He wanted Aonung. That was the first thought that came to his mind as he jerked up, dizziness clouding his vision.
"Neteyam!"
Something dropped to the ground behind him and his mother's face immediately appeared before him. "Oh great mother," she cried out in joy, gathering him into her arms. Pain shot through his chest at the sudden movement and a sharp whimper clawed out of his throat.
Neytiri instantly released him, pulling back and assessing any new damage. His entire chest ached as though it had been crushed. With a quick look, Neteyam glanced down to see his entire upper torso wrapped in bandages. Near the center of his chest, a pad was pressed tightly just below his heart.
"Shush," his mother soothed, wiping the sweat from his face, urging him to lay down. "You need to rest." Neteyam struggled to lie back down, but once he did, Neytiri placed a soft pillow under his head and a cool cloth along his temples.
Staring up at the ceiling, Neteyam attempted to take in his surroundings. He was back in the marui pod. The familiar woven pattern of the skylight he had grown so accustomed to was staring back down at him.
The air around him was filled with a strange herbal smell and it took him a moment to realize it was coming from his mother. In her hands, she held a small bowl filled with a green substance. It had the scent of crushed flowers and earth. With a gentle grasp, Neytiri smoothed it across his chest before tucking the bandages safely back in place.
"What happened?" he croaked out.
His mind was a mess of different flashes. Small instances of recollection were drawing past him as he struggled to piece it all together.
His mom's voice was hesitant as she lowered her hands. "What do you remember?"
There was darkness.
So much darkness that it felt like his body had been wrapped in the night itself. The world felt very far away, the waves that lapped against his limp body were a mere tickle and his chest felt light and easy. He opened his eyes. For a moment he thought he was back at the spirit tree, its flowing branches illuminating him in a soft purple light. But that wasn't quite right. He couldn't be at the spirit tree, he didn't belong in the forest anymore.
For a moment his mind was taken back and the echoing sound of his name on his father's lips reached his ears. But the moment it did, his chest started to contract, ruminating with pain that spread down his arms and spine.
He wanted to shut it out again, so he turned back to the tree. The soft presence of its light encompassed him once more. But it wasn't right. He wasn't right. Neteyam wasn't supposed to be there.
Again he heard his name, only this time it was being shouted. He could hear the pure panic in his mother's voice as her hands clutched onto him. "NETEYAM!"
He felt his consciousness zoom back in slowly, only to see his mom crying over him. The pain in his chest erupted and he felt himself fall back into unconsciousness.
And then he woke up.
"Neteyam," his mother started gently, pulling him back to the present. "You were shot."
Eywa holds all things in her hands. He remembered her saying that once.
And then it all came flooding back to him. The boat, the RECOM, the twisted sneer of the avatar's face as the last bullet pierced his chest. Aonung.
Neteyam instantly shot up again in a panic. Aonung. His mind was filled with the image of the taller boy, clutching him close to his chest, hands covered in blood as he tried to soothe Neteyam.
Neytiri was by his side right away helping to steady him. "What is it, baby?" she asked rapidly, eyes traveling up and down his chest, making sure everything was still in place.
"Aonung!" he exclaimed looking around frantically. "Where is he? Is he ok?"
There had been so much blood. Fuck, it had been everywhere when Aonung found him.
A gentle hand caressed his braids and soothed them back down to his forehead. "Hush my child. All is well Neteyamur," his mother said, murmuring his full name like a prayer. "Everyone is fine. The chief's son is safe. Your siblings are safe. You did well my little warrior. I am very proud of you."
Relief swept through him. Her words sunk into his chest and before he could stop them, fat tears rolled down his cheek. Neteyam let out a sob. A terrified cry that he had been holding in since the moment he woke up. Immediately he was scooped into his mother's lap.
She rocked him back and forth, soothing his breathing and letting him cry. Everyone is safe, he told himself over and over, letting the thought wash through his body.
Once his inhales returned to normal, Neytiri gently set him back down. They sat in a warm silence for a time, soaking in each other's company.
It was his mother's voice that spoke first.
"He came to see you, you know."
Neteyam's head snapped towards her. Aonung came to see him? He looked at his mother for confirmation and she nodded. A stupid warm filled his chest but it was crushed by the reminder of Aonung's horrible words.
"He doesn't feel that way for me mother," he whispered sadly, looking down.
Neytiri's slender hand tilted his chin up. Neteyam let her lift his head but he would not meet her gaze. His mind felt surrounded by the grief he had not been able to process yet. The grief of knowing what he believed to have shared with Aonung was not true. The hesitant way the boy had signed, I see you, replayed in Neteyam's head, making him want to curl up into a small ball.
"He sat with you the first three days."
Shock flooded Neteyam's body and his eyes shot up to meet his mother's. He started to shake his head but she halted him. "I have never seen anyone so dedicated, my son. The Tsahìk herself had to pull him away. He would not leave you."
Neteyam's throat felt dry. Aonung wouldn't leave?
His mother, seeming to sense his need to process, turned her attention toward the door. His father's footfalls could be heard on the platform outside.
"Ma' Jake," Neytiri called out, drawing the focus of her husband. Jake appeared to be returning from the village center, basket in hand. Toruk Makto stuck his head through the doorway at his mate's words, about to ask what was up, when his eyes fell on Neteyam.
"Your son is awake."
Just like Neytiri, Jake Sully dropped everything he held. The fishing poles, the nets, all of it clattered to the ground.
"Son?" he asked in disbelief, frozen where he stood.
Neteyam awkwardly raised his hand, wincing at the pain in his side. "Hey dad."
No words could describe the look of pure happiness on his father's face. The lines of age receded for a moment as he rushed quickly to his eldest child.
Warm, calloused hands, took his face as his father's tired golden eyes scanned all over him, searching for some kind of sign that he was real. That he was ok.
Neteyam choked on the knot at the back of his throat and desperately leaned into his father's touch, relishing in the security it provided. That seemed to be all the confirmation Jake needed because he let out a heavy breath and pulled Neteyam to his chest.
"Oh, son," he whispered, wrapping one hand around the back of his head to keep him steady as he hugged Neteyam.
There was a moment where Neteyam stiffened, remembering exactly why he was shot in the first place. He had disobeyed orders. His father must be so angry with him.
The boy hung his head in shame and pushed away from his father's grasp.
"I'm sorry sir," he said, keeping his voice as firm as possible and not looking up. "I apologize for my actions."
Jake looked completely baffled as he stared down at his son. "Sorry?" he repeated in confusion, brows drawn. "Son, what on earth do you have to be sorry for?"
Shame filtered through Neteyam's body. He had been trained his whole life and yet he still almost got himself killed.
"I disobeyed orders," he whispered, barely daring to look up. "I went against your word on the battlefield. You must- you must be so disappointed in me."
Jake looked as though he had been punched in the gut.
"Neteyam. You saved your brother's life. You went after him. You got Tuk to safety. I am proud of you."
His head shot up in confusion. That couldn't be right. He met his father's eyes carefully and was shocked to see grief.
"Jesus," his dad whispered, hanging his head. "You got shot and you're apologizing. Neteyam I- fuck I am so sorry. You never should have felt like this was your fault. I am never disappointed in you son. Never. And if it had to take a bullet for you to understand that, then I have failed."
"Dad no-" he tried to start. But Jake took his hands firmly, interrupting him.
"I see you, Neteyam," he repeated, not once breaking eye contact. "I see you."
It was as if a dam broke. A dam he had kept up for so long. Trying to be the perfect son, the best brother, the skilled warrior. All of it crumbled and his father was there to catch him.
They stayed like that for a long while, embraced in each other's arms. Neteyam felt himself let go of a heavy pressure on his chest.
Slowly they disentangled and Neytiri placed a happy hand across his forehead, pleased more than anything at the newfound understanding between her husband and son.
"You should find your brother," his dad said with a smile. "He might be even more happy to see you than us."
Neteyam's face stretched into a wild grin at the thought of his brother. He had missed Lo'ak.
Almost forgetting his own state, Neteyam tried to rise to his feet. But he was instantly halted by a massive pain in his back and his parent's hands pushing him back down. But Neteyam shook his head and found his balance once more.
Despite glancing nervously at each other, both parents helped the Omaticaya to stand.
"Easy, easy," his dad said, holding out a reassuring hand as Neteyam fumbled forward a little. "Take it slow boy, there's no rush."
But there was. Neteyam wanted to see his brother. So he pushed forward and ignored the ache in his chest, making his way to the door.
The second the warm air hit his face he knew it was the right decision. His skin was itching for some sense of freedom. More than anything he wanted to ride his ikran. But with a forlorn look at the bandages wrapping around him, he believed that might have to wait a while. Despite it all, from where he could stand, the water looked so beautiful as it crashed in soothing waves across the sand.
"He should be returning now-ish," his father said, glancing up at the sun. "He and Tuk took the ilu's out for a swim."
"It's fine, I'll go and find him," Neteyam reassured, taking a move to leave the marui's walkway.
Neytiri's hands were instantly on his, pulling him back into the hut. "No you have just woken up, you must sit down."
Neteyam had never been more thankful for his father when Jake placed his hand over his mother's wrist and gave her an imploring look. She met his gaze pleadingly, eye's filled with a mother's worry.
Neteyam could practically hear their silent conversation.
Neytiri…
It is too soon. He is not well enough.
He will be fine. Let him go.
Finally her hands receded and she allowed him to step away. Neteyam placed a soft kiss to her brow before shooting his father a thankful look. He winked back and motioned for him to go while he still could. Despite the humor in his eyes, Neteyam could still see the way his brow furrowed, reminding his son to be careful.
As he made his way to the beach, Neteyam found himself with a slight limp. His body ached. But it was a relief to be out by the salty air. The soft tickle of waves at his feet brought a sense of calm to his body. For a moment, Neteyam allowed himself to recount exactly what had happened.
The whole day had felt like a year. The death of Roa, Payakan's rescue, his brother's capture, fighting to save his father, getting shot…
A phantom pain ached up his chest. Neteyam smoothed down the bandages across his torso. He must have been out for about a week judging by the healing process. The area around his heart was still tender under his fingertip. The bullet must have entered just below it, puncturing his lungs. A heavy breath exited his body. It was a miracle he was alive.
"NETEYAM"
Neteyam turned just in time to see his little brother barrel into him. The pain in his chest exploded as Lo'ak pushed them both into the sand but he didn't care. All that mattered was that his baby brother was here. Was safe.
Ignoring the discomfort, he immediately wrapped his arms around Lo'ak's shoulders and hugged him back. "Hey baby brother," he managed to wheeze out.
And then Lo'ak did something he had not done since he was a young child. He burst into tears. Neteyam quickly stood them both up so that he could pull his sibling into a proper hug. He placed one hand over his braids and used the other to tug him closer.
He pulled back slightly when his fingers ran into something metal. Neteyam's feather. The one Mo'at had carved for him long before they left. It was twisted behind Lo'ak's ear. His heart shattered.
"I thought you were gone," Lo'ak croaked against his chest.
I thought you were gone. Neteyam pulled back just enough so that he could grip Lo'ak's face and press their foreheads together. "I would never leave you, you know that."
His brother took in a deep breath and nodded. Perhaps he needed this more than his brother.
"Besides," Neteyam continued, taking a moment to tug on the new charm in his sibling's hair. "If I died, who would you steal hair accessories from?"
Lo'ak immediately pulled back and flushed embarrassedly. "I'm sorry. You can have it back," he stuttered, hands going up to remove it.
Neteyam stopped him. "Don't. It suits you."
"Really?" Lo'ak asked with wide eyes. It was clear the piece meant a lot to the younger boy.
Neteyam grinned back down at him. "Yes, as long as you don't take any of my other things. We don't want Tsireya realizing who the prettiest brother actually is don't we?"
Lo'ak shoved him with a scowl but instantly came back and hugged him again. Neteyam could only smile at his brother's antics as he wrapped him back up in his arms. He was so glad to see him. The way that Lo'ak had taken his hairpiece when he was out only made him realize further how much he loved his family. What he would do for them-
Aonung's voice stopped everything.
Every fiber in his being stilled and he stiffened in his brother's arms at the familiar throaty catch.
"Neteyam?"