John
My eyes blink themselves open as my mind begins to come back to me, becoming more coherent as I awake in my tent.
Rather than silence, however, I'm greeted to the sound of light snoring.
Slowly, I go to sit up, only to feel a foreign weight around my stomach. Turning my gaze down, I find Shiela latched onto me, snoring softly as her head lays upon my stomach.
Just like that, the memories of the entire day prior come flooding back to me, and I move my eyes to my left, where I spot Rachel, no shoes or socks, jacket removed, sleeping next to me.
I can't help it when I smile. Last night really wasn't a dream. Rachel and Shiela are really here. They actually found me, it wasn't some kind of weird dream I had while spending the night at Hershel's.
"Thank you, God. Thank you." I can't help but to mutter softly, before I glance down at Shiela with a small smile. As much as I don't want to disturb her, I really need to get out of this tent. I know there's gonna be work to be done since we're in a new location, not to mention I want to check on Carl, see if he's doing better.
With an amount of grace I didn't know I had, I unwrap Shiela from around me, watching as she mumbles in her sleep for a moment before she settles back into soft snoring, before I make my way out of the tent, stretching out of habit as I stand to my feet.
From the RV, I can see Dale standing watch, and I look up at him with a smile and give a small wave when he spots me.
"Morning!" Dale calls out with a smile of his own. "You're bright and early!"
"Slept peaceful last night." I respond, smile still on my face. "Figured since I was up, I'd check on Carl, and then see how I can help out today!"
Dale nods his head. "Well, we got word earlier." The volume of his voice lessens slightly as I move closer to the RV. "He'll pull through, we're just waiting on him to wake up."
I nod my head. "That's good." It fills me with so much relief to know the little guy will pull through. He's as tough as his dad. "I'm still gonna go see him, but when I come back out, I'll help however I can."
Dale nods his head in agreement. "Alright. When you're done, though, Shane might have something for you to do. Rick and Shane figure we oughta help out around the farm."
"Works for me." I say before I begin making my way to the house.
As I walk through the field and into the dirt driveway, I see plenty of people, both ours and Hershel's, out and about, doing different tasks like washing clothes, feeding animals, stuff like that.
A few people notice me and give me smiles and waves, which I return as I walk. As I grow closer to the house, I look towards the porch as I hear the door open, where Otis and Jimmy come walking out, toolboxes in hand.
"Hey guys!" I greet with a small wave as I approach. The two glance at me as the walk down the steps, and while Jimmy's expression doesn't change much, nothing more than a nod, Otis gives me a smile.
"And how's the resident Juggernaut?" He asks as he grows closer, to which I chuckle.
"Doing pretty good." I say as I meet them in the middle, coming to a stop as I glance at the toolboxes in their hands. "What are you two up to?"
"Gonna go around the fence, make sure it's still secure." Otis answers, pointing towards the fence around the farm. "Got some plywood in the back of the truck just in case, and I figure I'd best show Jimmy how to do it."
I nod my head, glancing towards the fellow teen. "Never done it before?"
Jimmy shakes his head, switching hands with the toolbox as he speaks. "Hershel figured it best to leave it to Otis before. With this disease going around, they figured it best I go ahead and learn now."
I nod my head. I can understand that. Before, you didn't need many people to check a fence and know how to repair it. But with the way things are, and the fact that Otis is the resident scavenger for the farm, it might be best. "Sounds like a pretty good idea. I'm gonna check on Carl, then see with Shane if I can help out in some way."
Otis nods his head as he moves over to the nearby truck, tossing the toolbox into the bed. "Alrighty then. Let him know we're fixing the fence, he can send you our way."
I let out a chuckle at that. "We'll see, Otis. I'll see you two in a bit."
"See you later, kid." Otis says, and me and Jimmy exchange nods before I move past him as he makes his own way to the truck, walking up the steps and up into the house.
At first, I don't see anyone inside, but then Jenner steps out of Carl's makeshift hospital room.
"Hey, Jenner." I greet him, causing the scientist to turn to look at me.
"John." He nods his head. "Come to check on him?"
I nod my head as I speak. "How's he doing?"
Jenner turns to face towards the room as he steps out next to me. "We got the bullet fragments out and got him stitched up without a problem." He explains as he turns to look it me. "I thought I'd be ill prepared, but I gotta give the man some credit. He's a pretty damn good surgeon for a vet."
At first, I admittedly think veteran, but then I register how Jenner said it, and my eyes fly wide in disbelief.
"A veterinarian?" I can't help but to say in shock. "If Carl's gonna pull through, then yeah, I'd say he is. Both of you are."
Jenner lets a mirthless smile grace his face for a moment, before he turns to look at me. "Dale said I could set up what equipment I'm able too in the RV. When you get a chance, you I can get some blood to study from you?"
I wince at the request, remembering who had to insert the needle last time, but nonetheless, I nod my head in agreement. "If it gets us closer to some kind of cure? It'd be my pleasure." I say with a smile, patting the side of his arm. "For now, I'm gonna check on him, and then I'm gonna see how I can help out around the farm. When you're ready, or when I'm free, come find me."
"No problem." Jenner says, before moving past me and out the door, as I move into the bedroom.
It's no surprise to see that Rick and Lori are still inside with Carl, and their gazes meet my own when I step inside, followed shortly by smiles.
"Hey, John." Rick greets, sounding a little tired as he gives a small wave. "You're up early."
I let out a snort of amusement at those words, smiling as I speak. "Slept pretty good last night. Figured I'd come and see how he's doing." I say as I let my gaze wander over to Carl's still unconscious, but significantly more healthy looking form. "I hear he's gonna pull through."
"Yeah." Lori answers, turning to look at Carl for a moment, before turning her eyes back to me with a smile. "You helped save my boy. I can't thank you enough."
"Sure you can." I joke as I lean against the doorframe. "I get anymore 'thank yous', I'm gonna go crazy." I say as I cross my arms, glancing over to Carl. "Just… take care of him, you'll have returned the favor."
"No problem." Lori responds as she too trains her gaze on Carl. "Otis was just in here to check on him."
"Still pissed at him?" I can't help but to ask, but to my surprise, Lori shakes her head.
"Not anymore. My baby was hurt, and I was angry, but… he did go out to get the supplies to save him." Lori admits as she looks at me. "And he really felt bad about it."
"You should've seen him yesterday." I say with a chuckle. "I'm the Juggernaut, and something tells me the stubborn bastard would've tied himself to just so I'd take him with me."
Both of them chuckle a little at the joke, and Rick looks at me with a questioning glance. "Rachel and Shiela still asleep."
I nod. "Yeah. I figured they deserve some time to get a peaceful sleep. I had to untangle Shiela from me when I woke up."
The two smile at my words, glancing at each other for a moment, before looking back at me.
"She saw you as a teddy bear, huh?" Lori jokes with a small grin. "That's cute."
I let a small smile grace my features at her words, and turn my gaze back to Carl for a moment, before standing up off the door frame as I glance at the two once more. "Well, I'm gonna head outside, see how I can help out." I say as I pat the door frame out of habit. "Let me know when he wakes up, alright?"
"No problem, John." Rick says with a smile. "Thanks for stopping in."
"Gladly." I say before I turn around and make my way out of the house once more.
Now that I know Carl's gonna be okay, seen him for myself, I feel some relief fill me as I relax a little more. I don't have to worry about him for the moment, and with Rachel and Shiela sleeping, I have nothing better to do.
May as well go ahead and see Shane.
It doesn't take much to find him, as he's fairly easy to distinguish from everyone else with his hair, and he's standing over by the RV.
As I close the distance from the house to the RV, I see better that he's standing next to the picnic table by the RV, and as I get closer, I can see him sorting through the bag of guns.
"Hey, Shane." I greet him, causing his eyes to snap towards me. When they do, he turns his full attention to me and he grins.
"How you doing, bud?" He asks as he stops whatever task he had set out for himself to speak with me.
"Not much." I say with a small smile of my own, letting my gaze wander over the farm where others are doing different chores. "Figured I'd stop over and see if I can help in any way." I admit as I turn to look at him once more.
Shane raises an eyebrow in response, and chuckles. "Just woke up, and you're already trying to help out." He comments as he shakes his head in amusement. "Well, I just sent Dale over to help T get some water. I know it's probably not what you had in mind, but you could probably bring a whole bunch at once." He says with an amused grin of his, causing me to let out a small laugh.
"Hey, if it helps it helps." I say with one last glance before turning away and making my way towards the spigot next to the well, where I can already see T-Dog and Dale hauling a few jugs over in a wheel barrel. When I get close enough, I call out to them. "Dale, T!"
They glance towards me when they hear my voice, and they both smile a little as I approach.
"Look who it is, the lost puppy." T-Dog jokes at my expense, causing me to chuckle in response.
"Yeah, that's me." I admit as I look at him. "Shane told me to come help you load up some water." I say as I come to a stop next to them, looking between them. "Said I could probably carry a lot more at once."
"Well, we'll take the help." Dale says with a smile as he waves me over.
I begin to move over to help them, however, my eyes wonder over to the well, and my brow furrows in confusion when I notice that the board over the well had a hole in it, like something fell through.
"Hey, uh, guys?" I call to them, getting their attention as I keep my eyes on the well. "How long has that well been like that?" I say, pointing to the wooden covering as I turn to look at them.
The two look at the well, and their own brows furrow in confusion, before T-Dog shrugs.
"Maybe it's like that for when it rains?" He suggests, shrugging his shoulders. However, I'm not so sure.
"Would make it easier for water to get into it." Dale agrees, but considering the fact that the covering seems to have cracks built into it for rainwater, I'm not so sure I agree with that assessment.
Weary, I begin approaching the well, and already, my heart begins to drop as I begin to hear sounds coming from the bottom. The problem?
It doesn't like anything alive.
I move until I'm standing over the well, and I lean over onto my knees to peer down the hole.
And my stomach drops, in both horror and a little bit of disgust.
Down at the bottom of the well, in the water, is a walker, and it's been down for a while. The damn thing is bloated all to hell, it's fuckings are as thick a sausage, and it's I can see it's eyes are damn near filled with water as well, practically popping out of the sockets as it claws at the walls, as if trying to get out. Hell, the damn thing's skin looks like rubber.
And I can't help but to curse.
"God dammit!" I growl as I stand back to my feet, shaking my head in frustration as I turn to look at Dale and T-Dog. "You may as well stop before you even start!" I say as I lean down and grip the edge of the covering, flinging it off with a grunt of annoyance, allowing me to peer down into the well easier.
"Why?" T-Dog asks, confusion on his face as well as Dale's, as the two of them immediately drop the jugs and buckets they were getting ready to fill and make there way over to see for themselves.
"Take a look." I respond, pointing down into the well.
The two do just that, and when they do so, their eyes widen in disbelief as they see the zombie currently resting within the bottom of the well.
"Oh shit." T-Dog says, taking a few steps back and rubbing the back of his head in disbelief as Dale continues to look on.
"Well, that's wonderful." Dale says, lips tightening in frustration as he stands up and puts his hands on his hips, turning to look at me. "Can you get him out?"
I nod my head in response. "Probably, assuming the damn thing don't burst when I grab him." I say as I peer back down into the water. "Problem is, he's so flooded he's floating, and I don't know deep the well goes."
"Couldn't you latch onto the sides?" T-Dog proposes, which, I admit, it is a valid option. But I'm still a little weary over that.
"I wouldn't get one arm around anywhere but his neck, and if I squeeze too hard…" I trail off, but the two get the point I'm trying to make.
"Pop goes the weasel." Dale finishes with a sigh. "Do you think his neck could take the weight?"
I nod my head once more. "Probably, but I want to get a second opinion before I even try. That's his weight, plus all water he's sucked up that's pulling on his neck." I say as I run a hand through my hair in frustration. The last thing I want to do is climb to the bottom of a fucking well, but if I got too, I will.
"I'll go get the others, see how they want to handle this." T-Dog says, moving away from the well and towards Shane, leaving me and Dale alone.
"I hope the water's not contaminated." Dale can't help but to say, and I agree.
Something tells me that drinking the water isn't gonna make us turn like the bites would, but the problem is, it's not a person, it's a walker. And corpses tend to begin rotting, which means I can only imagine what kind shit that thing inside of it.
This… is not gonna be pleasant.
Shane
You have got to be fucking kidding me.
Everything started to look up for a bit. John, Rachel, and Shiela's reunion, Carl's gonna pull through, we have a safe place to stay… and now there's a fucking walker in the well.
Just great.
T-Dog gathered up everyone, from me, to Lori, Andrea, Amy, Glenn, Jim, Maggie, Jimmy, Otis… all of us are coming to see the damage.
T leads us up to the well, where John and Dale are still waiting, and we all gather around the well, Dale taking out a flashlight to shine down into it, and wouldn't you know it?
He's a big fucker, I'll say that much.
"We got us a swimmer." Dale remarks as he peers down into the well with the flashlight.
"Jesus, I thought I was big." Otis remarks with wide-eyes, glancing down into the well.
"How long do you think it's been down there?" Glenn asks, face scrunched in disgust at the site.
"Long enough to grow gills." Andrea remarks with disgust of her own.
"And gain some weight." Jim mutters with a slight scowl.
"We can't leave it in there." Lori says with a shake of her head. "God only knows what it's doing to the water."
Amy turns her gaze to John. "Can you get him out, John?"
John nods his head, turning to meet her gaze. "Should be able too, assuming I don't pop him open on accident." He responds, turning his gaze to me. "You think his neck would be able to take the weight?"
I suck some air in past my teeth as I look down at the walker. As bloated as it is, that's a lot more weight than normal tugging at a neck. "Is there a safer option?"
John looks back down into the well, brow furrowed, lips tightened, a look on his face. "Maybe." He says, turning his gaze back up to me as he stands up straight, putting a hand on his hip. "I could get down there and just throw it out."
"How is that safer?" Andrea asks, raising an eyebrow as she looks at John.
"Cause as long you back away, I can throw it up high enough for it to splatter when it hits the ground." He answers as he turns to look at me. "One helluva mess to clean up, but risk of a bite."
I look back down into the well, weighing the pros and cons of each. On the one hand, I do think it can take the weight if John's gonna do what I think, and then we put it down quick and easy. Problem is, if I'm wrong, then we'll have to seal off the well.
I don't feel like cleaning up walker guts… but if it would be the safer bet.-
"Whoa, just pull him out." Maggie says, catching our attention with a stern gaze directed at us. "Daddy's not gonna be happy if we just splatter him all over the field."
At that, we all turn to look at each other, because she's got a point.
"Hershel would have a fit." Otis says, nodding his head in agreement with Maggie. "He'd seal off the well then have to clean up its remains.
"And I really don't feel like cleaning up guts." Jimmy visibly shudders at the thought, to which Amy nods in agreement.
"I don't either." She says.
The rest of us all look at each other for a moment, before all eyes turn to John, who lets out a sigh.
"Well, shit." He says as he almost immediately get down and begins climbing down into the well. We all watch as he lowers himself down, peering over once he's below ground level and watching.
John sinks his fingers into the stone sides, making his own grips as he climbs lower, bracing his feet against the wall as he does so, and we all watch in anticipation and apprehension.
John pauses for a moment when he's halfway down, letting one hand fall away and easily holding on with the other alone as he looks down at the walker, before turning his gaze up at us.
"If I break its neck, would that make things a little safer?"
As much as I'd like that, that only increases the risk.
"Nah." I say as I shake my head with a sigh. "Cause then, the only thing supporting that weight is rotted, bloated skin and muscle."
John's head drops in disappointment, before he lets out a sigh and shakes his frustration as we all hear him begin to mumble.
"Goddamn fat fucker, making climb down a fucking well…" We can all practically hear him growling it, and we can't help but to look at each other for a moment.
"Was this a bad idea?" Glenn asks.
"Probably." Jim answers in a deadpan tone.
"Quit grabbing at me!" John suddenly shouts out in irritation, and almost immediately, his words are followed my the sound of cracking bones, and we look down to see the walker now stumbling, most of it's jaw broken as John continues to lower himself deeper. "You owe me for this one, assholes!"
Despite the situation, I can't help but to chuckle as I look at the others gathered around the well. "He's fine."
Finally, John is low enough that he's hip deep in the water, and his arm flashes out almost like lightning, wrapping around the neck of the walker and tugging close at it begins to snarl and claw at his arm.
"Yeah, yeah, keep clawing, see where it gets you." John mutters at he begins scaling back up the wall, using one hand as he does so, meaning his pace is much slower than before, and we can see water practically pouring off the walker as it's brought up out of the pool of liquid below
It takes way too long for my liking as John makes his way up the well's wall, but he stops suddenly when he reaches the top, turning to look at us.
"Get a knife or something and kill this thing." He instructs, the look of agitation on his face leaving no room for debate. "It don't matter how strong I am, I try to get it up myself and I run the risk of busting it open."
He doesn't need to say anything else beyond that, and to my surprise, Jim is the first one to act, pulling out a massive pocket knife I didn't even know he had and driving into the walker's skull, causing it to slump, before pulling it out and sheathing it wherever he had it.
"Shane, Otis, Jim, T-Dog." John says, getting our attention. "Get it under the shoulders and help me haul it up out of here."
We make no objects, and the others move out of the way as the four of us do as John says, me and Otis moving to get the left side and Jim and T move to the right, and John helps us hual it out of the well, which I'm thankful for. Each time he let the sumbitch go for a second to get a better grip and haul it up further, it felt like the damn thing gained a thousand pounds.
Finally, it's up out of the water, and only then does John climb out of the well completely, dusting himself off a little and looking down at his currently soaked pants and boots.
With the deed done, it seems John's back to his typical self, as he turns to me with a joking grin and points a finger at me. "I meant what I said, you assholes owe me for this one." He waves his finger and moves his gaze on all of us, causing chuckles of amusement to rang out.
"And we will be sure to return the favor." Otis says with a chuckle as he looks at the teen before his face falls slightly as he looks back down into the well. "Now, how do we know the water wasn't contaminated?"
At that, the positive mood that lasted for only a second drops as we all look back down the well.
"We don't." Jim says, rubbing his head in frustration. "Only way to know for sure is to drink some, see if anyone gets sick."
"Or," John speaks up, catching our attention once more. "We could have Rachel boil it once she wakes up."
At that, most of ours go wide, both in disbelief and at the feeling of stupidity.
We have a literal human flamethrower in our group now, and none of us thought of that?
"Can she do it safely?" Lori asks, to which John nods.
"All she's gotta do is stick a hand or a foot in, and she can bring it to a boil in an instant. After that, it's just waiting for the water to cool again." John explains as he cracks his neck out of what I'm assuming is habit. "Hell, I've seen her evaporate larger bodies of water in seconds. This? This is nothing."
We all look at each other for a moment, before peering back down in the well one last time, before I nod my head. "Seems like the best option." I say as I look up at him. "You know how long she'll be asleep for?"
At that, John smiles a little. "Your guess is as good as mine, but I'd rather let her sleep. Probably the first peaceful night she's had."
I don't show it outwardly, but I agree, and I can see everyone who's not from the farm does as well. Rachel was thrashing and mumbling, damn near screaming as she slept the night before last. If last night was a peaceful sleep, she can sleep well into the afternoon for all I care.
"Well then… for now, why don't you and T go and help Otis and Jimmy with the fence." I propose, looking at John and glancing at T-Dog.
The both of them nod in agreement, to which Otis smiles.
"Appreciate the help, boys."
"No problem."
"Gotta play our part, man."
"And Dale," I say, catching the older man's attention. "Why don't go on watch duty again for a bit? Ain't got nothing else to do that's not being done."
Dale nods his head in agreement. "After that?" He says, pointing to the walker corpse. "Sounds like we need a look out."
"Alright then, back to it everyone." I say, and the group mostly disperses, returning to their original or now assigned activities. However, it doesn't escape my attention that Maggie stays behind. I turn my gaze to her, and find her looking down at the walker corpse with an expression of sadness. "Something wrong?"
"Did we have to kill him?" She asks, catching me off-guard with the question.
"Of course we did." I can't help but to say, raising an eyebrow. "Whoever it was before is gone. It was just a walker now. Safer for everybody."
Maggie doesn't say anything else, simply staring at the walker for a moment, before letting out a sad sigh and shaking her head, marching off in the direction of the house.
What was that about?
Rachel
For the first time since all of this started, I've finally had a peaceful nights sleep. No nightmares to haunt me, no visions of my friends and family condemning me… no image of John trying to kill me.
Instead, it's a peaceful oblivion, and when I wake up, it's to the sounds of chirping birds and activity around the farm if I hear it right.
Slowly, I sit up, rubbing my eyes a little as I clap my lips together in order to salivate my dry mouth. My eyes wander to my right, where I can see Shiela sleeping on the other side of the tent, and an empty space where I'm pretty sure John went to- John!
Suddenly, the memories of the night prior rush to me, just like that, and I realize that last night wasn't a dream, a fantasy conjured by my own hopeful mind. We've really found John.
I decide to let Shiela sleep, considering she hasn't had a peaceful place to sleep in almost as long as me, and I immediately look around for my boots, finding them nearby. I decide to forego my jacket completely, and after frantically putting on my boots, frantic enough that I manage to miss the boot entirely twice before I calm down a little, I climb my way out of the tent, stretching a little as I look around.
I can see most of the group helping out around the farm, and I'm assuming Jenner is either with Carl or in the RV. Rick and Lori are probably still inside with Carl, and I'm hoping we have some good news about his condition.
As I remember Carl's condition, I can't help but to feel a little guilty at the fact that my excitement to see John once again made me forget about the poor boy's condition.
I see John over by the picnic table under the tree, standing next to Shane, and they seem to be conversing about something. The moment my eyes lock onto John, I can't help the smile that worms it's way onto my face as I make my way over to them.
I give Dale, who's standing watch atop the RV, a quick wave as I go by. He returns it, but he doesn't say anything, though I have a feeling why if the smile on his face is any indication.
The two of them notice me as I approach, and they seem to pause their conversation as they turn to smile in my direction.
"Well, good morning, sleeping beauty." John says with a small grin as he puts his hands on his hips.
I can't help the smile that worms its way onto my face as he speaks, and I find myself slipping back into old habits I thought I lost.
"Well, someone's gotta be the beauty." I say with a small grin as I come to a stop in front of them. "And it's not gonna be you, you snore like a grizzly."
Shane chuckles in amusement as John merely grins at my words, before it turns into a happy smile.
"It's good to see you again, Rach." He says, using that nickname that I haven't heard in so long. He's the only one to ever give me that nickname, and he's the only one who ever used it, and I'm not ashamed to admit that it makes my heart flutter every time I hear it.
"You too." I say as he moves over and wraps an arm around me shoulders, pulling me into a side hug as I turn to look up at him.
That amused grin… I've wished to see it again for so long, and I have to turn my gaze away in order to not start blushing on the spot.
Goddamn you, hidden crush!
"Glad to see you awake." Shane says with a smile. "We've got a job for you, if you're up for it."
I turn to look at Shane as I feel John pull away from the hug, and I internally whine, but I show nothing on the outside. Instead, I look at Shane at I move some of my hair out of my face and tuck it behind my ears.
"What's up?" I ask, referring to the job he'd mentioned.
"Well, Hershel has a well on the farm, right?" Shane starts, pointing over to the well he's speaking about, causing me to glance over towards it. "Well, John here found a walker in it."
At that, my eyes widen as I turn my gaze to Shane in disbelief. "You're kidding, right?"
"No, he's not." John says with a shake of his head, causing me to turn to look at him. "It had to have been down there for a while. Fucking thing was bloated all to hell."
"Me, T, Otis, and Jim had to kill the thing once he got it out and help him haul it out just to be sure it wouldn't burst." Shane speaks up once more. "But we ain't sure if the water is contaminated, and the only way to be safe-"
"Would be to boil it." I finish the thought, turning to look back at John. "You're gonna lower me down there so I can boil it, aren't you?"
John nods his head, looking at me with a small grin. "I've seen you evaporate lakes. I think you can handle this." He says, his confidence in me is something that I welcome, even if I know as well as he does that I can do it.
I shrug my shoulders in response, and turn to look at Shane. "Might have to give it a few hours to cool off." I warn him, to which he nods his head.
"John said it might take a bit of time like that." Shane says, nodding towards John as he does so. "Once you're done though, you oughta go check on Carl, both of you."
"Is he doing better?" I can't help but to ask the moment the boy is mentioned, to which Shane nods, grinning a little as he does so.
"He's gonna pull through." Shane assures me, before glancing towards John. "Rick was out and about for a bit, talking with Hershel while you were checking the fence with Jimmy and Otis." He says to John. "He's asking about you. He already saw Sophia."
At that, John smiles a little, and nods his head. "I'm glad to hear that." He says, before turning to look at me. "What do you say we get this done so we can so go see him?"
"Gladly." I say. I'm more than eager to see Carl doing better, because seeing him in the bed last night when we first arrived… It was heart wrenching. Especially since until John and Otis got back, he was literally just inching his way towards death.
John nods his head, before he waves me along as he begins walking in the direction of the well. I move to follow, leaving Shane with a small wave as my feet carry me next to him.
Now that I think about it, this is the first time me and him have actually been alone together. No group, no Shane, no Shiela, just me and him.
"So…" I speak, hoping to start up some sort of conversation. "How are you holding up?"
John glances over to me without breaking his stride, and his face falls a little as he realizes what I mean by the question, and he lets out a sigh. "I ain't really processed it, you know?" He admits with a shake of his head. "Pete's dead, Maddie and Levi are missing, the base, the militia, it's all gone… and I don't even wanna try to ask Shiela what happened to Mamaw, Papaw, and James." He admits before he glances over at me. "I… is it true? Are they dead?"
I can't help the way my own face falls, but I nod my head. I can't lie to him. "Bryan was bitten on the way, and he turned at the shelter from what Peter said. He killed Debbie, and James got bit saving Shiela."
"The phone call." John recalls with a somber tone. "All this time, I took it as confirmation that she was gone." He admits, before a mirthless chuckle escapes him. "And it turns out, she's the only one left."
I'm not sure what to say, how to comfort John, as much as I wish I did. But I can damn well try.
I let a hand come up and rest upon his shoulder as we walk, causing him to slow his stride to a stop as he turns to look at me.
"I know you wish it was different." I say, looking up at him, an expression of sadness on my own face as I speak. "That we were all together, safe at the base. But I know all of them would be proud of you."
John stares at me for a moment, before his head droops as his eyes meet the ground, before he looks back up at me, lips tightened, nostrils flared, like he's trying not to cry.
"I didn't even get to say goodbye." His voice quivers as he says it, barely a whisper, and my heart shatters at hearing this normally confident guy so broken. Someone who's always been so confident, and he's completely destroyed by the news.
"John…" I can't help but to mumble softly, and I let my arms come up in a comforting hug around his neck, and he lets me tug him down until his head is on my shoulder. "Don't bottle this up. Please." I know exactly what this will do to him.
When all of John's emotions finally explode, he'll more than likely do something he'll regret, and there's likely nothing I can do to stop it.
But I can be John's friend, like I always was. Someone to talk to, someone to be there for him when he felt like he had no one else.
Someone who can understand his pain.
John shudders in my grip, before I feel his head adjust slightly. I feel his nose poking at my shoulder, and his body begins jerking as quiet sobs escape him.
"It's okay, John." I say, running a hand across his back in soothing, comforting motions as John let's his agony spill for anyone who looks in our direction to see, but I don't care. And neither does he.
His hands come up and wrap around me, pulling me into a firm, needy hug, the kind of hug that comes from someone desperate for closure, for comfort, for somebody to just… cry on.
John's been that person for me more times than I'm proud to admit, and I will gladly be that person for him in return.
"It's eaten at me every day…" John whispers between sobs, tugging me closer, although he probably doesn't realize it. "I tried to kill myself back in Atlanta… and I can only imagine how disappointed they'd be…"
"But you didn't." I say to him, because I know more than anything that despite that hiccup (One of which I'm not sure I want to hear about), Bryan, Debbie, and James would all be proud of him. For the good he's done, the way he's tried to help.
Because I know that there's nothing in this man that can resist a cry for help, no matter how rude or uncaring he can come off at times.
"John, if there's one thing I know, every single one of them would be proud of you." I assure him, smiling slightly even though he can't see it. "All of them. Not just Bryan and Debbie, or James… but Peter, Maddie, Levi… even Alex."
"The last thing I said to Maddie was that I'd be back for her." John whimpers, causing my heart to shatter even more, my smile fading quickly. Now I know it's not just the news about his family that has him like this. "I told her that I'd be back, that everything would be alright." His voice hiccups slightly from his sobbing. "And now she could be anywhere out there, or hell, she could be dead for all I know."
"Maddie wouldn't want you beating yourself up like this." And I know that for a fact. Maddie was my best friend, and I can say for certain that dead or alive, she wouldn't want John hating himself for something he never could've predicted. "She couldn't hate. She coudn't if she tried."
Not after John was nearly killed trying to defend her, and everyone else at school.
Jason manipulated Maddie, and John saved her life. And then Jack nearly killed John by flooding his lungs with water when he and Tibe came to save Jason.
I still remember the hateful words, the absolute fury that disguised utter anguish, when we brought John back to the base. Levi tried to calm her down, but Maddie took out her feelings on me and Peter, and I'll never forget how broken she looked when we got John in the medical bay.
John would never know, but Maddie admitted that despite what he'd done, the time in which she hated John, the moment she told him she wanted nothing to do with him, would remain one of her biggest regrets.
She couldn't hate him if he beat her half to death.
Okay, exaggeration, and I digress.
"I miss her so much." John admits, whimpering in my grip. My eyes wander behind him, and I notice Shane approaching us, a look of concern on his face. His eyes meet mine, and I shake my head. A silent plea.
Shane stops for a moment, before he nods his head in affirmation.
"I'm not gonna say that they can be replaced." I say, pushing John up a little so that I can see his face. "I know nothing can do that. But that doesn't mean you don't have family, or loved ones." His face is stained with tears, and they're still running. If he were a normal person, he face would be red with tear stains. "You've got me and Shiela still. And you've got everyone in the group. Shane, Rick, Dale… Sophia looks at you like an older brother, I'm sure of that."
John looks at me and swallows slightly, and I let a smile come onto my face once more, comforting, reassuring, as I bring a hand up to touch his face out of instinct.
"You're not alone, John. You don't have to be, and you never will be again if I can help it."
John looks at me for a moment, before finally, a smile comes onto his face, and he sniffs a little as he speaks. "Thanks, Rachel." He says, and his hand comes up to grip the one I have upon his face.
Seeing that I've got it handled, Shane decides to make his presence know, moving closer from the spot he'd been rooted too, causing John to let go of my hand and turn to look at the man.
"You alright, John?" He asks, genuine concern in his features as he looks at him, and it's there, that I notice something.
In however long they've known each other, Shane's become attached to John. He doesn't just see him as a superhuman, or as the Juggernaut, or as someone who's just a part of the group. Shane genuinely cares for John's wellbeing, and it shows, whether either of them realize or not.
John brings a hand up to wipe his tears as I let my hands fall from his form, and he gives Shane a small smile, sniffling a little before speaking. "Yeah. Just… needed to get it out, I guess."
Shane looks at John for a moment, before he slowly nods his head. "Alright. Just… take care of yourself, okay?"
John nods his head in response to the request. "Sure, Shane."
Shane stays there for a few moments longer, before he nods his head, a small smile gracing his features. "Just so you know… she's right." He says, catching us both by surprise. "The way things are now… the way I see it, everyone in the group is part of the family."
And with those words, he turns away and makes his way back over to the picnic table, leaving me and John alone once more. Me and John watch him leave, before John turns his gaze to me.
"I missed you, Rachel." He says with a smile, unknowingly making my heart skip a beat at his words. "I'm glad you're here."
I honestly can't help the blush on my face this time, and I have to resist the urge to avert my gaze, because that would make it so much more embarrassing. Instead, I opt to to give him a smile. "I'm glad I'm here too."
Just like that, John knows how to create butterflies in my stomach and make me weak in the knees without even realizing it. Instead, he just gives an amused chuckle, and gestures over to the well.
"Alright, let's get this done." He says with a small grin. "We got a boy to go visit."
"Yes sir." I say in a joking manner, causing John to roll his eyes in amusement as we move closer to the well.
"I'm not gonna escape that, am I?" He says as I begin to remove my socks and shoes, so that I only have to stick a foot in the water when we get down to the well.
"Nope." I say as I stand barefoot, only to have John pick me up by the waist. "You were our leader, John. Whether you realize it or not."
John simply chuckles in response as he begins to climb down into the well. "If you say so."
When John gets us down to the bottom of the well, it's as simple as sticking my foot in and igniting it, though not before rolling up my pants leg so that I neither soak nor burn it, and the water is boiling in seconds. "That should be good." I say, turning to look at him with a grin.
John simply shakes his head, snorting in amusement as he begins scaling the well wall once more. "Alright. Let's go."
I can't help the smile that sticks to my face as he hugs me close. I may not be able to have John as a partner…
… but being his friend is just fine with me.