A/N: Erin and Jay are starting to realize that they can't just pick up where they left off. They'll eventually figure their relationship out, I promise. Just give them some time.

Jay slowly made his way to Erin's hotel room, unsure of what kind of reception he'd get. Antonio had told him that he and Erin needed to talk through some stuff and that she was expecting him, but he was still concerned that she wouldn't actually want to see him. He took a deep breath before reaching up to knock on her door.

"Hi," Erin said nervously as she opened the door, stepping back so Jay could enter.

"Hey," Jay replied, equally as nervous. "You, uh, I was worried when I got home and couldn't find you."

"Sorry," Erin apologized. "I know I should have at least texted or called, but I was afraid you'd try to talk me out of it." Actually, she'd been more afraid that he wouldn't try to talk her out of it, and she wasn't sure she would have been able to handle that, but she couldn't admit that to him.

Jay saw the hurt and uncertainty on Erin's face and wanted nothing more than to reach out and pull her into his arms, but he restrained himself, unsure of how she'd react. "Why'd you do it?" he asked gently. "Why'd you leave?"

Erin sighed. "I told you in my note. It wasn't fair for Cami and me to continue to disrupt your life; not anymore."

"But you weren't a disruption," Jay insisted.

Erin shook her head. "Come on, Jay. You can't tell me that going from being a bachelor to having two people, one of them a two year old, wasn't a disruption."

"Erin, having you and Cami there wasn't a disruption because I loved every minute of it. Three years ago you left for New York and I thought I'd never see you again. These past two weeks with you, and with Cami, have been amazing. I adore Cami; she's amazing. Just like her mom," Jay said softly.

Erin fought back against the tears that threatened to fall, shaking her head. "Jay, stop. Please. You don't have to do this."

"I don't have to do what?" Jay asked, puzzled.

"You don't have to keep pretending that you still have feelings for me," Erin replied, turning her back on him as she lost the battle against her tears. "I know you heard my conversation with Hank last night. I also know you didn't sleep in bed with me last night, and I saw you pull away today when you were going to touch me. It's okay; I'm okay with it. It was stupid for us to think we could just pick up where we left off."

The pieces all fell together in Jay's head then. She'd left because she'd thought that he didn't love her anymore. She really thought that what she'd told Hank last night was enough to change his feelings for her, and he hadn't helped matters by not going to bed last night and deciding not to touch her that morning.

"Er," Jay said softly, reaching out and placing his hands on her shoulders, gently turning her around. His heart broke at the sight of tears streaking down her face, knowing that he was the cause of them. He pulled her against him, wrapping his arms around her and he was thankful when she didn't resist.

"Nothing that you say could ever make me stop loving you, Erin," Jay assured her. "I didn't come to bed last night because Hank and I fell asleep on the couch, and the reason I pulled my hand back this morning is because you'd flinched when I'd touched you last night. I didn't want to do anything to scare you or make you feel uncomfortable. I still love you. I will always love you. Nothing you said last night changed that in any way. The only thing it did was make me sad and angry that I hadn't been there for you, that I hadn't been able to protect you, and that I still wasn't able to protect you."

Erin rested her head against Jay's chest, savoring the feeling of his arms around her. One thing that hadn't changed was how safe she always felt in his arms. When he was holding her, it made her feel like everything would be okay, like nothing could ever hurt her. "You saw how bad it was after Nadia died. I was afraid that me admitting last night that I just wanted to get high would make you change your mind; that you'd decide you didn't want to be with me anymore," she confessed.

Jay reached up and tilted her chin up to look at him. "Erin, you being honest about how you're feeling will never make me stop loving you. The fact that you admitted that you wanted to do drugs, but fought against it, only made me love you that much more because of how far you've come. Despite what you may think, you will never be like Bunny. You're so much better than her, and so much stronger."

"I wish I could believe that as easily as everyone else seems to," Erin whispered.

"You'll believe it someday," Jay assured her. "Until then, you'll just have to believe the rest of us when we tell you." He paused for a moment, looking at her before slowly leaning his head down and capturing her lips in his.

Erin pulled away after a few seconds and rested her forehead against his chest. "Jay, I can't. We can't."

Jay looked at her, confused. "Why not?"

Erin looked back up at him, tears shining in her eyes. "Because it's not just me now. I have Cami. I can't do this to her; it's not fair."

"What do you mean?" Jay asked. "Can't do what to her?"

"I can't get into a relationship with you, not when we both know how it will end. It will end with me heading back to New York while you stay here in Chicago. There's no other way for it to end. I can't do that to her," Erin stated sadly. "When we left your place today, she was so upset. She was crying for you. I have to think about what's best for her." She sighed sadly. "I can't go back with you, Jay. It's not fair to her. I'm sorry."

"We can figure it out, Erin," Jay insisted. "People do long distance relationships all the time. We'll make it work."

"And then what, Jay? We see each other a few times a year and that's the extent of our relationship? That's not fair to either one of us," Erin retorted.

"I'll move to New York," Jay said emphatically. "If that's what it takes for us to be together, then that's what I'll do."

Erin shook her head, pulling away. "Jay, you can't give up your career here for me. You'd be miserable. We both know that. It wouldn't be fair to you. You love it here. You love working in Intelligence."

"None of that matters to me if it means I can't be with you," Jay informed her. "I'd give up everything if it means I get to be with the woman that I love."

"Jay…I can't let you do that. You'd end up resenting me. And besides, it's not just me anymore. Cami…she's my whole life. Things are different now than they were three years ago. Being with me would mean being a part of Cami's life. You'd be taking on a two year old," Erin argued.

"I don't care," Jay insisted. "I adore Cami. I know things are different. Cami is your priority and always will be. But you don't have to do this alone. I want to be with you. I want to watch Cami grow up; I want to be a part of her life."

Erin bit her lip as she considered everything Jay had said. "Why?" she asked finally.

"Because I love you. Because I walked out on you three years ago, and as a result of that, I lost you. I never thought I'd get you back, but then I walked into the bullpen to see a mini Erin sitting at Antonio's desk. I thought for sure I was imagining things, but then Burgess said you were in Hank's office, that you were back in Chicago and that the little girl was yours. I used to dream about being with you and raising a family together. I always pictured a little girl who looked just like you and a little boy who looked like me," Jay told her, reaching out to wipe a tear off of Erin's cheek that had fallen while he was talking. "I'd given up on that dream, but then you and Cami were there, and it was like it was finally coming true.

"For a few minutes, I thought maybe Cami was my daughter, but I knew you wouldn't do that to me, that you wouldn't keep my child a secret from me. When Hank confirmed that she wasn't mine, my heart was broken because I thought you'd moved on. I thought any hope of being with you was gone. But then you were there, in my apartment, telling me what happened. You were looking at me the way you used to look at me before I screwed everything up," Jay continued. "Then just a couple of nights later you were telling me the words I'd dreamed of you saying a million times since you left: you still loved me. I promised myself that this time I wasn't going to screw it up. I'm not going to throw away our second chance, Erin. If that means moving to New York and being a full time house husband until I can find a job, then that's what I'll do. I'm not giving up on you, Erin."

"House husband, huh?" Erin murmured as she took a step towards Jay.

"Mhmm," Jay replied, stepping forward to close the distance between them.

"I don't deserve you, Jay Hallstead," Erin whispered, looking into his eyes before kissing him.

Jay wrapped his arms around Erin, kissing her back, and she deepened the kiss. Her tongue asked for entrance to his mouth and he granted it. His hands moved to her sides, slipping under her shirt to rest on her bare skin. Erin gasped and pulled back slightly, but didn't break the kiss. Jay began to remove his hands, but Erin reached down to stop him.

"No," she whispered. "It's okay."

Jay looked into her eyes, wanting to make sure she was really okay, before leaning down and capturing her lips in his once again. Her hands roamed his body as their tongues danced together in their mouths.

Finally, Jay broke the kiss, leaning his forehead against Erin's and moving one of his hands up to cup her face. "Erin…" he breathed. As much as he wanted to continue, as much as he wanted to carry her into the bedroom and reacquaint himself with her body, he knew she wasn't ready yet. He knew they needed to stop now before things went too far; the last thing he wanted to do right now was trigger her at all. "I can't. We can't."

Erin nodded. She knew Jay was right, as much as she hated it. As much as she wanted to feel his hands on her body; as much as she wanted to feel him inside her again, she knew it was too soon. She wanted so badly to be ready, but she knew she wasn't. "I'm sorry," she murmured.

Jay shook his head. "You have nothing to be sorry about," he told her gently.

Before either of them could say more, they were interrupted by a knock on the door. "Saved by the bell," Erin laughed softly as she made her way to the door. She was surprised when Jay reached out and grabbed her arm, stopping her.

"I'll get it," he told her, his other hand already on his service weapon.

Erin rolled her eyes, but didn't argue, knowing it was pointless. Instead, she used the extra few minutes it bought her to try and compose herself. The last thing she needed was Hank or Antonio walking in and being able to tell how she and Jay had been spending their time.

"Mommy!" Cami came barreling into the room, obviously hyped up on the sugar from the ice cream, and wrapped her arms around Erin's legs.

Erin smiled, leaning down and picking up the toddler. "Hi, Peanut! Did you enjoy your ice cream?"

Cami nodded. "Yummy chocwate!" Before she could say more, she was distracted by the realization that her Uncle Jay was there and immediately began squirming to get down. "Unca Jay! Chocwate ice cweam!"

Jay laughed as he approached the little girl, reaching out and taking her from her mom. "Hey, squirt. I like chocolate ice cream, too."

Hank walked over to Erin as Jay kept Cami occupied. "You doin' okay, kid?" he asked, hugging her.

"I'm okay," Erin assured him. "I just…needed some space to figure some things out."

Hank glanced at Jay knowingly. "And did you get them figured out?"

Erin nodded, unable to keep from smiling. "Yeah, we did," she replied. "But…you might be losing one of your detectives when I go back to New York."

Hank shook his head, but he was smiling. "Do you plan to take the whole unit with you one by one?" he joked.

Erin laughed. "As tempting as that sounds, no. I think I'll stop with one."

"Everyone's going to miss you when you do leave," Hank informed her. "I'll miss you when you leave."

"I know; as anxious as I am to get back home so that things can get back to normal, I'm going to be sad when it's time to leave," Erin admitted. "I've loved getting to see everyone again and spend time with them, despite the circumstances. And it's been good for Cami to be able to spend time with you. Seeing her interact with everyone in the unit…" she sighed, "it makes me miss it even more. Back in New York, it's just Cami and me. I mean, Liv's there, too, but we're both busy, so we don't get to see her nearly as much as I'd like. But here…she has the entire unit as her aunts and uncles and she absolutely adores them." She forced a smile, not wanting to think about leaving right now. "I guess we'll just have to come visit as much as we can."

"I'd like that," Hank replied. "I've gotten kinda used to having you around again."

"So, what's the plan?" Antonio asked, walking over to them. "Do I need to camp out here tonight, or are you going back to Jay's?"

Erin thought for a moment. "Umm…we didn't actually talk about that," she admitted, her face flushing.

Antonio grinned knowingly. "You two did actually talk, right?" he teased, dodging Erin's hand as she reached out to smack him on his arm.

"Umm…I was wondering," Erin began hesitantly. "Hank, do you think you could take Cami for the night? I, uh, Jay…we have some things to work out and talk about it, and it would be easier without Cami around."

"I can take her for the night," Antonio offered before Hank could respond, surprising them both. "I love spending time with her, and I have Eva tonight. I know she'd love Cami."

"Are you sure?" Erin asked. "She's hyped up from all the sugar, so it might be a late night, especially since she'll be in a new place."

"I don't mind," Antonio assured her. "I've raised two kids, remember? I know all the tricks."

"Okay," Erin agreed. She walked over to Jay and Cami. "Cami, you get to have a sleepover with Uncle Tonio tonight at his place," she informed her daughter excitedly, hoping that the excitement would be contagious. Cami had only spent one night apart from her, and that had been with Hank, someone that she was a bit more familiar with, and in a familiar place."

"Yay!" Cami exclaimed, clapping her hands.

Jay looked at Erin questioningly and she shrugged. "I just figured we could use some time by ourselves," she informed him.

Thirty minutes later, Antonio was heading out the door with Cami. Hank turned to Jay and Erin. "Come on; I'll give you a ride home."