Usually, it didn't matter who collected the post; whoever was closest would gather it up. For the past few weeks, however, Petunia had been rushing to collect the post as soon as the postman came by. She knew the letter would be arriving at some point before Harry's 11th birthday.

It finally arrived on a warm Wednesday morning. It was thick and heavy, addressed to 'Harry Potter, The Snake Themed Bedroom'. She was suddenly glad that Harry didn't have stranger interests, like the classmate he had mentioned was obsessed with telephone poles. She held the letter with trembling hands and clung to the fact that she had a speech prepared. She had been practising with Brownie, so she knew it was a sensible one.

"Harry, finish your breakfast and then meet me in the sitting room."

Harry looked up from his slightly soggy toast, brows slightly furrowed, hoping she had not found the frogs he had been keeping in a takeout container. They were just the right size for snacking, and quite easy to keep. Folding the toast in half, he crammed it in his mouth and swallowed it whole. "Nice", Dudley murmured, still impressed by Harry's snake abilities.

When Harry entered the sitting room, he immediately knew this was going to be an Important Talk. Aunt Petunia had an odd sort of look on her face.

"If this is about the frogs, I really think I should be allowed to keep them! They haven't escaped, and I'm keeping it really clean so there's no –"

Aunt Petunia cut in with a raised hand.

"Harry! This is not about frogs. I have been meaning to speak to you about this for a while. This is… It's about your parents."

Bob, who had been nestled around Harry's neck perked up at this.

Standing straight and smoothing out her dress, Aunt Petunia began her Important Talk, stumbling over words in a way that showed how nervous she was.

"Your parents… I told you I didn't like to speak of them, and it's because they died in a magic war. Your parents had magic –like your snake powers, but…different. Well, I'm not sure. I never knew much about magic. I didn't – I didn't like it before. She had magic and I didn't, and I was jealous and scared, and it's easier to be angry than scared or jealous. So, I was angry, and I didn't speak to them."

She took a breath, smoothed out her dress again, and kept speaking.

"The magical people don't call them powers. They call it magic, and they call themselves witches and wizards. There was a bad wizard who tried to kill you. Your mother – my sister – Lily – she died protecting you. The bad wizard, I forget his name, he tried to kill you, but it didn't work, and he died instead.

I'm telling you this now because they went to a school – a boarding school – to learn magic, and, well. You've been invited as well. To Hogwarts.

This arrived for you."

She thrust out a letter.

Baffled and overwhelmed, Harry accepted the letter. "To Harry Potter, the snake themed bedroom – they know I like snakes!"

Wringing her hands, Aunt Petunia spoke up again. "Also, you're famous because you didn't die."

Wide-eyed, Harry looked up from where he was inspecting the wax seal. "What?"

"I forgot to tell you that part – you're famous because you didn't die when the bad man tried to kill you. It's why people sometimes stopped to shake your hand when you were younger."

"…Oh, I just thought they liked my outfit or something."

Harry opened the letter, reading the contents with a frown. "What does it mean broom?"

"For flying on", Aunt Petunia answered with her nose in the air. She obviously thought that was uncouth, like motorcycles.

"Oh okay."

Aunt Petunia sat on the sofa and motioned for Harry to sit next to her.

Pointing to the school shopping list, she explained, "We can buy these in the magic part of London –"

"– Camden?"

"What?"

"Well, they've got some interesting things in the stalls there."

"No, it's near Charing Cross."

"Oh, okay… Erm, since it doesn't say that snakes are allowed, but it also doesn't say they're banned, is it okay if I bring Bob –"

Bob chimed in, "And Charybdis."

"And Charybdis?", Harry asked.

"Yes, of course. Hide them like you do at school. Brownie is staying here with me."

"Oh yeah, I don't think she would like to be stuck in a school."

"No, she wouldn't. I asked her."

Harry frowned at that. "Wait, you told Brownie about this first?"

"Well, yes. I – it doesn't matter. The point is, I've told you now. I still don't like to speak of it, so if you have any questions, ask them now."

Harry sat up straighter, trying to think of questions. "Erm. Were my parents part snake?"

"No. They were regular – well – regular magic people. They didn't have any snake powers."

"Oh, that's weird. Then how come I have all my powers?"

"I don't know. Next question."

"Uh. How far away is the school?"

"A few hours."

Harry hadn't ever been away from home for very long. He was a bit nervous about the prospect of a boarding school. Even if Bob and Charybdis were with him, he would miss Brownie and Dudley.

"Can I phone Dudley?"

"No, they don't have phones. You have to send an owl."

"Oh yeah, what does that mean?"

"It's like carrier pigeons."

"Right."

Looking at Aunt Petunia, Harry could tell she was stressed. He wanted to ask more questions, but he didn't want things to be weird, so he decided he would figure things out himself instead. "No more questions… Thanks for telling me about it."

"Yes, well. You had to know. Now, if that's all, you need to write your reply and tell them to send someone to take you to the magic bit of London."

Aunt Petunia handed him a fountain pen and pad of nice writing paper. Harry thought she probably didn't know that he had been borrowing them to practice Parselscipt with Bob.

"Erm… What do I say?"

"Just – tell them you accept and that you need a member of staff to take you to get your school things. You don't need to say much."

"Right, okay."

Once Harry had written his brief reply, essentially quoting Aunt Petunia, he popped it into a nice envelope. "Do we seal it with wax?"

"No, we don't have any, anyway."

"Aw, okay."

Aunt Petunia stared at the envelope, somewhat suspicious of Harry's excellent penmanship. Shrugging it off, she stood up and walked toward the conservatory door. "Now, go find an owl and tell them to take it to Hogwarts."

"Erm, I don't speak owl though."

"It's not – they understand English."

"Oh, that's alright then."

While Harry tried to find an owl, Bob was hiding under his shirt, muttering angrily. "Stupid birds, hunting snakes and getting jobs. Why do they get jobs? I could get a job. A much better job than a fucking owl." Bob had figured out that if he hissed a particular bunch of gibberish in Parseltongue, he was able to say what sounded like "fuck" and "shit" in very accented English.

Harry patted Bob's back consolingly. "I think Friends of Bob counts as a job. We can send letters to Dudley and keep up the business."

When they finally spotted an owl, who picked the letter up gently with its beak, Bob lunged out of Harry's shirt with a hissy "BLAAARGH!". Affronted, the owl swept off with the letter, leaving Harry and Bob giggling together. Harry wasn't much fond of birds.

Oftentimes, it took a little while for things to sink in for Harry. Being told about his parents' death, magic, and being famous was a lot to take in, and certainly took a while to really reach Harry.

A few nights after Aunt Petunia told him, he was lying in bed, chatting to Bob and Charybdis about his feelings. Bob, while sometimes grumpy and often sweary, was actually a very good listener and had a lot of good ideas. Charybdis was also a good listener and had the benefit of being big enough to properly hug. Harry had decided it would be a good idea for her to be smaller when they went to Hogwarts, so she was enjoying her final days of being large.

"It's a bit sad that I don't know my parents, but I'm not very sad because I've got you guys."

"Yes, we are great", Bob replied with a nod.

"You are… I'm not too sad about that. It's weird that I'm famous though. Maybe I'm like Rasputin. He didn't die when people tried to kill him a lot."

"Maybe he was magical as well", Charybdis replied.

"It's so strange thinking of more magical people", Harry mused.

"I wonder if there are others with snake powers…", Bob chimed murmured.

"That would be pretty cool. Even if there aren't, I hope magic people like snakes." Harry was glad that Friends of Bob had led to more people liking the snakes, but he still didn't know anyone who was as interested in them as he was.

Charybdis leaned off the bed, landing with a heavy thud on the sheepskin rug Brownie had somehow dragged back one day. She had said it was from the home of a particularly wasteful human who had eaten the meat of a sheep but not the skin. Harry had explained it as décor but did try eating a bit just to see. It wasn't very good. Charybdis was long enough that she had the front half of her body on the floor, posing in front of the mirror, with her back half still on the bed, a heavy weight on top of Harry.

"Also, it's weird that there was a whole magical war. And why were my parents –"

Harry abruptly sat up. Gently setting Charybdis' tail onto the floor, he quietly opened the door, crept across the hall, and into Dudley's room. Dudley, who had been half asleep, pulled his teddy bear to his chest with an elegant, "Aaargh!", as Harry shushed him.

"Dudley, I think my parents were spies."

Author's note:

Here's where the format changes. Instead of covering a year or half a year per chapter, this will now have several chapters per school year.