The Curious incident of the dog in the night-time.

A Radical Solution, chapter three.

Albus Dumbledore stared out the diamond paned window of his office at the Scottish night. He clasped his hands behind his back and sighed.

He turned back to his desk and signed a parchment, and stamped it with a stamp from his drawer. He rolled up the parchment, and went to the fireplace, threw in floo-powder, and prepared to interrupt a perfectly peaceful night.

"Digglesbury" he called out, and stuck his head into the flames.

Daedalus's sitting room was a jewel-box of Victorian excess. Albus would have sighed, but he spat out ash instead "Daedalus!" he called out.

Daedalus, in a scarlet smoking jacket and slippers, got up out of a very comfy chair and came to the fireplace and stared. He looked old, and round-headed and a bit confused. Albus noticed people looked confused a lot.

"Albus?" he asked.

"Daedalus. I'm about to do something very stupid for good reasons." said Albus.

Daedalus slowly knelt at the fire. "Is it about Cornelius?"

"No" said Albus. "I need a witness for a statutory declaration. I will take you to the person making the declaration, you will witness it, and we will depart. I would appreciate your discretion in this matter."

"Discretion?" asked Daedalus. "Is this about something illegal?"

"It may appear so." said Albus. "But greater issues are at stake."

"Aren't they always, with you" said Daedalus "Will I need shoes?"

"Shoes yes, a cloak will suffice." said Albus.

"Really? Casual visit to witness a declaration."

"If you would come to my office by floo, Daedalus. I must call the person making the declaration."

"And?"

"Persuade them to help me"

"While I put my shoes and socks on?"

"I expect so" said Albus.

"You are quite mad you know," said Daedalus, sitting down, "I'll give you fifteen minutes"

"I will only need five." said Albus "Daedalus… tomorrow I many no longer be Chief Warlock."

Daedalus frowned "Are you going to be arrested?"

"Not if you don't talk" said Albus, and he smiled.

"I should have gone to Hufflepuff. You are a bad influence" said Daedalus, slowly getting to his feet.

"Perhaps" said Albus. "See you soon. We're going to make history."

"Oh great." said Daedalus, sounding unenthusiastic.

Albus pulled his head out of the green flames, and took a few deep breaths.

"Number Twelve, Grimmauld place" he called out, and stuck his head into the flames once more.

The kitchen of Grimmauld place was only dimly lit – the lamp over the table only had one flame burning.

Albus called out "Kreacher!"

The ancient, crooked old house-elf climbed out of a cupboard by the stove, and padded over the chipped black-and white tiles to the fire.

"Bignose" croaked Kreacher.

"Kreacher. I need to speak with your master right away." said Albus.

"Sod off bignose" croaked Kreacher.

"Kreacher, is that the sort of language a house-elf from an ancient and respectable house uses?" asked Albus.

"Bad master says Kreacher should speak his mind." said Kreacher. "And that Kreacher is a useless thing, a bad elf."

"Kreacher I am about to come and visit Mr Black to take a statutory declaration as the Chief Warlock of the Wizengamot. You will find your master and have him waiting for me." said Albus.

"Chief Warlock?" asked Kreacher "Bignose is Chief Warlock?"

"I am also," said Albus modestly "The Supreme Mugwump of the I.C.W."

"Bignose is a stupid half-blood" said Kreacher.

"Thank you for speaking your mind, Kreacher." said Albus. "Now, Mr Black. After tonight he stands some chance of being a free man. Which" Albus paused "Would mean he likely would leave Grimmauld place, and may never return."

Kreacher turned his head and stared at Albus with one rheumy, yellowing eye. "And the bird-lion?"

"And the bird-lion. Yes" said Albus. "I will personally clean up the mess."

Kreacher tilted his head. "And… no blood traitors in the house again" he said.

"And that, yes" said Albus.

Kreacher vanished with a pop.

Seconds later, he reappeared, with a naked Sirius Black tangled in a bed-sheet.

"Aggh! Help! My house-elf's gone mental!" cried Sirius.

"Not completely" said Albus over the floo network, and he pulled his head out, stood up very slowly, wincing, and stepped through the flames into Grimmauld place.

Sirius Black was standing, wrapped in a bedsheet. He stared at Albus through bloodshot eyes.

"Why are you here?" he asked.

"I have a favour to ask of you. " said Albus.

"A favour?"

"I have been given a reference to a certain… magical ritual that would… would make Voldemort much less of a threat. It's quite possible it would defeat him outright." said Albus.

"And?"

"Your family might have a book that covered it in some detail. The Black family have a reputation." said Albus. "I will, of course be making a statutory declaration exonerating you."

"So I do what you need and… you'll get me off? You'll be tossed out as Chief warlock."

"I expect so, but it won't matter as much. The battle will be over, before Tom realises it has begin."

"Who's Tom?"

"Voldemort was born Tom Marvolo Riddle." said Albus. "He was a prodidgy at Hogwarts, but he has, I fear, imperilled his very soul."

"That hardly sounds ominous at all" said Sirius. "So… what's the ritual?"

"The reference I have is that it's in a Gringotts cursebreaker field handbook." said Albus.

Sirius sighed "Well that's going to be a problem. Those thing s are guarded like – "

Albus pulled a grey canvas covered book out of a robe pocket "My informant also told me where it could be found."

"If you've got the book, what do you need our library for?" asked Sirius.

"It might have escaped your notice, but Hogwarts had not taught ritual magic in centuries. I have no idea what the book is not saying, but that I must know."

"So… you thought you'd get a crash course on rituals from the old family library?" asked Sirius, lifting his eyebrows.

"In so many words yes… and your family would have the necessary equipment and materials." said Albus.

Sirius scoffed "No, we'll need to buy fresh ingredients. The first rule of ritual magic is to use fresh ingredients – and the bigger the effect, the more you need to put into it."

Albus frowned "Sirius Black are you intimating that you have knowledge of ritual magic?"

"Well, first it was just little things, then me and James wanted to become Animagi. The, well James had this hair-brained scheme to alter fate."

Albus paled. "To… alter fate?" he asked, clutching at his own beard.

"Didn't work. All of us worked on it, but in the end James just tried being a responsible head boy and that got Lily onside."

"James…. Potter did rituals?"

"Well, only the two" said Sirius. He sighed "We really tried on the fate altering one, I spent thousands on emeralds for it, just for a small change, but in the end, it didn't work and James impersonated a less sad git Remus instead."

"How on earth did you and James find that?"

"In the restricted section. His cloak gets through old Pincey's warning charms. A bit of banishing, and the whole team could go shopping for spells."

Albus stared at Sirius and blinked slowly. "I fear I underestimated the amount of trouble you, Remus, James and Peter could get up to." Sirius smiled a cracked, crazed smile.

Albus frowned "I will definitely need to read that before we attempt this. And as you're teaching the course, I will have to look at your memory of the event."

"Look at my what?"

"I have a pensive. It allows one to view memories. The charm to remove a single memory is fairly easy to learn, and I would feel safer if I reviewed a failure of yours, in order to ensure this ritual does not fail. We only have one special ingredient, and I have no way of finding another."

"One try, of a ritual you've never done before?" asked Sirius. "Shit."

"If the very worst came to the worst, there is one more possible ingredient, but I do not wish to risk it."

"Two or one?" asked Sirius "That sort of thing would help a lot."

"The second is complicated, and neither of us wants it damaged." said Albus.

Sirius frowned "Are you completely mad?" he asked.

"I fear circumstances will force me to act in a seemingly irrational way" nodded Albus.

"That's not… that different to usual." said Sirius, lips pursed. "I'll help, but only if I get a pardon."

"You would put your own well-being ahead of the safety of Britain?"

"Mine no – Harry's yes." said Sirius. "I messed up at Halloween back then, and I'm dammed if I'll stand by and let anything weird happen to him again!"

"Ah" said Albus. "I fear you need to, as his 'responsible adult guardian' be informed. I am Harry' s headmaster – "

Sirius closed the gap to Albus in a flash, and had a hand knotted in his beard "IF he is hurt, so help me, Albus fucking Dumbledore, I will end you!"

"Harry has suffered some minor… self-inflicted injuries." said Albus.

"Self. Oh god" Sirius blinked. "Oh god no." croaked Sirius.

"Calm yourself. And perhaps let my beard go."

Sirius let Albus got and retreated to sit on a chair he pulled from under the kitchen table. He sighed "We'll get a mind healer. I don't care what it costs – he's more important –"

Albus interrupted. "Harry is in fairly good spirits. I need to explain."

"Yes, get on with it"

Albus explained.

"HE… he sent cursed scars to himself? Who does that!" said Sirius. Albus looked over the runic tattoo's all across Sirius's exposed chest.

"They were a message" said Albus. "From himself, to himself. How to defeat Voldemort, well most of the details, and also… the identity of his one true love."

"He what?"

"Harry was not the only student to get a scar on Halloween" said Albus. "The name of witch in his year appeared on his wrist, and his on hers."

Sirius rolled his eyes "Pull the other one, it's got bells on!"

"Miss Daphne Greengrass sent her love in a coded message below the names. Ingeniously, the message was split in two parts, half on each wrist."

"Not the bushy haired friend then?" asked Sirius, frowning.

"No." said Albus.

"All this… Voldemort stuff's on his wrist?"

"No" said Albus. "His back. A very concise list written in cursed scars. It's in much better shape than the coded message. Something has distorted most of the message on Harry's wrist, while the message on his back merely has some blurring."

"Right. you do realise this sounds like some ghastly romance novel?"

"Well, in a sense, they sent a romantic message across the space between, " Albus paused "Possible universes."

"Possible universes?" asked Sirius.

Albus shrugged "I have no great knowledge of it, but the information is sound, we've got two of seven already."

"That's less than half."

"The second one, is Harry."

"What?"

"Harry sent the message to tell us. He survived and did not see fit to add a warning to the advice. I judge that it's safe enough."

-==0==-

Albus Dumbledore walked a very large black dog on a silver leash down Diagon Alley.

The dog was huge, and its huge paws broke up the reflections on the cobble-ringed puddles.

It was quite late, but a few people were loitering, or leaving restaurants, and they stared at Albus, who waved "Taking my new dog for a walk" he said.

The very large black dog stopped and lifted a leg, and peed all over the front door of 'Dewey Screwem and Howe', one of Magical Britain's finest law firms.

"Walk on" said Albus, and the dog strutted off, leaving a large, fragrant puddle.

The madman and his dog entered Gringotts. The door guards grumbled something, and Albus replied in Gobbdigook.

Albus walked into the tellers hall and all the way to the first, and only teller open, waited for two vampires to complete their withdrawals, and they left holding bottles of red liquid.

"Key Please" said the Teller.

Albus took the collar off the large dog, which flowed upwards into Sirius Black, with his hair in a pony-tail, wearing a black cloak over an embroidered burgundy vest.

"I've lost it" said Sirius. He jerked his thumb at Albus, who reached into his robe pocket, and dumped a moneybag on the counter. He picked out seven galleons.

Sirius stuck his hand out over the counter "Get on with it" he said.

The goblin teller reached under the desk, and got out a form, which they filled in painstakingly.

"It's Gringotts policy to charge seven galleons for replacement of lost personal keys" they said. Albus tapped the pile of galleons. "We came prepared" he said.

The goblin snatched the galleons, and bit every single one, and only then deposited them in a cash drawer. They took out a blank brass-coloured key, and put it on the counter-top, and crooked a finger at Sirius.

Sirius put his hand over the key, and the goblin's clawed finger cut his palm. Red blood dipped onto the counter, and the key sucked it up, and slowly turned golden, and developed warding on its bit.

Sirius drew a wand, and tapped his palm, healing the cut. He picked up the key.

"Right" said Sirius "I'm formally requesting the Black family primary account holder key."

"Key please" said the goblin.

Sirius handed it over, and the goblin sniffed it. "There will be a ninety galleon handling fee" they said.

"Bill me, Goblin. Get on with it." said Sirius.

The goblin dropped Sirius's key on the counter, and pulled up from under the counter a small sign marked 'CLOSED.' They left without saying anything.

"This is going quite well" said Albus.

"You're assuming they actually give me the sodding key" said Sirius. "Ninety galleons!"

The goblin returned five minuted later, carrying a large iron key, which they tossed onto the counter.

Sirius picked it up and inspected it – there were three ravens carved on the shaft.

"I want a list of every Black account, and I want it right now" said Sirius.

"Statements are mailed out on the third day of the month" said the goblin.

"You know who I am, Goblin." said Sirius, and he slapped the key into his palm "And that I control one of the biggest set of accounts in Gringotts?"

"Statements are mailed out on the third day of the month" said the goblin.

"Fine" said Sirius "I'm closing Bellatrix Black's account." he said "And after I've looked at it, what I leave behind is going into my vault. Is that clear?"

"Crystal" said the goblin. "Vault closures for high security vaults are eighty galleons, and vault transfers are a hundred galleons per hundredweight."

"The vault. Now. Goblin" said Sirius tersely.

"You have to sign" said the goblin, and they slowly hand-wrote a form from blank parchment with a quill.

Sirius sighed dramatically, and Albus took a paper bag out of his robe pocket, and picked out a white sugar mouse, and ate it.

"Ice mice?" Albus offered.

"Got any liquorice?" asked Sirius.

"No" said Albus.
"Gringotts can provide liquorice for a notional fee" said the goblin.

"Shut up and write you poxy little git" snapped Sirius.

The goblin wrote even more slowly. A queue of dark-cloaked figures was forming behind them.

"Get on with it!" said someone behind Sirius rudely.

Sirius turned, and smiled "Do you know who I am?" he asked.

"It's Sirius Black!" squealed the tall, dark-cloaked figure and they fled.

Sirius turned back to watch the goblin being annoyingly slow.

"This is going to get more annoying" said Sirius.

"I am prepared" said Albus, and he took out a scroll.

He turned around "I am, as you probably know, Albus Dumbledore, Chief warlock. Poor Sirius Black here was unjustly imprisoned, and has been freed. I have, right here, a copy of his actual official pardon. So there's no need to panic."

The row of mysterious persons queued up behind them muttered, and then one said "Well get a move on!"

"Alas, Gringotts security requires diligence and thoroughness" said Albus, and he smiled broadly "Which is why we use Gringotts, of course."

"Some of us only have till sunrise, you great berk!" complained one cloaked figure.

"Alas, I do not personally have control over how long Gringotts take to fill out a simple form" said Albus. "And I would not dream of harassing the staff."

"Oy shorty!" shouted someone from the queue "Get a move on or I'll eat you!"

Albus smiled cheerily and turned to watch the goblin finishing filling in the form remarkably hastily.

"Sign here" they said, and handed Sirius a quill.

Sirius signed 'Sirius Ozymandias Black' with a flourish. "I will see the vault right now, Goblin." said Sirius.

"Ozymandias" mused Albus.

"Look on my works, ye mighty and despair" said Sirius, taking the form and walking off to the entrance to the mines.

"Hmm. Shelly" said Albus, catching up. Behind them, a white, clawed hand was holding the goblin teller by the throat while the cloaked figure threatened them.

"Mother wanted something magisterial" said Sirius "Father remarked when I was fourteen that it was in fact a rather deuced bit of divination on her part." He paused "She was not impressed." he added.

A goblin came out of the mineshaft interference "Black Vault?" they asked.

"Bellatrix Black's vault" said Sirius, handing over the form "Pre closure inspection. Get on with it."

"Bring a lamp, we'll need clankers." grumbled the goblin.

The cart rocketed down the rails for an absolute age in complete darkness. Albus's beard blowing behind him.

"You could go faster you know" said Sirius loudly.

"Only one speed" said the goblin.

The pale, rheumy-eyed dragon recoiled from the clonking brass bells.

"Why is the unlamented miss Black's vault a high-security vault?" asked Albus, as the goblin opened it by stroking the door.

"Oldest daughter. She had two younger sisters with light fingers" said Sirius "That's the official reason. Unofficially she wanted somewhere to stash dark magical shit."

The door swung open and the lamplight lit stacks of coins, gold plate, and open-fronted cupboards full of objects.

Albus waved his wand, and the room glowed purple.

"Everything is cursed" said Albus.

"Yeah" said Sirius "Sort of expected that."

Albus lifted his wand and gave it a complicated flick, and the room shimmered momentarily; afterwards only the larger items and assorted things on shelves glowed.

Sirius pocketed a large necklace.

Up on a high self there was a small golden cup with a badger in relief on the side. Apart from the virulent purple glow it looked quite innocent.

"Is that it, do you think?" asked Sirius.

"That is almost certainly Hufflepuff's fabled cup" said Albus "Alas, soiled."

Alb us conjured a sack and scooped it up without touching it, and pocketed the sack.

They left the vault and the goblin pushed the door shut. "Being the lamp" they grumped.

They were halfway across the tellers hall, headed for the door, when Sirius did an abrupt U-turn and joined the queue for the only teller on shift.

Albus Dumbledore followed quietly then asked, once they were standing still in the queue "Something you forgot?"
"A little family business I need to attend to" said Sirius "Wouldn't want to let the loyalty of my family members go unrewarded."

Albus blinked and hummed to himself.

Some time later, they got to the goblin teller.

"Key please" said the Teller.

Sirius reached into his pocket and handed over the large iron key.

"Sirius Black, primary account holder for the Black family" said Sirius in a slight drawl. "I want the Narcissa Black account restricted – no more than a hundred galleons a week."

"Anything else" said the goblin, scribbling on parchment.

"Yes" said Sirius "Transfer ten thousand galleons to Andromeda Tonks's account. The reference is 'dear cousin.'

The goblin blinked "Anything else?"

"I want the statements for all accounts sent out to me this week. It would be a real shame to have to move the accounts to Zurich." said Sirius.

"Understood" said the goblin, stabbing the parchment with their quill.

"Look forward to seeing you again later" said Sirius, picking up the key, and he turned and headed away from the counter.

"Do you really think that your cousin Narcissa would still be using her childhood account?" said Albus,.

"Oh Cissy will have a rainy day fund in there. I guarantee it. Spoilt little brat" he said.

When Albus and Sirius went to leave the bank, they were confronted by a line of red-cloaked Aurors standing just outside the building.

"Sirius Black" said the central Auror. His badge said 'Peirce.'

"Ah. Captain Peirce" said Albus "If you would read this official document," Albus took the scroll from his pocket and unrolled it, and held it, like a proclamation.

Perice's eyes narrowed. "This is highly irregular" he said.

"And yet, it is witnessed, signed by me, as Chief Warlock, and stamped with my official stamp" said Albus. "A more orthodox document could hardly be imagined."

"But he killed those muggles – and Pettigrew!" said Peirce.

"And served twelve years in Azkaban without a witness to his crimes, or a body for poor Peter Pettigrew. This is a writ of habeas corpus." said Albus "I feel that the time is right. If you, and your men would step aside… Mr Black and I have urgent business elsewhere."

"What… if you're not really Albus Dumbledore" said Peirce.

"Then I am a rather brave impostor" said Albus "FAWKES, TO ME!" he called.

Above them, a fireball exploded, and a large red and gold bird hovered, then landed on Albus's shoulder. Albus stooped a little. "Fawkes, have you gained weight?" asked Albus to the bird.

"Caaa" cawed Fawkes.

"I am quite sure I am not getting more doddery, Fawkes." said Albus sharply.

"Praaa" cawed Fawkes.

"Well, unless as an impostor, I also have a Phoenix called Fawkes" said Albus "I rather think that establishes my bona-fides. There is always the option of attempting to duel me… should you wish to further verify my identity?"

"There are six of us and only one of you!" said Peirce.

"Yes, you are a trifle outnumbered" said Albus. "Honestly, Ferswith, you were a keen student, but you simply have to realise that things have changed."

"The Minister will see this as a blatant attempt to seize control" said Perice.

"I fear Cornelius will overreact" said Albus mildly, nodding.

Sirius took a large gem-studded necklace out of his cloak pocket

"Captain Paircem, I believe the Aurors have a Widows and orphans fund" said Sirius "Here is a modest little donation" He dropped the necklace on the ground.

Albus and Sirius walked past the now disorganised Aurors.

After they'd walked a few yards Sirius said quietly "I have become my father" he sighed "Swore I'd never do that."

"Oh hardly" said Albus "Orion would never have given the Aurors widows and orphans fund that much. He was a parsimonious man."

Once they were well-clear of Gringotts, Albus held Sirius by one elbow "Now, Mr Black, you are about to experience something…. A little different. Fawkes… to my Office, if you would?"

"Praaak?" croaked Fawkes.

"Yes. I will give you a hot chilli" said Albus, with a sigh.

They disappeared with a flash of flame.

"Are you completely mad?" asked Sirius after the flames subsided, only to discover he was somewhere else. Albus's office at Hogwarts.

"Wow" said Sirius.

"Yes. Rather marvellous, aren't you Fawkes. Yes you are." said Albus. He took a key from his robe-pocket and unlocked a desk drawer, then took out a metal box, and cast a spell silently over it, his wand moving from side to side. The box clicked once.

Then Albus took a different key, and unlocked the box, and picked out a bright red chilli, and handed it up to Fawkes, who flew off to his perch with it in his beak, then gobbled it in barely a second.

Albus sighed, closed the box, locked it, cast a spell on it, and put it back in the drawer, and locked it.

"Just.. .to stop him taking chillies?" asked Sirius.

"They give him the runs" said Albus tiredly. "And you ate that much too quickly!" he added, for Fawkes's benefit. Fawkes tucked his head under his wing.

"Now" said Albus, taking out the sack and dropping the cup on the floor with a 'bong,' "This is one of the ritual anchors we can use."

"And not Harry" said Sirius.

"I think we would both prefer that he lived without being used in a largely experimental ritual." said Albus.

"Yes" said Sirius. "Do you want to keep that here?"

"Well, there's one at your house already" said Albus. "Could… the ritual take place there? Hogwarts is not… I don't want to risk this here."

"Think you're about to get a minder from the ministry?" said Sirius.

"I suspect that today will be the day Cornelius discovers he cannot have me removed as Headmaster." said Albus.

"So he will as a helpful member of the board" said Sirius "Like Abraxas."

"Abraxas is dead" said Albus. Sirius smiled.

"But Lucius has taken a seat" said Albus tiredly. "Did you really have to forment discord at the Malfoy's home?"

"Yes" said Sirius "Any of them could have got me out of Azkaban in a second with our lawyers."

"Lawyers you urinated on the door of" said Albus.

"It's played on my mind a little" said Sirius. He sighed. "They'll be after me, of course. Relentlessly."

"I think your will be safe enough at Grimmauld place " said Albus. "Even Lucius Malfoy's … associates would doubtless find it a hard nut to crack."

"Not those losers" said Sirius "Dewey Screwem and Howe, they'll be harassing me about the entail."

"You do have a particularly fine tail" said Albus.

"Well I'm going home to feed the hippogriff and turn the defences up. Won't keep the letters out from them, but at least my immediate family are dead." said Sirius. "Should I take that?"

"Well, can you read Gobbledegook?" asked Albus.

"Of course not" said Sirius.

"Well, before you go… I'd like two memories… one from , ahem, that day, and the other of that failed ritual. You're the nearest thing to a practitioner of rituals, and I need to understand the mistake before we risk either ritual anchor –we only have two that aren't Harry… though if you'd find the locket the elf Kreacher is guarding, it's equally essential" said Albus.

Sirius sat down on a nearby chair. "Right, how does this work?" he asked.

Several hours later, there were two vials, each with a silvery wisp, and Sirius was yawning "Bloody hell" he said "That's atrociously hard."

Albus opened the cupboard off to one side of the room, and lifted out a large stone bowl filled with glowing liquid. He carried it over to the desk and set it down carefully. "A pensive" he said "Ever seen one?"

"I thought they were fairy-tales" said Sirius bluntly.

"Rare and valuable" said Albus "If you would come over, when I say so, dip a finger in, and we can relive your memory of the failed ritual."

"Oh okay" said Sirius, standing up "For a second I thought you'd say relive Halloween."

"I feel you would not like that" said Albus.

"I'd rather - " Sirius frowned "My memory of it's a little fuzzier." he remarked.

"Only a little – if you review your memory it will refresh" said Albus.

"I'll skip that" said Sirius, pursing his mouth.

Albus poured a freshly collected memory wisp into the Pensive "If you would come and stick a finger in when I do so" said Albus. "We can review."

Sirius came over, sighed and held out a shaky finger.

"It won't be like being there" said Albus reassuringly "And – finger in!" he said.

Sirius stuck his finger into the swirling liquid , and with a strange swirling sensation ,he found himself standing in a ghostly room with a ghostly James, and Remus and Peter, and more oddly, Himself. All standing still, but gathered around the ritual circle he remembered them drawing so long ago. He walked around himself and eyed his back "Yep I did have a nice arse" he said.

"If you would come here" said Albus. Sirius looked over, and Albus Dumbledore stood, in full colour, watching the frozen scene.

Sirius went over and Albus did something… because the scene animated.

James stirred a potion.

"It's basically just a potion, and some sacrifice" explained Sirius.

Ghostly young Peter was reading the book. "James?" he asked "It says there's a cost to the change you make."

"Well, I'll make it small obviously" said James.

"Tipping Lily Evans from despising you, to wanting to lick your tonsils?" asked young Sirius "Seems a big change to me."

"Come on – Prongs needs that" said Pete "And we're helping him. Marauders forever. All Together!"

"Well not in broom closets, obviously" said young Sirius.

"Course not" said Pete, sighing. "But … I've got your back, James."

i"I'll always be ready to help out – anything" said Remus "baby-sitting might be a bit tricky, what with my furry little problem,"

"You're my brother, James" said young Sirius, "You're my family, and I'll always put you and your family first."

And Peter took a gemstone from the pile of emeralds and pocketed it.

"Peter took an emerald! That Dirty little RAT!" said Sirius.

"Quiet please" said Albus.

James finished the potion, and poured it into a goblet, that he offered to the four cardinal directions, then drank. He grimaced, then poured the rest onto the emeralds, which caught fire and burnt with a bright white light.

When the ritual ended, the gemstones had burnt to ash. Remus was staring fixedly at the ash "Well, it certainly was expensive." he said.

With a lurching disorientation, they were suddenly back in Dubledore's office, with their fingers in the bowl. Sirius pulled his finger out. "That's… pretty much hoe I remember it" he said.

"Oh dear" said Albus. "You made sacrifices."

"Yeah, nearly a thousand galleons worth of emeralds" said Sirius "And Peter stole one."

Albus staggered over and sat down heavilyy in his large, high-backed totally not a throne chair.

"Sirius… Peter swore to always be part of the maruders… forever all together. Remus swore to help out – even baby-sitting, and you swore to always put James and his family first"

"Thats… we just said stuff" said Sirius.

"Sirius… Peter betrayed the Maruaders. Remus made no attempt to contact Harry after Halloween, and you …. placed a higher importance on revenge than looking after Harry. And as a result… spent twelve years in Azkaban" said Albus.

"James didn't … say anything though." said Sirius "Disproved by counter-example."

"And James Potter gave up his trouble-making ways and became… a more confident Remus Lupin?" asked Albus. Sirius frowned "But… that… that'.d mean that… that we screwewd everythign up bey doing the ritua lin th first place."

"Not… everything" said Albus "After all, James Potter did get married to Lily Evans. Harry is alive to this very day."

He rumaged on the desk and found the Obscure and derided potions book and re-read the page.

"Sirius" he said quietly "I… suspect…" he sighed "When I first head the prophecy."

"What?" asked Sirius.

"At the end. There was bit that was not in the offical recorded prophecy." said Albus.

"Wot?"

"Break my loom, feel your doom," said Albus "I… I fear that meddling in the very warp and weft of fates does… attract the attention of ...certain entities." He re-read a section, this time aloud "The warp and weft when shared would shear and shear." He sighed "Oh dear." he added. "You shared the warp and weft. Multiple small sacrifices."

"Getting Betrayed was not a small sacrifice!" said Sirius indignantly.

"Will shear and shear" said Albus "Shear can mean to take on a lean – and in the context of a woven fabric, distorted out of shape. Shear can also mean cut. Which… historically regarding the fates means…"

"Oh fuck" said Sirius "Prongs literally gave his life to shag Lily Evans."

Albus read the ritual more carefully.

"Fools!" he exclaimed "Peter did divination, why did he not see the warning!"

"What warning?" asked Sirius.

"Offspring of the rituals' consequences will be… it does rather explain Harry's habit of getting into such terrible scrapes."

"But he gets out again!" said Sirius proudly "Not a lot of fourteen-year-olds survive old Vodly."

"Sirius… if what I heard … the message came from the fates… they have an especial dislike for young Harry." said Albus. "Binary stochastic luck."

"Prongs said he asked Evans. You know, after he married her – she said it meant like a coin-toss."

"Yes" said Albus coldly "Heads Harry has good luck, tails he has bad luck. He's quite literally on fate's … naughty list."

"He's a good kid" said Sirius. "A little weird, I admit, but a good kid."

"as far as I can tell" said Albus "You and your friends, apart from disregarding all the important safety advice, and making sacrifices that led to the current day as we have it… made no errors in the ritual at all."

"Hmm" said Sirius "That didn't sound like you exactly gave us an Exceeds Expectations."

"No" said Albus "This ritual is incredibly dangerous, and leads to nothing but disaster."

"And the one in the goblin handbook?" asked Sirius.

"Is an egyyptian ritual, and seems quite…. Straightforward and safe in comparison." said Albus. "Have you got any proof it's safe?" asked Sirius. "I don't want to sound like a … stuffy old git but Rituals scare me now."

"Ah" said Albus.

"ah?" asked Sirius. "What do you mean, Ah?"

"The Harry, the alternate universe Harry that sent the scars to himself, that documented this ritual, and where to find the … lets say focii, performed the ritual."

"Clever bugger" said Sirius. "So he… all on his own, defeated Voldemort. I knew from the day he was born that he was special."

Albus sighed "He had two or more associates, and they were quite prepared to … bend rules."

"Well, the odd ritual" said Sirius "obviously excluding ones that modify fate. Those are just… no good."

"And… he has erm." said Albus.

"He has what?"

"His true love was, as far as I can determine, his assistant in the ritual" said Albus.

"I need to meet this girl" said Sirius "Clearly Harry's gonna get over the whole cursed-by-fate thing if his true love is that good."

"I do not feel that meeting you would be in her best interests until perhaps, your public reputation is a little less … tarnished." said Albus. "She is a quiet girl."

"Huh. Quiet. I always thought Harry'd find the next Evans." said Sirius.

"She's a Slytherin" said Albus. "and a pureblood…. Oh, and blonde."

"Oh god" groaned Sirius "I have cousins like that – they're all giant bitches."

"Miss Greengrass, has, until the recent … adventure with the scars, been a quite unremarkable student" said Albus.

"Oh" said Sirius. "Well, I'll um… go find an introductory book on rituals then" he said, and stood he paused before the fireplace "Do you think the hippogriff will ever be safe to come back here?"

"Oh I think with a suitably different name, and perhaps a little grooming it will be fine" said Albus.

"That would be good" said Sirius "He eats a hell of a lot, you know."

"Yes…" said Albus, imagining vast piles of guano.

"If you um… translated the one you want to do" said Sirius "I could… look it over."

"I will try to fit that into my schedule" agreed Albus.

Sirius cast floo-powder into the fire and left in a flare of free flames for "Twelve Grimmauld Place!"