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Chapter 175


Leah


Jake's closeness did me good. It didn't matter how my life would look, or his. Or Mom and Dads. Or our friends. Jake would always be with me. That was a very comforting thought.

School was hard. It was to be expected. But it was easier than when I was with Ben. After all, Marcus wasn't constantly running into me here.

"Are you sure you don't want me to come with you?" asked Jake cautiously as he picked me up after practice.

We were standing at the edge of the woods, just outside Becky's house.

I smiled slightly and shook my head in disapproval.

He didn't want to leave me alone in my currant mood.

"I'll run over, eat, and run back home," I stated.

Jake didn't look convinced.

"I won't do anything stupid," I promised. I really didn't intend to. Everything hurt and I felt like crying, but I would be able to cope with it. What else was left to me.

Jake and Becky collectively took me in their arms before I walked into the snow-powdered forest.

It was only a little after five o'clock and the meal would be at six o'clock, whereby I would need at most a quarter of an hour for the way. In that respect, I had time. Alas. I would prefer anything to time. My thoughts, actually as expected, took on a life of their own.

Marcus' school had been out since four o'clock. They didn't have practice after school, but sports were integrated with them into the normal schedule. Only before games additional training sessions took place the days before. Therefore, Marcus would certainly be in my room right now packing up his clothes. I still couldn't believe that he wouldn't be there anymore.

I was crying again by the time I got deep enough in the woods, undressed, and phased.

With my school bag in my muzzle, I leisurely walked off.

Not far behind Nanuk's family's property ran the Saco River. On its bank I dressed again and washed my face with the clear ice-cold water from the river. And took an examining look into a little pocket mirror.

That looked pretty bleak.

I tried a cheerful smile.

Well, I probably wouldn't be able to fool Jake with that, but maybe those Native Americans who didn't know me nearly as well.

I tried to keep this face and made my way through the forest, which was quite unfamiliar to me.

I actually had to smirk when I reach the road.

'Saco Woods Drive'. What a coincidence. The man who imprinted on a girl from Saco lived on a street who was named so.

I had to walk down the street a bit more until I arrived in front of the right house.

Wow... That was ... spacious. It couldn't compete with Carlisle's palace, but it could easily compete with David's big house.

I had not noticed at all last Monday. That explained that several generations lived together here without getting on each other's nerves. The driveway was already bigger than ours. No chaos due to the large number of cars. There were six cars here, which would have completely filled our driveway. But there was actually still a little room here. Behind Nanuk's Volvo was a little Honda Civic. There was also a new Chevrolet pickup, an elegant BMW sedan, a VW T-Roc and a chic coupé from Toyota. All not such expensive luxury cars as in Rosie's garage, but not exactly the cheapest cars you could drive either.

I rang the doorbell.

"My salvation!", Akai theatrically fell around my neck as he opened the door for me and hastily pushed me right in after pulling the bag off my shoulder and setting it aside rather clumsily.

Taken completely by surprise by this greeting, I laughed.

Like him.

The destination was a room on the first floor and then apparently a desk where some school documents were spread out. He pushed me onto the chair in front of it.

"Explain this to me!" he demanded immediately.

I looked at the many pieces of paper in front of me.

Biology. Genetics. Structure of DNA.

"Leah is not here to do your homework! Besides, dinner's almost ready!" Susan, who had just entered the room, reprimanded her son sternly. "Hello, Leah. I'm glad you're here. I hope you brought an appetite," she greeted me belatedly, putting a hand on my shoulder with a friendly smile.

"Yes, I did. Thank you for the invitation," I replied.

"I don't want her to do it for me, I want her to explain it!" defended Akai with a mischievous grin.

Rolling her eyes, Susan left again, but as soon as she disappeared from the doorway, Nanuk appeared there.

Immediately I stood up, walked towards him and he hurriedly came towards me.

His arms were tight around me, and it felt so good. It was like a little redemption after those pretty crappy past twenty-four hours. I would have started crying again immediately if the next person hadn't shown up right away.

"Hello, Leah," Kate said.

It sounded good-humored, but also a little dissatisfied. But was that a miracle? After all, I was standing here closely embraced with her fiancé.

Nanuk and I quickly disengaged from each other, and Kate led me down the hall to the dining room.

Susan and Shanti I saw handling in the kitchen, Chaske sitting in the armchair with a newspaper and Amarok coming down one of the stairs.

Everyone greeted me happily.

Akai knelt before me, pleading and begging.

I texted Dad that I wouldn't be home until later than planned because I would still be here tutoring biology.

The dinner went pleasantly, and it was really tasty.

The Lathams were a large and happy family. They chatted about all sorts of things.

Akai told a droll story from school. Phoebe had corrected the French teacher. In front of the whole class. So she had lost all credit with her now.

I had already noticed that Phoebe was a real talent when it came to languages.

At school she currently took French, Russian, and Spanish. She was already able to speak Portuguese and German, and she wanted to make friends with Chinese in the near future. She wanted to become an interpreter.

Chaske was an engineer and technical director of a metalworking company in Fryeburg.

Susan had delivered cake from her café there today, because his secretary had her fiftieth birthday over the weekend, and it was first celebrated with the entire staff. There was nothing left over.

Shanti had met with her gymnastics club as she does every Monday.

I was considerably taken aback.

This was called 'gymnastics with knives and forks'. I imagined it to be quite dangerous, if that was meant literally. But they explained to me that the ladies were all too old for gymnastics by now. Instead, they now met for lunch to exchange the latest gossip. How the parish priest of Cornish had dared to order his medicines online instead of buying them in the local pharmacy. A real scandal!

Shanti found it very amusing how some of her gym sisters could run their mouths about such things.

Since Amarok no longer practiced his profession, he had taken up a hobby. Model building of historical ships. There was a store here in town that sold them. Actually, he had just wanted to get some new glue. In the end, he spent half the day drinking coffee and chatting with the owner.

Happened to him probably more often.

Kate and Nanuk had been in Portland together to visit Tom's sister and her newborn. Yesterday, Sunday, all the baby's relatives would have announced themselves, so they hadn't wanted to show up there, too. It was so sweet and so tiny and so cute.

"But he's not as cute as the little Ced!" said Akai, who was looking at a picture on Kate's phone.

The two had to agree to that.

All the trivial stuff in a very chipper mood had really distracted me and I laughed a lot with my hosts.

At first, I had reminded myself to laugh at appropriate occasions, but it had quickly come as if by itself again and again.

I sat next to Nanuk the whole time, who kept giving me a very affectionate smile as he quite often looked to my side instead of the other where Kate sat.

A few times we had accidentally touched at the hands when we wanted to reach for something at the same time and each time I had the impression of getting a small electric shock. In the middle of a story, his hand was gently and quite by accident on my leg. It took us both a moment to realize that such a thing did not belong between us.

Okay, it occurred to him.

He took it away and murmured a soft "sorry" to me.

Everyone helped clear the table before dessert arrived.

I was already sitting again, chatting with Chaske about my study plans, while I noticed some movements in the corner of my eye.

Nanuk and Kate were cutely fooling around in the kitchen. They were both armed with ice cubes and chased each other around the cooking island and the small table.

"How old are you guys anyway?" asked Susan, pretending to be stressed, who was in the kitchen with them.

"She started it!" defended Nanuk defiantly.

I chuckled.

Sounded like a daredevil kid.

"It's not true at all!", didn't sound any more adult from Kate either.

"My father would like Jake and I to go to Dartmouth," I then replied to Chaske, somewhat delayed.

"Dartmouth?! Not a bad school," he said benevolently.

I looked again in the kitchen.

The young couple stood there, kissing devotedly as the ice cubes melted in their hands.

I quickly looked away again.

THAT was a harmonious relationship! Only I brought this a little confused. I hadn't forgotten what Akai had casually told me sometime on Saturday. That Nanuk and Kate had an enviable relationship in which there were actually never any serious disagreements. Jealousy, a boring daily routine that mercilessly brought individual quirks to light, the division of domestic tasks such as cooking, cleaning or washing, financial disputes because of differing priorities or whatever other long-term potential for conflict there was, played no role with the two of them, and yet they had already been living together in Boston for some time. So one thing was absolutely certain for me: I was not allowed to break up this relationship! Never! Marcus had broken up with me because he thought Nanuk and I had no choice at all. That we would be together at some point. I don't know whether he would be right or wrong about that. The only thing that was certain at the moment was how hard it really was for Nanuk and me to behave at times. However, this whole situation was new for us. In my opinion, that spoke quite clearly for Nanuk and me. We would learn to deal with it together and then the temptation would certainly disappear. Then we would be just friends. Very good friends, but still just friends. Perhaps Marcus would then also realize that he had possibly acted too hastily. Perhaps he would take me back when he saw that there was nothing between Nanuk and me but simple harmless, though intense, friendship. But could we learn that? I was not sure. In Nanuk's gaze alone, I was in danger of burning up many a time. So I would continue to fight without Marcus. If not for me, to save my relationship, then for Nanuk and his love for Kate.

"So how's Marcus doing? Did he get over Saturday's culture shock?" asked Susan cheerfully, coming back to the table with two large bowls of vanilla pudding.

Kate and Nanuk came after her, bringing cream, chocolate, and strawberry sauce.

Involuntarily I looked at my kneading fingers.

"Yeah, sure. He did. He's fine. He's at work," I answered trying to be casual and forced myself to smile cheerfully.

Nanuk's eyes twitched as he happened to look at me while he sat down.

"And you are often up there in the camp?", I asked immediately cheerfully after to change the subject.

It had worked and the family told. Only Nanuk was pretty quiet.

I had just emptied my bowl when I went into the bathroom.

My sleeve had somehow ended up in the chocolate sauce. I had passed the cream to Akai and Shanti had passed the pudding bowl to him, both of us chatting and looking at Amarok. The next thing I knew, I had felt a strange chill on my elbow.

I quickly pulled my blouse over my head and threw it into the sink.

That felt gross, maybe, the wet sticky stuff on my elbow.

I hadn't even really started washing out the sleeve when there was a knock at the door.

"Yes ...", I called out and Nanuk stood in the doorway.

"Need some help?" he asked, chuckling.

"No, it's okay," I smiled. Nothing else had happened and that the blouse was now dirty, was just bad luck. It just happened.

I continued rubbing the fabric together under the warm water when an even warmer hand came to rest against my back. Just below my back of the neck. Directly on my skin, which was exposed by my rather tight top.

Boah ... that tingled all at once.

I raised my eyes and looked at Nanuk in the mirror.

He didn't look as amused as he had four seconds before. More like attentive.

"Is everything okay with you and Marcus?" he asked.

"Sure thing."

"Really? I had the impression earlier that you lied and also wanted to change the subject very quickly, which you managed to do quite well with everyone."

Damn it! I should have expected that something like that would not escape him. I knew, after all, how he was feeling most of the time. But what should I say now? Definitely not the truth! I wouldn't tell Nanuk that Marcus had broken up with me. I didn't give a shit how I felt, but I shouldn't burden Nanuk with that. He was happy with Kate. If I told him now that I wasn't anymore, it would only prompt him to do something. To end his own happiness, possibly. Out of feelings of guilt, or simply because he saw it as an obligation through our imprinting. But I should not let that happen. He loved Kate and he had a right to his love, in which I only disturbed. I wish I could stay away from him so as not to stand in the way of Nanuk's happiness ... Mom was definitely right, I just realized too. I would be quite allergic to the word 'happiness' pretty soon! ... But what should I answer now ...

I turned to him to give credence to my chosen words.

"We just bickered a little yesterday and overslept this morning, so we haven't reconciled yet. But we will in a minute when he gets home from work!", I said with absolute conviction, grinning and winking mischievously so Nanuk would get an absolutely clear impression of how we were probably going to reconcile. Luckily, I was a better liar than Mom! "So don't worry about it! Everything will be fine with Marcus and me in a moment!", I continued to state and put a hand against his torso in a placating manner. Did I mention that Nanuk was only wearing a thin long-sleeved T-shirt? That wasn't nearly enough fabric to conceal his muscles and heat under my fingers. I thought I felt a distinct throbbing next to our heartbeats.

One of his hands laid over mine as if he never wanted to let it go from this position and our eyes met glowingly.

Eternities passed while the water in the sink was still running. Unable to move. Unable to let go of his eyes. Unable to hear anything but our harmonious heartbeats.

And then Akai came through the standing-open door.

"Excuse me," he murmured good-humoredly and pushed his way between us to the sink, in the process pausing briefly to look at his brother.

Akai washed his hands and then turned off the tap. While drying his hands, he muttered to himself in a disciplinary manner something about wasting water.

Nanuk and I paid little attention to Akai, except that we no longer touched each other and smiled at his always cheerful mood.

He jostled his way back between us, this time facing me, and raised his eyebrows once with a mischievous grin. He left, but let the door stand open.

I shook my head in amusement and turned back to my blouse.

"Akai has fabulous timing sometimes, don't you think?" asked Nanuk again in a chatty tone.

"Yes, but also an incredibly considerate yet teasing manner. I like him," I said, washing the last bit of pudding out of my sleeve.

Nanuk held up a towel for me and rubbed the fabric a little dry.

"But tell me, does Akai actually exist without any laughter?", I asked right away.

"Um ..." he began to ponder.

It took a while.

"I don't think so," he then said, and we left the bathroom laughing.

Nanuk brought me a sweatshirt, so I wasn't walking around here half naked.

Well. My top didn't have that little of fabric, but because of Kate's look at us, it was probably better that way. She had a quite critical look on it, even if he had been there only briefly.

The family was already comfortably spread out in the living room. The TV was on, but hardly anyone was really paying attention to the program.

Amarok and Chaske sat across from each other on the sofa playing a game of Backgammon. Kate and Susan were playing Solitaire at the dining room table. Shanti was nowhere to be seen.

"Coffee, Leah?" asked Susan as Kate just pulled out a card.

I nodded.

With a latte macchiato in hand, I walked back to the small room with Akai.

I had agreed to help with his homework. Biology. Genetics. Structure of DNA.

I quickly got into the subject, managed to explain it to Akai, and I then supervised how Akai did his homework correctly.

While he packed his school supplies, we got to chatting.

I wondered a little about this room.

It was nicely cut, with bookshelves set into the walls, a tall office cabinet, but no chairs or couches for reading. Only two desks with chairs.

"This used to be Grandpa's study. He was a self-employed architect and worked in here. When he retired, it became kind of our homework room, so we don't have the school stuff in the mess of our rooms, too. And it's still used as an office, so to speak. All of our family's paperwork is here in the closet," Akai explained to me. "He designed this house. One of his first works. Back then for him and Shanti, who was expecting a child, and his parents, who were still alive then. A few years ago he did another basic renovation and refurbishment – as his last work."

I got a little tour of the really nice house.

A classic Victorian design with modern elements. Warm wood met glass, stone, and metal. Three staircases led from the hallway behind the front door. One to the basement. One to the right to Shanti and Amarok's rooms, one to the left to his parents' chambers. In addition to bedrooms and bathrooms on each side, there were also small living/social and guest rooms. Two of these had once been Akai and Nanuk's children's rooms.

At one of them, Akai knocked on the ajar door.

Shanti was sitting there in a huge armchair, old music was playing, and it looked like she was sewing.

I had no idea about this.

As we moved on, I heard Shanti ask with feigned fright if Akai had cleaned his room for a change.

From the second floor, a staircase led further up. To the attic, which in the meantime had been completely converted. One door on the left, one on the right, and a little space in front of these doors.

"Thirsty?" asked Akai, pulling open a door on a sideboard.

A hidden refrigerator.

"So we don't constantly have to run all the way down."

I nodded to the offered Coke and Akai took two glasses for us from behind the door next to it.

Kind of reminded me of my room at Dad's house now, I thought, chuckling.

Akai went through the left door and held it open for me from the inside.

"But don't be alarmed. I should have cleaned up by now," he said sheepishly.

I stepped inside and took a quick look around.

"Mine doesn't look - I think - any better right now," I admitted, chuckling.

A nicely cut room. Attic, therefore with roof slopes. Two roof beams were more or less in the middle, wallpapered with photos. To the front of the house there were two doors. Behind one was a bathroom, behind the other a separate bedroom. Neither was particularly large, but very pretty and really thoughtfully furnished. In return, the actual room was quite spacious. Two floor-to-ceiling skylights facing the woods and a huge one on the straight side of the house. Below that was a fully equipped gamer space.

I knew it from Brandon. Desk, two monitors, mouse with countless buttons, gaming keyboard, headset.

A few computer magazines were also lying on the floor around the table.

"Pro-gamer?", I asked teasingly.

Akai screwed up his face.

"Just gamer. Without the Pro," he admitted.

Otherwise, there were a few chests of drawers and shelves as well as a small seating area. Overall, it was very cozy. Dumbbells lay in a corner, shoes were piled up under a chair, a calendar with very lightly dressed ladies was on the wall, a pennant of the 'Portland-Sea Dogs', a game console stood on the floor with some game cases lying messily next to it.

I looked at the pictures on the beams.

Akai in all walks of life. Trips with his parents, grandparents, friends. I also saw Phoebe a few times. I looked for a photo without his laugh. In vain. I got stuck on one with him and Nanuk. It couldn't have been too long ago. They each had an arm around each other's shoulders in a brotherly fashion and they were both looking at the camera with incredible charm.

"That was on Thanksgiving. The Saturday after, I went with him to Boston," Akai said.

I nodded but said nothing, still stuck in the dark eyes.

Akai leaned against the beam and looked at me extensively.

When I also noticed this at some point, I bristled.

Akai did not laugh at all.

"You'd think you were in the process of falling pretty hard for each other," he said attentively.

I nodded again.

"Yeah, one could," I sighed and looked at the picture again. Nanuk was almost perfect for my personal taste. He was handsome, tall and muscular and strong. His eyes were madness. As far as the looks alone. But beyond that, he was intelligent and likable. Charismatic and amiable. A pleasant mix of playful and reliable, family-oriented and independent. And as far as I could tell, unspeakably tender without being shy. The only catch was that he wasn't Marcus. "If we hadn't already found the right ones for us!", I clarified, though.

"You do seem to forget that now and then," he teased me, thereby smiling as usual.

"The imprint doesn't seem to pick people quite so randomly. Nanuk, unfortunately, is exactly the type of man who would please me. Plus the conditions of this supernatural power ... It is not easy to remember that you already have everything you need to be happy. At such moments as earlier, when you squeezed between us in the bathroom, everything else seems to slip into the background."

"About this telepathy thing, I've heard a lot from Nanuk. I can imagine it and then again not ... None of them down there dares to predict whether you can permanently manage to trick your bond in this way," Akai said.

"And what else do they say?", I asked curiously.

"Well. Everyone has an opinion, but no one can commit ... Kate has basically been part of the family for ages and is loved and appreciated by everyone here in their own way. In that respect, of course, everyone wants Nanuk and Kate stay together and also get married as planned ... On the other side is you, and although you found your way to us in a rather unconventional way, everyone already likes you quite a bit. Everyone sees what happens between you and Nanuk all the time. The thought that you could replace Kate is there. And everyone would accept it and even be happy about it in the end, so that this torment of both of you would come to an end."

I didn't know what to say to that now and sipped my glass.

Until I had finished my Coke, we chatted about insignificant things. A gingerbread heart hanging on the wall, for example. Or a Blu-ray that was lying in an armchair.

Good movie.

"Well, I'm going to run home. I have to study a bit for English before Marcus gets home from work," I said, pointing at a clock.

It wasn't half past eight yet, but I didn't want Mom to worry unnecessarily, since I actually wanted to come home right after dinner. Besides, I was certainly disturbing here.

Akai meanwhile pushed me into the neighboring room.

It was an exact mirror image of his and very similarly furnished.

"Little bro? Leah wants to go home," he called from the door he was already pushing me through.

This room was tidier than the one next door.

Nanuk was sitting on the floor in front of his sofa and had various booklets around him and a fully written pad in front of him on the low table.

"What's that?", I asked in amazement, pointing to the booklets.

He seemed quite embarrassed.

"How many fate points do you have like that?", I asked afterwards and grinned. 'The Dark Eye' scattered around him. Apparently he was putting together an adventure.

"Don't tell me you know it?" asked Nanuk, befuddled.

I nodded and turned to Akai.

"As I said earlier ...", I began.

"... the bond doesn't pick people completely at random!", Akai finished my sentence in amazement.

Nanuk had already gotten up and I took off my sweatshirt and handed it to him.

That put it right where it belonged.

"We'll take you home," he said as he tossed the sweatshirt carelessly behind him over an armchair.

"Oh nonsense," I waved off. I thought it was kind of silly. After all, I was no longer a little girl. Besides, the two of them surely had something else in mind, which I didn't want to stop them from doing.

"Don't answer back, Leah!" suddenly I had a stern index finger hanging so close to my face that I had to blink.

"You know. Protective instinct and all," Akai chuckled behind me.

I puffed contemptuously and went down the stairs.

The brothers stumbled the last few stairs rather behind me while they teased each other. They were eager to run through the forest. They had not done that yet today .

I said goodbye to everyone and thanked them for the dinner, which had been really good.

While running - Akai ran between us, as befitted a chaperone - Nanuk 'thought' that he and Kate were meeting up with old school friends on Saturday, and he would prepare 'The Dark Eye' adventure for that. Akai also liked fantasy games, but more virtually on the computer. This 'pen & paper' game was too high for him.

The fact that I didn't hear Akai's thoughts, I thought was kind of funny. Nanuk had to feel a little stupid when he translated his thoughts for me and mine for him.


At home on the terrace there were three bathrobes ready.

It was a sure thing that Dad had heard us coming.

I phased back, already reaching for mine.

"Hello, Leah," Mom greeted me with my baby brother in her arms.

"Li ah," he stretched his little arms out to me.

I took him, squeezed him, and kissed him on the forehead, but then hesitated slightly delayed.

"Did he just say Leah?", I asked. Or had I misheard?

"Yes, he did. In a manner of speaking," Dad announced, quite the proud papa, who nevertheless did not forget to greet me and gave me a kiss on the temple.

"We can't wait to hear what Ced says when Jake and Becky get here later," Mom commented.

No less enthusiastic.

"Li ah," Ced meanwhile brought home the message again.

I praised my baby brother.

"Good evening everyone," fiddled Akai cheerfully, who came in with Nanuk.

"Hello, you two," Mom said, stepping toward the brothers. "Are you hungry or thirsty?"

"Nah, thanks," Nanuk replied.

Dad peeked skeptically.

That wolves rejected something edible was bordering on miraculous.

"We only wanted to bring Leah home," Nanuk countered, amused by his look.

"Not that she'll get lost in the forest and eaten by wolves!" put in Akai.

"And YOU want to be able to protect me from that?", I questioned. "You'll have to grow a little for that first!", I teased him and ruffled through the puppy's hair.

He didn't think it was funny that I was ruining his hairstyle.

We held some more small talk together.

Was everyone well, how was the food, did little Leah behave well too, how Akai would cope with the exam preparations ...

Everyone wished each other a pleasant evening and then the wolves wanted to go on their way again.

"When is Marcus going to be at work next? I don't want to steal your time with him," Nanuk asked on the terrace.

"Wednesday. But the early evening shift. He'll be home around eight, eight-thirty," I lied. Well, actually, I wasn't lying at all. He actually had that shift, and he would be home at that time too. Only that didn't mean he would come here.

I felt Dad's gaze on the back of my neck.

"We could meet at the lake after dinner. Around seven o'clock?", I quickly suggested.

"Well, I have time," Akai replied chuckling and winking happily at me.

"Then you don't need me, do you?", Nanuk teased me.

"Nope, not really," I shrugged my shoulders.

He pulled me tightly into his arms.

"I'll be there," he promised in a whisper.

For a long time we stood like this and enjoyed the closeness of the other.

Until Akai tapped us on the shoulders.

"Um ... I promised Phoebe I'd come around. Today," he reprimanded us subliminally, but smiling.

We broke away from each other, Nanuk put his hands on my neck and gave me a soft kiss on the temple before turning away.

A little dreamily, I watched him afterwards as he disappeared into the woods behind our house.


"You didn't tell him about Marcus?" Dad asked quietly as I re-entered the house.

"No ... and I don't plan to!", I replied.

"Don't you think Nanuk might have a right to know about this somehow?" asked Mom cautiously.

"No! That's none of Nanuk's business at all. The fact that Marcus is no longer here is my problem, not his! I don't want him to possibly feel obligated to me because of that, just because he may persuade himself to have a guilty conscience or guilty feelings or whatever. He loves Kate and is happy with her. I'm not going to destroy that for him!" I replied emphatically.

"Okay," Mom raised her hands defensively. "And how are you?" she asked meekly after a little pause.

"Don't really know yet," I admitted. I hadn't thought much about Marcus after school, but now it was coming back. I missed him.

A lonely tear rolled down my cheek.

"Was he here?", I inquired.

"Yes, he was," Dad said, hugging me gently as I let my head hang because of his answer.

So Marcus had really been here. Had probably really taken all his things with him. Everything would be gone. Nothing would remind me of him anymore.

I went upstairs to my room.

Wanted to see that there was nothing more to see ... And that's exactly how it was. There was nothing left of him. The fact that he had really done it made me realize the finality and I began to cry.

Mom came once more, brought me a hot cocoa, tried to comfort me, but I wanted to be alone.

I just sat on my bed, looked at the things that were no longer there and cried to myself until I eventually fell asleep.


By Tuesday I was feeling better and no longer crying.

Well, at least not before I lay in my lonely room again in the evening. Since I usually didn't see Marcus during the day either, I hardly minded the days even now. What I had never experienced, I could not miss. The evenings and nights, on the other hand, were different. I knew those with Marcus and those were the hours in which everything threatened to collapse on me.

So I got the week over with, dragging myself from one day to the next, meeting with Nanuk and Akai on Wednesday, but dreading the weekend.


Thank you for reading!