Greetings all! Very happy to report I am posting on time! I am getting back into the groove of things. I hope you all enjoy and have a wonderful weekend. Thank you all again for the continued love and support. P.s. yes the song is cheesy but it works for this chapter haha.

I won't say I'm in Love

Get off my case

I won't say it

It's too cliché

I won't say I'm in love, by Alan Menken

Standing in a now empty room beside each other, Cal looked over at Gillian, watching as she closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose. Inhaling deeply, she dropped her hand to her side, looking at Cal.

"well…that went better than expected." She admitted looking at him with a raised eyebrow.

"Far better than what would have happened if I conducted the interview, darling. You always have a way with words." He gave her a small, forced smile.

" An imbalance of power"

"Everything could be lost with one false move."

"He has hurt me more times than I can count."

Each phrase felt like a stab to the gut again and again.

Jesus Christ, is that how I have made her feel? I don't blame her. I fucking threatened everything we have over her freezing finances, for god's sake. Slept with clients, Walloski and gambled money we needed more than anything. You're a total and complete wanker. You dream about her night after night, fantasizing about something more, but the reality is that she would never want more. Why would she? You have pushed her so bloody hard because you what? Don't want to have your feelings any more so you push and push until you stop having feelings for her or she finally leaves? Doing so I have made our relationship unbalanced , and she's frightened of losing it. Losing everything because of my bloody behavior. And she should be.

"hey… you okay?" She walked closer to him, getting into his personal space, tilting her head softly. A look of concern over taking her as she looked at him curiously.

Shit I hope she didn't see anything on my face. Cover quickly , distraction!

"I should get back to it….Check in with Loker and Torres; make sure they haven't screwed up those Goldstein cases you worked so hard to get for us." He gave her a teasing tone as he said the words 'worked so hard'.

"Hey! I worked very hard to set up that meeting il have you know. I called repeatedly. " She fought back giving him a smirk.

"oh ei, and can I ask what it took for them to finally agree to that meeting?" He asked with a playful glint in his eyes.

"I might have… gone to the office…. unannounced to talk to 'Bill' Robert Goldstein…and he agreed to have a meeting." She defended her self stating back at him.

"Your good with your words darling but sometimes you gotta use all your strengths." He waved his hands up and down signaling to her body. Causing her mouth to open slightly as she playfully hit his arm.

"Cal!" she shouted hiding back a smile.

"Well it certainly worked…now if you will excuse I'd hate for 'Bill' to not think we are doing a good job. He might think we are just using you as a ploy to get men to agree to working with us." He fired back again with a grin as she pushed him away in a playful manner.

"Go!" Gillian called out as he swaggered out of the office.

Cal sat in his dimmed study mindlessly looking over some of the 'Goldstein Law Office' cases Loker and Torris had been working on. Minutes turned to hours, his mind not letting him focus on the files in his hand but being overrun by Gillian's words in the cube earlier.

" He has hurt me more times than I can count." She meant every word she said in that room. If there is one thing that came out of this weekend, it's that I'm doing the right thing. I did the right thing not letting anything more happen then kissing and light grouping happen at her home. I don't know where I got the bloody idea that she could possibly even want something more with me. The only reason she even kissed me that night was because she was drunk and upset. It didn't mean she wants more with the likes of me. You continue to just hurt her over and over, even when you aren't trying to push her away like before. You where nice all weekend and you still hurt her. Mainly because you cant keep your dick in your pants with Zoe and shes disappointed in you mate…but hurt non the less….Why would she want to be with someone who continues to cause her pain? She wouldn't. "Imbalance of Power" Christ I have made her feel like she has no say in our partnership. Like she has no say in our friendship. Especially when I don't listen to her and keep making the same mistakes with Zoe, the Poppys…God damn it. All she is doing is looking out for me like a good friend. I might not be able to have what I really want, but my God, I won't have her feeling that she has to walk on eggshells around me. I need to make this right.

Knocking on her door, Cal walked in to Gillians' office immediately not waiting for her to respond. Looking over at his partner, she looked up from her computer. He watched her glance up as an eyebrow arched and she smirked softly to herself before returning her eyes back to her computer.

"Are you finished hiding from me, Cal?" she teased as she continued typing.

I thought my distraction was good enough, figured she would have seen right through it.

Walking over to her sofa, he plopped his body down with a dramatic flare.

"Whatever do you mean, darling? I have been working nonstop-"

"Oh, please," she interrupted with a smile, glancing back up at him before looking back at her computer screen.

"I need to protect the company name; I can't have Torres and Loker mucking it up and all. We need to make sure they are doing a good enough job on those cases." He defended himself by folding his hands along his lap.

"oh absolutely." She nodded, biting her lips back from a grin as she looked up at him.

"And I'm guessing you hiding alone in your library... Working so very hard reviewing those files… had nothing to do with my conversation this morning with Elizabeth, did it?" She leaned back in her chair, watching him with an amused look.

"Whatever do you mean?" he countered, looking up at her but quickly looking away from her piercing blue eyes.

"I might not have been able to see your face during the interview but I could read you when the lights went down." She said giving him a knowing look.

Turning off her computer, she got up from her chair and walked over to the other side of the sofa, sitting next to him.

"Do you want to talk about it?" she asked warmly with a tilt of her head.

"nothing to-" He stopped himself from lying as her brow arched once more, knowing the words he was about to speak would more then likely be untrue.

"Yes…I would like to talk about it." He said softly not meeting her eyes.

"Okay then." She reclined back on the sofa, looking at him with compassion and care. As she waited for him to begin speaking.

"You meant what you said in the cube... I could read it all over your face." He pointed his finger at her face, waving it around.

"I did." She nodded, looking him in the eyes, waiting for him to continue.

"I don't know where to begin, darling..." He drifted off, looking down at the ground and breaking eye contact with her.

"The beginning is always a good start." She forced a small, assuring smile at him, seeing him glancing up and then back down.

"I should have talked to you…. long before I said everything I did in the cube today…. I shouldn't have blindsided you. Im sorry."

"It wasn't a blind side; it was more of finally hearing unspoken words you have suspected." He looked her in the eyes as he exhaled. "and don't apologize luv you have nothing to be sorry for. Honestly."

"The last few months have been trying to say the least…You have been acting differently with me." She said sadly almost with a whisper with her last words.

I'm acting differently because I don't know how to act. How are you supposed to behave when your madly in love with your best friend? Not that what I have been doing is okay... far from it. But I don't know how to bloody well act? We where good before, before feelings got involved…Was there ever really a before? Or was it that she was just unavailable and I told my self it would never happen so don't even dream of it?

"You have been more...risky. Not listening to anyone else but yourself… Not caring what I have to say. We are a partnership, Cal, and you threatened that?! Not only was it a threat to my career, but a threat to our friendship." Her voice cracked as she spoke, sounding more upset and frustrated as she continued speaking.

"Something has changed in you toward me…. Your distant…Cold….I don't know what I've done-" Her eyes teared up as she spoke.

"You haven't done anything, luv. I'm… I never wanted you to feel this way."

"Then what's going on? Because I really don't understand. One minute, you're my charming, funny, intelligent best friend. The next, your uncaring, hurtful-"

"I have been a prick." He admitted turning his body to look directly at her. "And I'm sorry."

"Did the Cal Lightman actually say sorry?" She asked, in shock as she wiped the unshed tears from her eyes.

Sliding over in his seat, he sat closer to her, placing his hand on top of hers.

"Only when he really fucks up... and only when he really means it when he says, I'm sorry."

"Do you want to tell me why?" She squeezed his hand as she spoke, looking up at him with glossy eyes.

Yes, but I can't. No chance no way. I wont say I'm in love with you. That I don't know how to act anymore, so I pull your pigtails. Ah, yes, very mature, you plonker.

"I think… I was and am still processing a lot….With the business in the red its added pressure….and our relationship isn't the same as it was when we started all of this ." He waved his hand flippantly.

"What do you mean by that?" she asked, looking upset and confused at his words.

"Just that it's different now."

"Because you found out I had to lie to you when we met? Is that what this is still about Cal? You know why-"

"Its not that!" he interrupted almost shouting it. Causing her to jump slightly from his loudness.

"well it's not just that…we have been through a lot together...you scrapped me off the floor after my divorce with Zoe. Then your divorce…Terry, Emily leaving for college, the bloody line…. So much has happened…I guess I'm just worried that you will leave… like everyone else has." He let the truth bleed into his words. An honest, painful statement, but not the whole gut wrenching truth. He watched as her eyes, once filled with sadness, were now filled with outrage and frustration.

"So you have been pushing me… being a complete asshole to me, because you think I'm going to leave you? And what… you wanted to do was push me away? close yourself off? Be cold before….before…" Her eyes widened as she stopped mid sentence. Pulling her hand quickly from his. He could see so many emotions flash across her face as she let her normally well-practiced mask slip. He could see anger and annoyance flickering over her features, and like a painful wave, hurt came crashing in. Her eyes watered again.

"you hurt me…before I could hurt you?" she stared at him in disbelief as she waited for him to answer her.

You apologized for hurting her, and you hurt her again. Brilliant.

He opened his mouth to try and speak, but to no avail, as no words could be formed.

What the fuck do I say? Everything I can think of saying will bloody well admit how I feel in some way. I'm afraid you will leave because I can't imagine a single day without you. I tried closing myself off because I thought it would hurt less. You hit the nail on the end, I hurt you before you could hurt me because I'm a selfish bastard.

She looked at him with disbelief as she shook her head. Inhaling through her nose and exhaling. He watched as something passed over her face. She raised her hand to his face, cupping his chin.

Its Realization, that's what she expressed.

"I'm not Zoe...I will never be Zoe…. I couldn't even imagine leaving you…Leaving what we have built." She looked him straight in the eyes as she spoke, letting him see every truth behind her words. Her caring and compassion but most of all her love.

Looking down in shame, he felt his eyes water as he listened to her words. She raised his head with her palm, keeping it firmly on his cheek so he could not look away.

"That thought alone... it's like tearing flesh... It's too painful to even imagine." He watched a tear broke free from her eye, going unnoticed by her as she kept staring at him.

"You are my dearest friend. You mean so much to me. This place means so much to me…but that doesn't mean I'm going to let you walk on me or treat me poorly. I deserve better than that…. I'm your partner; you are not my boss…And I'm also your best friend. You need to treat me as such." Another tear fell from her eye as she let her hand fall from his face.

"Your right darling, you deserve far better." He wrapped his arm around her shoulder, pulling her tightly to him. "far better." He kissed the top of her head as she leaned into him, letting her body rest against his.

Far better than me, than what I can give you.

"Didn't think we had as much in common with Perry and Elizabeth as we do." Gillian said sadly resting her head on his shoulder. "We all need to work on our partnerships…and friendships."

"We will darling, both are far too valuable to give up on il tell you that." He gave her a quick squeeze.

They sat quietly together in each other's embrace on the sofa. Neither talked; just comfortable with one anothers silence for several minutes.

"On a positive note, once we get paid by Perry, we will officially be in the green." Gillian spoke up, looking over at him with a delicate smile.

"Thank God for that; we need to celebrate!" he said, squeezing her shoulder with a wide smile.

"We haven't been paid yet, Cal." She said with a shake of her head. "Perry came by when you were hiding—I mean, working in your library." She playfully corrected herself.

"Ei ei, and how is Pera holding up?"

"He said that Elizabeth and him have been talking since he left. They have a lot of ground to cover, but they will make it. He said they mean too much to each other not to make it work."

"Sounds very familiar." He smiled briefly at her.

"That it does…I'm glad he listened to us. He also said we are invited to the Lavi fashion show. He would like his new 'friends' to attend." She looked at him with amusement as he cringed at the words "new friends."

"It was one night of drinking, and he thinks we are best mates!"

"You do have a way with people." She laughed to herself, shaking her head.

"Are you going to go to the show? I asked for an extra ticket for Emily; I figured she would want to attend."

"Always looking out for me and mine you are." He grinned at her, causing her to smile in return.

"Does that mean you are going to the show?"

"Are you going?" He tilted his head to the side, cocking an eyebrow up at her.

"Yes. First of all, he asked, and second of all, I would love to see his new line. Third of all, we haven't been paid yet, and he is still technically our client until the end of the day on Thursday. So I would like to keep him happy." She spoke matter-of-factly as she shrugged her shoulders.

"So you're telling me to play nice until we have the money in hand?" He smirked, teasing her.

"In far less assertive words...Yes yes I am." She said as she crossed her arms under her chest.

"You are my partner, and I will do as you say." He smugly said with a grin.

"really? I could get used to you saying yes to everything." She flirted with a coy smile.

Just as he was about to speak, the door opened, and Emily walked in. Looking between them, the two partners sat right next to each other with no room between them. Neither stirred at her arrival, comfortable with their closeness.

"You two know that the office has been technically closed for over an hour, right?" She smiled at the two plopping down into the chair next to the couch.

"I didn't know we had a new company manager watching everyone's time cards." Cal joked as he looked at his daughter.

"You were supposed to be home awhile ago. You're making dinner tonight; did you forget?" She gave her father a wide-eyed look as she stared at him. Then I looked over at Gillian, who was smiling softly while watching the two.

"Gil, you should come over for dinner tonight!" She smiled widely at her.

"Thank you, Emily; that's a really sweet offer, but I'm going to have to decline. I have plans tonight."

"Like a date?" Emily asked curiously, leaning forward in her chair and watching Gillian carefully. Seeing her father sit up straighter in his seat, perking up, waiting for an answer

"No spin class actually. I didn't do anything this weekend and don't want to get out of the groove of things." Gillian stood up from the sofa and made her way to her desk, putting away a few things.

"Spin class, huh?" Cal asked, getting up and shoving his hands in his pocket, looking at her questioningly.

"Just….spin class." She said, firmly grabbing her purse and looking him in the eyes. Showing him that she was telling the truth.

"Well, that's a bummer. I hope we can do something all together before I go back to school." Emily said sadly, standing up next to her dad.

"Well actually… We will ALL be attending the Lavi fashion show, so-" Gillian was interrupted by a loud squeal from Emily as she came over and hugged her tightly.

"Oh my God, really? I'm so excited! Thank you, thank you!" She loudly proclaimed rocking Gillian in a tight embrace, causing Gillian to laugh. Emily finally dropped her arms from around the other woman as she spoke.

"Thank your father; he and Perry are practically best friends now." Gillian teased with a wide smile. walking to the door as Emily and Cal followed.

"really? I didn't know dad could make friends besides you, any way. And he should count his blessings for that. Not that you two are just frien-." Emily looked incredulously at her father.

"Oi, I can be the friendly type!" Cal interrupted quickly before Emily could add anything further. Arriving at the elevator, the three entered with soft laughs as the doors closed.

Wednesday morning, Cal woke up to a knock at his door.

Who the bloody hell could that be this early?

Getting up from his bed, he stumbled groggily to the door. Answering it, he saw a man retreating to a black SUV. Looking down, he noticed several boxes left on his porch. neatly packaged black boxes with large white bows and bright pink tags. Looking down at them rather puzzled, he bent down to grab the envelope on top reading the words "The Lightmans, from Lavi."

Interesting that is. Better be filled with money for the case. He cheekily thought.

Grabbing the boxes and closing the door behind him. He sat them on the dining room table as Emily shuffled around the kitchen, pouring herself a bowl of cereal.

"Whats that?" Emily asked as she scooped a spoonful into her mouth.

"What are you doing up so early?" he asked as he began to open the envelope.

"Well, it's not everyday your dad takes the day off from work to take you to a fashion show. Mom's already in the shower, so I wanted to grab breakfast real quick and hoping in after she is done."

"I'm not technically taking the day off; all of this is for work." He mumbled as he opened the envelope and read the letter.

'Doctor, I know these events are not your typical style, so I wanted to thank you for still attending. I hope Emily and Mrs. Landau enjoy these pieces. As for yours, I think this might be more your style.

Ton Ami: Your Friend, Perry'

"Are you going to tell me what's in the box?" Emily asked cheerfully as she walked over next to her dad.

Grabbing the box with Emily's name, he handed it to his daughter.

"You're going to have to tell me, luv; I've been told not to open things that aren't mine." He playfully said grining widely at his daughter as she squealed and opened the box in a hurry.

Reaching inside, Emily pulled out a dress, deep blue long-sleeve with a high neckline. Short but not overly short, with a more open back. A pair of black boots with chains around the back were also found in the box.

"Holy cow, this is gorgeous! I was just going to wear my prom dress, honestly." She helped her dress up with pure excitement and awe.

"A little warm for spring, don't you think?" Cal asked, holding his hand out to touch the fabric.

"Dad, spring fashion shows are showing fall and winter fashion. If its spring and your showing spring clothes, you would have no time to buy." She said this matter-of-factly, grabbing the shoes along with the dress and walking to her bedroom.

Opening the box made out to him, he pulled out the black suit. black gun metal, to be exact, with a sheen to it. The fabric looked incredible expensive and felt even more so. Black and black everything, as impeccable crafted as the one Perry gave him for the party. A pair of black loafers were also in the box. a small black chain along the front, similar to Emily's boots. Looking around the box, he noticed no tie this time. Seeing a small note card that simply said,

'You don't seem like a tie guy to me, Doc, This seems more your style. P'

Two designer suits and a designer dress for my daughter and Zoe And seven figures on top of all of this? This guy might be the best client we have ever had.

Reaching for his phone, he dialed Gilliam's name. Waiting for an answer as it rang.

"Well, good morning to you; you're up early." She answered, and he could hear the smile in her words.

"Not by choice, darling, a knock at the door woke me up. Speaking of which, did you receive a similar wake-up call in the form of designer clothing being left at your door?"

He heard a hesitation before she spoke.

"similar yes, but different..." She said it with a pause.

"How so?" he asked as his curiously heightened by her response.

"Well… Perry is currently in my living room."

"He what?" he yelled in disbelief.

"Good morning, Doctor!" Perry's voice was heard getting louder on Gillian's phone.

"I hope you and your family like everything." He cheerfully said Hearing a beep, the phone switching over to speakerphone.

He just showed up at her bloody house. He couldn't have sent one of his little henchmen. No, why would he? He thought bitterly.

He heard Gillians' voice speak up,

"Perry was…kind enough to come over personally to gift me an outfit for the show today."

"Was he now?" Cal asked, feeling the jealousy fuel him up.

"I wanted to make sure it fit, and I'm glad I did. Breasts and hips fit perfectly... But the waist was not tailored to my standards." Perry said more to himself than anyone else, sounding distracted.

Oh, I'm bloody sure the breasts and hips fit great since that's all you seem to look at. Bloody wanker. I should come over. Make sure he behaves him self. Jesus christ mate stop that she is your friend not your wife, not your girlfriend, she's not yours.

"I should get going while I can still move freely." Gillian laughed softly as she spoke.

"I'll see you at the show, Cal."

"right….See you then, luv." He answered as he hung up.

I take back what I said about him being the best client we have had.