Trigger Warning*

Child abuse

Reference of SA and rape.

*Flashback*

Fangtasia wouldn't officially open for another two hours. It was a cold February night and Sookie had been there late trying to get the books caught up since she and Eric had gotten back from vacation. Eric had taken her to Sweden. They were normally closed on Monday and that gave Sookie plenty of time to get everything caught up from the weekend. But one of their flights had been delayed due to an earthquake. So they hadn't gotten back to Shreveport until late Monday night. Eric told her to wait until Wednesday to worry about going in to do payroll. He had felt how tired she was from the flight. Eric, Sookie, and Pam had set up a wonderful system. Sookie took care of everything behind the scenes, with the help of Eric. She scanned all the employees. She and Pam did the hiring together. Sookie was incharge of payroll, she had to be there on the mornings the truck came, and if Eric needed any kind of business done during the day, Sookie handled it. She hated getting behind, because it could throw off her whole week. Pam was in charge of running the club. Eric didn't want Sookie anywhere near that many vampires. Eric used the club to do his Sheriff's duties.

That particular day Sookie had overslept. She hadn't even gotten to the bar until close to 4:00 pm. She got there right before the delivery truck. It was more important to get payroll done so she was still putting everything away when Eric got there at 6:00. He had snuck up behind her and grabbed her around the waist as she placed a top shelf bottle of whiskey in its place. Sookie screamed and started to kick until he spun her around and held her against the bar with his body.

"Eric, you scared the shit out of me!" Sookie cried, hitting his chest.

"You shouldn't be here Lover, I've got a group of vampires coming in that have been starting trouble. I also have someone new that is supposed to check in tonight. The last thing I want them to see is you,"

"I overslept. I had to do payroll first, so checks would be in on time. And I'm still trying to figure out this order. I didn't place it. Whoever did it's huge. I'm not sure where to put everything." Eric bent down and kissed her. His hand running up her short skirt of her dress.

" It must have been Pam, just leave it." He said, kissing her neck and thrusting his hips against her.

"You're so bad! You know Pam will be here any minute." she laughed, wrapping her arms around him.

"It's not Pam I'm worried about." Eric said, running his hands up and down her waist.

"You can smell the fairy all the way in the parking lot." a voice came from the doorway. Eric stiffened against her and looked up.

"Thalia, how nice to see you. Why are you here?" Eric asked, letting Sookie go and turning around.

"New York was afraid I was going to take her crown. She arranged a reassignment with Sophie- Anne. I checked in last night and she sent me here." Eric looked down at Sookie.

"Sookie, this is Thalia,Thalia, this is Sookie, She is mine." Eric said.

"Does the queen know you have a fairy?" Thalia asked.

"No." Eric said honestly.

"You could really smell her in the parking lot?" Eric asked very seriously.

"She's only part fae, am I right? Mostly human? If she had more in her, I'd have smelled her down the street."

Eric bent down and kissed Sookie on the top of her head.

"Go home, take my car, I'll bring yours later." Sookie didn't wait for him to say anything else. She scooted from between him and the bar, grabbed his keys from the bar, and walked away from them as quickly as she could. She waited until she was in the car before she began to cry.

End flashback*

Three year old Sookie, managed to get a scream out before her mama poured the bucket of ice cold water over her head again.

"You stay out of my head you stupid little bitch!" her mama screamed. Sookie choked on the water as it filled her mouth and went up her nose.

Sookie shivered from the cold. Her mama grabbed her by her dress and shook her. "You learn to control it! Do you hear me? Control it! I'll sell you to the monsters if you don't!" Sookie was gasping for breath. She was to afraid to say anything.

"Now get your ass in that bedroom and change your clothes. You peed on yourself again, you disgusting little whore. And don't you dare say a word of this to your father or Gran. Your uncle is asleep, you best not wake him up." She threw Sookie down on the ground. And Sookie crawled away as fast as humanly possible. Her room was pitch black. The monster was waiting for her there. She began to cry, waiting for him to jump out and grab her and do all the horrible things he had told her he would do in his mind. He'd never said any of it outloud. Sookie slipped in and crawled into her closet as quietly as possible. She wasn't able to change her clothes, the fear of waking up the monster kept her from trying. Mama knew that. She wasn't sure why she had asked her. She sat down on her closet floor in the dark. It was cold. She just had to hold on long enough and stay out of the way and Daddy or Gran would be there soon.

She heard movement in the room. The closet door creaked when it was opened. Sookie tried to go further in the closet.

"Come on out Sookie, I know you're in there." The voice that said it wasn't her uncle, but this voice was just as terrifying. Sookie looked down. She wasn't a little girl anymore. She was grown up but she was still just as terrified as she had been when she was three. The cold hands reached out for her and grabbed her roughly by the hair.

Sookie screamed. Bill Compton's fangs ran out. He threw her on the bed and jumped on top of her. He covered her mouth to keep her from screaming. He bit savagely into her throat. Sookie stopped struggling. The room was starting to get blurry. Her eyes closed and she welcomed death.

Sookie woke up screaming, soaked in sweat. It had been two days since she had been back. Physically, she was fine. On the inside she was a complete nervous wreck. She hadn't been able to sleep well. She was haunted by nightmares of Bill Compton, fairies, her mother, and her uncle. She saw them every time she closed her eyes. She jumped at every loud noise. She laid there sobbing quietly. She didn't want to wake Eric up. But then she remembered Eric had left after she went to sleep the night before. She was completely alone for the first time. She couldn't remember when, but the witches were causing all kinds of trouble. Two of the area vampires were missing. Godric had called Eric just as they were laying down the morning before. Sookie had been sitting up nights with Eric so she could sleep during the day when he did. The nightmares weren't as bad when he was with her. Godric had told him how sorry he was to take him away from her but he felt that they couldn't wait to see what would happen. Eric had held her while she fell asleep.

Sookie hurriedly reached beside her on the night table to switch on the lamp. But she knocked it off and screamed when it shattered. A large piece of the glass cut her hand. Sookie sat there just sobbing, trying to breathe through the fear. She absolutely hated the thought of Bill Compton being able to feel her because he had forced his blood in her. It was as if he really had raped her. She brought her knees to her chest and held them, shaking uncontrollably and hyperventilating. She knew something was wrong. She'd just had a bad feeling since hearing about the witches. She was afraid to move from the spot she was in. The room was light tight and had no windows. Without the lights on it was pitch black in there. Sookie screamed again when the door opened and light flooded the room. She screamed and screamed, praying to pass out before whoever was there could hurt her any worse.

"Sookie, it's me." Eric said calmly, sitting beside her and gathering her in his arms. "Shh slow deep breaths. You're safe." He brushed her hair from her face and placed kisses on her forehead trying to calm her breathing. She was still hyperventilating. Eric leaned over and turned on the other lamp for her. He looked at her hand that she had cut on the lamp. "It's not that bad. Let me heal it for you." Eric bit the tip of his finger and smeared the drop of blood on her cut before leaning back against the headboard. She curled up against him. It took her another few minutes to calm down.

"I thought you had left this morning and were spending the day at Godric's?" She cried softly, not looking up.

"Godric called back after you fell asleep. He said we could go first dark. He got here just a few minutes ago. He didn't like the idea of you being here all day by yourself. He knew I didn't want to leave you. Pam's going to stay with you. Tell me what happened, Lover." Eric said, caressing the side of her face with his thumb.

" It was just a bad dream. I can't even remember it." Sookie lied, she remembered every second of it. If she closed her eyes anytime soon she would still be able to feel Bill Compton on top of her. "Are they ever going to stop?" She asked him. Eric kissed the top of her head and wrapped both arms around her shoulders. These nightmares she was having were the one thing he was powerless to stop. He had lost count on how many times she'd woken him up, terrified. Each time he'd held her until she calmed down.

"I hope so." He told her truthfully. "Pam will be here shortly. She's going to stay while we're gone. I hope this won't take to long." Sookie looked at him. "What time is it?" Sookie asked, resting her head against his chest.

"Just after 6. You slept again all day. Do you want to shower while I'm gone? Then I can take you to dinner when I get back? You haven't left the safe room since we got here." Sookie pulled out of his arms and stood up.

"Baby I don't know if I can." It was so overwhelming out there. She felt safer here where nothing could get to her. Eric understood but he also knew how important it was for her to start living her life again.

"You were supposed to turn me before? Can you still?" Eric kissed the top of her head and held her tightly.

"Soon. But I can't right now. There's an open missing persons case open against you right now. The media is going to go crazy once they find out you're back. I had to go over Nan Flanagan's head just to keep them from finding out you were back already. If you were to return as a vampire it would cause unnecessary damage to the AVL's image." Eric went stiff as he repeated what he had been told word for word. Sookie felt his carefully contained rage.

"How long do we have to wait?" Eric stood up. He turned away from her and walked over to the dresser. He rested his head in his hands.

"Eric what? How long do we have to wait?" He turned to her. "At least two years. Or until Bill Compton is caught."

Sookie fell back down on the bed. She brought her knees up to her chest and fell over on her pillow. She couldn't live like this for another two years.

Eric sat beside her and placed a hand on her hip.

"I'm trying to find a work around. I just need some more time." Sookie began to sob.

"Ok. I believe you. I don't feel like going out tonight. I don't want to get dressed. I don't even want to shower. I wish they had just killed me." Eric squeezed her hip.

"You don't mean that. You're going to get through this." He felt her desperation. She was scared. What he wasn't expecting was for her to jump up. "No Eric! I can't. I can't take these nightmares! They're so real. My mom and my uncle and Bill Compton. They're all there waiting for me in my dreams! I'm scared all of the damn time. He knows I'm back Eric! He does. We both know it!" Sookie screamed, fresh tears running down her cheeks. Eric stood up and pulled her back tightly in his arms.

"Lover, you're safe here. I honestly don't know if he can feel you or not." Eric said, trying to calm her down. "Why didn't you tell me about the nightmares?" He asked calmly. "What good would it have done? You can't make them stop?" She cried into his chest.

"Sookie, you don't have to get over this alone. I'm more than willing to help you anyway I can." He ran his hand up her back.

"I know, but even you can't make these damn nightmares stop." She said, reaching for his hand and clutching it to her chest. He had to leave soon, and the thought of leaving her this scared was tearing him apart. There was a soft knock on the door and Pam came in.

"Eric, Godric's ready." Eric nodded at Pam.

"I'll be back as soon as I can. I love you." Eric kissed the side of her head. Just as he let her go Sookie grabbed his hand quicker than either of them thought possible and threw her arms around his neck.

"I'm sorry. I don't mean to sound ungrateful and whiny and I really don't want to die. I know you would do anything for me. I just don't want to be hurt anymore." Eric pulled Sookie tightly against him. He held her for a few moments then turned to leave. It felt like she had been kicked in the stomach when Eric closed the door behind him.

"Sookie?" Pam said. "It's not always going to be this hard. Let me help you. You stink. Let's get you up and showered. I'll do your hair and make up. We'll find you something to wear and I'll text Eric and tell him to pick you up something to eat on his way home. Maybe you can have dinner with him in the kitchen when he gets home. You just need to take baby steps." Sookie looked at her friend. "Pam, I was awful to him. He told me he can't turn me now. I don't know. It's all I wanted was just not to be so weak." Sookie sat back down and Pam sat beside her on the bed. "Sookie, this hasn't been easy on either of you. I do know that particular order came directly from the authority via Nan Flanagan. Eric notified her when you returned. He had to. He informed her of the decision to turn you if it was still something you wanted and she told him "No." We're trying to figure out why." Sookie sighed.

"I have nightmares about him, Pam. He's waiting for me everytime I close my fucking eyes. It's been over a year. He got his blood in me once. Can he find me?" Pam shrugged her shoulders.

"Honestly, I don't know. You have a strong bond with Eric. Normally after that long had passed I'd say no. But it wasn't really that long for you. I just don't know Sookie. But I do think you need to get out of this bedroom." Sookie looked at Pam.

"You'll help me get ready?" Pam smiled.

"Of course. Let's start with a shower. I'll text Eric."

For the next hour Sookie shaved and showered. Pam helped her get dressed and fixed her hair and makeup. Pam picked her out a long blue dress with short sleeves. It was fitted in the chest and made her boobs look bigger. Pam gave her a white sweater to wear over it. She curled her hair away from her face. Sookie looked in the mirror. She looked like a different person. She looked at the clock on the bedside table.

"Shouldn't we have heard something from them by now?" Pam shook her head.

"You would know if something was wrong." Sookie nodded.

"Come on lets go in the main house to wait for them." Pam said, grabbing Sookie's arm lightly. She pulled her out of the room and they made their way to the other side of the house.

Sookie took in the design. Eric really had outdone himself on this one. He had paid attention to every detail. Pam led her out to the closed-in back porch. Sookie looked around her, trying to pay attention to her surroundings. The flood lights came on in the back. It was the first time Sookie had seen the pool. It was huge with a lazy river, rock wall with a bridge that led to the other side. There was a huge water slide on the other side and a hot tub big enough for them to swim in. The pool lights were on and it made the water look even prettier. She desperately wanted to get in that hot tub with Eric later. Sookie sat down in one of the patio chairs and Pam fixed her a drink. Sookie smelled the drink. The alcohol smelled strong.

"I don't know if I should." Sookie said, pushing the drink to the side.

"Sure you can, you're a grown woman Sookie, you just need to take the edge off a little." Sookie took a sip of the drink. The alcohol burned her throat going down. She took another sip and quickly downed the entire drink.

"What if the fairies come for me?" Sookie asked when she was done. Pam laughed

"That's why I'm here. They really done a number on you didn't they?" Sookie shook her head.

"They wanted to breed me, Pam, and keep me locked away in Fairy." Pam never got to answer her. They both felt the bond with Eric suddenly disappear. Sookie jumped up out of her chair.

"Pam what was that? What happened to Eric?" She screamed. "I don't know Sookie, please calm down." Pam was already back in the house, calling Eric. He never answered so she tried Godric. Again no answer.

"Pam what happened? I can't feel him at all." Sookie barely got the words out when Godric and Eric came flying through the door. Godric was carrying Eric over his shoulder. They were both covered in blood. Eric was limp and not moving. Godric sat him down on the rug.

Sookie ran to him and fell on her knees beside him.

"Sookie, give him a little space. I think he's ok physically. But that damn witch used a spell on him." Sookie cradled Eric's head in her lap. His face was warm to the touch. He was almost hot. His eyes shot open. He sat up gasping for air. Like he needed it but couldn't get enough in. Sookie helped him hold his head up.

After a few minutes he fell limp in her arms.

"Baby!" Sookie screamed. "Baby please! I'm so sorry. Baby!"

"Sookie, he's going to be fine. One of the witches shot him in the chest. He was already healed. But you know Eric. He has to have the last word. He grabbed her and he was going to glamor her. She cast a spell on him. His body is still adjusting. He'll be out for a while, probably. But he'll be fine. I'll carry him upstairs for you. Oh and Sookie, he's human."