his destiny.

Katara didn't step back. "How did you know I was here?"

"I hitched a ride on Toph's air-ship and overhead the crew talking about you all being in Boiling Rock and that Sokka had this grand denarian money-making scheme. They also mentioned that they were lucky no one could overhear them because that would be really inconvenient."

"No one better overhear us, or I'll have to cut out their heart," Katara said loudly and to no one particular.

The toilet flushed, and Moloka Dar came out of the stall. He held his arms up as he side-stepped away from Katara and Zuko; both were glaring at the former prisoner of Kyln, who helped Thanos by giving him information. "I was here doing my business." Moloka Dar pointed back to the stall. "In the toilet, not conducting illegal trading or anything. It is kind of awkward overhearing these proclamations. I didn't want to keep hanging out in there, overhearing."

"Get out!" Both of them yelled at him.

"Sure, sure," Moloka Dar slipped out and ran far away. He didn't want to die; he was only a minor character.

Zuko resumed his speech. "When I found out you were here, I had to come and save you." Zuko stepped closer. "I don't want to fight you anymore. I want to be with you."

"Really?" Katara blushed and then felt flustered, not believing Zuko could have changed. "You are actually here for me and not for the item that you insisted you needed and pursued us relentlessly for, but now, you have changed your mind?"

"I wanted the item to buy my freedom, but I don't need to buy my freedom anymore."

Katara wetted her lips. "You don't?"

"No, I'm free because I choose it. I'm free because I won't be a slave to anyone anymore. I'm free because I don't need anyone to tell me whether or not I'm honorable to be honorable."

"But your fathers…"

"They are no fathers to me anymore. Thanos views me as an object he created and can use for his own ends. My birth father, Ozai, gave up his rights the day he sold me. They deserve to be defeated! The balance of the Universe needs to be restored."

"Zuko…" Katara reached out to caress the side of his face, running along the cyborg part gently. "Aren't you afraid of being pursued?"

"I'm not afraid anymore…part of me died today, and what is reborn is a man searching to right the wrongs committed by his fathers. Katara, it is honorable to help you, but I want to help you even more."

Their faces were inches apart. Desperate to believe Zuko, but afraid to trust him. Katara said breathlessly. "You are only telling me what I want to hear."

Zuko ran his hand along Katara's blue face, down her shoulder and the length of her arm to clasp her hand with the spoon. "No, I'm telling this to prove to you that I'm worthy to love you."

Katara dropped the makeshift weapon and breathed out all of her trepidation. She smiled and then leaned forward, closing her eyes. Zuko followed suit, finally feeling like he had come safely home. As their lips met, they both encountered a hairy paw.

A what? You've been waiting for this kiss, and…calm down, readers, especially in some faraway galaxy, basement, tropical island, or…you get the idea.

Momo intercepted the kiss. "Buh-buh-buh, none of us want to see that!" He wiped his paw against the wall.

"I am, Apa!"

Momo scoffed. "You and maybe some mythical readers want to, but you're the only ones."

"I am, Apa?"

Momo said loudly to no one in particular. "Yes, yes, we have readers; hard to believe, I know, but it is true."

Zuko sputtered, "Why, you insolent raccoon."

"What did you call me?!" Momo leaped on top of Zuko's head and started pounding on his head. "I'm a lemur!"

"Get off of me!" Zuko tried grabbing Momo, who was jumping from Zuko's shoulder, head, to his other shoulder.

Katara was disappointed that their kiss got interrupted but switched to her usual annoyance that the aliens and people around her were a bunch of bumbling idiots. "Momo, stop it; we're working together, alright!"

Zuko and Momo both said at the same time, "I'm not working with him!"

"I am, Apa."

Katara nodded and scratched under Apa's chin. "Exactly, teamwork; you need to work on that idea…" Katara glanced between Zuko and Momo, "Both of you."

"I came to save you!" Zuko folded his arms.

Katara crossed her arms and sighed, "Alright, I know this whole I'm changed is new for you, but you came to help me, which implies everyone, including Momo. And let's get something straight; I do not need saving. I do the saving around here."

"That's right, sis!" Sokka came into the room with Suki behind him. "What did I miss?" He looked at Zuko and Momo's sour faces, noted that Zuko was now on Boiling Rock, shrugged, and waved his hand not to get some recap that would probably involve something mushy between his sister and the cyborg freak-a-zoid. "Forget it; I don't need the exposition of what transpired. We've got bigger problems." "Speaking of exposition…." Sokka's voice became robotic and stilted. "You see, sources revealed that Dad is alive and has been imprisoned here at Boiling Rock because it was thought he was the chosen one, but Aang…enter Aang…"

Aang came into the room. "Hi, everyone; great to be part of the team, late to the scene, but ready to contribute to the gang."

Sokka continued in his robotic voice. "Katara is revealed to be the chosen one. Zhou is heading back to Boiling Rock to capture her, so we are short on time to escape." Sokka shook his head and looked around, confused. "What just happened?"

Zuko looked around the room, "Who was Sokka talking to?"

Katara looked at her nails and picked at a hangnail. "Just go with it; Sokka is catching the readers up to speed."

"What readers?" Zuko kicked open a stall door and found it empty.

"Metaphorical readers, of course, you idiot!" Momo shook his head.

Suki lifted up her helmet and giggled. "I think it is cute when Sokka does that. He did it at the library the first time I met him."

Zuko stopped looking at the toilet stalls. "Wait, Katara is the chosen one?"

Katara glared at Zuko. "I hope you're not implying that girl couldn't be chosen one because that would be sexist."

Sokka and Suki rubbed their noses and made cute sounds together. Everyone in the room, except Apa, turned away disgusted.

"I am, Apa."

Katara smiled at Apa indulgently, "Apa, you are a hopeless romantic. Yes, Suki and Sokka are together now."

Aang came over to stand next to Katara. "Hi, Katara. Did you miss me?" Aang hoped that Katara would snuggle noses with him.

Katara replied distractedly with slight indulgent sweetness. "Hi, Aang, what, no, I mean, I was only gone shortly from when we saw each other at the prison in-take zone."

Zuko came closer. "What? He is part of the gang. I thought Aang was Nova Prime."

"I can be Nova Prime and part of the gang. In fact, we formed this gang on my ship." Aang turned to Katara. "Right, Katara?!"

"Yes, Aang is correct, but…"

Zuko pointed to his chest. "I have been part of the gang since the beginning of the story."

"Are we really in a story?" Suki looked around and then under the stalls.

"Will you all shut up!" Toph came over via Sokka's secret uniform intercom disguised as a Draconian emblem. "I cannot take these two love-sick idiots going on about Princess Stick-up her …"

"Toph!" Katara barked.

"Fine, I'm not hiding out on this airship in space listening to mushy junk. Are you going to get the Nanquin or what, Squeaker?"

Momo spat on the floor. "I agree with the Blind Bandit; I don't do nuthin' for free, so let's get the Nanquin and split the take."

Zuko nodded and asked gruffly. "What's the plan?"

Sokka whipped out a map and unrolled it, revealing the layout of Boiling Rock prison. "I purchased this on the way over." His finger landed on the hold, indicating the giant X that marked the spot. "We've got to break out of the prison and into the hold and then break out of the hold and back into the prison to break into the cell to free Dad, cause a major distraction so we can break into the main controller site to shut down the whole prison which will allow us to break out everyone from Boiling Rock. It is pretty simple and straightforward with just enough room for fancy fighting." Sokka signed with happiness. "Love a good plan, so let's cue the music…"

The drums begin to beat with the guitar solo riffing in back and fourth pattern…yes, we've got the beginning of Led Zepplin's Immigrant Song… Ah-ah, ah! Ah-ah, ah!

The plan begins as scheduled- ooo-look how Katara and Suki did two triple flips in the air…fancy…

We come from the land of the ice and snow

From the midnight sun where the hot springs flow

The hammer of the gods

Will drive our ships to new lands

To fight the horde, sing and cry

Valhalla, I am coming

Got it, nice; Momo jumped on top of Apa to reach out and punch out the guard (that's gotta hurt), taking the key, throwing it to Sokka…

On we sweep with threshing oar

Our only goal will be the western shore

Sokka punches a bunch of guards with a karate chop here, slip under a door, karate chop there, and manages to project the music to all the cells…nice touch and rockin' distraction (see, what I did there...huh, huh, come on, it's cute.)

Ah-ah, ah!

Zuko and Aang both fight each other about who will get to free Katara's Dad. Hakoda walks out of the cell, grabs both paramours by the neck, and tells them that his daughter will choose who she is with, so stop acting like immature babies (paraphrased, of course…)

We come from the land of the ice and snow

From the midnight sun where the hot springs flow

How soft your fields so green

Can whisper tales of gore

Of how we calmed the tides of war

We are your overlords

On we sweep with threshing oar

Our only goal will be the western shore

So now you'd better stop and rebuild all your ruins

For peace and trust can win the day despite of all your losing

Wow, they all made it to the hold but didn't judge the size. There are a lot of people in there. Suki is sitting on Sokka's lap. Katara is driving, much to the chagrin of Zuko and Aang. Everyone else is kind of squashed and feeling uncomfortable, hoping the song will be over.

Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh

Ahh, ah

Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh

Record scratches and ends, that's enough, for the love of Marvel & Avatar the Last Airbender...it is hot in that hold.

We love when a plan comes together, perfectly outlined and full of implied hijinx. The gang made it outside for Toph to take them to their final destination…The Collector. The gang isn't alone, for Azula has hitched a ride-along. Before she jumped ships, she typed in a message with details to all the baddies–Zhou, Ozai, & Thanos–giving them the location so all our stories could collide. Now the question comes to mind: "Where is this place and when is it?" The answer is it doesn't make any difference because the old saying happens to be true…We're on a road Nowhere…"I believe you're going...my way? Lesson to be learned in the Lotus Zone.

Turn up the music -

Well, we know where we're goin'

But we don't know where we've been

And we know what we're knowin'

But we can't say what we've seen

And we're not little children

And we know what we want

And the future is certain

Give us time to work it out

We're on a road to nowhere

Come on inside

Takin' that ride to nowhere

We'll take that ride

I'm feelin' okay this mornin'

And you know

We're on a road to paradise

Here we go, here we go

We're on a ride to nowhere

Come on inside

Takin' that ride to nowhere

We'll take that ride

Maybe you wonder where you are

I don't care

Here is where time is on our side

Take you there, take you there

We're on a road to nowhere

There's a city in my mind

Come along and take that ride