Will and the others have finally arrived at the shopping center! Now the real issue at hand- will they be able to find a suitable present for Misato? Does something like that even exist? Or will they be trapped in a situation where they can't figure out what to get for a Mechadoll who has a dubious level of emotion to appreciate the gift in the first place? I suppose we'll have to see, hopefully they can think of something. Remember to review!

KedharS: Well, Reiner and Nikita are maybe progressing? They're progressing the same way that a couple lost in the middle of nowhere without a GPS is progressing towards their destination.

Arbiter8991: He's certainly giving it his best, though. Misato's just too inscrutable sometimes, unfortunately. Hopefully we'll find out what her primary objective is at some point.

Hyphenman: Yeah, sadly, I haven't been able to use Oscar as much as I would like. But his relationship with Misato is definitely a positive, that's for sure!

Pokemon Academy: Beginning of Beginnings

Chapter 1265

After their quick detour to the library, the trio managed to get to the shopping district so they could finally start picking out a present for Misato.

"So what does Misato like?" Reiner asked. "We can give you advice on generally good presents, but it's better to get her something she'll like, right?"

He said this knowing full well that Misato was a Mechadoll. The idea that she could "like" something hadn't quite sunk in for him.

As he mentioned it, though, Will was acknowledging the same thing privately. Misato's preferences, well… he knew she liked reading. Beyond that, she didn't exactly have interests or hobbies. Whatever else she was, she was still a Mechadoll who did do anything unnecessary. She prioritized efficiency above all else, and didn't really focus on doing anything of note in her free time besides reading, which was just another type of compiling information.

In spite of that, she wanted him to get her a present? What was he supposed to do?

"It's too bad the academy doesn't have a bookstore," Nikita frowned. "She likes reading, right? A good book would have been a nice present."

"Well, it would be hard to justify having a bookstore here," Reiner said. "I mean, the library has so much stuff, do we really need one?"

Nikita sighed. "Still. It would be nice."

"Even if we got her a book, I don't think that would be a good gift," Will said. "She reads so damn fast the present would only be good for what? A couple seconds? Maybe a minute at best? Nah, I don't think that's gonna be good for a present."

"Well, what genres does she like?" Nikita asked curiously.

"I'm not sure she even knows what a genre is," was Will's reply. Misato seemed to read just about anything that was put in front of her. He paused and considered some of the titles he'd seen from her. "…Sci-fi, I guess."

"Figures, since she's a robot," Reiner nodded.

"She also likes romances though," Will added, remembering some more stuff that he'd seen her read. "And when I say romance, I mean romance in the archaic sense. Like Don Quixote, that style of epic romance, not necessarily love stuff."

Reiner pictured Misato with her composed exterior reading Don Quixote. It wasn't an image he could wrap his brain around all that well.

Nikita smiled, which confused Will. "What's up?" He asked her.

"Oh, nothing," she said, shaking her head. "I just think it's cute that you've paid so much attention to her tastes."

He could see it in her eyes, in spite of her supportive words, she was looking at him like he was an idiot who had a crush on his sex doll.

I guess that's not too far off, he had to admit. …Except the sex doll part. I don't have a crush on her, and she's not a… that.

No matter how "fully functional" she claimed to be.

"What about clothes?" Reiner asked suddenly.

"Huh? What do you mean?" Will asked.

"Well, she always wears the same thing, right? That tank top and shirt combo. I don't know, maybe you could buy her some nice clothes or something. Girls like stuff like that, right?" He asked, looking to Nikita for confirmation.

She stared back at him with vacant eyes.

"Reiner, if you give me clothes for my birthday, we're going to have some serious problems," Nikita replied.

Okay, fair, Reiner should have remembered who he was dealing with. When Nikita was engrossed in her studies she sometimes wouldn't change for like a week she was so busy. Wouldn't bother showering, either. Sometimes he imagined that the reason Kitty hung out with their group so much was to get away from how smelly her room could get.

"…Fine, not clothes," he relented. "I doubt she'd really care anyway."

He turned to Will. "I still don't get why she does care in the first place, though," he said. "I mean, she's a Mechadoll, right? Does she really want a present that badly? What would she even do with it? Does she keep stuff for sentimental purposes?"

Heck, now that he thought about it, he wasn't sure if Misato even had a dorm room at the school. Maybe the Phantom just switched her off for the night before going to bed.

Will sighed. "It's complicated. She and I… well, it's like… she's trying to be my girlfriend, you know? And it's the full girlfriend experience."

"Hah!" Nikita smugly grinned. "Totally called it. You two ARE going out!"

"No, we're not… okay, it's… complicated," he repeated, shaking his head. He really had no idea what he was supposed to call their relationship. Heck, he didn't even know if he should be talking about it with them, frankly. It wasn't like Misato had sworn him to secrecy or anything.

"…Okay, look, it's like this. Misato and I aren't really going out," Will tried to explain. "It's more like she's using me as a practice dummy."

"…Oh, so you're the sex doll in this relationship." Reiner was met with an elbow in the gut from his girlfriend for that little line.

"Sort of, what's the platonic version of that?" Will asked, trying to play the weird situation he was caught up in off like a joke. "Basically, she's using me to experience what it's like being in a relationship. Stuff like going on dates, kissing-"

"Gossiping about her behind her back," Nikita threw in, crossing her arms over her chest in a disapproving scowl.

Will winced and averted his eyes. "…Yeah, something like that," he begrudgingly admitted.

"So it's just a test run, to get her more familiar with human emotions and relationships, huh?" Reiner said, stroking his chin thoughtfully. "Okay, that makes sense. More sense than the idea that a Mechadoll could actually develop real feelings."

"Ah, good point," Nikita nodded. "We should have considered that no one would actually develop genuine affection for Will."

Will's eye twitched. "Nice to see you two are having such a good bonding experience over my lack of a social life."

"When you've got the problems we do, commiserating over the misery of others is sort of the main draw of a relationship," Reiner cheerily informed him. "But it's fine. We'll be happy to help you out regardless!"

Will wasn't so sure he wanted their help at this point. But then, it's not like he had a lot of other options, either.

"Fine," he sighed. "So now that you know our relationsip is a trial and not something genuine, what would you suggest getting her as a present?"

"Well, definitely throw out all our old ideas," Nikita said. Reiner looked at her, surprised.

"All of them?" He asked, raising his eyebrow. "I really think getting her some sexy underwear would go a long way for-"

Nikita kicked him in the shin.

"Hey! They're going for the girlfriend experience right?!" Reiner cried while hopping on one leg. "So it would make sense to give her an intimate gift and then transition that to something like having sex, you know?!"

"I get where you're coming from, but also, you're awful, please stop," Nikita replied. "Besides, something like that with a Mechadoll, it's just… brr, no thanks."

Nikita wasn't a bigoted person. As someone with aspirations for a career in science she tried to view all her interactions with people in an objective sense, with some slight biases as far as her idiot boyfriend was concerned.

But the scientist in her just couldn't accept Misato as anything but a robot. No matter how far artificial intelligence and robotics had come in her lifetime, it didn't change the fact that Misato's intelligence was still artificial.

A robot without a real soul was just a machine, right? There was no real reason to concern yourself over human stuff. And having sex with one… well, it wasn't EXACTLY masturbation, not in a technical sense anyway, but it still made her feel a little skeeved out.

She shook her head. This wasn't helping. Whatever her personal thoughts about Misato were, they weren't what mattered right now. She had a job to do, and that was help Will accomplish what he needed to accomplish.

Nikita glanced at her boyfriend, who was sitting down on a bench in the mall and nursing his wounded leg.

And once I'm done helping Will, maybe he can help me, she thought. She hadn't come to the shopping district just to help a guy buy a present for the robot he wasn't having sex with.

Something he was once again asserting heavily.

"I'm telling you, Misato and I aren't having sex," Will pleaded. He was so insistent about it that Nikita and Reiner were starting to get suspicious. Maybe they weren't having sex, but the way he kept bringing it up (even though they were the ones bringing it up) certainly made them question whether or not he wanted to.

They shared a psychic exchange with a glance, both confirming that whatever the answer to that question was, it was none of their business.

"The farthest we've gone is making out," Will added, which brought back rather embarrassing memories for the three of them, when they'd run into each other in the middle of a makeout session, and right after one, respectively.

Seeing the only possibly for the future of this conversation being a bloating of the awkward atmosphere, Nikita wisely decided to put an end to the discussion for good. "Okay, I have a good idea," she suggested. "Why don't we think about what Misato expects for you to get her?"

"Huh? What do you mean?" Will asked.

"Well, she's smart, right? She's got a computer for a brain, so she has to be," Nikita explained. "I bet she's probably really good at chess and stuff like that, since her brain is probably more advanced than even those really complicated chess algorithms they use."

Will nodded thoughtfully. "Yeah, she's definitely smart," he agreed. There wasn't really anyone who would debate that point.

"What's chess gotta do with this, though?" Reiner asked, still confused. Nikita smirked, taking pride in how much smarter she was than her boyfriend. Sure she might not be as smart as the Mechadoll they were discussing, but as far as she was concerned today was a big step forward in women's empowerment.

(Again, literally the only thing they're doing is buying a welcome back present. The author can't stress this enough)

"Chess computers are designed to calculate all possible configurations and choose the most efficient one to advance the goal of success," Nikita explained. "So we need to think like a computer. What is the most effective and efficient way to advance the goal of getting Misato a gift?"

"Well, wouldn't that depend on what she wants from the gift?" Will asked. "What if she wants me to think of something from the heart?"

"Well, then you're screwed, because I'm pretty sure you don't have one of those," Nikita coldly rebuked him. "But what I mean is that, when it comes to girls, and I'm just guessing here, they tend to want their partners to be thoughtful when it comes to picking out gifts, get them things that they predict their partner would want."

"Uh, I don't think that's just a girl thing," Reiner piped up. Nikita gave him a look.

"My POINT is that, as her boyfriend, she probably wants you to anticipate her needs and wants," Nikita explained. "So it doesn't necessarily have to be a gift that you think she would want; I think she just wants you to think about it and give her something heartfelt."

She cleared her throat.

"…And as we've already established, that means you're basically screwed."

Reiner held his sides and began laughing. Will was slightly less amused, glaring at her. She shrugged her shoulders.

"But hey, we're here, so we can help," Nikita said. A shiver went down her spine as she considered the possibility that Misato had even calculated to that extent that they would be helping him pick out a good present. But she quickly dismissed that idea with a shake of her head.

"So I ask again," Will said, "what do you think I should get her?" It had reached the point where they were so busy talking about it they hadn't actually gotten around to buying anything. At this rate, they'd be here all day!"

"Well, why don't we split up?" Nikita suggested. "We can cover more ground that way."

Will and Reiner both stared at her like she was an idiot.

"Split up?" Reiner asked incredulously. "That sounds ridiculous! We're not going around looking at stores, we're trying to find a present! What good is it if I find the perfect present, but don't buy it because I don't know whether or not Misato would like it, since Will isn't here? I'm not made of money, Nikita, I can't just-"

"Stop whining," Nikita pouted. "Look, we don't have to split up for the whole day. Let's just all go around, check out different stores, and if we see anything we like, when we meet up at lunch again we can go back to those stores and review everyone's proposals as a group. Does that make sense?" She asked, looking at the boys' faces.

Well, when she put it like that, Reiner's objections DID seem a little silly. Clearly the other girl had put a lot of thought into this.

"Yeah, I guess that'll work," he nodded in agreement.

"Great!" Nikita chirped. "So Reiner, you go that way, towards the sports goods place and clothing departments, and Will and I will go this way towards the electronics!"

"Wait, how is this splitting up?" Reiner demanded as Nikita lightly pushed him from behind in the direction of the indicated stores. "Isn't this just you kicking me out of the group?"

"Go on, it'll be fine! Just go off and do your own thing!" Nikita urged him. Reiner wasn't having it though. He knew that the second Nikita got rid of him, that would be it for his screentime this arc, and he wasn't about to be shoved into a minor roll again.

But Nikita's smile brooked no arguments, and in spite of his apprehension and frustration he stormed off, looking for stores that might have things a Mechadoll emulating a girl in love would want to receive as a present.

Will stared at Nikita, thoroughly confused. Then the nerd sighed in relief.

"Phew. I thought he'd never leave," she said, turning towards him. Immediately, Will got a very bad feeling.

"H-Hey, listen, I know you think she's just a Mechadoll, but I still feel committed to her," Will said, taking a step back. "So if you're trying to cheat on Reiner with me, you are barking up a very incorrect tree, got it?"

Nikita stared at him in confusion for a second, then that confusion turned into placid disgust.

"Oh, god, why do you have to think like that?" She muttered, shaking her head in disbelief. "Dude, no way. Just because we had a fight doesn't mean shit, no way would I be going after you over Reiner, are you kidding me?"

"…Okay, OW," Will scowled. Talk about an uncalled for statement! "What the heck was that for?!"

"Let's call it payback for the fact that your partner doesn't make jokes at your expense or treat you with disrespect, and go from there," Nikita suggested with a cheery smile, not at all bitter that Reiner was essentially making time with a "partner" who seemed incapable of upsetting or having relationship tension with, something that was very much not the case for either her or her boyfriend.

Will could have gone into detail about all the times Misato seemed impervious to wrapping her artificial brain around the concept of personal boundaries, but decided now wasn't the right time to debate the issue.

"So is that why you wanted to partner up with me, then?" He asked curiously. "Because you wanted to belittle me every chance you get for having a Mechadoll for a 'girlfriend'?"

Nikita blinked.

"…Weeelllll…"

"It's not any more acceptable when you do it, you know," Will scowled. It was becoming readily apparent that Nikita and Reiner were a lot more compatible than either of them gave their relationship credit for.

The pair of them were equally irritating.

While this was being done, Oscar was just getting ready to finish up the major wounds on Misato's body. It would be a pretty big undertaking, and she'd be out of commission for another few days at least, maybe a week.

"I still don't see why you put off getting repaired," he replied. "I could have gotten started way earlier the other day."

Instead, he'd had to work through the night, taking precise care to repair as much of her as he could. Why she'd come to him that late he couldn't be sure.

Misato said nothing.

"This is important, Misato," he sighed. "If there's something hindering your decision-making process to seek repairs, I need to hear about this. Self-preservation should still be among your top priorities, isn't that right?"

"Affirmative," Misato replied. "Achieving the primary objective is the highest priority for this unit. The second-highest priority is preserving the functionality of the cognitive capability and data storage capability of this unit."

"And the third-highest priority?" Oscar asked. So far, so good. He would have put "protecting her brain" above "achieving the primary objective" personally, but that wasn't up to him. He hadn't been the one to program her.

"Preserving the physical integrity of the physical body of this unit," Misato informed him.

"Exactly. And what I'm saying is that by delaying your maintenance for a few more days, you risked the chance of doing more damage," Oscar scolded her.

"Negative. The chance of delaying treatment leading to the accruement of enough physical damage to my body to render repairs ineffective was 1.24%. That number is statistically insignificant," Misato replied.

Oscar raised his eyebrow. That was curious.

"But even if the chance is statistically significant, shouldn't the priority still be to not take that risk?" He questioned.

"Affirmative. However, I calculated the cost-benefit ratio by comparing the chance of sustaining further damage to the loss of mobility for several days as a result of seeking repair, and determined it to be insufficiently motivating to change my determined course of action," Misato replied.

"So if I'm hearing it right, there was something you wanted to do that you decided was important enough to risk sustaining more damage? Even though the risk was negligible enough to be statistically insignificant?"

"Affirmative," Misato confirmed.

"Okay, so what was this thing that you determined was so essential?" Oscar asked curiously.

Misato's answer came immediately.

"Will was returning from spring break. If I were to seek repairs prior to his arrival I would not be capable of greeting him immediately upon his return. I determined that to be an unacceptable course of action," she explained.

Oscar's jaw dropped and he stopped what he was working on.

Misato had risked the chance of sustaining further damage, regardless of how insignificant the potential risk, because she wanted to see a boy the second he got back from spring break?

Aww, if that isn't the most adorable thing I've ever heard! Go get it, Misato, you're almost there! I think it's so sweet that she was willing to risk a 1.24% chance of system collapse all in order to be there to see Will as soon as possible. Talk about a devoted (practice) girlfriend! Who knows, if she's that attached to him, maybe the gift he gets her doesn't even have to be something that fancy!