I.
Cora focuses her gaze on the reflection that stares back at her from the mirror. The bright white artificial lights in the large public bathroom making her already pale skin appear even more porcelain than normal and her brown eyes appear even more full of worry than usual. She attempts to form a smile at the edge of her mouth but only an anxious flash emerges, making her sigh with frustration. The Lieutenant didn't know why she was so nervous.
She had been training for this mission for months with the Pathfinder, and although this was a new challenge, she'd been up against much tougher trials in the past. Cora was a long way from her Asari Commando days now and the version of herself that stared back at her proved that. She'd grown as both a person and professionally with the Asari and her months with the Andromeda Initiative had both enhanced and polished what she'd been taught. She knew that she was ready for anything, although getting used to being back with humans was proving to be a challenge itself. She so missed the quiet calm of the Asari's and the black and white their lifestyle had provided her.
Lieutenant Harper lifts her hand from its resting place on the edge of the sink and brushes a strand of her blonde hair away from her face. This was going to be a whole new adventure and her chance to do something and see things that no one else had done before; she knew it was an honour. Her former Asari Commander, Nisira T'Kosh, had recommended Cora to Alec Ryder himself and after a very difficult few months proving herself had finally committed to the cause and him. He was the first Human Pathfinder and if she could become his successor all her hard work would have been worth it, even those weeks in a coma that she didn't want to think about.
Cora sighs as she lowers her hand back to the sink to meet its partner. There was no way she was going to let a few jitters ruin the evening, even if she felt she still had hundreds of things to do and prepare before she was to be placed into stasis. Packing your life into boxes was not an easy task. But Alec had insisted they attend and she had made the effort to ensure she played her part, even if it meant forcing herself out of her comfort zone and into a pair of very uncomfortable shoes. She wanted to show him that she was there to support him as his second because he was her Pathfinder and the closest thing she had to anyone that mattered.
"So did you hear that the twins are supposed to be at this party?" A woman's voice announces.
Cora diverts her eyes from her reflection when the sound of voices, startles her. She spots that her once quiet solace, away from the party, has been invaded by two women that are talking very loudly and with such an animation that she can only assume is aided by the tall glasses of alcohol they carry in their perfectly manicured hands. The Lieutenant looks at them for a moment longer as they move into the space behind her, the door sliding closed behind them once more blocking the overpowering sound of the party out.
Cora couldn't help but notice how much effort the pair had gone to for the celebration. Both were dressed in extravagant, if not overly revealing, dresses in the high-heeled shoes and bags to match. The glitter and gems on the fabric twinkling in the lights. Cora glances down at her open-toed shoes, oh how she wished she had the safety of her boots right now.
"I thought they weren't around much since their Mom died?" The red-dressed woman asks her friend, mouthing sorry to Cora as she almost spills her glass of sparkling wine onto her shoulder.
Cora gives her a weak smile and lowers her head to avoid appearing like she is staring at them. Alec hadn't mentioned that his children were going to be attending the party, but then he had been rather preoccupied for the last few days and the usual attention that he usually showered upon her, had been lacking. But she understood that he was being pulled in every direction and as soon as they reached Andromeda they would be focused again and building a home together.
"Estranged apparently. But Sara sometimes spends time with him I hear, but not her brother." The blue dressed woman replies.
Cora hears her struggling for a moment to open the door to the toilet stall until she sees her friend reach and removes the glass from her hand trying to stop her from losing any onto the floor.
"And who did you hear that from?" Red dress asks turning to rest against the edge of the line of sinks where Cora is now running the water, pretending that she had been in there to wash her hands and not been trying to calm her nerves. Cora lets her hand move under the sensor to dispense some soap.
"Louisa.." Cora hears from behind the door of the stall that is closed with a bang making her flinch again. The Lieutenant knew that she should hurry to finish and retreat into the other room, but the mention of her Alec and his offspring couldn't help but pique her interest. She lets the hot water run over her hands.
"From Human Resources?" The woman in red asks with a sound of amusement in her voice, Louisa from Human Resources clearly wasn't a reliable source to be having information on the Ryder family.
Cora was supposed to be the closest person to Alec and even she didn't know much about his family. She had heard him say that he loved Sara and.. What was his boy's name? He seemed proud of their achievements, but he had never shared with her the troubles that had caused the rifts between them. Of course, she had heard the rumours of why they had become so heavily involved with the Andromeda Initiative, but it wasn't Cora's job to listen to rumours.
Cora sighs lightly, she'd spent months getting as close to Alec as the prickly bastard would let her get, and still, they skirted around every subject that mattered. He would spend hours enthusing with her about everything and anything but at the mention of his past, he would close up as tight as a clam. People said he was difficult but in her heart, she wanted to believe she was close to solving the mystery of Alec Ryder. As hard work as he was, he believed in her and the potential she had and in the months leading up to this both of them had been there to save the other, so they were even. He was, after all, the reason she was leaving everything she knew behind. A new start. Together.
"Mhmm.." Comes the reply from the stall. Cora strains her ears slightly trying to catch any more of the conversation when she hears the toilet being flushed, now interested and not wanting to miss any of the stories.
Cora gives a glance over her shoulder when the stall door is thrown open again and Lady in Blue moves to join them, almost tripping over her feet from her overindulgence. "Lou told me her and Ryder dated." She adds; running the water into her sink.
"And you believe her?" Red laughs, lifting her glass to her mouth and taking a large drink of the light honey-coloured liquid. Cora gives her another weak smile as an apology as the Lieutenant moves past them both and reaches for the towel to dry her hands. "Everyone claims they've dated Ryder." She was still none the wiser.
"Well, she certainly had a lot of good things to say about him and his.. skills." Blue giggles as she lifts her hands from the sink giving them a small shake to remove any excess water. "Everyone knows he's a catch. He's gorgeous.." She adds with a dreamy sigh.
Cora had only ever met one of the Ryder twins and that was Sara. They'd trained together on a few occasions with Alec and the rest of the potential Pathfinder team and she had always seemed nice enough. Cora hadn't allowed herself to get to know Sara too closely because the guilt was too much to bear whenever she saw her. She knew that both of Alec's children were supposed to be training with them but his Son had never yet turned up. Whenever she did hear people talking about him though, they never failed to talk about him in the same way she was hearing now. He must be a real heartbreaker of the Milky Way; maybe he looked like Alec. She knew the twins were three or four years younger than her but not much else about them.
"Who do I transfer credits to so my pod is pushed up against his for this trip?!" Red raises her voice causing them both to break into fits of giggles again.
Cora wondered if they were usually as overenthusiastic as this or if the excitement of the next 36 hours and the party was spurring them on. Everyone in the Initiative appeared excited but she knew most people's excitement was covering a deeper anxiety of what was to come.
"Enjoy the party." Cora directs to the women, who pause their giggling when they hear what she is saying and turn their attention to her. Their bright painted red lips, pulling into smiles.
"Oh, you too." Lady in red replies, a warm smile and nod to accompany it. Cora moves past them both towards the door, it slides open automatically at her approach.
"Love your dress by the way." Blue smiles, pointing a painted finger at Cora's dress. "See you in 600 years!" Lady in Blue shouts after her making Cora cringe. She doubted she'd see either of them again. But then being in the last of the 20,000 other humans still to be loaded onto the Arc Hyperion in less than 36 hours, there was always a chance. She'd been told that the Nexus was certainly a sight to see too and large enough to not run into them again.
A flutter of excitement hits her when she thinks about it. Alec had taken her to visit the Hyperion after the disastrous mission she had completed for him to Home Away and it was there that she had agreed to give him everything for his cause. He'd taken her back a few times, usually at night when it was quiet and there wasn't another soul around. Everything was so unknown but with her Pathfinder leading them, what could go wrong?
Lieutenant Harper steps through the open door and back into the party that she had been dreading for weeks. It hadn't made her feel any easier when Alec, who had previously agreed to accompany her, had told her that he had important business to attend to and would meet her there. This meant she had arrived on her own and hadn't known anyone, she sometimes felt more confident when she was on his arm, or by his side. Instead of standing on her own feeling out of place, she had retreated to the bathroom and there she had stayed.
"It's just a party Cora," She hisses to herself trying to convince herself that she was going to have a good time but parties weren't her thing. The sound of loud conversation and laughter engulfs her as she glances around the room, wondering if anyone has noticed or even cared that she has been gone for a while.
Cora feels her skin prickle at the loud noise that set her senses and teeth on edge, her training making her ears more sensitive to sound. The gentle sound of a piano being played reaches her ears, a song that she doesn't recognise, but it is almost completely drowned out by the excited chatter of the guests and the noticeable sound of people celebrating their last days before the mission.
Cora takes a deep breath trying to steady her nerves, she wanted to find Alec and hopefully, his presence would reassure her as it usually did. She slides her hands down the front of her black dress, hoping that she looks okay. She'd spent hours desperately looking for something to wear and had finally settled on the faithful black dress, a true classic. She knew it complimented her figure and highlighted her best assets, it left her back bare, was long enough to look appropriate but tight enough and cut low at the front. She knew Alec would like it.
"Where are you, Alec?" Cora hisses again, to no one in particular as she lets her eyes travel around the large room. She can't help but be taken aback at how striking it is and just how exquisite the location of the party is.
She knew that the Andromeda Initiative had a lot of wealthy investors and the ship that had been offered them to host this last party on was nothing but decadent. Alec had told her that one of the investors had wanted to throw a party for a very select few of the Initiative and the people that, in his words, really mattered. Her Pathfinder had also promised that he was going to announce her as his second in command and his succession for the Pathfinder role at the party, maybe this was the true reason for her nerves. Cora had been working for this since the moment she stepped off of her parent's freighter and into the waiting ranks of the military.
"A drink Ma'am?" A smartly dressed waiter asks her as he stops with a large tray of glasses, the same that she had seen the women in the bathroom drinking.
The Initiative had a lot to celebrate with only hours to go until years of preparation and work was finally set into motion and it was obvious that the drinks were flowing to ensure everyone enjoyed their last few hours in Sol. Cora shakes her head declining the offer, sending him on his way to top up the other guests. As much as a drink would probably help with her nerves, she didn't want to show herself up during the Pathfinder's speech. There were going to be a few sore heads in the morning and they had all been under strict orders to be in a perfect physical and medical condition when they were put under stasis. No one wanted to wake up an officer with a hangover, 600 years after he was put to sleep.
"Lieutenant Harper!" Cora hears her name being called; the deep and gruff voice that she knows can only belong to her mentor. It was recognisable to her in all of its forms; from the overworked yawn at the end of a very long night of working to the excited rumble of a breakthrough of genius. Her very favourite, however, was the sleepy smile filled mumble first thing in the morning when she'd gently roused him from his slumber with her mouth.
Cora turns her face in the direction she's heard him and spots the first Human Pathfinder stood with a group of people across the room. All of them appear to be laughing at something he has said and she can't help but smile when she sees him beckoning her to him with the curve of his hand. He is dressed in his finest Initiative attire, a dark blue suit that has been made just for him, his many medals and commendations on his chest.
She knew he pretended he hated how many they had hung on him but they never failed to appear when he was out on show. Those that surround him, a mixture of AI officers, Alliance and civilians are all dressed in their best formal wear too. She notices that his ever-growing hair has been pushed back from his face in an attempt to tame his greying locks and that he lifts his hand to brush it back further. Alec had smiled when Cora told him how much she liked him with longer hair. The Initiative was a long way from the Alliance Military and she knew he was enjoying something other than a short buzz cut. He hadn't cut his hair since and she loved that it was because he knew she liked it so much. Other than him raking his fingers through his hair, he looked the same as he had done when they had parted a few hours previously.
This ship was undoubtedly designed for entertaining Cora decides as she walks slowly across the large room, apologising quietly as she moves past people to reach him. Moving cautiously as to not upset anyone's drinks and squeeze through the small groups of excited people. Cora feels his eyes meet hers as he gives her what she feels is a genuine smile, maybe he was as happy to see her as she was him. Cora feels a smile tug on her lips when she sees Alec turn to his friends again and his mouth move in words that she can't yet hear. The group roar with laughter again, Alec Ryder was always holding court and people were always clamouring to be near to him.
The Pathfinder was confident, intelligent, strong, and brilliant and people loved him for it. Almost as much as they hated him. She glances around her at the many doors and corridors that lead off of the main room, wondering exactly how many rooms this starship had. You could get very lost on here if you weren't careful.
"Harper.." Ryder says with a warmth she is sure she hasn't heard from him in public before. He surprises her when he reaches his hand out, taking hers in his palm and drawing her to his side.
Not only was he a prickly bastard, but he also was never physically affectionate towards her when there were prying eyes. He had made it very clear that he wouldn't tolerate rumours and gossiping about them. He had once placed a comforting hand on her face while on a mission in a very brief moment of weakness, but she had promised him it would never happen again and she would never put him in the situation of needing to comfort her in public.
Alec was very open about his affection for his late wife, he wore his wedding ring and informed anyone that asked that he was married to Ellen and there was nothing more to be said. Alec was a professional and a military man and she knew he found it difficult to show how he felt. Praise was hard to come by with him and that's why she knew he meant it. He didn't sugar coat his words and he certainly didn't try to please anyone. His words could be harsh and his disappointment in something you did, soul-destroying.
"Harper, I've been telling them all about you." Alec continues lifting his other hand and beckoning to the group and then back to her. She feels him place his arm so lightly around her that she can hardly feel it as if he isn't sure he should be in front of his guests, but his touch is familiar and comforting. He places his hand between her shoulder blades on the bare skin of her back.
"All good things I hope, Sir?" Cora asks watching a small smile play at the corner of his mouth. Maybe he had already told the group of his great achievement in finding and recruiting her into the Initiative, and the important role he had in training her for the mission. She wondered if he'd got to the part about where Cora had saved his life. Probably not. Modesty was not a word you would use to describe the Pathfinder.
"Ryder was sharing with us the story of how he came managed to get you into our team. He says it is one of his greatest achievements to date." A smartly dressed officer, chuckles. Nailed it. She knew him better than she knew herself but she was happy for the compliment and the sincerity behind the comment makes her cheeks flush.
"Well, I assure you, working with him is my greatest achievement too. I'm honoured that he selected me. As fulfilling as working with the Asari was, I feel it is with The Pathfinder I'm making the biggest difference." Cora smiles feeling him slide his hand down onto her lower back, his hand following the bare skin.
She looks to the group noticing that she seems to have lost their attention so steals a quick look at her mentor that he returns, his grey eyes fix on her for a moment before she sees him lower his eyes as if taking in the sight of her in her dress. Cora smiles to herself; he approved.
"See something you like, Pathfinder?" Cora whispers to him, using their brief moment of distraction to address him directly.
"Very much." The Pathfinder replies giving her a small smile and he moves to rest his hand on her hip lightly. Cora turns her attention back to the men, for a group made up of such high ranking and experienced people, the Andromeda Initiative were usually so fond of war stories. Cora had lots, she wondered if they'd like to hear about the time the Merc company Alec had sent her on a mission with, tried to kill her and she ended up floating through space. That was a good one.
"To the first Human Pathfinder and the trail he is blazing to our new home. May it be a bright one. We have no doubt we will be waking to a new start for the best that Humanity has to offer." One of the civilians announces raising his glass to Ryder.
Cora notices that Alec gives her a small smile and turns his attention away from her again; she tries to hide her slight eye roll. If this was the best Humanity had to offer they were in trouble. She knew that the few hundred people in this room had most likely bought their ways onto the Arc rather than because of what they were going to be able to contribute in Andromeda. Credits talked in this brave new world that they were heading to. The Lieutenant knew that the real best of humanity wouldn't be invited to this party and were the ones still working hard behind the scenes or the ones that had already been placed into cryo.
"To the Pathfinder." Cora nods noticing the now awkward silence, she hoped that they wouldn't have to stay and talk to them for the rest of the evening. "Well, it was certainly a pleasure to meet you all." Cora gives her best smile before looking up into Alec's face. She notices that he is watching her and that his grey pools are on hers again. "Are you okay?" Cora mouths turning her attention to him, he gives a weak smile. She sees a flash of uncertainty on his face and realises that something is troubling him.
"I need to speak to you, it's important," Alec mumbles before turning his attention back to the group for a moment. Cora sees him biting his bottom lip, a line of worry forming at the bridge of his nose that she had seen many times before when things weren't going the way Alec wanted them too. Alec Ryder didn't do weakness if anyone asked, but she knew otherwise. She knew he had spent the weeks she was in a hospital bed at her side showing how fragile he was.
"Gentlemen.." Cora begins glancing around at the group, realising she has interrupted another roar of laughter from them. "May I borrow the Pathfinder for a moment?" She asks receiving positive responses from them. "I will return him to you as soon as I can and I promise he will be back for his speech." She adds setting her eyes on him.
"You take as long as you want with him." One of the men laughs causing another round of loud laughter among the group. Cora feels her heart sink when she hears his words.
No doubt they had all been laughing at her expense and her attachment to Ryder, sharing stories of how he had invited her to his bed and how he had seduced his naive ward with soft words and promises of a better tomorrow. Maybe that was why they had all suddenly stopped laughing when she arrived. But the joke was on them, The Pathfinder hadn't seduced her like some doe-eyed student. She'd wanted Alec and he'd been a more than willing when she'd first found her way into his bed. There was no seduction involved. She'd hated him at first and he had rubbed her the completely wrong way, but as soon she'd been seriously hurt, things changed and they'd turned to each other for comfort.
"Oh you are such a jest, he is my boss." Cora giggles excessively trying to show them that their words haven't fazed her and she isn't going to be hurt by their accusations. The truth was no one knew about their relationship if it could even be called that, and she had to believe that her Pathfinder wouldn't have encouraged their words or their laughing at her expense.
Cora couldn't help but feel that he was ashamed of her and what people would say if they knew. She had earned her place at his side but she knew if people knew they would assume she had slept with him to rise through the ranks, but it hadn't been like that.
"Gentleman," The Pathfinder nods at the group before turning to her again, he holds his arm out, an offering for her to go ahead of him. Cora was so used to trailing around after him, she was certain she spent most hours of the day watching his back.
The Lieutenant moves away from them and past Alec, giving a quick look over her shoulder to make sure The Pathfinder is following her. He follows her dutifully away from the party, his feet treading the same spots of the carpet that hers have.
"What's wrong Alec?" Cora asks trying to keep the concern from her voice, turning her head to glance at him again, she sees him lower his eyes to his feet avoiding her gaze. "Has something happened?" She adds knowing he would likely berate her for all of her questions. Her training taught her to be silent, evaluate the situation, and not ask too many questions but her heart was telling her something was wrong.
"I told you not to call me that in public." Alec snaps, his tone surprised her. She was used to his temper, but he had told her; maybe more times than he should have had to.
Cora nods her head, shutting her mouth tight. He was her superior, her mentor, the Pathfinder and a man with many years of service under his belt. He had been one of the most senior members of the Alliance Military and an N7. She, of course, had no right to call him by his first name. They weren't friends or even equals. Not yet, anyway.
"Forgive me, Sir," Cora replies, suddenly feeling guilty for speaking out of turn with him and being so disrespectful to the man that had supported her career and professionally but had never been able to give her the one thing she really wanted from him.
"Let's talk in private, we can go to our room." The Pathfinder steps past her, nodding his head in the direction of one of the many corridors she had guessed led to the guest accommodation.
He noticeably wasn't going to be offering her any comforting words until they were behind a closed door. They walk for a moment in silence, the sound of the party getting quieter the further away they get until all that can be heard is the music and a dull rumble of the voices combined.
"Nothing has happened Harper." Alec finally announces, making her stop with a start when he suddenly pauses outside of a bedroom door. His use of her family name had become a form of affection, she knew, when there weren't others he felt he could use.
Cora places her hands on her hips for a moment when she watches The Pathfinder lift his arm, his Omni Tool springing to life when he hovers his fingers over the interface. She watches them move nimbly over the virtual keypad and buttons, typing in an unlock code before he holds it up to the door device. She knew even without any doubt which code it would be that he was using. It was the code that he used for everything. 210363. The twins' birth date.
Cora sighs lightly wondering when she had allowed her life to become so entangled with this man's that there were no secrets between them. She lifts her hand to pinch the bridge of her nose between her thumb and finger, squeezing her eyes tightly closed. She was getting a headache.
"Is your Implant bothering you?" The warmth had returned to his voice when she opens her eyes to look at him again.
In the months that they had been playing this game with each other, she was sure he had never directly asked her about her wellbeing and how she was feeling. He would ask about her implant or an upgrade, find an excuse to ask about something else other than ever admit he was asking about her.
"I'm fine.." Cora begins when the door slides open giving them access to the room that the Pathfinder has been assigned. "It's just a headache, Pathfinder." She adds watching him enter the room, his fingers immediately moving to unbutton the tight top button of his shirt that has been bothering him.
Cora can't help but gaze around their bedroom, it was just as luxurious as the rest of the ship and they had spared no credits in showing off how many they had. The room had been decorated with dark furniture and furnishings. A comfortable seating area set up for entertaining.
"Maybe I should call Harry." He mumbles, struggling with the button at his throat. "Show me your stats," Alec adds directing his eyes to her catching her looking around the room. "Cora. Are you listening?" He sighs in frustration trying to drag her attention back to him and away from the very sizeable bed across the room. Set just right so that they would be able to take in the view of the galaxy outside through the large expanse of glass that makes up one whole wall. She watches him turn and begin walking towards their bed as if he means to sit there.
"I don't need you to call Harry," Cora whispers trying to keep the smile from her face at his concern. She sees him lower himself to perch on the edge of the mattress; it dips slightly beneath his weight. "My implant is just fine." Cora adds; she didn't suffer too much with her biotics, which was surprising considering how strong hers were and how often he would have her test them to their extremes.
Sometimes she had headaches when there was too much static charge but the Asari's had trained her well to focus beyond them. Alec had spent a lot of time adjusting her implants and making sure they were not only the best but also safe for her.
"SAM told me you've had some spikes this evening." Alec gives her a half-smile that makes her huff. He was always using that damn SAM to check up on her and he was always so smug about it.
Cora didn't communicate with SAM much anymore, but she couldn't help but feel that it was because it didn't feel like it had when she had her own. She missed her SAM-E terribly. He was different and special and she'd gotten very attached to him. SAM-E had saved her life and made her question everything she knew about AI and in some ways, life itself. When she'd lost him and had returned to having just contact with Alec's standard Pathfinder SAM, she'd begun communicating less with him, with it.
"You know I don't like it when you do that." Cora sighs lightly which she sees only makes him smile further. People didn't get to see Alec Ryder smile very often. They said it was because of what happened to him, to his wife and his children, but Cora sometimes saw it.
Cora can't resist looking past him again and to the bed, it looked so comfortable and inviting. She didn't think she'd ever seen a bed so big, she hoped he wouldn't lose her in the night. She wondered if Alec would mind if she just slipped off her shoes and climbed in, taking him with her of course.
Cora never thought she would get used to sleeping in beds again after all of her years sleeping on the floor, in transports, and sometimes on her feet. Now she shared a bed with the Pathfinder when he had the time for her. Maybe they could spend the evening together here instead of going back to the party. Maybe tonight was the night he would admit he cared about her. Maybe he would tell her that he wanted to be with her and no one else and that he was going to tell everyone that they were together. Maybe Salarian's would grow wings and fly around the moon.
"Stats," Alec repeats drawing her back to him again. She sees that he has given up with his buttons and is now looking intently at her. "Harper." He adds lowering his voice. "Please?" Cora diverts her eyes from him for a moment; he was going to get his way like he always did. All he had to do was say her name and she was his.
"Fine." The Lieutenant sighs, she quickly bends down to remove her shoes deciding her feet and sanity were much better off without them. She tucks her finger into the strap at her heels, slipping them onto the floor. "All stats are normal." Cara begins as she swipes her finger through the stats on her Omni, the numbers and levels showing on the display on her arm. "Biotics and Implant normal." Cora continues, she could rattle off the list of her vitals but there were so many they could track.
Cora looks to Alec again seeing him nod at her words, satisfied that it is just a headache and nothing he has given her acting up. He was susceptible to implant discomfort and she would often wake in the middle of the night and find him trying to stretch or relieve himself of the pain he felt in his muscles.
He was almost constantly suffering from headaches too but he told her it was to be expected. Ryder was the strongest, fittest and healthiest man she'd ever met in his 50's but the years of military life was creeping up on him. It was taking him longer to get out of the bed in the morning and she'd see him shaking out the aches in his fingers when he'd been holding a gun too long. It was taking him longer to heal and he was relying on SAM more to keep him safe these days than just his reflexes.
"SAM says your pulse has been all over," Cora watches him fix his eyes on her again. "He said your heart has been working overtime." He adds. The Lieutenant watches him reach to the top of his tightly buttoned jacket, using his steady and expertly trained hands to undo each one until he can shrug it off of his shoulders and onto the floor.
Cora hears the thud it makes when it hits the floor, she sometimes wondered how he managed to hold himself upright with all of the medals he had to wear on his chest.
"I'm just nervous." Cora mumbles watching his every move with interest, she tries to fight back a laugh when she sees him drop his coat without any care.
When they had first met she had teased him mercilessly about the fact that he folded all of his clothes before he got into bed. She was a very bad influence on him because these days he often had to go searching for his clothes in the morning due to his eagerness to get out of them. He leans over, bending at the waist to untie his shoes, which he discards to the side with his jacket.
Cora realises she's been staring at him too long when he looks up at her. He lifts his hand to the button that he had been having so much trouble with again. She didn't think she'd ever felt so nervous. She wanted to be a Pathfinder like Alec and until she'd met him nothing but her career had mattered to her. She had planned on walking away from the Initiative when she'd wondered if it was right for her, but he wouldn't let her go.
"Help an old man out?" The Pathfinder chuckles. His shirt was new and so stiff and crisp it was no wonder he was struggling, it had taken him long enough to put it on this afternoon, in his apartment.
She didn't like when he referred to himself as an old man. Okay so he was more than twice her age, and he was old enough to be her father, but she didn't care. Cora had dated men her age and none of them came close to Alec.
"Are you getting ready for bed, old man?" Cora giggles when she hears him snort at her comment. They both knew that even with the years he had on her, he was in the prime of his life and enjoying every moment of it. Cora crosses the last part of the room between them, coming to a stop in front of him. She bats his hands away with hers to undo the top button on his shirt, he gives her a smile as thanks. Cora had no doubt her stats wood be spiking again being so close to him and Alec Ryder quite often let her heart racing.
"I have to change for the speech." Ryder begins "They want to see the new armour, remember?" Alec nods towards the two trunks that have been stacked at the side of the room. They contained their new Initiative armour that Alec had been working on for months, one set for him and one set for her. The tech was new and the materials were expensive. It was just another way for them to display the wealth the organisation now had to spend on new toys, weapons, and tech.
"I remember." Cora smiles, she was proud of the grumpy man sat before her even if she felt like he sometimes didn't deserve it. He was a genius and every genius had their faults.
The first time she had set eyes on him he was so engrossed in his work he didn't even look at her, but she'd persevered with him and now his eyes were always on her. But still, she often had to try and drag him away to remind him to sleep and eat.
Cora strokes her hands gently over his shoulders feeling him relax beneath her touch, the palms of her hands moving against the cool of his shirt. She could feel the tension in his body; he'd been working too hard as always. She slides her hands onto his neck as she dips her head to press a soft kiss against his mouth. "I've been waiting all day to kiss you" Cora mumbles against his mouth.
Cora feels him smile beneath her lips as he lifts his hand to cup her cheek with his palm. Sometimes a brief tender action would throw her off guard and when he was with her she saw the gentle Alec that no one else got to see. But it never lasted very long and soon she would see the angry Alec and the destructive Alec. She sometimes compared him to a mad scientist that always had something he was tinkering with and that would obsess unhealthily over something he was working on. Every time she had convinced herself that she should leave him, that their relationship would never be more than this, that he was breaking her heart more every day when the fighting became too much, he would kiss her and beg her not to leave. Of course, she would stay. He was lifting her professionally to make himself look good but he was controlling her life.
"You'll make us late," Alec smirks when he breaks their kiss. "I'm due to make my speech in," The Pathfinder begins glancing at his Omni. "Four hours." He adds leaning up to capture her lips again making her giggle.
Cora sighs when she watches him get to his feet so that he can wrap his arms tightly around her drawing her closer to him. She accepts his embrace and slides her arms around his neck, trailing her fingers through his hair; she really did love it this way. She smiles to herself when she feels him pressing kisses against her bare shoulder and his hands move agonisingly slowly down her back, his fingers gripping her waist.
She knew they needed to change and that there was a room full of people waiting to hear what he had to say, but she was at that moment feeling lucky to have him to herself and was hoping that they would be spending at least the next three hours and forty-five minutes entwined. She hated all of the sneaking around that they had to do and she hated that she had no one to talk to but Alec. Part of her knew how unhealthy it was to spend every moment with this man but he'd become everything she had. She loved him and that's why she let him get away with it.
"I'm going to miss you," Cora sighs feeling his mouth pause at the base of her neck. She knew he would never tell her the same, but she hoped he would miss her too.
Soon they would be placed into stasis for 600 years and although to them it would only feel like a very good nights sleep, she loathed that the last time she would see him in this galaxy would be in such a formal situation. How long after they had been woken up would it be until they were together again? They hadn't spent much time apart for a very long time and although Alec would sometimes disappear for days leaving her worried and alone, he'd always come home in the end with an excuse, but never an apology.
"You'll be awake and picking the spot for your house before you know it." He whispers against her neck. Cora tries to force the wave of sadness down at his words, he hadn't mentioned himself in the plans for a new home with her and it stung.
"Alec." Cora sighs when she feels him guiding them back towards the bed. If they were going to be late, it might as well be fashionably. Right now she didn't care, all her previous worries about what he wanted to talk to her about, gone. Ryder presses his lips against hers she forgets about everything but him.
When the backs of his knees come into the contact with the edge of the bed, he picks her up letting her wrap his legs firmly around his waist. Cora can't help but giggle when the Pathfinder sits back onto the bed taking her with him. She places her legs either side of his hips, leaning over him until her body is pressed against his. Before she can gain her balance he crushes his mouth to hers again, his hands taking hold of handfuls of her black dress trying to reach bare skin.
"Pathfinder," Cora reluctantly breaks their kiss when she hears the familiar tones of SAM. "Lieutenant Harper's heart rate is currently reading at increased levels." SAM continues, that causes Ryder to begin laughing in response.
"Lieutenant Harper is fine, SAM." The Pathfinder laughs, a sound that makes Cora smile when she hears it. She places her hands on his chest feeling it move beneath her as he laughs.
"So much better than fine." Cora whispers kissing the corner of his mouth while she undoes each of the remaining buttons on his shirt, helping him slide it off of his arms and dropping it onto the floor with his jacket. Cora leans forward and nips playfully at his collarbone making him groan.
"Pathfinder. I fail to understand your response to my observations." SAM continues. "You assigned me the task of monitoring Lieutenant Harper's statistics at all times and inform you immediately of any change. I am informing you of a change as instructed." SAM's voice concludes.
"SAM pause monitoring, please. The Pathfinder is going to be otherwise occupied." Cora giggles before turning her attention back to Ryder. She strokes her hands over his chest, her fingers trailing through the soft greying hair she finds. She hadn't mentioned it, but he was a lot more salt and pepper than when they had first met. Alec's happy sigh draws her back to looking down into his face. "Alec, you don't need to keep checks on me through SAM. I can take care of myself." She adds seeing him nod and drop his eyes.
"I know," Alec sighs. "I know you can handle anything." He adds; looking into her eyes again, he gives her a reassuring smile. Cora leans over him again as she slides his hands up her back, she places a kiss against his stubble-covered cheek before beginning to press light kisses along his jaw.
"Then why are you worried?" She whispers giving a slight rock of her hips, moving on top of him and receiving another groan from deep in his chest. She feels his hands return to her waist.
"I'm your Pathfinder." Alec sighs; Cora notices that the same worried look has appeared on his face again. She worried about him and sometimes forgot that he had 20,000 other people to worry about other than her, most of the time it felt like he did care about all of those strangers more than her. "I'm your boss. It's my job to monitor you." Cora stops her kisses when she hears what he has said.
"Is that how you see me?" Cora asks trying to keep her voice even and not show him how much his words have hurt her, how much he always hurts her. After everything that had happened and everything that she had overcome for him. She'd almost died for him and his SAM project. "Am I just a perk of your job Pathfinder?" Cora huffs.
"You are a distraction, nothing more." The Pathfinder replies, his voice quiet and having lost any affection he had previously been showing her. He places his hands at her waist moving her off of him and onto the bed. "A distraction, I've let influence my decisions." He sighs making Cora falter. "I should get ready." Ryder replies, Cora, noticing how quickly his mood has changed. "They are expecting me to announce my team."
"A distraction?" Cora replies beginning to raise her voice, she wasn't going to let him get away with it this time. Every time they argued over nothing he would say things to hurt her and walk away, but not this time. "How can you say that to me, Alec? How dare you make me feel like I'm nothing to you." Cora feels her anger begin to flare when he moves off of the bed and turns his back on her; he snatches his jacket and shirt from the floor.
"You should go." Alec approaches the bed again as if he is going to attempt to remove her from the room. "We shouldn't be doing this anymore." He adds as Cora jumps to her feet ready to make it as difficult as possible for him to move her. She sees that there is no anger in his face but that he looks like he is making the hardest decision he's ever made and already regretting his actions and words. "This doesn't have to be difficult." He adds, making Cora let out an angry sob as she feels the tears threatening to fall. He looks into her face when he hears it, his grey eyes mirroring the sadness she knows he can see in hers. He was tearing her heart out of her chest and telling her it didn't have to be difficult.
"I have nowhere to go." Cora sniffs, she sees him just nod deciding that he should be the one leaving. "What did I do wrong, Alec?" She asks drawing her arms close to her body trying to hold the tears inside her. "Why now? We are leaving tomorrow and you decide you don't want me anymore?" She whispers watching him buttoning up his shirt and slipping his jacket back onto his body. After everything they had been through together he was deciding to end it and he wouldn't even tell her why.
"It's not you.." The Pathfinder begins only to be cut off by another angry snort from her that stops his words.
She watches him open his mouth to finish the sentence before closing it tight. She wanted to shout and scream at him, she wanted to cry and beg him to stay but all she could do was screw her eyes shut and try to not let him see her tears.
"Are you going to use that line on me?" Cora looks up at him again and sees him shake his head. Surely he was smarter than to break her heart and give her a bullshit reason as to why. It was her fault; he had always made it clear it had always been her fault.
Cora moves away from him suddenly feeling like she wanted to put as much space between them as she could, ashamed of how she was feeling. She always knew this day would come, he would never admit how he felt and she couldn't spend the rest of her life feeling unloved and hoping he would change. She'd let her focus shift from her career to wanting to be loved by him.
"Andromeda will be a new start for both of us." The Pathfinder sighs, a sadness in his voice that only makes her angry that he felt he had any right to be upset when he had caused this.
She had done everything he had ever asked of her and more, stood by his side and supported him through everything and he had ruined it. She had given him everything. Cora watches him slip his feet into his shoes. He was leaving.
"We were supposed to have a new start together." Cora murmurs, she didn't know why she was fooling herself that her words would make a difference. He'd made up his mind and he'd decided that he didn't need her.
They'd fought before, but this was different. They'd both shouted at each other until they were blue in the face, both of them saying things that they immediately regretted but as soon as it was over he had been there with an offer of his arms and reassurance and a promise that they wouldn't argue again. Rinse and repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.
"I have a responsibility to the Initiative. I have a responsibility to those people that need my guidance and for me to find them a home." The Pathfinder begins making Cora scoff at his words, now he was suddenly caring about his responsibilities. "They need me focused and I can't do that when I am so caught up with you."
"Fuck you and fuck your responsibility," Cora shouts feeling the anger rising again, she wouldn't let him try and twist this and make him the victim. "Do not put your insecurities on me and act like you were being used in this relationship." Cora snaps at him. She feels the tension in her jaw and knows she needs to calm herself or her biotics will flare. "You used me, Alec. You made promises you have no intention of keeping. You manipulated me, and my feelings for you and now you try and act like I'm the one that used you? Don't make out that you are innocent in all of this, you knew exactly what you were doing."
Cora tries to take a deep breath feeling like her anger was getting the better of her. This wasn't how she was trained, this wasn't how she conducted herself and if she wasn't careful she was going to end up zapping him. She closes her eyes for a moment focusing on her breathing but all she can hear is Alec moving towards her again.
"Do not come near me Alec Ryder, I swear I will lose it with you." Cora snaps at him, she opens her eyes and sees him raising his hands in defence. She had every right to be angry with him but being court marshalled would not look good for her.
She watches him lift his hands in the air again as if he doesn't even know what to say to defend himself. Cora was finally calling him out for his behaviour and he had nothing to say about it. Cora sighs, he was supposed to be the mature adult in their situation and he was acting like a child and tossing her aside like a toy he was bored of. She sees him run his hands through his hair.
"Will you listen?" The Pathfinder asks, crossing his arms across his chest. Cora lets a cool laugh escape her lips; he lost all rights and the privilege of her listening and hanging on his every word when he decided how little she, and her feelings, mattered.
"You listen. All you wanted was for someone to warm your bed and you got in too deep, but you won't admit how you feel. You think it's easier to break up with me than admit that the great Alec Ryder has feelings for someone other than himself. Tell me you don't love me." She spits regretting her final words, he didn't love her and that wasn't entirely his fault.
"Harp.." The Pathfinder begins but she lifts her hand stopping his words. She knew the next words out of his mouth weren't going to be the ones she needed to hear.
"Tell me you don't care about us and we will never discuss this again. I will carry on pretending that I am your doting student so that you can continue to congratulate yourself for my achievements." Cora sees him dip his head slightly at her words. She was going too far now. "But unlike the promises you made me, I promise you, Alec, that you will never receive another moment of my love if you leave me now." Cora sobs as her tears begin to flow harder, angry with herself that she is going to let him see her cry. She was stronger than this and he didn't deserve her tears. "I will never shed another tear for you." She cries.
"There is, no us." The Pathfinder mumbles, lifting his eyes to look at her. She brings her hand to wipe the tears from her eyes, his words feeling like a final twist of a knife through her heart. "There never has been. There is me and there is you. We will never be more than this."
"Get out, Pathfinder." Cora whispers, not wanting to hear anything more from him. She watches him nod his head knowing that there is nothing more he can say to redeem himself and take back what he has said.
Cora shakes her head at him when he looks at her again, his light grey eyes rimmed with his tears that he fixes on her. He crosses the room, trying to compose himself before reaching the door. And then he is gone and she wishes she'd zapped him for being an asshole and breaking up with her before she got the chance to break up with him.