Chapter 1

Life doesn't discriminate

Between the sinners and the saints

It takes and it takes and it takes

And we keep living anyway

We rise and we fall and we break

And we make our mistakes

If there is a reason I'm still alive

When so many have died

Then I'm willing to wait for it

"Chloe! Are you ready yet?!" Avi's frantic voice calls from the foyer. I hear the front door creak as she cracks it open in her impatience.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm coming," I call back, throwing my beanie on my head as I step off the staircase and walk through the hallway to meet Avi.

"Mom, we're leaving!" Avi calls as she practically shoves me out the front door. The door slams before I can even hear her mom's response. I walk toward Avi's car as she locks the door and darts after me. "I swear Chloe, you got to stop making me late to church, especially on Wednesdays. I'm a youth leader, remember? I have to be there early." She unlocks the car and swings the door open, sliding into the driver's seat and slamming the door shut behind her in frustration.

"Or you could just stop dragging me with you every week," I mutter as I slide in and shut the door behind me. "It's not like I even sit with you in the youth room. I have to go sit with the adults." Avi shoots me a look as she starts the car and I let out a sigh. She throws the car in drive and takes off down the driveway. The seat belt alarm dings and I buckle up with a groan to avoid a lecture from my chauffeur. I still feel a glare shoot my way as Avi puts on her blinker and turns onto the main road. I let out a sigh as I look out the window at the trees flying by.

"It has been two years since you've moved in with us," Avi says, her frustration clearly evident in her voice. "You know how important it is for me to be early to help at church. I'm tired of being constantly late to church."

"We're never late for church," I snap back, still staring out the window, "just later than you want to be."

"We are late for when I'm supposed to be there on Wednesday nights!" Avi almost yells. "I have to be there early since I'm a youth leader. Mrs. Tammy thankfully hasn't said anything but I'm supposed to set the example. Can we just try to leave when we're supposed to?"

I let out a sigh. The rebellious side of me wants to dig my heels in and make it an issue but I push it aside as I say, "I can try. Just being ready on time hasn't exactly ever been my strong suit, especially after working all day."

"I know," Avi says, her voice softening. "And I know these couple years have been a crazy adjusting period for you. My family's dynamic is a lot different from yours and you've made it work and been a trooper."

"Yeah," I say with a sigh, "it's like two completely different worlds. I mean it wasn't all that different when my dad was alive but since the crash, we have never functioned as a unit like yours does. And we certainly weren't the kind to go to church every day the doors were open. That's probably been my biggest adjustment. You know I'm not the biggest fan."

Avi lets out a quiet sigh before putting on a fake smile and saying, "But really, what would you rather be doing besides having me drag your butt to church?" I chuckle softly and return a small smile. She has no idea how much I'd rather go than stay home alone, I think to myself. But I'm not admitting to her how terrified I am to be away from her since my nightmares started again after our trip back home three months ago. I subtly dig my nails through the hole in my jeans into my skin to distract myself as flashbacks of my most recent nightmares run through my head; now with added scenes of Avi being thrown into the mix. It would be nice to actually spend a night not watching or reliving someone I love die.

"Chloe," Avi says. I glance her way for a moment, her voice pulling me from my thoughts, "I don't want you to think I'm ungrateful for what you've done to adjust to living with my family or that I want you to change. You have done so much to conform to my family's lifestyle when you didn't have to and I am beyond grateful that you're here. I guess I just become a jerk after a long day at work, I'm sorry for taking it out on you." She lets out a sigh.

"I know, Av," I say as I put a hand on her leg. "You know I have my moments of being a jerk and sometimes I've taken it out on you without a reason at all." I give her a sheepish smile.

"Still love me?" Avi asks with a bit of genuine question in her voice.

"Of course I do," I say as I lay my head on her shoulder to try and reassure her. "What kind of question is that?" I feel her rest her head on top of mine for a moment before she straightens up and I finally sit up too. I look over at Avi as she lets out another sigh. I put a hand on her leg, "Second year of teaching getting to you?"

"It's not the teaching," Avi says with a slight sniffle. "And even my class this year is so much better behaved than last year. I just have a couple students who are just awful and I just feel overwhelmed." I see her wipe her face and notice her red eyes. My face softens as I place a hand on her shoulder and rub it.

"I'm sorry Av," I say softly.

"Did I tell you one of them today said, 'I don't disrespect all adults. Just you'?" Avi says with a slight chuckle. "Fourth grade is the new sixth when it comes to attitude."

"Wow," I say laughing, "kids are freaking jerks. It's like earlier this week when I was helping clean in the cafeteria during lunch and one kid yells across the room 'You missed a spot!' as he dumps the rest of his juice onto the floor. I could have slapped him." Avi's eyes widen as we both start laughing.

"This is why I couldn't do middle or high school," Avi says. "Imagine this attitude times ten?!"

"I would probably throw myself in front of the school busses pulling in," I say with a nervous chuckle. Silence hangs in the car for a moment. Avi notices the song on the radio and turns it up as I go back to staring out the window. I pull my phone out of my back pocket and check the signal. Might as well do some scrolling before we enter no man's land, I think to myself as I open Facebook. The first post that pops up is an article from KBAY 7 News from back home. I almost scroll past it but something in the article's title makes me scroll back up. "Former renowned photographer and professor escaped from prison", the title reads and I almost drop my phone. "Please don't be who I think it is," I say to myself as I tap on the link. The escapee's face immediately pops up on the article and my eyes widen. I don't even realize my body has started shaking.

"Chlo'?" Avi asks as she puts a hand on my shoulder. "What's wrong?"

"Jefferson is out," I force out, my chest already tight from anxiety. "Jefferson escaped from prison."

Silence fills the car for a moment before Avi says, "You don't mean the one who mentored Nathan and drugged all those girls to take pictures of them?"

"That's the one," I say coldly, trying to keep myself from crumbling. "He's the one who taught Nathan his style. He's the reason why Nathan drugged Rachel. He's the one who drove Nathan to be the psychopath he became. Jefferson was behind all of it." I feel my throat tighten as tears prick the back of my eyes. This can't be happening.

"Hey, shh," Avi says as she awkwardly wraps an arm around me. I allow myself to fall against her as the fear breaks through in sobs. I clutch her tightly, terrified to let her go. Jefferson has been behind me losing two people that I love, what if he takes her too? "Chloe?" Avi says in a soft voice and I clutch her a little tighter in response. "It's okay. I'm right here. Everything is going to be okay."

"You don't know that," I squeak out. "If anything my life has taught me, it's that almost never is everything okay."

Avi pulls me closer to her, "Do you have any reason to believe he'd go after you or me?" I shake my head. "Then there is no reason to believe we're in any danger. And even if something does happen, I don't think he's going to feel too great coming up against these." She morphs her hand into a paw for a second to show her claws before shifting it back to a hand and setting it on the steering wheel. "He probably just wants to hide out long enough to be able to go back to photography. Maybe get a black-market plastic surgeon and change his name." That would almost make sense, I think to myself. "Besides," Avi adds, "I know my God. No matter what happens, everything will be okay." Avi pulls into the church parking lot as I start shoving my feelings down and wiping my face, still clutching Avi with one hand. As she parks the car, she looks down at me and asks, "Are you going to be okay?" I nod as she wraps both arms around me for a moment, "Everything is going to be okay. I love you."

"I love you too," I say as I squeeze her back.

Avi unwraps her arms as she says, "You okay to head in?" I nod as I wipe my face one more time and straighten my beanie. As we both step out of the car and head to the church, the only think I can think is, I'm glad you can believe God will work everything out, Avi. But I haven't seen Him do that once for me yet.

Wait for it