A/N: Reeeeee, sadness.

Disclaimer: I own only Jocelyn Harford, nothing of Stranger Things. All rights go to the Duffer Brothers, and Netflix.

With Or Without You

Chapter 13

A Deal with God

[Eleven]

It is dark. It is cold. The world is… different, but so much the same.

This place is familiar to me. I have been here before. The water on the ground, the blackness, and yet the people illuminated as if they are standing beneath fluorescent lights. I move through the memories, and the sounds. The world and people are distorted. Their voices are garbled, except…

Her.

I move towards her. Her back is to me. Her hair is long, crimson, and her skin is pale. She is wearing a blue blazer, and jeans. She is smiling and laughing along with a group of others. Mike and Dustin are there. They are sitting around a table, playing… that game Mike loves so much. She is grinning at… Eddie? He is at the head of the table. He's laughing. They share a look. It's warm, and gentle, and safe.

It brings me joy to see it.

I hear a noise behind me, and I turn. I see her again, having dissolved from behind me, to reappear standing with the other members of their group, having just finished their game. They are speaking beside a car, as Eddie walks past them, followed by a pretty girl with a blonde ponytail. They speak.

"You ready?" Jocelyn is smiling, before noticing the girl. "Oh, hey, Chrissy." The girl returns the smile, but a little weakly, as though she is scared.

"Nah," Eddie replies to Jocelyn, "Chrissy's coming to my place for a bit."

Jocelyn's eyes widen a little. She looks almost… sad? "Oh. Okay. Well, have fun." She watches as Chrissy and Eddie leave, her eyes unreadable, her posture somewhat… dejected? Another boy approaches her. A friend?

"Is…. was that Chrissy Cunningham?" He stares after Eddie and Chrissy. Another boy approaches.

"Maybe Eddie's doing a drug deal?" He suggests, shrugging.

"Nah, he's definitely going to bang her." The first boy replies, grinning toothily at the second boy.

Jocelyn looks irritated. "You guys are animals." Her voice is like the crack of a whip.

"But you love us." The first boy grins at her now.

She pretends to think for a second. "Mmmm, more like tolerate."

The first boy now eyes Jocelyn, a coy look on his face. "So… Joce… seeing as Eddie and Chrissy are… you say you and I…" He trails off, wiggling his eyebrows at Jocelyn.

She scowls at him. "Not with a thousand condoms, Gareth." What are "condoms"?

Gareth's grin widens, "So there is a number." Jocelyn moves to smack him, and he dodges, cackling.

The second boy speaks now. "We're gonna go jam for a bit. You wanna come, Joce?"

Jocelyn glances at him, her expression strained. "Uh, no thanks. I'm just gonna head home. I'll see you guys later." She turns to leave, and the scene dissolves once more.

I can now see Jocelyn standing beside a bed, presumably her own. She is picking up her phone as it rings shrilly into the darkness. "Hello?"

"Joce! It's Dustin." I can hear Dustin's voice coming through the speaker, and I smile slightly. It is nice to hear his voice.

Jocelyn looks puzzled. "... hey Dustin. How'd you get this number?"

"No time to explain!" Dustin sounds worried. "Have you seen or heard from Eddie?"

Jocelyn's face immediately changes to one of concern. "No. Not since last night after D&D. Why?" She begins to pace her room.

"Jocelyn, come see this!" Another voice, a man, rings through her room. She looks over to the side, perhaps towards her door?

"Coming, Dad" She calls, before returning her attention back to the phone. "Hey, Dustin, I gotta go. I'll talk to you later." She hangs up before he can reply. She exits to the side again, and the scene dissolves once more. She is now standing beside a man with equally red hair, staring down at a television set. There is an image of a trailer on it. Police cars. Yellow tape.

"Isn't that the trailer park Eddie lives in with his uncle?" Her papa asks her. He looks nervous.

Jocelyn looks as if she isn't listening. "I… I don't know." She swallows, and her fear is apparent. "Dad, listen, I gotta go. I'll be back." She turns to run, and the scene changes once more.

"Dustin!"

"Joce!"

Jocelyn has come running into what looks like a… store for tapes? Dustin, Max, Robin, and Steve are all standing around. They watch her as she runs up. "Did you find Eddie?"

Dustin shakes his head. "Not yet. But we have a hunch."

Everything dissolves again. Everyone is now in an abandoned boat house. It is dark, and there are things strewn everywhere. Steve is busy shoving a big, wooden… thing… into what looks like a tarp. The speech is distorted, and I only catch a few snippets, before…

"Don't worry, guys, Steve will get him with his oar!" Dustin is rolling his eyes, and then –

"AHH, HOLY SHIT!"

Someone erupts from the tarped...oh, it is a boat… and lunges at Steve, pinning him to the wall, a knife to his throat.

It is Eddie.

"Eddie, stop! It's Dustin. These are my friends… You know Robin… and Max… And, look, Joce is here, too…" Dustin is desperately pleading with Eddie. His hands are shaking. Jocelyn slowly steps out from behind Dustin, her eyes filled with tears.

"Eddie…" Her voice is gentle – soft, familiar. Eddie's eyes fill with tears, too.

"Joce…?" His voice sounds small, broken, and scared. He slowly lets go of Steve, and Jocelyn rushes to him, wrapping her arms around him in a hug. He returns it in earnest, his body shaking.

"Oh, thank God." Jocelyn is whispering into his hair. "Are you okay?" She lets go of him, holding him at arm's length, checking him over. Eddie gently pries her hands off of him.

"You guys wouldn't believe me if I told you…" He whispers, terror in his face.

Max speaks now, and my heart breaks as I see her. "Try us."

The scene changes again. This is getting very complicated very quickly.

They are in the boat now, on a lake. It is night time. Steve, Robin, Eddie, Nancy and Jocelyn. I watch as Nancy dives into the water after Steve, and Robin begins to follow. Eddie quickly starts to panic. He tries to stop Robin.

"She's in charge." He points to the spot Nancy had been sitting. Robin scoffs, rolling her eyes at him.

"Are you kidding me? I made that shit up." She then tumbles backwards into the water, amidst Eddie's swearing. As this happens, Jocelyn is slowly climbing to the edge of the boat, too.

Okay, well, either we go into an alternate dimension, or we sit here and get either arrested or shot. I'm gonna go with the former." She begins to get into the water. Eddie moves to stop her, too.

"Joce…" He looks terrified.

She shrugs. "Sorry, dude." She then dives into the water, as Eddie screams after her. Before the scene changes again, I can hear him screaming her name.

"JOCELYN!"

They are exiting the Upside Down now. They are climbing a bedsheet up into the ceiling to return home. They are covered in blood, dirt, and sweat. Eddie gestures for Jocelyn to go next.

"Milady." He grins at her, and she rolls her eyes, before grabbing the sheet.

"Bite me." She says, as she climbs up and through the gate. She lands in a heap on the other side, unhurt.

"You okay, Joce?" Eddie calls up to her, and she gives him a thumbs up.

"Yeah!"

Eddie goes next. He lands on his back, before sitting up, grinning. "That… was fun. Shit." Jocelyn grabs his hand, hauling him to his feet…

Everything dissolves.

"Promise you'll be careful?" Jocelyn and Eddie are standing on the outside of a huge camper van. The others are inside, and Max, Lucas, and Erica are waiting for Jocelyn. Joelyn is looking at Eddie, trying to fight back tears.

"I promise." He replies, before drawing her into a tight hug.

"I still don't see why I can't come with you." She retorts, looking irritated.

Eddie gives her a gentle smile. "Because, it's dangerous. And, because Lucas, Max, and Erica need a chaperone." He grins when she exhales in exasperation.

"Great, so I'm reduced from best friend to babysitter, am I?" She looks hurt, and Eddie softens a little, before placing his hands on her shoulders, looking into her eyes.

"Joce, this isn't up for debate. Just… be safe, okay?" His gaze is tender, but slightly pleading.

Her lower lip begins to tremble a little. "I'm not the one who's going into another dimension, buddy." She forces a smile, but there is pain there.

He looks grim. "I know."

"You better come back." Her voice breaks at this, and he pulls her against him tightly.

As this scene dissolves, they start coming faster and faster – more distorted and jumbled than the last. It is hard for me to keep up.

Dustin is speaking to Joce in the ruined trailer. His face is streaked with tears. "Guys… it's Eddie. He's… He's…"

Jocelyn is screaming. "NO. NO, PLEASE!"

Dissolve.

They are standing in the hallway of a hospital. Jocelyn is on the phone with someone. "Joce. Eddie's alive. Dustin is coming back with him."

"What…?"

Dissolve.

Joce is hugging Eddie tightly as he and Dustin come up the side of a mountain.

Dissolve.

Eddie is drinking Jocelyn's… blood?

Dissolve.

Eddie is screaming as he shakes Jocelyn. She is trapped in Vecna's curse.

Dissolve!

He is drinking her blood again.

DISSOLVE.

They are… oh, they are making love. How… uncomfortable.

DISSOLVE!

They are touching their foreheads together – he is telling her he loves her. She is telling him she loves him.

Eddie is screaming. Jocelyn is dying.

DISSOLVE!

Everything is moving faster now. Colours are streaming past me. Voices. Screaming. Crying. A cold, cruel laugh.

DISSOLVE!

And then…

Everything is still. The world is black again. The fluorescent glow is back on my skin. I am alone.

Or, am I?

I look ahead, and see someone with their back to me. Someone with long, red hair. She is standing still. I slowly approach her. I come to face her. It is Jocelyn. Her eyes are filled with tears. She is looking down at something, and as I follow her gaze, I see it is her own body, being held by Eddie. He is sobbing, whispering to her about their future. Begging her to come back. Slowly, she turns to look at me.

"Am I dead?" She whispers. Her voice is echoey, and her eyes are wide and fearful.

I look down at her body in Eddie's arms. "Yes." I say softly. At this, Jocelyn begins to cry. Her body shakes, and her shoulders heave. She buries her face in her hands.

"I don't want to be dead. I want to live. I want… I can't leave Eddie alone. It isn't fair. It isn't fair!" She sobs, shaking her head. I gently reach for her. Her skin is cold to the touch. Like death. I shiver. She looks at me.

"You're not going." I say softly, and her eyes widen further.

"I'm… not?" She looks so young and small and scared.

I gently take her hand. "No. You're not going."

Jocelyn's face crumples, and she begins to sob anew. As she does, a soft light begins to envelope us. It is warm, and comforting, and safe.

"I'm not going." She whispers, more to herself, than to me. "I'm not going." In the distance, I can hear Eddie's voice calling to her. Begging. Pleading.

She's not going.