JENNIE

I review next week's docket and groan. Tzuyu Chou is listed as the defense attorney for a case that's going to trial. Jury selection starts Monday. Of all the fucking luck. Tzuyu has popped up into head far too many times since the incident, and Lisa has never left. I miss sex with Lisa. The texts have slowed between us. I don't know what's going on with the investigation. It feels like I'm no longer in control of my life. My phone beeps, and my pulse races when I see Lisa's name on the screen.

L: How are you?

J: Speak of the devil. I crave her.

L: You're talking about me? She asks.

J: You just popped up in my thoughts.

L: Hopefully all good.

I send a smile emoji.

L: Can you talk?

J: Yes.

My phone immediately rings. I wait until the third one before I answer. "Hi."

"How are you?"

I've missed her voice. "I'm hanging in there. I was just thinking about the investigation and wondering if it's ever going to end."

"You know these things take forever. And if the mayor is involved and he's not the target, whatever's going on must be huge,"

She says.

"Wonderful way to start my career." I realize how selfish I sound. Lisa is in this, too. "How are you? How's your job?"

"We've been pretty busy. You'd be surprised at how many house fires happen because people don't think to clean out their chimneys. I'm actually on my way home from a call."

"Were you texting and driving?"

"No, I was talk-to-texting and driving."

"Have you had dinner?" I don't know why I ask. It's not as if I have any food my place.

"Are you inviting me over? Because I smell like smoke, and I'm a mess right now," she says.

"I don't mind. I can order us food."

She sounds hesitant. "Is that a good idea? I mean, I don't want to overstep any boundaries you've set."

She has every right to question me. And enough time has passed that if anyone questioned us, we have public history where friendship is believable. "As friends only. I could use one right about now."

"If you don't mind me smelling like smoke, I'll pick up dinner and be there in forty-five minutes."

I jump up, excited that I'm having company and even more excited that it's Lisa. I make my bed and put on leggings and a sweater. I don't look like my normal fuckable self, but the last time she saw me was the night I was assaulted. I look better. I call down to the doorman and tell him I have a guest. I open a bottle of wine and pour myself a glass and wait. She knocks, and I jump up to open the door.

"I got salads." She holds up a giant brown bag. "I figure with the holidays coming up, it might be wise to go with something healthy."

I'd forgotten how sexy she is. She's not wearing her uniform, but she's in khakis, a blue sweater with identification pinned to her breast, and black boots that give her added height. "Salads are great. Thank you for thinking about me. Come on in." I step aside, and she walks into the kitchen. She smells like a campfire and her cologne.

I try not to squirm with need. She stands close to look at my cheek.

"No more bruise. That's great."

It's hard to look her in the eye. I'm fighting my sexual attraction, and she's walking around my kitchen grabbing plates and silverware as though she's oblivious to me, to our history. "It was sore for only a week. Work was embarrassing. Nobody wants to see a woman with a shiner. That's definitely not the kind of attention I want."

"I'm sorry it was so hard for you. And, again, I'm sorry I didn't get there sooner," she says.

I want to touch her forearm, but I don't want to give her false hope. I don't want to give it to myself either. "I'm okay, Lisa. I promise." I feel so naked and vulnerable when she looks at me. It takes all my energy to stay on this side of the kitchen island. "Tell me about you. What have you been doing?"

"Work is busy. It's hard to have a life this time of year. At least the holidays are coming up. I'm excited for an extended weekend, although I'm sure I'll get calls. Thanksgiving is the time when men think they know how to deep-fry turkeys and end up burning down their fences and decks. What are you doing?" Lisa sits at the table after I do and pours herself a glass of wine. She leans back in the chair and waits, for me to engage with her, I suppose.

"I only get Thursday off. I have jury selection tomorrow because a case is going to trial. Hopefully, I can mediate a settlement, but everyone seems to want to go to trial."

Lisa wipes her mouth after taking a bite. "Yes. Tzuyu said she's going to be busy this week with a trial. She's lead counselor."

I almost roll my eyes but catch myself. She'll be in my courtroom. Not that it's a secret, but I don't want to talk about it.

I wonder if Lisa knows it's mine. I hate myself for asking, but I can't help it. "How is she?"

Lisa blushes. A slight panic rises and sticks in my throat. I take a sip of water to suppress it as I wait for her answer.

"She's good. She's, uh, coming to Thanksgiving dinner with me. She didn't have anywhere to go. My parents make a big deal about it, and we invite a lot of people."

"Oh." I stare at Lisa and realize she's serious and not just trying to make me jealous. "Oh, okay. I thought she came from a big family, since she's Judge Williamson's niece." There seemed to be plenty of family at his retirement party. She shoots me a strange look, as if she'd never thought of that. I nod at her. "That's nice of you and your family."

"What are you going to do for Thanksgiving?"

I don't want to lie, but I don't want her to pity me or, worse, invite me over. "I'm keeping it low-key this time."

She stares at me. "Thank you for not being upset."

I can feel the tiny vertical line on my forehead deepen as I try to stop myself from showing a negative reaction. "Does this mean you and Tzuyu are dating?" I genuinely don't know how I feel about Lisa and Tzuyu possibly dating because it's never been confirmed until this moment.

"We seem to be in a place where we understand one another. Not dating, but we are getting to know one another."

She's suddenly very interested in her salad, and I put my hand on my stomach to keep it from falling. I know what she just said is not supposed to be hurtful, but it stings. "That's good then." I don't want to know anything more about their relationship. "My parents are coming into town at Christmas, so that'll be nice. Normally, I go there, but because of the new job and everything going on, I'm staying here."

"That'll be good. I mean, I go through withdrawal if I don't see my family at least every month. I have two nephews. Having an in with the fire department is super cool, and I have an image to uphold."

She pulls up a photo on her phone, the first personal thing she's shared with me. I look at the photo and instantly smile. It's Lisa with two small children acting goofy. "They're adorable. Thanks for sharing. Do you take them on field trips to the fire station?"

She smiles and nods. "They love it. They get to climb on the trucks, slide down the pole, and hang out with the crew."

"What made you switch and become an investigator?"

"I like the science of it all—to fighting fires and behind why they start in the first place. It's fascinating."

I can tell she loves her job. And I know she's good at it. Her poise and knowledge on the stand was a massive turn-on. I'm going to have to change my way of thinking. "Not too many people love what they do as much as you do."

"I know you do. And as awesome as it is that you're a judge, I would have liked to see you in action in the courtroom."

I lean back in my chair and think about life before the trial that changed everything for me. "I enjoyed digging and getting to the bottom of things. I think I'm going to like being a judge more than a practicing lawyer. Not to mention all the work will be done ahead of time, so I only have to deal with what's important." I wonder what Tzuyu's like in the courtroom. I'll find out soon enough. I refuse to allow my brain to entertain what she's like in bed. "I didn't enjoy trying cases. I enjoyed doing the research, like you, and finding out what happened. As a judge I'm literally handed only pertinent information, and most trials are done within a reasonable time frame. It's the best of both worlds." I'm not sure I love it as much as I imply. I need to find my comfort zone in my new job.

"I get it. I like the research aspect. I'm always afraid somebody might refute what I say, but so far, nobody's questioned my knowledge or skill," she says.

Normally, I would add a quick sex quip about her skill, but it might be too soon. "Your confidence is noted. You command attention in court." I'm not trying to inflate her ego, but we both know it's true. At least we still have the honesty between us.

"Thank you."

I can tell she wants to say more, but she sips her wine instead.

She misses me. I can tell by her body language. The energy bouncing off her is intense. "Tell me something good about your week." Please don't say anything about Tzuyu.

She shrugs. "I've been hanging around the fire station more, just because I miss the camaraderie. I love my job, but my boss is kind of a pain in the ass."

"Why?"

"Honny's a nice guy, but he's very controlling, and only his way is right. It's nice to hang out with the guys because they aren't perfect, and they still know how to have fun," she says.

"He's the guy who testified with you, correct?"

"Good memory. I don't think I've said his name before."

"I mean it could have been anyone. I just figure, your district and that being an important case. It just made sense. Speaking of which, have you talked to anyone about the ongoing investigation?" I ask.

"No, but I really want them to hurry the fuck up. I'm tired of looking over my shoulder. And also worrying about you."

I brush her statement off with a shrug. Oh, God. I've hit awkward small talk, and I'm drowning. I need to put space between us. "Would you like to sit in the living room?"

She thinks about it a little too hard, and I almost backpedal and retract the invitation. "Yes. That sounds nice." We move to the couch. Her impeccable wardrobe covers her from head to toe, but I see a flash of skin as she repositions herself on the couch. Same place, just a different posture.

"What do friends do at a time like this? Should we watch television or rent a movie?" I ask.

"What do you and Nayeon do when you're together?" Lisa runs her hand over her head several times, as if it's a relaxing thing for her. There's so much about her I don't know.

"We talk about everything. We have no secrets."

"She knows about our past?"

I nod slowly. "She does."

Lisa exhales slowly. "Okay. Tell me something about Nayeon. I like her. She's fiercely protective of you."

"She's wonderful. We've been best friends for about twelve years now. I met her in law school." I pull a small blanket up and over my lap. My loft is warm, but I need another barrier between me and Lisa.

"And you decided on different types of law. I mean, she's corporate law, right? And you're a pharmaceutical lawyer? Is that a thing?" she asks.

"It is, but I'm a product-liability lawyer. So, it's not just drugs. It's a bigger umbrella."

"Did you want to do that? When I hear that somebody's a lawyer, I automatically assume they're a criminal lawyer or defense attorney."

"Those are super-exciting avenues, but you can make a lot of money specializing in different things."

Lisa chuckled. "I can see that by your new place. This is beautiful."

I'm quiet for a moment. "I didn't know how to tell you I'd moved. You were also the only person who'd been to that apartment. You, Nayeon, and my parents."

"I liked your apartment. It was in a nice place and had charm. Or maybe you were the one who gave it charm," Lisa says. She twists so that her back is against the arm of the sofa and her knee now on the cushion.

"I needed a forever place, and while The Plaza is nice, the crime rate is climbing. So far, the garment district has been nice and peaceful."

"This is a far better place, for sure. I love the windows and your bedroom up in the loft."

"Tell me about your house." I can't believe I'm making small talk and genuinely want to know her answers.

"I live in a mid-century-modern house. The backyard is very private, which is important to me. Some of my neighbors are older, and some are young families. We're a hodgepodge group."

Lisa looks the type. Like she'd wrestle in the front yard with her neighbor's kids or help anyone with their groceries if she happened to be walking by.

"Why are you smiling at me?"

Busted. I shrug because my thoughts have turned cheesy. "You just seem like the perfect neighbor. Very helpful. Plus, you have EMT training and can help put out fires. I'm kind of a worthless neighbor. I won't watch your kids or your pets. No, you can't borrow a cup of sugar because I don't have any staples in my loft. And do I want to hear carolers outside my loft? No. Definitely not."

Lisa looks stunned. "What? Who hates Christmas? I mean besides Ebenezer Scrooge, and even he eventually came around."

How do I explain to somebody who's had a life outside of work that the holidays have never been important in my world? "I don't hate Christmas. I enjoy the season. I just don't have a lot of family or friends. Remember, I only work."

"Okay, then. Let's talk about work. You sentenced that man to fifteen years, right?"

I snort. "An appeal was filed even before sentencing. Did I tell you about Sterling?"

"What about him? About that fight?"

I couldn't remember what Lisa knew and what she didn't.

"Sterling called and wanted to do lunch."

She interrupts me and rolls her eyes. "Of course, he did."

I shake my head. "Not like that. I made it perfectly clear I wasn't interested. He asked me to consider a lighter sentence for Seamus Williams." Her mouth drops open. I nod. "Yeah. He said he was a family friend and asked me to take it easy as a favor to him."

"That's bullshit. Seamus is trash. No way he's a family friend of the mayor."

"Oh, wait. This story gets better. That conversation happened before the retirement party. After I was assaulted, Sterling visited me at the courthouse. He pretended he didn't know Bruno Raymond, but I told him that I saw him and the guy arguing. I also let him know I told the police that as well. He left visibly upset. That case is covering up something big."

Lisa sits forward. "Obviously, the mayor is in on whatever this is. Nayeon's right. This reeks of dirty politics. But what was in the warehouse? It definitely started in the bank's storage unit."

"I could review the case files. I mean, the case was about the fire, not about the motive. Seamus kept his mouth shut. I thought for sure something would come out in the trial, but it never did." It's been a while since I got down and dirty with a case, and this one still has meat on the bones. "But if we do this, nobody can know. We don't know who to trust. That means you can't tell Tzuyu. I can't have anybody in the courthouse knowing."

She walks over to the window and stares out at the river. "I won't tell anybody. This could be the friend thing we do together, right?" Her hands are in her pocket, pulling her pants tight across her ass. She looks delicious, but I can't think about that right now.

"I mean, we do need something to do, and this will be a way to exercise a different part of our bodies. Our brains."

"It seems rather silly. I'm positive the detectives on the case are a million steps ahead of this and have thought it through. But why not? You're right. It gives us a project together, and we get to unite our careers. And, hey, we might help take down the mob," Lisa says."You know the mob isn't involved."

"I know, but I like Nayeon's flair for the dramatic."

"The whole thing shouldn't take that long. I know this week is kind of out, but what about after Thanksgiving?" I sound desperate, and I'm not. I just happen to have extra time around the holidays.

Lisa walks over to me, but she's careful to keep her distance.

"What's wrong with tomorrow? Can you get the case files then? We can do a repeat of tonight. I don't have to be anywhere or do anything until Thursday. Unless I get called out, which can happen."

She checks her phone, shoots off a text, and picks up her coat. "I'll swing by same time tomorrow, but tomorrow you buy dinner. Unless you want to cook."

"You just tell me Italian or Thai," I say. She smiles at me before swinging on her coat. "Have a good night. I'll see you tomorrow."

I lock the door and brush off the emptiness I find inside. I'm not even horny. I have a drawer full of vibrators upstairs and a sex machine that requires me to do nothing. That's not it at all. I just miss having her desire me.