Chapter 4: Aliens of London

Jack presses the button and the next episode begins.

The Tardis materialises. Rose and the Doctor get out into modern day London near Jackie's flat. Rose asks how long she has been gone and he tells her twelve hours.

"I wish." Rose sniggers.

"You're never going to let me live that down are you?" Ten whines.

"Nope. Not while you claim to be a good driver." She sticks her tongue out at him.

Rose, she says she won't be long, she's just going to visit her mom. The Doctor asks what she is going to tell her and Rose says she spent the night at a friends and tells him not to disappear. While Rose runs up the stairs to the flat, the Doctor spots an old poster half stuck to a concrete pillar. Police Appeal for Assistance. Can You Help? IN the flat Rose calls out that she is back and Jackie comes out of the kitchen dropping her mug of tea. It smashes on the floor. The Doctor finishes reading the poster and runs to the flat. The poster says - Rose Tyler has been missing from her home on the Powell Estate since 6th March 2005.

"I still can't believe mum blamed you for that." Rose says to Mickey.

"Well I was the last person to have seen you." He shrugs.

Rose is confused that Jackie is so surprised to see her. Jackie hugs Rose, who spots several different types of missing person posters on the table. The Doctor runs in and tells her it's been twelve months not hours.

Everyone bursts out laughing even though they knew it was going to happen.

"I thought you Time Lords always knew exactly what date it is, how come you didn't realise it had been a year?" Sarah Jane asks Ten.

"Well, I can, but only if I actually think about it. I mostly just assume the TARDIS takes me to the right place."

"That's working real well for ya." Donna snorts.

Outside, a young boy has spray-painted Bad Wolf on the side of the Tardis. Inside, astonishment has given way to fury, and a policeman has been called. Jackie is ranting that travelling is not a good enough answer to where Rose has been as her passport is still in the drawer. Rose admits she meant to phone but forgot and the Doctor tries to cover for her saying he employed Rose as his companion.

"I don't think that's gonna help, Doctor. Maybe if you were him." Jack gestures to Ten. "He at least looks a little closer to Rose's age." Nine doesn't comment and tries to focus on the fact that Rose said she prefered him this way.

The Policeman asks if it is a sexual relationship which they both deny.

"Na, they just wish it was." Jack sniggers.

"Normally I'd disagree with you as the Doctor is very strict about that kind of thing, but it is very obvious they do." Sarah Jane agrees with him. Nine, Ten and Rose all turn bright red.

Jackie is upset because he looks so much older than Rose and guesses he is in his forties.

"Not quite." Ten laughs.

"Only off by a bit." Sarah Jane agrees with a grin.

She then accuses him of finding Rose on the internet and pretending to be a doctor, he denies that saying he is a doctor. She tells him to prove it and then slaps him, hard.

"Wow. Nice right hook. Shame I missed that." Mickey laughs loudly. As both Doctors clutch their cheeks in remembered pain.

"I never did thank you for putting up with all of that. I know you don't do domestics but I was really grateful you stayed." Rose tells Nine.

"I wouldn't leave you alone to face that." He answers. "Tempting though it was.

Later, in the kitchen, mother and daughter are reconciled and Jackie is asking if Rose thought about her at all. She is then worried because Rose won't tell her what's been going on and where she has been. Up on the roof of the block Rose is talking to the Doctor and saying she can't begin to tell Jackie where she has been. Then she asks if the year she missed was any good and he tells her it was middling. The Doctor asks if Rose is going to stay as it has caused her so much trouble and she doesn't know.

"I hope you realised how worried I was when you said that." Nine grumbles. "You'd already made me ask twice I really didn't want to have to ask again. Only so much my ego can take."

"Don't worry. I wasn't really planning on leaving, it was just her reaction clouding my judgement." Rose assures him. "You're stuck with me long term."

The Doctor says Jackie is not coming with them and Rose agrees. He says he doesn't do families and Rose grins, pointing out Jackie slapped him. He is unimpressed stating that in nine hundred years he has never been slapped by someone's other. Rose is amused by his face and he protests that it hurt. She then asks about his comment on nine hundred years and he confirms that's his age. Rose states her mom was right, it's one hell of an age gap. She is just talking about how nobody on Earth knows about aliens so she can't talk to anybody when there is a deep horn and a spaceship, trailing black smoke passes overhead and heads for the city. It misses Tower Bridge, weaves around St Paul's, then with a nasty back-fire and a splutter, dives for the Thames, taking out the Clock Tower. Big Ben chimes once and the spaceship crashes into the river. The Doctor and Rose watch a plume of black smoke rise into the air on the horizon.

"Wait, I remember hearing about this, didn't it get ruled out as a hoax?" Martha asks looking confused.

"Yep." Nine grins.

"I so knew you would be in there." Sarah Jane laughs.

"Of course." Ten beams. "Crashing into the Thames? Perfect."

"In what way is that perfect?" Donna asks.

"It's interesting. A perfect way to get attention."

Naturally, the army have closed the roads, much to the annoyance of car drivers. The Doctor and Rose have no luck getting through. Rose asks if he knew it was going to happen or if he recognises the ship and he denies both questions. When he also denies knowing why it crashed she scoffs saying she is so glad he's around. He tells her this is why he travels, to see history being made. Rose says they can use the TARDIS to get closer but he disagrees stating than in an emergency like this it would be noticed. She then suggests they watch it on TV

"See? Didn't take you long to start trying to make me domestic." Nine complains.

"If it bothered you that much I could have just told you later what happened." Rose suggests.

"What and have you knowing more than me? Never." He teases.

News 24 is on the scene. They are reporting the crash and then it switches to US news channel AMNN for a few seconds and then goes back to News 24. Jackie brings in a mug for Rose and her friend Ru Chan, but not the Doctor, while saying she isn't going to make him welcome.

"Didn't exactly last long did it?" Rose sniggers.

"I even get a hug at some point." Ten tells his former self.

"Simply fantastic." He says sarcastically. "Didn't you also say she slaps you in the future?"

"Well yes. It's an interesting relationship." Ten looks sheepish.

The Doctor tells them he is trying to listen. TV cuts to outside 10 Downing Street and then to the bridge where the reporter says they've found a body of non-terrestrial origins. The gathering is turning into a welcome home party for Rose, with wine being served. Jackie is talking about who just asked her out while the Doctor tries to listen to the TV with a child on his lap who keeps changing the channel.

"Awww." Jack grins. "Clearly you get on so well with kids."

The news reporter says the body has been taken to Albion Hospital and the road has been closed off. The building had been evacuated. Inside the hospital the General marches along the corridor with an escort, and into the room where a dainty oriental physician is in attendance of a large lump under a white sheet. He asks to have a look and the physician pulls back the sheet. He asks if it is real and she confirms that she has x-rayed the skull and seen nothing like it before. She states nobody could make it up.

"No human could make it up." Nine corrects haughtily.

"Yes, yes smarty pants. Shut up." Donna tells him and he looks affronted but doesn't comment.

The general tells her to get it out of sight and the body is put into body cold chamber 5. Back at the flat the news is reporting that the Prime Minister hasn't been seen since the emergency began. A car pulls up outside Downing Street but it is only one of the MPs. Inside, Ganesh is introducing himself as the liaison and asks Green to follow him upstairs. They are interrupted by Harriet Jones.

"Good old Harriet Jones." Nine smiles. Ten looks far less thrilled by her appearance which Rose notes.

The men head up the stairs. Ganesh is asking if Green has heard about the body but Green only wants to know where the Prime Minister is. Ganesh admits that nobody knows. This makes Green acting Prime Minister. Green farts and then blames a nervous stomach. A well-built man and woman meet the two men outside an office and are introduced. The man states the Prime Minister's car literally vanished. Ganesh holds out a Ministerial Red Box telling them it contains actions to be taken in the event of an alien incursion. Green farts before taking the Red Box. They head into the room without Ganesh and puts the Box down on the table. They all start laughing.

"What's all that about? Those three are suspicious." Donna notes.

"Farting aliens disguised as human?" Martha questions. Nobody gives her an answer.

At the flat, Rose catches the Doctor as he is leaving and asks where he is going. He claims it's too human in the flat and he is going for a wander. Rose doesn't believe him but he states that the crash was just that and he doesn't interfere with history being made. Humans first contact with aliens. He tells Rose to spend some time with her mum and she asks him to promise not to disappear. The Doctor then gives Rose a key to the TARDIS and moves off.

"I'd never just leave you behind." Nine assures her. "Even if you tell me to leave I'll try to change your mind."

"Fat chance of that ever happening." Rose snorts.

"Good."

Mickey has gone out onto his balcony to check on the state of his trainers, and sees the Doctor walking back to the Tardis. He runs out of his flat as the Doctor goes inside the Tardis. It dematerialises causing him to crash full pelt into the corrugated iron shutters of the empty shop behind where the Tardis was parked. He tries to walk away nonchalantly.

"Nice one Ricky." Nine sniggers while Ten simply laughs out loud.

"Not sure that nonchalance really works." Jack laughs.

The Tardis is not happy in flight. The Doctor resorts to a large hammer to sort things out.

"I still can't believe you went without me." Rose frowns.

"I came back to get you for the interesting bit didn't I?"

In Downing Street Harriet Jones brings Ganesh a cup of coffee but he still won't let her into the room. They keep arguing into the trio emerges. Harriet immediately moves to ask Green to put her item on the agenda for the next Cabinet meeting. It has nothing to do with the aliens and he tells her to get some perspective.

"He does kind of have a point." Sarah Jane admits. Cottage hospitals aren't going to be the top of anyone's list right now, let alone the acting Prime Minister.

Ganesh grabs his jacket and follows the trio out. Harriet goes into the Cabinet Room and closes the door. She puts her proposal in the Red Box then notices the Emergency Protocols file inside it. She sits down and starts reading.

"I like her." Nine grins.

"Of course you do. You like anyone who is as nosy as you." Mickey rolls his eyes.

At the hospital Doctor Sato is looking over her notes when she hears a thumping noise coming from Body Cold Chamber number 5. The Tardis, meanwhile, has parked herself in a store room. The Doctor uses his sonic screwdriver on the door lock. Sato moves towards the chamber, and the thumping turns into a knocking. The Doctor walks into a room full of Red Berets. They stare at each other in silence for a moment, then the soldiers grab their weapons and point them at the Doctor. Something bursts out of the cooler, and Sato screams. Everyone hears it. The Doctor tells them all to move and leads the marines out of the room.

"It wasn't dead then?" Martha asks.

"Nope. Not the real alien either. That would be too easy and the Doctor doesn't do easy." Sarah Jane laughs.

The Doctor arrives in the morgue, telling the marines to check the perimeter and lock it down. He then asks Sato what it looked like. There is the sound of metal clattering and he realises it is still there. The Doctor gestures to a soldier outside the door to come in and kneel by Sato. Behind a filing cabinet is a pig like creature. The Doctor says hello and the pig runs out on its hind legs. It is wearing a spacesuit.

"What on Earth is that?" Mickey asks.

"No idea. Didn't get to examine it properly." Nine shrugs.

The Doctor tells the men not to shoot but one kills the pig. The Doctor is angry, asking what they shot it for as it was only scared.

"Humans are one of the most intolerant species I've ever met." Nine spits out in frustration. "You excepted." He adds quickly at Rose's offended expression.

In the Cabinet room Harriet hears voices from outside and packs away the documents. She runs to the door to see the General Asquith berating the Trio in the outer office. She looks for somewhere to hide. Harriet disappears into a cupboard just as they enter. Blaine, Green and Charles talk about how much fun they are having and then Margaret Blaine farts. The trio laugh, and fart almost continuously for a while. Asquith threatens to relieve Green of his duty as acting Prime Minister and put the country under marshal law. Green unzips his forehead, and a blue light pours out. Margaret and Charles do the same. Harriet watches, horrified, as we hear blubbery, squelching noises. General Asquith screams.

"Oh my god!" Martha looks horrified.

"What are they?" Donna asks.

"You'll find out." Rose smirk

Sata states the pig is just what she assumed aliens looked like. The Doctor explains that it's an ordinary pig that has had bits added to the brain and then been strapped to the ship. She realises it's a fake and wants to know why aliens would fake aliens. When she looks around for the Doctor he is already gone.

"You know it's really annoying when you do that." Mickey rolls his eyes.

"Do what?" Ten asked innocently.

"Disappear with no notice. You tell us all not to wander off then you go and do it yourself." Rose mock scolds.

"I know what I'm doing." He replies with a grin.

"Sometimes."

"Oi!"

The Tardis dematerialises. In the Tyler flat, everyone except Rose is toasting Martians. Mickey enters. Rose apologises to Mickey saying she meant to come and see him. Jackie's friend Ru is saying someone owes Mickey an apology and when Rose does, she claims that she means Jackie. Jackie protests asking what she was supposed to think.

"I still can't believe she blamed you for that." Rose rolls her eyes.

"I can." Mickey grimaces.

Mickey is upset and Jackie realises he knew about the Doctor. He then tells her the Doctor has left as he saw the TARDIS dematerialise. Rose runs out of the flat. Mickey follows her.

"Sorry. Thought I'd be back before you realised." Nine admits with a small grin.

Outside Rose is saying the Doctor wouldn't go as he promised but Mickey seems rather pleased that he has let her down. Rose denies that the Doctor is her boyfriend, claiming he is better than that. She shows off the TARDIS key which starts to glow as the TARDIS materialises. Rose tries to get Jackie to go inside.

"I'm glad you had some faith in me." Nine smiles.

"Course." Rose grins back.

In the TARDIS, the Doctor is apologising for going off but explaining he could tell the crash was too perfect and he had to go and look. Rose points out her mother is there and he tells her not to make the place domestic.

"Just cos things have changed, doesn't mean that has. Still no making my TARDIS domestic." Nine warns Rose.

"So no carpets then? MIght make for softer landings when you crash." She sticks her tongue out at him.

"Definitely no carpets." Nine and Ten say together.

"So does this mean that in future when we get accused of being together we don't have to deny it anymore? Everyone we meet already assumes we are."

"Yeah, no more denying it." Nine grins happily.

"Finally." Mickey laughs.

"Well, now I have an answer to how disappointed I should be." Jack winks at Rose.

"Very." Nine tells him firmly.

Mickey claims the Doctor ruined his life and the Doctor doesn't seem bothered by this. Mickey continues that he bets the Doctor can't even remember his name. He claims that he can and calls him Ricky. Mickey argues with him, saying he thinks he knows his own name and the Doctor thinks he is stupid. Jackie starts to leave and Rose tells the Doctor not to go anywhere and not to start a fight before running after Jackie.

"Why do you assume it would be me starting the fight?" Nine whines.

"Cos you're good at annoying people." Sarah Jane laughs.

Back on the TARDIS Rose comes back and asks if it was a real spaceship which the Doctor agrees with. Mickey points out it's a funny way to invade, by putting the world on high alert. In the flat, Jackie is in her bedroom watching the TV. She sees the helpline number come up and rings it saying she has seen an alien and describes the Doctor.

"Oh my god." Rose buries her face in Nine's chest.

"Actually, it's a good thing she did. Got us to Downing Street." Nine points out rather grudgingly.

Someone types The Doctor into a database search. Over in Downing Street, an alarm goes off. Ganesh's computer screen is flashing Red Alert - The Doctor. On the TARDIS Rose and Mickey are chatting until the Doctor cuts in saying he can follow the flight of the spaceship. He realises the ship came from Earth not space.

Why go up just to crash?" Sarah Jane asks.

"Someone is looking to get something out of using the hoax. They wanted to be noticed, so they want the world on red alert." Jack says.

"How do you know that?"

"I used to be a conman." He shrugs.

The skin of Oliver Charles is thrown over the back of a chair, and General Asquith stands up. He asks how the compression in and then farts. Margaret says they really need to fix the gas exchange. Asquith states he rather liked being Oliver as he throws the skin into Harriet's cupboard. As they leave Ganesh comes up and tells them they have a code nine alarm. Harriet comes out of the cupboard to listen.

"She's bold, I'll give her that." Donna notes with a smile.

"A bit too bold sometimes." Ten mutters under his breath.

Asquith asks what a code nine means and Ganesh explains they've found the Doctor who is an expert in extra-terrestrial affairs and saying they need him now. In the TARDIS, Mickey and Rose are channel hopping, asking the Doctor how many channels he gets and they find the news which is saying the government is bringing in alien specialists. The Doctor tells the two that it means UNIT and Mickey tells Rose that the Doctor used to work for them. Rose asks why he doesn't go and help and he claims they wouldn't recognise him.

"So I take it you've regenerated since you worked for them?" Donna asks.

"Yep." Nine nods.

"How many regenerations have you had?" Martha asks Ten.

"This is my tenth body and that's my ninth." He replies.

"I suppose in nine hundred years that's a reasonable number." Rose shrugs.

The Doctor states that with everyone talking about aliens, he'd rather go undercover and keep the TARDIS out of sight. He tells Mickey he can drive as the roads are clearing. They walk out of the Tardis and straight into a helicopter spotlight. Police cars and Saxon armoured personnel carriers surround them. Mickey runs. Jackie comes out of the block of flats calling to Rose but a soldier grabs her. Mickey hides behind some dustbins and the soldiers run straight past. The Doctor tells them to take them to their leader.

"I bet you've wanted to say that for so long." Rose rolls her eyes.

"Maybe." Nine agrees with a wide grin.

In the police car, Rose is saying that if she knew being arrested was this posh she'd have done it years ago. The Doctor tells her they are being escorted not arrested. When she asks where they are going he says Downing Street. She asks why they are being escorted there and he admits Mickey was right. He has been on Earth a number of times and been noticed, saying that they are gathering alien experts and asking who the biggest expert it. Rose claims it's Patrick Moore and the Doctor is slightly offended. He then asks who the Prime Minister is and Rose says she doesn't know as she missed a year. The Doctor mugs for the cameras outside Number Ten.

"Of course you would do that." Mickey snorts.

"That's not like you. You're quite camera shy normally." Sarah Jane raises an eyebrow.

"I might have got a bit carried away." Ten admits sheepishly.

"If you got carried away when you were him, I dread to think what you'd be like in this body." Donna laughs at him.

"Oi!"

"You have to admit, you're a bit hyper." Martha agrees.

In the flat, Jackie is talking to a policeman, asking if Rose is in any trouble. He assures her that Rose and the Doctor might be in a position to help the country. The fat policeman sits down, and his stomach makes an unpleasant noise. He then tells the other two police officers that he needs to talk to Mrs Tyler on his own and they leave.

"Well, at least I know where you get your jeopardy friendliness from." Nine sighs.

In the waiting room in Downing Street, Harriet comes downstairs and shows her ID to an armed policeman. She mingles with the UNIT officers and large people in the room. Ganesh asks everyone to convene and to make sure they have their ID cards, handing the Doctor one. He states that Rose doesn't have clearance so she can't go in and the Doctor says he doesn't go anywhere without her. He keeps saying Rose will stay with him but she tells him to go on in.

"Good thing really. Although you wouldn't have had an ID card so you'd have been alright." Nine mumbles.

"What?" Rose asks.

"Nothing. You'll find out in a second."

Harriet Jones comes up asking if he is the Doctor. Ganesh tells her to go home and she states she needs a word in private. The Doctor goes into the room with UNIT in and Ganesh says he will need to leave Rose with security but Harriet offers to look after her. In the briefing room, the Doctor rapidly scans the prepared papers. Harriet asks Rose if her friend is an expert and then starts crying.

"I don't blame her. Things would be much simpler if she could tell people what she heard." Martha sighs.

"Nobody would believe her anyway." Ten shrugs.

Asquith begins the meeting and the Doctor pipes up and begins talking about a satellite in the North sea that detected a signal three days beforehand. He points out that it was just about to be investigated when the ship crashed into Big Ben.

"Convenient timing." Jack scoffs.

"So this is all just a cover up for some other aliens in the North sea?" Asks Donna but she doesn't get an answer.

In the Cabinet room, Harriet is telling Rose about what she saw and Rose tells her that she believes her. Rose begins searching the room for alien technology. She opens a cupboard and a body falls out. Ganesh comes in and starts telling off Harriet before he spots the body and realises it's the Prime Minister.

"Why didn't they use his body?" Donna asks.

"Too small. They need a conversion device but they are still very big so can only be inside big humans." Ten replies.

In the conference room the Doctor has worked out that it's not a diversion, it's a trap to get all the alien experts together. Margaret has found Rose, Harriet and Ganesh in the Cabinet room asking who has been naughty. In the flat, Jackie is still talking to the policeman who removes his cap while she is in the kitchen and undoes the zip on his forehead.

"Oh great." Rose mumbles, despite knowing her mom gets out safely thanks to Mickey.

In the Cabinet room Ganesh is claiming it's impossible because the Prime Minister left Downing Street hours ago. Margaret points out he knows that because she told him that. Then she reaches for her hairline. Screen cuts back to the Doctor who is still talking when Green farts. The Doctor asks him not to fart while he is saving the world. Asquith removes his cap and unzips his forehead and an alien wriggles out of the skin suit while Margaret does the same in the Cabinet office. Jackie comes out of her kitchen to see a similar sight. The aliens stand nearly eight feet tall with incongruous large black eyes in small baby faces. Asquith claims they are the Slitheen. Margaret grabs Ganesh and pushes him up the wall while Green thanks UNIT for wearing their ID badges. He holds up a remote activation and the ID cards emit electric shocks. The screen goes blank.

"That can't be the end!" Martha cries.

"It's not the end of that adventure. These films all seem to be about the same length so I'm guessing this is split into two parts or maybe more." Jack informs them.

"Well let's carry on, I want to see how this ends." Donna says quickly.

"One more then it's probably time to see if this place provides anywhere to sleep. No idea what time you guys were taken but it was almost the middle of the night where I came from and I'm knackered." Jack yawns. As he is talking doors begin appearing on one side of the room with names on. Everyone has one each except Nine and Rose who are sharing.