I don't own Twilight, the disappointment of my parents though? All mine. Shorter chapter but it decided to go a different way than I planned, hopefully the next one is longer for you guys.

Dreams

Pack link

Thoughts

Chapter 4: Pack

Getting back to the house didn't take us long and I was quick to grab Leah a spare change of my clothes.

"Here, this outta work for now." She took them and nodded before heading to the living room just off from the front door. Within seconds she was back and handed me my shirt, which I shrugged into. A few moments of silence passed, neither of us knowing what to do.

"So, why does being around you feel so...easy?" Leah cringed at herself before rolling her eyes. "Look, I'm hard to get along with at best and at worst I'm being restrained from throttling people. But I don't feel that shit with you, you're a weird werevamp that I met 30 minutes ago and I feel more comfortable with you than my pack that's supposed to be family. Why?" The girl was obviously struggling to express herself and my heart went out to her, after all I was pretty damn emotionally stunted.

"Look, I don't really get all of this myself," I ran my hands over my face and sighed, feeling guilty over the fact that neither of us really had a choice anymore. I was about to drag this girl into a world of bullshit. "But basically every now and again there's wolves that are destined to be pack or some shit. My dad only partially explained it once when I was younger. But we're meant to be family? I've never heard of it happening with shifters though." I shrug and make my way to the living room unceremoniously dropping myself onto Charlie's couch. Leah followed and stood in the archway, arms crossed as she stared me down.

"So...what's that mean. I'm your pack now? What about my brother? I can't just leave him with Sam and his group of pompous ass hats." I could see the minute spams in her arms as she asked, and the twitch of her lips let me know just how opposed to the idea she was.

"Its not that simple, I'm not even officially an alpha yet so technically we're not pack. It's kinda spiritually based I guess. Like we're in tune on some level. I told you I'm not sure the specifics of it, as for your brother without meeting him there's no way to know if he's 'destined' per say like you," I vaguely gesture my hand in the air, "but even if he's not I could still take him from, Sam you said? Anyway it's not something we need to talk about right now. I can't do anything and honestly I don't want to. I'm a shit show, a total fucking mess and I don't need to drag more people down with me. You're fucked in that regard but there's nothing I can do to change it. I'm sorry." My heart felt heavy, the relief from earlier dissipating into nothingness in the face of my new problems.

"Officially you aren't an alpha? What does that mean, aren't you just already one?" I was grateful she breezed past the other stuff, I couldn't say how long that would last but regardless it was appreciated.

"Yes and no. Obviously I am an alpha, you have firsthand experience with it, but not in the sense I could really lead a pack. That's another way we're different from shifters, we have a ceremony that marks someone as a true alpha. And anyone can become one, just like it'd be possible for a born alpha to not become a true one. Without the status as a true alpha I'd be unable to form a mind link with other wolves, which is a dangerous concept when fighting. It's complicated and I don't think anyone has every figured out why there's this difference between werewolves and other shifters. But it's there regardless of if we understand it or not." I ended lamely with a shrug.

"Huh, I guess I should come to terms that none of this shit will ever really make sense, shouldn't I?" Her face had somehow softened and tensed at the same time, probably due to the simultaneous stress and relief of knowing no one, at least not anyone we were ever likely to meet, would or could fully understand supernatural life.

"You'll sure as hell save yourself a headache that way." She sighed loudly before throwing herself down into a recliner across from me.

"So what now?" And fuck if those three words weren't loaded. Cuz what do we do now?

"Well, nothing I guess. There's not a whole lot we can do...I'm sorry." My instincts rebelled at the thought of me being unable to help my pack, my inner beast snarled and demanded I take her from the phony alpha who tried to lay claim on her but realistically I couldn't do anything about it. Yet.

"Until my uncle can find time for the ceremony I don't have the strength to take you or your brother from Sam. And honestly I don't want to be an alpha right now. I- I'm fucked up Leah. I know what I have to do but I just can't do it yet." I felt like a failure. A low growl of frustration leaked from my lips as fear spread through my body. I wasn't fit to be an alpha after everything, but here it was regardless. Sitting in front of me begging that I accept my birthright.

"So that's it? We have this bond and I still have to go back? Back to Sam and his group of thickheaded assholes?" I could hear her teeth grinding as her breathing picked up. "And for what, because you don't fucking want to? That's such bullshit! I'm supposed to just walk away like none of this shit happened? That's what you're fucking telling me right now!" Her teeth were bared and she was panting in anger but I could smell it, feel it through our infantile bond, she was afraid. Afraid of returning somewhere she had never truly belonged and failure and shame crashed through me anew. Because she was right. I was supposed to be her alpha, I was supposed to protect her but all I was doing was running away, all I was good for was running away. So once again, I did.

"I'm so sorry..." And I fled, away from responsibility, away from everything. I barley even registered the door as I smashed through it, didn't care when it hit the ground, I just ran. Like I always did. I ran hoping nothing would ever catch up to me, but in the end I knew that it always would.