Kelly woke up with a start to the sound of someone pounding on his door. He sat up groggily and stumbled his way towards the door. "Coming!" he called. When he opened it, he found a worried looking Casey standing on the other side. He was instantly wide awake. "What is it? Is it Gabby? Did something happen?" he asked, panicking, looking around for his keys.
"Gabby's fine," Casey assured him. "God, Kelly. You scared me. You weren't answering your phone; no one could get a hold of you. We were worried about you."
It was only then that Kelly realized it was dark outside. Shit. He'd fallen asleep on the couch and, from the looks of it, had slept most of the day.
"When you didn't show back up at the hospital, we got worried. Then you didn't answer your phone, so I was the one who got sent over here to see if you were dead or just drunk out of your mind," Casey informed him.
"Neither," Kelly replied shortly. "I just sat down for a moment, and I must have fallen asleep." He shrugged. "It's fine; Gabby has Antonio. She's in good hands. He'll take care of her until she's able to go back to Puerto Rico. She doesn't need me anymore."
Casey sighed. Antonio had filled him in on what had happened between Gabby and Kelly that morning, and it was clear that Gabby's words had affected his friend. He'd never seen a sober Kelly in this state before, but there was no smell of alcohol on Kelly's breath, no empty bottles sitting around, so he believed Kelly when he said he'd fallen asleep.
"She's been asking for you, Kelly. She's worried sick," Casey informed his friend.
Kelly chortled. "Worried sick about someone who's nothing? I find that hard to believe." He ran his hand through his hair. "God, Matt, how could I have been so stupid? I'd convinced myself that she loved me, but what she really loved was the idea that we could be a family. Now there's no baby, so I'm nothing."
"Kelly, she didn't mean that," Casey insisted. "She's hurting, Kelly. She wasn't thinking when she said that."
"She's hurting?" Kelly exploded. "She's hurting? I'm hurting, too, Matt! I sat by her bedside for two days, hoping and praying that she'd wake up, that she'd pull through, all the while mourning the daughter that we lost. Then she wakes up, and I'm the one that had to tell her that our baby didn't make it. The baby that she wanted more than anything. The baby that she risked her life for. So, sorry if I don't buy that excuse."
Casey felt guilt wash over him. None of them had thought about how hard all of this had been on Kelly. They'd been so focused on Gabby that they'd ignored Kelly; they'd forgotten that the whole time he was holding vigil at Gabby's bedside, he'd also been grieving for the child that they'd lost. Casey had been in Kelly's shoes before; he knew how hard it was to lose a baby that you wanted so desperately, that you were so excited for. How could he have been so stupid as to not think about how this had impacted his friend?
"You're right, Kelly. I'm sorry. We've all been so focused on Gabby that none of us stopped to check on you, to see how you were doing," Casey apologized.
Kelly shrugged. "You know, being passed out drunk doesn't sound so bad right now. At least then it wouldn't hurt so bad." He turned and looked at Matt. "I was so excited to be a dad," he choked out through his tears. "I wanted that baby more than anything. Then she was gone, but at least I still had the woman I loved. But now? Not I don't have either of those, Matt." As Casey turned to leave, Kelly added, "Tell Gabby I'll see her tomorrow morning."
Casey trudged down the hallway to Gabby's room, his shoulders slumped. He'd never seen Kelly like this; not when he found out that Renee's baby wasn't his, not when they lost Shay, not even when Anna died. He was concerned about his friend. He was glad Kelly was staying at his apartment tonight rather than the hospital; he needed the sleep. But he knew that sleep wouldn't heal a broken heart. The only one who could help with that was Gabby.
"Did you find him?" Gabby asked worriedly as soon as she saw Casey walk into the room. "Is he here?"
"I found him," Casey replied. "He was at his apartment; he'd sat down on the couch and fallen asleep," he explained. He saw Gabby searching the hallways behind him, waiting for Kelly to appear, and dreaded what he had to say next. "He's not here, Gabby." Gabby and Antonio both looked at Casey with shocked expressions. "He needs some time," Casey continued. He glanced at Antonio, hoping he would see that Casey needed to talk to Gabby alone, and thankfully, Antonio excused himself.
Casey walked over to Gabby's bed and sat on the edge. "He's hurting, Gabby," he told her gently. "He lost the baby, too. But he wasn't able to process his grief because he spent nearly every waking moment by your side, waiting to see whether or not he'd lose you, too. He was relieved when you were finally out of the woods, and you woke up, and then he had to tell you the news that he was still processing himself.
"All of that took a toll on him," Casey continued, "but he didn't care, because all he could think of was you. All he cared about was making sure that you were okay; that he was there for you."
"But then I threw it in his face by telling him there was nothing for me in Chicago," Gabby stated.
"It was more than just that, Gabby," Casey replied. "Kelly loves you. He's in love with you. If you'd seen him these past few days…he was terrified that he was going to lose you. You woke up and he felt like he could finally breath again. But then, at least in his mind, he lost you anyways." Matt saw tears forming in Gabby's eyes and hated knowing he was the one causing them, but he knew Gabby needed to hear what he had to say. "Gabby, he's convinced that you only cared about him because of the baby. He's convinced himself that the feelings he thought you had for him weren't real."
Casey took a deep breath before continuing, knowing that what he had to say next would hurt her more than everything he'd said before. "He doesn't plan to come back to the hospital tonight, Gabby. He said to tell you that he'll see you tomorrow morning."
"I screwed up, Matt," Gabby cried. "I didn't mean what I said this morning; I wasn't thinking. I never meant to hurt him."
"Gabby, I need you to be completely honest with me, and with yourself," Casey informed her. "Do you love Kelly?"
Gabby was silent for a moment as she reflected back on the last several months. She thought about New York, about how much they'd enjoyed their time together, about how gentle and sweet Kelly had been. Then she thought of that day that she'd been waiting for him outside his apartment, and how, even before he'd known she was pregnant with his baby, he'd been by her side in the bathroom, helping her through her morning sickness. She thought of the times she'd used pregnancy hormones as an excuse to have sex with him when really it was because she was scared of telling him the real reason: because she had feelings for him. She thought about how scared she'd been while watching the news coverage of the movie theater fire, about how she'd felt both relieved and terrified when she'd gotten the call from Boden. She thought about how he'd been there by her side when she woke up, how he'd held her in his arms while she sobbed after he told her that the baby didn't make it.
"Yes," Gabby replied finally. "I love him, Matt. I'm in love with him." She looked terrified. "Is it too late, Matt? Did I screw everything up because I was too stupid and scared to let myself admit that I loved him?"
Casey shook his head. "No," he assured her. "Kelly-, he's stubborn, but he'll come around. I promise. It might take some time, but that man loves you too much to give up on you."
When Kelly arrived at the hospital the next morning, Gabby was still asleep. He stood in the doorway for a few minutes, debating whether or not to go in when Antonio looked up and saw him. Gabby's brother stood up from where he sat next to her bed and Kelly steeled himself for a lecture, well aware of how protective the Dawson siblings were of each other, but the lecture never came. Instead, Antonio placed a hand on Kelly's shoulder and squeezed it before walking out of the room.
Kelly slowly made his way over to Gabby's bed and took a seat in the chair Antonio had just vacated. He looked at Gabby as she slept, thinking back to the last time she'd caught him watching her while she slept, just a couple of days before everything happened.
"You're doing it again," Gabby said sleepily, her eyes still closed.
"Doing what?" he asked innocently, grinning.
Gabby opened her eyes. "Watching me sleep. You know I think it's creepy," she complained.
"I can't help it," Kelly protested. "You just look so peaceful and beautiful."
Gabby rolled her eyes. "Beautiful is not a word I'd use to describe myself right now. Fat and bloated? Yes. Peaceful and beautiful? No."
Kelly laughed as he reached out to place his hand on her stomach. "Nah; you're pregnant with our baby. That makes you beautiful, not fat."
Gabby smiled as she placed her hand over his, moving it slightly down and over. "She's been kicking up a storm this morning," she told him.
Kelly grinned as he felt a kick against his hand. "She's just practicing her soccer moves," he replied.
"I'd prefer her practice her soccer moves somewhere that isn't my ribs or my bladder," Gabby replied dryly.
Kelly laughed again. "You hear that, baby girl?" he asked, leaning over Gabby's stomach. "You need to stop kicking your mom so much." He looked up to see Gabby smiling at him. "What?"
"Nothing," she replied. "I just never knew you could be so sappy before."
"Oh, you think I'm sappy, huh?" he asked, a mischievous glint in his eyes. He began kissing Gabby's stomach, working his way up her body until he reached her face, capturing her lips in his. "What about this? Is this sappy?" he murmured.
Gabby drew in a shaking breath as the hand that had been resting on her stomach moved lower, slipping beneath the waistband of her panties, and rubbing one a finger in a circle on her clitoris. "No," she replied, her voice rough with desire. "That, Kelly Severide, is sexy."
"Yeah? What about this?" he asked, slowly pushing first one finger, then another, inside Gabby.
Gabby moaned, her hips lifting off the bed, pushing against Kelly's fingers. "Yes," she moaned.
"Good," replied Kelly. With his free hand, he tugged her panties down before withdrawing his fingers from inside Gabby, quickly replacing them with his tongue.
"Oh, god, Kelly." Gabby gasped. Kelly began flicking her clit with his tongue, and she fisted the sheet beneath her with one hand while tangling another in Kelly's hair. She felt herself getting closer and closer to the edge as Kelly continued his ministrations. He began slipping his tongue inside her once again, moving his finger to her clit. "Kelly!" Gabby cried as she came.
Kelly smiled, turning his attention to her inner things, kissing his way up her body, pushing her shirt, or rather his shirt that she'd claimed as her own, up as he went. When he reached her breasts, he pulled back for a second, staring at them. "Damn," he rasped, grinning, before proceeding to take one of Gabby's nipples in his mouth, sucking and nipping.
Gabby hadn't known it was possible to get so turned on by just one word. "Kelly," she whispered, writhing beneath him. "Too many clothes."
Kelly pulled back just long enough to strip off his shirt and boxers as well as Gabby's shirt, before continuing his way up her body. He stopped to pay some extra attention to that spot at the base of her neck that Gabby's enjoyed so much, groaning as Gabby began writhing beneath him again. "Gabby…" He felt her thrust against him and his already hard cock grew even harder. "Damn, woman," he whispered. In one swift move he slipped inside her, both of them moaning at the sensation.
"You drive me crazy; you know that?" he whispered against her neck.
"Mhmm," she murmured as she shifted her hips beneath him, eliciting another moan from him
"Damn, baby, you're good," he whispered, his lips now even with her ear. He increased the pace, causing Gabby to gasp. Her nails dug into his back and he felt her begin to tighten around him.
"Kelly, please," Gabby whispered. "I'm so close."
Kelly obliged her, rolling his hips and thrusting just so, hitting just the right spot, sending her over the edge. He followed behind soon after, his cock pulsing inside her.
Afterwards they'd laid there, catching their breath, Gabby's head resting on his chest, his arm wrapped around her, tracing lazy circles on her side, and all he could think of was how much he loved her. "Gabby?"
"Hmm?" she responded.
"I'm glad you came back. To Chicago, that is. Even if there wasn't a baby, I'd still be happy that you're here," he told her softly.
Gabby lifted her head up, looking at him. "What do you mean?"
Kelly shrugged. "After we left New York…I missed you. I didn't realize it at the time, but I did. My life felt empty. I figured it was because of the breakup, but I think it was more than that. Stella had already been gone for months before we broke up. There was something else missing. I realize now that it was you."
Gabby laid her head back down on his chest. "I thought about you, you know. After I got back to Puerto Rico. It seemed like every time I turned on the radio Kiss Me was playing, and it made me think of you. Of us. That second night…I enjoyed it. All of it, not just the sex. And every time I heard the song, it reminded me of that night."
"Out of all the hotels, in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine," Kelly murmured.
"Kelly?" Gabby had woken up at some point while Kelly was lost in the memory. Her voice drew him back to the present.
"You're awake," Kelly said, flashing her a smile.
To anyone else, it would have seemed as though he'd forgotten about her words the day before. But Gabby saw the sadness that was hiding behind his smile. She'd seen his smile far too much over the past several months to believe that the one he'd just given her was anything more than an attempt to cover up his hurt.
"You came back," Gabby said softly.
Those words, and the sadness in her tone, propelled Kelly out of his chair. He took her hand and brushed her cheek with the back of his other hand. "Gabby," he murmured, "did you really think I wouldn't come back? Did you think I'd just leave you?"
"I wouldn't have blamed you," Gabby replied, tears pooling in her eyes. "After what I said yesterday, I don't think anyone would have."
Kelly's heart broke. She really thought he could just leave her? "Oh, baby," he whispered, leaning down to kiss her forehead. "I could never do that."
Gabby's heart skipped a beat. He'd called her baby. It wasn't the first time; he'd used that term of endearment several times during sex, but she'd never heard him say it outside of that. "I'm sorry," she managed to say through the tears that were now streaming down her cheeks. "I'm so sorry, Kelly. I didn't mean it."
"Shh," Kelly murmured, stroking her hair. "I know you didn't. I shouldn't have reacted the way I did."
Gabby shook her head. "No, Kelly. It wasn't fair to you. You were hurting, too, and instead of realizing that I only hurt you more." She looked up at him. "I was wrong when I said there's nothing holding me here in Chicago. My heart is holding me here."
Kelly searched her face, wondering if she meant what he thought she meant, or if he was reading into it. "Your heart?" he questioned.
Gabby nodded. "I seem to have lost it to this squad lieutenant I know," she answered, biting her lip nervously.
Kelly opened his mouth, but no words came out. He tried again with the same results before finally just giving up and kissing her, hard. She kissed him back.