"Well, Georgiana! Where next?"
Richard's voice came from behind a tall bunch of flowers laid on top of two baskets he held, having insisted on carrying the bulk of their supplies. The whole pile wobbled as he laughed, manoeuvring them until he could peer out from behind them to see his cousin a little better.
"This way," Georgiana said, fighting the urge to laugh herself. She was having a very pleasant day. More pleasant than she had expected it might be, even though she always enjoyed paying calls to the people who made their lives on Pemberley land and whom she knew well. She devoted much of her free time to visits such as these, but making them with Richard, and not Fitzwilliam or Lizzy by her side was a new experience. "There are only a few more stops to make." Georgiana was sure her adventurous cousin was not finding the day half as enjoyable as she was and wished to reassure him that she would not impose upon his generosity very much longer.
"I am in no hurry," Richard assured her, striding on as if he hadn't a care in the world. "And just think if we had not taken Elizabeth's advice the task would take twice as long and even then I would not find it too great a sacrifice." He whistled cheerfully and Georgiana smiled. There was something so very pleasant about being with Richard. Her smile froze. She was sure Lizzy had sensed as much when she suggested their group of four divide into two pairs - Fitzwilliam and Elizabeth taking one path at the fork in the road, Richard and Georgiana the other. Their routes would converge again soon, once all their deliveries had been made. It was a sensible decision, but there was something in the mischievous twinkle in Lizzy's eyes that made Georgiana think that this particular division of labour was not entirely motivated by pragmatism.
She wished to pair Richard and I together. Perhaps she knows I… Georgiana shook her head. She could barely entertain the thought herself, let alone conceive of Elizabeth suspecting it.
"What is the matter, Georgie?" She had not kept pace with her cousin and he seemed to have noticed at last, shortening his long strides and at last stopping altogether to turn back and address her. "Do I make too much haste? Or is your basket too heavy for you? Look, let us make a swap. You can take the flowers and I'm sure then I can manage a third basket…" He tried to juggle his burdens as he spoke and came very close to dropping them altogether.
"Perhaps if I remove my hat and balance it on my head, as I have seen some foreign people do…" He laid down his baskets carefully on an upturned rock and removed his head, smoothing out his dark hair and grinning at her. "What do you think? Is my head empty enough to make a useful shelf?" He turned one way and then another, pulling a face when Georgiana did not immediately answer. She rolled her eyes at his foolishness and placed her basket carefully with his, before perching next to them.
"It is too hot to keep walking just at present. Let's sit for a moment."
Richard did not need to be asked more than once. Tossing his hat onto the pile, he threw himself down beside Georgiana and stretched out, breathing deeply the scent of summer and letting out a contented sigh.
"Truly you live a charmed life here, Georgie. This country is the best in the world."
"And so unlike your brother's estate," Georgiana said, drily. "You act as if Pemberley is the only estate in England when you know just as well that your family estate is almost as large and very nearly as pretty."
"Almost and very nearly are not the same." Richard plucked a strand of grass and chewed on it thoughtfully as he stared up at the cloudless blue sky. "Besides, I can think of at least one thing Pemberley has in its favour that Matlock has not and never will."
"Oh?"
"You!"
"Me?" Georgiana felt her cheeks redden and turned her face to the sun, praying that Richard would not notice her blush as anything other than the warmth of walking on a hot day.
"Yes, you. And Darcy and Elizabeth," he added, almost as an afterthought. He sighed. "You cannot imagine how comforting it is to be amongst such friends…"
"We are not friends," Georgiana said, after a moment's quiet reflection. She felt Richard's head turn sharply towards her without looking at him and smiled. "We are family."
"True enough!" Richard rolled onto his back and let his eyes flutter closed. "And far dearer to me than my immediate family, I confess." He dropped his voice to a whisper. "Only don't tell my brother that. He cannot help being entirely unlikeable."
"He is not entirely unlikeable!" Georgiana laughed.
"Oh, you are too kind for your own good, Georgiana. Very well, I cannot tell a lie. He is not entirely unlikeable in the general sense." Pulling his strand of grass from between his teeth he held it up like a conductor's baton. "He is perfectly clever and agreeable and rich. An eligible bachelor by even the most particular maiden aunt's standards, if he were not already married."
"Fortunate for you, then, that you are not looking for a husband." Georgiana poked him in the side. "He is a perfectly fine cousin, although I suppose I must confess that as far as brothers go, I am the most fortunate of the two of us."
"Yes, Darcy is superior to us all." Richard sighed again, but this time there was something almost melancholy about the action. When Georgiana looked at his face, it had grown serious and he stared up at the sky as if lost to thoughts too deep to be shared. They sat in silence for a moment until at last Georgiana began to feel enough time had passed without their making any progress. She thought of the families still awaiting a visit and decided they must continue and save their rest and conversation for later in the afternoon.
"Georgie." Richard's voice was so soft that she did not hear it at first. He turned his head, addressing her a second time with an urgency that made her heart beat rapidly in her chest. "Are you happy? I know…things have not been easy for you in the past. But now, with Darcy home and Elizabeth here too. Are you happy?"
"Of course." Georgiana had answered on reflex, and it was not untrue. She was happy with her brother and new sister-in-law, or happier than she had been before when George Wickham… And yet, was there not still a part of her that was dissatisfied? Some part of her that longed for more out of life than remaining quietly at home with her books and her music? She blinked, meeting Richard's gaze and feeling as if he saw right to the very core of her being. She could not hide this from him nor, at this moment, did she wish to. "I am happy, but that does not mean I do not have dreams for the future."
"And what dreams are they?" Richard was still watching her carefully, his voice soft and genuine, not his usual jocular self but a more introspective man than he usually appeared to be. "Tell me, and if I can help you to achieve 'em I will. You deserve the whole world, Georgie, and if it's in my power to give you even a little bit of it, I shall."
Georgiana's heart was in her mouth. She had never heard Richard speak like this before. All her life she had known him, but this was like seeing him for the very first time, or seeing some part of him he had previously kept hidden.
"I want what anyone wants," Georgiana said at last, hesitating over her words and fearing he could see more than she meant him to. "A husband. A home. A family." Her gaze fell. "I am not sure I shall ever have them, for -"
"Any man would be a fool to reject you. Any good man," Richard clarified. The moment passed, almost without Georgiana realising it, and Richard hauled himself to his feet.
"Well, that's quite enough serious conversation. We are supposed to be celebrating, are we not?" He bowed at the waist and reached his hands down to her and Georgiana took them, allowing him to pull her gently to stand.
"You did not tell me what your dreams are!" she protested, eager not to step away from the conversation just yet. Richard's cheery mood was back, though, and he winked, returning her own words to her with a grin.
"Oh, I want what anyone wants. A wife. A home. A family. Of course, I am far less likely to have them than you. I have no beauty or accomplishment to recommend me, and very little fortune." He sighed, reaching for his hat and pulling it comically low over his brow. "What charm I have is practised and entirely ineffective with people who do not already know and humour me." Straightening his hat, he reached for his baskets and straightened. "And I do not even have Darcy's good fortune of a sweet sister to come and keep house for me in my grumpy old bachelor age to come. No, Georgie. Let us focus on your dreams, for they have a chance of coming true."
They fell into step once more and Georgiana was pleased that Richard's burdens blocked her from his view. She let her smile fade and clutched her basket so tightly it dug into the palm of her hand but she didn't mind. The pain reminded her of reality and kept her from getting too lost in foolish dreams. Richard was her cousin and her friend, but that was all he would ever be. He sees me like a sister. A friend. Someone to protect and care for and tease and talk with. But love? He could never love me.