"You know this is stupid," Michonne said to him as they sat on the soft dark carpet, "I literally have to be out of here in thirty minutes."
"Nobody is stopping you." He said as he rested his hands on his knees.
She snorted, "You make no sense."
"Neither do you." He turned to look at her.
She didn't know what do or say to him. There wasn't any logic in this. She was good with things being black and white, but with him everything was muddled.
"You know you are big part of the problem," Michonne spoke every syllable with reason, "You pushed your wife too far. You took her for granted."
Rick scoffed at the thought, "I never took her for granted."
"Then why are you here?" She was done with the sugarcoating, "You just told your wife that you kissed someone else. You are supposed to be there fighting for her. Instead you come here and expect me to make it better."
"No," He shook his head, "I did what she wanted. She needs space."
"No she doesn't," Michonne paused, "She needs her husband to show her that he still loves her. You do love her, don't you?"
"What kind of question is that?" He was defensive.
"It's a good question considering how your actions tell a different story."
"Of course I love her."
"Then why are you here?" She repeated.
He looked at her, "Because it's different with you."
"Of course it is, we haven't been married for eighteen years." Michonne was finding it hard to tolerate his dodging, "I'm exciting, I'm new, I never kissed your best friend. You need to understand that this is not about me. I could be anybody and you would feel like this."
Rick tilted his head and narrowed his eyes at her, "You really have a hard time accepting that I like you for you."
She shook her head in frustration, "Don't make this about me when it's your midlife crisis, not mine."
"Why does everybody think I'm having a mid life crisis? I'm not even fifty for fucks sake."
Michonne laughed and teased, "What are you then? forty nine?"
"Excuse me," He pretended to be hurt and laughed with her, "I'm like thirty."
"No you are not." She snorted and laughed harder, "If you're thirty, I'm like ten."
"Ouch, you think I look that much older than you? " He kept on with the joke, "Fine add ten years and then you got it."
Michonne nodded, "That sounds more fitting."
He kept glaring at her questioningly, "So?"
"Are you seriously asking how old am I?" She crossed her arms, "You know that's considered rude."
"Oh come on," He smirked back, "humour me."
She rolled her eyes, "I turned thirty four last month."
"Good, for a second there I was worried I kissed a twenty year old." He said casually.
"Now that's just slick." She laughed infectiously, causing him to grin.
Her laughter turned slowly into silence. She couldn't look at him because she could feel his gaze glued on her.
"What do you think I should do?" Rick asked, the conversation taking a more serious turn, "Honestly. No bullshit. If you were in my shoes."
Michonne drew circles on the smooth hotel room carpet with her finger, trying to figure out what she wanted to say.
"I feel like I can't go home like this." He confessed.
"You need to forget," She finally said, "like I said earlier. This, isn't happening in this lifetime. So you focus on your babies and wife."
He gulped nervously, "You mean you want nothing to do with me?"
"I mean," She gracefully got up, "We can be friends, sure, but nothing else."
"How are we supposed to be friends after-"
"Easy," She interrupted him and extended her hand, "Hi my name is Michonne. Nice to meet you."
He took her hand as he stood up himself, "Just like that huh?"
"I don't know what you're talking about," She smiled softly, "From this moment forward we are just Rick and Michonne. Friends."
"Friends." He said with a nod as he still held her hand. It was a tough pill to swallow.
She felt uneasy, she pulled her hand from his grasp, "I really need to get going. We have a tight schedule."
"Sure, sorry," He buried his hands in his pockets awkwardly, "Why didn't you just take a flight like normal people do?"
Michonne chuckled, "Sasha had the same exact thought and I told her I love my car. I also like driving."
"Sasha," He said with a bit of an attitude, "You told her, didn't you?"
"Rick," She groaned, irritated as she checked that all of her luggage was in place, "You're ruining it. Remember, friends, we don't need to talk about it anymore. Let's just pretend nothing ever happened between us."
He didn't like this game, but decided to play along for her sake of mind, "Sure, definately no kissing on the roof, got it."
Michonne turned around to look at him, "Are you mocking me?"
"Nope," He simply replied and changed the topic of conversation before she got mad at him, "What do you think about our newlyweds?"
She exhaled in relief, this way their communication could work, "I know Connie is more into him than anybody I've ever seen her with. She lights up like a Christmas tree around him. It's cute."
"Daryl is crazy about her," Rick smiled, "I know because she already got to meet Dog through facetime."
"Why the hell is his dog named Dog?"
He chuckled at her question, "I asked him once. He just told me he looked like a Dog."
She laughed, "Of course he did."
There was a silent pause as she finished packing her purse.
"You excited to get back to work?" He asked, trying to keep the conversation flowing and he was genuinely curious.
"Yep. I'm ready to make those rich baby daddies poor again." She joked as she tossed her last pair of heels in her purse because they didn't fit in the luggage. She changed into her black Vans sneakers.
"My son has those," He pointed at her shoes, "I didn't know adults wear them."
She tossed the other shoe at him, "Seriously, not that type of friends."
He laughed loudly as she rolled her eyes.
Rick tossed the other shoe back carefully, "I'm just kidding. I like you better like this."
"Like what? A teenager?" She scoffed.
"No," He stared at her as she tied her shoelaces, "Y'know sneakers and a t-shirt. I'm not saying the dresses and heels are bad, of course you look nice with those. I mean you always look nice. Nicer than most people."
She listened to his awkward and uncomfortable endless rambling about her looks, "I don't think I've ever been called nice that many times."
Rick felt embarrassed, "I'm just saying you look... nice."
She shook her head at him, he was kind of cute when he got flustered, "I appreciate the opinion Rick Grimes, but I prefer my dresses and heels that cost probably more than your mortgage."
He pointed his finger at her suddenly, "See you're the one who starts the fights and makes it personal, then it escalates into things that we do not do as friends."
Michonne laughed loudly, disbelieving, "Oh and you're completely innocent in all of it."
"You get all snappy at me, then I snap back and we are making out again." He joked innocently.
"Friends!" She reminded him with a little attitude.
"Fine!" He answered back as dramatically, "Friends!"
"You're an idiot," She laughed at him as she got ready to exit the hotel room, "You should probably come with me. They are coming here to collect my things and I don't think they would approve of you sitting around in a room you haven't paid for."
He sighed as he followed her out. It felt like they ran out of time. Soon as they got out of her room, another door opened in the hallway.
Sasha looked at the pair with a confused look on her face.
"Grimes." She greeted him with a serious voice as he walked past her.
"Sasha." He said back and walked ahead.
"What the hell?" Sasha mouthed to Michonne as they walked behind Rick.
He didn't think about the consequences or really care about them. He ended up making the decision to walk the two women outside.
Sasha slammed the trunk in the excruciating heat with an annoyed huff, she didn't like seeing him around and he quickly picked up on it.
"That's it. Let's go." She said firmly, walking to the passenger side of Michonnes car. She got inside and stared at them from the rearview mirror.
Michonne felt anxious because it was time to actually say goodbye, "I hope it all works out for you."
Part of her was very upset about this ending. Whatever it was that formed between them, it felt so natural.
Rick nodded, he felt overwhelmed, "I hope that for you too."
"Just don't bury yourself in work, okay?" She looked him straight in the eyes, "Spend time with your kids and the wifey. They deserve it."
He just nodded again. It hurt like hell to finally understand that no matter how deep their connection was, this amazing woman in front of him would never be in his life like this again. Soon she would only be a memory. It was hard to accept that.
"I'll try my best, I promise." he managed to say as he stared back at her.
Beep!
They both jumped at the car horn being honked. Sasha was signaling for Michonne to hurry up from inside the car.
"She hates me doesn't she?" He asked her, kind of happy that Sashas honking stopped the melancholic goodbyes.
"Yep. I think she does." She laughed as she moved past him to the driver side of the car.
Rick watched her open the car door, and all he wanted to do was slam it shut and ask her to stay. Of course that was madness and far from the reality he lived in.
Michonne turned towards him once more, "It was nice to meet you Rick."
It was all she manged to come up with without making this more difficult.
"You too, Michonne." His heavy accent sounded raspier than before. He was more emotional than she expected him to be.
She wanted him to have a nice memory of her so she waved at him with her brilliant smile and hopped inside her big car.
He watched her disappear into the Las Vegas traffic. He had never felt so lonely in his life.
He wondered around for hours and thought back to Michonnes last words to him. He couldn't see himself going home and forgetting about her. Rick knew she didn't have it any easier. She just told him to forget because it was the right thing to do. She kissed him this time around. There was reason for that.
Right now, he felt selfish. His own needs and wants affected his judgment. He hadn't seen his kids in almost a week and here he was whining after a woman who was certainly not their mother. He fiddled with his wedding ring that he had worn for almost two decades.
His wife was still probably crying her eyes out after he flat out told her he had bonded with someone else and they shared a intimate moment. It was a moment, that left him wondering what else there was to this life.
His friends had taken time out of their lives to support him. Negan had pulled a lot of strings to make this happen. The women had spent hundreds of dollars on new dresses and all that. They all expected to have a great time with him and his family.
And yet here he was. He could seem ungrateful, but at the same time he felt like his actions were justified. He never stopped and thought about what he wanted for himself. He was so used to serving for others and that was his downfall. This could be a turning point for him, but he knew it wasn't that simple.
He got up and walked almost thirty minutes back to the Hilton. Every step he took he felt more and more anxious. He swallowed nervously as he walked inside the door and greeted the workers at the main desk with a nod. It was really time to buckle up and deal with everything.
He was on autopilot as he went to the elevator and stepped out on his floor. His mind was still blank when he opened the door to their room.
Lori was fixing her hair when he walked inside. She stopped for a second to look at him before continuing, "Where were you?" She asked, very flat and irritated.
"I took a walk." He told her simply.
She mumbled something that he couldn't hear as he sat on their bed.
"The dinner reservation is in a couple of hours," Lori talked to him like any other day, "You should shower and trim that god awful beard."
Rick didn't want to waste their time being passive aggressive back and forth, "I never meant to hurt you Lori. I never meant to hurt our family. I didn't plan on coming here to destroy everything we fought for. You got to believe me."
"I do believe you," Lori sounded just as tired as he did, "because I know how it is."
He narrowed his eyes at her, getting angry at her choice of words, "You told me there was nothing between you two. So you can't know."
She wanted to laugh at his hypocrisy, but decided not to stoop so low, "Just hours ago you said this kiss just happened. Now it's something between you two. Who is she?"
"Nobody," Rick gulped, feeling guilty, "I didn't mean it like that. I was talking about you and him."
"Why are even talking about me and Shane? You can't even compare mine mistake with yours! " She raised her voice, "Rick, he was there for us for years. This woman, you've known her for five meaningless days!"
"And that's somehow better? You two wiped out years Lori, yeah! Years! I know. He was like my brother!" He practically screamed at her.
"I know!" She exploded, tossing her curling iron on the floor.
They stared at each other. The pain of it all was very overwhelming. Rick just wanted her to say the words. He wanted her to be the one who said it was over. He couldn't be the one when he wronged her so horribly.
"Rick," Her voice was a lot calmer, "I know what I did, believe me. I would take it back in heartbeat."
He could see that she was sincere. It surprised him. He nodded, "I know. I do."
Lori picked up her curling iron and placed it on the table. She took a moment before sitting down next to him on the bed. He knew she was nervous because she picked on her fingernails and one of them was already bleeding.
"I don't want to live with this anger anymore," She said quietly, "I married you because I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you."
It was the last thing he expected to hear from her.
"Is that what you still want?" Rick asked point blank.
She looked at him as tears welled in her eyes, "Yes."
Rick felt hopeless. He didn't know if she only wanted him to stay out of spite. It also felt wrong to throw everything away and take this family away from his children. Maybe, for now he had to accept the fact that his family was worth the sacrifice.
"Then we'll try."
It was a simple agreement.
"She is an unicorn." Carol leaned against the bar counter as they waited to be seated in their table.
"Huh?" Daryl grunted in confusion at her statement as his eyes stayed glued on his new wife and Judith.
"Absolutely gorgeous, smart, educated, but kind and down to earth," Carol explained, "An unicorn in this world."
He nodded proudly, "Yeah. I can't disagree with that."
"Women in Atlanta must drink different water than us," She continued, feeling a little curious, "too bad only one of you was single considering her friends."
He looked at her with raised brows, knowing very well what she was implying, "I ain't saying nothing."
"You don't need to," Carol said bluntly, joking with him, "Everybody with eyes and a functioning brain could see it. Rick was practically drooling."
"Nah," Daryl looked at her, , "You better stay away from your husbands novels, those books are turning you loopy."
She playfully ruffled his head before walking up to Connie and Judith, leaving the conversation up in the air. There was apparently nothing she wouldn't notice.
Rest of the group finally arrived. Lori and Rick walked in last. Negan looked at Carl. He had promised him that he would figure out if his mom told his dad about the elephant in the room. Small chatter started as they were guided to their table. Negan was quick to pull Lori aside, "Hey I need a moment."
She was surprised, but a got a feeling she knew exactly what his issue was, "Sure."
Rick noticed the odd exchange and looked back at them and then at Lucille, "Is everything alright?"
"Yes it's fine." Lori tried her best to sound cheery in her answer.
He nodded and looked at his friend, wondering what was so urgent that he had to pull Lori away, but right now he actually didn't care enough to ask further. The conversation with Lori had made him numb.
Rest of them took their seats while Lori and Negan stayed back at the bar.
"You didn't tell him did you?" Straight away he practically backed her in a corner, "I need answers. Right now."
Lori narrowed her eyes at him and shook her head, "I don't know what you think you know-"
"Shane. I know, Carl told me in the lobby ," He didn't hesitate to strike back strongly, "You know how I feel about those kids. I'm not about to watch by while one of them is in the middle of this mess because you can't control your texting habits."
"Oh that's rich," She kept shaking her head with a bitter laugh, "So does this loyalty to our children go both ways? would you have told me about his little tryst in Las Vegas?"
Negan was confused, "What are you talking about?"
"I'm talking about her," She clarified, "You must know about her. Rick told me."
He didn't want to give away anything that could harm his friend, "I didn't know there was anything physical."
"He kissed her," her information floored him, "he told me. And I told him about Shane. So I agreed to forgive him if he forgave me."
Negan stared at her, wondering if she was bluffing, "He knows?"
She kept her voice down as she lied smoothly, "Of course I told him. He doesn't know that you and Carl know, and I think we should keep it that way."
"Well that's healthy." He rolled his eyes, "You two are just gonna pretend nothing happened?"
"We are not pretending. We want to make this work. He doesn't need to know that his son is in the middle of it. He would feel embarrassed and I don't want that because it was my mistake. It's over between me and Shane."
"I am not a good friend if I don't offer him support when I can do that," Negan looked directly at her, "I swear, I didn't know about any funny business. I would have done something if I knew they were even close to that point."
"Who is she?" Lori demanded to know.
"We met her at the strip club," He told her, it was the truth after all, "Nobody you know."
She laughed bitterly, "Of course, a stripper."
"No, she wasn't...eh, she worked at the bar... clothes and all." He came up quickly.
She studied his face, but seemed to buy it, "This needs to stay between us."
"I don't get the harm in it if he knows that I know. I won't mention Carl."
"You remember how he shut everyone out after what happened the first time?" She reminded him, "He pushed everyone away. If he knew that you know about his mistake it would be mortifying to him. You know how Rick gets."
Negan knew what she meant. Last time he blocked everyone out for months because he felt ashamed of the situation even when he wasn't the one who caused it. Now it wasn't just Loris betrayal. He, himself had an emotional affair with a another woman, and he even denied it earlier. So yeah, he probably didn't want his friends to know.
"Fine, " He agreed, "I won't say a word about any of it, but you two need to get it together."
Lori exhaled in relief, "Thank you."
Negan didn't want her to think things like this could be swept under the carpet without consequences, "I'll talk to Carl. Maybe he has an ounce of respect left for you and will drop this, but I wouldn't count on it."
Her relief turned into hurt as he walked away.
The dinner table was mostly filled with joy.
Rick stared at his glass of wine and tried his best to focus on the moment. He simply couldn't. Negan and Lucille were opposite of him and Lori. He could sense there was something bugging him. Then again, Negan was the type who always had something bugging him. Lucille and Negan would bicker and fight so often that it seemed normal to everyone at this point. So he didn't want to even ask what was with the tension.
Rick was more focused on his own mind which wouldn't stop screaming her name.
He tried his best to gather his thoughts, but all he could think about was Michonne. He was frustrated with himself that he couldn't just move on like she did. She hopped on that car and never looked back.
He glanced at Lori who was talking to Maggie like any other day. He really didn't understand how she could sit next to him after what he told her. Literally, he had told her about kissing another woman and she was sitting next to him on the dinner table like nothing ever happened.
"I'm gonna go to the bathroom." He murmured to Lori. He felt claustrophobic all of a sudden as cold sweat took over his body.
"I'll order for you." She smiled at him, but was suspicious as to what came over him.
Rick just nodded quickly before walking off. He really needed to get away for a second. He found the bathroom and locked the door.
"Jesus Christ." Rick muttered to himself as he leaned over the sink, maybe it was the hangover from last night, but he felt physically sick.
His daze was broken when he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. He took his phone out and stared at it in shock. He felt the familiar rush of excitement and anticipation go through him when he read the short message.
"Hey friend."
Thank you for the words of kindness and love. I try my best to write whenever I have the time. And there is bunch of new plots coming. Exciting! Stay tuned!