Every little mistake, every little life changing moment, and he didn't want that for himself. Even if he knew what he was getting into when he entered the hero course, he went in knowing that eyes would be on him no matter what he did and no matter where he went; that alone was a feeling he wasn't sure he enjoyed. No, he knew he didn't enjoy that. But it was strangely a different case all together when it had come to Hizashi.
He didn't want those eyes on him but rather he needed them, and he did his best to make sure those eyes would gravitate towards him even if it was in response to his sullen or snappy attitude at the moment. He wanted to be the focal point, the one thing Hizashi could watch, and he wanted every move he made to mean something when that gaze was on him. All this time he never thought it meant anything, that he was merely besotted and absolutely, disgustingly in love with the blonde that he merely wanted to be his number one.
However, here lately, Shouta was really wondering if there was something more to it than he originally thought. Shouta didn't think of it at the time, hadn't even considered it, but there had been moments. Moments where he'd be in the apartment, having gotten pretty turned on from the flirtatious pictures Hizashi would send him that often included a lifted shirt to flash his smooth stomach with that hint of muscles to it or the way he would hook his thumb into the waistline of his pants tugging them down just a bit to reveal the dip of his pelvis.
And it was in those moments where, given he was confident he had time, that he would naturally masturbate to the images paired with the rather scandalous texts the blonde would be sending him despite being on patrol or at the damn agency. He hadn't thought anything of it; hadn't thought one bit about the reaction at the time, the chills it sent down his spine as he sat there with his feet braced on the coffee table and squirming with the thrill of getting caught.
The thought of Hizashi walking right in like any other day and having those eyes on him as he touched himself. He hadn't stopped to think about what it meant, and he hadn't thought about it any other time it happened afterwards as these little thoughts of having the blonde watch him as he touched himself, never pieced it together in the slightest bit just what that meant for himself. He had looked it up online at one point.
He had been convinced there might have been something wrong with him, only to get some rather bland articles about it being some chemical or instinct thing in the human brain that made it thrilling to be caught doing something he shouldn't. And that's what he chalked it up too; an instinct or something. Just a dirty thought that did a whole lot to get him horny. Of course, now as an adult he realized there was a word for people who liked to be watched while doing that type of thing, people who got off on their partners watching.
It was the exact word he himself had added to the list. Exhibitionism. He had heard the word be thrown around countless times in his life, heard it described for other people all the time in that playful and joking manner, but he never actually thought it would be something that would connect with him. He wasn't the type who wanted to have sex in risky places, didn't want to be caught that way, but rather he wanted only one set of eyes on him, and they were the only ones that ever counted.
Had been the only ones that counted. It's where he sat now on the couch, biting at his thumb nail while scrolling through an article waiting for Hizashi to walk through the front door. He didn't know how the blonde would feel after the day he had, given the texts he'd gotten, so he knew he needed to go about this carefully. Don't spring it on him. Just say it casually or cautiously. Hitoshi had long since taken off with his group of friends, Eri was tucked away in bed and had fallen asleep long before her head even touched the pillow.
It was just them for all intents and purposes. He could get away with something like this. He hissed when he bit too low, ripping the nail away and he frowned at the hangnail it left him as he then shook his hand out cursing under his breath as he put his phone down on his thigh to use his other hand to pull at the skin on the side of his nail to look at the hangnail nestled there. Fuck. He was lifting his thumb to his mouth, to see if maybe he could rip it out with his teeth rather than dig for it with the clippers like he knew he should.
As he bit down on the little offending piece of nail he heard the sound of a key sliding into the lock followed by that little click. He heard the hinges of the door squeak lightly as it was opened, reminding him he needed to get some WD-40 on it before he forgot again, and yet he jumped to his feet yanking his hand away from his mouth only to hiss as he ripped that hangnail out. Was it the whole thing or just a bit? He had no clue. "Shit!"
"Sho?"
He heard the feet long before he saw his husband but when that head poked around the doorway before the rest of him followed and Shouta could see how the day had worn on his husband. His patience, from what he could tell from a look alone, was a thread. It was a tiny, itty-bitty thread that was more translucent and delicate than a spider's thread. He was barely hanging on. It wasn't often that Hizashi was left so frazzled like this.
Yet it made him all the more determined to offer his suggestion, the idea of it at the very least if his husband wasn't in the mood, and he shook his hand out. "You good? What'd you do?"
"Hangnail, doesn't matter. Come here."
He then raised his hands up expectantly with his order, curling his fingers a few times until the blonde was smiling softly at him as he stepped into the room making his way over to Shouta and he slid his arms around his shoulders nuzzling his throat while arms wrapped around his waist. Holding himself tightly to Hizashi, he then shifted pushing in a twisting motion until Hizashi was sitting on the couch allowing himself to climb into his lap, keeping his face pushed into his throat, tightening his own arms around his shoulders in response to the arms that tightened on his waist tugging him snuggly into Hizashi's lap.
He kissed the side of Hizashi's neck, nuzzling his face into that spot just below his jaw that would make him- yup. Yup, yup, he could feel the blonde slumping into the couch. "Poor baby, you had such a long day, huh?"
"Been a long ass day." Hizashi mumbled pressing his cheek to the top of Shouta's head, squeezing his waist gently shivering lightly at the lips fluttering along his neck and throat softly, the warm breath caressing his skin, the firm feel of his husband pressing against him was amazing.
Exactly what was needed. Shouta hummed softly kissing that fluttering little pulse just above his nose before nuzzling the spot making the blonde sigh softly as his hands slid up and down his back slowly. He reached his hands up to lightly twist a few locks of that blonde hair around his fingers, curling and uncurling until he felt Hizashi's lips pressing to the top of his head softly as he inhaled the scents of his weak cologne and aftershave from that morning that were barely noticeable from a distance.
A person would have to be this close just to catch the scents and even then, they were painfully weak. Just barely there. "What did you do today, baby?"
"Mmmm, nothing much. Slept mostly. Took care of Eri, hung out with Nem on a video call and Hitoshi took off forever ago to hang out with his friends while Eri is currently snoozing away at the moment." He breathed against his throat pressing a soft kiss to the skin again as he continued curling then uncurling the hair around his fingers softly getting a hum from the blonde in return as he shifted on his lap when he took a deep breath.
Okay. He could mention it. He could just say he learned something new, bring it up carefully, and see where Hizashi takes it. Pick the song and let Hizashi set the pace. "So, I learned something new. Real interesting you might say."
"You? Learned something new? My, my, so an old dog can learn new tricks! What did you learn today?"
He lightly smacked the back of Hizashi's head in reprimand making the man laugh softly against his hair before mumbling what sounded like some half-assed apology though he couldn't exactly make it out when those lips were pressing against his hair when he spoke. He always found himself irritated when the blonde did that. That he would mumble his words, hiding his face in his hair making those words even harder to understand but today he could spare some understanding.
The blonde, from what his texts said, had a long day that was one shitty thing after another which really did explain that look he'd had when he walked through the door; the one that clearly shrieked that he was seconds from snapping. He then rubbed the back of Hizashi's head with a huffing sigh that he hoped would be taken the playful way he aimed for it to be. "Shut up. Anyways, I guess you could say I already knew about it maybe, subconsciously, but it wasn't until today that it felt like I really learned about it. Um, what do you know about exhibitionism?"
"Exhibitionism? I heard of that before. Yeah, definitely have! Isn't it on the list too?" Hizashi questioned slowly, like he had no rush to speak and let the words fall out lazily one by one as his hands continued sliding up and down Shouta's back just as slowly until he felt his breath hitch when the fingers plucked idly at his shirt when they neared the bottom.
Shouta evened out his breathing instinctively though it didn't stop his heart from skipping nor his stomach from fluttering excitedly, hopefully that hands would snake under his shirt like they would any other day. "All I really know about it is that there's some real weirdos out there that like jerking it or fucking outside, maybe even getting off on being naked out there but that's clearly not the way you mean it, right? There's something different you learned about it, maybe, if you're asking me about it! What do you know about it, Sho?"
"Um." Did he say it with his face hidden? Or pull back to say it? He knew one thousand percent if he had to look at Hizashi while he spoke, he'd be a stuttering, blushing mess and he didn't know if he really wanted to deal with that sort of reaction at the moment. So, staying in place it was. "I mean, there's obviously people like that. But, uh, it's mostly about being watched. Having someone watch you."
"Mhmmm, I figured that much. Anything else you learned about it, baby?"
"Well, it's also the flip side of voyeurism, which is also on the list mind you, but exhibitionism is sort of centered around the excitement of being watched while naked or doing sexual things and sometimes it's a fantasy but applies to the actual act of doing it." He paused letting the words sink in before he took a deep breath as he decided to move, pulling back to look at his husband. "I'm not suggesting we bring someone in to watch us."
"Of course not."
"But."
He paused again feeling a weak blush crawl into his cheeks, looking away from that curious look on his husband's face before forcing himself to look back at him. He just needed to say it. It didn't have to happen tonight, not if Hizashi wasn't in the mood, but the least he could do was admit it. Out loud. How long had he wanted it subconsciously? Or consciously? A while. A very long while. He let the next breath he took expand his chest just a bit before letting it rush out and he shifted on the blonde's lap slightly as if he needed to steal himself before saying it.
Before admitting it out loud. "I wouldn't mind it. If you watched me."
"Oh."
It was quiet. Was his heart always so loud in the silence? His breaths always so gratingly loud? He bit his lip staring at Hizashi who was staring at him with those wide eyes, eyes that were glittering with curiosity and he could tell from the look along that perhaps, maybe, the blonde was considering it. His face was hot, his hands twisting then untwisting those locks of hair around his fingers just to give his hands something to do as he waited for something more from his husband.
Anything else. But he got nothing, just that wide eyed look that told him the blonde had adopted and he could see a soft pink blooming in his cheeks that were still covered with that cover-up to hide away his freckles which he always hated. He would never understand why Hizashi covered up those freckles with make-up the way he did as there was nothing to be ashamed of; they were adorable, beautiful and he adored kissing every little smattering of those freckles whether they were the ones on his face or the patch work covering his shoulders.
He loved them. Though pouting now wasn't something he should do; he didn't want Hizashi to think he was pouting to get his way with the kink, and it was embarrassing to say he hated that the freckles were always covered because it made Hizashi unbearably smug for the following days and often teased him about it. All in good humor but he'd still rather not hear about it. Not when he was already being questioned by Yagi and Nemuri together about the other day. Fuck, focus! Focus, focus on the hand at task.
"W-Would you want too? Tonight? You wouldn't have to do anything just... just watch. Watch me do, I don't know, whatever. Masturbate I guess it'd be? Since I'm not having sex with anyone else and you certainly can't watch the both of us at the same time, so I guess it'd be like, um, watching th-those videos of people masturbating online? You know, the ones aimed at that specifically?"
He sure was convincing, wasn't he? He fidgeted on Hizashi's lap, biting his lip again for a moment as his cheeks throbbed faintly with the heat burning there and he could feel that heat in his neck, in the tips of his ears already, and he fought the urge to rub his hands against his cheeks. Hizashi merely raised his brows at him, his surprise still glowing in those large green eyes of his but those lips were quirking into a smile.
A little temptation he was offering, he could see that. He dragged his teeth over his bottom lip, taking a deep breath to ground himself. To attempt to appease the nerves going wild through him leaving him shaky and leaving him feeling breathless from just how hard his heart was being. How his stomach squirmed and clenched up tightly as he took yet another deep breath. He scratched at his cheekbone lightly before licking his lips, swallowing and speaking again.
"Y-You had a long day anyways, if you don't want to that's okay. I just figured it'd be like-like the humping thing. It's not sex but still sexual, I guess? Only if you want to. If you'd even want to watch something like that. Obviously the exhibitionism is c-consensual in this case since I'm offering it to you but you choose. It's something we can do but, uh, if it's something only if you want too."
"'Only if I want too'? Darling boy, I'd love too! Who wants to turn down the idea of watching their husband like that? Who would turn down any offer at watching their partner touch themselves? Absolutely I'll fucking watch you! I've had a long ass day but that doesn't mean I don't want to see the sexiest man on the planet touch himself!"
He smiled then at Shouta making his face flame with a fresh wave of heat, his hands twisting into the blonde locks of hair when the blonde leaned in kissing those hot cheeks softly, moving his lips up to the side of his nose softly then to the arch of his brow in an offtrack move before coming back down to rub his nose with Shouta's. He pulled back after a minute, hands twisting tightly into those locks instinctively.
"Give me a few minutes to find something to eat first because I am fucking starving and I have to wash my face but then I'll be right there, baby, okay?"
"Okay! You have dinner in the microwave, you can just heat up! I'll, um, I'll go get ready then?"
He sounded so uncertain of himself. He wanted this, for as long as he could possibly remember, and yet he was cautious about actually diving into it; that there was a difference between masturbating alone in an apartment, fantasizing about Hizashi watching him or possibly even catching him in the act and intentionally doing it. When Hizashi nodded he stopped his curling movements, pulling his hands from the blonde locks, and climbed off of his husband's lap.
Holding back a little shiver as the hands slid along his waist as he moved backwards until he was standing up then walking to the side around the coffee table allowing Hizashi to stand up. "I'll see you in the room then. I'll get the cats out so try not to let them in when you're done."
"You got it, baby!" Hizashi chirped before swaying forward onto his left foot, lifting a hand up to grab his chin and he let out a little sigh when the blonde pressed his lips firmly yet ever so sweetly against his own in a brief kiss that lingered one, two, three heartbeats long before breaking away.
He smiled softly as he stepped backwards before spinning to the entrance of the living room with Hizashi following after him, the sound of his shoes on the floor was strangely comfortingly to him as he entered the kitchen turning down that little hallway while Hizashi flew over to the microwave. He knew he had the look of a man calm, collected and rational about the offer, about what they were about to do.
And beneath it, his heart was positively slamming against his chest with that sickening sensation that had his stomach squeezing and fluttering just as violently until he felt he would puke. It was so intense, so strong as it rocked through him hand-in-hand to create a sensation that had his breaths cresting into a light version of those hyperventilating breaths he was far too accustomed too and he stumbled over his footing as he crossed the threshold of the bedroom.
He wasn't scared, it wasn't that at all, nor was he really all that anxious but rather he was excited to try it. He didn't think of himself much as an exhibitionist, never wanted to think that he could be that type of person, but the facts were the facts no matter how he tried to reconstruct it. He rubbed at his face, rubbing his palms against his cheeks then scrubbing at his eyes fiercely as he paused just in front of the doorway taking a few moments to breathe in through his nose then out through his mouth.
To calm that sickening sensation of the excitement that was tearing through him. He dropped his hands after a handful of breaths in through the nose then out through his mouth before he could even think of moving. Of putting this scenario into play, bringing it to life. He walked over to the bed reaching for Sterling who snapped her head up before shooting faster thana bullet off of the bed and out the bedroom doors making him blink as Twix also got up at the kitten's movements before rushing off just as quickly.
That left him with just Simba and Cosmo, the two being picked up easily enough as he then walked across the room tossing them gently into the hallway where they landed on their little paws with thumps. He leaned his head out the door listening to the sound of a fork possibly scraping against a plate, his heart jumping at the sound as he tugged the doors shut. Alright, alright! This isn't anywhere near as weird as anything else they've done.
He can either proudly or shamefully admit to the car, to degradation, to shibari, to some weird version of a threesome, and he had only recently actually dipped into omorashi for his husband which wasn't nearly as bad. That and the dry humping had been tame in a way, so this was no different in reality. He was just... just what? Going to touch himself while Hizashi watched him? That's what he wanted ever since he developed feelings for the blonde.
The craving to have those eyes on him whenever possible, however possible, and no matter what he was doing never let up all these years. He loved the feeling of those eyes dragging over him, the shivers it always sent down his spine, and he knew that this was going to be something special for him to remember happily on. He bent down to make sure there were no cats under the bed, popping up to throw open the closet doors to make sure there were no sleeping cats there and dashed around the bed to the bathroom to double check.
Even going as far as to pull the shower curtain out of the way to make sure there wasn't a cat sitting behind it. His breaths were hitching lightly, randomly when he found himself rushing out of the bathroom and nearly stumbling over his feet once again in his rush, but it was the excitement that reared up again that had him wheezing out. It was nauseatingly strong, forcing him to sit on the edge of the bed.
Rubbing his palms against his thighs a few times focusing on those breaths through his nose, out through his mouth, his heart thudding softly in his ears as he then swallowed. Like he could shove down that nauseous feeling. Why was this getting him so worked up? Was this how Hizashi had felt countless times? With the car? With the humping? When he had pissed himself? The shibari?
How many times had Hizashi felt this, and he was only now feeling it this intensely? He rubbed his palms harder against his thighs, dragging his nails over the fabric of his pajama bottoms as they rolled and folded up beneath the movements until he reached up to grab the edge of his tank top. It was a 'Put Your Hands Up!' tank top that his husband had brought home for himself but something that Shouta had worn one time when he'd spilled something on one of his.
That then went from Hizashi insisting he borrow it only for it to become Shouta's permanently. Claimed it looked better on him that it did on the blonde was all he heard whenever he wore it and his husband saw him in it. He needed to get ready. He told Hizashi he'd get ready. First order of business, he needed to open the top drawer. He pushed himself up dropping the hem of his tank top as he forced his legs forward in long strides that carried him quickly to the dresser.
Standing in front of it, he lifted the cable box for the tiny key they kept taped underneath it and he pulled it off the bottom with a quiet ripping sound of the tape then set the box back down. While they hadn't been so cautious in the past, often having their drawer ready to fling open if they so desired, since taking in not only Hitoshi but Eri on top of it the men had agreed to have a lock installed on the drawer to keep it shut and a key made for the both of them to use if they so needed too or one got lost.
The one in his fingers, of course, was the original key though they had a spare that they kept taped underneath their bathroom sink in that right corner; a spot that fingers wouldn't go to naturally at first. He pulled the tape off of the key, folding the strip together before placing it on the dresser top as he then bent just a bit to see the lock as he slid the key in. He twisted, his heart jumping at the quiet click, and he then tugged it open letting out a breath.
He and Hizashi's sex toy collection wasn't anything to write home about nor was it really impressive by anyone's standards or expectations. They had exactly four dildos together, one Hizashi bought privately, and one Shouta had bought, the one from college that the blonde had handed to him during their breakup when he'd come to apologize and then one obscenely large one that Hizashi favorited.
Loved even. While the blonde wasn't crazy about bottoming, he admitted to using a dildo if he really needed too or was merely just curious, he claimed it was different using a dildo on himself and actually bottoming with such conviction that Shouta never thought to contradict the blonde. How could he when he'd topped himself and knew he preferred bottoming? If Hizashi wanted to use a dildo when he was in the mood, then he wasn't going to argue.
If his husband could easily use dildos on himself but didn't want to bottom then he didn't care. It was like with a lesbian; just because they use dildos or strap-on's with one another it didn't mean they wanted an actual man, or the dick attached to said man. Just because Hizashi liked to use one didn't mean he was labeled as a bottom that most assumed him to be. Other than those dido's they had exactly five anal plugs- well, six now.
The five were regular ones that had they -no, Hizashi had bought in a damn sex store with the recommendations of going bigger from the worker, so it looked like they had come in a set that gradually got bigger. And then, of course, they had that cat tail plug that sat curled up waiting for its use again someday with the cat ears right next to it and the collar still sitting there like some kind of crown waiting to be slipped on.
Tempting. And then they had three vibrators between them, three that they shared between each other, a bottle of toy cleaner that they used to douse the items in when they were done with until Shouta was satisfied that they were positively, one hundred percent, clean. He personally could use a dildo any day but vibrators? Oh, those were something else. He loved using a vibrator if he could, loved how many settings one alone could have though his favorite was the obnoxiously bright yellow one that sat there like some kind of temptation like the pieces of his pet play.
He bit at his lip for a second letting his gaze fly over the toys, the gag that was sitting there, and he felt his heart squeezing in his chest it seemed while his stomach fluttered once again giving him a one-two hit that left him feeling like this alone was going to make him fall to the floor under its weight. So much excitement couldn't be good for a man, could it? For anyone really. He took a deep breath, his hand hovering above the drawer with a light tremble when he reached down picking up his personal favorite toy.
It was, after all, the dildo he had bought with Hizashi and Hizashi only in mind during those early years after they just started with penetration. Sometimes Hizashi, in those days, was out all night on Hero work or had just begun his show at the radio station so it left Shouta often in bed at night, impatiently waiting for the blonde to hopefully come home and pent up with his own needs, his own wants and desires that drove him batty.
So, he went online and bought the closest thing he could find that even somewhat resembled Hizashi's dick. Of course, there was no seven and a half inches that he could find so he settled for a mere seven inches as eight was far too big at the time. However, no matter how old this thing was it was his favorite simply from the memories associated with it and the nostalgic feeling it gave him.
Sure, it might be weird to have a nostalgic feeling over a damn dildo, but he always assumed everyone had nostalgic feelings for their first sex toy. He knew Hizashi did; after all the very first one they ever acquired and owned was from Nemuri who had handed them a small bullet vibrator that she had bought Shouta for his eighteenth birthday with the loud claim that she had been waiting for this day.
She even went so far as to pretend to wipe a tear away. Of course he refused it at first only for Hizashi to accept it in his place and as far as he knew it was very well loved by the blonde who had come to him one day lamenting that it wouldn't work anymore, no matter how many times he changed the new batteries for different ones as he was convinced it was just him being stupid. He'd even done it in front of Shouta, grinding the bottom down as he twisted it into place in the tight position it needed to be in.
And then, when he fiddled with that little knob, they'd gotten nothing. The blonde had pouted and wailed dramatically over the death of his vibrator when Shouta had chucked it into the trash and then without so much as batting an eye, he'd promised to buy Hizashi something better someday. And that vibrator was sitting right there, a rich and deep purple that the blonde happily used every once in a while.
He gripped the dildo in his hand tightly as he forced himself out of his thoughts with a shake of his head, snapping the drawer shut then hesitated; he really didn't need to lock it right now and it would be a pain in the ass to get up to unlock it when they could just pull the drawer open when he was done. After all, Eri wasn't going to wake out of a dead sleep, run downstairs and yank open the drawer open.
After all, it wasn't going to crash through the doors to show off a collection that had nothing to do with him to Denki or any of his friends the moment he refused to lock it. He pressed his fingers against the shut drawer for a few moments, the key pinched tight between his fingers dragged lightly over the wood, before he placed it on top of the dresser. They'd lock it later; he knew they would.
He was taking a deep breath then letting it out to soothe that excitement when it jumped right back up choking him under its overwhelming presence, his eyes flying to look at the doors that were grinding open with a hissing, squirting sound that Hizashi always managed to pitch just right to keep the cats away. He slid into the room with a backward step then shut the doors, flipped the little lock, and spun to face Shouta.
It was still for just a second before them; Shouta standing there with a damn dildo in his hand and Hizashi pressed to the doors with his hands tucked behind him no doubt between his ass and the door. Staring. Shouta opened his mouth to speak but what did he say? It wasn't even a big deal given what they were about to do, though he felt a strange urge to defend himself in why he wasn't actually ready yet, but Hizashi cut him off.
"Um, so I didn't think before I came here. Do I need to get a chair? To, uh, sit? Or do you want me on the bed with you?"
"Get a chair."
He tried for a tired, demanding tone though perhaps the breathlessness to his voice didn't help one bit as he squeezed his fingers tightly around that stupid dildo that he was still holding and Hizashi nodded then twisting to face the doors again unlocking the doors he'd just locked, slipped them open and slid out quickly blocking a cat from dashing in as he slid the doors shut. His breath rushed out of him though this prompted him to move so he could actually be ready for when Hizashi came back.
He rushed over to the bed, fighting the urge to just throw the toy on the bed and instead gripped it tightly as he opened the bedside drawer grabbing the lube, the packet of wipes but then hesitated as he looked down at the condoms for a speculative moment. Were they going to need them? Or would it strictly be a watching situation? He bit his lip, dragging his teeth over it again and again before shutting the drawer and turning to the bed.
He then looked at the toy in his hand; where did he put it? He wasn't going to toss it on the bed and risk getting cat hair all over it but he needed to put it somewhere so he could get undressed. When he turned, he knew Hizashi was going to absolutely die when he saw it, but he had no other choice. He slammed the bottom of the dildo down on the bedside table hard enough that it stuck to the wood, wobbling lightly from the force with which it was brought down.
Working quickly he pulled out the wipes, the lube, onto the bed quickly as he reached for the hem of his tank top. He yanked the fabric up over his head, tossing it behind him hearing it hit something whether it was the bedroom wall or the closet doors he didn't know, but he needed to move. He was shoving down his boxers with his pajama pants when the sound of something hitting the doors had him looking over at the sound.
He could hear Hizashi hissing, the sound far more menacing than it needed to be as the doors opened and the sound came to him clearly now as the blonde backed into the room with a chair in his hands jerking it towards their cats like they were a damn group of lions ready to pounce on him. He reached forward against the back of the chair to get the doors shut quickly with a slam that made him twitch.
The blonde then grunted quietly leaning forward to flip the lock with the tip of his finger before sighing as he pushed away from the chair. He grabbed the back to turn towards Shouta, then tilting his head to the right. Then to the left. Again, and again. He wanted to snap that he was going to shake his hearing aids out if he wasn't careful, the blonde then twisting his head to look around the room like he was lost.
Like he'd never seen it before, and he raised his brows when the blonde looked at him. He finished pushing the clothing down his legs, stepping out of them, then turning to face Hizashi who looked him over. From the top of his head, all the way down to his toes though and when they came back up, they definitely gawked shamelessly at him when they reached his waist. His hips, his flaccid dick, his stomach then up to his chest and the hands he was placing on his waist as he raised his brows trying not to show, trying not to squirm, under that look.
Held himself self still so Hizashi wouldn't see just how much he actually liked having that gaze raking over him. Then Hizashi blinked pulling his gaze up from his groin when he felt himself twitch, something he realistically had no hopes of stopping yet he wished just a bit he could, and those eyes were blown open again. Excited. "Where do I put the chair? Where will you be on the bed?"
"Anywhere. I can lay anywhere on the bed but angle myself towards you no matter where you sit."
He fidgeted from foot to foot before turning to the bedside table, the blonde watching his movements only to snicker at the sight of the dildo standing there and the light pop as it was pulled off of the bedside table, were all things Shouta had been expecting when he slammed it down there. His heart was loud, it was so loud, and he didn't know how his husband's hearing aids didn't pick it up with how thunderous the sound was in his own ears as it slammed against his chest pumping tingling's of heat through his veins as quickly as his blood.
He swallowed when he pressed his knee up onto the bed before hopping up crawling over the sheets making sure not to drop the dildo anywhere, he saw hair only to realize there was no hope of that; they had cat hair everywhere on the bed and he should have used the lint roller before he did anything. He wobbled on his knees as Hizashi placed the chair down at the edge of the bed sitting down in it, the wood creaking lightly, though he seemed to understand Shouta's plight for he held his hand out making him look over.
"I'll hold it for ya, baby! I'll keep it clean, make sure no hair gets on it, and you can take it from me when you're ready for it." Hizashi smiled as he spoke though his eyes were glinting, little sparks of heat flashing at him threatening to flame and smolder at a moment's notice making him shiver at the sight with another twitch from his dick making those eyes flick down briefly before coming back up.
He reached over placing the toy in his husband's waiting hand, his face hotter than he would have liked, yet the blonde lightly bobbed his h and before nodding as he held it securely with the bottom pressing against his pants looking for all the world like he had a dick growing out of his thigh. It nearly sent Shouta into hysterical laughter. Nearly. "So, how do you want to do this? Do you just want to pretend I'm not here? Or do you want me to tell you what I see? Or do you just want me to keep my mouth shut while you do this? Do you want me to talk in general?"
Ah, he had thought of this a million times, yet his brain was blanking on him. What did he want to do? How did he want to do this? It was his choice, his selection of the kink that just so happened to possibly be one of his own, yet he was struck wordless as his lips trembled with those silent words that were mangled. Incoherent if he'd vocalized them. He just needed to piece a coherent sentence together and tell his husband what he wanted them to do.
He knew the main element of all this was to have him watch but to add other little things in? Was that thrilling or overwhelming? "No, pretending you're not here isn't going to help and it's not what this is a-about. I didn't read a lot about it other than it needing to be consensual between partners before doing it, which should have been the first step and I'm an idiot to have not asked it properly, but do you want to do this, Zashi? Is this-"
"Absolutely, I do! Now I'm gonna throw that back at you and ask you the same thing! Do you want to do this, baby?" He pointed a look at the blonde who smiled at him still, squirming in his seat like an overexcited puppy in the fact of a treat being dangled before him.
"Of course, I do. I'm the one who asked you!" He snapped as he settled into a sitting position on the blankets, swallowing down that excitement that threatened to become that sickening intensity as he shifted, reaching for the lube, letting out a slow breath. "So, you can talk. T-Tell me what you see when you deem fit, and you can be quiet if you want to but don't look away. Whatever you do, whatever you say, no matter what angle you switch too, do not take your eyes off of me for anything, okay? Just make sure that I know you're looking at me."
"Sounds easy enough to me! I can one hundred percent do that for ya, baby! Anything else?"
He then bit his lip, dragging his teeth over it slowly before releasing it as he squirmed. He took a deep breath when he gestured to the chair, his cheeks far hotter than he would have liked. "And you don't have to stay there in the chair. You can get up and walk around to look if you want a di-different angle. I don't mind."
"Got it!" Hizashi's head bobbed so fervently it was nearly comedic in its movement, his glasses nearly flying off of his nose with the movement and he had to nudge them back up before adjusting the frames behind his ears when his eyes flared at him making him shiver again at the look when those lashes quivered lightly as he looked over Shouta's face. "So, uh, I guess go at it! Do what you do when you're alone! Don't be nervous or nothing, just think of it as-as something else! I can talk to you normally if you want?"
"Whatever you think is best, Zashi. Just spit out whatever comes to your mind, it's what you do anyways."
"Okay! Oh! I can put on music if that helps too! Given I won't be doing anything other than watching and talking, the least I can do is make things easier for you to get into it, baby! You know I won't judge what you do and besides, I've always been curious about how you masturbate on your own so think of it as showing me! Let me see what you do to make yourself feel good!"
His head was spinning with the words of his husband. He could pinpoint each question if he so desired, yet it made his head absolutely SPIN with the realization that he was going to do this; he was doing this and Hizashi was finally going to be watching him do it. He was going to have those eyes on him, not during sex, but away from him and watching him intensely seeing every little movement he made that the blonde had only felt when they were twisted together, and it was just so-!
"Um, put music on. Not too loud, not too quiet, you know the drill."
He got a wink from the blonde as he pulled his phone out of his pocket pulling up his Spotify, hopping out of the chair with that dildo in his hand like it was a trophy or bat that he would use any moment to flog someone and it made him want to snicker at the sight as the blonde placed the phone in the dock. It took a moment to not only connect but for the playlist to start up and he glared at his husband when the song kickstarted.
"You're fucking kidding me."
"Shhh, it's not what we're settling on! Don't get fussy, baby! I'm changing it!"
"The fact you have 'Insane in the Brain' on any playlist is fucking ridiculous."
"Shut up, it's a good song! Sometimes it's fitting!"
He snickered when the blonde gained that huffy, defensive tone that was a welcome reprieve from the excitement that was making him shake lightly as he fidgeted in his spot, his hands scratching his thighs and his feet wiggled against the sheets with that excitement. The arousal that was beginning to weave through him slowly. He raised a brow with a scoffing laugh when the blonde changed the song, the music low yet easily recognizable and the blonde turned to him raising his own brows back at the black-haired man.
"What? There's nothing wrong with this one!"
"It's from the Fifty Shades of Grey of soundtrack, Zashi!"
"It's a good song! Sexy and good! 'Meet Me In The Middle' by Jessie Ware is not a bad song! Now get to it, chop chop! I can see you shaking, so I know you want to start really bad, baby, so go. Don't let me hold you back just because I'm here for once."
Hizashi plopped back down in the chair, leaning forward pressing his knees to his elbows as he smiled at him, his hands becoming fists to support his chin and even if the damn dildo was under his chin, it was the heat in his eyes that had Shouta's breath hitching audibly this look that despite his cheerful, playful words that he was just as eager for it. Just as excited to watch as Shouta was to have those eyes on him.
"Come on, baby, it's okay. Even if you don't want to, just pretend I'm not here right now. I've said it a million times, but I won't judge you and I won't even criticize how you do it either! Everyone has a different way to go about masturbation, about touching themselves, and I won't give one fuck about how you start. So please? Show me?"
Show him? He swore his heart was throbbing under those beats as he could promise, swear on his life as well that he felt the blood in his veins rushing down, down, down. His legs were shaking lightly yet he shifted slightly, his stomach wasn't squeezing nor was it fluttering but like some awful amalgamation of both leaving him shaking from the intensity of the lust that was beginning to boil in his veins.
Shaking from the excitement flaring inside of him until he felt he'd start gasping. And he hadn't even started anything yet. Just those eyes on him, the fact that he was going to do this, was making all kinds of emotions flare and burst inside him indistinguishably yet he found himself locked onto Hizashi's gaze for just a moment. A nod. He let out a slow breath as he let his eyes shut, lashes fluttering against his cheeks that felt all too hot for his liking, and he stretched out his fingers before sliding them up his thighs in stuttering little movements.
Up his hips, over his stomach that quivered beneath his fingers fervently, up his ribs and he let out another breath as he brushed his palms over his nipples lightly. Back and forth, drifting his palms across them before shifting his hands to rub his thumbs over softer portion of his areolas before circling them inwards until he was flicking them over his nipples lightly, not too hard, not too firm.
Not yet. He was strangely battling against the excitement that whispered for more, more, more, to give more and give Hizashi something worth watching. And there was a part of him that felt like stiffening up, freezing with those eyes on him despite how badly he wanted them. Again, his brain may say he wanted it, the fantasies made him want it, but it felt different in reality. He heard the wood of the chair creak quietly as Hizashi shifted his weight no doubt though he didn't open his eyes.
No, he couldn't do it yet. A few more moments. He began rubbing the pads of his thumbs against his nipples before shifting his hands to lightly drift his fingers over them before pinching the right one lightly. He lightly twisted back and forth, a hitch in his breath ringing out at the little tingles it sent down to his groin, his heard pounding underneath his hand and yet he pinched a little tighter, twisted a little bit harder before he finally felt his nipple hardening in the grip.
He tried to multitask in pinching, twisting at his right nipple while drifting his fingers over the left one that perked up eagerly beneath the touch those that was a little harder than he initially thought it would be. He swallowed as he fought the urge to open his eyes; not yet. He wasn't ready to make eye contact yet. Odd how a look, a single fraction of attention being called to the sensation of eyes on a person could quickly feel like a physical touch the longer it lingered.
He couldn't see, not yet, though he could feel the eyes moving over him from his hands right down to his hips, his face, his skin tingling with the arousal pooling into his stomach as he took a deep breath. It wasn't this hard in his mind. It wasn't strangely vulnerable in those little fantasies. He wondered, for just a moment, if Hizashi was still leaning forward like he had been before he shut his eyes, if his eyes were smoldering or burning.
If they were bright or dark with their respective emotions. If his lips were parted with his own quiet breaths. He didn't want to feel the embarrassment at the twitch his erection gave as the tip rested up against his lower stomach, his stomach squirming excitedly at the prospect of his next move. He felt like this should be a part in some scandalous movie. Some stupid movies that had to be rated M for a sex scene that would fade away long before anything could happen between the two main characters.
Only for the implication to be there as the camera came back later to limbs tangled together, hair mussed, and sheets laid scantily across hips. It fucking felt like it. He moved his fingers to pinch at his left nipple tightly, jerking at the burst of pain though he didn't mind it; not the way he should have. He let out a breathy little sound as he lightly tugged, pinching down tight until he whined at the pain throbbing beneath his fingers and only then did, he let his hands do what they were twitching to do; slide down.
He knew in those moments he did masturbate he'd always imagined Hizashi; how he would move his hands down slowly, fingers fanning out against his skin, taking their time in how they went down to his waist pausing to drag his nails across the skin until he was twitching. His breath hitched in a soft, eager gasp that then rushed out as his hands moved subconsciously to mimic that train of thought and he dragged his own nails lightly over his waist listening to his breath shudder out before racing in just as fast as he slid his hands down to his hips.
Hips that -had they been Hizashi's hands- would knead and squeeze gently until he then slid along the subtle shape of them with the tips of his fingers. He would then, once again, use those painted nails to drag lightly at the skin before sliding down to his thighs, curling inwards to the sensitive inner skin there until they trembled. With his eyes closed it was almost like it was Hizashi's hands on him.
He could almost fool himself into thinking the blonde was behind him, sliding his slender hands over him which were still surprisingly soft, and he could almost pretend the rougher hands on his skin weren't his own. But that's not what this was about, now was it? He knew those eyes were tracking his hands, watching to see where they would go next, and he felt the corner of his lips twitch when he heard Hizashi's breath hitch inwards only for it to be held down.
A moment of silence from him as Shouta's breaths shuddered out of him, his lashes trembling against his cheeks as he moved his left hand up his thigh, across his hip and wrapping those fingers around his erection. Then he opened his eyes. That face, that expression, it was everything he'd wanted. Everything he could have hoped for and more. He whimpered softly to himself at the sight of those blonde brows tugged tightly together, the red blush glowing beneath those smatterings of freckles.
Even his hands still tucked under his jaw though his mouth was dropped open just a bit, his eyes locked right onto his hand. Not moving. Not flinching away. They were positively burning as they watched with a ravenous edge to them, the fascination on his husband's face was quickly being tainted by one of absolute hungry lust that had him shivering at the sight of. He wasn't even jiggling his leg the way he normally would if he was forced to sit in a chair for long periods of time.
He was still, very still in fact, like he was holding every muscle taut with the refusal to move a single inch as those eyes stared shamelessly at him. Gawking. No, would ogling be a better word? He loved it. He fucking loved it. All he ever wanted, all he ever needed and desired, was for those eyes to be on him somehow whether it was with affection, or with love, or with kindness or with that friendly disposition or with the heat of lust and the burn of hunger he didn't care.
He only wanted those eyes on him as he watched Hizashi just as intently. His eyes were always drawn to him whether that was because of his brightly colored outfits, the leather he often wore that was form fitting, the way his hair fell or his bright voice calling to him, he didn't know what caused it but if he was in the room then his eyes would find him somehow. He never thought he could be so painfully aware of someone the way he was with Hizashi.
But to know that he had those eyes on him now, had them on him more often than he assumed, had him shaking with the surge of emotion washing through him threatening to choke him. He shivered when he began moving his hand, stroking slowly and letting out a huffing little breath as those eyes burned at him before flicking up to his face making him pinch his lips together to muffle the whine, he knew would come out embarrassingly loud.
Knew he needed to speed things up a bit, especially if he wanted to use the toy held tightly in Hizashi's hand, but he couldn't. Hizashi had said to do as he would if he were alone, and this is what he did. Slow. Easy. He didn't like to rush when he was alone so why should he now? Even if he wanted to rush things up, wanted to use that toy on himself for Hizashi to see, he wanted to work up to it. To take his time like he would if this was any other night of touching himself.
Because if Hizashi wanted him to do as he normally would when he was alone then he would do just that. He rubbed at the base when his hand slid down making a low hum leave him when he slid his hand upwards rubbing his thumb against the tip idly until a sigh slid out of him. Up and down, slowly kneading, rubbing idly, squeezing with just enough pressure that his knees spread wider along the sheets, his right-hand twitching against his thigh.
Ah, he had a free hand? A free hand. He didn't do it often, didn't see much of a need too when he was with Hizashi, but on his own? That was a different story. If he wanted to razzle dazzle it, make it a bit spicier or a bit more pleasurable, then he would do something simple like this though now it felt scandalous. Erotic even to himself. He reached his right hand down feeling a burst of excitement when he watched those burning eyes widen with awe, with fascination, his gaze flicking up for just a brief second before flying back down as if he couldn't bear to miss a second.
Not one. He moved his hand to cup his balls, massaging gently at first, rubbing with the pads of his fingers drawing a moan out of himself which was echoed by the quiet groan from Hizashi sending shivers down his back. He moved his left hand faster, nothing wild, but rather with intent as he rhythmically squeezed his hand and began twisting it slightly as he stroked, curving it making another whimper fly out of him as those greedy, lustful eyes never left him.
Like they were physically incapable of moving away from the sight of his hands moving, working together in their stroking and massaging movements until his next moan was flying out of him, much louder than the last. He shifted his head to the side, looking over his shoulder looking for the lube only to huff out an irritated breath that he put it all the way back by the pillows which meant he would have to stop.
He'd have to stop and grab it. He groaned quietly as he forced his hands to stop, pulling them away listening to a rather disappointed sounding groan leaving his husband as he leaned backwards on his right hand and reaching out with his left to grab the tube. He knew he could jump right back into it, place the lube by his thigh, but he could always do it later. He shifted his position, moving his legs from out from underneath himself and spreading them open hoping that Hizashi wouldn't mistake the shaking as nervousness; he wasn't in the slightest bit.
There wasn't a drop of that emotion in him, nowhere to be found, and he popped open the cap of the lube then squeezed out a dollop. He placed it down within reaching distance, knowing he was going to need it very, very soon and began spreading the lubricant over his fingers meeting that burning gaze directly; challenging the blonde to move. To touch him. He could see that desire in those eyes of his but there was also the fascination, the awe that had been there when he opened his eyes moments ago.
Just that look alone told him what he exactly what he already knew. That Hizashi wouldn't move a muscle to touch him until he said so. Sure, he had told him pacing around the bed, changing his angle to watch as he pleased was allowed, he hadn't said Hizashi could touch, and they both knew that it had been implied loud and clear. He may look but he may not touch. His lips trembled with the urge to say something, whether it was those words expressly or something else he had no clue.
Then he leaned onto his right hand listening to Hizashi's breath hitch in only to come out on a fast gasp that rushed out as those eyes widened again. He leaned forward in his chair making the wood groan lightly, His fists pressed against his lips as he took shallow, fast breaths through his nose, yet his eyes never wavered. He let out a puff of air, echoing the little gasp Hizashi had released.
He swallowed before reaching down and with a little wiggling, he slid his slick fingers between his cheeks to rub at his hole gathering a rather quick traction against himself that made a quiet slick sound. A sound that, if outside of the room, wouldn't be heard over the music playing. He didn't know what was playing now, didn't care to know, as those eyes were staring at his fingers like he had no choice- no, not like he had no choice but as if there had never even been a choice to begin with.
He rubbed his fingers against himself once more before he took a deep breath, and he saw lashes moving in a fast blink as they then flicked up to his face for a literal nanosecond before flying right back down to their view between his legs. It was fucking amazing. How did he never ask for this before? How did they never do this before? Maybe, all this time, he really had been an exhibitionist of some kind.
He twitched as he pushed the first finger into himself listening to rush of a sharp inhale from his husband as a gasped flew out of him, pushing that finger in as deep as he could and held his hand still while the rest of him trembled in little bursts that took their time moving over him. He couldn't look away from Hizashi's face any more than the blonde could look away from him with that rapt look of aroused fascination. His lips trembled lightly before he managed to speak.
"Z-Zashi?"
"Mmm? What's up? You okay?"
Eyes lifted up to him, glazed with lust, making him shiver when they met his own and he wanted to reach out with his right hand to touch that red cheek just to feel the heat of it beneath his fingers with the same urge to coax Hizashi up above him so he could find those lips with his own. Yet his own arousal, his own lust, refused to let him break this fantasy. Wouldn't dare let him. His thighs twitched as he moved his finger in a lazy, circular little movement that went unnoticed by the blonde though he knew he'd tell him about it later.
Mention it. Though he had much better questions bubbling in his mind as he allowed himself to move his finger slowly, pulling and pushing in a lazy movement that had those eyes dropping down at the little slick sound it created, and he allowed a grin to curl over his lips. Such a cliché question but he had to ask it. Simply had too. "E-Enjoying the show so far?"
A laugh barked out of his husband though it was weak, nowhere near as strong as it could have been, and it still had goosebumps breaking out over his skin as chills ran over him at the sound leaving his husband. And he knew that while those eyes may be glued to the movement of his finger he also knew his husband had all of his attention on what he needed to say. He knew that look, he knew how Hizashi simply was, and he was excited to hear just what the blonde could say to a stupid, cliché question such as that one.
He watched the blonde lick his lips, the nearly inaudible sound of him swallowing, and his eyes then flicked up to his. "I fucking love it so far! Ten out of ten, one of the best shows I've seen in my whole damn life. Can't wait to get to the climax of it."
He could have laughed at the shitty phrasing, yet it merely had heat ripping, flaring and burning underneath his skin making a groan slid out of him instead of the snarky remark he wanted to make in response to his husband's words and those eyes moved right back down when he began moving that finger faster. Not wildly, nor in a frenzy, but a decent pace that had his thighs trembling and his arm quivering as it threatened to fall out from underneath him, yet he didn't care as those eyes were greedily watching the movement.
He was glad there was some type of background noise, so grateful, as he knew his shallow little puffs of a panting rhythm would have sounded far too loud in the quiet of the room and even then, he wouldn't have cared about it. He shifted his hand to nudge his middle finger next to his index, listening to the little moan he got from the blonde as he pressed until his finger was sliding in with that first one and he watched Hizashi squirm in his seat, shifting as if he wanted to lean back yet fought against it.
He thrusted his fingers into himself with the quick movements he'd started using, pushing in until his hand was pressing against himself and he rubbed the pads of his fingers against his inner walls looking. Searching. Trying to find it exactly. He thrust his fingers shallowly, just barely pulling back before pushing them back in as he panted quietly trying to find it because it had to be somewhere and he always found it so easily, Hizashi always found it easily, so it had to be-!
His cry was the loudest sound out of him yet, his body jerking when his fingers rubbed roughly against his prostate sending a jolt of pleasure up his spine that made him positively sizzle under the effect. He'd been looking, searching for it carelessly and the movement had been harder and firmer than he intended but goddamn if it didn't get him the reaction he wanted. His shaking arm gave out having him drop down onto his forearm, his legs spreading much wider to their maximum stretched out position.
He could feel the muscles along with those tendons in his arms pulling with the stretch as he thrusted his fingers eagerly as he kept his hand in place was amazing. Amazing. The quiet slick sounds of lube rang out perhaps more clearly for Hizashi given he was practically hovering between his legs though he could catch the quiet sounds every once in a while as he moved his fingers, jerking when he rubbed his fingers over his prostate until he was whining, moaning out louder each time he ground his fingers against the spot with an airy gasp following after.
He kept those rubs quick, brief before pulling away, only when he was alone, he was different about it and he looked at Hizashi's red, lustful face with eyes that refused to waver. Refused to look away for a single second and his mouth dropped open slightly despite the position of his fists still being under his chin. He smirked excitedly, knowing the blonde was absolutely getting off on this perhaps just as hard as himself, and yet he knew the blonde would really love this.
After all, he did say to touch himself as if he were alone. And this was what he did alone though he had to admit he was trying to exaggerate just a bit. A tiny bit. He pulled his fingers back before shoving them in finding his prostate and griding his fingers against the spot fiercely pulling a moan from himself that was echoing quietly down between his legs and rather than pulling away he kept his fingers in place.
Grinding, rubbing in those back-and-forth movements that had his fingers moving subtly against his entrance to hint at the movement and then he would rub in circles that had him jerking. Twitching like he was electrocuting himself. His moans flew out of him, growing higher in pitch until he was sure that any other time, they'd be embarrassingly loud, and he'd die from embarrassment over the notion of them leaving his throat, but he didn't care. Couldn't care.
He alternated between those fierce circling movements then the back and forth that had him squirming against the sheets with a whimper flying out of him, his head falling backwards as he panted quickly with the jolts rushing down his legs threatening to lose the stability his feet provided. He whined impatiently with himself, almost as he would if it were Hizashi's fingers, and so he began thrusting them again though the pace was fast, rough making that quiet slick sound much louder from his movements as he began flexing his fingers outwards.
The second he did it, pushing his fingers out, Hizashi whimpered making him straighten his head up curiously to find the blonde leaning forward until his arms threatened to cross over the sheets though he stopped himself from doing so, those lashes quivering in fast blinks that he barely process until they were over. He shivered at the thought that those little blinks were made to soothe not only the dryness in the blonde's eyes but so he wouldn't miss anything.
He pushed at himself fiercely, his holding the position until his fingers trembled and Hizashi was whining with another squirming movement making his lips tilt up into a wide smirk. It lasted a full second before it dropped when he pressed his fingers together to thrust inwards and rubbing just below that sensitive spot of his making his hips jump up at the unintentional action. He focused, rather than on thrusting alone, on scissoring his fingers out just as often as his thrusts.
Loved the little breathless sounds he got form his husband each time he scissored his fingers. He wondered if that temptation was there. If Hizashi wanted to climb on top of him as well, to touch and kiss him like they would during moments like these. And it made him whimper at the thought, the mere idea that Hizashi was keeping himself held so tightly to avoid doing that, his eyes glued to him as if to make up for that urge alone.
He rolled his hips each time he thrusted his fingers, a movement he didn't think twice about and every bit as instinctive as any other reaction. The moan he got from Hizashi had him whimpering as he pushed in to find his prostate again. Once he found it, he began rubbing those tight little circles against the spot making him jerk at the bursts of pleasure it sent throughout him until his hips moved in time with those little circular movements of his fingers.
He wanted to say it was easy to forget that those eyes were on him and easy to forget there was someone else there with him yet that would be a lie. A horrible lie he wouldn't be able to choke out convincingly enough. His body, his foggy mind, was painfully aware that Hizashi was sitting mere inches away in that chair that creaked lightly when he moved a certain way, and those eyes were on him were just as physical as any touch of his hands could be.
He had to admit, there were moments when he was excited and unbearably worked up but this? Oh, this had him going. He couldn't even categorize the sensation in his stomach as it was far from squeezing or fluttering movements but some awful amalgamation of both that had his heart racing to add to the absolute sickening excitement, the scalding lust, and the hyperawareness running through him.
It was amazing, it was awful. He wanted it to stop, he wanted it to continue. He scissored his fingers out feeling that impatience welling up inside him again, choking him just as much as that excitement had, and he pushed fiercely at the much looser muscles as his brain deemed it good enough. Not as tight as before nor as loose as it would be afterwards, but he'd loosened up just enough that it wouldn't be painful or uncomfortable to use the toy in Hizashi's hand.
His fingers trembled lightly as he pushed, pushed, pushed before bringing them together and sliding them out pushing himself back up into a sitting position as he reached with his slick fingers to grab the lube again. He turned to his husband who had groaned in protest when he pulled those digits out but when he held his hand out for the toy, he watched those eyes widen a fraction before he straightened up with hopeful look to his face, the quiet panting of his hitched and froze as Shouta wiggled his fingers impatiently.
"Gi-Give me it!"
The blonde handed it over wordlessly, blinking a few times as if to soothe the ragged itch that Shouta knew he had from gawking so long, and those fingers came up to slid beneath his glasses to scrub at them fiercely as if to help dampen them to which he waited. He could have slicked up the toy, gotten it in position while his husband did that, but he wouldn't. He couldn't. He wanted Hizashi to see everything he did and if lubing up a fucking dildo was part of that then he'd wait until those eyes were on him again.
When Hizashi slid his fingers from beneath the frames of his glasses he blinked a few times, rolling his eyes just as many times before settling on Shouta again curiously to find that the black-haired man hadn't moved an inch. It was only when those eyes were back on him did he pop the cap to the lube with his nails, fingers curled tightly around the dildo tightly to keep from dropping it, and he then squirted a dollop onto his palm awkwardly with the stretch of those fingers the best he could before dropping it to the bed.
He then began rubbing the lube over the toy, twisting his hand as he did so and rubbing his palm against, the tip then sliding back down all while watching Hizashi's face; the way his positively burned, staring hungrily at the movement of his hand, and he found himself smirking again. A lazy pull of the corner of his lips as he curled his hand around and over the toy until he was satisfied that it was as lubed up and covered as he could possibly get it without using an obscene amount.
His pants hitched with the excitement that reared up when he leaned back down on his forearm, his heart slamming sickeningly fast, hard against his chest until he felt that his very body was throbbing in time with those beats as he adjusted his legs to make sure he had a truly stable leverage under his feet. Readjusted his legs into that wide position after closing them for just a second then letting them fall open again.
Those panting breaths hitched, hissing in and out of him far faster than he ever thought possible, yet they only sped until they were ragged, scratchy in quality when he heard a similar pace leaving his husband. Those pants were cresting louder than the soft music, so incredibly loud, as Hizashi leaned forward eagerly in his seat staring with that same excitement Shouta could feel searing its way through his veins.
He reached down wriggling the toy between his cheeks much like he had with his fingers, rubbing the tip against his hole provoking a twitch that had him moaning breathlessly with that excitement that was actively strangling him. Squeezing his throat made it hard for those panting breaths to fly down to his lungs. He sucked in a breath, holding it down in his lungs when he pressed forward against himself with a shaking hand and his teeth sank into his lip sending a jolt of pain from the action, yet he could hardly focus on that.
Couldn't focus on it when he pressed hard, shoving against himself and shouting when the toy pushed in sliding in quickly due to the slickness that still covered his hole from his fingers combined with the lube on the toy but either way it gave him what he wanted. He breathed out only for his panting to resume with as much intensity, as much pace as Hizashi's was as the blonde released a high keening moan that shook on its way out making him tremble.
He let the toy sink in until the tips of his fingers were just barely touching him, and he gasped in a breath as his head spun. It was a useless thing, only marveling that he was doing it. He was living that fantasy and it was so much better than he ever could have expected. He hadn't really been aware his eyes had fluttered shut, hadn't known he needed to, until the chair's creaking had his eyes opening lazily to stare at Hizashi.
The blonde's eyes were devouring every inch of him, flicking from his face along his chest and down his stomach, to his shaking legs and the hand down between his legs with such an intense look of lust, of such hunger, that he shivered at the look alone. He whimpered when his husband shifted n the chair, moving backwards to lean against the back of it, his legs crossing as he stared at him like he really was the most enrapturing thing he'd ever had the pleasure of seeing in his life and it made heat burn through his very veins.
Made his blood scald as it rushed through him. That background noise seemed to drown under the sound of their racing breaths, his chest raising and falling just as quickly as Hizashi's with those fast breaths. He closed his mouth to swallow, to soothe the ragged itch in his throat, then he gave in to the quiet urge that was cresting louder, louder, and shrieking until he allowed his hand to finally move. Pulling and pushing that toy with those eyes on him had to be the absolute highlight of his year.
No, maybe his life? He didn't know which was more fitting as he moved the toy slowly in shallow thrusts that Hizashi himself had performed many, countless times before and he moaned when the blonde leaned forward again, legs bracing apart as his arms draped across his knees. He was so restless in his movements that Shouta thought of reiterating his offer to let him walk, to let him stare from any angle he placed but his words were flying out as another moan as he grew confident.
Grew bold in his movements. The thrusting rapidly sped up making his breaths huff out shallowly in those quick pants, his hand moving with that sense of urgency that had begun whispering quietly for harder, faster, to be rougher with himself. He always got far too impatient with himself. He wondered just how he had to look at that moment to his husband. Was it as erotic as he hoped? Was it better than watching a random masturbation video on some porn sight?
He felt like he was being watched intently like he had not only directed, written the script for it, but was also starring in some kind of video of his own creation. A fantasy come to life. Like he was being watched with that same amount of lust, of hunger, of desire and the raw want as anyone would posses when watching a favorite porn star. He was drowning in the sensations, in the thoughts, as his hips jerked to meet the movements of his hand with a whimper flying out of him as he threw his head back breaking his view of Hizashi.
His hair tickled down his back from the position, his huffing pants much louder as his jaw dropped allowing his mouth to open wider, and he pressed his feet along with his arm into the mattress to aid the movements of his hips. He never thought that he'd be doing something like this as confidently, as boldly, as he was. Never in a million years. Masturbation was a private thing, something he hadn't needed to be told by adults in those shitty little sex courses in school, he knew it was something that some people were ashamed of when found out.
That it was something embarrassing to some people. It was private, it wasn't spoken of, and it wasn't thought of until it was confronted head on by an embarrassing moment itself. And yet he had always, strangely enough, gotten off plenty of times at the thought of being caught. At the chance of someone watching him. It really said a lot about him as a person, didn't it? The fact that this hidden, quiet desire always managed to rear up only to be ignored for other things.
To force himself to ignore those fantasies, those ideas, in favor of finding other things just as thrilling to get off on. Perhaps that's why he got so into the car sex; why he had given in so easily once he was laid on that backseat. The fact that he'd been scared, naturally, that someone would come whipping down the road or God forbid they'd be found out, was terrifying. And yet his brain recalled now just how excited he'd been; as excited as Hizashi had been that once the moment was over and he had time to reflect on it.
His fear, his absolute anxiety, at the time were rational after all. While he may label himself as an exhibitionist in the bedroom where it would stay, there was something terrifying about being in public yet exciting at the same time though he knew he'd need much convincing to ever attempt something like that again. It was too risky, too much could backfire, and his reputation could be ruined if ever got caught like that.
Yet it didn't change the fact that even now he knew it had been exciting. Not as exciting, however, as having someone's eyes on him. Those green eyes burning into his skin, staring at every possible inch of him that he could see, raking over him making him shiver and whine at the sensation was exciting in a whole new way he hadn't been expecting. It was far better than his brain could have ever come up with.
That he could have ever hoped for, and he loved every goddamn second of it. His hand moved in time with his thoughts, the moan he expected to come out was a high trembling cry as he slammed the toy inwards and finally hit onto his prostate with the tip of it. And it had him jolting, his hips thrusting upwards eagerly as he adopted a rough, slamming pace that had him gasping with the moans from the chair flying out of Hizashi just as rapidly.
He could- What was that sound? Was it-? He forced his head up, his body lightly rocking with the movement of his hand and hips only to moan loudly at the sight that finally made sense with that sound that had caused a little spark of curiosity. Much like when they had watched the porn, their very first day of this damn challenge, Hizashi hadn't taken himself out but rather was rubbing his hand over the bulge of his erection, his legs spread apart as he leaned back in the chair.
His eyes were locked, shamelessly staring down at his hand and he shuddered with a wild whine flying out of him as he fought the urge to throw his head back again at the raw lust that ripped into him just as sharply as any blade could. It left him in tatters, it felt that they were fluttering apart every second. He honestly wished he had more hands; more hands to touch, to trace over his feverish skin and stroke his erection and while in reality he could do that it would require him lying on his back and that would cut off his view of his husband shamelessly gawking at him.
And he didn't want that; not yet. He slammed the toy, yanking it back roughly until his fingers along with his hand were hitting against himself and he was gritting his teeth at the pleasure that ripped up his spine each time he managed to hit his prostate though he didn't angle his hand, didn't angle the toy so it would strike that spot each time but rather kept it at its original position.
Something that allowed for a random hit to his prostate that had his toes curling and his stomach fluttering in excitement at when the next blistering wave would rush up his spine from a hit. He watched Hizashi's hips jump up to his hand, rutting shamelessly against the rubbing motions as his eyes finally flicked up to his own again. A moment, a heartbeat's length, when a wicked smirk curled over those lips.
What? What was that look for? "Shouta, baby, I-I could ask you if you k-know how fucking good you look but something t-tells me you already know, don't you?"
Ah, so he was starting that? He whimpered eagerly with a fast nod that had the blonde groaning before clearing his throat lightly. "I- God, the fact you do this alone i-is always going to stay in my mind! I'll always ha-have that image in my head no matter what we do, baby! Seeing you on this bed, with your legs s-spread as you play with your nipples, mo-move your hands down like you did to stroke yourself and p-play with your balls like that, it was ffffucking amazing! Nothin' co-compares to seeing yo-you fuck yourself on your fingers! Oh, God, I thought you'd make me fucking cum just by spreading your fi-fingers like that, stretching your hole so wide-!"
His cry that left him cut off whatever the blonde had been about to say, the absolute euphoric pleasure in that sound was like it had come from every inch of his body to produce it. His hand jerked faster, hitting against himself roughly as he wrenched the toy in and out fast as he could, his hips jerking to meet those movements frantically as his breath came in ragged gasps. His right arm moved instinctively, bending to brace his elbow to the mattress instead which had him rocking wildly with his motions due to the change in stability of his upper half.
He could feel his hair, annoying as it was, swaying around his shoulders and brushing the sides of his hot face as he moved himself quickly with a wild whimper as his hand reached for his chest pinching a nipple. He didn't know how much longer he could continue on like this without dissolving into a mess of wails, moans, groans and those wild keening whines and whimpers. He couldn't be closer to euphoria than he was that night with the rope.
He wished he didn't lose himself so quickly, didn't shed his tight control so easily but it was just that; easy. He kept himself in a tight, controlled manner day in and day out, snappish without meaning to be and yet this was the one thing he could do that allowed him to surrender that control. To be as vocal, as expressive as he could be, and it would be seen as rational. After all, no one could really keep a straight face during sex or masturbation, now could they?
He whimpered loudly when the tip hit against his prostate sending a wave up his spine that had him writhing, his jaw clenched tightly as the sound got out through his teeth and yet he unclenched it to speak the little words demanding to be spoken. "Z-Zashi, more! Ta-Talk more! Tell me, tell me, tell me! Tell me how fu-fucking good it looks!"
"So, fucking good!" He moaned at the way that his husband groaned those words back at him loudly, the sound from the blonde's hand rubbing at himself was just as loud as the lubricant that squelched and squeaked with the movement of the toy making him shiver delightfully when he closed his eyes. Needed too for just one second. "Baby, you have no idea how fucking good you look fucking yourself l-like that! I know how t-tight you must fucking be with how ex-excited you are! It's- Fuck! Shit, I love it! Love watching y-you!
"Ye-Yeah? It's that good? Mmm! Ke-Keeping talking! Tell me m-more about it! Ah! Ah! Please! Ho-How hhhot is it?"
"So ffffucking hot! I-I've never seen it really, not so cl-clear but it's so fucking hot! I can't- God, you're ma-making me jealous over a fucking dildo!" He whimpered opening his eyes to stare at the blonde again. "Jesus Christ, I always kn-knew your body was al-always ready to go d-during sex but not like that! Goddamn, Shouta, you have g-got to have the greediest fucking hole I've ever got to see! You put an-any porn video, any f-fffucking person in it to shame!"
"Yes! Yess, yes, yes, I do! Fucking yes! Zashi, Zashi! Fe-Feels just like you! Mmm, it's good! So good!"
"Yeah? Fe-Feels just like me? I dunno, baby, that greedy fucking hole of y-yours seems like it wants something more, doesn't it?"
He moaned with another fast nod when the blonde stood up on legs that trembled, his curiosity pricking for a moment when the blonde turned walking around the chair to the dresser. He paused in his thrusting, twisting desperately in place at the desperation that clenched him tightly the moment his movements stopped but much like earlier when he'd been lubing the damn thing up, he didn't want Hizashi to miss a second of it.
He tried to swallow again only for his jaw to drop with those ragged pants as he watched Hizashi pull open their top drawer with a breathless humming coming from the blonde as he squinted at his back. What was he going to pull out? A vibrator? Or one of the three other dildos? And if so which one? He shifted slightly, his thumb idly tracing his areola making the skin tingle eagerly, yet he refused to touch. Not yet. Then the blonde was turning around, his jaw dropping fully, his air flying out of him as he stared at the smiling blonde who held the- No. No fucking way.
"Hizashi Yamada, what the fu-!"
"Don't you want more? Don't you want to try to take it?" Hizashi's voice was a strange croon, like he was trying to coax the sudden surprise from Shouta as he walked over to him on those shaking legs before dropping into the chair again with that obscenely large dildo in his hand and that smile never wavering on his lips. "Sho, you've never tried it before, so why not try now when I'm watching? I'll be able to see you do it, I'll be able to watch and make sure you're okay while using it, so why not try it now?"
"Zashi! That thing is huge! How the f-fuck would it even fit"
"Shh, I won't push you to do it, if you're happy with the one you're using now then keep on using it! But I just thought that with someone as greedy, as positively euphoric as you are now, that you'd want me to watch you fucking wreck yourself on something like this! But it's up to you, baby, if you want to use it! No rush, just think, okay?"
Think? He wanted him to think? The fucking thing was nine inches long, the girth of it alone was something that would absolutely destroy him and- Oh. Oh. His husband's words clicked finally in his foggy brain, his eyes widening at the offer, the sinful temptation that finally occurred to him that his husband was offering. While Shouta was far from a size queen, Hizashi was in a weird way with his dildos.
The bigger it was the happier he could appear when he used it once in a blue moon, and sometimes Shouta had to admit that he was pretty awed at the thought of his husband using something like that. Anything like that could absolutely wreck a person. And it was being offered to him. A chance to try it. Especially when they both knew he eyeballed it once or twice when opening the drawer, but it would be made better because Hizashi was watching him this time.
His eyes would be on him as he pushed each inch into himself, would be on him as he went absolutely wild and fu- "Are you sure? I-It's yours, Zashi, not mine! And even then, I don't even know if I can take it."
"I'm one thousand percent sure, baby! It's going to be cleaned anyways and besides, we're married! My sex toys are your sex toys! They're ours! So, I don't have a single worry about it!" Hizashi chirped at him as he held the dildo out to Shouta, his eyes sparkling with encouragement that had him squirming in place when the blonde reached out with his free hand placing it on his foot then sliding upwards to his knee.
His skin positively hummed underneath that soft touch. It should be criminal how good a single touch felt to him. He groaned softly at the thought as he squirmed again when that hand slid back down his shin. Knowing exactly what he was doing with such a simple touch. "Y-You really think I can take something that big?"
"Well, if you want to try, we'll try it! If it doesn't work and you can't take it, then we'll know! But anything is possible, baby, and I have high confidence that you'll be able to take this just fine. Do you want to?"
He swallowed staring down at the absolute monster of a dildo sitting in his husband's hand like it was a pill he was offering to cure a headache or a hangover; it rolled lightly in his palm back and forth with the movement of his hand, seeming harmless yet intimidating somehow. He moved his hand pulling the current toy in him out with a disgustingly lewd suction sound from the slickness that had a wave of heat hitting his face at the obscene sound that had Hizashi's eyes flying down at the last second.
He then held it tightly in his hand, slick and threatening to fly out of his grasp when he looked around even if he knew there was nowhere for him to put it on the bed without hair covering it and then looked to Hizashi when the blonde reached out taking the slick thing out of his hand then handing him the dry toy as he sat up. God, it just felt thick in his hand, and he could very easily imagine what this type of damage this could impact on a person.
He'd have to hope, to pray, that he was stretched enough from the previous toy. Pray hard. He shifted slightly in order to snag the lube that he used to squeeze a generous amount into his palm before repeating the same motions he had with the other dildo that sat in Hizashi's hand with a tight grip like it would slip out of his hand at a moment's notice. Like it was a fish or something. He looked away from it to focus on spreading the lube over the toy, twisting and curving his hand to make sure it got absolutely everywhere.
Cringed when the lube dripped off the end from how much he used but it was necessary. Better to have this thing dripping in lube than not having enough. His hands were shaking as he reached his hand down, wiggling it forward until the tip pressed against him and his eyes flicked up to Hizashi who was staring down before looking up. He nodded. Shouta, in return, hesitantly nodded back.
And he began pushing. Pushing, pressing until finally he felt himself give away allowing the tip to slide forward and he kept pushing. And pushing. And pushing. It felt like it took forever, stopping then starting just to get the thing inside of him but once he did, he felt like it had pushed out every tiny wisp of air, every little word he could have ever said in his life, right out of him. He made tiny wheezing, squeaking noises when he got to the base with that final push inwards and he jolted with another wheezing squeak flying out of him as he held still.
He was shaking. Shaking, shaking, shaking. He had no hopes of controlling that as he sat there, his knees threatening to come together to press his legs together, but he fought the urge to do so knowing it wouldn't help anything. He felt like everything was throbbing; the rim of his entrance, the muscles inside, his very lower half seemed to be throbbing in time with his heart as that absolute monster sat inside of him.
His hand was shaking so hard he nearly lost his hold on it, and he hissed out a wheezing curse as he dug his nails into the silicone material of it holding on for dear life as he struggled to even out the breathes that hitched, cracked and flew down in jagged bursts that dare call themselves gasps. His legs were trembling, threatening to give out on him any moment, as his chest heaved, and he lifted his gaze to Hizashi who damn near looked ready to come any second as his mouth dropped open.
His brows had flow together, his eyes wide with fast blinks, and his beaths wheezed in just as unevenly, just as jaggedly as his own, and the dildo he'd been using dropped from the blonde's hands as it went slack. It hit the carpet with a muted thud that had the blonde twitching as he seemed to come back to himself reaching down with a hissed expletive of his own to find the toy that was no doubt covered in God knows what from the carpet.
When he groaned, he had assumed it would be a quiet little sound, had no reason to expect the explosive sound that came out of him that had Hizashi jerking back up in his chair. He jumped to his feet to do- what? What was he going to do? Shouta wheezed lightly with each breath as he stared up at the blonde who was reaching his hands out as if to help him somehow. "Shouta, are you okay? Does it hurt? If it hurts you can take it out, baby, it's okay! I'll go wash off the toy and we can-"
"Shut up!" He got out breathlessly, nearly inaudible as he stared up at his husband who was still hovering at the end of the bed, swaying from side to side as if he wanted to launch forward and rip the thing out of him himself but Shouta really did just need him to be quiet.
For two minutes he needed him to be quiet. He swallowed hard, the action making his throat ache, as he tried to take deep breaths to soothe the ragged breathing and he closed his eyes for a moment as he focused on taking the breaths that still managed to shake on their way out just a bit. It ached. It fucking ached and he still felt the throbs in time with his very heartbeat, but it wasn't pain. Not really. It just ached. And he could deal with that.
All that mattered was how it felt when he moved it and if there was pain when he did that then he'd take it out. He'd take it out and he'd go back to the other and fuck himself on it while Hizashi watched but he had to admit that the blonde's eyes on him as he pushed every bit of those nine inches into himself had made it worth it. He opened his eyes with another swallow, staring up at Hizashi again when he nodded at the chair.
"Sit down."
"Shouta-!"
"Sit. Down."
He put as much force in those two growled words as he could prompting Hizashi to drop down in the chair like he was a puppet and every string had just gotten cut; his legs were sprawled in front of him as his eyes, wider than anything, flickered over him relentlessly from what he could see. And from what he could see was his husband was still hard. Still very, very hard. And that meant the game, the scenario, was still going.
He let out a breath as he leaned back on his arm, stretching out backwards and he found it made it bearable; not perfect, not gone, but bearable. As if the stretched-out position helped make space for it to settle in and he breathed out slowly when he then gave a cautious pull and thrust only to feel a wave of heat rush up his spine. Not discomfort, not pain, but there was a wave of pleasure that came when the toy rubbed against his prostate dragging a gasp from him when he looked down.
He knew it should be impossible, he knew he shouldn't see anything, but he swore that just faintly- "Jesus Christ! Zashi, do you see th-!"
The blonde leaned forward then, his limbs moving sporadically until he was leaning forward with his hands on the bed looking down at stomach and even if Shouta didn't touch the skin the blonde's eyes already wide eyes gawked down at the very faint but somewhat easy to identify bulge. How? How was that even possible? "Holy fucking shit!"
"Sh-Shit!"
His voice was an echoing wheeze of his own husband's voice coming out as a choked croaking that sent shivers down his spine when those eyes stared down in such rapturous awe that he whined drawing his attention. "Are you okay though? It can't be comf-"
"I-I'll be okay! It's- Mmmm! Rubbing up ag-against it and it feel- Ah!"
He hadn't meant to move his hand back so far, yet he had caused the toy to push in deeply again making his arm give out. There wasn't a chance, a prayer, that it would support him anymore and he felt the bed bounce as his back hit it and it made reaching down a bit awkward, but he didn't mind it as he stared up at the ceiling. He began moving his hand creating cautious, shallow thrusts that rubbed against his prostate making sparks fly up his spine.
His back arched upwards, pulling a cry from his lips as he fought the urge to move his hips. Not yet. Absolutely not yet. He then lifted his head enough to stare between his legs at Hizashi who was staring down at his stomach again making him whimper. "Zashi!" Eyes lifted again to his. "Wa-Watch me? Watch me, please? Do-Don't look away, okay? I- Mmm! Mmmnn, don't look away! I need yo-you to watch me!"
"I won't! I won't look away, baby, I promise! I don't think I could anyways, not when you're so-"
His words were cut off once again by the pure pleasure filled cry that flew out of Shouta as his hips jumped up instinctively making a shot of pressure run through him that bordered on discomfort though not enough to make him pull it out. He moved in those shallow thrusts that had his toes curling, his teeth grinding together when his jaw snapped shut and a snapping moan ripped out of his throat as he pushed deeply and he heard the delight, the near excitement in Hizashi's moan from his place at the end of the bed.
"Shouta, the fact you think I could ever look away from you, especially watching you take a fucking nine inch dildo is fucking nuts! Fuck, baby, even I haven't taken it that good! I couldn't look away before and you bet your fucking ass I won't now!"
"Good! Y-You keep your eyes on me! Or I'll-I'll-!"
He couldn't finish the sentence as he gasped in between pulling the toy back a decent bit, he couldn't name off the top of his head how many inches, but it made him feel as if he was shifting inside with the movement before thrusting forward drawing a shout from himself at the careful movement. He could still feel those throbs though they were lost to the heat flaming up his spine, sizzling into his veins and moving like lava beneath his skin alone his bones until he was writhing on the sheets.
He still felt his body begging for a chance, one more chance, to grow accustomed to the toy inside of him but his hand refused to listen to his head as it moved instinctively to pull back that same length then thrusting it forward making him jerk with a cry. It was strange; he had always thought that he felt full with Hizashi in him and while that was a comfortable fullness, a natural one, this was something else altogether.
It was stuffed to the brim, talking up every little bit of space inside of him, and it pushed at his inner walls demanding that space was to be made for it. The fact that Hizashi used this once in a blue moon really was awe-inspiring now. "Ho-How do you do this? How do you u-use this, Zashi? It's f-fucking hhh-huge!"
"Practice, baby, lots of practice!"
He moaned the words with that familiar sound of his hand no doubt rubbing at himself again making Shouta moan at the image flickering through his head, the tone, and the mere idea that it had taken multiple times just for Hizashi to take something like this even one time let alone countless. He almost laughed when that conversation came to him, the one they'd had when watching the porn together in what felt like years ago.
When Hizashi pointed out the length of the porn actors dick, claiming it was huge, and only now did it come to him making him want to scoff. Making him want to shout, 'of course you would know!' yet his lips wouldn't cooperate to move let those words out though he knew he'd have time for that once they were done. Once he reached that orgasm that felt very close to taking form already.
"Fuck, Sho, fuck! You should see yourself, baby! I wasn't fucking wrong in suggesting this! I was fucking right! Gr-Greedy hole of yours is spread so fucking wide around that thing! Taking it so much better than I-I ever did! And this is your first time! Fucking shit, Shouta, you really are good at taking cock no matter the size, aren't you? I bet you'd be so fucking loose I'd be slipping out of you, wouldn't I?"
He was growing confident and perhaps, just maybe, that was his downfall. He began pulling back longer giving longer thrusts that had his body jerking at the near painful pleasure it sent exploding under his skin and he was surprised at the low snarl that broke out of him, a sound that sent chills down his own spine when he heard Hizashi groan in response. He didn't think he'd be so confident as to yank and push like with the other toy but this was just as good.
No matter how shallow and no matter how long his thrusts were with that toy it still rubbed against his prostate sending sparks through him, still had him clenching down around the toy tightly in response the best he could. Like he needed to cling to it internally to make it bearable despite the throbs that ripped through him each time he clenched around the thing, he didn't mind it one bit. A dildo like this was designed to fill someone up, to remove any chance of a gap and to stretch, to absolutely obliterate a person.
Or, in Hizashi's very common words when talking about larger sizes with Nemuri, it was designed to rearrange someone's fucking guts. And he swore he felt his own very much being rearranged by this monster of a dildo. He could only imagine what a real dick of this size would do to a person. It dragged another snapping, snarling moan out from between his clenched teeth as he then sucked in a breath as he pulled in those long, decent sized pushes that still didn't feel like he was close to dragging the tip close to his entrance.
It still felt like he was going deeper with every inward thrust. He hated it. He fucking loved it. Maybe he was a bit of a size queen himself when it came to this thing? He didn't know but his moans were guttural for once rather than high, his groans rumbling in his throat until he swore he sounded like some kind of animal rutting desperately into the air with each forward motion of the dildo.
He struggled to keep his eyes open even if he was staring at their bland ceiling. He could feel those eyes watching him, knew they were taking in every movement of his hand, and were no doubt enjoying the hell out of the sight. He knew if he saw Hizashi taking something like this he'd be enjoying every goddamn minute of it. His feet squirmed before pushing down to raise his hips upwards in a jerking thrust, the pre-come smearing against his skin was making itself known.
He whimpered when he looked down at his twitching erection that looked damn near painful with how it appeared simply engorged. Ready to blow any moment and he knew he was in for that type of orgasm he had the night of their 'threesome' with the duplicate. It was going to be good. He wasn't completely past that throbbing, the stretch that still ate up every little focus point if he thought too long but the thrusting was doing more than enough to steal his attention away from it as he gasped for his breaths when he heard the chair creaking lightly.
Blinking, he turned his head when the bed dipped next to him where Hizashi was leaning across it. His arms were tucked close to his chest as his eyes lifted to his face, burning into Shouta's, and he whimpered squirming against the sheets as he looked back at the blonde, his face burning hotly, his heart hammering in beats that still had him feeling strangely sick. It was a strange reaction to see the blonde so close to him, his face closer to his than it had been since the living room, and he squirmed again with another whimper flying out of him.
"You're so pretty, Sho. Such a pretty red blush, even your eyes all are fogged up, and the way you're moving is fucking good. Hell, even the sounds you're making are amazing! Such a pretty boy!"
He whimpered at the cooed words as Hizashi reached a handout stroking his cheek, his fingers feeling chilled compared to the heat there, and yet he leaned into the soft brushing touch that trailed down to his parted lips. He wanted Hizashi closer. He wanted him to watch. He wanted his lips on his own in the fervent, sizzling kiss he knew was waiting. He arched his chest up with an eager little sound leaving him, his hand moving quicker between his legs.
Those waves of heat kept sizzling up his spine and fanning out to every possible point of his body making him writhe and squirm against the sheets with a moan. "I could watch you all night long, baby, all fucking night! If I could I'd be taking pictures, videos, anything to remind myself that you're laying here looking so heartbreakingly beautiful as you fuck yourself on such a huge fucking dildo! You should see yourself, see how you look, and I'll bet my whole fucking bank account you're seconds away from losing your fucking mind!"
"Zashi! Za-Zashi, it- Mmmnn! I can't- Watch me! Watch me cum, please! I want you too! I'll pl-play with myself all night! Just keep looking at me!" He gasped squirming as his toes curled tightly, his right hand finally moving down to grip his erection, flying up and down quickly as he whimpered struggling to keep his eyes from rolling back at the pleasure that burst through him at such a simple gesture.
Hizashi's own lashes were fluttering lower giving him that sleepy, bedroom look that he loved to see and being this close he could see those freckles blending in with the fierce red of his blush and he could hear those fast pants of his. Could feel the bed moving just a bit from his hips grinding down no doubt and he shuddered whining loudly as finally, finally he felt that orgasm building. It was almost painful how it crested steadily but slowly, his legs shaking as his stomach flexed and tightened eagerly with the oncoming crash.
A crash that he was eager to dive headfirst into as he gasped with soft cries mingling with each huff of air that left his lips. "Nnnnggh, gonna cum, Zashi! It's- Ahhh! Ah, Zashi! Fuck me tonight, all night! I just need- Mmmmn! Yes! Yes, yes! Ah, I wanted this so bad, Zashi!"
"Oh yeah? You've wanted this bad, baby?" Hizashi's breathless voice was so close, so very close as a quiet grunt left the blonde as he no doubt ground himself against the bed, his fingers softly stroking his hot cheek idly like he was in need of some comfort in prelude of his orgasm.
As if he could tell he would need that comfort. It was strange how frantic the energy felt, how absolutely thick it felt going down into his lungs, and he watched those green eyes flick down to his erection with a groan sliding out of the blonde as the bed bounced with a few harsh thrusts his hips gave against it, and he whimpered softly. "You're so pretty, baby, but you look like a goddamn slut fucking yourself so fast on that thing! You're going to be fucking gaping all night long with how fucking stretched you'll be afterwards! Does that excite you? That I'm watching you rearrange your own damn guts with that thing? That you're fucking yourself so shamelessly on it in front of your husband?"
"Yes! Yes, it does! It's- Ahhhn! Ahh, haah, it's the best!" His voice was a shout that had his throat straining lightly, his voice coming back to his own ears far too loudly, yet the occasional squelching and the strangely slick sound of his hand slamming the dildos into himself shamelessly now, hard as he could manage without hurting himself.
This alone was making him twist and squirm frantically with moans flying out of him. His panting felt too loud, the music far too quiet, but he didn't mind it whatsoever as he then felt Hizashi pushing up from the bed making his eyes which had been slipping shut fly open with a strange burst of panic. Where was he going? What was he doing? The blonde was walking back around the bed, his head lifting to watch the blonde's path and he blinked when the blonde sat right back into that chair after having shifted his position once. Why didn't he stay? Why was he sitting back in the chair again?
"What are y-you doin-"
"You wanted me to watch you cum, right? I could watch it from that angle, but I'd be missing all the best parts and this angle is much better because I get to sit here, watching you pound yourself silly with that thing to my heart's content. I mean, look at you! Slamming that fucking thing like you have not a thought in your head other than getting off in front of me!"
He then smirked making Shouta whine as the blonde sat back reaching down to palm himself before settling into that rubbing rhythm that had him shivering as his pleasure crested upwards making that tightening coil in his groin, in his lower stomach, twist tightly. Close, close, close. He was so close that it was almost unbearable knowing how painfully intense it would wash over him.
He twisted, making aborted little movements that he couldn't tell were to chase away from his own hand slamming the dildo into himself or to jerk his hips in time with his frantic hand movement. All he knew was he made those tiny movements, his wrist was cramping, and he wasn't sure how much longer he could keep it up.
"Come on, baby, you can do it! Let me see you cum, won't you? I'm sure you'll cum so hard it'll get on your chest from the force of it and I'll see every little bit of it! How your cock will twitch like it does, how your thighs will twitch and shake from how tense they get, watching that cum land on your pretty white skin! I'll get to see how your hole will twitch and clench around that thing like you're trying to mil-"
He wailed out bucking his hips up as he squeezed his erection tightly, stroking viciously, gasping as he moved his left hand to slam the toy into himself in long, hard thrusts that he knew would come back to bite him later, but it didn't matter one little bit to his frazzled mind. His orgasm snapped, breaking so violently throughout him that his wail very quickly became a scream as he threw his head backwards to press to the mattress.
He could feel it as his body squirmed, bucking upwards desperately as his erection twitched in his hand yet he could hardly feel the spurts landing on his skin. He could barely hear himself as he gasped, the heaving breaths wheezing down his throat, his muscles clenching tightly as he twitched and stiffened through the blindingly, amazingly painful orgasm that ripped him away from every little sense his body possessed.
It was a total white out; there was nothing outside of that burning, scalding orgasm that had him screaming no doubt as he writhed against the sheets. There was nothing other than his body twisting, jerking through the waves as his feet scrambled for purchase on the bed as they slid against the sheets, and then it was ebbing out, ending just as suddenly as it crashed over him. Every muscle felt tightly wound, so tight he trembled under that stiff posture until he was flopping onto the bed.
Much like how Hizashi had fallen into the chair earlier; like a puppet having its strings cut. His hands remained in their places as he slowly, very slowly came back to himself through that white pleasure that throbbed through him even as the trembling effects of the orgasm ebbed out of him. He grunted when he felt the toy being slid out, his hand brushed away to do so, and he opened his eyes with what felt like a tremendous effort as he twitched with those residual reactions.
He looked up when Hizashi leaned above him, sweat shining in a sheen over his forehead as those eyes flicked over his face and a hand reached up touching his cheek, a touch he tilted his head slowly into with a slumping movement as he struggled to open his eyes after a blink. He heard that lewd, squelching sound as the toy finally slid out and the relief he felt was almost stunning; he hadn't really realized just how much pressure was inside of him, not even when he initially slid it in, but now that it was out he was sighing heavily as he forced his eyes to focus on Hizashi's face. He needed- He wanted to ask-
"Di-Did you s-sssee? You wat' me?"
"I saw, baby, I saw."
The hand moved from his cheek up to his forehead soothing the hair away from the sweaty skin, a happy little hum leaving his throat at the touch when he looked down at himself; Hizashi was right, he'd managed to get a single spurt of come onto his chest somehow, just below actually but it was still in that chest area. Nice. His thoughts must have shown on his face because Hizashi sighed out kissing his wet forehead, that hand stroking his hair line softly when the blonde kissed the arch of his eyebrow, down to the scar beneath his eye, then down to his hot cheek.
"You did good, baby, so good! You just relax, okay? We don't need to do anything more right now because you're going to be fucking sore the next day or so. You not only took nine inches, but you fucking pounded out an orgasm with those nine-inches, something you've never done before so trust me when I say you're gonna be pretty damn sore."
"Mmmm, don't care. Felt goo'." He sighed out when the blonde rolled his eyes, the last thing he really saw before his lashes fluttered and his own eyes closed as the blonde shifted closer to him with those lips pressing against his jaw when he felt it against his hip. He frowned, his lashes fluttering on his cheeks, but he couldn't for the life of him get his eyes to open again. "You didn't cum. Zashi, why didn't you cum? Did you not like it? Is that why you're still hard? I can help with it if you want me too, just give me a few minutes."
"Oh, trust me, I wanted to, baby! It's just hard to focus on yourself when your husband orgasms that goddamn hard! Honestly, it's pretty distracting."
A huff of a laugh against his lips before a soft, sweet sort of kiss was pressed against him and he sighed through his nose as he reached up to wrap his arms around Hizashi, clinging to his shirt as he happily, lazily kissed the blonde back. It was an easy, slow kiss that had his pounding heart stuttering over its beats as he clung onto the blonde who pulled away after what felt like too short of a moment.
"And no, you don't have to do anything, Sho. I think I'll get off just fine with everything that just happened really fresh in my mind! You just relax and I'll get you all cleaned up, baby. You definitely deserve to nap for a bit, okay?"
"Mmmkay. Love you, Zashi."
"I love you too, you crazy, kinky bastard."