Rating: K+

Genres: Non-magical AU, Humor, Romance

Summary: Robin makes a disastrous mistake while pretending to be Regina's beau during a holiday with her estranged family.

A/N: In jest, averbaldumpingground challenged me to write all 20 prompts from a fake dating list. Well, joke's on my friend, I accepted the challenge. I'm doing 500-word ficlets for each, using different fandoms/ships.

6. "You know we're not actually dating, so why did you propose to me in front of my family?" "I'm sorry, I panicked."

DISASTER AVERTED

"What the hell was that?!" Regina hissed once they were far enough away from the cabin.

"I don't know! I panicked, alright?" Robin ran a hand over his face.

This weekend was turning into an unmitigated disaster. A little voice warned him that it would be, but had he heeded it? Of course not. He was an unadulterated fool when it came to Regina Mills, especially when she'd been so earnest and vulnerable, begging a favor from him of all people.

The plan was simple enough: act as her longtime beau during a short holiday with her estranged family. Cora was the viper that Regina warned her mother would be, but it was Zelena who had gotten under his skin. Every word that fell from that abominable woman's lips was either a passive aggressive insult against her sister or a tawdry invitation for him—the latter given in private. Her hand on his thigh during dinner had been the final straw.

He shot out of his seat and toasted Regina. One moment he was revering her best qualities and the next, he was kneeling, asking her to marry him. Her eyes rounded in horror, but she recovered quake, accepting his proposal with a wide, fake grin. He made the debacle even worse by embracing her enthusiastically and kissing her.

Actually, that last bit hadn't been so bad. It was rather glorious, and he wouldn't be opposed to doing it again. And again. And—

"Hello?" Regina snapped her fingers in front of his face.

Right, right. Not the point. He tore his eyes away from her full lips.

"I don't even know how to fix the mess you just made. Have you completely lost your mind?" She threw her hands up in the air with a huff.

He laughed abruptly. Because yes. He'd gone a little mad the first moment she knocked on the door to his flat a little past nine o'clock at night and shoved a copy of the noise ordinance at him with a fetching sneer. He'd opted to finish hanging his pictures the next morning.

"My mother is planning our wedding as we speak." Regina crossed her arms over her chest and glared at him. She was absolutely breathtaking, and he was tired of pretending he didn't notice.

He closed the short distance between them, catching the apprehension that flickered across her beautiful features. "Let her."

Her gaze turned flat. "Robin—"

"Tell her we want a year-long engagement," he spoke over her.

She seemed to consider it. "Then we can call it off after a couple months."

"No."

She stared at him. "No?"

"No break-up." He sucked in a breath and told her the truth. "I want to give this—us—a go."

"You do?" There it was—that fractured vulnerability beneath her biting veneer.

He nodded. Before he could utter another word, she grabbed the lapels of his coat and planted her mouth over his.

He'd laugh if he wasn't too busy deepening the kiss.

~FIN~

A/N: Thank you so much for reading! If you have a moment, I'd love to hear your thoughts!