CHAPTER 25

DAY 42

AN: Are you guys ready to hear from Ranger? The next chapter (26) has his POV as he gets back to town to find Steph gone. What do you think his reaction will be?

Sunday

FINN POV

I awoke this morning to find Stephanie lying on her stomach with the sheet draped over her from the waist down. The early morning light shining through the windows made it clear how badly she'd suffered at the hands of Durant. I'd seen the faint scars before but never this close and for this long. You wouldn't notice them unless you were focused on them in the right light. I traced along one scar with the tip of my finger. She tensed but didn't shy away. Her trust in me meant the world.

"They're ugly," she whispered but didn't turn over.

"They're a badge of courage." I traced the next faint line.

"He wore this leather belt that he would beat me with when I didn't have the right answers and even when I did."

"You don't have to talk about it." Since her face was turned away from me, I couldn't see her tears, but I heard them in her voice, and it broke something inside me. I wanted to rewind time and make it so she never experienced any of it.

She gathered the sheet to cover her breasts and turned on her side. I wiped away her silent tears as she held her left hand up to show me a surgery scar. "I broke my hand to get the shackle off."

I'd read the official report and knew the facts of her case. Still, seeing the evidence firsthand and hearing her tell what happened made it all too real. I couldn't change what happened, but I could listen now that she was willing to talk.

"There are things I didn't tell the FBI when they interviewed me… things I didn't want them or anyone to know."

"I'm here if you want to confide in me."

"You might be the only person who can understand."

Our lives have been affected by the worst humanity has to offer. I hadn't been abducted and tortured, but Deborah and Katie had been terrorized and killed by a man bent on revenge against me for simply trying to stop him from killing innocents. Most people couldn't fathom the level of suffering we'd endured.

"Whatever you want to tell me won't leave this room."

"I never lost my memory. I remember every detail of every moment since I woke up on that dirty mattress in the cellar."

I hadn't expected her to say that. "Why did you pretend to lose your memory?" I asked as I moved a strand of hair off her forehead.

"I was afraid Agent Kinkade and Barry would want me to lead them to the cellar, and they would find Durant in time to save his life."

She waited for me to say something. To judge her. But I simply asked, "Was Durant alive when you escaped?"

Her nostrils flared, and her eyes lit with an angry fire. "He didn't deserve a swift death. He needed to know what it felt like to be scared, hungry, and thirsty, just like we had. It took all my will to stop beating him with the shackle, but he was still breathing when I left. Every time I woke up in the hospital, I had to decide again if I was going to let him die, and each time, my answer was yes. So I bought as much time as possible to ensure he died a slow and painful death." The rage left her, and she looked down at the sheet she was clenching and twisting in her hands. "Do you think I'm a horrible person?"

"No," I said emphatically so she didn't doubt I meant what I said. "You did what you had to do to survive, and for what it's worth, I think you did the right thing. Maybe not right in the eyes of the law, but sometimes the law doesn't account for everything."

"Those twenty-nine days in the cellar changed me. Everyone wants me to be the same—to be normal—but I'm not."

"How could you be?"

"I thought I was going to die down there. I'd accepted it…wished for it, even."

"But you didn't die. You are a survivor, and I'm damn glad you did." I gathered her into my arms and held her.

STEPH POV

While Finn ran errands in town, I decided to cross another fear from my list. I ate a peanut butter and olive sandwich last night and did fine, so this morning I was going to go down the basement stairs. But first, safeguards needed to be put in place. Namely, arming myself with my gun, turning on the stairway light, and of course, Maggie, my secret weapon.

Gun in hand, I opened the stairway door and carefully reached in to flip the light switch. I am in control, I whispered to myself for courage as I put one foot in front of the other, slowly descending the stairs. I can retreat anytime. It is not a sign of weakness.

Maggie matched me step for step, somehow knowing to go slow and stay by my side. I made it to the small landing and turned to make my final descent into the basement. I breathed a sigh of relief when my feet hit the cushioned rubber-tiled floor.

Maggie licked my hand, giving me the equivalent of a high-five. "We did it, girl. Want to play catch?" I'd accomplished what I'd set out to do, and now I needed to be outside in a wide-open space.

Maggie waited impatiently at the glass doors while I stowed my gun behind the bar. When I finally got the doors open, she trotted over to her bucket of toys. We played in the yard until I heard gravel crunching in the front drive. We ran up the back deck and into the cabin at the same time Finn entered through the front door. He noticed the stairway door was open and came to a complete stop. I could see the gears connecting in his brain as he realized what that meant. Without looking at me, he gave a slight nod which I took as approval and made his way into the kitchen.

"Let me wash my hands, and I'll help you," I said as he placed the bags on the island.

"If you want to put these away, I can bring the rest inside."

After he went outside for a second load, I turned off the stairway light and shut the door. I'd done so well that I thought I'd go into town next weekend with Finn and attempt to go inside the grocery store. It was something to think about. If I could cross that off my list, the only thing left would be eating ice cream, and I didn't have a snowball's chance in hell of conquering that, at least not right now.

After we put the supplies away and ate lunch, I wandered over to the bookcase to find another book to read. Scanning the titles, I stopped on Seeing the World Through Patterns and read the summary. To see the larger picture, you must open your mind to the subtle differences and commonalities in data.

Finn came up behind me. "That's an interesting selection. Patterns are everywhere, but if you don't expect to see them, you won't."

"This sounds similar to how I run background reports on my skips and searches at Rangeman. The information usually has an order, but a closer look at the subject's habits reveals anomalies or outliers that pop out at me." The Merry Men were usually impressed when I pointed out leads they hadn't noticed. More than once, I was treated to a pointed stare as they wondered why I'd focused on that particular puzzle piece. It was obvious to me.

"I have no doubt that you see more than most people."

I shrugged. "I have a process. I print everything out and use my highlighter. It makes it easier."

"What kinds of things do you highlight?"

"I start with the basics and add anything that jumps out at me."

"I'd like to see you at work."

"No, you wouldn't. There's no rhyme or reason for what I do. It frustrates people."

He tilted his head to the side as if looking at me with new eyes. "Oz will love you."

"Oz, the spy? Is he coming here?"

"At some point in the next few weeks, he'll bring your new identification papers, that is, if you still want them?"

"Yes." I didn't need to think about it. That little voice inside me was shouting at me that I needed them. "Why will Oz love me?"

"He also thinks outside the box. Speaking of outside, let's go paddle boarding."

"When will the water be warm enough to swim?" I asked as we walked to the lake and put our boards in the water.

"It depends on your tolerance level, but probably in another week." Staying beside each other, we paddled in the same direction. "Have you ever water skied?"

"No, but I've been pulled on a tube behind a boat. It was a lot of fun. Of course, I was a kid then." I laughed.

"I've got a tube, a kneeboard, and water skis in the garage. You can take your pick or try all of them," Finn challenged.

"All," I said quickly, "but only if you teach me how to drive the boat so you can have a turn in the water."

"Deal," he said. "I only get to ski when Oz comes to visit."

I frowned at the thought of Finn spending so much time alone. "Oz must be a really good friend."

"He's loyal. There's not that many people who can claim that." We settled into a rhythm, paddling peacefully for a while, and then he resumed our conversation about patterns. "I remember you saying you took the job as a bounty hunter in a desperate move to pay your bills but tell me again why you stayed in the job."

"I like the mystery."

"The mystery? What kind of mystery is involved with bounty hunting?"

"You'd be surprised." When his eyebrows rose, I knew he wanted more details. "A lot of my skips are just like you said, find them and bring them in, but some of them have been accused of something they didn't do, and they just need someone to listen to them and help them."

"So, you take it upon yourself to solve their situation." It was a statement, not a question. The man was beginning to know me well.

"My mentor says it's not my job to uncover the truth. He advises me to leave my feelings out of the equation and trust the justice system."

"In a perfect world, that would work, but the system isn't perfect. Some people are wrongfully charged and convicted."

"I can't stop myself from helping. I need to right the wrong my skips have been dealt."

"You're a one-woman justice machine."

It filled me with pride that he thought of me in that light. "You make me sound like a superhero."

"Aren't you?"

Was I?