Peter's heart is pounding so fast it feels like it might actually burst out of his chest. Above, another loud bang. A shot being fired. Peter curls smaller into himself, remembering the last time he'd heard shots fired.Jet, crying out.He listens for the fight to resume, but it's silent, no more shots, nor thuds of bodies falling or wrestling. Silence. Somehow, that's worse.
"Is it over?"
A voice from the crowd, and Peter wants to scream at them -Are you crazy? Be quiet! -But he doesn't dare make a sound.
"Crazy guy," Another voice, the sarcastic voice of earlier, now shaking, "I really hope you were right about your brother."
A feeble attempt to cover hope with fear. Peter's seen it many times before, he's tried the same thing before, a long time ago, in the bunker, before it went dark. He can hear the unspoken words that settle on the tension in the basement.
"Because otherwise, we're screwed."
Mathew doesn't respond, but Peter knows the answer when he peeks at Mathew. Mathew's jaw is tense, eyes trained on the door at the top of the basement stairs, whole body coiled and tense. Mathew doesn't look relieved. He looks scared.
"It's not him."
Peter hears himself whisper the words, then freezes, horrified at how he'd let his thoughts slipped, and the consequences that might come from his reaction. Mathew flicks his gaze back to Peter temporarily, and Peter sees resignation, and something else- resolve? - in Mathew's eyes.
"Al's not that good at being quiet."
Mathew confirms Peter's words softly, and Peter can feel Mathew's emotions through his words. Mathew stands up, and Peter realizes he was wrong. Mathew wasn't scared. In Peter's eyes, this is worse. He knows what the people who aren't scared are like, the things they do. He knows how they end up. Peter doesn't want to see any more bodies. Even though he's still wary of Mathew, even though his instincts scream for him to hide, to stay quiet and unnoticed, Peter moves, grabbing Mathew's hand.
"Mathew! Don't go!"
He's not sure what it is about Mathew's face, or the way he rose up, or the look in his eyes, that makes Peter feel like Mathew is going to go, but he knows he's right. He's seen this look before. Every time the person who wore this look left, saying they'd get help, or that they'd protect the kids. Every time, they didn't come back. At least, not alive.
And despite everything, despite his fear, despite his wariness and distrust of Mathew, there's something deeper in Peter that's crying out that he can't let Mathew go. Because PeterlikesMathew, even though he knows he shouldn't. Because he wants to trust Mathew. And because he doesn't want to be alone anymore.
Mathew barely hesitates, and when he looks back to Peter, Peter knows it's hopeless. It's always like this. The resolve and resignation in Mathew's eyes hasn't waned, in fact, it seems even stronger, and from that alone Peter knows that he can't stop Mathew. Mathew's already made his choice, and nothing Peter can say will change that. Even so, Peter still wants to try.
"You can't!" He's pleading, he knows, on the verge of tears, but Peter won't stop. "Didn't you say your brother is coming? You have to be hear when he comes!"
Peter can't lost Mathew. Mathew is all Peter has left. So he uses Mathew's weakness against him, the precious brother that Mathew bragged about in the dark. A brother that Peter didn't believe was coming, but Peter wasn't the one who needed to believe it. The one he needed to believe in Alfred was Mathew, and Mathew did believe, unfailing, that Alfred would come, that his brother was fine. And Peter wasn't above using this.
"What about Alfred?"
He throws the words put like an attack, painfully aware that his voice is too loud, that it's dangerous, but he can't help it. Mathew is frozen, and Peter is scared to look at his expression. The only thing he can do is speak, say anything he can to keep Mathew from leaving. To keep Mathew by his side. So Peter speaks.
"Do you know he's always on his phone? He's always looking at his phone with this sad look when he thinks no one's looking! He told me that he's waiting for you!"
Peter's so desperate he's choking on his own breath, and he tries to calm down. He needs to calm down, because if he loses it here, he loses Mathew. And if he loses Mathew-
"You said Alfred is definitely gonna come, right!" Peter begs, trying to keep his voice from breaking, "So then, you have to be here when he comes!"
For the sake of Peter, who has no one else left in this world, and for the sake of the man who checks his phone for messages every chance he gets, for Alfred's twisted and hopeful gaze, and for the sake of a brother who's waiting for his family to come, Peter needs Mathew to stay. For the sake of someone else, waiting for their family to come back, Peter needs Mathew to stay alive. Because Peter knows how much it hurts when no one comes.
"Peter..."
Mathew's free hand falls on his head. A sudden and unexpected thump sounds from above, but Mathew doesn't flinch this time. Instead, he couches down to Peter's height, and Peter fearfully seeks Mathew's eyes.
"It's okay,"
Mathew soothes, and from this alone Peter's heart sinks, lost in a chasm inside him. Because Mathew's soft eyes have hardened with resolve.
"Didn't you say you didn't want to wait anymore?"
Mathew's trying to be gentle, but that just hurts more. Peter chokes on a sob, threatening to overwhelm him. Mathew pats Peter's head, and Peter barely registers the goosebumps that it gives him.
"Hey, Peter," Peter's I yes are swimming with tears, making Mathew's face blur, "I promised, eh? That if Alfred doesn't come, I'll protect you."
Mathew's heartless promise feels like a goodbye to Peter now, and he wishes he'd never heard it.
"Even if he doesn't come, I'll save us for sure, so don't worry."
Mathew stands up, and his actions pull his hand away, leaving a sudden chill on Peter's head.
"I'll be fine, I promise." Mathew's voice changes the slightest bit. "You know I'm stronger than I look."
A secret message for Peter, the only one in that basement who knows who Mathew is. Or rather,whatMathew is. But even countries aren't unbeatable, and Peter knows that Mathew is just acting strong. He doesn't remember Canada, not well, and that alone is enough to make him uneasy. Maybe Mathew was right. Maybe if it was Alfred, he could save them. No matter how foggy his memory is, Peter knows that America is strong. But Canada isn't America.
Mathew starts to move, wading through the crowd carefully, and Peter knows he's lost. He knew from the start that Mathew had made up his mind. Peter curls into himself, burying his head in his arms as the tell-tale creak let's him know Mathew has reached the stairs. He doesn't want to see what happens next.
He's tired of broken promises.
Then, the door slams open.