A/N: I'm sorry for the delay in getting this chapter posted. I've been sick for over two weeks now and am just now feeling well enough to start editing and writing again. This is a shorter chapter, but some longer chapters are coming!

Gabby smiled as she stepped out of the cab and noticed what hotel they were at. Kelly had convinced her to let him take care of all of the details for the trip and she'd let him. He hadn't clued her in on any of the details, and she hadn't asked. "You booked the same hotel," she said, turning to Kelly as he came up next to her, pulling their suitcase.

Kelly shrugged, grinning. "Last time I was here, I ran into this gorgeous woman and ended up having amazing sex with her. I thought maybe I'd get lucky twice," he teased.

Gabby rolled her eyes, shaking her head. "You're hopeless, Kelly Severide," she told him, biting back a smile.

The couple headed inside, heading to the desk to check in. "Hi, I'm checking in; the reservation is under Kelly Severide," Kelly informed the clerk at the desk.

The clerk quickly typed something into the computer, finding the reservation and then handing Kelly the room keys. "Enjoy your stay," she told them.

Kelly grabbed the keys, and glancing at the folder for the room number, smiled before slipping them into his pocket. He took Gabby's hand and together they walked towards the elevator. Once inside, Kelly pressed the button for the 14th floor.

Gabby raised her eyebrows. "14, huh?"

Kelly shrugged. "They just happened to have the room open," he replied, grinning. "I figured if we were going to come back to where it all started, we might as well come back to exactly where it all started."

The elevator doors opened and they walked down the hall to room 1412. Kelly pressed the key to the sensor and opened the door, motioning for Gabby to go in ahead of him. Once they were both inside the room, he set the suitcase down and pulled her into his arms. "Well, we're back," he told her, leaning down and kissing her.

"We are," replied Gabby, smiling. She looked around the room. "It's crazy to think that it's already been over a year and a half since we were here. But also crazy to think that it's only been a year and a half. So much has happened since then." She laughed, "Who would have thought then how things would end up?"

"I definitely didn't," Kelly admitted.

The next couple of days flew by. Despite them coming to New York to talk and get a fresh start, they both found themselves trying to find things to do to avoid having the conversation that they both knew was needed. Suddenly it was their last day in New York and they'd be going home in the morning.

Kelly had just finished showering when he walked into the room to find Gabby staring at the window. "What are you thinking about?" he asked softly, wrapping his arms around her from behind.

"Everything," Gabby replied sadly. "Us. Brooklyn. The accident. Chicago. Puerto Rico." She turned around to face Kelly. "We came here to talk about everything, but it feels like we've spent the whole time avoiding it."

Kelly sighed. "I know," he admitted. "These past several months…they've been hard. It feels like there's something hanging over us, something stopping us from finally being happy."

"I've felt it, too," Gabby said softly. "Since the hospital, since we lost Brooklyn, nothing's been the same. Before, everything came so easy. We were so happy and excited and in love. Then we lost her, and nothing's seemed right since. It feels different, almost like it's work." She laughed sadly. "Which is crazy, because we're supposed to be in love. And I feel like I'm in love. But it just feels like everything's wrong." She pulled free of Kelly's arms and walked over to the bed, perching on the edge.

"I feel the same way," Kelly informed her softly. "I just shrugged it off at first, sure that it was just because we were grieving. But it hasn't gone away. It's like losing Brooklyn changed everything." He paused for a moment, gathering his thoughts. "I love you, Gabby. I loved you before we lost our daughter, and I still love you now. But recently it just feels like there's this distance between us. And I don't know how to fix it.

"Kelly, I don't know who I am anymore," Gabby told him. "This past year and a half…so much has happened. Finding out I was pregnant, then losing the baby, the accident…and I just can't seem to find myself. I love you, Kelly, I do, but I can't help but wonder if this was a mistake. If we're meant to be together, why has it been so hard?" Gabby cried, tears running down her cheeks. "With Matt, it was easy until it wasn't, and then it was incredibly hard. With us…it's seemed easy, but nothing has come easy for us.

"When Matt and I got divorced, I swore to myself that if I ever fell in love and got married again, it would be forever. And I want that for us, Kelly. More than anything. But Kelly, you were barely out of your relationship with Stella when we slept together, and then suddenly I was showing up at your door, pregnant. I just…I can't help but wonder how much of what we feel is real, and how much is because of the baby. What if the feelings that we have aren't real, and are just because of everything that happened? I just, I can't go through it again. I can't let myself believe that this is real, that we're forever, and then have it all ripped away again.

"What are you saying, Gabby?" Kelly asked, although he wasn't sure he wanted to know the answer.

Gabby took a deep breath and tried to wipe away her tears. Her efforts were in vain, though, as they just kept coming. "I'm saying," she managed to get out, "I think we need to take a break. We need some time apart. I need to figure out who I am again, and I think we both need some time to figure out us. But we can't do that if we're together all the time."

"So…what?" Kelly asked, struggling to keep his own tears at bay.

"I'm going back to Puerto Rico for a few months. Antonio said that they could really use the help," Gabby informed him, careful to avoid eye contact. She wasn't sure she'd be able to go through with this if she looked at him and saw the hurt that she felt reflected on his face. "It will only be for three months, and then I'll be back," she rushed to add. "It will give us some time apart to think and figure things out."

"And what if we don't?" Kelly asked softly. "What if in three months you come back and we're both still in the same place?"

Gabby finally looked up at him, the pain etched on his face breaking her heart even more than it already was. "Then I guess we'll have our answer."

When the next morning came, Kelly and Gabby flew back to Chicago, the heaviness that had been hanging over both of them for the past year now evident, neither of them having the energy anymore to pretend that everything was okay; both of them feeling heartbroken and alone.