A Streetcar Named Marge: Marge joins a drama class playing a musical version of A Streetcar Called Desire but the teacher, voiced by Jon Lovitz, is horrible and strict. And Homer is ignoring her again or whinging about his pudding can. They were writing how Marge gets into her role by seeing Homer's selfishness like Marlon Brando's.
Meanwhile Maggie has to stay at a nursery with a cruel matron who won't allow pacifiers and initiates a Great Escape! Mmmmm Richard Attenborough... And Oscar goes batshit insane over his obsession with Marlon Brando.
PlotThe Chalkboard gag is "My name is not Dr Death..."
"No that's Vincent Price in the movie Madhouse." said Oscar.
Bart winced, baffled at him before the bell rang and he skates home.
The couch gag is the couch turning into an octopus monster and eating the Simpsons.
The episode starts with the kids and Homer blankly watching a catwalk fashion show about perfumes. It is hosted by Troy McClure.
"Live from beautiful Laughlin, Nevada... it's the Miss American Girl Pageant. Brought to you by: Smell like Streep For cheap! I'm your host, Troy McClure. And now, here come the ladies!" said Troy McClure. Surprisingly he didn't reference all the silly, random movies he has been in.
"Kids I'm going out to my audition so I've bought Krusty TV Dinners." said Marge.
"Where you going again?" Homer asked.
"Hmmmm! I told you twenty times tonight Homer! I'm going to audition for a musical remake of A Streetcar named Desire." said Marge.
"Cooooool! That's got Marlon Brando in it!" Oscar cheered.
"Eyes on the screen boy..." Homer nagged for him to pay attention to the TV.
"Homer... I'm getting square eyes and I'm trying to show Marge I'm interested in her musical because you're not!" Oscar whined.
"D'ooooooh!" Homer sighed. He turned off the TV.
"Hey!" Bart and Lisa whined.
"Sorry kids. But your mother has something to say..." Homer sighed.
"Homer you only have to tear your eyes away from that dreadful thing for one minute!" Marge nagged. "I said I am auditioning for a musical version of A Streetcar Named Desire." said Marge.
"What's that?" Homer asked.
"It's a movie..." Marge sighed.
"With Marlon Brando in it!" Oscar cheered. He put on a Don Vito voice. "I'll make him an offer he can't refuse."
"Hmmmm... Marlon doesn't do anything Godfather like in this film Oscar. He plays a selfish ignorant brother in law to Blanche DuBois, a French American living in Downtown New Orleans in an Apartment Block like we used to when Bart was just a baby." said Marge.
"And he's not likely to be in this production Oscar... It's just everyone in town auditioning..." said Lisa.
"Kallae Kistnae..." Oscar hissed in gibberish.
The Simpsons just sighed exasperated with his bouts of gibberish.
...
Later Marge strangely didn't go out and just read her lines while everyone watched TV.
"Stanley please stop or I'll call Stella!" Marge sang
Then she was on the family piano playing and singing.
"Marge keep it down!" Homer whined.
"Homer! I have to rehearse!" Marge nagged.
"Rehearse? Ha! That's all you use your piano for?" Lois Griffin taunted. "I'm a full time mom, a housewife and I take piano lessons with all the local kids!"
"Well good for you! I don't have time for that! Bitch..." said Marge. She continued reciting her songs she needed to sing.
Oscar came in stroking Snowball II and reciting Don Vito. "You come to the Corleones asking for a favour... I don't know whether to kill you or kiss you..."
"Oscar please. Marlon doesn't do anything like that in this movie..." said Marge.
"That's the only Marlon Brando film I've seen..." said Oscar. "I really need to see his other work."
"Yes you do Oz. He is in so many cool movies!" said Bart. "Wait! That'll just encourage you!"
"Well, if I get a part I want you all to watch A Streetcar Named Desire." said Marge.
"Awwwwwww..." everyone groaned in boredom.
Maggie played her xylophone.
"Maggie stop playing that..." Homer whined.
Later Marge put on her coat.
"And where do you think you're going..." Homer asked.
"I told you all evening! To my Audition!" Marge nagged.
"Uh I think I'd know if you told me! I'm not stupid... Kids back me up." said Homer.
"No way man!"
"Nu Uh..." said Lisa.
"Nope!" said Oscar.
"Why you littles! Back me up!" Homer strangled Bart and Lisa for not backing him up.
"Homer stop that!" Marge took Bart and Lisa from him.
She went to her audition.
...
Wiggum was singing nonsense to get his voice in tune.
A stage hand face palmed as Otto turned up.
"My name is Otto! And I love Blotto!" sId Otto.
"Why does he always audition... He has no acting talent..." the stage hand sighed to his colleague.
Marge was surprised to see Ned auditioning.
"Well, howdy-do, neighbor." said Ned.
"Hi, Ned. I didn't know you were an actor." said Marge.
"Oh, indeedily-doodily." said Ned speaking in gibberish.
He explained he previously played Blanche DuBois at an all male acting school. Um...
Oscar had auditioned while turning up for auditions dressed as a clown...
Oscar honks a circus horn.
"Oscar there's no clowns in this play..." Marge sighed.
There better be...
Suddenly a fat drama teacher bursted in. "I am your teacher, Llewellyn Sinclair! You may address me as Mr Sinclair!" Marge got the impression straight away based on his put downs of performances that he was very strict and mean...
"Now I'm not an easy man to work with. I once reduced an entire cast of fourth graders to tears directing a production of Hats for Hanukkah!" But I think the review, Best performance ever speaks for itself!" said Llewellyn Sinclair. He put a sharp accent on the Hs in Hats for Hanukkah.
He then asked all the men to take off their shirts.
"Take off your shirts!" He yelled. They did so.
"No. Too thin... Gunshot wounds... Join a gym... (He said rudely to Wiggum)" then he saw Krusty's third nipple and screamed before fainting.
After recovering he decided Ned was perfect for the role of Stanley.
Then he got all the women to sing for the roles of Blanche.
They were all terrible according to Llewellyn Sinclair. And Marge just went "Laaaaaaa..." Marge did you honestly think that would be good...?!
"You were all terrible! Forget it! I'll put a production on in Shelbyville!"
Marge was calling Homer disappointed she didn't get a part... "You're right Homer. I didn't get a part. Outside interests are stupid... I'll pick up a bucket of Chicken... Extra skins... Bread rolls... No you don't need pudding... Okay! I'll get a triple chocolate ice cream tub!"
However Sinclair changed his mind. He liked Marge. She was perfect! "Stop bothering my Blanche!" He screamed down the phone at Homer before putting the phone down.
Marge gasped.
...
At breakfast the next morning.
"I play the role of Blanche DuBois! A southern belle driven insane by her bullish brother in law Stanley. Played by Ned Flanders..." said Marge.
"Are there any giant killer robots in this play?" Bart asked.
"No." said Marge.
"Any laser eyed mutant alligator men?"
"No!" Marge got slightly annoyed by Bart's questions.
"Don't ask stupid questions boy. Any frontal nudity?" Homer asked.
"No!" Marge got annoyed.
"Oh! Oh! I wanna ask a stupid question!" Oscar begged putting his hand up. "Any Godfather in it?"
"No! Oscar for the last time Marlon Brando did other things as well as Godfather..." Marge ranted.
"Marge why are you doing this..." Homer groaned.
"I haven't been in a play since high school, and I thought it would be a good chance to meet some other adults." said Marge.
"Interesting..." said Homer.
"You know, I spend all day alone with Maggie, and sometimes it's like I don't even exist." said Marge.
"Marge of course you exist... who else would be at home all day looking after Maggie?" said Homer.
"Wait I've got it! Any jive talking robots?" Bart asked being stupid.
"Lay on some more boogily moogily brother!" Oscar spoke in jive. Ie "I wanna hear more of your silly suggestions buddy!"
Marge sighed exasperated. "No Bart! There's nothing ridiculous like that in the play...
"Gorillas wearing tutus?" Oscar asked.
"No!" said Marge.
"Is Whoopi Goldberg in it?" Bart asked.
"No! Now stop asking stupid questions!" Homer yelled.
"Do elves have to use double the q-tips to clean their ears?" Oscar asked.
Homer growled and strangled him.
Lisa sighed.
...
Back at the theatre.
Everyone who didn't get cut introduced themselves and their parts. Otto just wanted to rhyme and say he was Blotto.
"Get this man outta here..." Sinclair wanted him off the play.
Otto left.
Then Marge and Ned had a scene.
"Now Stanley, you grab Blanche in a passionate display and throw her onto the bed and pin her down!" said Sinclair.
"Okily dokily!" said Ned. He grabbed Marge and threw her onto a bed and pinned her down menacingly and growled. Mmmmm kinky...
Maggie grabbed his glasses and put them on! XD.
"Awwww! And me without a camera!" Ned sighed. Yeah kids and cute furry toons playing with people's glasses...
"My Sister runs a day care center. Please leave your offspring there please..." Sinclair said rudely.
Marge took Maggie to fancy nursery. The lady running it was clearly the spitting image of Sinclair. And yes she turns out horrible too!
"Maggie is allergic to strained pears... She just stopped liking them after David Tennant babysat... And she likes a warm bottle of milk..." said Marge.
"Ha! A bottle! Marge, do you know what Maggie is saying when she reaches for a bottle..." asked the nursery owner.
"Baba?" Marge asked.
"She's saying, I am a leech! At this school we teach Babies to be independent!" said the bitch owner of the nursery.
"Eeeeew! Leeches!" Oscar groaned.
Eventually Marge after some convincing that this was the only nursery in Springfield not under investigation she left Maggie.
"I'm sorry Maggie but we don't allow these here." The lady confiscated her pacifier and put it in a tray in a locker.
Maggie was sad.
Meanwhile in A streetcar named Desire.
"Don't you ever talk that way to me. "Pig," "Polack," "disgusting," "vulgar," "greasy" — those kind of words have been on your tongue and your sister's tongue just too much around here. What do you think you are, a pair of queens?" Ned as Stanley yelled.
"I have two pairs of queens, cough up rube..." Oscar was playing poker with Lionel Hutz.
"Get out!" Llewellyn Sinclair yelled at him for interrupting the rehearsals.
...
At home one evening Homer and the kids are watching that perfume fashion show again. Troy McClure was introducing the judges.
"Token black judge Drederick Tatum..."
"I like to eat ears..."
"That's racist! You should pick a judge regardless of what they look like as their talent for judging! Not to fill in a checklist that you're giving equal opportunities to everyone!" Lisa ranted.
"Quiet Lisa!" Homer barked. He's a jerk wad in this episode...
A mean judge made a cruel remark about a contestant.
"If you had lived 2,000 years ago and sung like that, I think they would have stoned you."
"Hahaha! What a bitch!" Bart giggled.
"Bart!" Homer yelled. "Watch your language or I'll put soap in your mouth!"
Marge went to bed that night only to find a horse's head in the bed. She screamed a bloodcurdling scream before finding it was Lisa's old horsey head on a stick toy.
Oscar came in quoting the Godfather again. "You crazy coot! I don't know whether to kill you or kiss you!"
"Oscar this has to stop! There are no Godfather parts in this play just because Marlon Brando is in it!" Marge ranted.
"Sorry..." Oscar said glumly.
Marge sighed.
Helen Lovejoy then came over because she's playing the role of Stella.
Apparently the play is about Blanche trying to explain to her that Stanley is a pig and a terrible husband.
It also stars Potato Nose according to Nelson.
"You're married to a madman." Blanche/Marge explained to Stella/Helen.
"You're a mad man! A mad man!" The Persian messenger from 300 yelled.
Marge and Helen were exasperated by these cameos. Well they're funny so there...
"I'll stop when you FREAKIN' LET ME INCLUDE GODFATHER IN THIS PLAY!" Oscar yelled.
Marge cringed.
"You crazy coot!" Oscar yelled.
Plot 2At Drama school Marge wasn't showing enough passion during a scene with Ned.
"You're a dame and I'm a fella!" Ned sung.
"Stop or I'll call Stella!" Marge sung.
"No no no! Marge you are supposed to be repulsed by this disgusting man! Show some passion!" Sinclair ranted.
"I'm sorry Mr Sinclair but I can't feel repulsed looking at Ned..." said Marge.
"Then imagine him as some who does repulse you then!" Sinclair yelled.
Marge thought of shirtless Ned. Mmmmm! Stupid sexy Flanders... then tried to imagine him as someone else. Unfortunately she imagined that gay Puerto Rican pirate from her reoccurring day dreams after reading novels during the day. Then Sean Connery then finally Homer in his underwear burping.
That night Homer was playing bowling on his Gameboy. XD Gameboy.
"Homer... Homer! Homer turn that thing off and pay attention!" Marge nagged.
"Gutter ball..." said the game.
"Awwww! Marge I almost had a strike." Homer whined.
"Homer! This is more important than a stupid video game! I want you to give your opinion on my performance as Blanche!" Marge explained.
"Marge I think we all have more important things in our lives than your little fantasy world..." Homer said rudely.
Marge grumbled angrily.
"What about my little fantasy world..." Oscar smirked.
Bart passed by on his Gameboy.
"Hey Dad put Peekimon Version A on and get your butt to the Peekimon centre so we can trade! I want a Psychic Tapier for my Smokegeist."
Homer giggled like a kid and took out his bowling gamepak and put in Peekimon A to trade Peekimon with Bart.
Marge facepalmed.
...
At Nursery Maggie was trying to find substitutes for her beloved pacifier such as a crayon, a toy block and an albino Bart Simpson doll. but couldn't and sighed.
"Ay carumba a giant baby!" said the albino Bart doll. "And keep me away from direct sunlight! I burn!"
Maggie sadly sucked on the doll.
Then the Great Escape theme played as she sneaked about waking up two babies to help her.
They went to the pacifier locker and decided to make a tower out of toys to climb up. Maggie climbed up and tried to get her pacifier out through the locker vents but couldn't.
The other babies locked around thinking "Ho boy..."
Suddenly the toys all collapsed with a loud crash. The nursery matron heard them!
"Don't like to nap eh? We have a place for babies like you! The box!" said the matron. She took Maggie.
Maggie's new friend threw her a ball. She caught it.
She was put in a play pen. She threw the ball about and sighed while bouncing it about.
Elsewhere.
Bart Simpson was riding his skateboard around Evergreen Terrace.
Oscar was loafing around.
"Hey kid." said Bart.
"Hey Bart." said Oscar.
Bart stopped his board and trod on the end to catapult it up and catch it stylishly.
"I'm thinking of going swimming." said Oscar.
"Can you swim?" Bart asked.
"Not without water wings." said Oscar.
Bart sighed. "Well you need to learn to get out of needing water wings..."
Oscar pouted. "I will, don't rush me..."
...
Homer dropped Marge and Oscar off at recitals. Well actually Oscar's only there to goof off.
However during recitals Marge has enough of Homer's boorish behaviour especially when Mr Sinclair has to yell at him and throw pocket change at him when he wants money for the vending machine.
She's reading her lines, probably the bit about the party of apes. YOU MANIACS! Ahem sorry.
"Marge... I need money for the candy machine..."
"Here! Take it! Take it all now stop disturbing my Blanche!" Llewellyn Sinclair threw pocket change at Homer while shouting at him for bothering his actresses and actors. Homer went to the vending machine,
Which he promptly gets into a fight with causing it spill candy.
Marge is annoyed by Homer constantly calling her name she smashes a bottle and brandishes it at him.
Homer screams.
"Okay from the top." said Llewellyn Sinclair.
Wiggum groaned.
"Silence!" Sinclair screeched in a fiery mood worthy of Vulcan of himself.
He then read the opening narration as he decided the cast were a bit weak on the opening. Also because I'm picking out bits that are amusing...
From the official script!
...from a tinny piano being played with the infatuated fluency of brown fingers. This "Blue Piano" expresses the spirit of the life which goes on here.
Yes a BLUE piano!
"Oh my festive flapjacks! Oscar's Orchestra!" Oscar screamed.
Marge face palmed exasperated.
"WILL YOU STOP ACTING LIKE A CLOWN!" Sinclair yelled.
"No because that's my character in the play..." said Oscar.
"THERE'S NO CLOWNS IN A STREETCAR NAMED DESIRE!" The drama teacher yelled.
...
At dinner Homer is frightened of Marge.
He trembled, his cutlery rattling as he struggled to pick it up.
Marge is talking in character as Blanche with a southern belle accent.
"Homer, be a doll and pass me some of that gravy to pour on my biscuits..." said Marge in a southern accent.
"Marge why are you talking like that?" Oscar asked.
"I have to stay in character." said Marge.
"Mom would it help if I talk like this?" Lisa did a southern belle accent.
"Sure thing hon!" said Marge in a southern accent.
"What about like this? Awright guvnor?" Bart did a silly British accent.
Oscar glared at him.
"Bart that's not helping..." said Marge in a southern accent.
"Mom pass some more of that biscuit." Lisa asked in a southern accent.
"Dad can I sloth of school tomorrow? Gotta a pain in my Gullabah!" said Bart in a silly British accent
"Well hohohon! Excuuuuuse Moi Garçon! I'm like a rose and I'm feeling rather thorny!" Oscar did a bad french accent.
"You stop that now Limey!" Bart yelled.
"Frog!" Oscar retorted.
"Peasant!" Bart retorted.
"Yank!" Oscar yelled.
"Stop it! Both of you stop it!" Marge broke character to tell them off.
"I'm living in a cuckoo clock!" Homer ranted.
"I once lived in a cuckoo clock!" said Oscar.
Bart winced at him. "You don't say..."
...
Marge was reciting with Ned. Well first she goes off to see him first.
"But what about pudding?" Homer groaned.
"Homer for Pete's sake! We have canned puddings in the refrigerator!" Marge snapped at him as he was being annoying.
Homer sighed.
"Don't take too long Mrs S. I made chocolate pudding in my diaper!" said Oscar.
"Eeeeeeewww!" Bart and Lisa groaned.
"Oz! Gross!" Bart groaned.
Marge soon left to recite her lines for smashed bottle scene with Ned.
Homer had a canned pudding for dessert. Mmmmmmm! Canned pudding... However the ring broke off. "Aaaaaagh! My pudding is trapped forever!"
He finds Marge at the Flanders house. "Maaaaaaarge! Oh Maaaaaaaarge! He screamed like Stanley.
"Hmmmmmm!" Marge groaned.
"That's what I have to sound like?! Now I've never yelled like that before..." said Ned.
"Let's just do the bottle scene again..." said Marge breaking a bottle in a threatening manner.
We cut to an overhead view of Evergreen Terrace and Ned Screaming horribly.
The next day Homer was watching Marge being put in a squad car being arrested.
"Good riddance..." said Homer shutting the curtains.
"Oz no Dark Simpsons style edits..." Bart sighed.
Oscar stuck his tongue out at him.
Bart sighed.
"I got a few Marlon Brando movies for ya. Don't ask how I did..."
"I won't ask! Except about how d'ya make biscuits?!" Oscar asked being silly.
Bart sighed.
...
The next day the cast minus Marge, because she's in jail for maiming Ned, were reciting their lines at drama class.
Ned had a bloody gauze over one of his pecs.
"STELLLLLAAAAAAA!" Stanley is infamous for just screaming Stella through this film/play/novel. Was it a novel? It probably was.
There were blue pianos in the opening scene of the New Orleans club.
"OMG! Oscar's Orchestra!" Oscar yelled, distracting Apu.
And there was gracious use of the N word! Hey it was a different time back then!
"Excuse me Mr Sinclair. Does the narration really need to retain the use of the word (N word!)" Dr Hibbert sighed.
"Yes..." said the teacher.
That night Homer was supposed to be reading the kids a bedtime story but was playing on his Gameboy. Pokemon music was blaring.
"Daaaaad! You're supposed to be reading me Little House on the Prarie!" Lisa yelled.
"Well Dad is having a Peekimon battle with me so there!" said Bart.
Lisa growled.
"So is Mom gonna get bail in time for her play?" Bart asked.
"I dunno... I hope there's bowling in it." said Homer.
"WHY WOULD THERE BE FLIPPIN BOWLING IN A PLAY ABOUT TWO LADIES DEALING WITH AN EXTREMELY RUDE HUSBAND?!" Oscar shouted.
Homer sighed.
We cut to Oscar being dumped in his cot bed.
He grunted annoyed.
"Well apparently there's bowling in the play but that's besides the point..." Lisa sighed. "I can't wait for Mom to get home..."
Oscar sighed. "I miss her too, but when you shove a broken bottle into someone's chest you go to jail..."
Lisa sighed feeling irked.
Homer was still playing Peekimon with Bart.
"No my flower toad!" Homer groaned.
Bart laughed deviously.
Homer sulked.
Plot 3At nursery.
"Hello there little humans. Hello there Maggie... little strumpet..." said the matron heading off somewhere. Once the coast was clear Maggie got up and took out from a dolls house a sack of stuff as the great Escape theme played. She used a blind to pull her up to the air vents and went in them.
She used a Krusty doll and two bottles of milk to reach the Matron's desk in her office. However the Matron was heading there so the babies sent her a coded signal.
Maggie gasped like Lisa and grabbed the keys to the pacifier locker and left the milk bottles as she disappeared into the air vents.
The matron gasped when she found the milk bottles and one fell off her desk and broke.
Maggie reached the locker room and fired a plunger dart gun at the locker and zip lined to it with triumph Great Escape music playing and unlocked the locker and gave everyone their pacifiers back.
The babies cheered and took their pacifiers.
The song drew to a close.
Elsewhere.
Eunice played by Martin's Mom ran out of sandwiches after Stanley and Mitch had bought lunch so the next customer had a Po' boys sandwich. It's what they gave striking workers in the seventies because the people were agreeing with them holding up traffic or stopping production over wages. Thank goodness we had Thatcher the milk stealing witch to crush the unions...
"People have a right to strike..." Lisa sighed.
Not when it inconveniences everyone else...
And there was bigoted descriptions of black people in the play!
"Stop calling me coloured!" Hibbert yelled.
And a black woman wouldn't stop laughing.
"You hush now!" Eunice played by Martin's Mom yelled.
The black woman huffed annoyed. Honey I'd listen, we're still in the times where your kind could get lynched...
Meanwhile Blanche DuBois ended up at the Gates of Elysium. The part of the Greek afterlife only very, very, very nice people and heroes go to! Also if you live three very virtuous lives in a row you can go there.
"Narrator are you high right now?!" Bart winced.
Probably.
...
That evening Homer and the kids went to pick up a Maggie. "Maggie time to- Aaaaaaaaaaghh!" Homer screamed at the sight of hundreds of babies sucking their pacifiers and staring at him.
Homer carefully crept through them until he heard Maggie sucking her pacifier and found her. He took Maggie and backed away out of the nursery creeped out.
"Eeeeeeeeuuuughhhh... babies..." he groaned with dread.
"Yeah they puke and crap themselves... get over it,
Alfred Hitchcock walked a dog past the nursery for some reason...
Maybe he's on a break from unleashing the birds!
They got home after Marge was released from prison for assaulting Ned with a broken bottle after Wiggum learned it was just part of the musical he was in.
"See you Thursday night Marge." said Wiggum as they left his prison.
"Uh huh." said Marge.
They got home to find Oscar had turned it into a shrine to Marlon Brando.
"What the?!" Homer gasped at the posters everywhere.
"I watched every Marlon Brando movie... Yes even Mutiny on the Bounty... You crazy kid! I don't know whether to kill you or kiss you! Stellaaaaaaaaah! The horror. The horror!" Oscar went completely nuts about Marlon Brando.
The Simpsons winced.
"Okaaaayyyy... Marge, I'm going down to the pharmacy to get Oscar some antipsychotic pills..." said Homer.
Then Lisa screamed because there was a monkey man, an alligator in a suit and other godless hybrid man-beast hybrids.
"I have seen the devil in my microscope, and I have chained him!" Oscar ranted.
"Oscar enough! Stop going cuckoo over flippin Marlon Brando!" Bart ranted.
Hugo inside the vents saw all this happening. Cooooool! Man beast hybrid mutants and Dr Moraeu... I have got to see that film... he thought.
"The horror..." said Oscar.
...
At drama school Marge did the bottle scene again.
"You're a dame and I'm a fella!" Ned sang.
"Stanley stop or I'll call Stella!" Marge sang.
"Cut!" Llewellyn Sinclair snapped. "Marge you're supposed to be repulsed by this man. I want to see more passion! More anger!"
"Mr Sinclair please I'm trying!" Marge explained.
"No. do or do not! There is no try!" said Yoda.
Marge grimaced and got back to her role in the scene.
However...
"Marge! Marge... Maaaaaaaaarge!" Homer yelled.
"WHAT?!" Marge screamed at him.
"I just need some change for this vending machine. It swallowed my dollar..." said Homer.
"Here! Take it! Take it all! Now leave my understudies alone you gluttonous buffoon!" Llewellyn Sinclair shouted at him, tossing loose change at Homer.
Homer gathered up the change.
"Well Margey dee diddly, let's go through this scene again shall we?" Ned asked.
"Yes Ned." said Marge.
"You're a Dane and I'm a fella!" Ned sang.
Marge imagines him as Homer.
"Look Marge! Hehehe! I'm stupid Flanders now! Wow I'm ripped!" His belly flops out all fat with obesity. "Ooooooh..." he groaned.
Marge snapped and smashed her bottle. "STANLEY STOP OR I'LL CALL STELLAAAAAAH!" She lunged at him.
"Yes Marge! That's the passion I'm looking for!" said Sinclair. He frowned. "Ned you're supposed to be over powering her!"
"I'm trying!" Ned cried.
"No! Do or do not! There is no try!" said Yoda.
...
The Simpsons hoped Oscar would have calmed down during the cast meeting, he didn't...
"My name is Helen Lovejoy, and I'll be playing Stella." said Helen Lovejoy. "Oh won't someone pleeeeease think of the children!"
"I am Apu Nahasapeemapetilon. I play Steve. Hello please come again!" said Apu.
"My name is "Ot-to!" I'm playing "Pab-lo! And I love Blotto!" said Otto.
Sinclair face palmed.
"Lionel Hutz, attorney-at-law. I'm filing a class-action suit against the director... on behalf of everyone who was cut from the play." said Lionel Hutz. XD! "I also play Mitch."
"I'm Marge Simpson. I'll be playing Blanche. I made some peanut butter brownies for everyone." said Marge with a dish of brownies.
Llewellyn Sinclair tried one. "Well, would anyone else like a bite of banality?"
"I would." said Clancy Wiggum.
"Stanley-" Sinclair asked as Marge was doing a scene with Ned. He had a bloody gauze bandage on his pecs where Marge stabbed him with a broken bottle.
"Yeah?" Ned asked.
"You're pulsing with animal lust!" Sinclair gave him scene directions. Ie how he should be acting.
Oscar dressed as a mad scientist laughed maniacally.
"Marge is that your kid that kept going on about Marlon Freakin Brando through out the cast meeting..." Sinclair sighed.
Marge sighed. "It's complicated..."
...
That night.
"So, what time does this play start?" Homer asked playing his Gameboy.
"Why? Are you going?" Marge said annoyed at him.
"Well, I gotta go, don't I?" said Homer. Pokemon battle music played.
"I'm sure you won't enjoy it. There's nothing about bowling in the play." Marge sighed. "Oh, wait, there is. Probably not much of it."
Homer was engrossed in his Gameboy.
"Why can't you be a little more supportive?" Marge asked.
"'Cause I don't care, okay?" said Homer hurting her. Emotionally. Marge gasped tearful. "I can't fake an interest in this... and I'm an expert at faking an interest in your kooky projects."
"What "kooky projects"?" Marge snapped.
"You know, the painting class... the first aid course, the whole Lamaze thing." said Homer.
"I'm sleeping on the couch tonight..." Marge stormed off downstairs taking a pillow with her.
Basically Homer is a complete dick this episode.
Oscar noticed he was playing Tetris.
"That game was made by communists..."
Homer sighed exasperated.
The attic.
Hugo was experimenting with chemicals or doing one of his kooky projects.
"Those brainless buffoons... those forever foolish, fur-brained fish heads... Fish heads? Mmmmm! Fish heads..." He was now hungry for a bucket of fish heads.
However he dismissed such late night cravings for now and focused on his kooky chemical mixing and tinkering with machines.
...
Drama school.
Lewellyn Sinclair was pacing about harshly criticising his students of their performances.
Marge was thinking over Homer's rude admission that he wasn't the slightest bit interested in the play or any hobby she pursued.
Marge dressed as Vivien Leigh as Queen Cleopatra for some god forsaken reason dropped to the floor and had a hysterical nervous breakdown. Like Vivien Leigh.
Lewellyn was concerned. Although mostly because this was holding up production of his play, not because he actually cared about Marge.
"Oh Sinclair! Mr Sinclair! Where shall I go? What shall I do?" Marge sobbed.
"Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn." said Sinclair.
Oscar winced baffled.
Then someone got the bright idea to remake the original film in the 80s then again in the 90s.
The 90s adaptation has John Goodman as Mitch.
"Oh my god! Sully!" Oscar screamed hysterically and ran off.
Marge was too busy in hysterical mania to notice or care.
Marge felt Sinclair was rather unsympathetic as she dried her tears and composed herself. "Maybe I should've taken a nice calligraphy class."
"Uh, forget about it. That Mr. Takahashi's a lunatic!" said Clancy Wiggum Reading his lines.
Words alone can not describe what I'm thinking of such a scenario. That's just hilarious just on what Clancy said alone!
Home
Meanwhile Homer is being a big jerk and would rather watch TV then watch his wife rehearse or show a vague interest in her hobby.
He was watching the catwalk show from the first act he was watching with the kids.
"It's time to name our five finalists... starting with... Miss Montana. [Applause] A beaut from Butte." Hehehehe! That rhymes! Troy continues, "Miss South Carolina. Nothin' could be finer. Miss Delaware. She, uh- Good for her." God damn it Troy!
[Singing Scales] Marge is singing her scales.
"Marge, keep it down in there!" Homer said rudely.
"Homer, my audition is in half-" Marge protested but Homer turned up the TV volume to drown her out.
"Hey, look, it's last year's winner, Debra Jo Smallwood!" said Troy.
"Eeeeeew! She's hideous!" Bart grimaced in disgust.
"Well whenever men see her they have a small wood... Gahahahaha!" Oscar laughed at his crude joke.
"Oz that's not funny..." Bart sighed.
Marge sighed.
Plot 4Bart's Room.
Bart as a muse was pacing about wearing a beret while Oscar wrote notes on something.
"Okay so we've got... Giant Killer robots, Laser eyed mutant alligator men, Giant radioactive Pierre and Marie Curie..." said Oscar.
"And Full frontal nudity!" said Homer bursting in.
"No Dad! This is our thing!" said Bart.
"Yeah you're not in this ya jerk!" Oscar snapped.
Homer whimpered and left.
"Okay from the top Oz." said Bart.
"Well we've got giant killer robots..." said Oscar.
"Wait scrap the giant killer robots. We've already got giant killer radioactive Pierre and Marie Curie. Instead we'll have jive talking robots." said Bart.
"How about crass talking, alcohol drinking robots?" Oscar asked.
"Um... no." said Bart.
"Bite my shiny metal ass!" Oscar cursed at him.
Marge arrived with a washing basket of Bart's clothes.
"What are you boys up to?" She asked showing interest.
"Writing a play." said Bart.
"That's nice." Marge smiled.
"Someone's got to be polite and show an interest in your play, unlike your jerk of a husband." said Oscar.
Marge gave him a soft look of slight disapproval but nodded.
"Oz. This is a um grownups conversation there's more to it..." said Marge.
"I can't see there is Marge. You've done nothing wrong. It's nice to take up a hobby like drama school or drawing. Your husband is just being plain rude..."
"Oz I can't pretend to like something I don't like!" Homer yelled while fighting with Hugo who must have broke out of the attic when he fed him his fish heads.
"What is there that you don't like about A Street Car Names Desire?! It's got Marlon Friggin' Brando in it!" Oscar ranted. Squeaking slightly from a voice crack.
Bart winced.
"And the bowling." said Teddy, Oscar's living teddy bear creature.
"And the bowling." Oscar stated. "And you can put up a gamely effort!"
Marge cut in. "Thank you Oz but let the grownups handle this please."
Oscar sighed.
"He's right you know!" Marge snapped at Homer.
Homer whined. "Why are you taking his side?!"
"He's absolutely right! You're just being plain rude like a petulant child just because you find a hobby of mine boring! Well I happen to like attending this audition! Even if the teacher is a windbag..." Marge ranted.
...
The Ayn Rand nursery.
Maggie drove her archenemy the Day care centre matron insane so she was escorted out by mental hospital orderlies while jabbering about strained peas.
Inside the babies were sucking pacifiers loudly. Someone somehow was looking after them.
Oscar was there too as a baby. He sucked his shiny blue pacifier.
Maggie performed Great Escape style stunts every day to get the pacifiers back. During one such stunt the Great Escape tune played.
Richard Attenborough was there, probably helping look after the babies.
"Uh..." Bart was baffled as he cut in to make a comment or stop Oscar's madness.
There were also velociraptors.
Bart in a comic book panel reaction gag winced baffled.
And Steve McQueen on a motorcycle.
Bart raised an eyebrow.
And Charles Bronson from the Death Wish films.
"Ay Pal-ey! This ain't over!"
Bart face palmed.
And Donald Pleasance as Blofeld.
Blofeld stroked his fluffy white cat.
Bart groaned and rested on his arms. Exasperated.
Anyway this must happen regularly when Ms. Sinclair isn't around.
Meanwhile Llewellyn and his drama class were sued by Nintendo because one of the songs, called The Kindness of Strangers sounded too much like Bein' Friends, from Earthbound Beginnings/MOTHER.
"Uh Okay..." Marge was confused by this madness now!
"If you think that lawsuit is ridiculous Marge, Peter Puppy from Earthworm Jim is trying to sue the Letter Land books... for naming one of their characters Peter Puppy..." said Oscar exasperated.
Peter Puppy was with the evil lawyers from either Planet Heck (The planet of evil) or the Planet of paperwork and bureaucracy. He wasn't very happy, in fact he was cross with someone.
"Fuzz buddy... I think the Letterland books came first..." Earthworm Jim tried to quietly explain to him.
Peter Puppy, the one from Earthworm Jim, huffed and glared at the book character.
That's not the only ridiculous lawsuit in this episode. Later on the Simpsons manage offend New Orleans!