Kelly put Gabby's suitcase in the trunk of his Mustang before closing it and leaning against it. Gabby was taking a nap in the guest room while he retrieved her suitcase and checked her out of the hotel. Her exhaustion had been evident, but she'd still protested until he'd finally picked her up off of the bathroom floor and carried her to the bed, tucking her in. He'd sat with her for a few minutes while she fell asleep. Once he was sure she was asleep, he leaned over and kissed her forehead before standing up and walking out of the room, closing the door behind him.
He was thankful to have a little bit of time to process everything that had happened this morning. The exhaustion he'd felt when he'd gotten off shift was gone, replaced by a million thoughts running through his head. He pushed himself off the trunk and walked to the driver's side. He knew exactly what he needed to do right now.
"Kelly! Come on in," Donna told the squad lieutenant when she opened the door to her and Chief Boden's house. She was surprised to see him, but knew he never showed up unannounced without good reason. "Wallace is out back; he's getting ready to put some burgers on the grill for lunch. You're welcome to stay and join us," she informed him.
Kelly was about to reply when he felt little arms wrap around his legs from behind. "Uncle Kelly!"
Kelly grinned and turned around, swooping Terrance up into a hug. "Hey, Terrance! You're getting so big, buddy!" He glanced at Donna, "Thanks for the invite, but I can't stay long."
Terrance grinned. "Yeah! I'm in preschool now!"
"Wow!" Kelly exclaimed. "You're almost grown up!" He tickled Terrance's sides, causing the little boy to break into a fit of giggles.
Donna smiled as she turned to head to the backyard to let Boden know that Kelly was here. Terrance loved anytime he got to see the men and women that worked at his father's firehouse, but he and Kelly had a special bond. Terrance adored the squad lieutenant, and Donna had a strong suspicion that the feeling was mutual. Kelly was great with the boy, and no matter what his reason for stopping by, always made sure to spend at least a little time with him.
"Wallace?" Donna called as she stepped into the backyard. "Kelly's here. He's talking to Terrance right now."
Boden glanced up from the grill where he was standing, arranging the charcoal and getting ready to light it. "Thanks, Donna. You can send him back. Okay if he stays for lunch?"
"I already invited him, but he said he can't stay long," Donna informed her husband. "He seems worried, Wallace. He didn't say what it was about, but it seems important."
Wallace nodded and followed his wife back inside. "Terrance, why don't you go help your mom in the kitchen? Dad and Uncle Kelly are going to talk for a bit," he informed his son, who has still in Kelly's arms, chattering away.
"Okay," Terrance replied, his disappointment evident. "Bye, Uncle Kelly," he told Kelly dejectedly as Kelly set him down.
Kelly reached out and ruffled the boy's hair. "I'll come visit again soon, buddy," he promised him before following Boden back to the patio.
"What's going on, Kelly?" Boden asked, offering the younger man a beer.
Kelly almost took it, but changed his mind at the last minute, shaking his head and drawing his hand back. "I better not," he told the Chief, remembering what Gabby had told him about how sensitive she was to smells. The last thing she needed was for the smell of beer on him to make her nauseous.
Boden looked at his squad lieutenant in surprise. Since Kelly had returned from New York, it was rare to see him without a beer in his hand when he was off shift. He sat in one of the chairs on the patio, motioning for Kelly to take the one across from him. "What's going on, Kelly?"
Kelly sat down with a sigh. He hadn't asked Gabby if it was okay to let Boden know, but he needed the older man's advice. Boden was like a father to him, and he didn't know who else to go to. Now he just had to figure out where to start. "I'm going to be a dad," he blurted out finally.
Boden looked at him in shock. It had been a little over two months since Stella had broken up with Kelly, but as far as he knew, his squad lieutenant hadn't had eyes for anyone else since he'd returned. From what Herrmann had told him, whenever they weren't on shift, Kelly was pretty much a permanent fixture at Molly's from open until close, and he always left alone.
Kelly ran his hand through his hair before starting again. "It's not Stella," he informed his chief, figuring that would be a good clarification to make.
Boden nodded, but remained silent, waiting for the younger man to gather his thoughts and continue.
"When I was in New York…I haven't told anyone the whole story of what happened," Kelly began. "I didn't come home right away. Rather than changing my flight, I stayed in New York for a few days. I think I did it partially because I'd hoped Stella would realize she'd made a mistake and change her mind, but that's not what happened. Instead, I ran into an old friend. Or rather, I guess she ran into me? I don't know if that's the right way to explain what happened," Kelly laughed wryly. "She found me at the hotel bar, already pretty drunk. She was in town for a fundraiser and happened to be at the same hotel.
"I poured out the whole story to her. She'd known that Stella and I were engaged, we'd called her, but she didn't know about Girls on Fire or anything else that had happened since then. By the time I was finished, we were both drunk, but I was…" Kelly ran his hand over his face, thinking back to that night. "Let's just say I was far from sober.
"She helped me back to my room, and, uh-" Kelly figured Boden didn't need nor want to hear the full story. "Well, one thing led to another and we slept together," he admitted.
Boden nodded, and Kelly continued, "The next morning," he smiled a little at the memory, "we were both incredibly hung over. She was getting sick in the bathroom, and so I sat with her. We both agreed that it was a one time thing, that it was just sex, and it didn't mean anything. We ate lunch and then she invited me to her fundraiser that night when she found out my only plans were to get drunk. She said you'd never forgive her if she let me come back to Chicago with my liver destroyed," he chuckled.
Boden didn't miss the smile that had crossed Kelly's face when he'd started talking about the morning after, and, after Kelly's remark about him not forgiving her if Kelly came back to Chicago with his liver destroyed, he had a strong suspicion that Kelly was referring to a certain former paramedic, but he kept his mouth shut and let his lieutenant finish his story.
"I went with her, and, even though she was busy most of the night working her magic on people's checkbooks, I still enjoyed it. We danced and talked, although at one point I put my foot in my mouth by telling her about Ca-, about something she wasn't aware of," Kelly quickly caught himself, unaware that Boden had already figured out exactly who the friend was. "We were heading back to our rooms, and when she stepped out of the elevator, I felt this overwhelming panic take hold of me. I think I was scared of being alone. I tried to fight it, but just as the doors closed, I hit the button to open them and went after her.
"I kissed her," Kelly admitted, sheepishly. "Despite what we'd said that morning about it being a one time thing, we slept together again. I didn't mean for it to happen; she just looked so beautiful in her dress and I'd enjoyed our time together so much that I wanted to be with her again. I hadn't even had one full drink that night; I was completely sober. I just…there was this feeling that I'd never felt before; I don't know if it was because of the heartbreak or what, but I just didn't want her to leave that night; I didn't want to be anywhere but with her."
He sighed, "Then, the next morning, we shared a cab to the airport. I hated saying goodbye to her, but we parted ways. I came back to Chicago and she flew back to…she flew back to her home. I chalked it up to the fact that I was heartbroken and she was there and haven't thought of it much since returning." He paused, then corrected himself. "Well, have tried not to think about it much. It didn't mean anything. It's just that I'd tried so hard to find Stella while I was waiting for her to tell me where she was, but with G-, with her, we both just happened to be at the same hotel in New York at the same time. Neither of us lived there; neither of us knew the other would be there. But there we were. And it felt so good to be with someone I knew, someone who cared about me and was my friend."
Kelly pinched the bridge of his nose. "I didn't hear from her again until this morning. When I got off shift, all I wanted to do was go home and sleep, but when I got home, she was waiting outside my door." Kelly chuckled. "I thought she was sick, at first. She'd barely been inside for a minute before running for the bathroom. She's lost so much weight since I saw her last, and she looked so pale; my mind immediately went to Anna."
Boden's could imagine the panic Kelly had felt. Anna's illness and death had been rough on his lieutenant, and for a while, none of them were sure whether Kelley would be able to bounce back from her death. But Stella had managed to break through to him when none of them could, and he had slowly become the Kelly Severide they'd all known and loved, but the new and improved version.
"But when I asked her and she said no, I knew. She's pregnant. And I knew the fact that she'd been waiting on my doorstep could only mean that it was mine," Kelly finished.
"And how do you feel about that?" Boden prodded, unable to tell whether the younger man was happy, sad, angry, scared, or all of the above.
Kelly sighed. "Excited. Scared. Terrified," Kelly replied. "It's just not that simple. She has…we don't know if it's safe for her to continue with the pregnancy." He paused, unsure of how to continue without revealing her identity, unsure of how much Boden knew about Gabby's situation and whether or not Casey had said anything to him. "She has an appointment with an OB that specializes in high risk pregnancies this Wednesday, and we'll find out more then. But it could-" Kelly's voice broke, and he cleared his throat, trying to hide it, before continuing, "it could kill her. And we could lose the baby." He looked up at Boden, his eyes bright with unshed tears, "I'm terrified, Chief. I want this baby, but not at the risk of her life. I know she wants the baby, too, and I've already promised that I'll respect whatever she decides, but I'm scared."
Boden tried to hide his own worry and concern. Despite the fact that they hadn't stayed in contact all that much since she left for Puerto Rico, he still thought of Gabby as a daughter and had a soft spot for her. He also knew how much she wanted to be a mother; Casey had talked to him about it once Gabby had left, explaining the situation to him, and admitting that he was at fault every bit as much, if not more, than Gabby, in their marriage falling apart because of how he'd reacted.
"I don't have any magic words to say to make this all go away, Kelly," Boden told the younger man. "I wish I did. But I can tell you that being a father is the best thing in the world. And based off of your interactions with Terrance and the Herrmann kids and Cruz's son, I have no doubt that you would make an amazing father." Boden paused for a moment before asking, "Has she given you any indication of what she plans to do?"
"We've not had a lot of time to talk, but I think she wants to keep it, but will do whatever the OB says would be best," Kelly replied.
"I'm assuming I'll need to get a relief lieutenant for that shift, then?" Boden questioned.
Kelly nodded, "If you could get one for the next couple of shifts, actually, I'd appreciate it, Chief. She…" Kelly sighed, worry evident on his face. "She's been really sick with the pregnancy. She's sick nearly all day, can hardly keep anything down, and she's lost a lot of weight. I'm not sure I want to leave her alone for too long right now," he explained.
"Of course," Boden replied, understanding Kelly's concern. Donna hadn't had too much morning sickness, thankfully, but he knew some women got hit with it hard. "Is there anything else I can do for you?"
"Can you not tell anyone else right now? She doesn't even know I'm here; we've not discussed telling anyone, but I doubt she'd want anyone to know before the appointment Wednesday, just in case," Kelly explained, standing up.
Boden nodded as he stood up and walked Kelly to the front door. "Absolutely. My lips are sealed. But know that I'm here if you need anything," he informed the squad lieutenant. "You're always welcome in our home."
"Thanks, Chief," Kelly said. He turned and has just started down the sidewalk when Boden called after him.
"Oh, and Kelly? Tell Gabby that I said hi, and that she's always welcome here or at 51."