"Hey Hunt, where am I needed?" Meredith said breathlessly.
"I thought I told them to cancel the page? Anyway it was a false alarm, DOA," he said, signing off on one of the charts he had.
"Alright," Meredith sighed, leaving them to be, going to the nurses station where Webber and April where standing.
"Is there anything interesting today?" Meredith sighed, looking at April then to Richard.
"I have an endoscopy in thirty," Richard spoke up, sounding unenthused.
"I have a ten-year-old who broke his wrist roller blading," April sighed, looking at the chart in her hands. Meredith let her eyes roll a bit as she watched Bailey approach the nurses station, having a heated discussion with Ben about their wedding.
"This discussion is over. Well, I love you too," she sighed before turning her head, "Red panties and a lace bra," she tried to say under her breath.
Meredith looked at April who almost burst into laughter at Richards reaction to the words coming out of her mouth.
"He wants to have a Christmas wedding, in a rustic mountain lodge with red ribbons and mistletoe and a tree with ornaments made out of our photos," she scoffed at the last part.
"Aw, that sounds beautiful!" April exclaimed.
"I think it's a little much," Meredith agreed with Miranda, she was never a fan of big weddings which was the reason her and Derek did the post-it.
"I think it sounds great," Richard said defensively.
"Well I think it's ridiculous. What kind of well-respected man cares this much about a wedding anyhow," she scowled, opening the chart she had sat down as she walked over.
"I did," Richard sounded offended.
"I already had the big wedding, the poofy dress and the ceremony. I'm not going to make all those people sit through another ceremony because what, I'll mean it this time?" Miranda scoffed, closing the chart and placing it with the other post-op charts.
"I remember, I was there with Adele," he said fondly.
April began talking about the type of wedding she wanted to have, with butterflies and fields of flowers.
"I almost had the church wedding, then the Izzie thing happened so we decided to just find another time to get married," Meredith remembered the wedding dresses she tried on, the church they were in, the look on her best friend's face when he saw Izzie walk down the isle.
"Well he put a deposit down on this mountain lodge but he has until the twelfth to get his deposit back and he better to do, that is two days," she rolled her eyes as she took another chart and walked off.
"A man that puts a deposit down is a man who means business!" Richard called after her, she just shook her head and kept walking.
"Wait, today is the tenth?" both Meredith and April said, a nurse then confirmed the date.
"Shit," Meredith muttered, looking over to where April was previously but has now vanished. Meredith furrowed her eyebrows, going to the medical supply closet. She searched through but heard some breathing heavily.
"Hello?" Meredith said and was taken by surprise when she saw what was going on in the back corner of the room. She turned her head, quickly to make sure she didn't see anything.
"Oh my god Mer, we're sorry!" Lexie said, frantically trying to put her scrub top back on her body.
"There are on-call rooms for that!" she quickly grabbed what she was looking for off the shelf, making sure neither of them saw what she grabbed.
"They were all taken, and I have to get back to Callie soon," Mark said defensively.
"I don't care, just make sure I never see that again," she said as she hurried out of the closet and to the closest bathroom. Her heart was racing, she couldn't believe this was happening. She had done this so many times, always it would be the exact opposite of what she ever wanted. The one time she didn't expect anything like this to happen.
Her hands shakily sat down the box, placing the used stick-on top of it. So many things going through her mind as she waited for something she wasn't sure if she wanted it to be positive or negative. If it was negative, she wouldn't be as disappointed as all the times previous, each time she had one of those sticks in her hand was a time her hopes got crushed little by little.
The time came, she looked at her phone as five minutes had passed. She took a deep breath as she picked up the stick, her life seemed to flip upside down in a matter of minutes, whoever knew that two little pink lines could have such a huge impact on her life.
"I'm pregnant," she mumbled to herself in disbelief. She was already on edge, dealing with Madelyn and didn't know how she could handle another baby.
"You'd be good, you'd be a good mom," She heard Alex's voice ring through her brain. He said that right when they first started trying to have a baby, right before she got pregnant with Madelyn. She remembers the little things about them, how Alex always had her back except the Alzheimer's trial which she forgave him for eventually. She remembered how Cristina was such an amazing godmother to Maddie, how this new baby will never get to meet Cristina.
All of her thoughts seemed to fade away when her pager started beeping. She gathered herself, throwing away the home pregnancy test before going to wash her hands, rushing out the door.
"You paged?" She asked, coming into the room. Amber seemed extremely nervous.
"I'm scared," Amber admitted, hugging herself.
"Amber, it's ok to be scared. You are about to have surgery. Is there anything I could do to calm your nerves?" Meredith asked, gently rubbing Amber's shoulder. She shook her head, looking up at Meredith.
"When our parents were fighting, Alex always use to braid my hair and Aaron would play his guitar loud enough so I couldn't hear them, could I have another blanket please?" She asked, her eyes were full of sadness. Meredith felt like she was about to cry, she just nodded and walked out of the room. She put on a smile, hoping the nurses wouldn't see she was about to burst into tears.
"Jacks- sorry, thought you were Jackson," April said as Meredith came into the supply closet.
"You two having a sex date?" she joked, grabbing a blanket off the shelf.
"No, not everything is about sex," April sighed, she looked upset and Meredith turned and looked at her. She could tell something was wrong, she couldn't decide if she wanted to ask or not.
"You ok?" she decided to ask. April sighed, looking at her.
'Yes... No," She shook her head. She looked exactly how Meredith felt.
"April..." Meredith took a step toward April, suddenly feeling worried.
"I had a plan, I was going to be married, I would have a husband. Our wedding would have the mints because we were meant to be," April let out a slight chuckle before continuing.
"We would be committed, I would tell my husband I was pregnant by giving him a t-shirt that said, 'World's Greatest Dad' and now look at me," she was in tears, something Meredith should be doing. She remembered how this baby, this baby she was pregnant with wasn't planned at all.
"You're pregnant?" Meredith asked, she resisted the urge to place her own hand across the undeveloped bump.
"I think so, I don't know," she said, letting out a deep breath.
"Plans never work out like they were supposed to, especially with babies," Meredith felt a smile creep upon her face.
"You try and try to get pregnant, but you can't then when you least expect it, a baby comes along probably because it wasn't planned, plans don't mean anything," Meredith smiled, realizing what she was saying. Maddie wasn't planned and she is like a little miracle, so is the baby she was carrying.
They had tried just after Maddie turned two for another baby, she was ready for one. They tried and tried, every month she peed on that white stick that would always come out negative. When she finally decided to see a doctor about it, they told her it would be a miracle for her to become pregnant again.
"Hey," Jackson said as he stepped into the room.
"I was just leaving," Meredith gave April a friendly smile before leaving the room. She gave her stomach a slight rub, knowing she was going to have to call and get an OB appointment soon. Something gave her a confidence boost; she didn't know what it was, but she had her head held high as she walked back towards Amber's room.
Her phone began to ring, she looked into her pocket. A part of her had a sigh of relief when it was only the daycare as she answered it.
"Hello?" she said in a cheerful voice, one she always used when talking to the people from the daycare.
"Hi Dr. Grey, this is Kate from the daycare," the woman said, her tone matching Meredith's.
"Is there something wrong?" Meredith asked, stopping at the door which lead into Amber's room.
"I know this is not a good time probably but a few minutes ago, Maddie was playing then she started crying and she won't calm down. I was hoping you could come down and see if you could get her to calm down," She said calmly, trying to not worry Meredith.
"Well did she get hurt?" Meredith started to worry; Maddie wasn't one to cry unless she was hurt.
"No, she was playing with the blocks and counting them and separating them like she always does before building them and one of the kids came over and took one of the blocks from her pile and she just started crying," Kate sounded honest.
"Well, I am going to drop something off with a patient then I will be right down," Meredith sighed before hanging up the phone. She had no idea what could have went wrong, she never had any problems like that before.
"Here is the blanket you asked for, made sure to grab the softest one," Meredith had a smile on her face. Even if she was worried about her daughter, she had to stay happy for the patients.
thank you," Amber said as she unfolded the blanket.
"You're welcome, now I have to go down to check on something really quick and have one of the interns come a prep you before we take you back," She gave a friendly smile to Amber before leaving. So many thoughts going through her mind of what could be wrong. She thought that it could be she was tired or maybe the kid did something that caused her to be like that.
As she walked into the daycare, her eyes met with her tiny daughter. She looked so innocent, her eyes red from the tears. She looked like she had calmed down a little bit, but she saw the hurt in her daughter's eyes.
"Hey Maddie," Meredith smiled as she squatted down, getting at her daughter's level. Maddie got up, putting her juice on the table before going to wrap her arms around her mother's neck. Meredith felt a little cry escape Maddie as she held on to her.
"Do you want to tell me what is wrong?" She asked softly, running her hand over her daughter's long hair. She felt her head shake no as she squeezed tighter.
"Do you want to go home?" she asked, and Maddie pulled away slightly, looking at her mother's eyes. Meredith felt her heart break a little inside when she nodded.
"Well how about we go sign you out, you help me finish up on my rounds and help me convince Dr. Bailey to take one of my surgeries?" She watched the little girl's eyes light up as she let a little smile slip.
"Mommy, I don't feel good," she said in her little voice, seeming like she was really hurt.
'What hurts baby girl?" she asked concerned. She pointed to her head right above her eye.
"Did you get hit there?" Meredith examined the spot before she shook her head no.
"I don't feel good," she said with a sniffle before she sneezed into her arm like Meredith taught her.
"I think I know what is," Meredith remembered about this time last year, she would start getting a runny nose and sneezing. Meredith lifted the little girl, sitting her on her hip. Maddie laid her head against her mother's shoulder, her sniffles quieted as Meredith used her free hand to grab Maddie's backpack before signing her out and going straight to the ped's ward.
She cringed walking in, she knew Alex wouldn't be there. She tried her best to avoid the pediatric ward, but she needed to find some allergy medication alright for Maddie.
"Hey Meredith, do you need help with anything?" Arizona smiled, her usual smiley self.
"Um do you think they have like allergy medicine safe for Maddie?" She asked, knowing it had to be somewhere.
"There is probably some in the pharmacy, do you want me to go get you some?" Arizona asked sweetly.
"Please," Meredith offered a smile, going to sit down on one of the chairs at the nurse's station. Maddie snuggled closer to her mother; Meredith knew that Maddie wasn't feeling well.
"You want to tell me how daycare was?" Meredith asked, trying to get her daughter to talk to her.
"I napped den played blocks," Maddie said, pulling her head off Meredith's shoulder. She then started talking about everything she built with the blocks. Meredith listen carefully to her daughter, she saw her eyes looked slightly irritated. She knew that it was only allergies and needed to pick up some medicine while she was getting peppermints.
Arizona came out, a small cup that had a small, purple dissolvable tablet inside.
"Hey Maddie, this is for you to help you feel better," Arizona said holding out the cup that contained the medicine.
"Is it yucky?" She looked at Arizona then back at her mother.
"No, it tastes like grapes," Arizona assured the little girl. Maddie was hesitant at first before taking the tablet in her hand.
"Now put it on your tongue and soon it will be all gone, don't swallow it thought you have to let it melt," Arizona instructed the little girl. Maddie did as she was told, holding it on her tongue until it was dissolved.
"Thank you, Arizona," Meredith smiled, she and Arizona never really had a true friendship, but she was grateful for helping turn Alex's life around. Arizona walked off, as Meredith stood up and put Maddie back on her hip.
"Let's go find Dr. Bailey and you have to help me convince her to do my patient surgery," Meredith said to her daughter, Maddie nodded. They left the peds ward, going on a search for Dr. Bailey, finding her in the attending's lounge.
"Dr. Bailey, I need your help," Meredith started as soon as she walked in.
"Uh-uh, nope. Whatever it is, it's a no," she shook her head, eating the fruit cup as her feet were kicked up.
"Please, Maddie is sick and I need to take her home and I have a choly in half an hour," Meredith plead, setting Maddie down and she walked over to the couch and sat down. She gave Bailey the puppy dog eyes, looking almost exactly like Meredith with the sparkle in her eye.
"Fine, who's the patient?" Bailey said, giving in. She threw away the empty fruit cup and put her lab coat back on.
"Amber Karev, she is supposed to be getting prepped right now for a laparoscopic choly, her chart is at the nurse's station, no allergies and looks like she should handle it perfectly fine," Meredith said, taking off her lab coat and placing it on the coat rack.
"Amber Karev is here?" Miranda said as she swallowed hard.
"Yes, I'll go with you to introduce you guys. She is a really sweet girl," Meredith smiled, taking her regular clothing from a small cubby before going into the bathroom to change quickly. She came out, Bailey was putting her lab coat back on and Maddie was just sitting patiently.
"Come on princess," Meredith said, taking her daughters hand. She guided her and Bailey to Amber's room which had one of the interns getting her peeped for surgery.
"Hi Meredith," Amber said with a nervous smile on her face.
"Amber, this is Dr. Bailey. She was my teacher, and this is my daughter Maddie," Meredith said, lifting the tiny girl up and putting her on her hip.
"Nice to meet both of you, I'm Amber, I am guessing you know my brother," Amber said, hurt on her face.
"Yes, I am so sorry for your loss," Miranda said sincerely.
thanks," Amber smiled awkwardly.
"Mommy, is that Uncle Alec sissy?" Maddie whispered in her mother's ear.
"Yes princess, Amber, I wanted you to meet Bailey because she will be performing your surgery instead of me because this little one decided she wanted to get sick," Meredith smiled at the little girl in her arms. Amber just nodded, Meredith said her goodbye's before leaving and sending a quick text to Derek as she walked down the hall to inform him of the situation.
"What do you got?" Derek said, coming into the room. His sister and Callie both looking through paper's.
"I've been reading up on some radial nerve transfer's," Amelia said, showing him the paper's of research. He grabbed the paper's, looking through the studies. He didn't see the point in all of this, but he had to for Meredith. She wanted this for him, a part of him wanted it also but the chance that it worked was so slight.
"Isn't Mark suppose to be here, helping you both?" He questioned, since this is considered both plastics and orthopedics.
"Mark is taking care of some personal issues to take care of," Amelia informed him.
"He's giving Julia back her stuff," Callie corrected her.
"Ah, so tell me more about this, how are we going to do it?" He questioned, handing the paper's back to Amelia.
"We are going to go in through Lizzie's calf, then take about 1.5-2cm of the nerve, then go to yours to replace the unresponsive nerves with the ones we resected from Lizzie," Amelia said, pulling the representation on the projector.
"Ok 'we' aren't doing anything, Mark and Callie are going to do it," Derek corrected her.
"Yes, we are. Ok anyway Mark will probably be resecting the nerve, then I will replace form the PT to the ECRB," Callie said, watching as Derek just nodded his head.
'Ok, well you guys we can talk more about this tomorrow. I've had a long day and Meredith took Maddie home because she wasn't feeling well and I kind of want to be home before she goes to bed. We will talk more in the morning, Amy are you coming?" Derek asked, watching his sister shake her head.
"I'm going to stick here and do more research. I'll find a way there or maybe just sleep in an on-call room," Amy assured him. She didn't want to go back to the house for him to banter anymore about her problems, she needed to figure out her problems before worrying any more about them.
"Alright, if you need me to come and get you then you know my number," Derek said, earning an eye roll from Amelia. Amelia hated when he tried to big brother her.
"Mommy, why is we going to target?" the little girl asked as Meredith pulled into the parking lot of the Super Target. Meredith hated going shopping but there were things she needed.
"Because I need to pick up a few things and you little miss have to pick something out for dinner and mommy needs to get some vitamins," she said, pulling into the closest parking place. She got out of the car, opening the back door to let Maddie out.
"Why?" she asked as she grabbed her mother's hand. She skipped across the parking lots as Meredith walked a little fast to keep up with the skipping.
"I need something called folic acid, it helps with mommy's tummy aches," she replied as they got to the doors, grabbing one of the shopping carts and helping Maddie get in the cart.
"Oh, can I have mac cheese for dinner? The fishy shaped kind?" she kicked her legs slightly as they hung from the cart, Meredith grabbed the peppermint from the candy isle first.
"We have to make sure they have some first," she smiled as she walked by the kids clothing isle. She saw a pink shirt with writing on it, perfect for what she wanted as she put it into the cart.
"Who is the shirt for?" she looked up curiously at her mother.
"It's for a surprise for daddy," she smiled, thinking about what April said earlier. She knew exactly what she was going to use that shirt for.
"Why is you gettin daddy a pink shirt?" she furrowed her eyebrows, just as he did when he was confused.
"Because it's for a surprise, we got to keep it a secret," Meredith tried to explain to her daughter without telling her, not yet. She placed the shirt in the shopping cart then made her way to the food isle. Maddie kept talking, asking questions. Meredith answered every single one of the silly questions as she reached the children's medicine isle. She collected the medication that helped Maddie the best before getting the prenatal vitamins and the Mac-n-cheese.
"You will not believe the day I had," Derek sighed, coming into his house. He took his coat off along with sitting his briefcase on the bar stool. He was exhausted and just ready to dive right into bed.
"That's great, um me and Maddie had mac-n-chesse for dinner. You can grab some if you want but um first look at the shirt I bought her in the bag on the counter," She pointed out, she was extremely nervous.
"Oh Meredith, guy's don't get all goo-goo over baby clothes," her sighed, going over to the bag.
"Just look at it," she instructed him. Her hands became more restless as he reached his hand toward the bag.
"Hm, what is this," her grabbed the pink shirt out, looking at the writing on it. He didn't know what to think at first, but then it clicked. He felt this relief come over him as he held up the shirt, feeling as if he was going to scream like a little girl, jumping up and down from excitement. He watched Meredith stand up; she had a goofy grin on her face. He knew she was happy about this.
"It's only four weeks," She said cautiously. She was worried but a part of her wanted her to be happy. She was going to have another baby, they were going to have another baby.
"I shouldn't be telling you this, my uterus is still very unstable and anything can happy. Crappy things happen to us all the time which is why I haven't told anyone, I haven't even told Lexie," She kept stuttering as the words left her mouth. In this moment, she wasn't the girl who lost her person and best friend in a plane crash, she wasn't the girl who was constantly making mistakes, she was someone's mother again, for the second time.
"So, if you tell anyone I swear, I will kick you out of this amazing house that you built us," She watched Derek just roll his eyes, walking toward her.
"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone, and good things happen to us," he reached out, caressing her cheek. He was so excited; he was going to be a dad for the second time.
"We're going to have another baby," the smile on his face got wider, he leaned down and kissed Meredith, running one hand through her hair before pulling her into an embrace. She giggled, pulling away as he tried to squeeze tightly.
"We are going to have another baby," She smiled, standing on her tip toes as she leaned in for another kiss. He lifted her up, spinning her around as she let out a burst of giggles. She was happy, truly happy, she never thought this was going to happen again, this was truly their miracle child.