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Brood of a New Age

36.

"Nash?"

"Yes, Goliath?"

"I've come to, well-. As you know, it is the duty of a clan leader to lend an ear to all members of the clan and-. "

The seven-foot-tall leader of the Manhattan clan stammered as if he himself were no older than twenty like Nash. This made the youngster smile despite the math book he was poring over. Of course, it only looked as if he would devote himself to the wonderful field of geometry, area and volume calculation of objects. He had just been able to push the Italian textbook (beginner's course) aside when he heard Goliath's typically heavy claws clicking on the stone outside.

Goliath sat down at the desk next to Nashville's. Three stood in a row near the entrance to the library. His father insisted that he study here at least two hours every night. He was allowed to study beyond that in his room, of course, and everywhere else- AS MUCH AS HE WANTED- but there was also a small TV in his room, and his Ghettoblaster, and his GameBoy (The big, gray first model with the sturdy buttons that even held out gargoyle claws - no VR-model). Too much distraction for him. But Goliath stuttering around and seeming kind of uncomfortable with the subject was also a funny distraction, and Nashville turned his chair to face his clan leader. He looked at him intently, enjoying for a few more moments how the adult was trying in a semi-elegant way to get out of this sentence, which he had already started three times and Nash still had no idea what it was about. It was certainly not about the fact that he had already sneaked out of the castle three times, otherwise Goliath would know exactly what to say. And his father would know what to say and how to punish him. But this way he could be sure that it was nothing really bad.

"- A young man, even a young gargoyle man has, well, there comes a time when-"

Nashville shook his head. He liked to make others squirm, he had far too little opportunity for that as a child. But he wasn't THAT cruel that he didn't interrupt now, either.

"Goliath, what's this about? Say it straight out. Am I going to get in trouble?" he asked, and even before his opposite shook his head vigorously, he knew the answer.

"No! Not for anything like that. Never. It's just that I ... and others in the clan have noticed that you've been acting, yes, different the last few nights. And even though I know Brooklyn has noticed, I wanted to talk to you first. I hope ... he won't hold this against me."

"Why should he? You're his clan leader too."

"Well, the question I'd like to ask you, and the conversation that might ensue - that is, the conversation will only ensue if you want it to, I would never force you to entrust yourself to me about this - it's more of a thing between uhh-"

"Father and son?" asked Nashville, frowning. He was still smiling, but he really had no idea what Goliath was getting at.

"Yes. A father and son situation. A strange concept for me. That's the kind of conversation rookery keepers actually have but I didn't know ... if Lexington was right for that. Because you're so close in age and he is … well. Broadway would be more appropriate in that regard but his view is - colored pink by his bond with Angela and I don't consider that appropriate for a conversation like that. And that's why I'm asking directly."

"Please do," Nash said, and though he had gotten a dark premonition during the monologue his jaw dropped open when Goliath, otherwise stoic and sober, romantically involved with Elisa but modest when others were around - actually said it directly.

"If the arrival of Dante and Grace - especially Grace - stirred you up as a young man, I would understand."

"Wait a minute ... Goliath, are you trying to have THAT conversation with me right now?"

"Uhhhh," croaked the most eloquent gargoyle in town, probably in the country, and for a few seconds they just stared at each other.

Nashville didn't know whether to laugh out loud or to deny in horror. But - and the wheels in his head were turning really fast - that would be perfect. If his clan and his parents thought he was acting strangely because of Grace, he could live with that better than if they snooped on him and found out the truth and grounded him for life for disobeying the rules. That's why he stifled a laugh and tried to spin a web of lies and isolated truths like he had never done before. He lied quite a bit since he knew Graziella but she was worth it.

"I know where the eggs come from, Goliath. I was in the same time plane during my parents' last breeding season."

"Of course yes, I just meant-"

- But you're right. The others are right in thinking it's a little bit up to Dante and Grace. Especially Grace. She's really- very beautiful."

Not as beautiful as Graziella might be as an adult if she had been born a gargoyle, Nashville thought, and he felt that heat rising in his face again. He looked up at Goliath and his leader smiled indulgently.

"It's nothing to be ashamed of. Not even for blushing. When I first began to see my rookery sisters and especially the females of the previous clutch in this new light, I was not in complete control of other parts of my body."

When Nash opened his beak to say something about SO MUCH honesty, his clan leader raised both hands. "I mean - those were different times and we males never saw our older sisters as reachable potential mates. A relationship across clutch boundaries is unusual and rare. But I know- we all know that your situation is equally unusual. You don't have any rookery siblings your age. No peers. And that now a unfamiliar unattached female comes along- at reproductive age- that can stimulate a young gargoyle.

Nashville took a deep breath. This conversation was absurd. And SO embarrassing. For him and for Goliath. Still, he was grateful that none of the others had sought this kind of talk with him. Goliath was ... what did they call it? - discreet. And he couldn't think of a better elder for such a conversation. That's why he tried to play along as best he could, rubbing his forearms awkwardly. That he was embarrassed, he didn't even have to play.

"I don't understand ... how Dante never thought of courting Grace before. She smells ... good."

His clan leader rubbed the back of his neck. If Nashville was half as red in the face as he was, they both looked awfully silly.

"Well, the way they told it - and it was pretty straightforward, as evidenced by Dante's rude behavior that first night - they were raised entirely as humans. Their foster father had no idea about gargoyle culture. No one had even heard of gargoyles there, which is probably proof of how good this clan was at laying low."

"Not good enough when a few yokels could have killed the clan along with the other hatchlings."

"Yes. Fearful peasants can be as great a danger to sleeping gargoyles as power-hungry sovereigns. But Dante and Grace escaped with their lives only because this were peasants. With clubs and hammers and crowbars. Otherwise her foster father wouldn't have been able to stop the other humans with his rifle."

"Yeah - that's where they got lucky."

"But because they grew up without Gargoyle culture, Dante always thought of Grace as just his sister. His biological sister. And now that he knows better, even if he is VERY stubborn to process and accept this better knowledge, he still sees her as a sister. He may not be able to interpret her scent. Because he has never noticed how the smell of young females changes to that of adults. And she certainly felt the same way about his smell. And even if they did react to each other at some point ... humans are highly repulsed by the idea of courting and procreating with their own sisters and brothers, and Catholics even more so."

"Man, yeah. Gargoyle Catholics- totally crazy, right?"

"Yes!" confirmed Goliath quietly, making it clear that this was his own opinion that Nashville was not allowed to broadcast under any circumstances, so as not to alienate the new Gargoyles.

As if Nashville would blurt out that kind of talk.

"By all means," the elder said hastily to get back to what he must have thought the issue was.

"I just wanted to tell you that there's nothing ... strange when Grace, as an older well-built female who's not directly part of your clan, appeals to something in you that you didn't know was there before. And when your body - a certain part of your body - responds to her then-.

"Goliath. I'm really-"

"No, it's okay. I - we're just acting out situations. I - I already think it's not the worst strategy for you to withdraw a little bit. You have no idea how many hours I spent alone in the woods as an adolescent gargoyle "hunting" (he raised his hands and made the gargoyle equivalent of goose feet in the air) when the sight of my older sisters or sisters of the same age nearly drove me mad. And do you think the trio was any different? Well, Lexington at least made the effort to bring back a rabbit or two from their excursions but some of the elders, who had forgotten what it was like to be young and full of juice and vigor in that regard, were already wanting to inflict new hunting lessons on Brooklyn and Broadway and their brothers because they thought their adolescent bodies had become too clumsy to catch prey." He laughed at this old memory like Nashville had never heard him laugh before. Not at the top of his lungs but with affectionate exhilarated affection. Then he cleared his throat and was again at pains to be serious.

"So... if you need to retreat, to not make it obvious to everyone how your body is reacting to Grace, that's a tried and true method. And don't keep it inside. If you feel the urge to do it, do it. It's like blowing off steam. It feels good. And then afterwards you can go back to the clan and it'll be easier to be around them."

"Goliath. What-what do you mean by it?"

"It?"

"I'm not supposed to keep IT inside me. I'm supposed to do IT. What do you mean by it?"

The previously upbeat and affirming, even a little proud smile slipped from Goliath's face. Then his eyes grew wide and he slowly shook his head. "Oh, no. You're not ready yet. Have-have I - you haven't had one yet."

"Not one what?"

"I-I'm not supposed to talk to you about it. Not until you get one." He stroked his claws through his mane uncertainly, almost seeming to talk only to himself. "But then it'll be too late if you get one in front of everyone."

Nash put a hand on his knee closest to him. The adult raised his glazed gaze, and it was the first time Nashville must adopt such a serious, stern tone toward an elder.

"Goliath. You pull yourself together now. Tell me. I don't want to be mad with you if you don't tell me now and IT'S happening to me in front of everyone. What's happening to me?" Still he was tremendously embarrassed by everything. But whatever Goliath was talking about was important and Nashville needed to know.

"Your body isn't ready yet."

"No, it probably isn't. But maybe it will be in a few years. Or next year. Or next week. You tell me. It'll be just between us, I swear on my honor as a gargoyle."

Nashville raised his head proudly, feeling very grown up. Even though the following might have come too soon for a boy his age- he needed to know what would happen to his body. And whether it could become dangerous for Graziella - at some point.

Goliath swallowed that Nashville could just hear the lump he was pushing down like that, then he told him.

Nashville was quiet and pensive for a few minutes.

His homework was forgotten and even the fact that Goliath had fished the Italian book out of the pile of books, surely taking it as a further sign of how "attracted" Nashville was to the new busty sister and flipping through it in an effort to occupy himself, didn't really matter to him.

So that had been his talk of flowers and bees. At least in part. Of course he had known how eggs were made. He had been allowed to touch Katana's belly when she had been heavy with egg. He'd known about cycles, mating seasons, smells. And he had known that his dad had made the egg in his mom. How exactly he hadn't known and he hadn't cared THAT much. It was an adult thing. It still was.

He had never thought about his own pecker als an … instrument for egg-making. A penis. That was a boy thing and he had one just like Goliath, his dad, Broadway, Lex and even Bronx had one. And his mom, Angela and Fu Dog were girls and just had girl things- not hanging on the outside but inside. Still, he knew now. Mating - what humans called sex. Eggs and little gargoyles were created by sex. And though the thought of him doing something like that with a partner someday was still a long way off, maybe this other thing wasn't so far off. Masturbation.

That's what Goliath had meant by not keeping IT inside him, and he could do IT. Alone - without a partner. To not scare others- of course, who wouldn't be scared by someone else touching themselves down there? Nashville thought for the first time about the thing between his legs in the context of procreation. That thing would eventually get hard. Mostly it probably happened when a male gargoyle was thinking about a female but it could happen without that. How was he supposed to handle THAT? What if it happened during patrol? What if it happened at the kitchen table in front of everyone? Then he would have to retreat and rub and touch down there. A white fluid would come out of his penis and he would feel much better physically afterwards - that's what Goliath had promised with his head in magenta hue (If it was so natural why was it so uncomfortable for him?). And how was he supposed to do that? He had razor-sharp claws. Goliath had assured he would learn how to do it. Everyone learned and there was no shame in it. Masturbation helped relieve frustration and tension among unmated members of a clan - so it actually had an important function.

He had already bathed, played, and fooled around with his family in the pool in the atrium a few times in the past year. With and without clothes as the others had done just as much with and without clothes. And he had never, ever thought anything funny about it. He wasn't sure if he would ever again be able to splash around with the members of his clan without thinking about... well, without thinking about penises and vaginas and eggs. Especially if Dante and Grace joined their clan and went swimming with them. He had no idea if that was a pleasant thought for the two Italian, Catholic, very humanized gargoyles. After all, Elisa never bathed with them. Maybe she did it with Goliath alone. But ... he understood for the first time WHY boys and girls were different from each other. What these parts were for.

And if humans were built similar to gargoyles ... then Graziella had girl parts too. And not now but maybe in many years an egg would grow inside her. NO! A baby! Damn it, babies grew in human women. Human women got pregnant. He had seen it on TV. Human women had sex and got pregnant. Damn that idea...that his female friend, that sweet little girl would eventually become a woman...that was terrifying. He shook his head and scratched one of his horns thoughtfully. And he felt the corners of his mouth pulled painfully low and heard himself rumbling. Goliath put one of his massive paws on his shoulder.

"Are you okay, Gnash", Goliath asked.

He awoke from his disturbing thoughts.

"Yes. Yes, of course. Everything's okay. Everything fine. Totally ... fine," he shrilled, and then resented himself again but for behaving so dumb.

Goliath leaned back and looked absolutely miserable, even guilty, as if he had personally torn down Nashville's world view. He kind of had ... but he had meant well. Nashville flashed a grin at the blank face of the clan leader.

"Well. You'd rather have fought the Archmage, Demona and The Pack at the same time than have this conversation with me. Am I right about that?" Goliath's gaze became more animated again as he lifted his head and offered the hint of a smile.

"If I could have entrusted this to someone else, I would have taken Oberon on top of it, too."

Nashville burst out laughing like he hadn't in months inside the castle and Goliath's deep thunderous laughter also echoed through the wide library and probably even through the whole wing of the castle. Nashville stood up and where Goliath invitingly but not pushily opened his massive arms it was easy for the child to move into the brief breath taking embrace.

"I know you feel a little unseen in the clan. And that Brooklyn's protective instincts are very much focused on you right now and that's pushing you down a bit. But just remember , you're never alone."

Nash smiled, and for a change it was an honest smile at his leader's warm words.

"Yes. Of course Goliath. Thank you ... for talking with me."

"I didn't just become a clan leader yesterday but this wasn't easy for either of us."

"I'll bet it wasn't. And thank you."

"For what?"

"If my dad had had a talk like that with me ... or any of the others-no matter who, my head would have blown off."

"Then I'm glad. Even if you don't need the knowledge for a few years. ... We're taking Grace and Dante on their first patrols today. I know tonight is one of your patrol nights in the second half of the night. But ... it might take longer. Do you want to be assigned to a group already on the first patrols?"

Nashville mused. It was tempting to go on a long patrol. Maybe even with Dante (with whom there would surely be excitement or at least something to laugh about. Or with Grace, who was a sight for sore eyes). But it was the wrong night for that. Today was Friday. And Goliath had presented him with the best of excuses himself.

That's why he shook his head.

"You said it yourself. I should keep my distance from Grace. Just ... for safety. And you've given me a lot to think about. Tell the others I like to keep to myself today and guard the castle with Fu and Bronx."

Goliath smiled gently and proudly. When he had risen, he briefly pressed his massive knuckles against Nash's brow in a gesture of deep attachment and respect.

"You're growing up so fast. Every job in a clan is an important one. Even if sometimes you have a different impression. I know our home is in good hands with you."

With that, the mighty gargoyle turned away and strode out of the room with his head raised. Nashville expelled the air he had been holding. When he heard no sound other than his own breathing, he rubbed his beak in exasperation. "Geez Goliath. Did you have to do that with your knuckles? Now I feel three times as guilty."

And the prize for the most awkward conversation goes to...

Thanks for reading, Q.T.