8

#

Normally they would be on the road again by now but due to the snowstorm, they decided to stay another night. Normally Eris would hate staying here, but because of Terrin, his stay had been rather nice. He did notice the guards following him around the house in silence, but he couldn't really blame them. He would have done the same. Yesterday, he could see Terrin through the window as she held Aditta. Viviane and Kallias right behind them, the later had his arm thrown over the shoulder of his wife. He had seen how the white bears laid down on the snowy grass, how Aditta pulled and stroked on their furs, and they didn't move an inch. When Kallias looked up towards the window he was gazing out, he quickly stepped back and browsed through the books again.

He now sat in a large sunroom, the garden in front of him covered in snow. Thick snowflakes were still crashing down from the heavens, making the carpet of snow even higher. The white snow was almost blinding, probably was, wasn't it for the special tainted windows. Two strange things happened since yesterday, two things he'd never experienced before.

First, he was gods damned jealous when she left the party with some Fae male. Had to hear her moaning in pleasure the whole fucking night. Jealous. In his entire existence, he had never once been jealous. He wanted things, yes and he usually got them. But jealousy. Never. And now he was jealous about a woman he barely knew.

Second: longing. When he saw her holding Aditta, he longed for a family. With her. When Terrin said that Aditta was the most beautiful thing she ever laid eyes on, that was all he could think about when he looked at her. The other night when he arrived at the party, he stopped breathing for a second when he saw her. And he couldn't help but ask her to dance. And for a moment when he thought she was going to say no, it felt like the ground began crumbling down beneath him. They way she moved with him, it was like his body remembered her, even if he didn't. Dancing with Nesta was amazing, she looked beautiful and danced so gracefully, she captured his attention for a moment. But dancing with Terrin, it was like his body was made to follow her. Through every movement, through every step. Her movements weren't flawless, but she was absolutely mesmerizing.

Fuck! What was wrong with him. He let his head drop in his hands and groaned. He knew this woman for just a few days. How could he feel like this?

"Already regretting your decision to follow me to the Night Court?" Her voice came out amused. But when he turned, her face was void of emotion.

"It's not that." He followed her movements as she sat down on the armchair next to his, her eyes on the garden. "Think the storm will be over tomorrow?"

"So, desperate to get out of here?"

"For once, no." She slowly turned to him, surprise filling her face. "You don't have to look so surprised."

She laughed softly. And he wanted to bottle that sound up. "Well, that's a first." One side of his mouth tilted upwards.

"What?" Her laughter died down, but a smile remained on her lips. A true smile, not wide enough to show him the dimple in her cheek but close enough. His breath got stuck in his throat. The smile disappeared when she leaned forward, looking worried. "Eris." Fuck, the way she said his name made him suck in a breath. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." He leaned back in his armchair. "I was just surprised you could laugh when I was the only one present."

She leaned back in her chair, her head tilted upwards, baring her throat. Her eyes were closed when she said. "You used to be one of the two who could make me laugh. Who could make me laugh until my stomach ached." Her head lolled to the side, his way, but her eyes remained closed. Those beautiful green eyes remained hidden behind her eyelids. "But apparently, you're not as funny anymore."

"Maybe I'm only funny with people I like."

Her lips twitched upwards again. "So, you haven't been funny in over three centuries then."

He couldn't help it, he laughed. Loud, full and real. He hasn't laughed in forever. He couldn't really remember the last time he laughed like that. Terrin must have thought the same thing because she had opened her eyes, her bright green eyes were fully fixed on him. As his laughter finally calmed down, he turned his head to look at her. They were mere inches apart, their eyes fixed on each other. Green meets amber.

"What?" He breathed after a few minutes of just staring at each other.

"It's just-" She sounded as breathless as him. "It's the first time you reminded me of the old you."

He looked away from her. It took everything in him, but he did. It was just too hard to see the hope in her eyes, the hope of finding the old him. Whoever he was. His eyes fell on her bare arm. He grasped her arm softly and turned it over.

"It's healed." He murmured as his thumb grazed over the healed spot. Her fingers lightly touched his forearm.

"Yeah, Viv dragged me to the healer's office the moment she spotted it."

"Good."

"Everyone is so overprotective." She rolled her eyes. Her fingers caressed his sleeve. And oh, how much he wished he wore something with short sleeves right now. "Didn't know you cared, Vanserra."

"This was my fault, Terrin. I've hurt many people before, but there are only a few I regret."

She bit the side of her lip, looking down at their arms. "What about Morrigan?"

The grip on her arm tightened. "You know about that?" Her fingers didn't stop caressing his sleeve, now a little firmer so she touched his arm. "I regret how I handled it, that I didn't help her. But you know what would have happened if I so much have laid a finger on her."

"Yeah, she would have hated it there. Did you want to marry her?"

His grip loosened on her arm, but he didn't let go. He started stroking her arm again. "Never." He said quietly. "It was a set-up from Beron."

"I'm surprised he didn't just set you up with another bride."

"He tried to, believe me. But after what happened to Morrigan, he didn't want it to be out in the open."

"So, why aren't you married? Or have you found your Mate?"

"I'm not married because he didn't find any woman to be good enough. Much to his annoyance, much to my relief. I've never wanted to marry anyone." He saw something flicker over her face, her brows pulling slightly together, but she said.

"You didn't think they could make you happy? None of them?"

"They all had their traits. One would be a good fuck for maybe six months before it would get boring, the other was intellectual but boring as hell. The other was a great healer but didn't even dare to look me in the eye. Etcetera, etcetera."

"Oh, poor little High Lord." She teased. "All these women waiting in line to marry the next High Lord of the Autumn Court and here he is whining."

"Hey." He chuckled, pushing her arm a little. "Like you aren't picky. Have you ever had a relationship?"

She pursed her lips, a smile behind it. "It's not being picky. I just like my freedom and with my job, it's better not to get attached." She looked out to the garden. "But I had a relationship once."

"What happened?"

"He was a mortal man and he got sick when he was forty years old. He died in my arms. We were together for twenty years."

"Did you love him?" Twenty years was long for a mortal, but for a Fae, it was small in comparison to their lifespan.

"With everything in me. He was the first person I loved since-" She stopped talking and his fingers froze on her arm. She cleared her throat. "After that, I never let anyone get close to me again."

Their eyes connected again and stayed there. None of them spoke, both of them still with their hands on each other's arms. When a throat cleared from the doorway, they quickly looked away. Viviane stood there with Aditta on her hip, a knowing smile on her lips.

But she just said, "Thank you for the necklace, Terrin." She twirled a silver necklace that hung around Aditta's neck. Was that what he saw in her bag earlier? It was a beautiful silver necklace with a white/rose-gold snowflake in the middle.

#

They left early the next morning. The storm had passed, and the sun was now brightly shining down on them. They had been riding for a whole day. It was a quiet ride today after their talk yesterday. They switched on sitting with Walt on the riding bench, or together in the back. Just reading in silence. They decided to keep driving, to keep going. They were going to pass The Middle Court and none of them wanted to stop in that territory. When night fell, it took almost an hour for Terrin to convince Walt to go sleep in the carriage.

"You should get some sleep, High Lord."

"I'm good here." He answered, resting his feet on the board in front of them. While she was packed in a thick new cloak, gifted from the High Lord of the Winter Court. It was a thick, silver-white cloak with golden threat, a fur neckline and cap that held her warm. It was a stunning cloak and kept all her body warmth within. He was just in a shirt with long sleeves. The fire in his veins keeping him warm.

"Stubborn man." She muttered and Eris let out a chuckle. Her lips curled upwards despite herself.

"Says the stubborn woman."

She flipped him off and laughed quietly into the dark night. She felt him watching her, watching her mouth. A cold breeze went over them, and she shivered. She could use his flame but was too stubborn to ask for it. She knew she could be stubborn, that's why she didn't object him. But he shifted closer, pressing himself to her side. Letting his body warmth do its job. She glanced at him with a raised eyebrow.

"I don't trust myself to conjure a flame and burn you again if I would fall asleep. This is the safer option." He said looking at the dark road ahead of them.

"Alright." She said. "Let me just -" She shifted, unhooking her cloak to throw it over his shoulders too. His body warmth spread across her body in seconds. Then she took another blanket and placed it on their laps. She wanted to grab the reigns again when he said.

"Hold on." He lifted his arm and wrapped it around her shoulders, tugging her close to him. "How does it feel?"

"Better, thank you." She could focus better on the dark road now that she wasn't cold anymore. Although the feel of his fingers on her shoulder was a distraction.

It had been a shock yesterday to see even a glimpse of the man he used to be. And when they talked about Morrigan and David, it was all heavy stuff. It was never her intention to get into such deep conversations with him. It was supposed to be a quiet ride to the Night Court and then he would leave her alone. She wondered if it would be possible for him to become the man she knew after everything he had done. She had loved him. Loved him with her whole heart, like she loved Lucien. Or that's what she had thought. Him forgetting her, hurt more than she thought it would. Hurt more than she could bare. That's why she left. She didn't know what to make of him now. Maybe meeting Lucien would clear somethings up.

#

An hour after Eris shared his warmth with her, she fell asleep against him. He took over the reins, and adjusted his arm around her, letting it slide to her waist. He hugged her closer to her him and her head fell against his chest. He was glad she was asleep so she couldn't hear his fast heartbeat.

The thing about not conjuring a flame in case of hurting her again was partly true. This was just a good excuse to get closer to her. He looked down at her, her hair had fallen over her face, covering her completely. With his index finger, he pushed her hair back, tugging it behind her pointed ear. She snuggled closer to him, letting out a deep sigh.

Remember! Remember! Remember! He screamed inside his head. He ran a hand through his shoulder-length red hair in frustration when nothing came up. How is he supposed to remember her name, if he can't remember her. Ever since she appeared in his life, he had never smiled or laughed so much in such a short period of time. Or much longer either, to be honest. He focussed back on the dark road, even as Terrin's hand curled around his shirt, her cold fingers brushing against his hot skin. Focus. Focus. With her pressed against him, her fingers touching his skin, he didn't think about Under the Mountain. About everything he had done or had to do to get through those forty-nine years. Right now, he could just think about her.

Just before the sun appeared behind the mountains, she woke up. Her hand was now fully under his shirt, palm resting on his abs. She looked up, her nose grazing his jaw. Without any shame of the way she woke up, she said, her voice husky. Fuck, she was damn sexy.

"Morning, High Lord."

He couldn't help but chuckle. Her eyes widened, but she didn't remove her hand or her head that was still inches away from his. "You have no shame, do you?"

"I've lost the count of times I woke up like this." Her breath ghosted over his neck.

"With a male?"

"With you." She answered and pushed herself up, away from him. Even though his was the one with fire in his veins, he missed her warmth when she shuffled away, just a few inches but enough. "We crossed the border to Dawn." She said examining the surroundings. He had no idea how she knew with just a few seconds glance, but he had learned not to doubt her. "We should take a break. Eat something."

She took the reins from him and guided the horses to the left. Five minutes later, they entered a small village. Just two dozen of small red roofed houses, a large river flowing behind them. Eris heard shuffling in the carriage and knew Walt had woken up.

"Catherine!" One of the villagers greeted Terrin. She was beautiful. She had sun kissed skin and dark brown hair, almost black. Terrin jumped off from the bench with a wide smile.

"Marianne." They hugged fiercely and when she pulled back, the Fae named Marianne kissed her. He blinked at the pair.

"Gods, it's been ages."

"It has." Terrin tucked Marianne's hair behind her ear. "Still as beautiful as ever."

A blush stained the woman's cheeks. "Where is Walt?"

"I'm right here, miss Marianne." The elder Fae stepped out of the carriage fully dressed.

Eris watched them greet; the woman's eyes flickered to him for a second before she whispered to Terrin. "Why are you here with General Asshole?"

Terrin glanced over his shoulder to him, knowing full well he heard it. And she waited for his reaction. At one point he would have called her out on it, disrespecting the heir like that. But now, without him really wanting to, his lips curled upwards. She didn't smile back but her green eyes twinkled.

#

After they ate breakfast at Marianne's home. Which was also the place where she worked. Woods, tools and carvings were spread around her home. He had to admit, she was pretty good at what she does. He picked up a wooden box. He recognised the carvings instantly. It was an oak tree, leaves dancing off the tree into the air. It was a carving of the Dance of Trees. His fingers grazed over the different coloured leaves on the box. The details were extraordinary. Marianne, the wood carver, who had been keeping her distance from him all morning, came up next to him.

"Have you been to the Dance of Trees?" He asked.

"No." She said softly. "But Catherine has talked about it for hours on end. It got stuck in my mind and its found its way out, into this."

"How much?" After a stunned silence from the carver, she named her price. He placed the money in her hands and tucked the box in his pocket. "Keep the change."

"Cat never mentioned she knew the heir to the Autumn Court." She said bravely meeting his eye. "But I figured there is much she doesn't share. But I guess there is history there."

"What makes you think that?" He said, his tone clipped.

"Just the way you look at each other."

"And what way is that?" He stiffened.

"I mean no disrespect, General." She bowed her head. "I don't know you, but I know Cat well enough to see there is something there. What, I don't know, but there is something."

He looked over to where Terrin and Walt were talking as they ate the last of their food. Walt laughed at something she said, his face turning younger because of it. He held back the smile that wanted to appear, knowing that the carver was watching his every move.